Yang Jungwon X Reader - Tumblr Posts - Page 4
boyfriend stories w/ jay?
౨ৎ IG stories with Jay as your bf
pairing: jay x gn!reader ⋆ genre: fluff ⋆ warnings: none
¡ requests: open !
Hello... I love your enhypen writings so much. Thank you for writing them ❤️
May I request a Jungwon imagine with a few years older female reader? Just fluff and scenes that brings butterflies, based on their song 10 months 🥹
Thank you in advance ❤️
౨ৎ 10 months with you
pairing: won x f!reader ⋆ genre: fluff ⋆ warnings: none
⤷ sorry this was rushed and that i took so long to answer </3
¡ requests: open !
Jungwon glares at the back of your head, he just can’t believe it! How could you look so beautiful laughing with someone that isn’t him?
He knows it’s wrong to crush on his older sister best friend but he just can’t help it. The way you smile at him to the way you bring comfort to him whenever he’s down, you’re like a candy he knows he can’t have. All those thoughts are flown out the window though when he feels his heart beat speed up as you turned around and waved him over.
As he rushes over, he makes sure his hair looks okay and smooth out his clothes. “Ready to go?” you ask softly and he immediately nods almost like he was in a dazed. His eyes shifted to the boy next to you which caused his eyes to narrow, he eyes him up and down before he dragging you away.
You squealed out a quick goodbye to your friend before turning to look at Jungwon with a puzzled look. He felt your stare at the side of his face and shrugged, “He looked at you funny.. don’t talk to him again” he shyly mumbled which erupted a giggle out of you.
You eyed him curiously before smiling to yourself. Jungwon felt you squeezed his cheeks and he jumped. “Sorry, you’re just so cute when you pout” and he groaned causing you to raise an eyebrow.
“Yn when will you realize how deeply in love I am with you?” he accidentally let out and he slapped his mouth.
You felt yourself freeze up before softly speaking up again, “What do you mean Jungwon?”
He gulped nervously and sighed, “Everyone already knew I’ve been harboring this crush on you way before you befriended my sister early in the year.. except for you and her.”
“I never thought i would have it in me to spill this all to you! And I know it’s wrong, but you’re just so funny and talented, you deserve someone just as smart and probably twice your height.. it’s like you still view me as kid!”
You rolled your eyes before grabbing both his cheeks to give him the softest kiss he ever felt. You pulled away and he stared at you as if he was under a spell just before a smile slowly stretched across his face.
“Can we do that again?” and you nodded your head so quick that it felt like whiplash. He leaned in and placed his lips on yours, his fingers gently sliding down your cheek.
His ten months’ love <3
Seas & Storms
god!yang jungwon x reader [afab]
[prev | the pantheon series | next]
genre: angst & smut
concept: your life has turned out exactly as you always wanted. a life by the sea, a husband who loves you, what could possibly go wrong? more than you ever imagined. when the god you have so devoutly worshiped for so long turns away from you, what else is left?
w/c: 8.8k
warning: god au, religious themes, religious imagery, water / open water, feelings of abandonment, crying, begging, implied discussion of death, light & lightning imagery; sexually explicit content, god fucking, body worship, vaginal sex, partially clothed sex, *unprotected sex, coming inside
For so long, Jungwon has spent his life in his ivory tower, watching from afar but hardly ever getting involved in the ways of mortals. While he’s intervened in ways that matter, in comparison to Sunghoon’s general hand-off approach except when solely necessary, he’s far from being the type to insert himself into the lives of mortals. He’s watched as his brothers play around, though never have their actions been dangerous. He knows of Jaeyun’s indiscretions and Jongseong’s tendency to teach men lessons they would never otherwise learn, but he does not stop them. Their lives are theirs to live after all and he has watched for many eons as they live them. It’s not his job to stop them, just the same way he knows that he will never be able to control his eldest brother. He’s come to terms with that.
Still, the silence of his eldest brother is deafening as he watches things spiral quickly out of control. He holds his tongue, the whispers between his brothers are obvious and true. He knows when they are lying and these are not lies. Whatever these mortals possess, it is more than simple indiscretions that bring his brothers to their doorsteps. His only hope is that when it comes, Heeseung won’t destroy everything in his path to get what he is owed.
Just the same, Jungwon hopes that he himself doesn’t fall victim to whatever possesses his brothers, whatever these mortals have within them that they desire so desperately. Surely if Jungwon were to take a bride, nothing would stop Heeseung.
Despite the cold of the air and the spray of the sea, you’ve never felt more free. You take in a deep breath of the salty sea air, leaning out over the railing of the cliff. The open water stretches out for leagues in front of you, a smile upon your face. You can’t help it, you’ve never been so happy, your fingers tight around the railing, sinking into the feeling. A pair of arms wraps around you from behind, causing you to grin, leaning back into the broad chest against your back.
“I’ve never seen you smile like this,” your husband whispers in your ear and you turn in his arms, wrapping your arms around his waist, your head on his chest. He presses a kiss to the crowd of your head, making you giggle.
“I know you have,” you reply. You lean back to meet his gaze as he looks down at you. “I know because I looked like this on our wedding day.”
“You look at the sea as you look at me?” He asks and you shrug. He laughs, pulling you in again, his hand petting your hair gently. “I suppose I’ll just have to deal with that. Your true love has always been the ocean.”
“I married you, didn’t I?” You retort, making him laugh.
Of all the things in your life, you’ve always been in love with the water. Even when you were young, your parents would tell you that your adoration with the sea was far more than that of any other person. Your favorite days are gray ones, when the storms roll in and cause the ocean to splash against the cliffs that surround the edge of your town, sending sprays of ocean water far up into the air. Your parents would scold you for spending so much time out in the cold and wet, especially when you would inevitably end up ill, but you insisted it was always worth it.
Your parents were unsurprised when you fell in love with a lighthouse keeper. You could never spend your entire life on a boat or waiting for him to come back, but to spend your whole life on the edge of the world, watching the ocean day in and day out, only he could understand you. They were hesitant to agree to your courtship, but he adored you, as you adored him. It was love at first sight, ending in long dates along the edge of the water, afternoons cliffside with the sea breeze in your hair, watching the midnight black waters coming in and out against the rocky shoreline. It didn’t take long until you were in a white dress at the top of the cliffs, saying I do.
Now, it’s just the two of you at this lighthouse. Though the town you grew up in isn’t far, you feel happier than you ever have, just you and the love of your life. Your family is in the back of your mind as you fantasize about the life you’re going to have, the family you’ll raise with him, the future you’re going to sow. Your skirts billow around your legs in the cold air, your head against your husband’s chest as you think about what’s going to come next for the two of you.
You’re left to think it over when your husband leaves your side, telling you he was going to head to town. It was why he came out to see you, kissing you gently. He reminds you to be careful, which you laugh at him for. Your whole life you’ve been at these cliffs, you know to be careful. He leaves you, hesitating to let go of your hand. You giggle when drags it out, eventually letting go so that he can head into town, as promised.
You linger at the edge of the lighthouse for a while longer, eyes scanning over the horizon, when you see it out of the corner of your eye. On a thin outcropping there lies a stone temple, the altar standing alone atop the cliffs. You gather your skirts in your hands, walking away from the railing to make your way over to it.
This altar hardly ever gets touched these days, standing precariously at the edge of the cliff, a strong storm nearly enough to send the tip of it tumbling down into the ocean. You don’t think much of it though, walking further up the cliff, approaching the small, stone shelter, a place you know well.
Once you step inside, the wind dies out around you and you admire the room for what it is. Much of the temple and the altar has begun to erode, even the visage of the God inside starting to wear. You lean forward to wipe it clean, smiling softly at the face that greets you.
“Hello again, Your Divinity,” you tell him. You reach into your pocket, thankful to find a handful of coins still in your skirts. You drop them all into the empty altar, knowing it’s been far too long since someone has bothered to trek this far to this particular temple. There are a great many altars that dot the shoreline for him, many much safer and closer. You touch the cheek of the handsome God affectionately, familiar with him as much as you would be an old friend. “I feel as though we have not spoken in a while,” you tell him. “I apologize.” Respectfully, you gather your skirts higher and drop to your knees in prayer.
