Tf Therapy - Tumblr Posts

3 years ago

Post TF Therapy: Jack

“So. Tell me again. What brings you to my office today? You can be as honest or forthcoming as you’d like. I’m here to listen and not judge.” Dr. Chang said.

The calm intonation of the doctor’s voice put Jack at ease as he looked back at the mild mannered therapist before him and sighed. The wall behind Dr. C was filled with framed proof of the doctor’s accolades.

 “Dr. Evan Chang licensed TF therapist”, “Dr. Evan C, creator of TF acceptance method”, and “Dr. Chang, E in the TF Scientific Journal”

There was no doubt he was reputable, but Jack still found it difficult to open up. 

“Ok… well I’m Jack… I mean you know that. I… I guess. I’m still getting used to being… well the new me… still. I feel like people are staring all the time and I feel like an impostor every time I just try to act like me.”

The heat from the office was getting to Jack at this point and he undid his jacket revealing his huge arms strained against a thread-thin white shirt.

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The doctor nodded and did his best not to blush at the very masculine man showing off his body. “Well that’s often the case for individuals in your position. From what you briefly told me over the phone I know that this is definitely a big change for you. Not many people go from a mild mannered Caucasian in his mid 20s to a quite athletic African American bodybuilder overnight.” Dr. Chang remarked as he scribbled in his notes. “Do you care to recount the day leading up to it? And the event itself perhaps?”

With a nervous tug on his snug shirt Jack replied, “Um… ok. If you think it’ll help Dr. C.”

The doctor reacted with a warm smile. “I’ve found it helps to vocalize these issues. Both for my understanding and potentially your own processing of the situation.”

Jack gulped. “Alright. It was just a normal Friday. Doing some coding on my laptop when my mind wandered. I… was too nervous to talk to my co worker and ask him out on a date… so when I get too nervous I peruse certain websites… the transformation based ones. You know?”

“I’m familiar. Is this where the source of your change happened?” the doctor asked.

“If you can call him that. He’s more of a pain in my ass. Oh sorry. Can I cuss and stuff here?” Jack’s concerned expression and meek demeanor definitely seemed at odds with his appearance but the doctor just waived him on to proceed. 

“Well yeah he is. I think he was some sort of magic guy or demon… he messaged me online when I was reading a story. Told me he knew the kinds of things I liked… said he could help with that… asked if I was willing to do anything for my changes… I thought he was a hard core RP partner… honestly it was pretty hot at the time. I feel so stupid for even humoring him.”

“It’s not your fault. Beings like what you’ve described have existed long before the internet. The modern age just gives them a wider area to prey on people even at their lowest,” the doctor said, doing their best to reassure Jack.

With another sigh Jack continued. “After that we started talking. I’d say a few things I wished I could be.. taller, stronger, even a different race… Then he’d tell me in great detail how I’d change… how I’d feel the bones crunching as I grew. How I’d feel my muscles burn as they expanded… he was really right about that one. When it finally happened I thought I was dying… I was also turned on the whole time. Despite the pain, part of me reacted physically to that… it was kinda hot.” At this point Jack was blushing and avoiding eye contact with Dr. Chang.

“That’s an understandable physiological response. Even though it was causing you pain, you were still undergoing a change you’ve always wanted. Not to mention your body was working overtime to accommodate those changes. Adrenaline, testosterone, and quite a lot more were briefly maximized in your body quite quickly. It’s alright that you felt that way.”

“Thanks doc… anyway it didn’t take long for me to explore my body. At this point I was practically flexing out of the torn remains of my shirt. I think I came nearly 5 more times after just getting nude. It was all so amazing at first, till I realized what had gone wrong… the RP we did had me exchange some of my skills with programming and my high IQ for this new body… and it had come true. I had to anonymously quit my job and move to a more affordable part of town. If it wasn’t for your payment plan I don’t think I’d be able to afford coming to see you Dr. Chang.”

The doctor smiled. “I do my best to accommodate all of my patients. Many people find themselves in hard times after they’ve changed. Forging a new identity isn’t cheap especially when you lose the ability that helped provide for your income.”

“Yeah that was quite a change. I wasn’t dumb. I mean I’m not dumb now. I’m still pretty smart, but I just had to find a job that didn’t ask too many questions or need a valid ID for a bit. I tried construction at first. It was pretty great using these big muscles to build heavy things all day, but if I’m honest that’s not for me. I’m more of an indoor guy and I didn’t make many friends on the job. Luckily when I started working out at one of the nearby gyms, the manager asked if I wanted to be a trainer! I was… very enamored with strength and fitness training… from a tf perspective. So I knew a little already… I kinda faked it till I made it as one of their trainers. And here I am today.”

Dr. Chang nodded encouragingly. “That’s wonderful to hear. It sounds like you’ve adapted quite well to your new situation. Are you enjoying your work at the gym?”

