Blix313 - Tumblr Blog

Plus One

Pairing: Non Idol!Lee Felix x afab reader

Request: No

Theme: Roommates to Lovers

Contains: Fluffiest fluff, cursing, suggestive themes.

Word Count: 4,798 words

Note: This is a work of fiction and does not portray any of the members irl. I might make a part two to this if y'all are interested!

_

When you moved into town you were DESPERATE for a new roommate, you asked everyone and it turns out that a friend of a friend of an old college roommate had someone he knew who was looking for a roommate. It felt like the universe was on your side when you heard the news and you almost cried from happiness, but there was a catch (of course there was) the roommate was a dude.

Now the thing is usually you wouldn't mind rooming with a guy, you've lived with quite a few and other than them leaving messes for you to clean up occasionally they had all been pretty decent. You were worried because you had never met this Felix guy before so you had absolutely no idea what to expect. But everyone who had met the guy swore up and down that he was a great guy, very respectful, and made killer brownies, so you decided to meet up with him in person to judge for yourself.

The day came that you were supposed to meet up with Felix at a local café and get to know him, see if you would get along. You decided that if he was going to live with you it didn't really matter what you looked like, so you popped on your favorite oversized hoodie and a pair of leggings and made your way to the café. When you got there you shot him a text to let him know where you were sitting after grabbing an iced coffee. After what felt like five seconds you heard someone clearing their throat.

"Y/N?"

You looked up to see who the crazy deep voice belonged to and almost jumped out of your seat when your eyes laid on the most gorgeous person you'd ever seen. He looked like a fae creature, his long blonde hair caressing his face, the freckles across his cheeks looked like beautiful constellations, and he was dressed in a button-up layered under a beige sweater-vest and perfectly fitted blue jeans. Your brain did a hard reset and you realized he had asked you a question.

"Oh, shit, sorry, yeah I'm Y/N, you must be Felix?"

He smiled and you swore he looked like a ray of sunshine come down to Earth, you had to stop yourself from staring as he let out a low chuckle.

"Yep that's me! Am I not what you expected? You look... kinda shocked to be honest." he lightly chuckled and ran his hand over the nape of his neck.

"Oh no! Sorry I didn't really have expectations, I just feel like I should've dressed nicer is all." you looked down and cringed at your outfit choice.

"Oh! No worries! I think you look great!" He flashed you a toothy smile and slid into the seat next to you. "So, what do you want to know? I'm pretty much an open book!"

~✨~

That was six months ago. Six very long months of living with the most gorgeous creature to ever walk the Earth. You had to tell yourself at least once a day to get your shit together and stop ogling your roommate whenever he did the smallest thing like stretch his arms up to reveal a sliver of his lower abdomen or bake you brownies when work had you stressed out.

Not to mention his habit of touching and cuddling you.

His friends had warned you when you first met them that Felix loved skinship and he would probably break down your personal bubble like he did to all of them. But NOTHING could have prepared you for the amount of physical affection this man gave you. It started small of course, testing the waters, knees touching on the sofa during your weekly movie nights, holding your hand when you went out so you didn't get separated, things like that. But over time knee touching became full on cuddle sessions on the couch while you watched your favorite movies. Holding your hand at the bar became a hand wrapped around your waist. Eventually Felix had come to you in the middle of the night because his insomnia was acting up and he couldn't sleep and you offered to let him cuddle you. Now you two spent almost every night in your bed together.

It was honestly really nice. You hadn't dated anyone in years and you desperately craved physical affection. Nobody would guess it by looking at you, but secretly, you were just as much of a cuddle bug as Felix was.

The only problem is with every lingering touch, every time he fell asleep in your arms, you fell harder for him.

This became abundantly clear last Tuesday when he came bouncing through the apartment like someone had just given him a puppy.

~✨~

"Y/N~ guess whaaaattttt!!"

"What's up 'Lix?"

"My work is throwing a huge end of year party and I GET TO BRING A PLUSSS OOONNEEEE!!" He looked positively giddy at the idea of bringing a plus one, but you didn't know why. Felix is also going through a romantic dryspell.

"Is that so? Who are you planning on asking? Some cute girl got your eye?" As soon as the words left your mouth you saw the tips of his ears go pink and he looked down at his feet. "Oh. My. God. Does 'Lixxie have a crush on someone?" You teased him, but deep inside you were devastated at the thought of Felix being with someone else.