Your familiarity with the King of the Gods is unlike anything else. Many people have told you that you must carry his spirit within you to be so taken with seas and storms. You have always laughed it off, as you are nothing less than mortal, never a thought ever crossing your mind that you could be anything else. There are those that think themselves as such, prophets or oracles, bridges between the gods and man, but you could never. You’ve always been simple. Still, you cherish him.
Jungwon has always been with you when there has been no one else. You always stuck out amongst the other children your age, head in the clouds, daydreaming about getting away from town. Your mind was consumed with the idea of the next time you would be by the sea, watching the clouds roll in. You could never be taken away from the sight of an incoming storm, odd and off putting to many others. When there was no one else, you would find yourself praying to Jungwon, asking his guidance. He became your confidant, the only person you could turn to. You always knew that even your parents thought you a little off, your siblings unable to understand your obsessions. He’s always been your closest friend.
Until your husband, of course.
When you rise from your prayer, you hesitate to leave, touching the cheek of the bust once more. You smile to yourself, thinking back on how you would insist that there would never be another for you than the God himself. You were just a child then, barely old enough to understand what you were talking about, but he was the most perfect thing to you. You sigh at your childhood obsession and let your hand drop away, turning away to head back down the cliff.
To say your life is quaint now would be far from a lie, long days spent tending to your home and reading your favorite books. Evenings walking along the ocean, letting the cool air tousle your hair, hand in hand with your beloved. At night, your house is illuminated by the light of the lighthouse. Sometimes you find yourself standing at the window, looking out into the crashing waves, watching for ships.
Rare are there ships that don’t know there are cliffs here, still sometimes there are dark shapes along the water, quickly changing course once seeing the bright, swinging light of the lighthouse. You watch as they move, arms wrapped around yourself, breathing in the cool night and being lulled by the sound of the waves upon the rocks.
It’s winter though, so the waves are choppy and rough, often leaving you alone at nights, your husband forced to work through the nights to make sure the lighthouse is lit for any passing ships. You don’t mind, you sleep through the nights comfortably, waking to the appearance of your husband at the kitchen door. You greet him warmly with breakfast and see him to bed. During the days he sleeps while you tend to the house and run to town. It’s a blessed little life.
Snow has, rather miraculously, fallen along the shoreline on a day when you go back out to the railing, dusting the long grass and rocky cliffs like powdered sugar. There is a storm incoming so you can’t be out long. The waves that crash against the shores are towering, known to sweep entire sections of crumbling cliffs out to sea. The place you stand is secure and settled, but that doesn’t mean you are. Still, you’re drawn to the edge of the cliffs, just until the storm truly comes in.
Impossibly, there is lightning off in the distance. You lean forward onto the railing, trying to make it out through the fog, gray clouds and ocean spray. It darts through the air in blinding arcs of white light, another sign of the God you so cherish. Your gaze falls to the waters that lap angrily at the rocks beneath you, kicking up against the rock and stone, throwing great spouts of salty spray into the air. You sigh to yourself, your heart aching.
Severe storms are said to be the manifestation of the King of the God’s frustrations, his anger pouring out of him uncontrollably, turning the water choppy and dangerous. It swirls like it’s boiling beneath you and you can’t help but wonder what’s upset him so.
“Come inside, Y/N!” Your husband calls from the entryway of the lighthouse. You turn away from the incoming storm to see him standing at the door. “The weather’s poor. If you stay out there, you’ll be swept out to sea!”
“I’ll be right there,” you call back. You turn back to the ocean for just another moment, your hair whipping around your face in the gusting wind. You sigh to yourself, hoping that it might calm soon. That the weather will be short and settle quickly. You turn to go, your hand leaving the railing to walk across the terrace, towards the lighthouse.
“Y/N!” Your husband suddenly shouts, and you look up to see nothing but horror written across his face. You turn, opening your mouth to scream but it’s swallowed by the water that rises over the railing, crashing down on you.
It sweeps you from the edge of the cliff, sending you spinning and spiraling through the wave that takes you, sweeping you over the railing. You look up as you’re thrown into midair, seeing your husband chasing after your floating form, standing at the railing, until you’re suddenly crashing down into the waters below. Gray and blue waters obscure your vision as you’re swallowed by the ocean, your eyes falling shut as it takes you.
“You should be more careful.”
You sit up with a gasp. Your heart is racing, your chest heaving and you quickly try to figure out where you are, your head turning this way and that to take in your surroundings. The air is crisp and clean, the grass you’re lying in long and soft, a dazzling green. You look out at the ocean, a sparkling, calm blue past the edge of the cliffs you sit upon. Your fingers dig into the dirt beneath you and you look down to see yourself draped in colors of white and cerulean. Your dress drips over you and you lift a hand to touch, like silk against your skin. A soft breeze blows your hair, which is suddenly tucked behind your ear by a gentle hand.
You turn to look, your heart jumping into your throat when you’re met by the gentle visage of the God you so desperately cherish. He smiles softly at you, dimples digging into his cheeks. He’s crouched beside you, his clothes like those of a king, white and gold and cerulean. Your eyes run over his body and he slowly rises to his feet.
“C’mon, then,” he tells you, offering you a hand. “Best not laze around all day.” With a trembling hand, you take the one offered to you, rising to your feet. Your knees are weak though, unsteady, and you stumble into him, his other hand coming up to steady you at your waist. “Watch your step,” he advises, voice soft. When you meet his eyes he smiles at you again.
“Where am I?” You ask. “Please don’t tell me—”
“You’ll not be going there for a long time yet,” he assures you, letting go of your waist once you’re steady. His hand also leaves yours and you find yourself missing his warmth. “Don’t worry about that. I’ll make sure of it.” He nods to the side and you turn, gathering your skirts in your hands to fall into step with him, barefoot while he wanders in boots, hands clasped behind his back.
“Then where am I?” You ask and Jungwon sighs.
“Right now, we’re inside of your mind,” he informs you and your breath catches. “You’ll have to forgive me, I didn’t have a better place to meet you.” He tips his head forward a bit as though embarrassed. “I wanted our meeting to be a little less personal but you see, I was out of line. I suppose even I cannot fully control myself sometimes,” he tells you, turning his head to look away from you, out towards the ocean.
“Your… Divinity?” You ask, confused.
“You weren’t supposed to get caught up in that wave,” he tells you and your eyes widen. “I wasn’t… ah, I was being reckless.” He looks at you and you’re startled by the sincerity in his eyes, clearly very apologetic. “Even Gods make mistakes sometimes, it seems. I hope you’ll forgive me.”
“Nothing to forgive,” you rush to assure him but Jungwon simply shakes his head.
“Kind of you to say such a thing,” he says, a wry smile on his lips, “but it was my mistake.” He stops and then steps in front of you. His eyes are so clear and beautiful, staring directly into yours. It sort of feels like staring into the sun, the golden glow of him when he looks at you, the warmth that emanates off of his skin. You have to restrain yourself from reaching out and touching, too curious for your own good. “I don’t mean to come off as cold,” he suddenly adds and you blink at him, “but you have to understand, you must not call upon me anymore.”
Your heart feels as though it’s stopped in your chest. You’ve forgotten you’re in your own head so you’re surprised when the sky suddenly turns dark. Jungwon sighs softly, eyes falling to the ground as the once beautiful blue sky becomes covered in dark gray clouds, a dangerous wind picking up around you. It whips at your hair and skirts, blowing his hair around his face and ruffling his clothing. He steps closer to you but you step back and there is a crack of lightning in the distance.
“What have I done?” You ask, voice trembling. “What did I do to cause this? Please, you have to tell me—”
“It doesn’t matter,” he insists, cutting you off. “My reasons are unimportant. The only important thing is that as long as you live, you have to call upon someone else to answer you. It cannot be me.”
“But you- you’ve always been—”
“I cannot any longer,” he says, causing tears to well in your eyes. He avoids your gaze, looking out towards the ocean where it begins to stir and swirl with dangerous, crashing waves. They throw themselves against the wall of rocks, causing great sprays of water and seafoam. “I see I’m not the only one capable of great storms.”
“Why did you save me if you only wanted to tell me never to pray to you again? Why bother?” You demand. You close the distance between the two of you, staring hard at the side of his face. He doesn’t meet your gaze though and you don’t see the way his eyes glow with lightning, the way his chest catches with his breath. You’re staring so intently at his profile that you can’t see the way he has to clench his fingers into fists to stop himself from touching you.
