This Is Not A Good Real Life Day To Be Having These Particular Fandom Feels - Tumblr Posts
And then I get this awful feeling that endverse!Cas actually wound up being the only one who survived the suicidal shitshow with Lucifer, cuz he wasn't quite as human as he thought after all, and...
every once in a while i think about endverse destiel and feel like throwing up btw it drives me insane. theoretically since they only have each other they should be closer than ever. but in this world they aren't. cas has given up on life and spends every second stoned out of his mind so he can remain in blissful ignorance because he feels like he can't be useful to anyone without his powers. dean's crumbling under the guilt of failing everyone and the pressure of having to lead. he's forced to make harder and harder decisions for the sake of the group, not even realizing that he's becoming more like john with every passing day
it's just a worse, even more unbearable version of their dynamic in late season 5 because cas doesnt think he's even worth keeping around anymore. he's fallen for dean but it's cost him so much that he'd rather bury his head in the sand and wait for death to take him. he'll still follow dean anywhere but he doesnt know why he even wants him around at this point when he cant do anything to help. and dean knows that it's his fault that cas is human now, knows that he dragged him into a losing battle with nothing to show for it and he hates himself for it. hates that no matter how angry and ruthless he gets cas will stay until the bitter end