QUESTION IDEAS #11

QUESTION IDEAS #11

Some more question-based dialogue to include in your writing. (Be creative and use these in any context you desire)

“Is everything okay?”

“What are you smiling about?”

“Did you hear that?”

“What’s in it for me?”

“Isn’t that weird?”

“What do you mean?”

“Is something bothering you?”

“Do you even care anymore?”

“Where have you been?”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Why are you following me?”

“How long was I asleep?”

“Does this help?”

“Isn’t this what you wanted?”

“Can this wait until tomorrow?

"Do you ever stop talking?”

“What do we do now?”

“Can you please just leave me alone?”

“Does this seem normal to you?”

“What did you want to talk to me about?”

Hello! I need some advice. How to write a character that lost someone they love and fell in love again? I want to avoid the "learn how to love again" cliche and I dont want their new love interest to "fix" the loneliness. Any tips, please? (also I apologize for any mistakes, english ia not my native language)

Ah, good question! I've been working with a character like this myself.

Writing a new love interest will nearly always depend on the emotions your character has about their last love. So, if by "lost" you mean "died" they might be looking for different things in a new lover than if there was a bad breakup.

I'm going under the assumption you meant this character died. In that case, grief can be expressed in many ways. Some people jump right back into love to "fix" how bad they feel. Other people need some time or perhaps a long time to heal from the loss and feel ready to try again. There is sometimes also guilt because new love seems like disloyalty to their old partner. However, when they overcome these obstacles they can find peace and comfort in new love, even if they still feel pain from time to time.

The love interest may share attractive qualities with the lost lover, or they may complement the mourning character in different ways. Perhaps the last love was better for the character at that stage in their life, but this new person is better for who they are now. Even if the new lover doesn't understand the grief your character feels, they should seem empathetic and patient. Once you decide what your mourning character needs, it will be easier to write a lover that fulfills those needs.

Avoiding the "fix-it" relationship is pretty simple. Here are some things you might consider:

allow your character to heal before they meet their new love interest, or at least before developing feelings for them

let the romance develop gradually once they've already been friends for a while so it feels more natural

the love interest too can choose to pause the relationship until the mourning character is emotionally ready for it

if the love interest feels your character is just using them for comfort, they might end the relationship

a love interest that knows they're in a "fix-it" relationship and continues being in it is probably taking advantage of your character and aren't a great person

There are other ways you might discover too, and it really is okay for a new relationship to help a character heal as long as it's balanced. A relationship that's heavily skewed toward "repairing" a love interest tends to lead to a bad relationship. It can also reinforce sexist ideas that women exist to repair broken men, that men do not understand how to care for themselves emotionally, or that women are too emotional to get "better" without a "rational" man's help. So I'm glad you're concerned about this! Just remember that comfort and emotional support between potential lovers when one is in a weak emotional state is good to portray. I'm sure you'll do it well!

Dealing with negative feedback as a writer

I've recently gone through the critique partner/alpha reader/beta reader process. I gave people the book I'd been working on for 4 years and asked them to criticize it and pull it apart. To give me their honest opinions. And even though I asked for it, getting negative feedback still sucks every time.

So, here are a few ways in which I've tried to lessen the blow:

1. Rather than sorting feedback into negative/positive, sort it into useful/not useful

You may think that only the negative comments are important. Because that's what you need to fix, right?

Well, I've come to recognize that not all criticism is helpful and not all positive feedback is useless for editing.

The important question when sifting through feedback is: does this point out a particular aspect that can and should be changed?

Some negative comments that are actually not helpful include subjective preferences, generalization and mean-spirited criticism.

If someone says: "I don't like the swearing in the book." - this is subjective. This reader does not like books with many curse words. However, other readers might like the candid narration or dialogue you've achieved with the swear words. Of course, if many of the readers point out that the swearing is so intense that it distracts from the plot, that could be useful feedback. But if it's just one reader, you shouldn't change your manuscript to suit them. You should also keep in mind that readers of a different genre won't always like your book, but that's completely subjective.

