Respectfully, If I Would Live In Ancient Greece I Would Be SIGNIFICANTLY More Scared By Dionysus Than

Respectfully, if I would live in Ancient Greece I would be SIGNIFICANTLY more scared by Dionysus than by Hades.

Helios: You know, sometimes the woman a man marries usually resembles his mother.

Hephaestus: What is that even supposed to mean?

Helios: That she'll probably love your brother more.

Hephaestus: ...

Hephaestus: I hate you.

Helios: The sentiment is mutual.

Hephaestus: Why are you roasting me in the first place? What did I do to you?

Helios: It's not about what you did to me. It's about what you didn't do to my daughter, Aglaea.

Hephaestus: Namely?

Helios: You know... holding hands, kissing, cuddling naked...

Hephaestus: Okay, no need to continue. I see what you mean now.

Helios: Great, I didn't want to continue either.

Hephaestus: Do you want me to marry her?

Helios: She always wanted to marry you. Not sure if she's be able to stand an asshole like you though.

Hephaestus: She is.

Helios: How do you know that?

Hephaestus: Sometimes the man a woman marries usually resembles her father.

Helios: ...

Helios: Touché.

Note: Aglaea is sometimes considered Helios' daughter. While this version is less common, the idea of Helios telling Hephaestus the truth about his wife so that Aglaea could have a chance with him is hilarious.

For more context: Just found a post where somebody responded to an anonymous ask and explained why they consider Perseus to be a misogynist and Medusa a victim. And this part particularly pissed me off the most.

Just to make it clear: If someone claims that "Perseus kidnapped Andromeda." and that it is said that she was in love with him just because the myth was written from his pov, but is willing to believe that "In the ORIGINAL myth of Hades and Persephone he didn't kidnap her." then I'm not going to take them seriously.

Finding out that I'm not supposed to buy clothes only three times per year and wear pajamas at home was one of the most dissapointing things when I firstly got into high school.

Okay but ignoring 99,99% of Zagreus' myth versions (which by extension leads to the erasure of his original relevance in Orphic Greek Mythology) and making him the son of Hades is shallow.

Now, I do understand the fact that fanfiction is here for people's headcanons and reinterpretations. Because what's the point of writing a Greek Mythology fanfic if you're not going to change or add anything new anyway? As long as you're not going to claim your own version of Greek Mythology to be canon (bonus points if you encourage people to read the original ancient written works) then there isn't anything inherently harmful in doing that.

But Zagreus particularly is an interesting case, and that because his relevance resides in his death, reincarnation, and overall his title as the first Dionysus.

By this marriage with the heavenly Drakon, the womb of Persephone swelled with living fruit, and she bore Zagreus the horned baby, who by himself climbed upon the heavenly throne of Zeus and brandished lightning in his little hand, and newly born, lifted and carried thunderbolts in his tender fingers [i.e. Zeus marked him as his heir]. But he did not hold the throne of Zeus for long. By the fierce resentment of implacable Hera, the Titanes (Titans) cunningly smeared their round faces with disguising chalk, and while he contemplated his changeling countenance reflected in a mirror they destroyed him with an infernal knife. There where his limbs had been cut piecemeal by the Titan steel, the end of his life was the beginning of a new life as Dionysos. He appeared in another shape, and changed into many forms : now young like crafty Kronides (Cronides) [Zeus] shaking the aegis-cape, now as ancient Kronos (Cronus) heavy-kneed, pouring rain. Sometimes he was a curiously formed baby, sometimes like a mad youth with the flower of the first down marking his rounded chin with black. Again, a mimic lion he uttered a horrible roar in furious rage from a wild snarling throat, as he lifted a neck shadowed by a thick mane, marking his body on both sides with the self-striking whip of a tail which flickered about over his hairy back. Next, he left the shape of a lion's looks and let out a ringing neigh, now like an unbroken horse that lifts his neck on high to shake out the imperious tooth of the bit, and rubbing, whitened his cheek with hoary foam. Sometimes he poured out a whistling hiss from his mouth, a curling horned serpent covered with scales, darting out his tongue from his gaping throat, and leaping upon the grim head of some Titan encircled his neck in snaky spiral coils. Then he left the shape of the restless crawler and became a tiger with gay stripes on his body; or again like a bull emitting a counterfeit roar from his mouth he butted the Titanes with sharp horn. So he fought for his life, until Hera with jealous throat bellowed harshly through the air--that heavy-resentful step-mother! And the gates of Olympos rattled in echo to her jealous throat from high heaven. Then the bold bull collapsed: the murderers each eager for his turn with the knife chopt piecemeal the bull-shaped Dionysos [Zagreus].

Do not get me wrong, the myth itself is very disturbing and covers a lot of depressing themes which you simply cannot overlook, since they play a major role in this story. But this is exactly why this myth particularly is morbidly fascinating in the first place. It also adds more dynamic to the relationships between the characters and makes a lot of further events and aspects (Hera suggesting Semele to ask Zeus to reveal his real form to her, Persephone raising Dionysus in some versions of his myth, Demeter's panic and desperation when her daughter was kidnapped, Dionysus' violent and dark side etc.) way more understandable.

Now, I know the fact that Timothy Gantz considered Zagreus to be a stand-alone deity who later got sincretized with the Orphic Dionysus, or that Aeschylus identified Zagreus either as Hades' son, or as Hades' himself (which are basically the arguments people who desperately want Zagreus to be the son of Hades and Persephone would choose to go by for the rest of their lives):

Aeschylus, Fragment 124 Sisyphus (from Etymologicum Gudianum 227. 40) (trans. Weir Smyth) (Greek tragedy C5th B.C.) : "Now [I came] to bid farewell to Zagreus and to his sire, the Hospitaler." [N.B. In this fragment Sisyphos describes his departure from the Underworld. Haides is the "Hospitaler of the Dead" and as husband of Persephone is the father of chthonic Zagreus.]

However, I'm more inclined to believe that preserving in one way or another Zagreus' myth and Dionysus' background story respectively is way more compelling, and also remains true to the original Greek Mythology. In fact, I can think of numerous ideas just by following this myth:

a) Persephone's whole process of maturizing herself and struggling with her trauma throughout the years would make her a more complex figure compared to the usual Mary Sue/Self-Insert that I've usually seen in many fanfictions featuring her; (though I will be honest and say that this requires great writing skills so that her trauma could be treated with respect instead of turning the entire situation into sad porn)

b) This would also help in portraying Dionysus as a complex, broken character. Imagine him still remembering his past life and perceiving it as an old yet painful memory, or his previous death being one of the reasons why he has a dark, violent side that he's not afraid to show when he's challenged. It would be much better than the shallow drunk party animal he's often depicted as.

c) Persephone and Semele meeting in the Underworld and sharing each other's sufference after losing their child. It would also make the myth where Dionysus goes into the Underworld and receives Persephone's permission of rescuing his mother more nuanced.

d) For those who desperately want Zagreus to be Hades' child: Persephone gives birth centuries later to another son whom she also named Zagreus, in the memory of the one whom she lost a very long time ago.

There are a lot of great headcanons and interpretations to play with. Just have more courage and try to explore more dark themes and subjects, rather than stick to the Vanilla Greek Mythology.

Sarah J. Maas and the long-term consequences left by romanticizing abusive relationships and downplaying toxic men's vile actions while portraying the actual decent guys as abusive and toxic.

‘Feminist’ retelling be like “they called Medusa a monster just for being ugly 😔😭” and then design her like this: