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Meet the Chemiballs: the Postal Post Transition Metals

The post transition metals are pretty much what they say on the tin. No, these aren’t post-op transgender metals, they’re the metals that come after the transition metals on the periodic table!

The British say we Americans pronounce aluminum wrong and that it’s actually “aluminium”. I mean, yeah, they’re probably right. It would make more sense to have the same -ium suffix as all the other metals. 

Therefore, for the sake of consistency, I propose Americans should just start pronouncing all the other -ium elements wrong also. Like sodum, potassum, helum, osmum, calcum, titanum, uranum, etc. Which is very fun to say out loud. Uranum!

For EVEN MORE FUN, we should also pronounce platinum and tantalum as platinium and tantalium. After all, what’s more quintessentially American than annoying the English and perverting their language?
Indiumball
Thalliumball
Galliumball melting into galliumblob

Gallumball has a very low melting point (you can melt it with bodyheat), and molten gallumblob has similar properties to mercuryblob but isn't poisonous!

dumb idiot tinball getting thanos snapped because he went outside during winter without a jacket

Tinball getting thanos snapped (tin metal likes to turn to dust when it gets too cold, a phenomenon known as tinpest)

leadball, destroyer of Boomer IQ scores
RAINBOW BIZMUTHBALL

I’ve thought long and hard about how to describe bismuth in a better way than the somewhat mad scientist Tom from Explosions&Fire. But I can’t, so I’m just gonna plagiarize quote him. 

“[Bismuth] has seen a bit of a revival lately as a bit of a ‘relatable icon element’ because it forms rainbows all the time, doesn’t like to be straight, and is incredibly dense. Personally, I’ve always thought of bismuth as lead for people who fear death.” -Tom

Meet the Chemiballs: the Postal Post Transition Metals
Ravings of a Mad Scientist
Balls, jokes, and elements from a very specific subset of the periodic table! Learn about them! What's not to love?

here's an article I wrote years ago about the post transition metals (where the art is from)


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