Wheel-talk

Wheel-talk

I'm flaring, severely. Everything hurts, the world is spinning, nausea is overwhelming, and I'm dizzy from blood loss, along with a myriad of other things: it's not fun. But I went to a museum with mum today, and instead of being stubborn and walking it on a cane, asked if they had a wheelchair that I could borrow.

It was amazing.

As embarrassing as it is to be a teen in a wheelchair (I got some stares and commentary from strangers), it was so freeing. Instead of hobbling around, leaning on things and trying not to faint, I could explore. Look at things. Read. Do wheelies (much to my mother's horror). Spin around and move at a speed I hadn't in years, as my body usually wouldn't let me, and I wasn't tied to leaning against walls and feeling sick.

and I had energy left over to complete chores.

I wouldn't be able to visit a museum, or for that matter.. anywhere, during a flare. But today? Because I had wheels? It was amazing.

It was nice having that freedom. So much so I talked to my mother and asked if we could discuss getting a wheelchair for when the pain is bad…

That went less well.

// slight ableist talk //

She doesn't want me relying on it to get around. She doesn't want me to rely on wheels to get around because she doesn't want me being bed bound, to lose muscle or something like that.

I understand where she's coming from, but… it's so frustrating when that was the first time I felt good in weeks… and having that option might actually give me more time to do things I enjoy.

but she doesn't want me being “that disabled”

a cane is bad enough in her eyes

(and don't get me started on how my father would react if he knew I'd used a wheelchair)

and I don't know what to do...

help?

listen. if you had an abusive parent who is good at behaving themselves around other people- ones who stay calm, and smile, and speak kindly when interacting with the public despite never doing that with you? you’re amazing. if you had to hear “your dad seems cool” or “i love your mom” and nod and feel the way they hurt you go unnoticed? you’re so strong.

it can feel like you’re making it up, because all your teachers really like them. or it can sting, when you see how theyre capable of being thoughtful and polite but they choose to hurt you anyways. but you are wonderful, and brave, and things will get better. you will have people who acknowledge how they treated you. you will thrive. keep fighting.

everything hurts and im sick of being sick

hi we have 2 question that a somewhat related !!

is it possible to be a polyfragmented osdd 1 system?

is it did if you have greyout amnesia between switches but have blackout for your childhood?

weve been questioning if were polyfragmented but just have a LOT of fragments we dont know about

The answer to your first question is no, as DID and OSDD have different types of dissociation, as OSDD is secondary while DID and polyfragmented / complex DID are tertiary. This basically means OSDD cannot be polyfragmented due to polyfragmented requiring more dissociation / less integration

((link for image 1)) , ((link for image 2))

And for your second question I guess it depends? Most sources say people with OSDD1 will have less amnesia or no amnesia (this is mainly for OSDD1b though, I'm not 100% sure if its the same for OSDD1a). So I guess yes? But also most sources say its specifically for switching? ((By most sources I mean the only two sources I can find—)). So take this how you will

((sorry I'm kind of useless for this question, it's hurting my brain, but I hope the sources help))

" The main difference between DID and OSDD is that individuals with OSDD do not have the same severity of loss of time or amnesia when there is a “switch” to a different state/part. "

" OSDD-1 is the subtype that is most similar to dissociative identity disorder (DID). It is used for individuals who have similar symptoms to those with DID but who do not meet the full diagnostic criteria for DID. Most commonly, this describes individuals who have dissociative parts that are not sufficiently differentiated to qualify as alters (sometimes known as OSDD-1a) or individuals who do not have amnesia between alters (sometimes known as OSDD-1b). Some individuals with OSDD-1 lack both amnesia and highly distinct parts, and other individuals with OSDD-1 have highly distinct parts but rarely or never switch between them. These latter cases are also sometimes described as OSDD-1b. "

@littleramblingsofalargemind mmmm

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