“Because I had to,” he whispers. The wind wraps around the two of you, getting louder and faster, manifesting the whirling cyclone of your emotions, trying to figure him out. “Because your life was meant to be saved. You’re not meant to die yet.”
“Send me to him if you must! Maybe he won’t treat me in such a way!” You shout and Jungwon’s eyes widen. He turns to you and you stagger back a step when you see the flickering lightning that consumes his irises, flashing like a storm.
“If you think me cruel, he can be more so,” Jungwon warns you. “Do not ask for what you don’t understand.”
“How can I go on without you?” You ask him.
“You will find a way. Your husband is your God now.”
Your breath catches and the world is struck with lightning, a searingly bright light filling your vision. You stumble backwards, throwing your hand over your face, trying to get away from it. The world goes dark around you immediately afterwards.
When you wake again, it’s in your bed, at home. You blink your eyes open slowly. Someone shouts, there is running and yelling and cheering and crying around you. You don’t move, staring at the ceiling listlessly despite the sound of your husband and your parents and your siblings calling out to you. Tears drip down the sides of your face.
You were found on a low lying beach, miraculously having washed up despite the waves that took you under. Everyone thought for sure you would be killed by crashing against the rocks. When you were found you were taken home and seen by a doctor that told your loved ones that you were blessed by the Gods, that Jungwon had mercy on you. You’re not so sure about that.
Things have been different ever since you woke up. While your family has been keeping a close eye on you, tending to you, waiting on you hand and foot to be sure you’re well enough, you haven’t even half the spark you previously did. Your books collect dust, your lovely dresses and skirts go unworn, you spend many hours in bed or sitting in your sitting room, staring out the window. Your parents and husband mutter amongst themselves, concerned with your sudden change in demeanor. It’s strange, of course, but they try not to mention it to you. After all, you almost died. Maybe you’re just dealing with whatever emotions might come along with that feeling.
However, the one thing they thought might actually bring you joy, you avoid more than anything. Your husband insists that it’s normal, you wouldn’t want to see the sea, not with the way it nearly killed you, but your parents aren’t so sure. Even with such a terrifying ordeal as that, you’ve always been so charmed by the ocean, what lies beneath its depths. But when brought up, you turn away from them.
“I don’t want to,” you tell them, bundling yourself in your blankets. “I’d rather just stay in.”
It fills you with a sense of immense sadness. Even when it rains, something even your husband thought might cheer you up, you don’t move from your bed. You watch the water fall and drip down the panes of the window, only to eventually disappear back into the bedroom, hiding under your blankets. He doesn’t understand, of all the things in this world, you’ve always adored the rain, but now you hide from it. He watches from the doorway as your shoulders shake with your muffled sobs, a sense of loss you can barely fathom ripping through you.
Over time, your sadness changes within you. You start to get up, get dressed, tend to the house, go to town, but you’re far from alright. Instead you become short, bitter and even angry. Your parents have long since retreated to their home once more, telling your husband to inform them if you were to fall ill but you don’t. Instead, it just means that he is the sole recipient of your unending rage, directed at the God you trusted most, but also him.
Your husband is your God now, it echoes through your head when you find yourself alone. You try to ignore it but it sits with you, festering like a wound in your chest. Sometimes you can’t barely think with the way it fills your mind, forcing you to pace restlessly through your own home.
What does that mean? What could he mean by that? Why would he say that to you? Does he abandon you because you’re married? Did he leave you, tell you that you cannot ever call upon him, because your husband is the most important thing to you now? Has the love of your life become the one thing that comes between you and your religion, the very God you cherish most of all?
It’s like acid, eating away at you, your thoughts, your actions, even your words become tight and corrosive when you speak to him. You know that it is not his fault, you love him, you adore him, he’s the man you chose to marry but you can’t control the spite that rises inside of you when you think about it. What is it about him that drove your God away? What could he have done to make Jungwon turn away like that, so brutally? You can’t stand it.
You grow to resent him, no matter how much you wish you didn’t.
You spend more and more time alone, spending full days out on the cliffs rather than in the cloying atmosphere of your home, glaring down into the ocean and out the clouds that swirl above the sea. Your husband hardly speaks to you, the house becomes tense with silence. Nothing makes you happy, nothing makes sense anymore, the entire life you’ve lived before you were thrown into the ocean is meaningless to you without the God you used to follow so closely. You could pray to the others, perhaps Jongseong, perhaps he would understand you, your plea for peace and justice for your aching heart, but it doesn’t matter. You don’t want to pray to anyone but him, but he doesn’t care. He probably wouldn’t even listen.
You climb along the cliffs edges as the winter wind whips at you, your body bundled up in many layers to keep the chill away. You can’t help yourself, you find yourself drawn to that little altar you went to so happily not so very long ago. How quickly things change.
You step inside and the wind dies out around you, leaving just you and him. You look upon his countenance as affectionately as you ever have. How silly for you to be so attached to a God that cares not for you. How silly to be so heartbroken over something you never truly had and yet you are. And yet when you look at him, you’re filled with an unimaginable sadness and rage.
Blinding, crackling rage.
“Are you happy?” You tell him, though you doubt he is listening. “Is this what you wanted? Is this all you were hoping for? I thought Gods were supposed to be kind and just and right but you…” You sigh, shaking your head to yourself. “It was childish, I know that now. Do you remember the way I used to coo over you? I’m sure you don’t. I’m sure you found my prayers exhaustive and annoying, why else would you grow bored of me? You were the most important thing to me for such a long time. You were my only friend. And now I don’t even have that.” You lift a hand to your face when you feel a hot tear drip over your cheek. “Does this please you?” You spit. “Is this secretly what you have always wanted. Followers to kneel at your feet just so you can ignore them, just so you can turn away when they need you? I guess Gods are hardly what we make them out to be.”
Your fingers, usually lined with rings, are bare. Have been bare since you awoke in your bed that first day, but you pull a familiar piece of jewelry from your pocket. You throw it carelessly into the bowl of his altar to accompany the coins you once put there, rusted from the elements. You turn on your heel, stomping out.
It settles between the coins in the basin of the bowl, the insignia of a bolt of lightning glinting upon the silver ring.
When you return home, you gently close the door behind you. You make yourself tea, leaning against the counter of your kitchen, wiping roughly at your cheeks. Your tears are half dried from the wind but still they keep coming, causing you to have to keep trying to wipe them away, wetting your face. You sniffle pitifully, rubbing at your nose, hopeful that it might stop soon.
A loud bang from the bedroom startles you, causing you to push off from the kitchen counter. You walk towards the bedroom, only to be blocked by the frame of your husband. You stare at him, wide eyed and confused, only for him to scoff, shouldering past you into the main room. You turn to watch him, noticing the trunk he carries with him.
“What- what is that?” You ask. He ignores you, dropping it onto the floor and flipping it open. It’s already filled with clothing, well packed like he’s going away for a long time. You rush to his side while he grabs his coats from beside the door, shoving them into the case. “What’re you doing? Are you leaving?”
“Well,” he begins, stuffing them inside and then closing the case. He turns on you and you’re taken aback by the anger in his eyes. “Considering you barely treat me like your husband anymore, I thought it might do the both of us some good to get away from one another.”
“You just decided this?” You ask. “You didn’t even ask me?”
“I thought you’d prefer it if I just up and left. Disappeared for a while, so you can stop feeling so suffocated by me,” he insists and tears begin to well in your eyes again. He shakes his head, picking the case up. He picks up his last coat, putting it on at the door. You’re too dumbstruck to follow him, shocked by his decision. “My father will be by tomorrow to run the lighthouse, he knows you’re here alone. I’ll be staying with my mother for the time being in town, until…” he trails off, then sighs, turning towards you. “Until we make a decision.”
“What do you mean ‘make a decision’?” You ask, your voice breaking.
“I think you know very well what I mean,” he tells you. You bite your lip to stop it from trembling, your husband turning away to put his shoes on. He all but rips the door open, and slams it shut behind him.
You’re left alone, hopelessly alone, in your home. Without your husband, without your God. Your knees give out beneath you, causing you to fall to the floor. Tears flow from your eyes unbidden, your breath hiccuping out of you as you sob on the floor of your sitting room. You’re so utterly alone.
