Loki X Reader Funny - Tumblr Posts
Locusts. LokixF!Reader.(insect warning)

Request by @whothehellisloki :Hi I just found your writing today and not gonna lie I read almost everything XD but you write so well and I love your style! I’m not sure if ur still taking requests, but if you are could you do a Loki x F!Reader where Loki and the reader team up in a prank war against the team and it’s just super cute and fluffy?? Again I love your writing so so so much! Thx u!
...
"Y/n.. isn't that too mean?"
"Since when do you care about anything being 'too mean'?" You laugh out at your soon to be husband.
"... you're right. Who am i kidding? Let's do this!" Loki nods and you hum a 'yesss' .
Ever since you and Loki got engaged, the team started pranking you because you two where too invested in each other.
This resulted in a prank war that you and him are obviously nailing! I mean, you can't beat the God of Mischief and his girl in a prank war!
You tap on the name "Tony" in your contacts after making sure to call anonymously. Meanwhile,Loki transforms into Nick Fury.
"Hello?" You hear Tony on the other side of the line.
"Y-yes, Tony it's m-me.." Loki stutters in his form.
"Fury? Why are you stuttering? Is there an emergency?" You can hear Tony's concern.
"Look..uh.. a lady called Mariza came to my house.. she's from Wildlife services.." He tries his best not to laugh.
"Is there an emergency? Do they need us?"
"In this case.. there's nothing we can do.." Loki says dramatically.
"If you tell me there's another Thanos coming, i'm gonna flip!" Tony almost yells and you silently laugh.
"No..there's a locust apocalypse.."
"What the fuck are you on, Fury?"
"See.. it rained yesterday and locusts went out of their homes.. You need to turn off all lights, close all windows and any electricity in general. They are a lot!" Loki elbows your side to stop you from laughing.
"Oh. So it's serious.. Uh.. okay fine, we'll do that.." Tony closes the phone and does as told."F.R.I.D.A.Y , shut down the whole building."
"Yes sir. Is there an emergency?"
"Locusts." Tony says and Natasha laughs from the other side of the room.
The building starts shutting down,doors and windows closing, leaving the Avengers in complete darkness.
"Locusts? Really?" The redhead says and Sam bursts into laughter. "Turn the damn lights on, Stark."
"There's no way you're actually shutting down the building because of locusts!" Clint laughs out.
"That's obviously a prank. Loki and Y/N are behind this,i'm sure!" Steve says seriously, trying to find his way around in the pitcy black living room.
"My brother is extremely annoying." Thor crosses his hands in front of his chest.
"Oh yes, how did this not cross my mind? F.R.I.D.A.Y, turn on all electricity and open all doors and windows. Give me the exact location of Loki and Y/N."
"Yes sir."
As the doors and windows open,locusts fill the living room, sending the superheroes into panick mode.
"What the actual hell?" Wanda says in her tick accent.
"Is this part of the prank or is there actually a locust apocalypse?!" Bucky almost screams.
"Ha! Told you this was gonna work!" Watching the footage on the screen from the cameras, you squeal and hug Loki, who is more than happy to see you have fun.
"I can't believe humans are so scared of insects!" He shakes his head and then you both burst into laughter again.
Steve is trying to kick the poor insects away from him,Tony is on a table targetting and shooting them, Clint is screaming , Natasha is nowhere to be seen, Sam is yelling curse words,Thor is playing with a locust, saying that he made a new friend, Bucky is hiding behind Sam, and Wanda , being the only calm one in the situation, uses her powers to pick up as many locusts as possible and throws them out of the window.
"I can't wait to keep doing this with you for the rest of my life.." Loki says and your heart almost jumps out of your chest.
"I can't wait either honey... So many more to come in our lives. I love you!"
"I love you too, honey." He leans in for a kiss and you are quick to kiss him back.
"Hey. I know y'all are listening!" You pull apart and see Sam as close to the camera as possible. "Next time y'all do anything insect-related, me and Bucky are gonna get you back and there will be no mercy. That was not a warning. That was a statement!" Sam points at the camera and you laugh behind the screen.
"Oh, how about uniting our teams together?" Bruce walks in the room.
