Natalie Ouellette Headcanons - Tumblr Posts

Clockwork Headcanons

PT.01

Natalie Ouellettes past, upbringing, pre-murder headcanons.

CW: mentions of sexual abuse (I go into light detail about the abuse and the abusers mindset), domestic violence, gore, trauma, human experimentation

<NOTE> Same thing as the Ticci Toby headcanons, its a bit of a rewrite and I tried to keep the story realistic. Its not proofread so ignore typos and grammatical errors. Also again as a major warning, I went into some detail about Clockworks sexual trauma with her brother as I feel it does play a major part to her character and the reason why she developed the way she did. I have trigger warnings on the parts so you can skip it. Its very long because I have a lot of thoughts about her character. Enjoy 🔥

BIOGRAPHY .

PATIENT NAME: Natalie Ouellette

BIRTHDATE: November 6th, 1996

AGE: Currently 18 years old

HC/EC: Brown hair, green eyes

ETHNICITY: White Canadian

BIRTHPLACE: Windsor, Ontario

FAMILY: Mary-Beth Ouellette (mother), David Ouellette (father), Lucas Ouellette (brother)

DIAGNOSIS: Major Depressive Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, suspected/untreated Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD)

PIGTAILS .

Natalie grew up in a small trailer park. Her family was dirt broke, her father would blow all their money on booze and gambling

The financial situation in her household contributed significantly to her parents stress and fighting. Rarely was there ever a moment of peace

She would often make careless mistakes as any young child would like wetting the bed, drawing on walls, accidentally breaking things

And every time she made a mistake, she wasn’t simply taught how to do better, she was berated and ruthlessly beat by her father

Her childhood was unstable, to say the least. Natalies parents were more like enemies than they were caregivers.

She spent her peak developmental years being severely neglected and made to feel small and powerless.

At home she would spend her time alone in her room to hide away from the fighting between her parents or the random rants her drunken father would go on

She would get into the habit of running away just to spend some quiet time at the park by her house, anything to escape the chaos of her everyday life

At such a young age she didn’t know why she was so angry at the world. And at such a young age she would act out for attention and struggle with morals, empathy and societal norms as a result of never being taught any better

Her and her brother were severely emotionally neglected and grew up very poor, barely having food to eat or clean clothes to wear. This resulted to her being ostracized from her peers early on

DADDYS GIRL .

David Ouellette was a lazy, drunk, mean old man. He spent his life as a bully and would pick on anyone who challenged his authority, even his own children

He wasn’t afraid to use fear and violence to make his family obey. The man didn’t care who he hurt as long as he got his way

And this man regretted having children every single day of his life. He viewed them as burdens, a curse, and something he wasted his life on.

This included Natalie, who developed oppositional behavioural issues early on in defiance to her fathers abuse

Natalie had a mouth on her. She would talk back, make sarcastic or snarky remarks, boss other kids around. She would fight tooth and nail against her father for a sliver of power in her otherwise powerless life

And David hated being talked down to by a cocky brat like her. So over the years David would repeatedly beat his daughter into shape by grabbing her, hitting her with objects, slapping her, pushing and any other means to his ends of regaining control

Despite this strained relationship where the two would constantly fight for power, Natalie was a daddys girl. They developed a strange, twisted understanding in each other

David worked as a local trucker, but he ran a side hustle of repairing clocks. The man was a piece of shit and honestly a bit dumb when it came to booksmarts but he was good with his hands and a tinkerer

Her father was a classic trailer trash hick. He loved and owned guns, and would sometimes take his children out hunting. The only praise and a semblance of affection Natalie would receive from her father was when she was taking the life of another living being

MOMMY ISSUES .

Natalies mother was an unstable woman. She was very passive-aggressive and unpredictable in her parenting going from caring to cold in an instant

She was very controlling over her children, often resorting to berating and insulting Natalie to get her to act how she wanted

Mary-Beth spent her life chasing the teenage dream she never got when she was younger, and tried to project through her daughter

When she was a young child, Natalie learned quickly that her mother didn’t care about anybody but herself. Mary-Beth was a bitter woman, always playing the victim, and would die before ever admitting she was wrong

Even though her relationship with her father was bad, the girls relationship with her mother was worse. Davids abuse was in response to his children acting out of line, meanwhile her mother was unnecessarily critical, argumentative, and emotional

On multiple occasions her mother would leave the house in a dramatic fit as if she desired to be chased after. The woman would act out like a child and expect everyone to cater to her

And Natalie was never good enough for Mary-Beth. She wasn’t polite enough, smart enough, skinny enough. There was absolutely no pleasing her mother.