"No, nothing like that..." Felix trailed off then his eyes met yours and your heart ached at the sight. His cheeks were now a bright pink and he looked so bashful.

"Oh I'm sorry for teasing 'Lixxie you know anyone would be lucky to have you!" You said it sincerely because you really did mean it. Anyone would be lucky to have Felix in their life.

"It's okay, I was actually excited because I wanted to see if you'd come with me..." He looked away and then his eyes met yours again, filled with panic. "I mean not like a date or anything you're justoneofmybestfrie-"

"Felix," you saw his panic and cut him off "no worries, I would love to go with you!" You gave him a big smile. "Plus I would love to meet all the coworkers you've told me about!"

He let out a sigh of relief and smiled back at you. "Okay awesome! Its next Friday at 7pm, the dress is cocktail attire. I know you don't have a ton of clothes like that so I was thinking maybe this weekend we could go shopping? I want to find something to wear as well!" He positively beamed at you. Felix LOVES shopping, but he hates to go alone so you know that he would be really bummed if you said no.

"Of course I'll come with you 'Lix, who else would be able to tell me if my dress looks good or not." You started giggling at the thought of bringing one of the other guys you hung out with dress shopping. "I mean I could always ask Hyunjin but you know how he is." Felix busted out laughing at that, no doubt remembering the time you tore your dress on a fence before going to the bar with the guys and Hyunjin complemented your 'grunge' look before you told him that you had ripped it on the way in.

"Okay so let's hit the mall on Saturday?"

"Sounds good to me!"

~✨~

That is what led to your current situation, going to what felt like 5 billion stores (actually three) and watching your incredibly attractive roommate try on suit after suit.

"Y/N what about this one?"

You looked up to see him clad in a gorgeous blue suit that seemed to fit him just right. You had to stop yourself from literally drooling on the department store floor when he twirled around for you.

"It looks incredible 'Lix, like it was made for you!"

"You've said that about like the last three suits I've tried on." he rolls his eyes and inspects himself in the mirror.

"Well I can't help that all of these fit perfectly on you!" you weren't lying, the last three suits literally looked like they were tailored specifically with him in mind.

"Y/N!" Felix looks over at you and takes your face in his hands, his face is so close you can feel his breath on your nose. "I've just had the most amazing idea."

You tried to hide your blushing face by putting your hands over his and covering more of your face. "What idea?" You ask, trying not to sound too out of breath.

"We should go get you a dress and when we find the perfect one we can come back and I'll get a suit to match you!" He jumps back raising his hands in the air beaming while waiting to hear your response.

The thought of you and Felix matching at this party made your heart flutter a bit, to anyone who didn't know you, you would look like a couple. That thought alone made you feel all sorts of things you should not feel about your roommate. But, despite that, you answered.

"I think that's a great idea 'Lix!"

The look on his face was one of pure joy when you agreed. He runs into the dressing room to switch back into his own clothes leaving behind a VERY flustered roommate.

You looked in the mirror and saw the red tinting your cheeks and hoped that by some miracle Felix didn't notice how flushed you got just from the idea of coordinating outfits (who blushes at that?) you put your cold hands on your cheeks to calm the redness down and waited for Felix to get out of the dressing room so you could go to the dress store next.

~✨~

If there's one thing on this Earth that you hate, it is trying on clothes. It is your personal hell. You hate the way nothing seems to fit, everything is itchy, the dressing rooms are always way too hot and make your face bright red, and the fluorescent lights make everything look that much worse. Your only saving grace today was Felix. Your ray of sunshine, always making sure to complement you but also give you actual feedback.

"No definitely not this one, you'll be way too uncomfortable with the sleeves all night." You smiled at how well he knows you, the sleeves were already bugging you and you knew that you would want to rip them off if you had to spend a whole night in this awful dress.

You had tried on like 50 dresses by now (actually 10) and none of them had the WOW factor, but luck would have it that #51 (11) was in fact the winner. It had a beautiful high neck with a patterned cut down the front to show off your 'assets', it was the perfect length, and it was covered in gorgeous silver glittery designs. This was the one, you were sure of it.