Your bedroom feels like a cavern, empty and dark when the sun goes down. You’ve not eaten, not even tried to start a fire. A storm has begun outside and you can hear the ocean waves crashing against the cliffs, the wind whipping against the walls of your home. You stare into the darkness of your room, wearing only your nightgown, unable to sleep but not wanting to be awake. Your mind is both awake and not. Your eyes have turned red rimmed and sore, you’re leaning against the wall the head of your bed is pushed up against, your tear tracks dried on your face.
The night is so dark outside, only illuminated by the occasional flash of lightning. Your eyes have long adjusted to it though, the shapes and shadows of your bedroom so familiar you know where everything is. Still, it feels foreign and strange when you know that your dresser is half empty, your husband’s shoes are missing from beside the door, his coats gone. You feel like an empty shell of yourself, no one to blame but yourself.
You don’t hear the creak of the door under the sound of the wind howling, the waves crashing, the storm rolling. You don’t even see him, your eyes unfocused at the wall of your bedroom, though he comes with a golden glow. It isn’t until he’s gently easing the door of your bedroom further open that you finally turn your head slightly, taking him in.
“What do you want?” You whisper through the quiet of your room. He looks at you with something you can only assume is pity. “Did I finally do it? Was I finally pitiful enough for you to have mercy?”
“You don’t understand,” Jungwon says.
“Then why are you here?” You ask, your voice rough with your crying. “What are you doing here? If I’m just some useless mortal that you can throw aside so easily, if I don’t understand, then why come here at all?” He approaches you slowly and, impossibly, more tears leak down your face. “Don’t come closer if you’re just going to push me away again. Have I not been through enough? Please, just send me to the bridge. Just end my suffering.”
“I told you, you’ll not be going there—”
“What else do I have to live for?!” You ask, finally standing from your bed. Tears stream down your cheeks and you can’t help but think you must look so small, so pathetic and insignificant to him. You must be worth less than nothing to him but still you can’t stop the way you cry, sobs tearing from your throat. Jungwon looks at you with big eyes, but they’re empty. You can’t see the way he holds himself taut in the darkness, hands clenched into fists at his sides. “My husband has left me here alone. I have ruined my own life. I have no one else. I cannot go back to my parents, they think me too strange. My siblings will never understand me. I barely understand myself. You do not understand how lonely an existence I will live going forward.” You stagger towards him, only to drop to your knees in front of him. Jungwon flinches back as you grab at the bottom of his pants. “Please, I have nothing left. I cannot live like this.”
Slowly, he drops to his knees before you. You won’t meet his gaze, staring at the flooring as tears drip from your eyes, splashing down onto the flooring of your bedroom. Your broken form is too much for him, even he can’t stop himself from reaching for you, gently taking your cheek in hand. You whimper softly, a sob caught in your throat as he tilts your head up. Still, you refuse to look at him and he relents to the ache within him. He leans forward, pressing a kiss to your forehead.
“I thought I was protecting you, protecting the both of us,” Jungwon whispers into your skin. “I see now how wrong I was.” When he pulls back, he brushes his thumb over your cheek, and you finally lift your gaze from the floor to his face. “Still, you do not understand. You must make amends with your husband, you must turn away from me. It is the only way.”
“Don’t you see?” You cry. Your fingers fist the front of his jacket, pulling him closer. Jungwon turns his head away from your tears, closing his eyes. “Perhaps they have always been right. I can’t. Without you, I don’t know who I am. The God I’ve followed for so long, and he no longer wants me? He pushes me away when I am weakest? How can you ask that of me? Do I mean that little to you?”
“You mean everything to me,” Jungwon whispers. When he opens his eyes, you’re shocked to see tears in them. “Please forgive me.”
“Don’t pull away,” you plead. “Don’t leave me. Please, just stay.” You rest your forehead against his chest, gripping the front of his jacket. “Please, you’re all I have left.” Jungwon cradles you to his chest, no matter how much it pains him. Tears drip down his own cheeks and he cannot bear the pain of your cries anymore.
All these weeks he’s ignored your cries, nearly torn to shreds by your helpless prayers. Everything else has been drowned out by the sound of your voice, the ache in your worship. You stopped calling out to him, but he could feel you, like you were an ever-present ghost. He couldn’t hope to ignore you, he was haunted by your vision, your voice, what your prayers felt like, how it felt like something was tied around his throat, pulling and choking every time he turned his back on you. He understood what Sunghoon felt, the need to obey, the desire to be with you. Surely he can’t blame them now, even though Sunoo and Riki both followed his guidance, staying distant until they were sure, of course they eventually fell to their mortals. Their goddesses.
And Jungwon will too.
“Forgive me, brother,” he whispers. In the same breath, his arms wrap around your body, sliding beneath your knees and your back, lifting you into his arms. You gasp, clinging tighter to his jacket as Jungwon gets to his feet, holding you against his body. You daren’t look up to see whatever his expression is, surely tired of you, of your insolence and crying, trying to find a way to leave you behind. His jacket is balled up in your hands and you’re lowered back down, but his body doesn’t leave yours.
“Look at me,” Jungwon whispers. Slowly, you lift your gaze from his chest, finding him looking down at you. His hand cups your cheek again, your body against his, and he tilts your face up gently. “Forgive me.” You don’t get a chance to answer before his mouth is on yours.
It’s like lightning in your veins, your own body lit up with the feeling of electricity pulsing through you. Your eyes roll back as they close, your hands leaving his jacket to instead touch his neck, wrapping around the sides of it. Jungwon’s arm clutches your body close to his, his lips intent and warm against yours. Your mouth falls open to the sweet press of his tongue, your God tasting you eagerly, moaning into your lips. It’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt before, star bursts and fireworks and a sizzling desire pooling in your stomach. You shift against him, causing Jungwon to let go of your face, instead grabbing your thigh.
He rolls the two of you over, your head hitting the pillows as he leans over the top of you, your leg hooked over his hip, sending your nightgown falling to bunch around your hips. His hand slides up the bare length of your thigh as he kisses you breathless. You try to keep up, but every sensation is rushing through your body, hot and aching and bright and beating. You can’t control the way you arch up against him, wanting and needing and restless.
When he parts from your mouth, he tips his forehead against yours, panting against your lips. You pet your fingertips over his jawline, breath ragged. His fingers are splayed out over your lower back and your thigh, almost too warm against your bared skin. When you open your eyes, you realize his are still closed.
“You can still push me away, you know?” He whispers and you gasp softly. “You don’t have to do this. I know you love him.”
“Can I have you if I have him?”
“No,” Jungwon admits. It hurts, but it’s true. As long as you’re down here, as long as you’re mortal, Jungwon cannot answer you. He cannot do that, it would tear him apart. He has to ignore you, no matter how much it hurts, no matter how badly he wants to answer your every prayer, be at your beck and call, a God cannot obey a mortal. His immortal life cannot be guided simply that of a mortal, everything would be wrong. He would do anything for you and he cannot allow that. If you are bound to the Earth, he cannot be bound to you.
“Then… then promise me he’ll be safe. Promise me his happiness,” you whisper. Jungwon bites at his lip, knowing this would be the exchange. All things with a price, all things in exchange for another. “And I’ll be yours.”
“You don’t have to—”
“I cannot live without you,” you insist. You press another kiss to his lips, tugging him in. His fingers dig into your skin, trying to force control within himself. You are intoxicating and dangerous, he shouldn’t be lying with you and yet he is. When you part, your lips brush his as you speak. “Please, I cannot imagine a life where I am abandoned by my God. I will only grow to resent him further. Do not let me do that. I will only make him unhappy, we will never understand each other again. Let me free him, and in turn you get me.” You bring his forehead against yours again, brushing your nose against his. “I know you will make me happy. As long as he is happy too, I can live unburdened.”
“Is it what you desire?” Jungwon whispers.
“It is.”
“Give me your word. Give me your life. And I promise, you will never know sadness again. I swear to you, a life you’ve dreamed of. A future you’ve always wanted. I would do that. I would do anything,” Jungwon promises. “But you must be mine.”
“Then I am yours.”
It’s all the answer Jungwon needs, pressing his lips against yours once more, needy and desperate for you. You kiss him back just the same, letting your arms wrap around him as his hands grip you tightly. Bright flashes of light go off behind your eyelids as his hands roam over your body, every touch causing a bright spark to light up your veins, into your bones. Electricity pulses through you like a storm, the sound of the rainstorm outside almost covering up the soft whimpers you let out into his mouth as he caresses your body, hands grabbing at your clothes and your skin.