Broad/general negative statements also aren't useful. This would be something like "I don't like the book". This can hurt very much, but you have to realize that it's fine to throw out this type of feedback and forget it ever came your way. Because it doesn't help you make the book better. It doesn't address any specific aspect. It doesn't help you understand the problem. And it sure as hell doesn't indicate what you should edit.

99.9% of the time, a mean-spirited comment won't be useful. Because that person isn't trying to help. They're tearing you down and being a prick. Realize that this is more of a projection of their own insecurities than a reflection of the quality of your work. I had a beta reader who gave me incredibly condescending/mocking feedback and I removed him from my beta list immediately. I can take constructive criticism. I don't have to tolerate a dick.

Then, there could also be positive feedback that can help you edit the manuscript. If some comments: "I love character Y, because she has a very clear goal", that may indicate that you need to strengthen the goals of your other characters.

2. Consolidate the useful feedback

I know that when getting negative feedback you just want to crawl into a hole and never look at any of it again.

But, the whole reason you asked for feedback was to help you make the book better. So, you're gonna have to work through those comments.

Once you know which feedback is useful, I suggest making a separate edit document in which you simply list the things you need to look at during your next round of edits.

This way, the notes are in your own words and they are neutral. You don't have to look at the negative comments themselves ever again.

3. Don't disregard the positive comments

I feel like it's human nature to focus on the negative. Especially when looking toward edits, we tend to blind ourselves to all the good feedback.

Don't

Even though it might not be directly relevant to your next round of edits, positive feedback that doesn't point out anything you should change is still valuable.

For your writing career, it's always good to know what your strengths are.

And if you save the praise, you can always revisit it for a morale boost when self-doubt or imposter syndrome gets you down.

Reblog if you found this post useful. Comment with your own tips on handling feedback. Follow me for similar content.

Living Together Trope

A trope I’ve recently kind of gotten fascinated by.

Characters forced to live together because of:

- poverty (”If we live together we can split the cost, more money for food!”)

- convenience (”Hey, uh, the subway & my fav restaurant are just around the corner so can we…?”)

- secret attraction (”Damn…he’s hot.”)

- forced circumstances (”Listen, we don’t have enough cells to detain you so you’ll be living with me temporarily.” “Oh great, sharing living quarters with a cop. Must be my lucky day.”)

- protection (”I’m sorry this isn’t the safest neighbourhood, but you’ll be safe here.”)

- aesthetic (”I love this apartment! It’s beautiful!” , “Well, I like it too.” “…I’m calling dibs on the bed!”)

- agreement (”You cook for me in exchange for using my art room for your work, deal?”)

Tag your ships/characters/message me  and I’ll try to write a one shot about them!

BTW: You can also choose which reason for living together they have!

Hi, I'm working on a series but I'm having trouble mapping it out. Any tips?

Hello! I have a few:

Don’t outline every single event before you even start writing the first draft of the first book. You’ll burn yourself out. Know when it’s time to leave some planning for later.

Focus more on how to build up multiple different paths for your story from the beginning. If you only plan for your story going one way and ending one way, your readers will find your story predictable and boring. Leave some mystery for yourself.

Plan the major turning points in the series, and create smaller scenes and subplots that will build up those major events. 

Plan visually. Create a literal picture of your plot and its progression. I recommend making story maps. I make a story map for every single one of my stories and it is insane how much seeing my story physically laid out in front of me helps. Even if you think it won’t do you any good, there’s no harm in trying. 

Keep track of every location, every character, every event, every world detail, etc. and keep that information handy for when you’re planning or writing. When you map out a series, you can easily forget details you’ve already figured out or lose track of characters, etc. You want to know your story inside out, so make that easier for yourself.

Don’t forget to plan your character development. Be intentional with the scenes you plan to reveal character development in. 

Hope this helps! 

x Kate

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