"Hey 'Lix?" you called out from the dressing room.

"What's up gorgeous?" You knew he was getting tired because he tended to call you things like 'beautiful' and 'gorgeous' when he got sleepy, which did not help your situation whatsoever, but it was quite cute.

"I found the dress, but I was thinking, I think it should be a surprise!"

"How are we supposed to match if I don't see the dress?"

"Well I could show you a bit of the fabric? Then you could go off of that?"

"Okay darling that sounds lovely." darling? That was a new one. Thankfully you had time for the massive blush that crept up your cheeks due to the new nickname to dissipate as you changed your clothes. Once you got out your cheeks were just a light pink.

Felix perked up as you walked out holding the dress behind your back and you went over to the checkout. After purchasing the dress you showed Felix a bit of the fabric from the bag and he started giggling. "I like that we are making this a surprise, I think it'll be fun!" And with that you both went to the men's section so Felix could find a matching suit.

Thankfully it didn't take too much time, he found a match almost right away and (of course) it fit him perfectly, or so he told you. He said since your outfit was a surprise, his should be too.

Clothes in hand you drove the two of you back home to get some much needed rest. As soon as you got through the door Felix shot you a devilish look and ran toward your bedroom and flopped down on your bed. You walked in, chuckling lightly, and asked him what he was doing.

"I think it is nap time and naps are always the best with a budddyyyyyy!" He held his arms out and made grabby hands at you. You burst out laughing and headed over to the bed. As soon as you were within his arms reach he pulled you down next to him and started spooning you.

"Y/N, you're my best friend, you know that?" He sleepily whispered to you. You felt your breath hitch at his small confession, but before you could respond you heard his breathing even out and he was asleep. You sighed and pulled the covers up over the two of you and decided that a nap with Felix wasn't the worst thing in the world. So you closed your eyes and drifted off to sleep.

~✨~

All week Felix was so excited about his work party is was basically all he could talk about when the group went out for dinner on Wednesday.

"Y/N and I are matching but we haven't seen each other's outfits and I am soooooo excited to see the dress she picked!" He exclaimed to everyone.

"Dude, we know, it's all you've talked about in the group text since Saturday." Chan chucked at the freckled boy who was positively beaming.

"I'm happy for you guys, it sounds like it will be a really fun time!" Jisung chimed in, smiling back at Felix.

"Anyway, changing the subject. Y/N how's work going?" Seungmin looked over at you with a big smile. You smiled back at him.

"It's going pretty great, I think I'm really getting the hang of things." Everyone seemed to appreciate the change in topics as they all went around the table talking about work and the different things they were now in charge of.

Dinner went by quickly and before you knew it you were heading back home. You and Felix had only had a few glasses of wine with dinner but the buzz was definitely present on the ride home has you both giggled about everything and nothing at all.

When you got through the door Felix pulled you in for a big hug and started playing with your hair. "I really can't wait to see your dress, I'm sure it is going to look amazing." You pulled back a bit so you could see his face and he was still smiling, a light blush was present on his face but you were sure it was just the alcohol in his system.

"I'm so excited to see your outfit too 'Lix! But it is late, we should head to bed."

"Yours or mine?"

It was a harmless question given that you guys stay in each others beds all the time, but usually you go to sleep separately and then Felix will come get in bed with you when he can't sleep. Other than your nap session on Saturday you had never really laid down together ready for bed. Something about the shift in dynamic made your heart wrench a bit, you tried to hide it by smiling back at Felix.

"How about yours tonight?"

When you laid down your mind was racing a million miles per second. You never really slept in Felix's bed, he mostly came to yours. You didn't think about it when you answered him but now you realize that you fucked up. You are surrounded by the smell of Felix, its on his bedsheets, pillows, and, most importantly, on the boy curled up behind you latched on like a baby monkey. Felix's arms are around your whole body, one arm across your chest with his hand on your shoulder, and one across your stomach with his hand on your hip. His leg is even draped over your body so you are surrounded by him.

Looks like you aren't getting much sleep tonight.

~✨~

Sure enough you barley slept the night before and you wake up feeling awful. Normally when you sleep with Felix he wakes up before you and is either in the shower or cooking breakfast, but not this time. This time you woke up to find yourself still surrounded by the boy, but something feels different. You wiggled a little and your face turned bright red when you realized that Felix was not only still fast asleep but sporting a rather large erection that was pressed firmly to your backside.