He rolls you back on top of him, bringing your legs around his waist so he can run his hands up your thighs. You let him have at you, gathering the material in his hands, slowly sliding it up your body, over the curves of your hips and waist. You become revealed to him, your underwear, up your stomach and your chest. He pulls away just so he can pull it over your head. You let him discard it carelessly, bringing your hands down onto his clothed chest as his hands land on your waist.
“You are so beautiful,” Jungwon whispers in the darkness. You feel your skin heat, the idea of being complimented in such a way by a God imaginable. “How have I resisted you?” He leans up to kiss your chest, running his mouth from the bottom of your breasts up the valley of them to your collarbones. Your own desire crackles through you, clutching him close as he mouths over your body, towards your neck while his hands slide up to cup your chest. “I can’t do it anymore,” he pleads into your skin. “I can’t. I need you.”
“You have me,” you whisper, running your fingers through his hair. “You have all of me. You always have.”
His hands leave you so he can pull his jacket and shirts open, your fingers fumbling to help him undress. His clothing is gilded in gold, lined in white and cerulean blue, but he cares not for how ornate it is. He tears it off like it doesn’t even matter, throwing it aside so he can pull you up against him. Hands on your jaw, he pulls your face down towards his, pressing your lips together again. This time you’re the one doing the taking, kissing down into his desperate mouth, while his hands roam your body once more, up your back and down your waist, sizzling trails of heat everywhere he touches. You can barely stand it, aching between your legs, the need in him calling out to the need in you.
His mouth drags over your lips, your cheek, down your jaw. Your hands run over his bare shoulders, soaking in the feeling of him, the heat of his skin, the way you can feel how desperately he desires you with the way he holds you against him. His hands drop down to your backside, curving around the cheeks of your ass, rocking you against his lap. You throw your head back in a moan as your clothed crotch is guided over his, his moans muffled into your throat as he kisses you, sucking wet kisses over your skin. His teeth graze you, sending a shower of bright sparks through you, images of crackling lighting rolling through your mind.
“Please.” The word drips from your lips without your permission, agony in your tone. You’re trembling on top of him, letting your hands run down the length of his chest, his stomach, reaching down for the front of his pants. He doesn’t stop you, hissing through his own desperation, his entire attention on your body. From your neck to your collarbones, you can feel how your skin smarts under his mouth, his teeth and his lips relentlessly marking you, down towards your breasts.
You tug the front of his pants open, finally, trying to push them down his hips. Jungwon moves to let you, lifting his hips as best he can with you on top of him. Once far enough down, his cock is freed from the confines of his clothing and you take him in hand. Jungwon moans, dropping his head forward against your chest, eyes closed as you stroke his cock quickly. You’re too wound up, lost in the pleasure and desire of him, you don’t even care about being fully undressed.
“Jungwon,” you whisper, the name of your god dropping from your lips. Jungwon lifts his head and you gasp at the way his eyes shine, bolts of lightning and electricity glinting inside of his irises.
“Say it again,” he says, moving his hand to your cheek. You swallow, hesitating. “Please, say it. Say it again,” he begs, pulling your face down towards his. “Please, it’s so lovely from your lips.”
“Jungwon,” you whisper and he moans. His cock twitches against your palm, making your breath catch. You can’t stand it, you rise to your knees. From this angle, he looks up at you, wide eyed and pink cheeked. He looks too sweet for words. Were it not for the glowy golden hue that emanates off of him you might think him just another mortal, just another gorgeous man, but you know he’s not. He’s so much more. You reach down to push your underwear aside, aligning the head of his cock to your entrance. Sinking down on him, your eyes roll back, and his flare alive.
Almost like a beacon in the dark, his eyes burn white and gold while you take him inside of you. His hands grab at your hips, digging his fingers in so hard it hurts. You try to cry out but you can’t, your breath caught in your chest as you feel like you’ve been thrown directly into a storm, shaking and trembling as something crushes your chest, strikes through your bones, aches through your muscles. Too many sensations overtake your body as you take him inside of you, forced to grab at his shoulder to try and steady yourself through the overwhelm of it all.
When you finally gasp another full breath you’re thrown out of your body just as quickly as Jungwon suddenly thrusts up into you, almost knocking you over. You cry out, clutching further to him to try and keep yourself upright. You find yourself holding onto him as he brings you down onto him, muffling moans into his neck as he mouths at your shoulder, hands gripping your hips. You can’t think, can barely breath as Jungwon forces your hips back and forth on him, rocking you onto his lap, moaning into your skin.
The sound of thunder and lightning echoes through your mind, like you’re in the eye of the storm, shaking apart above him. When you’re suddenly peeled away from him you see his eyes, glowing and burning for just a moment, and then his mouth is on your chest. Jungwon’s lips touch every part of you, over your breasts, licking and sucking at your nipples while rocking his hips up into yours. You lower your head down to tuck your nose into his hair, gasping and whimpering through the pleasure that soaks through you like a storm, like rain, like a crashing wave. His mouth touches the middle of your chest and you scream when it feels like you’ve been struck by lightning.
“So beautiful,” Jungwon whispers as he bounces you on his cock, your eyes flashing gold, a glowing light beginning to take over your chest. When he finally pulls back from your skin he’s staring at the words he’s carved into your body, an aching claim. You writhe on top of him, fingers digging into his shoulders as he guides your frantic pace, keeping himself as deep inside of you as possible.
You can fill it building, aching, churning like the sea inside of you, helpless to the way it takes you. To the way Jungwon takes you. His fingers are like a brand on your skin, your body is barely your own, awash with pleasure the likes of which you have never experienced. When you gaze down at him, you can see the glow of his eyes, the crackle of lightning within them. Your god beneath you, around you, inside of you, you’ll let him have you. Have every part of you. You lower your head down to his again and the both of you close your eyes, clinging to one another.
“Give yourself to me,” he whispers in the thin space between your faces.
“I have always been yours,” you tell him. You kiss down into his mouth, Jungwon planting his feet on the bed to fuck up into you again, and again. Your mouth falls open, allowing him to lick into it, swallowing the cries that spill from your lips. He relentlessly takes you, desperate for it, the glow that he knows will encompass you, the bright light that shines from within. He needs it to see it, he needs to know you’re his, forever.
Your cunt clenches around him, trapping him inside, your body shaking so hard it feels as though you’re going to shatter in his arms. Jungwon holds you, refusing to let go. The tightness of your body, the way you writhe on top of him, it sends him over the edge, pulling away from your mouth to moan. When he peels his eyes open to look, you are godly.
Golden light peers out from between your half lidded eyes, the characters of his name written into your chest. It consumes you, ebbing through your body as it swallows you. Jungwon lets his eyes slide shut again, burying his face into your chest, content with the heat of you against him.
When you wake, you’re alone. You roll over in the sheets, confused and lost. You gather the golden blankets that wrap your frame, covering yourself as you survey your surroundings. Everything is dipped in white and gold, cerulean trim and marble walls. As you take in the room you find yourself in, you look over to see a window, and at it is your bed partner. He stands there in just a robe, his shoulder against the window frame, arms crossed over his chest. Slowly, you gather yourself, worried about what he might be thinking about.
“Jungwon?” You ask, voice soft. Jungwon turns to look at you and his expression softens immediately. You can see the tension that lingers around his eyes though, the anxiety he carries in his shoulders. “Is everything alright?”
“It will be,” he tells you. He uncrosses his arms to reach a hand out to you. You move to him, taking the offered hand. You’re still wrapped in blankets, carefully covered, and Jungwon draws you in, keeping your blankets wrapped tightly around you. You end up against his chest, your head on his shoulder, his cheek on your head. “I think I already love you,” he whispers. It lodges your heart in your throat, eyes widening.
“You do?” You whisper. He pulls back from you so you can look up at him. “Do you mean that?”
“Of course I do,” Jungwon assures you. “How could I not? After everything, the way you called to me, the way I couldn’t resist you,” he cups your cheek in hand, leaning down to kiss your forehead, trailing over your temple and cheek, only to end at your lips, pressing a hard yet sweet kiss there. “I think a part of me has always needed you,” he confesses against your lips. “I think I fell in love with you along the way.”
“I have always loved you,” you tell him and Jungwon smiles softly.
“I know.”
