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Crime sorciere sit com headcanons

AU where crime sorciere is one big family. Thanks to every one who liked and/or rebloged my original crime sorciere headcanons and it got up to 100 notes so here's kind of part 2/random au thing

-Jellal is the stressed single dad

-Meredy is the mischievous child who will climb the fridge to get to the cookie jar

-They lost her in the mall because she went into the itsugar store when they weren't looking

-Unfortunately this isn't the first time this has happened

-Sorano is the older sister who sneaks "showy" outfits in her backpack to school and changes in the bathroom when she gets there

-She's gotten many office referrals

-she also has a new boyfriend every week and Jellal yells for her to "keep the door open young lady!"

-Sawyer is the kid that's bed is a car. Everything is a car. He has hot wheels covering the floor so never go into his room barefoot

-it's like legos but worse

-Macbeth is the emo preteen who's whole wardrobe is from hot topic and just wants to sleep

-Poor things' tired okay

-Erik is the oldest and thinks he's above his little siblings and can't wait to go to college so he can get away from his family

-his headphones are on 24/7

-He also has a pet snake, 1 because he likes snakes, and 2 because it keeps Sorano out of his room

-Jellal doesn't know what he was thinking when he let Erik get a snake in the first place

-Richard is the weird uncle who lives in the basement and is trying to get his start with his poetry

-Richard is a pushover so when the kids want something they always ask uncle Richard first

-"can we have ice cream for lunch"

-"if it is your hearts desire then yes, follow through with your passion"

-"thanks uncle Richard!"

-Papa Jellal has a thing for the next door neighbor Erza

-Meredy notices and invites her over for dinner and Jellal almost has a stroke

-Then there's the next door neighbor Kagura who's had it out for Jellal ever since Sawyer broke her window with a baseball and tries to keep Erza from Jellal

-Meredy decided this was an act of war and "accidentally" dropped her ice cream on Kagura's shoes

-Jellal apologized profoundly and gave her money to pay for the damage

-Meredy was grounded

-So she bothers Erik since she's bored

-Erik walks out the door and Jellal found him hours later in subway on his phone

-Sorano sneaks out the house to go to a party and Sawyer saw her leave and she had to bribe him with a promise to get him some more hot wheels to keep him quiet

-Macbeth got his eyebrow pierced without Jellal's knowledge

-Jellal saw and just sighed and said "just don't let it get infected I can't deal with anymore of this shit"

-Meredy: "That's a bad language word!"

-Sawyer "Yeah put a quarter in the swear jar!"

-They have a swear jar

-Erik is the most constant victim of the swear jar

-Once the jar's full the money goes to Meredy's Girl Scout troop

-Meredy is a very passionate salesgirl

-"C'mon you know you want the thin mints, don't lie to yourself lady!"

-Sawyer always wins the fun run at his school

-Jelall's just glad at least once of his children has a future

*I feel like this should be a thing

^ Me when I fucking lie apparently

I wanted to get this done sooner but I had chores and work and shit so instead I stayed up until 5am drawing

Anyways

@acerobot GET FANARTED SUCKER

I drew the fucking BABIES and now I’m legally obligated to protect them forever until my inevitable death at the hands of their mom? Dad? Whatever the hell Bill is to them. The point is he’s going to kill me

I sure had a blast and I hope I have this much fun drawing all the other fankids on my fanart roster

Take Two

Me(Last post about this(: Talks about how Ford is aware of this false reality cause he literally got a metal implant in his head

Also Me(This post about this): Nah this is a memory alter/erasure situation cause it's more fun to play around with

So yeah! Send thoughts and prayers for a heavily mind-altered Ford I guess