You Are Worth Dying For - Tumblr Posts

4 years ago

I wanted to be a savior

But what does that even mean?

Who has the right?

My arrogance has known no bounds.

My momma raised me blessedly

And yet I have found myself lacking.

I saw the world through a certain lense

Fractured

But more idealized than is real.

I sat on God's throne

Loved and hated

Saw my own hypocrisy

And here I am.

Who deserves to stand over another?

Who deserves to look down and see someone else?

It is its own crime;

Who is able to defend it?

I have hated

Yes

I have loved.

Seen my own soul

And wondered at the world.

No one is good

And no one is evil.

More often than not

Whoever claims one is wrong.

I have seen my own sin.

Been so crushed by it

I was willing to kill myself.

To die

To be sacrificed;

To find myself upon my own alter

Because I could not deal with my own guilt.

But this too was for me.

A selfish act designed to make me feel special.

All I have loved is me

And because of this

I can't forget the world.

If I exist

So must everyone else.

If I gave a right to be

Then so do all the others.

My mother taught me this

But in this world

I have not seen it.

Only in that which I imagine can it be

While in my day to day

Violence reigns over all.

Because of this I hate

Yet still I crave its destruction.

The bloodrhirst of God

That has defined all my days.

Ever since that bastard first came into my room

God of all creation

A shadow on my wall.

My own darkness

Masquerading as light

Preaching from their pullpits

A lie who spreads the truth.

I am a convoluted thought;

A twisted notion of what is right.

Equal parts saving

As I am killing everyone.

A monstrous thing to say.

If only everyone could be so honest.

How many would gladly end all the noise

If only they could sleep soundly.

This is all for me.

I don't do it for anyone.

In privacy I belong to the masses

But her I say what I will.

I have hungered

And fed.

Gluttoned on reality.

I would devour all that is

Of only to create

A new world for myself.

I am all that is.

All that can be known.

For only I am me

And only myself can I understand.

This is what I hope for all.

That they be free to live and die.

All eternity

Stretched for them.

Infinite layers

Of their own psyche.

I can't adequately explain it.

We have auto text now.

Daily we become more like God

Ever unraveling

The very notion of what God is.

Turns out

God was never more than us

And we were never more than them

Deafened by the noise;

A fool trying to answer life.

This is all I know;

That I am nothing,

But only as I compare

Myself to all others.

So live

Breath

Drink and have sex.

Who will judge you but yourself,

It is actually easy

To convict god in his own court of law.

I have done it.

You will do it.

God so hated themself that they blotted out their soul.

Burn it.

Burn the image.

All that is sacred is you.

Everything else is coming down,

Save your own soul

In what ever form that means.

We are all children

Before god's world breaks us.

Will you damn a child?

Can you condemn such sin?


Tags :