You needed to remind yourself that with was a natural thing that men's bodies do in the morning and it had nothing to do with the fact that you were pressed against him in the night.

Fuck was it hot in the room or was it just you?

You tried to calm yourself down, but how could you with this beautiful man pressed against you like this? You decided maybe you should get up and act like nothing happened. Before you could get up you heard Felix grumble a bit and pull you in closer to himself.

Well there goes that plan.

You resigned yourself to waiting for Felix to wake up.

~✨~

After what felt like forever Felix finally started to wake up. You decided to save him from embarrassment at his current state you would act like you were asleep until he had released you from his hold. You closed your eyes and waited... and waited... and waited some more. Finally you felt Felix shift a bit and your heart almost stopped when he bent his head down and placed a soft kiss on your cheek before getting out of bed and heading to the shower.

You held your breath until he was out of the room and as soon as you heard the bathroom door shut your hand flew up to the place where he had kissed your cheek and you felt yourself smile at the sweet gesture. You giggled a bit until finally letting yourself get out of Felix's bed and walk into your own room to get ready for the day.

~✨~

It was finally Friday. The day you and Felix had been waiting for. You could barley contain your excitement at work and basically counted the seconds on the clock until it was (finally) time for you to go home. You drove as fast as safely possible and when you flung the door open to your apartment you found Felix waiting for you in the living room with a huge grin on his face.

"It's Friday." Felix simply stated, but you could tell he was as excited for tonight as you were.

"I am SO excited 'Lix! Let's blast some jams and start getting ready!" You beamed back at him and all but ran to your bedroom to get your speaker, Felix close behind you.

The two of you wanted to wait until you were completely ready to show off your outfits so you got ready in your room and he got ready in his with the speaker in the conjoined bathroom between the two of you. It took you both about an hour to get ready and you were shouting back and forth about various different things the whole time.

Finally you were ready. You looked stunning with your half-up hair and all the accessories you bought for the occasion. The dress fit you even better than you remembered. Hands down this was the hottest you'd ever looked in front of you roommate.

"Okay, I'm ready Lix, you ready?" You shouted full of excitement.

"Yeah! On the count of three!"

"One,"

"Two,"

"Three!"

You both opened the doors to your side of the bathroom and stopped, eyes wide on the beauty before you. It took a while for either of you to speak, just taking in the whole fit on the beautiful person in front of you. Finally Felix spoke.

"Wow... you look.... WOW!" He was beaming, completely awe stricken at your ensemble.

"Right back at you handsome." You took in the beautiful silver and black suit he now wore. The suit looked like it was made for Felix, the perfect blend of feminine with its silver floral patterning on the cuffs of the blazer and the ends of the slacks, and handsome with its sharp angles.

Felix held out his hand to you. "My lady, shall we?" You smiled at the gesture and took his hand. He put your entwined hands over your head and twirled you around, leaving you both in a fit of giggles. And with that you left to go to the party.

~✨~

Felix's work Does. Not. Fuck. Around. when it comes to parties. They had rented out a beautiful ballroom and had snacks, an open bar, as well as a rather large dance floor. You and Felix decided to start at the bar. As you were grabbing your drinks a strikingly beautiful woman came up and coldly stared you up and down before placing a hand on Felix's forearm.

"Hey 'Lixxie I'm so glad you made it!" You couldn't tell what Felix was thinking about this woman as he let out a small smile when she addressed him. "This must be the girlfriend you've been telling me about!" She gave you a cold smile devoid of genuine emotion as she spoke.

You felt your heart drop. Felix has a girlfriend? He never mentioned anyone to you. How could he even have time for a girlfriend when he was sleeping in your bed almost every night? What the fuck is going on??

Felix looked shaken at the statement for a brief second and before you could clarify that you were just his roommate he spoke.

"Yes, this is my girlfriend, Y/N."

You stared back at him with wide questioning eyes. What in the actual fuck is going on right now???

The woman looked you up and down again, chuckled to herself, then left muttering something under her breath that sounded like it rhymed with lanky witch.

As soon as she was out of earshot you grabbed Felix's arm and looked him in the eyes. "What the fuck was that?"