"Where were you this whole time? We needed the hulk-smash. I am so disappointed in you-"
Being part of the Avengers is hard,but moments like this are what kept you sane all these years.
These guys are your friends and without them, you wouldn't have met the love of your life.
Y/n: *eating candy*
Loki: *reaches out his hand to take one*
Y/n: I wouldn’t do that if I were you...
Loki: *frowns* What? Why not?
Y/n: These are some of the sourest candies Earth has to offer...
Y/n: *grins* I’m not sure you could handle it.
Loki: *looks you dead in the eye* Is that a CHALLENGE?
Loki: *rips the package out of your hands*
Y/n: Wait, you shouldn’t eat too many-
Loki: I’ll eat as many as I choose, thank you very much.
Loki: *shoves 10 into his mouth*
Y/n: ...
Loki: ...
Y/n: ...
Loki: *coughs them all out* You call this FOOD? Nothing so VILE has ever touched my tongue before-
Loki: *spots Thor walking past the open doorway*
Loki, running after him: THOR, YOU HAVE TO TRY THIS CANDY, IT’S DELICIOUS!
Loki: *shoves the bag of candy into Thor’s hands* Eat as many as you want.
Thor: *eats half the pack in one go* Not bad...
Loki: *slowly backing away* H-how?
Thor: You want the bag back?
Loki: No...it’s y/n’s...
Thor, walking past Loki: *enters the room you’re sitting in*
Y/n: *sees the depleted candy bag*
Y/n, staring in awe: How many did you EAT??
Thor: I’m not really sure to be honest.
Y/n: And you actually LIKED it?
Thor: Oh no, it was disgusting... but Loki said they were delicious and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings.
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Taglist: @bluebunnlee @chroniclesofmedicine @klanceiscannon14 @lokislilcaribbeanprincess @soulnoon @imjustaworldoffandom @wildmoonstone @ironmaidenmidgardqueen
Lady Y/N please stop asking Loki
You: *muttering* Loki or whoever's up there and listening. Please make it rain. It's too hot.
- Meanwhile in Asgard -
Loki: *heard the muttering* Hmmm? A Midgardian asking me for help? I shall comply. Oh, Big Brother~
Thor: Yes Loki? You needed something from me?
Loki: Apologies in advance. A Midgardian called out to me for help. *Materializes his knife*
Thor: Loki? Loki?? *sees the knife* No. Don't. Not my hair.
- 5 mins later -
Thor: My HAIR! LOKI!!!!!!!!!! *summons Mhjolnir*
Loki: *Runs away*
- Back at Earth -
You: IT'S RAINING!!!!! THANK YOU LOKI!!!
- 1 month later -
Thor: NOT AGAIN!!! LOKI!!!!!
Loki: My Midgardian asked me again.
Thor: Is it the lady? Lady Y/n who always asks you to cause chaos?
Loki: *grins*
Thor: LADY Y/N PLEASE STOP ASKING LOKI TO CAUSE CHAOS!
- Earth -
You: HOLY SHIT THAT LIGHTING SCARED ME
Y/n: Can we go now?
Thor, finishing breakfast: Once I retrieve Mjolnir from my rooms, we can leave-
Loki, strutting in: *flips Mjolnir in his hand* Sorry, you mean this?
Y/n: *falls out of your chair*
Tony, pouring coffee onto his hand: No. WAY.
Bruce: *chokes on toast*
Steve: *slams his newspaper onto the table* Seriously? Is EVERYONE worthy now??
Vision: *shrugs*
Loki: *cries with laughter* YOUR. FACES.
Loki: *Mjolnir disappears from his hand*
Thor: Wait... it’s not real?
Loki: Of COURSE it’s not real.
Thor, holding out his hand: *the real Mjolnir comes flying to him*
Thor: *places his hammer down* For a moment there, I was SURE...
Y/n: *looks between Mjolnir and Loki* You know...
Y/n, standing up: You should give it a try, Loki.
Loki: *scoffs* I will NOT ridicule myself in front of you lot.
Thor: Come now, Loki, you’ve proven yourself time and time again.