“Actually yeah. I’m kinda getting all the attention I wish I had before the change! It’s really fun to flex and show off a bit and people love it! But… that’s also where the problem is… why I came to see you.. I… don’t know how to act around people…”

“Can you elaborate? Do you feel like you’re experiencing social anxiety?”

“No… I mean I don’t think so… I’m just nervous when I act certain ways around people. I feel like I’m just pretending to be someone I’m not… like I didn’t earn this body, but people are constantly complimenting me on my gains. I’m the biggest guy in the gym most days, both in height and muscle. But I didn’t spend years making this body like I say I did. Plus there’s the whole race thing. Sometimes I feel like I’m talking a certain way or behaving a certain way and think ‘Oh. I’m just doing this because I think black people act like this.’ It’s like my inner monologue makes me feel like I’m acting on stereotypes. Which I don’t know, maybe I am. I made a big dick joke in the locker rooms and everyone laughed. But I feel guilty… like am I really black now? If so, am I black enough? Should I be participating more in black culture stuff!? Am I really a true jock too? Should I be doing more than just working out at the gym, like play basketball? I mean I love my new body, but it’s got me so confused.”

“Jack! Jack! It’s alright.” the doctor said calming him down. “You may find this comforting, but even outside of the tf community, these feelings are exhibited by many people. We live in a time where people of all kinds can choose to express themselves in countless ways. You’re not the only black man, wondering if he’s ‘black enough’ or the only athletic man who doesn’t want to participate in sports culture. If we’re speaking from a biological perspective, yes you are an African American man now. According to your medical records your body has changed at a cellular level and any biological trace of the old you is no more. However biology is just one of many factors that make up who you are. If you’d like to participate in a more black experience or get to know what life is like for other black people, there are cultural community groups that exist. Similarly if you want to start exerting yourself in athletics or keep up with sports you’re welcome to do so. The important thing to remember is you’ve got the freedom to choose. It doesn’t sound like you’re acting on racist preconceptions or arrogant jock behaviors, so I’m quite proud of how you’ve acclimated to your circumstances.”

“Wow… uh thanks doc. I… that feels good just to get off my chest… it’s nice to know I’m not alone in this. You know. At first I thought the hardest part of this would be finding clothes that fit this big body…”

Both laughed as Dr. Chang said, “Well I can understand that. You’ve got quite the imposing frame. All of those hours at the gym seem to have paid off. You’re doing an excellent job maintaining your physique post tf. Some find it too daunting and simply let go of any physical gain they received from their transformation… Well that looks like all the time we have for today. I look forward to seeing you next week to talk more, if you’re interested.”

“I am! Thanks Dr. Chang. I’ll catch you later… I think I’m gonna like therapy.” Jack said as he strides more confidently out of the room.

-

Dr. Evan’s Chang’s Notes on patient: Jack Everly 

(Former stats marked by paranthesis)

Age: (22) 30

Height: (5′7) 6′4

Race: (Caucasian) Black

Patient exhibits a promising acceptance to his transformation and appears to be integrating well into society. Patient shows no signs of revenge fantasies, power trips, or substance abuse coping mechanisms. Prognosis: Generalized Anxiety

Additional sessions likely could assist. No pharmaceutical recommendations at this time. 

Unfortunately no further info gained on entity that caused the change. Should further communication continue between them, will have to report this information to the authorities. 

Current status: I believe Jack to be safe for now and not subject to more changes. Shows no sign of Addictive Transformation Syndrome and will likely not seek out traditional means of tf (cursed objects, wishes on falling stars, pacts with otherworldly beings). 


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3 years ago

TF Therapy: Anzu

TF Therapy: Anzu

With one hefty grunt, Anzu dropped the weights as they clanged to the ground. All the other guys around him quickly scattered. No one wanted to be next to this guy when he was in a bad mood. The patrons of the gym noticed that every Monday after an incredibly intense session, the “big guy” of the gym would finish up and the shake the floor as he stormed out. Wherever he was going, no one wanted to get in the way.

-

“Oh no! I’m late! I hope Dr.  C won’t be mad.” Anzu mumbled to himself, his bass tones going unheard by the patrons of the gym as he passed them. Most assumed Anzu was grumbling something to himself, but in fact this big beast of a man was just a nervous wreck whenever he was late to his therapy appointments.

A few minutes later and a whole list of apologies to the receptionist for breaking the automatic doors, Anzu was greeted by Dr.  Eric Chang. 

“Only 5 minutes late this time,” the doctor teased. “Either you’re getting more punctual, or your legs are getting stronger.” 

The two laughed. They’d been at this for the last 4 years since Anzu’s change first happened. The rapport they’ve built up certainly allowed these kinds of jokes. 

“Thanks for always keeping your doors open Dr. C! I really did try not to be late this time. You know how it is when I get a good pump going. I hit a new PR today! All the guys at the gym were TOTALLY jealous.” Anzu giggled to himself. 