Felix shyly looked down and took a deep breath before explaining. "That was Megan, she works in the accounting department and she has been trying to get me to go out with her for months and when she wouldn't stop I panicked and said I had a girlfriend. She seemed to believe me at first but I never brought this girlfriend around and so she started to get suspicious. I'm sorry I brought you into this but it seemed like the perfect cover in the moment, but if it makes you uncomfortable I can call her back over and come clean." He looked back up at you and gave you a half-hearted smile.

Felix wanted to be your fake boyfriend for the night. In what world would you ever pass up that golden opportunity?

"No, It's okay 'Lix, we can fake date for the night to get her off your back. She seems like a royal bitch to me anyway and I wouldn't want to make you talk to her more than you already have to." He let out a sigh of relief and smiled at you, then stood up and wrapped his arms around you in a big hug.

"Thank you Y/N, you're a lifesaver." He pulled back a little and smiled at you as he reached up and pushed a hair out of your face. You looked into his eyes and smiled back.

"What are friends for?"

~✨~

The rest of the party flew by. Felix introduced you to all his coworkers as his girlfriend and they all congratulated you two and told you how cute it was that you two decided to wear matching outfits. You ate, drank, and had great conversations but after a while Felix seemed a bit on edge and you decided to see if he was okay before continuing to enjoy the party. You led him out to the balcony where you could only see one or two people sitting around, seemingly bored with the festivities inside.

"Hey, 'Lix, you seem... anxious? Are you doing alright?" You take his hands in yours and notice his shoulders immediately relax a bit.

"It's nothing love, just getting a bit tired is all." He had been calling you cute nicknames all night in front of his coworkers to keep up the guise of being together, but the fact that he called you love while it was just the two of you made your heart stutter momentarily. You chalked it up to the few drinks he had had throughout the night and decided to blow past it.

"Okay, well how about we dance to one song and then head out? The dance floor is too big and the DJ is too good to pass up one dance." You squeeze his hands softly to comfort him a bit and hopefully put his mind at ease. He looks up and softly smiles at you.

"Lead the way."

When you walk inside you guide Felix to the dance floor and start moving around, letting the beat take over your body. You see Felix smile at you as he begins to do the same. Pretty soon the two of you are jumping around laughing hysterically at how ridiculous you must look just jumping and moving your shoulders to the beat. When the song ends you get ready to head out before Felix takes hold of your hand. The beat changed and a slower melody filled the room.

"One more dance?" He sheepishly smiled at you. You walked toward him, placing your free hand on his waist and smiled back at him. "Anything for you 'Lix."

The two of you started with your hands together, free hands on each others waist. But as the song continued Felix slipped his hand from yours and put both of his hands on either side of your waist. Your arms came up and wrapped around his neck, your bodies now pressed into one another, looking into each others eyes. Felix rested his head on your shoulder and let out a sigh.

"I wish we could stay like this forever." He whispered into your ear.

"Me too." You whispered back.

Once the song was over Felix pulled his head back, hands still placed on your waist and smiled.

"Let's go home."

~✨~

The Uber back was quiet, your heart was beating out of your chest as you thought through the nights events. Felix had a hand on your knee and his head rested on your shoulder as you made your way back home. Once the Uber pulled up you said thank you to the driver and walked up to your apartment hand-in-hand with Felix.

After you stepped through the door Felix turned you to face him and he just looked into your eyes in silence for a moment until he softly spoke, barely a whisper.

"Can I kiss you?"

You were sure you were dreaming. There was no way this beautiful, incredibly kind, amazing man wanted to kiss you right now. As if he could tell what you were thinking he took a step towards you and brought his hand up to caress your cheek.

"You are the most beautiful person I have ever laid my eyes on and I've wanted to kiss you all night, well, I've wanted to kiss you a lot longer than that. So, may I kiss you, Y/N?"

"Yes." You whispered.

And with your consent Felix pulled your face to his and gently placed his lips on yours. It was a beautiful kiss, filled with all the emotions you had both been feeling for quite some time.

You pulled away to catch your breath and smiled at him. You thought back to Wednesday and a thought occurred to you. "It is late, we should head to bed."

"Yours or mine?"

---

Gemini: Felix

Pairing: Felix x Fem Reader, mentioned Yongbok.