Loki, placing his hand on Mjolnir’s handle: You know what I think? You just want a good LAUGH.
Thor: I think you’re just scared.
Loki: Scared? Me?
Y/n: *nods* You’re DYING to know, you’re just too frightened to find out.
Loki, absentmindedly picks up Mjolnir: *uses it to point at you* YOU TAKE THAT BACK!
Y/n: *slowly raises your eyebrows*
Loki: As if I’d even CARE if I could pick up-
Loki, stares down at Mjolnir: -this worthless piece of...
Loki: *holds it higher* ... junk.
Loki:
Y/n:
The Avengers:
The world:
Thor: ...I KNEW IT.
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Taglist: @bluebunnlee @klanceiscannon14 @lokislilcaribbeanprincess @soulnoon @wildmoonstone @ironmaidenmidgardqueen @sociallyawkwardbeanwhowrites @hanyasnape @anti-socialish @peterman-spideyparker @iamverity @lilangeldevil006 @amyofasgard @riptstark @ejectur @thatspongebobkidmeme @emomemelordess @bluefrenchfries604 @jim-the-fallen-fan @lili-arwen @dragongirl642 @btsiguess-kpop @littleredstarfish @madisonlupin @burdenedwithglcriouspurpose @hellothedoctorisreal @shitilikeandstuff @sophie-barnes26 @electroma89
Thor, walking up to Loki: Brother, you’re supposed to be dancing!
Loki, staring at the Asgardians waltzing before him: *shrugs* I don’t want to.
Thor: Come on, Loki! It’s a party, your supposed to be enjoying yourself.
Loki: *glares at him*
Thor: *sighing* Just pick someone. *waves a hand* Anyone!
Loki: *scowling* I don’t WANT anyone. If you must know…I’m waiting.
Thor: Waiting for…?
Loki: Someone worthy of my time.
Y/n: *enters the room*
Thor: You can’t wait for-
Loki, spotting you: *pushes past Thor* Excuse me.
Loki, walking up to you: You know, they say that the true test of a perfect waltz is for it to be so swift, so delicate, and so smooth…
Loki, making a candle appear in his hand: …that a candle flame will not extinguish in the hand of the lead dancer.
Loki, gazing down at you: Now… that requires the perfect partner.
Loki, holding out his hand: Would you be mine?
Y/n, asleep: *hugs a pillow to your stomach*
Loki, stepping into the room: *slowly smiles*
Loki: *whispers to himself* My love, you look so peaceful...
Loki: *looks down at the pillow*
Loki: *quietly chuckles* ...and with that pillow against you, you appear as if you could be carrying a child...
Loki, sitting down beside you: Just imagine the kind of trouble a little you or me could cause...
Loki, smiling wider: It would be a whole new form of CHAOS, that’s for sure.
Loki: *places a gentle hand on the pillow* If we had a son...we could show him the nine realms, from the vast forests of Vanaheim, to the seven seas of Midgard.
Loki: *softly smiles* And if we had a daughter...we could read stories to her on warm, summer evenings and rainy afternoons... or sit out on a clear night and show her the stars...
Loki: *looks out the window* ... so that she’d know, even in the darkest of times, she would never be alone.
Loki, gazing down at you: I wonder...would she have your smile? Or mine? I do hope she’d have yours...
Loki: *voice cracking* Or maybe we’d have BOTH..and during bitterly cold winter nights and never ending storms, we could hold them close and... and keep them safe.
Loki: We could be a...
Loki: *takes a deep breath* ... well, a family.
Loki: *slowly shakes his head* By the norns, WHAT has come over me?
Loki, staring at his feet: I’ve FALLEN for you, y/n. I’ve fallen... and...
Loki: *looks back at you* ...and I don’t think I’ll EVER want to get back up.
Bruce, standing in the lobby of a hotel: *looks around* I have to admit, Tony picked a great place for us to stay.
Steve: *nods in agreement*
Tony, walking up to everyone holding a bunch of key cards: Alright, so, this place was booked to the brim…which means we’re going to have to share rooms.
Tony, starting to hand out cards: Cap, you can be with Clint. Bruce can be with me. And y/n…
Y/n: *frowns* What is it?
