Heres A Reminder To Go Masturbate Instead Of Engaging In That Incendiary Argument Going On On Your Social

heres a reminder to go masturbate instead of engaging in that incendiary argument going on on your social media feed

Next time, greet the clown with a loud “Choo choo!” Show them what you think of being railroaded like that.

I was having a good dream until I got in a car with a killer clown. After I was murdered, I realized it was a dream and decided to keep on replaying the dream until I didn’t get in the car with the clown (who drove a red mustang). No matter what I did, I somehow kept on getting killer-clowned. I ended up waking up annoyed.

Head is like pizza: If you don’t think it can be really bad, you’ve either never had the bad stuff, or never had the good stuff.

"better" head this, "better" head that

can head truly be better or worse? is any flower better than any other? i believe there is only different head, not better or worse

Okay, but those clearly aren’t her eyes. She has eyes in her head. So whose are they?

st. lucy holding her eyes

in an illuminated prayer book, bavaria, c. 1480

source: Munich, BSB, Cgm 7251, fol. 187r

Well? Is your car prepared, or are they going to get bullied out of mating by other cars?

Happy holidays!

Image description: A drawing of a small car fitted with decorative plush antlers and a Rudolph nose. A banner proclaims “Happy Holidays!” and a label pointing to the antlers says “Don’t forget to prepare your car for the rut”.

I know this is a general complaint, but I’ve found referring to specific subsections of said body parts helps.

it's actually so funny how challenging it is to write bona fide graphic, horny smut. like people don't give smut writers enough credit. you are constantly running out of words to describe the same 2-4 body parts and same 4-6 motions. you are constantly attempting to do interesting and dynamic things in the prose with this extremely limited set of words. you are looking at your prose for the nastier bits and wondering if it actually sounds hot or if it just sounds goofy. you are then toning down your prose and then wondering if it now sounds tasteful or if it's just boring. you do ctrl+F for the word "cock" and there are 37 instances of it in the doc but you hate the 1-2 acceptable synonyms so there's nothing much you can do about it