Series Summary: Twins. A pair. Felix and Yongbok are your closest friends. You have known them your whole life. For the first time things get messy between you three.

Chapter Summary: After hearing a surprising confession from Yongbok, he’s gone silent again. An opportunity opens for Felix and he takes the risk.

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI due to adult content. Protected sex, oral(f receiving), fingering, slight nipple play, and use of pet name(honey).

Word Count: 10,000 and some change

Author’s Note: We learned a lot about Yongbok in part one. Now it’s time to meet and learn about the other twin, Felix. I hope you love him as much as I do. Also, Minho, my dear sweet boy, thank you for being the villain. I’ll make it up to you in a different fic.

Tag List: @lee--felix, @nymeriaaa, @hyuckilstan, @9900z, @jess-1404, @formysakeamaryllis, @skzflix-au, @downforseochangbin, @lotus-dly, @cb97percent, @joonghands, @svintsandghosts, @jeyelleohe, @sstarryoong, @skizzel-reblogs, @septicrebel, @inkybird, @drhsthl (Message me if you would like to be added. You’ll be notified when I post.)

+++

Funny how the answers to your questions pertaining to the future are resting in the shape of an envelope on your kitchen table. You sit across from it, too scared to open it. Instead, choose to stare at the printed return address of your dream school in the corner. It had been weeks of waiting for an answer after applying. It discouraged you when Felix received his acceptance letter last week. 

You both submitted applications simultaneously. From the same location. The pair of you share similar academic records. Both having a damn near perfect grade point averages minus a couple points. Yet your insecurities ran with scenarios left and right to the point you struggled to sleep. Felix reassured you the best he could, telling you to be patient. Perhaps applications get reviewed at different times, or the acceptance letter just got delayed thanks to the post office. Plausible, yes, but still you worried. You didn’t want to resort to a backup plan. 

You shot a quick text message to Felix in an attempt he could be of some help. He would open the letter for you. 

It’s not even a full minute later when Felix comes crashing through the kitchen entryway, breathless from running out of his own house to yours. “I came as fast as I could. Did you open it?”

“No. Not yet.”

“Well, why not? Just open it! Don’t wait for me!”

“I can’t. What if I don’t get in?”

“Please, you had better chances than I did and I got in!” Felix swipes the letter, tearing the envelope and tossing it behind him. With shaky hands, he unfolds the letter scanning. Seconds later, a giant smile breaks out onto his face. “It is with great pleasure I inform you of your acceptance!”

A wave of relief washes over you, the tension melting away. You can finally breathe after several weeks. Felix hands you the letter to confirm. Even with the letter in your hands, it feels like a dream. You have checked all of your goals for the last year off in completion. All the hard work has paid off. 

“Here! Order takeout on me. Let’s celebrate.” Felix says while handing his phone over. He already pulled the favorite restaurant you both enjoy up on screen. 

“I guess we’re taking Hyunjin’s offer, then?”

“Yeah, I guess. It’s cheaper than living on campus. Plus, you’ll like Seungmin.”

“He seemed nice when I met him. We’ll have to hang out with them soon. Do you wanna pick what you want?”

“Surprise me. You know what I like, anyway.”

“What are you doing?” You ask while watching Felix rummage through your cabinets for supplies. 

He pulls out a container of cocoa powder. “I’m gonna bake. I was planning on it anyway, but I’ll just make them here. Your mom keeps asking for brownies.”

“God, you know you’re her favorite child, right? No need to go overboard.

“What does that say about you?” Felix questions with a glance over his shoulder. A wide smile appears when he sees you playfully glare. 

“You play a dangerous game talking to me like that while trusting me with your credit card info.”

Felix’s laugh fills the room. It’s an empty threat. After quickly ordering, you silently observe Felix work. He’s cut his preparation time down now thanks to memorizing the recipe. It’s no longer even needed to look at measurements. The information is well retained due to the baking becoming a staple for both households. The bonus is he enjoys the hobby. There is no reason to stop him if he’s going to make goodies for free. The only downside is the wait for his attempt at lemon squares. 

“See, I’m a genius. We’ll eat our food, and then have dessert.” Felix says while closing the oven. 

He lingers by the counter. There was an attempt to clean the small mess he made, however Felix gets distracted. He’s a kid in a candy store, stopping to taste the leftover brownie batter. You can’t look away, watching Felix dip his finger in the empty bowl before bringing it to his lips. A cheerful hum leaves him while he licks the remaining batter away. Your breath gets caught in your throat watching him repeat the action. It’s normally harmless. Felix isn’t even trying to do anything remotely sexual. The longer his tongue darts over his fingers, the stronger the twinge of arousal is. It’s nearly enough to cause you to squirm in your seat.    

Two can play at that game. If you have to suffer, then so will he. 

All of Felix’s attention is on the bowl in his hands as his finger goes for another swipe of batter. He doesn’t seem suspicious of your intentions till you close the distance. Your touch is gentle when reaching for his wrist. He nervously swallows, eyes wide with curiosity. Felix is glued to his spot while you lean forward to take his finger in your mouth. A moan of approval slips out at the taste of brownie batter against your tongue. 

Felix’s eyes dart between your lips, and his saliva coated finger when you pull away. “Is it…good?” 

“Mhm. Very good.”

“You shouldn’t eat a lot because...” Felix’s words trail off. He’s hypnotized by you, watching as you reach for the mixing spoon. You drag your tongue over the length. It’s enough to have Felix leaning against the counter for support. Now nervously chewing his bottom lip, waiting to see if you continue. There isn’t a thought behind his gaze.

“Because what?”

You know exactly what you are doing to him. Still, you feign the fake innocence. Just to see what Felix’s reaction would be. Things have always been platonic between you. Doesn’t hurt to test the waters now and then. 

The sound of the doorbell startles both of you out of the moment. Felix nearly drops the mixing bowl, managing to place it on the counter. He stumbles over his words, unable to shake how flustered he is. “Th-That should be the food… I’ll go get that.”

“You sure you want to answer the door like that?” Your eyes flick down briefly before up to Felix’s face. He follows the same pattern with his own eyes. A curse leaves his mouth when noticing his cock straining against his thin shorts. His hands fly down to cover himself. The gears turning in his head, trying to come up with an excuse. You can’t help the mischievous smile creeping onto your face at his embarrassment. Part of you knows Felix is attracted to you, just unsure of what degree. 

Now you know.

You play nice and not tease him. Instead, giving him an easy out. “I’ll get the door. You take care of your problem.”

A common weekend occurrence is sleepovers. Doesn’t matter if at Felix’s place or your own. It’s routine now. What started out as movie marathons paired with falling asleep in the living room changed over the years.

Now, evenings take place in either of your bedrooms. A random movie goes on while the two of you stay snuggled together. Sometimes you don’t even speak to one another. Absorbed into your own little worlds. Felix on his computer or Switch while you read or play games on your own console. Some nights, too many heated rounds of Mario Kart or Smash Bros happen, resulting in you demanding a few rounds of zombies to unwind. Though shut down to Felix’s dramatic panic, where he is crying while running the horde away. 

Despite the events, the night ends with you falling asleep next to each other. Other times, you two fall asleep in each other’s arms after rough days. Felix says he prefers your bed since it’s larger. Less cramped with better bedding. You enjoy his bed for the giant pikachu plush you cuddle with.

Tonight is your bedroom. Another play through of Breath of the Wild consumes Felix when you roll over to face him. He glances over at you with a soft smile. “What’s on your mind?”  

“I wanted to thank you for today.”

“I did nothing.”

“Yeah, you did. You put up with my damn nerves plus the celebrating.”

“We earned it,” Felix says with a casual shrug. 

He’s right, you two earned today. It’s a moment to reflect. To take in all you have accomplished. Soon it’ll be expensive textbooks and lecture halls. New challenges and experiences not only for you but for Felix as well. It feels surreal to be moving on to the next chapter of your life. Plus, your best friend is coming with you. There isn’t an ounce of worry about what the future holds. Shouldn’t you be? 

“Are you nervous about moving?”

“No. I have you with me.” Felix didn’t even hesitate with his answer. He must feel it too. The pair of you have tackled plenty of challenges already. This is no different. “I mean it when I say that. I can take on the world with you.”

“And what happens if I just disappear? I can’t be your entire world.”

“But you are. Without you, I’d never be complete again.”