Tony: Since Thor isn’t here, would you mind being with… *points at Loki*
Y/n: *shrugs* Alright, fine.
Tony: … ok, there’s just one problem.
Y/n: *exasperated* What is it now?
Tony: I could only get a room with one bed.
Y/n and Loki: …
Y/n, grabbing a key card: *rolls eyes and walks to the elevators* This isn’t a 2012 fanfiction, Tony, we can be mature about this.
Loki: *looking at Tony* Do you understand-
Tony, shaking his head: Not a clue.
*later that night*
Y/n, curled up in Loki’s arms after sex: Aw fuck
Peter: okay Mx.Loki, if you had a gun with two bullets and you were in the room with Thanos, Odin and Hela who would you shoot?
Loki: I’d stab Thor. Twice. Then fake my death.
Thor: I wasn’t even one of the options??
Thor: You have a gun not a knife??
Thor: What do you mean 'fAke yOur dEatH'??
Loki: Hela can take care of Odin. I'd then stab you twice and then fake my death so I don't have to deal with Thanos.
Peter: [taking notes] go on...
Natasha: Is everyone ready to go?
Clint: Yea- wait where’s the little guy?
Peter, rushing in carrying a large bag: Ok SO just hear me out-
Tony: *holds up a hand* I’m going to stop you there.
Peter: But I haven’t even EXPLAINED-
Tony: If this is another one of your insane ideas, leave it.
Y/n: *steps up* I want to hear it.
Peter: THANK YOU. Ok, so you know how boring walking is, right?
Bruce: Um-
Peter: *slowly places a hand in his bag* Imagine how cool we’d look if we were wearing…
Peter: *takes out a pair of rollerskates from his bag* ROLLERSKATES!!!
Steve: *blinks*
Natasha: *looks at Clint*
Clint: *stares back at Nat*
Peter: *eagerly looks around at everyone*
Tony: Yea… how about no.
Peter: BUT-
Natasha: Maybe next time, Peter.
Peter, sadly dumping his roller skates on the floor: Okay…
Peter: *slowly walks out of the room*
Loki, picking up the discarded rolling skates: *looks towards you*
Y/n: Poor Pete.
Loki: Perhaps there’s a way to help him…
Y/n: Yea… you thinking what I’m thinking?
Loki: *slowly begins to grin*
*the next day*
Loki, zooming around the Avengers compound on roller skates: *nearly rams into Clint* Excuse me.
Clint: What the…
Y/n, also on roller skates: *flys past Steve* On your left…
Peter, happily skating alongside you and Loki: YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST.
Tony, walking into the room: What the HELL.
Peter, seeing Tony: *nearly skates straight into Loki* HI MR. STARK. THERE’S AN EXTRA PAIR OF SKATES ON THE TABLE IF YOU WANT TO JOIN IN.
Steve: *angrily looks at Tony* You gonna put a stop to this?
Tony: *sighs* No…
Tony: *walks towards the table*
Tony: *grabs the extra pair of rollerskates* If you can’t beat ‘em, join them.
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Taglist: @bluebunnlee @klanceiscannon14 @lokislilcaribbeanprincess @soulnoon @wildmoonstone @ironmaidenmidgardqueen @sociallyawkwardbeanwhowrites @hanyasnape @anti-socialish @peterman-spideyparker @iamverity @lilangeldevil006 @amyofasgard @riptstark @ejectur @thatspongebobkidmeme @emomemelordess @bluefrenchfries604 @jim-the-fallen-fan @lili-arwen @dragongirl642 @btsiguess-kpop @littleredstarfish @madisonlupin @burdenedwithglcriouspurpose @hellothedoctorisreal @shitilikeandstuff @sophie-barnes26 @btab66 @dearreaderme @marshyrebelcloud @eclecticlokibytomhiddleston @lokitty-is-my-spirit-animal @witch-of-sound @pinktrouble @xcastielbabyangelface @asgardianmarauders @student-dying-inside @gentaco @birdgirl90 @thiccyoshi @axerrrii @mishaandthebrits @daddysbutton0804 @tahliamalfoydepp