On Earth, beyond the river, past the bridge that curves below the surface, a gateway to what lies beyond, there is yet another disturbance. When he throws open the door to his library, he can feel the change. The tension in the air, and his eyes seek the trembling of the bottle on his shelf.
“I thought we had an understanding, brother,” Heeseung whispers to himself, picking it up. It shakes in his hand, the liquid inside twisting and turning, like it’s boiling, like the churning of the sea, turning blue, green, yellow, gold. He sighs to himself, reaching over to rest it on the scale. He watches as the scale rises, the bottle and what lies inside light than air. “It seems I’ll just have to take what I am owed.” He plucks the bottle from where it sits on the scale, turning it over in his hand. “And the cost… will be so great,” he mutters to himself, curling his fingers around it.
a/n: *the unprotected sex depicted is both purposeful and symbolic, engage in safe sex practices like condoms and contraceptives in real life. safe sex saves lives; oh, jungwon. my darling, sweet jungwon, what have i done? i loved writing this but also it tore me in two, i felt so bad the whole time. i hope you guys enjoyed it for what it was and i hope you're all excited for what's coming up. the pantheon continues...
perma. taglist: @ducksstolemybread @dr0wnme0ut @pockettwinzz @emi-en @lilyuwon @deobitifull @oddracha @skzenhalove @nyfwyeonjun @bunhoons @ministrawberrywithchocolate @heeshlove @nshmrarki @avaleyshin @zeeloveshee @nyxtwixx @enha-bie @manifestobackshot @onlyuyu @in-somnias-world @hoonmine
series taglist: @baekxo07 @pinksweetlittlepiano @hooniebaekgu @starfallia @heelovesmeknot @lovgfrd @xiaoderrrr @jakayval @jaeyunluvr @jungwonloveer @j5yy @seunghancore @binniesbabe @strxwbloody @vveebee @cherlv @aileeeeeeeeeeeee @yongbokified @immelissaaa @fertilizedtoesw @sumzysworld @emberuby @sunshine-skz @nicleyrou @rikibun @lilactangerine @iveivory @yoonzns @addictedtohobi @wonnie99 @enha-stars
Match Found ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ - 7. wishful thinking
Synopsis: Jungwon is sick of his friends' constant teasing over his lack of gaming skills. Determined to secretly improve and prove enha wrong, Jungwon sets out to learn to play, except he has no clue where to begin. Luckily for him, y/n is a girl with too much time on her hands, a desperate need for distraction and is more than happy to indulge him. Only, things are never that simple and Jungwon soon finds it difficult to explain exactly what the pair have become.
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smau only (ik its a shocker) ; warnings: cursing :)
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a/n: aww it's y/n's healing era. :) . short chapter bc the next one is painfully long lol enjoy <3
taglist: open! send me an ask to be added!
@woncloudie @itsactuallylina @ifearjwn @fadedluvv @mangowonyo @xiaoderrrr @shinsou-rii @aki1e @makiswrld @jaehaki @criyiy @ilovewonyo @zeraaax @climbingmandevillas @pkjay @flower-lise @koudnd @beomgyusonlywife
Match Found ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ - 8. night night
Synopsis: Jungwon is sick of his friends' constant teasing over his lack of gaming skills. Determined to secretly improve and prove enha wrong, Jungwon sets out to learn to play, except he has no clue where to begin. Luckily for him, y/n is a girl with too much time on her hands, a desperate need for distraction and is more than happy to indulge him. Only, things are never that simple and Jungwon soon finds it difficult to explain exactly what the pair have become.
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smau + (3.3k) written work (srry lol i have no excuse )
warnings: mentions of death and parental neglect. mentions of injury and blood. cursing.
“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I gotta go,” Jungwon curses to himself as he hops around the room, pulling on his sneakers and grabbing his hoodie off of his chair. Running his fingers through his hair, Jungwon spins aimlessly in the middle of his room, eyes darting around frantically for a glimpse of his keys and wallet.
Fucking hell. I don't have time for this. I'll just text someone to let me in tomorrow. Jungwon abandons the seemingly impossible task and bursts out of his room, startling Heeseung who looks up at him through a mouthful of ramen.
“Hyung, I need your car. I'll bring it back sometime tomorrow. Where are your keys? Jungwon asks, feet tapping impatiently against the floor.
Heeseung only stares back in wide eyed confusion, swallowing harshly. "Woah Jungwon, you good? Where are you even heading out this late?"
Jungwon groans in exasperation, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Look hyung, I need to get to Y/N's right now. It's important and I'm worried. Can we please save the story time for later? Either give me your keys or I'm just gonna run there."
Heeseung' stare softens at Jungwon's anxious demeanor and he pushes away from the table, standing up. "I'll drive you, it's not safe for you to be on the road when you're this worked up. Come on, let's go"
Jungwon doesn't wait for Heeseung to finish his sentence, walking briskly out the door without a second glance. Heeseung gives his half eaten bowl of ramen one last doleful look "I'll be back for you baby girl,” sighing as he follows Jungwon out.
The car ride is tense to say the least. Any attempts of making jokes or small talk are quickly shut down by a sharp glare from the passenger seat. Jungwon knows he's being irrational, that Heeseung is doing him a favor and he should be grateful and much nicer. But the hammering of his heart against his ribs won’t allow him to act rationally and he knows that Heeseung understands, he always does. So Jungwon vows to thank him and apologize properly later but for now, he allows his mind to be consumed by thoughts of you.
As the car finally turns down the familiar street of your place, Jungwon's fingers drum insistently against his bouncing thigh. His energy begging to be expended as he resists the urge to just jump out of the car and run up all 42 flights to your side. A gentle pat on his shoulder brings him back to reality, and Jungwon turns to meet his friend's warm gaze.
"Don't worry Jungwon. Y/N seems like a strong girl. I'm sure she’s fine. And even if she's not, she will be eventually." Heeseung says softly.
Jungwon nods stiffly, willing himself to believe Heeseung's words.You were fine. You had to be. "You can pull over here hyung, it's that building. Thanks for taking me" he mutters quietly, unbuckling his seatbelt.
"Alright Jungwon, do you want me to wait for you out here? Or go up with you?" Heeseung asks as the car rolls to a stop.
"No. Go home hyung. I'll see you tomorrow." Jungwon says firmly and takes off in a brisk jog.
Knowing he was almost at his destination did nothing to calm the jitters that ran down his spine. If anything, it just spurred him to run even faster, ignoring the curious looks he got as he moved through the familiar lobby, dashing into the waiting elevator.
Come on, come on, come on. Y/N why the fuck do you have to live all the way at the top. The numbers on the elevator ascend at a tortuous pace and Jungwon feels as if he might just lose his mind. The chime of the doors opening finally puts him out of his misery and Jungwon sends up a silent prayer that Chenle was right about your code as he punches it into the keypad.
A green flash assures Jungwon that his luck hadn’t run out completely and he walks in, blinking as his eyes adjust to the darkness. Your house is eerily silent, only illuminated by the lights of the metropolis outside your windows.
"Y/N?" Jungwon calls out anxiously, moving towards your room, receiving no answer in return. Jungwon’s ears prick at the faint sobs coming from the opposite direction and he goes to your living room to find you sitting on the floor staring out the large windows. He approaches you cautiously, there's a crunch under the boot of his shoe and Jungwon looks down in confusion to find the marble covered in shards of glass and swirls of red fluid. For a moment, Jungwon’s heart drops to his stomach but he breathes a sigh of relief as the astringent smell hits his nose and he realizes the culprit is wine.
Your head turns away from the cityscape at the sound of crushed glass, brows knitting in confusion when you find Jungwon staring back at you.
"Jungwon? What are you doing here?" You ask breathily, eyes dilating as you take in his appearance.
He rakes his eyes over your figure, scanning for any trace of injury and for a second Jungwon is at a loss for words. Your eyes are rimmed red, cheeks still streaked with the remnants of tears and yet Jungwon can’t help the way his breath hitches at the sight of you under the moonlight. It’s almost hauntingly beautiful and he’s not sure he’ll ever be able to forget how you look up at him that night.
"Chenle told me what happened. ,” Jungwon starts carefully, “Your friends said that you weren't answering their calls. I was- We were worried about you,"Jungwon amends.
Your eyes prick at the reminder of what exactly had gotten you into your current state. You wipe furiously at your eyes, glaring out the window. "He shouldn't have bothered you with this shit. I'm sorry you had to come all this way Jungwon, I was just being stupid and dramatic."