BLOOD BROTHER . (TW SEXUAL ABUSE MENTS)

The only person Natalie relied on in her life was her brother, Lucas. He was 4 and a half years older than her but it was that sort of quiet understanding between two children in such a hostile household

Despite their arguments and lack of true bond, the young girl felt safe with her older brother and always tried to impress him. All she wanted was the approval of some dominant figure in her life, and she certainly wasn’t getting it from her parents

Lucas was a strange boy. He was the anxious type who harboured a lot of internalized anger, especially towards his mother.

He was an outcast at school and similarly to his sister, he felt powerless in his life. The boy picked up on his mothers passive-aggressive traits and his fathers entitlement

As he grew and developed, so did his hunger for control and power. He wanted to degrade, assault, and dominate something in his life to make up for the lack of confidence

When Natalie was 9 years old, Lucas would begin to sexually abuse her.

The one person in her life that understood and felt the same pain she did turned on her. She was scared, ashamed, confused.

Repeatedly Lucas would approach his sister and assault her in various ways with little to no regard of the consequences or moral implications. He was desperate and even though it hurt her, it felt good to him.

BETRAYAL . (TW SEXUAL ABUSE MENTS)

Natalie was too young to even know what was happening to her, all she knew was that it felt bad and she felt violated. She knew something was wrong.

Soon enough, the girl felt she had no choice but to confide in her peers. One day at recess she approached a girl named Mia and her friends, a group of girls Natalie wasn’t really friends with but was acquainted enough to talk to

And from there she told them everything as best as she could, even if she got choked up and didn’t make much sense. The girl barely even made sense of it herself.

It felt lighter to get it off her chest, maybe if she could gain the courage to tell her parents the abuse would stop. Maybe everything was going to work out.

But the next day Natalie woke up to messages on sites like Facebook and MySpace. Degrading comments about her being an incest freak, a whore, gross, disgusting, weird, used. Who does that with their brother?

The bullying and degradation from her peers who now saw her as a disgusting weirdo would follow her up until high school

And for four years she would come home from school and be abused in the worst, most violating way by her own kin. And for four years she kept everything inside of her. She just kept quiet and didn’t dare to tell a soul ever again.

Eventually, she gained the courage to tell Lucas no, and firmly reject his advances. After that she was finally free, as much as a girl drowning in her own household could be.

DEAD GIRL .

In high school, Natalie did well for herself. Her grades were good, she calmed down a ton, and she didn’t bother making close friends but she got herself a boyfriend named Chris

Chris was a nice boy, but he came from a good, well-off family. He wasn’t the type to even begin to understand the things Natalie thought or had been through.

Throughout the years, Natalie had grown fond of things of the morbid nature. She would find herself drawing gorey images depicting murder, weapons, decomposing corpses, and other unsettling themes

This wouldn’t have been as bad if it wasn’t tied to the girl who was drawing it. Most people saw Natalie as a weird, disturbed girl and it was rather uncomfortable to watch a girl like her draw all these macabre things

On the outside she was quiet and asocial with a bit of an attitude. She was snarky and rough around the edges, but all she wanted for herself was to get a proper education and have a good life for herself. All she wanted was the kind of family Chris had

Deeper inside of her, Natalie was a very angry girl who hated the world. She hated her family, her life, she resented people who had it better than her.

There was so much bubbling inside that she just pushed down. She was never going to let herself crumble. She was never going to be weak.

This reflected negatively on her life which led to the girl growing into her behavioural issues. Natalie would talk back to authority figures in her life and god forbid anyone try to tell her what to do. She was rebellious to a fault

Her sleep schedule was barely existent as she would find herself staying up until the sunrise to finish assignments, scroll through the internet, or binge watch horror movies regularly

And this lack of sleep only contributed to her horrible attitude. The girl would get into fights at home, storm out, get into fights with her peers or her boyfriend, and go back home to start all over again

TIME .