“Well congratulations. I have to say I’m still quite proud of the progress you’ve made, both physically and emotionally to your body. I know it wasn’t always easy to show off your cheery disposition initially, nor was your first journey into the gym your body was a regular at. But you’ve improved in spades in the last 4 years.” Dr. Chang assured the beaming brute of a man in front of him. 

Anzu was just smiling. Even before the events of his big  change Anzu was always found smiling. That fateful day where Anzu and her mom were walking home from her gymnastics performance, holding first place trophies would be a moment she’d never forget. She was just a petite teenage girl, happy to be the first Japanese American student at her school to bring home first place in their small town. 

“Well the last 4 years had been a rough one, but you really helped me through all of it Dr. C. I’ve come to terms with being a victim of that body swap bomb by that gym. And honestly? I know I said I hated it at first, but these days I absolutely LOVE my new body! Remember how much I was complaining back then? I was a total mess!” Anzu said recounting dramatically her many emotional breakdowns. Everything from the original freak out when she saw how huge she was to the eventual meeting reintroduction to her family.

Eric gave a wry smile at this as he remembered vividly exactly what she was talking about. “But I’m so hairy And smelly all the time!”, “I can’t even fit into my cute shoes anymore!”, and “What boy is going to want to date a 40 year old meat head!” with other such similar quotes came rushing back. Back then Anzu was not doing well. Going from a petite gymnast to an aspiring middle age bodybuilder was certainly one of the more drastic changes Dr. Chang had ever helped council an individual through. The memory of holding a man over a foot taller than his lean frame as he cried nearly the entire session would be a session he’d never forget. One of the only things Anzu liked about the new body at first was its massive height, which Eric soon learned to bring up to cheer her up occassionally.

TF Therapy: Anzu

“And remember that time I kept trying to shave my beard? I mean sure I’ve let it grow now! But oh boy, I had so many paper towels on my face! But anyway I’ve got a huge issue!!! I’m feeling all those old icky sensations I used to. Like me getting all self conscious and stuff… Can we talk about that today?” Anzu asked.

“Of course Anzu, the floor is yours. What would you like to talk about?”

“Well… you know how I decided to go back to school last year? Like I know I’m not getting any gymnastics scholarships anymore, but I like made enough money at the warehouse to start night classes! The guys over there think I’m only smart enough to lift, but I’m showing them! Anyway… there’s this really cute grad student that works with the professor. He’s like this really handsome and cute Korean guy. Think, all the members of BTS rolled into one handsome Teacher’s Assistant! The way he smiles at me when he helps me with assignments just melts my heart! He likes makes me so nervous though… like seeing him and thinking about like him asking me out makes me blush so much. And then when I get flustered I get nervous and I start to sweat! And I’ve gotten used to that smell and actually kinda like it but I’m not sure if he thinks I stink and-”

“Anzu… one step at a time. First breathe, then think about what you want to say, and then explain it to me.” After a few moments pass Dr. Change asks, “So given your excitement, I imagine you find this young man attractive and would like to date him after this semester ends, correct?”

With a slow nod, Anzu smiles again tentatively. “He’s like so dreamy! But you know… I’m scared about what he’s gonna think about me… like I know he like guys AND girls… I’ve uh.. seen him on all the dating apps saying as much… but I haven’t… you know… dated anyone since before the incident… and that was in high school. Like… I kinda hate it. I’ve been so good since then and the one man comes along and makes me feel like I’m not good enough all of a sudden. Like who does he think he is!?”

“Again, Anzu. I’m going to ask we not make assumptions about this person before you’ve even asked him out on a date.” Dr Chang said, sighing. It was exhausting at times to keep up with Anzu.

However, rather than the notorious combative energy Anzu had when he was wrong, the face and demeanor quickly shifted to reserved and scared. “I… like. I know that. It’s… just sometimes I want it like it could’ve been… I want the handsome TA to  reach out to me and ask me for coffee and comment on my clothes. I want people to look at us and say how cute!.. I know I’m different… but I still wish I could have the things I’d always dreamed about… and since he’s so perfect… and like actually might like me as a guy… I just… I thought I was over all of this stuff… but it doesn’t take much to make me feel like an old hairy man who no one will love.” With that the tears came pouring out. A well placed tissue box helped cover most of the damage, but Eric knew it would take a lot more to fully dry off Anzu’s beard once a full cry was complete.

“Whew… ok. Well Anzu, I know it’s been awhile since you’ve felt these insecurities. And I’m glad you reached out with this info rather than bottling it up. Now that we’ve calmed down a bit and knowing how you never give up on things even when its hard, tell me. What do you plan to do? Keep in mind our previous exercises and your own self worth.”

With a deep breath Anzu said, “I… am a beautiful man who is going to ask out Minh, the handsome T.A. If he says no, that is in no way a testament to my character or my personality. I am an awesome person who never gives up and has worked this body really well to get huge muscles!”

