Major Character's Death - Tumblr Posts

What have I done !? || Bucky x reader one shot

Words: 1133

Warnings: major character's death, slight cursing, a lot of sadness & angst

SUMMARY: Bucky’s still in a shock after a misadventure, as a result of which Captain America has died. Reader's trying to comfort him, even when the fault is on Bucky’s side...

Author: Rouge

A/N: story has been written for the writing challenge made by @letsimagineitall

It was painful to see him like this. All you could do was embrace him and let the torrent of his tears to soak through your shirt. You could feel him clench his fists, not knowing whether to be mad or to give up hope all together. You could hear him silently screaming, suffocating with each breath he took holding onto his pride. You ran your fingers through his hair, time and time again, in an attempt to calm the silent war within his mind. "Everything's gonna be alright, Buck." You slowly stroked his muscular shoulder trying to comfort him as much as it was possible.

"Go away, Y/N!" Bucky pushed your hand away aa he rose from the couch and went apace to the huge window with a view on the city below. He leant his metal forearm against the glass and let out a loud sigh wiping his tears off. You hesitated. You weren't sure how will he react, when you will try to get close to him again. You good knew he was a ball of anger now. But you found a courage and slowly rose from the couch. You headed towards him. "Don't, Y/N." It sounded like an order, so you stopped immediately. "Bucky.. Darling..." "Shut your fucking mouth, Y/N!" Bucky yelled loudly and went out of the room. Instinctively, you've followed him. He slammed into the bathroom door. Bucky didn't care if you saw. He just broke down. The sobs punched through, ripping through his muscles, bones, and guts. Man pressed his forehead against the grimy stall door and began to let his heart yank in and out of his chest. His life crumbled in his fingertips. You weren't scared at that point. You knew you have to do everything. To calm him down. "Bucky" you mumbled quietly as you approached him. Your hand was placed on his nape where you stroked him. "Calm. Down. And talk with me." You were kinda surprised, when he didn't pull away from you. And when he sank onto his knees, you did same, embracing his shoulders. He sobbed into your chest unceasingly, hands clutching at your shirt. You held him in silence, rocking him slowly as his tears soaked your chest. A tiny lapse let him pull away, blinking lashes heavy with tears, before he collapsed again, his howls of misery worsening. The pain must have come in waves, minutes of sobbing broken apart by short pauses for recovering breaths, before hurling him back into the outstretched arms of his grief. "Hush, Buck... It wasn't your fault, darling" you said in the most mild tone you could ever make. "I wanna disappear" he whispered quietly as he breathed heavily. "You should be pretending you don't know me. You should stay away from me. I'm dangerous. It would be better if you would just erase me from your life, Y/N.." "I can't just forget you. That's not how it works" you told him unhesitatingly. He closed his eyes, his head has rested on your laps. As you were stroking his nape, you let your thoughts flow at ease.

Two days before was the saddest day ever. Bucky has killed Captain America. It was nothing more but a misadventure. Both men were on the mission to Serbia. There, they branch has been attacked by enemies. They were taken by surprise. Bucky managed to escape from under the firing. Of course, he was trying to come back for Steve. He found his pal, when Captain was attacked by heavily armed enemy soldier. Trying to help his friend, Bucky took the aim and shot. He was aiming to the foe. But the other one was much faster. Guy pulled Captain ahead, using him as a shield. The bullet went straight through Captain's chest, piercing his aorta. The second man disappeared, when the chaos has reigned. Bucky, being in panic and shock, was about to do something to save his friend. But it was too late…

 “B.. Buck…”

 “Hush.. Oh God, hush, Steve. You need to stay conscious. Do you hear me? Focus. Natasha!! For fuck’s sake! Quickly!”

 Steve choked with his own blood.

 “Oh God! Steve! STEVE! Motherfucker, don't ya dare to close those eyes!”

 Steve reached hand placing it in Bucky’s metal arm.

 “Don't…. D… Blame.. Yourself..”

 “Shut up, pal. You need to stay calm. Everything's gonna be alright!”

 Steve closed his eyes.

Bucky pressed the wound on his friend’s chest with his bionic hand.

 “No! No! No! Rogers, you old prick, don't do this to me!! Natasha!!! You fucking bitch, move your fucking ass up here! Steve's dying!”

 “Buck.. Cold.”

 Huge tears rolled over Bucky’s cheeks.

 “Steve. I beg you. Stay with me. You have to stay with me, brother. I won't make this without you! We’re brothers under the Sun.. Remember?”

 “Mmmmhmm… Ah.. ..It's burning..”

Captain's voice was nothing but a quiet whisper, although his lips seemed to not move at all.

 “Hush, Steve, I'm with you, pal.. Oh God, what I've done..”

 “...mmmmm.. I've… Accepted it.. Don't…. Buck… It… Feels… Like…….. Mmm.. Home..”

 “Steve?! Dear God!! Steven!?”

 Captain's chest stopped to move.

 “I won't forget you…” Bucky, trembling all over his body, reached with his metal fingers to Steve's eyes and he slowly closed them down. “You'll never be replaced… Forgive me..”

Captain America has passed away in Bucky's arms.

"I'm a monster. How can you even look at me?" his voice has broke down. "I'm a fucking murderer. It will be better if you will forget me. Forget us." "I won't." This time you hissed angrily. "You know I love you. No matter what. We are a couple. I'll be with you for good and for bad." He nuzzled to your knees. "Look. Imma mess. I've let all those people down.. I've let myself down. I've killed Captain. I've killed my friend.. I've murdered him..." You wanted to slap him in the face. He was pissing you out with blaming himself. It was an accident. And everyone knew it. "I will never leave your side. We're in this together." As you touched his yet wet cheek, he shivered under your touch. "Will.. You won't leave?" he raised his chin to look you in the eye. "Never. And I won't forget you. You're the best thing in my life." He nodded.

You woke up in the middle of the night after a terrifying nightmare. Instinctively and blindly, you touched the second part of your bed.

You let out a sigh of relief, when your hand rested on his bionic limb. He was there. He didn't run away. It was a sign. That he was trusting you. That was the most important. You knew a hard time was about to come. But you were prepared. Not only for yourself. Mostly for him.