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26 for IW couple?

iw!couple: #26. Here, let me help you.

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You’re embarrassing. The kind of embarrassing that comes with doing things you probably could’ve avoided doing, and stupidly, had you possessed a forethought before the attempt. Right now? That’s forgetting you’re pregnant. And not just a little pregnant, but huge pregnant. “She’ll pop at any second” from nosy supermarket goers, kind of pregnant.

You underestimated not only your center of gravity (that took 3 whole months to get used to) but you don’t feel as big as you look either, which means you can easily circumnavigate- if only the watermelon in your gut would move to the goddamn left just a little-

Yoongi comes into the kitchen sometime after the thud and the jingle of your fiasco. “Did you drop your keys again?”

“Shut up.”

‘Again’ which means this has happened before. And just like before, Yoongi stands there and watches with the same amusement of a Vine compilation. If there’s one thing Yoongi remembers his mother telling him after a grumpy phone conversation of his wife being a pain in the ass, it was that pregnant women don’t like to be seen as incapable. They’ll smoosh and squat just to avoid waving the white flag of companionship. Yoongi remembers that now as he watches his pregnant wife try to bend to the motions of picking up the lonely key ring off the floor.

You catch Yoongi staring. “Enjoying your day at the fucking circus?” There’s sweat on your brow.

“Here. Let me help you.” He says, devoid of any real empathy. And he doesn’t even try to grab for the keys either. That would mean this show would come to an end. And it’s just amusing. You breathe through the motions of pre labor in your attempts at exercise. Even trying to scoop the keys up between your toes, failing when you realize you can’t reach your leg that high anymore either.

“No, bitch. I can do it myself. Gimme a second.”

“Alright then. Can you maybe kick the keys to the living room though and try there instead? You’re kind of blocking the fridge and I’m hungry.”

You bear your teeth. “I’m gonna inflate your dick to the size of an animal balloon and see how you fair.”

“My dick hasn’t been inflated in days. Something about enlarged uteruses and the razor sharp teeth that comes with them.” He walks to you, bends, sets the keys up on the counter in your reach. “There. Can you move now, I wasn’t kidding about being hungry.”