“Well then I think you know what you’ve got to do. I look forward to hearing how things go next week once classes are over. As usual Anzu you’ve done most of the heavy lifting in these sessions Anzu. Guess you’re just no stranger to heavy lifting these days.” Dr. Chang smirks as he pats Anzu’s large arm. 

“Thanks Dr. C! I feel much better after these sessions. I’d hug you real tight if that was allowed still!” Anzu said with a fickle laugh. 

“Of course… you know though. Patient… doctor… boundaries and all…” Eric chuckled guiltily, knowing full well the motivation for this was to not be crushed by the over enthusiastic bodybuilder. “In any case, would you like to sit in the waiting room for a bit? The weather outside is getting quite rainy, wouldn’t want you to catch a cold.”

“Nah, that’s ok. Mom is coming to pick me up and- oh she just texted me! She’s here!” 

Outside the two saw a very nice car pull up to the doorway and the handsome visage of Mrs. Reika could be seen coming out.

Though rarely mentioned Dr. Chang was proud of how well Anzu’s mother had transitioned from mild mannered housewife to handsome male model. 

TF Therapy: Anzu

The suit he was wearing, clung to his form bravely, having just a built enough body to show off yet still having clothes that fit. A problem that Anzu would perpetually encounter.

“Alright, thanks for another great session Dr. C! Bye!! Hey mom! Thanks for coming!… Oh my gosh! Fine! I won’t hug you and get your suit all wrinkly…. You’re making it up to me later at the gym when you spot me!”

With that the two drove off leaving Eric once again with his notes. 

-

Dr. Evan’s Chang’s Notes on (former) patient: Jaime Rodriguez Jr.

(Former stats marked by paranthesis)

Age: (20) 44

Height: (5′1) 6′5

Race: (Japanese) Arab

Weight: (98lbs) 290lbs - 131 kg

Continual meetings with patient prove to be beneficial for self - esteem issues. Subject is quite forthcoming with information, leading to perfect individual to study for longitudinal effects of body swap bomb survival. Original theory that long term swap acceptance, leading to personality shifts proved incorrect as much of the original Anzu shines through regardless of the scenario. However, the natural abilities associated with muscle memory were shown to be one successfully transferred attribute. Unknown if sexuality was at all effected by the swap, as both Anzu and Sayed Ibrahim, were attracted to men pre and post swap. Further complicated by the  fact that they both were attracted to “pretty boys”.

Given the reduction in frequency of degradation of transformation based mental issues, will likely recommend a termination to therapy once subject is situated in a new relationship. 

Note to self: Determine if Anzu learns that Minh is also a victim of a body swap bomb.


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3 years ago

TF Therapy: Jamie

“Come on Dr. Chang, do I have to do this now?” Jaime protested looking sullen. He hated having to share a recap of how the last week went EVERY week.

“Yes Mr. Rodriguez. I know you hate having to explain yourself every week, but I need to understand how you are adapting to your new family dynamic.” Dr. Evan Chang replied calmly.

“Gah! Please don’t call me Mr. Rodriguez! That’s literally my dad! Not me! It’s hard enough being in his body. Please just call me Jaime.” The once young man ran his hand through his graying hair and sighed.

image

“Alright. Well Jaime, can you please tell me how you and your father are adapting to your new situation? For example, how was the move? How is your new job at the hardware store going?”

With a reluctant huff Jaime replied. “It’s going good… I guess! The move was fine. Even though dad had me drive most of the way. The new house is smaller than our old one, but all the stuff works at least. I’m… glad they let me keep my Switch. Gaming is still fun to me at least… The job is cool. It’s a lot different than my other job at the mall last year, but it’s also kind of the same. The mental stuff… like my dad’s skills and things are coming to me easier. I know all about construction and building. I even answered this young couple’s question about building a front porch swing…Gosh and I keep calling people young and stuff! I hate it!”

The doctor continued to take notes before looking up at Jaime. “Interesting. Well it’s not uncommon for these skills to transition given the way your change happened. Mystical artifacts, wishes on old carnival machines, and even waking up in alternate worlds often all have the same side effect of… assisting with the transition in various ways.”

“Well I didn’t ask for that stupid crystal jar’s help. Stupid dad bringing it home. How was I supposed to know that one dumb wish was all it took. All I said was that I wish he could understand college life better. I knew he didn’t want me going too far from home and I wasn’t! But that doesn’t mean I couldn’t dream of transferring one day!” Jaime’s anger grew recalling the events of his change a few weeks ago. He clenched his hands and noticed how his biceps naturally tensed and grew.

“Alright Jaime. Remember what we discussed. Breathe. Think. It’s alright to be angry, it’s okay to be sad. But you have to feel these emotions, not let them dictate your actions.” Dr. Chang said. 

“I know!  I know… I’m sorry. It just feels like a bad memory that won’t go away… It started out good… you know. When I thought it was temporary. Here I am, finally getting to have that growth spurt I wanted.. finally getting muscles I envied from my dad. It was like ‘Now who is too small for sports!’ and I was like happy for a bit.” Jaime trailed off wistfully, but still gripped his leg as if by reflex.