Natalie had a strange relationship with the concept of time. It always seemed to be against her.

A part of her feared how little time she felt she had. It was like a race against the inevitable, it was going to catch up to her eventually. She couldn’t outrun time itself

It wasn’t long until there was something of obsession with the topic in Natalies life. Even clocks on the wall drove her insane

She felt as though she was stuck in a time loop of living the same day over and over. Different day on the calendar, but same life

Even her fathers clocks that littered her dirty, small, mobile home mocked her. Laughing at how powerless she was

The one thing in her life she truly could never control was the vicious cycle of living through her miserable days again and again

Wake up at 6am, school at 8am, go back home to the abuse at 4pm, fall asleep at 3am

Every. Single. Day.

Natalie hated her life more than anything. She wanted out more than anything. But she wasn’t going to be so weak as to self-harm or commit suicide. She was strong enough to take control

She just kept trying to be in control of something that couldn’t be controlled

STITCHES .

One day after school, Natalies boyfriend broke up with her.

She should’ve expected it, but she didn’t.

Chris was always nice to her, he really did try his best. But he just couldn’t even begin to understand her, and she couldn’t even begin to explain.

He told her that her outbursts were too much for him. She would snap at him and cause fights for such small reasons, everything set her off. And when he tried to talk it through with her, she’d shut down on him

Natalie never told him about the abuse, the trauma, or any of her struggles. She was drowning and never trusted a single hand reaching out to help

Chris made comments towards her art and mindset, saying it creeped him out and that she needed to seek professional help

Of course he didn’t understand. Nobody understood Natalie. The whole wide world was against her

And now the one person she actually liked and could see herself caring for turned on her and left her just like everyone else in her life

And another good thing in her life was lost to the hands of time

BORDERLINE .

For such a strong girl like Natalie, a stupid high school breakup shouldn’t have meant as much as it did

It shouldn’t have ruined her

But it did, and she was a mess

All she could think about was how much she lost. She was so desperate for control she completely lost it

And now her moods were at an all time low, her impulsivity skyrocketed and so did her anger

How fucking dare he do that to her

Natalie would start acting out, getting into fights with her parents, and her grades began to drop. Her entire life was slipping away through the cracks in between her fingers and there was nothing she could do but watch it crumble underneath her feet

It was like watching a car accident. You could see the girl spiral, you could see her crash and burn, but there was nothing you could do but sit back and watch

She didn’t care one bit. After so long of trying so hard to run from it all, she finally had nothing left to lose

So she picked up a few bad habits here and there. She would fight girls behind the school and buy cigarettes off of sketchy junkies with her parents money

Natalie started to speak up more and everything that came out of that girls mouth was trashy. She would make offensive comments and pick on people for being “so damn sensitive”

In reality, she just wanted to be seen. She wanted someone to catch her from falling so far deep into destruction and give her the attention and support she never had

But everyone found her annoying or just something to laugh at. Natalie wasn’t enjoyable to be around in the slightest

She started stealing booze from her parents and going off and getting drunk at the park near her house. The girl quickly developed a drinking problem that worsened her attitude even more

Natalie started crossing lines that shouldn’t have been crossed, and started to gain the dangerous knowledge that she could do all these awful things and the world wouldn’t come to an end

She was on top. She was powerful. And nobody was going to fuck with her again

INFIRMARY .

One night she got into a physical fight with her brother, things were broken, fists were thrown, insults were tossed back and forth

The fight had gone too far and she ended up injuring her left eye so badly she had to be taken to the emergency room

Nobody stayed by Natalies side in that hospital. She had to undergo surgery in order to remove the eye due to the damage. And neither her parents nor her brother cared enough to stay

Now around this time, the government was developed a chemical weapon known as “Liquid Hate” or “methcyclopyroxene oxydenate” if we’re going to get scientific

And if you know anything about the government, they just love to run illegal human experimentation programs on unassuming people who really wouldn’t be looked for if they went missing or worse

Natalie fell victim to a testing of an early prototype of liquid hate. During her surgery she was tied down and injected a small dosage of this chemical

Soon, she woke up and felt a jolt of adrenaline stronger than anything she’d ever felt before. It felt like her body was so hot she was going to explode, she felt jittery and like a surge of overwhelming energy soared through every cell that made up her being

And she felt so consumed by rage

Her anger was righteous and she was wielding it like an archangels sword. It was something so biblically primal when she escaped her restraints and ripped the nearest doctor apart with her own two hands

This quick blinding rush subdued slightly and she came to her senses as she caught her breath and bolted right out of the hospital in fear and out into the rainy night

The effects weren’t exactly as blinding as before but god knows they were still overtaking her senses. And when she walked down the street in that gentle, cold, rain only one thought was on her mind

Where the fuck was her family when she needed them the most?