A mix of shame and anger swirls at the pit of your chest at the realization that once again you had troubled and burdened your friends. You know better, you silently reprimand yourself, chewing on the inside of your cheek.
You push yourself up to your feet, ignoring Jungwon's warnings in your haste to get up. "I'll message them. You can go home I'm fine-" you wince, your words halting at the feeling of a sharp sting against your palm.
In a flash, Jungwon is by your side, firmly grabbing your wrist. "I told you to be careful. You are not fine. And I am not going to go home." He says firmly, staring into your eyes with a steely gaze.
Dumbly, you nod back at him and he huffs, looking down and examining the beads of blood that have begun to pool in the crevices of your palm. "It doesn't look that deep but we should still disinfect it and wrap it. Do you have a first aid kit?"
"In my room," you mutter . And Jungwon hums, promptly picking you up bridal style ignoring the startled gasp that escapes your lips. “There's glass on the floor," Jungwon cuts you off before you can protest, carrying you over to your room.
He pushes the door open deftly with his shoulder, setting you down on your bed. You look at him with slight amusement, entertained by how seriously Jungwon was taking his job as your caretaker.
He looks at you expectantly and you smile, “The kit’s in my bedside table, second drawer,” you offer helpfully, to which he nods and begins rummaging through your cabinet.
Unable to resist teasing any longer, you clear your throat and speak up, “You know you could've just gotten me my slippers or something instead of carrying me Jungwon,” you smirk.
You laugh as he visibly pauses mid search, mumbling a "shut up", his ears glowing a faint red. Jungwon brings the first aid kit over to you, batting your hand away as you try to take it from him.
"I can do it," you offer, pursing your lips as Jungwon deadpans at you, pulling your injured hand into his lap. "Your dominant hand is literally cut and bleeding Y/N. How are you going to disinfect and bandage this big ass gash with only one hand?"
"I’ve seen people do it all the time in movies, it can’t possibly be that hard. I’ll be fine,” you whine, trying to yank your hand away from his grasp.
Jungwon scoffs, flicking your forehead, "Stop being stubborn and just let me take care of you."
"I don't know if I can trust you to take care of me if you're assaulting your patients like this," you pout, rubbing your forehead. "At least put on a sexy nurse costume or something, it’ll make you look more reliable.”
Jungwon doesn't dignify your joke with a response, focusing instead on your wound. He carefully wipes away the blood, checking for any stray pieces of glass. With a warning, he gently presses the antiseptic to your cut, whispering an apology when you wince. He diligently bandages your hand, turning it over and tracing the bandage gingerly to make sure it's entirely secure. You watch wordlessly as Jungwon’s fingers graze the curves of your hands and fingers, his touch feather light.
Looking up at your uncharacteristic silence, Jungwon’s not quite sure what to make of the emotions that pool in your eyes. There’s a foreign intensity behind them and his eyes can't help but flicker down to your lips. The air is stifling and Jungwon wants nothing more than to close the distance, to draw the air he so desperately needs from your lips.
Instead, he opts to look away, coughing awkwardly. "All done. You should probably change" he gestures to your wine stained dress. You look at him in contemplation, noting the slight flush on the back of his neck, watching as his Adam's apple bobs up and down as he swallows, eyes trained on your wall.
Taking pity on him, you walk towards your dresser, letting the tension dissipate into the stale air. You rifle through your clothes, pulling out a pair of shorts and an oversized tee that either Chenle or Haechan had left behind during your group sleepovers.
“Turn around, I’m gonna change,” you warn half-heartedly, waiting for a beat before starting to tug your dress over your head. Jungwon immediately turns, busying himself with his phone. He shoots both Chenle and Heeseung a text, assuring both of them that everything was alright, desperately trying to block out the sounds of rustling fabric behind him.
Jungwon keeps his head bowed, eyes glued to his screen until he feels the bed dip next to him and a slight tug on the hem of his shirt. “You texted Chenle?” you ask casually, humming when he nods in confirmation.
You try to feign nonchalance but struggle to meet Jungwon’s eyes as you prepare yourself for the conversation ahead. “So, he told you?”
"Yeah." Jungwon admits quietly.
"About what happened today? Or everything.”
"Everything."
"Hm, I see.” you fiddle absentmindedly with Jungwon’s shirt, pulling at the stray threads in the frayed ends.
“I'm sorry that he told me. And I'm sure Chenle's sorry he had to tell me as well. He was just worried about you,” Jungwon prods tentatively, unsure of your reaction.
“No, I know. I get it. It’s my fault for not responding and putting him in that position in the first place.” you let out a puff of frustration. “ I just wish I could've told you everything on my terms, explained properly. This wasn’t how I wanted you to find out.”
Jungwon tucks your hair behind your ear, nudging you encouragingly, “Then do it. Explain it to me how you would’ve if today didn’t happen.”
You take a deep breath, instinctively reaching out to play with Jungwon’s fingers for a sense of comfort and give him a wobbly smile.
“So, like Chenle told you, my mom passed away a few days after giving birth to me. There were some complications during the procedure and she never recovered.
I know that my dad resents me for her death. That if he had the choice he would've chosen her over me. And I can't really blame him. The woman he fell in love with and built a whole life around, gone, and just for a baby he didn't have any attachment to yet.
At first I didn’t really understand the situation, so I did everything I could just to get even a speck of his attention. But as I grew older, I pieced together the truth from the whispers from my nannies and my dad’s staff. And then it became more than just looking for his attention, I felt like I had to prove my worth somehow. I had to prove that I wasn't just useless, that my mom hadn't given up her life for me just to amount to nothing.
I wanted to make him believe that her choice was justified. I don't think I'll ever be able to get my dad to think so. I’ve known that for a long time.” You draw a shaky breath, tears streaming down your cheeks slowly. Jungwon’s heart clenches at the sight and he pulls you into his lap, rubbing your back soothingly as you try to continue.
“But then something like this happens, he gives me the slightest indication that something might change. And it's like I'm 7 years old all over again. On that stage holding a stupid trophy that's bigger than me. Flashing lights and photographers, searching in a sea of faces for the one person that will never be there.”
“And I'm so, so, tired of being disappointed,” your voice cracks with emotion, “Tired of even having any expectations. It happens every time.”
“ He left. He knew that I was waiting for him and he just left. With nothing but a stupid bottle of wine as a gift. Not a note that said happy birthday, or even goodbye.” you mutter bitterly.
Your vision blurs with hot, angry tears, “He's never once wished me happy birthday. That's all I ever wanted from him. But he can’t give me that, he thinks spending money will help us both ignore the reality that he can’t stand to be around me. So I’m left with a bottle of wine that's as old as me and probably costs more than someone’s yearly salary. Another reminder of everything he's given me and everything I will never amount to in his eyes.”
“And I was just so mad, I picked it up and threw it against the wall. I only ended up making a huge mess and getting hurt so I guess my plan backfired,” you laugh sardonically.
“I probably should've sold it or given it to Chenle, so that was stupid of me but I just couldn't look at it anymore,” your voice dies into a soft whisper.
Jungwon tilts your face up to meet his gaze, brushing away the stray tears in the corners of your eyes.
"Happy Birthday Y/N . I'm so glad that you're here and that I’m able to be by your side. Even if that means running across the city in the middle of the night" He says, knocking his forehead against yours affectionately.
You give a watery laugh, eyes welling up at the sincerity in his tone. You lean your forehead onto Jungwon's shoulder "Thanks Yang Jungwon, it means a lot. I'm sorry for getting tears and snot all over your hoodie"
Jungwon snorts in response, smoothing over your hair, “Occupational hazard of being your best friend I guess.”
Best friend. You laugh to yourself at the absurdity of the situation. It was insane how in such a short amount of time Jungwon has carved out a space for himself in your heart. Your smile fades, your mood sobering slightly as doubts begin to creep back into the corners of your mind.
"Hey Jungwon?" you ask hesitantly.
"Yeah Y/N?"
You’re unable to meet Jungwon’s questioning gaze, resolving to play with the strings of his hoodie instead. “You’ll tell me right if I'm being too much? Before you’re sick of me?” you ask softly.
Jungwon leans back to look at your face with furrowed brows, “What the fuck are you on about Y/N, I’m not gonna get sick of you.”