TF Therapy: Jamie

The doctor nodded encouragingly. “That’s a very typical response. Some sons grow taller than their dads naturally. You just happened to have an early start. And judging by how you’ve walked in, you seem to be adapting to your new body very well.”

“Really? You think so? Sometimes it feels like I’m just pretending to be this adult. I mean I know I’m already 18, and that is what I am already, but I mean… it’s hard to explain.”

Dr. Chang smiled at Jaime. “You’ll be happy to know that many individuals who transition from adolescence to adulthood experience that same thing. You are around the age when a lot of people are establishing their identity, learning their preferences, and figuring out how they want to act.”

“I wanted to figure that all out in college. Even if it wasn’t my first choice I would’ve done it there!” Jaime said feeling angry again.

Dr. Chang squinted for a second and then decided to try an unconventional approach. “Is that why you have barely mentioned your father in your sessions? I’m aware your new placement has him attending the local state college. I imagine that must be difficult for you to see him in that sort of environment.”

“Of course it is! That was supposed to be me! Now there he goes in my old body just going to school. And he’s doing really good there! Plus he’s starting to workout in my body and making friends and having fun and and and… I’m jealous. All the things he wanted me to have… he gets it now and I just have to watch. I don’t even like watching anime anymore… he took that too… I’m… afraid he’s just gonna take everything else… but it’s not like he’s being mean about it. He’s really kind and takes care of me still… makes dinner… asks how my day was… I’m just so angry all the time… just like he was after a long day of work. I hate it.”

Jaime heard the doctor put his notes down. “I’m sorry to hear that parts of his temperament seemed to have stayed in that body. I’m also sorry that you no longer have the same prospects as you were expecting. I’d like to say that this is all something that is going to take some getting used to. However, I don’t want to understate the gravity of the situation. Yes, that artifact caused you to swap bodies with your dad, but it has done more than that. Further research into it has shown that the artifact is still active meaning its effect on you and your dad seem to not be done yet.”

The confused patient looked at Dr. Chang. “What do you mean? I thought switching our bodies was the whole wish?”

“It’s possible it was. However, given how you’ve behaved in my last sessions I would postulate that perhaps it was simply the beginning. You have taken more of your dad’s characteristics like temperment. Not only that you seem to have a more powerful build than your father once had.”

Jaime was speechless. He hadn’t realized it but his dad’s clothes had seemed tighter. All those moments flexing in the mirror, seem to make a lot more sense now. Same for his new found self assuredness at his job.

“Not only that,” the doctor continued, “But you’ve commented on how he’s seemlessly transitioning into college life. Well that could be from your wish for him to understand college better. To me he’s acting like a new student enjoying college and is having fun, while you’re becoming a strengthened and more confident version of your father.”

“He did wish I was stronger and could understand life better…”Jaime trailed off. “So I’m gonna keep changing and acting different? Will I even be me afterwards? I’ve got to be honest Dr. Chang coming here and talking about this stuff is just making me feel worse and worse.” Jaime looked down glumly.

“I’m glad you felt open enough to share that with me Jaime. Honestly your situation is a bit out of the ordinary. I typically work with individuals who are completed with their transformation… If I may. I’ve got a suggestion you may like as an alternative. It combines a… therapeutic aspect of saying your issues, but puts you in touch with people who have gone through changes similar to yourself. How would you feel about trying a support group for other guys who found themselves growing older and bigger?”

2 months later

“You’ve reached the voice mail of Dr. ERIC CHANG. I cannot come to the phone at the moment, but if you leave your name and number I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.” BEEP

“Hey Dr. Chang. It’s Jaime. I just wanted to send you a monthly check up message. Support Group has been great! Hearing all the amazing stories that guys like me have been through, growing up, having to take new responsibilities, adjusting to whole new realities! Can’t believe I’m the shortest guy there, but I’m definitely not the scrawniest! It’s all so great. Thanks for recommending me for the program.  If you every need anything at lawn or construction equipment just find me at the store! Jr. Is doing well too. I call him Jr. in public now since it makes more sense. He’s enjoying college life and well… I’m happy for him. I warn him not to party too hard and to stay safe so he knows I mean well. As for me I’ve been going to a local gym to see how much I could push this changing body! And well I’ll send you a picture after this, but I’ve definitely improved. Anyway me and the other guys from group are gonna meet for some drinks. I’ve really embraced my new life. Sorry therapy didn’t work out like you thought, but I’m doing much better.”

TF Therapy: Jamie

Dr. Evan’s Chang’s Notes on (former) patient: Jaime Rodriguez Jr.

(Former stats marked by paranthesis)

Age: (18) 49

Height: (5′10) 6′2

Patient exhibited a noncompatible mindset for therapy. Likely a result of communicating his transition to a mature adult life to an adult caused some dissonance. Recommend for group therapy and seems to be thriving in new environment. Previous symptoms showed a mixture of involuntary personality and ability transference. Subject seems to have maintained interest for video games, spicy foods, and technology. 