TICK TOCK .

Now here was this angry, drugged up girl standing outside the dark house where she spent years of abuse and torment

And the blood on her hands was dripping like sin

When her mother answered the front door and saw the monster her own daughter had become, there was a part in the woman that felt as though she was looking at what she could’ve become

And like smashing a mirror, Natalie took the life of her own mother. She strangled her, brutally stabbed her with a kitchen knife and ripped open her ribcage with feral strength

As Natalie taunted the one who carried her for 9 months and brought her into the sick and cruel world she inhabited, she felt the rabid words fall off her mouth as if they had been begging to escape for years

Next was her father, who had slept through the death of his wife in a drunken slumber. The house stunk of alcohol - such a familiar smell. It made her sick to her stomach.

She snuck into her parents bedroom and took a handgun out of the bedstand drawer, shoving the barrel of the gun in her fathers booze-coated mouth and watched the fear filled his eyes as he woke up. Her finger teased the trigger as she whispered a quiet “your time is up, daddy” and blew his brains out onto the wall

This was another line Natalie crossed, another realization of her own capabilities only enhanced by the chemically induced beast-like rage. Nothing was stopping her. This was her divine right, she was in control now

And finally, she moved onto her brother who was alerted by the sound of a gunshot and walked in on his sister standing over their fathers dead corpse, blood staining her hands and soaking her white hospital gown

Lucas, like his sister, was a quiet boy who kept to himself for the most part. But like his sister, he had so much anger boiling inside of him and he was a fighter

And so the two fought once more, Lucas physically overpowered his sister for just a moment before something inside of her broke like a dam and the flood came crashing through

Natalie gained the upper hand as the fight was brought into Lucas’s bedroom, the place where her brother would abuse her for years

The overwhelming pain of the memories flooding in threw Natalie into a panicked fit as she threw her brother to the ground, ignoring his screams and berating

She climbed on top of him and incapacitated him by stabbing him several times in the abdomen, throat, and face. The girl finished her brother off by gutting him and spent her time mutilating his body like an animalistic rampage

Everything she had been bottling up finally exploded out of her and the girl showed no mercy that night

EMBERS .

Natalie stood in the bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror

She looked at the gaping hole where her left eye once was for what felt like eternity

Time came to a complete stop in that moment, it was all in the bloody palm of her hands

The only sound that filled the room was the viscous sound of her fathers pocket watch ticking softly as it rested on the messy bathroom counter

For nearly an hour she stood there heavily dissociated, zoning out of reality as she did nothing but stare at the hands of the clock moving rhythmically

Natalie soon snapped out of her dazed trance and slowly moved her dark crimson stained hand over to the pocket watch

And slowly she look a deep breath in as she brutally shoved the small clock into her empty eye socket, zoning out from the sharp pain of her body reacting to the foreign object

Now time was apart of her, and she was time itself. The girl became what she feared the most and broke the cycle she lives through over and over with her own two hands. She was no longer going to be a victim to the hands of time, she was now going to be the destroyer of it

As she exited the cold bathroom, she walked down the hallway of her small home she spent so much time in. There was no more yelling from her father, comments from her mother, fear from her brother

Natalie was all that was left

The girl entered her bedroom for the last time, changed into regular clothes and grabbed her stuffed giraffe shes had since she was a young child, named Jaffy

Jaffy had been with her through it all. She found comfort in the little giraffe, and it was the last piece of herself she had left

She walked into the kitchen with the stuffed animal and turned her gas-stove on max before laying a gentle kiss on Jaffys head and placing it onto the stovetop

Not once did she look back to the fire overtaking the giraffe as she walked out of that house, letting it become victim to the flames that would soon engulf the home

Natalie Ouellette died in that house, burning to death alongside her family in the fire

And only Clockwork walked out