You swat at Jungwon’s arm lightly, “You can't say that for sure. Everyone has limits and boundaries and unfortunately I have a tendency of finding those limits and pushing them unknowingly.”
You gesture to yourself with a wave of your hand. “This whole parental trauma, daddy issues thing, it can be a lot. And I have a bad habit of being overly attached and clingy to people. It's suffocating, I know. So just tell me okay? I’d rather know and dial it back than push you away and lose you entirely.”
Jungwon sighs and pulls you closer, placing a chaste kiss on your temple. “You're being ridiculous Y/N that's not gonna happen. I could never get sick of you. If anything you'll be sick of me.”
“Just promise me? Please?”
He rolls his eyes in exasperation, “Fine. If I wake up one day and decide that I’m suddenly sick of you, I promise you’ll be the first to know”.
“Thanks Wonnie”, you smile in satisfaction, stifling a yawn behind the back of your hand.
"Aww, is my birthday girl tired?” he teases gently, glancing at your clock. 2:14 A.M.
“You should go to sleep now Y/N" Jungwon shifts you so that you’re laying on the bed and you quickly situate yourself under the blankets. Once he’s tucked you into your bed sufficiently, Jungwon stands with a slight stretch, ignoring the way his muscles protest at the movement.
You cock your head in confusion, tugging him back by the sleeve of his hoodie "You're not staying?”
Jungwon blinks at you blankly, “I am, I'll just take the floor. Or the couch.”
You smile sleepily up at him, "Don't be stupid Jungwon." You scoot over, lifting the blanket and patting the empty space next to you in invitation.
Jungwon merely gapes at you in response and you snicker at his vacant expression.
“Jungwon, we literally cuddle in bed all the time, it's no different just because it's nighttime. Look, I'll even stay on my side of the bed okay?” You scoot back further to the edge of your bed, looking at him expectantly.
Wordlessly Jungwon huffs, kicking off his shoes and shedding his hoodie. He clambers into your bed, exhaling lowly as he turns to face you.
From the gap across the bed Jungwon watches as you give him a pleased smile, cheek squishing into the pillow and your hair splaying out behind you. He can't look away from the way your eyes shine in moonlight, staring back at him with a fondness that makes his heart stutter.
“Night night, Wonnie," you whisper playfully, reaching out to lightly pinch at Jungwon's cheek.
His eyes flutter close at the feeling of the pads of your fingers against his cheek and he groans internally.
Fuck it. Jungwon rolls his eyes in surrender, and pulls you closer to him, tucking you into the crook of his neck, a position that's way too familiar to him at this point.
And maybe Jungwon really should reevaluate where he's at because the way his hand slides to rest at the small of your back is all too natural. And the feeling of your breath against his neck should really be unsettling but it’s not.
He really should think about it, but right now it's nearly 3 AM and he doesn't have the energy to question how perfectly you fit against him. How you feel a bit too much like home.
“What happened to me staying on my side of the bed,” you ask slyly in the most innocent tone you can muster. Jungwon can feel your barely concealed smile against his collarbone and punishes your taunt with a swift tug at your hair, enticing a snicker from your lips.
"Shut up and go to sleep" he grumbles, and you laugh freely, burrowing comfortably into his arms. Jungwon can’t help but let his lips lift at the sound, and tightens his hold around you, waiting until he hears the faint puffs of your slumber before letting himself succumb to his dreams.
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a/n: chenle rlly is jungwon's biggest supporter asjks carrying the y/nwon ship.
my longest chapter yet hhh i hope y'all enjoyed . I kinda cringed but :) lmk ur thoughts n feelings . Jett voice: night night!
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@woncloudie @itsactuallylina @ifearjwn @fadedluvv @mangowonyo @xiaoderrrr @shinsou-rii @aki1e @makiswrld @jaehaki @criyiy @ilovewonyo @zeraaax @climbingmandevillas @pkjay @flower-lise @koudnd @beomgyusonlywife
01.Company besties
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02.Yn out of the flop era
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03. What the actual fuck
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04.HYBE's solution
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06. Mint choco ice cream
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07.Sunshine to my midnight rain
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08.The announcement
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09.Crackwhores
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10.Stay in drugs don't do school
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11.Be there or be square
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PART ONE : Forget sunghoon
☆ 𝑪𝑨𝑻 𝑭𝑼𝑹 . . . yang jungwon a boy allergic to cat fur who risks his life everyday just to get a glance at the pretty girl who works behind the counter at manifesto cat cafe. ☕️
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PART TWO : he just doesn’t get it
☆ 𝑪𝑨𝑻 𝑭𝑼𝑹 . . . yang jungwon a boy allergic to cat fur who risks his life everyday just to get a glance at the pretty girl who works behind the counter at manifesto cat cafe
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PART THREE : Bunny? no Cat? yes
☆ 𝑪𝑨𝑻 𝑭𝑼𝑹 . . . yang jungwon a boy allergic to cat fur who risks his life everyday just to get a glance at the pretty girl who works behind the counter at manifesto cat cafe
☆ TAG LIST : @advre-you @woncine @chaechae-23 @jaehyunsblkgf @yeomha comment or send ask to be added !
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PART FOUR : which one is the real cat ?
“ Yang Jungwon I swear to god if you sneeze near me one more time!” sunoo scolds. “ Put the cat down,” he orders. Jungwon frowns gently placing the cat onto the floor. Kneeling down next to it as it rubs itself against his hand. Purring softly.
“But hyung it’s so cute…” Jungwon argued giving the small animal one last pet before standing up.
“ I know they’re cute but your eyes are looking puffy and your nose is red, take a breather outside then you can come back in okay?”
“Okay.” jungwon sighs moving to the back to quickly wash his hands before leaving through the back door of the cafe.
He sits down on one of the wooden benches busying himself with his phone. Mindlessly strolling through randoms apps, sniffling as his nose continues to itch.
Not even noticing as someone approached him until he feels a soft hand on his shoulder.
“ Hey are you okay?” a worried voice asks pulling jungwon attention from his phone.
Holy shit…
“ um yeah, I’m fine just getting some … air.” Jungwon replies doing his best to not stumble over his words.
“ your eyes are super red.” Y/n points out a small pout resting on her lips, her eyes filled with worry.
She must’ve thought the he was crying.
“I have a cat allergy this is just a reaction to the fur that’s all,” Jungwon explains he can see the way the girl's face morphs into a more relieved expression .
“ oh! I’m sorry for bothering you then I thought you were crying.” Y/n says embarrassed.
“ No, it’s okay, thanks for checking up on me.”
“ no problem…”
“ Jungwon.” he finishes holding out his hand praying to God that the blush on his cheeks wasn’t too noticeable as the girl repeated his name to herself seemingly recognizing him before shaking his hand.
“ I’m y/n!” she smiled before either could pull their hands away the metal door opens revealing sunghoon. Jungwon groans internally.
“ Y/n! You’re finally here thank god sunoo is 5 seconds away from killing me. could you please help me clean the litter boxes? and their food trays.” Sunghoon rambles before looking down at their hands.
“Oh, you met jungwonie ! remember the one you called cute.” Sunghoon states earning a glare from the younger.
“Will you just get inside,” Y/n shouts hitting his shoulder before walking inside leaving a flustered jungwon sat in his same spot.
“ It was nice meeting you … ” jungwon starts though his sentence dies out as sunghoon laughs at him shaking his head.
“ Why are you so annoying.” Jungwon whined. “yeah yeah what ever come on in.” sunghoon chuckles pulling the boy back inside.
☆ 𝑪𝑨𝑻 𝑭𝑼𝑹 . . . yang jungwon a boy allergic to cat fur who risks his life everyday just to get a glance at the pretty girl who works behind the counter at manifesto cat cafe
☆ TAG LIST : @advre-you @woncine @chaechae-23 @jaehyunsblkgf @yeomha comment or send ask to be added!
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PART FIVE : Now we wait…
☆ 𝑪𝑨𝑻 𝑭𝑼𝑹 . . . yang jungwon a boy allergic to cat fur who risks his life everyday just to get a glance at the pretty girl who works behind the counter at manifesto cat cafe. ☕️
☆ TAG LIST : @advre-you @woncine @chaechae-23 @jaehyunsblkgf @yeomha @yumilovesloona @stqrlite @kimsunoo2003 @gg1609 @mrowwww @rikimylove @jwsflower
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