Former father Jaime Rodriguez Sr. seems to have thrived. While not my patient seems to be adapting to life as an 18 year old seamlessly with little to no counselling needed. Reminder to contact both to complete longitudinal study for swapped case study. 

Crystal artifact recovered has finally powered down, meaning likely no further changes for either individual. Unfortunately this artifact no longer shows sign of exhibiting mystical energy after it completed the wish. Will be archived in the Vault for long term storage. 


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2 years ago

TF Therapy: Ivan

TF Therapy: Ivan

“Walking has helped… I guess.  After everything that’s happened, I can at least say the weather has been nice. Spring is right around the corner.” Ivan says adjusting his glasses. Though optimistic in wording, the tone Ivan conveyed still felt more somber. 

Dr. Eric Chang nods, taking note of this. “Well exercise of any caliber can assist in many aspects of mental health. I’m glad you remembered that from out last session. However, I’m guessing you’re still feeling a bit out of sorts. Might I ask if you have anything specific on your mind?”

Ivan let out a long sigh as he looked down at his body. Large firm pecs centered between two powerful arms that were even bigger when flexed. A set of abs beside a tattoo he never even got. “It’s just the guilt doctor…I know that every time I walk down the street, talk to a person, or even look in the mirror… I’m just using something that doesn’t belong to me. I didn’t workout to get these muscles. I didn’t feel the pain getting this tattoo. I didn’t spend the hours needed to become a male model. I’m just using a collection of stolen parts… and I feel terrible.”

The doctor nodded solemnly placing his pencil and paper down. “I appreciate the self awareness you have to the scenario you are in Ivan. However, I fear you’re mistaken at a few parts. Namely. You did not steal anything. Let me ask you. Were you the one that created that myserious fog that passed through your small town?”

Ivan shook his head no.

“And were you the one that selected Mr. Bromare’s musculature to be added to your form?”

Ivan shook his head again.

“Or Mr. Mendacina’s racial features? Or Angelo Vera’s facial structure?”

“No…” Ivan replied tiredly.

“Correct. The legal definition for theft is the taking of another person’s property with the intent of depriving that person of it. You lack the intention behind such a crime. So I’ll ask that you not refer to yourself as a thief.” Dr. Chang requests.

A brief nod escapes Ivan’s head as he continues to look down and not meet the doctor’s eyes.

“Can you help me understand why you feel these moments of guilt? I understand that you experienced  body dysphoria issues and a frustration with weight loss. Are these feelings grounded in fear? Insecurity?”

Ivan shrugs his broad shoulders. “I… I don’t know Doctor Chang. I don’t understand it all that well myself I guess. I feel guilty that I got all these good qualities for one. I know the people who examined me said the traits that were swapped between all the people were random, but I feel bad being one of the only lucky ones here. Not only that, the doctors tell me that these changes are permanent. Not just irreversible but permanent. So no matter how much I eat or don’t workout I’ll still have this same general form. Same goes for the others who can’t build their bodies back to what they once were. And here I am just reaping the benefits and i don’t deserve any of this. None of us do…”

“Thank you for sharing all of this with me Ivan. Changes as drastic as yours certainly carry their fair share of traumatic episodes. And the sensations you describe are very akin to survivor’s guilt… with another exception. All the people who were involved in the Trait Storm are still alive. Yes. Many of their standards of livings have changed. Yes we had to move everyone from your town to different cities to assist with a decontamination of the area.  But no one was physically hurt by the exchanging of traits and attributes. I can assure you many I have mentioned today are seeking out therapy, while others are simply adapting to their new lives. The burden of responsibility here does not lie with you or your guilt, but of the individuals responsible. This is all to say the internal struggles many like yourself are going through, do not fall on your shoulders. Your feelings of guilt and inadequacy don’t serve them or any form of penance.”

The young man nods. “I… guess that makes sense… Logically I know it makes sense. I still can’t get the feelings to go away. And I hate myself for that. Like I hate myself and feel guilty and then I also hate myself for feeling guilty.”

Eric smiles. “As mentioned before, I appreciate your self awareness in this regard. That gives us a good starting point on how to approach your issue. Negative self talk can be a harmful and persistent challenge many face even out side of TF Therapy. However, there are a multitude of ways to tackle it. Mindfulness, meditation, and self-compassion. We actually have an entire book that covers self talk and how we communicate with ourselves. Would that be something you were interested in looking into?”

“I… I think it would be thank you.” Ivan says as Dr. Chang hands him a book. He takes a minute to read through its pages and survey all the relateable anecdotes. And after a few minutes of reading stories with accompanied exercises he smiles, and nods more.

“Thank you Dr. Chang… can I keep this? It’ll be nice to read… I found a good place to read outside at the park I’ve been walking to. I can return it and-”

“By all means Ivan. Keep it. I’m glad I can help. Now. We only have a few more minutes left, is there anything else you’d like to discuss?”

Ivan’s disposition shifts again. Looking less sad and more embarrassed. “Well… it’s not as big as the other stuff. But I still feel… weird about it… I was seeing someone before the Trait Storm. His name was Larson Price. Well… they recently allowed intercommunication between people we once knew… and… well he was telling me about some of his changes. He got a little taller, finally got that beard he wanted to grow, and even got a deeper voice… However, he said that when he saw a picture of the new me… he wasn’t… attracted to it. We think maybe his sexuality shifted? Is that a thing for these kinds of changes? The doctor only told us about physical changes nothing like this… can… will we? I mean do we have a chance?”

Eric paused for a second. He knew all too well the struggles of trying to maintain a relationship after one’s sexuality was altered. Before he could respond a small alarm went off.

“I’m sorry Ivan. I don’t know much on the subject of the Trait Storm effecting sexuality. I’ll be sure to research this topic and next week we can discuss more. Does that sound alright?”

“Of course. Thanks again Dr. Chang. I’ll see you next week.”

The two waved goodbye as Eric sighed. He hated lying to his patients. 

-

Dr. Evan’s Chang’s Notes on patient: Ivan Antonova

Age:(32) 32

Height: (5′9) 6′2

Weight (190lbs) 225lbs

Race: (Caucasian) Mixed South American and South Asian

Patient  appears to experience issues regarding self esteem manifesting in guilt and negative mindsets. Severity unknown at this time, but strong likelihood for a non pharmaceutical approach. Prognosis: high chance of recovery and coping. 

I’m hoping my expressions didn’t betray me when discussing significant others and sexuality changes. With any luck and further studies I can put my own personal problems to rest on this matter and hopefully help others along the way. If that is the case, then my time working for this agency may be coming to a close. I wonder if this is the right thing to do. I have a responsibility to my patients as well as the future individuals I can help… but I also have a responsibility to me and to my own life/happiness… I’ll consider all angles before I act.


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2 years ago

TF Therapy: Retirement (Chris Part 2)

TF Therapy: Retirement (Chris Part 2)

Sequel to TF Therapy: Chris

“So….how do you feel… it’s a bit larger than what you’re accustomed to… I imagine… no shortness of breath or muscle soreness or-”

“I’m fine Eric. More than fine now that… well now that I feel more like me.. I don’t know how I could repay you for any of this… I feel… free.”

The two stared at each other, unable to look away. A sweet silence they were unable to share before. 

“How about you start driving and I’ll come up with a way later… big guy”

Chris smiled and drove off as quickly as he could.

- 12 hours earlier -

The pleasant morning breeze felt nice against Chris’ muscles. He was mid warmup when he heard footsteps approaching the front door. 

Soon, there was a knock and he had to set himself down from his impromptu workout when he saw Eric, eagerly waiting.

TF Therapy: Retirement (Chris Part 2)

He lands with a powerful spry jump and walks over to Dr. Eric Chang.

“Hey there! You’re uh- early. I was just finishing up a workout. Can I get you some water or anything? Sorry about the sweat. I’ll towel off real quick” Chris says embarrassed as he wipes off the sweat with a fancy embroidered towel with the name “Evans” on it. 

“Thank you Chris. I’m fine at the moment. Apologies for the early arrival, but I wanted to get started as soon as possible today… there’s a lot to discuss. Shall we?” The doctor asked as they walked through the large halls of the mansion.

“Yeah of course. Right over here. This is my private study. Unlike my other bodies, I don’t have a significant other right now who can walk in on us.” Chris says looking as if humor was his only option to Eric’s serious tone.

“That’s one of the reasons I asked to reschedule before your next jump. First things first, in your own words do you think your situation has changed at all? Any abnormalities in who and how often?” The doctor inquired getting right to business.

“No. Not really. Same scenarios keep happening. I jump from bodies to the various famous Chris’ that keep popping up. Still primarily Chris Hemsworth and Evans. Variations with Chris Pine, and that one time with Chris Bumstead, but mostly the Hollywood based Chris’es. Unfortunately they’re all painfully… you know. Liking women…” Chris admitted.

“And… on the subject of sexuality.. are you… alright with the… acclimation into each of your lives… have you… explored your heterosexuality outside of… the individual bodies you find are already in committed relationships?” The doctor nervously asked, clenching his fist at the potential answers.

“I… well… I certainly perform normally when it comes to married life. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to dealing with multiple families and lives… but the sex… yes that still happens… but when it comes to Chris Evans… no. I haven’t really explored sexually outside of masturbation… I know you encourage honesty for these but… well… I hope you don’t mind me saying… I do miss you… Eric… We… can strike that from your recordings… if you’d like.” Chris said looking embarassed.

The two looked at each other for a moment and Eric gulped. “I know… and I’m really sorry about that Chris. If I’m being honest I know you did all this for me… and you’re paying for something you never needed to do… I’m…. I could never forgive myself if you had to stay like this for long…” Eric admitted.

“Doct-… Eric. Where’s all this coming from? I thought we had to maintain all the professional stuff…

“We would if this was an official visit… but I came here… just to make sure that you still wanted to… well leave this kind of life behind. I know it was an accident, but I’d also understand if you wanted to stay a group of famous handsome celebrities…” Eric said, breath finally catching up to him.

“I mean… I won’t lie. It’s nice being all rich all the time. But i miss the stability of living one life… I miss my old friends, my family and… well you. Wait… you mentioning all this. Does that mean you found a way for me to break the spell? How!?” Chris said feeling excited for the first time in awhile.

“Would you believe Santa Claus? The specifics aren’t important, but the long and short of it is that I can break the spell and remove your soul into a body formed in an image of your preference…If you’d like to do that… I mean… I had to ask…” Eric said looking hopefully at his once close friend and lover wearing the face of Chris Evans.

“Of course I want to! We can finally be together! And- wait… I thought…. well your employers would have more to say about all this. I-I… I’m guessing they don’t know about this do they?” Chris said a little concerned.

Eric shook his head. “No they don’t. That’s the other thing I needed to ask you. We’re gonna have to relocate… I’ve told my patients my plans and they’re ok with remote sessions for the time being till I can find them again… this book is really incredible… but you and I… for a few days at least… will need to go on the run for a bit… are you ok with that? I’m sorry for dumping so much on you, this is-”

TF Therapy: Retirement (Chris Part 2)

The doctor was interrupted as Chris leaned down to kiss Eric passionately on the lips. The two embraced, wrapping their arms around one another. Eric could even smell the slight bit of sweat on Chris as he’d finished his workout. Plus being pressed against the strong arms and solid chest of the former Captain America didn’t really encourage the doctor from letting go as the kiss completed.

“Eric. I’d follow you anywhere you’d go, if you would have me. I am ready for this spell to end and for… us to start.” Chris intertwined his fingers between Eric’s.

The doctor had never felt so enamored or flushed with affection. However, his sensibilities kicked in a few seconds later and broke the embrace. “Alright. I’m glad you’re on board. I can start the spell now and I’ve got a car waiting outside for us. The first part of the spell involves the creation of your new body. It can be anything you like! I imagine a guy like Chris Evans or Hemsworth?”

“Well… I mean. If you’d like it. I originally only casted the spell because I thought you’d like them.” Chris admitted

“Wait… really? Ok… Well… Chris. This has to be your decision. You tried so much for me. Let me do this for you. Be honest. What kind of body would you like? For YOU. I’ll format it into the spell I’m about to record” Eric asked earnestly. 

Dr. Evan’s Chang’s Spell for patient: Chris Fieldstone

Age: 37 Height: 6′10 Race: Nordic/Scandinavian Hair: Blond (Hairy) Build: Muscular (Burly) Voice: Baritone-Bass

“I… always wanted to be a bigger guy… and look kinda viking esque. I hope that’s ok.” Chris said looking like he just said something embarrassing.

“It’s perfect. Just like you are.” The two shared another kiss as Eric recited the spell. Chris expected ancient chants, but Eric was simply repeating his patient report out loud. When it ended Chris’ entire form felt very strange as he’d never experienced a physical transformation before! His body shot up in height and bulk, ripping through Chris Evan’s clothes! Then he heard his shoes split in two as two very large feet emerged from the designer coverings. Finally he let out a low moan as his voice deepened even more and blon hairs grew out of his body replacing the dark brown ones. A flash of light happened and the real Chris Evan fell out of the new huge Chris. The clothes he once wore reformed into something more appropriate as Evans was left nude in his own study.

Eric fainted shortly after and Chris, in his titanic new body caught him. “I was able to convert the spell into something I’m more familiar with… but it still takes a lot out of me. You’ll have to get us to the car. Are you ok to drive?”

Chris nodded and with surprising ease, carried Eric to the car parked outside, set him down gently in the passenger seat, and squeezed into the driver’s side.

“So….how do you feel… it’s a bit larger than what you’re accustomed to… I imagine… no shortness of breath or muscle soreness or-” Eric asked exhaustedly.

“I’m fine Eric. More than fine now that… well now that I feel more like me.. I don’t know how I could repay you for any of this… I feel… free.” Chris had never been happier. He didn’t feel the old inclinations to act like a stranger anymore. He was finally himself. 

The two stared at each other, unable to look away. A sweet silence they were unable to share before.

“How about you start driving and I’ll come up with a way later… big guy,” Eric smiled, knowing Chris would enjoy that last comment.

Chris smiled and drove off as quickly as he could. They could already see dark unmarked vehicles approaching from the other direction. Chris wasn’t sure where they were going or what would happen next, but he knew that it was alright. He looked at his boyfriend, now sleeping beside him, and a familiar feeling strained his shorts.


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