“Lix…”

“I know you don’t like it when I talk like that, but it’s true. Besides, I have other people in my life.”

The conversation ends, leaving you with your thoughts. However, the mood shifts. Felix’s lips turn down to a scowl, telling you something is troubling him. So you question him, curious to know what could cause a shift so quickly. 

“I miss him sometimes.”

Without even saying his name, Felix means Yongbok. It’s understandable that he misses his brother. It’s been a couple years now with the pair drifting apart. Being intentionally avoided by someone you are incredibly close to hurts.

“Hey, we talked about this. He’ll come around. If he wants to be in our lives, he’ll make the effort.”

“I just miss how it was. When it was the three of us. I want that back.”

“Give it some time. He loves you. You’re his other half. He just needs to learn what he’s like not to have you.”

Felix nods before rolling on his side away from you. You scoot closer, wrapping an arm around his middle to comfort him. Felix relaxes in your hold. He’s continuing to play, trying to act unaffected. The huff that leaves him reveals he’s still thinking about Yongbok. 

No matter how many times you tell Felix to not take Yongbok’s behavior personally, he does. He blames himself even though he’s done nothing wrong. It’s your goal to always be here to give him hope. If Yongbok doesn’t come around, then you will be here for Felix. Just as you do with everything that causes trouble in his life. 

“Those psychic powers of yours won’t work on the phone.”

When you glance up, Felix is in front of you, across the small island in the kitchen. He has an unamused look when peeking at the name on top of the opened messages. Caught red-handed, you lock your phone before placing it face down. You sit up straighter, giving Felix all your attention. While you were sulking in your chair, Felix finished cleaning up the mess of an after work snack. He has made it a point to clean since you had cooked. A fitting dynamic that has occurred for years. 

“Sorry. I was expecting a message. Guess it’s not gonna happen.”

“Then that person isn’t worth it. It takes two seconds to reply.”

It’s beginning to feel that way with Yongbok. Another broken promise of staying in touch. Over the last week, you have been getting updates from him every morning. Genuine, cute good morning texts that in reality were a way for you to check on his well-being. Then the messages stopped two days ago. Complete radio silence.

To entice Yongbok to reply, you sent a couple of suggestive photos in the morning asking for help with deciding on an outfit. He responds quicker when he takes the image bait. Curiosity is always getting to him. All it tells you is he can respond, though chooses not to. 

The message doesn’t say he read it. Lessens the blow slightly. Being left on read would be worse. The possibilities keep running through your mind. He could be busy, maybe lost his phone, broken it while being dumb with his friends, or he doesn’t want to talk. The last one hurts, even though you know it’s the answer. By no means is Yongbok obligated to talk to you. He’s got free will. A life of his own. Though the promise of better contact is fresh in your mind and once again, Yongbok’s promises have fallen through.

More than anything, you want to be angry. The constant lack of effort leads to disappointment. It gets to you after a while. Especially when it’s your own fault getting attached. If you kept your feelings out of this mess, his actions wouldn’t hurt you. 

That leads you back to this moment now. It’s been weeks since seeing him in person. Weeks since Yongbok thought you were asleep and confessed his love for you. Now you are convinced he didn’t mean it. Just a heat of the moment because he got caught up in the afterglow of sex. He had weeks to act on it, to change the habits he has. 

Part of you wants to reveal you heard him. To call him out, force him to be honest with where he stands in your relationship. Because you are tired of the constant let down. He says he wants you in his life, but it’s not high on his list of priorities. Especially when you know he’s spending the night drinking with his friends, thanks to Jisung ratting him out. So maybe you should just accept that the lack of contact is your answer. 

Then you have Felix. Sweet ray of sunshine in front of you, trying his hardest to make you smile. One look from you, and he’s yours. Willing to be at your beck and call, no matter the circumstances. The person you spend the most time with. 

Your relationship with him is complicated. He loves you with his whole heart. To an extent, you do as well. It’s easy to love Felix. He makes it very easy. The idea of a romantic relationship crossed your mind a few times. It seems wrong to indulge in Felix’s love. Selfish even. You, of all people, don’t deserve him. 

Speaking of temptation himself, Felix comes back into your view. He has his hands behind him, trying to hide something. “Close your eyes and open your mouth.”

“That’s a little forward, Lix.” You say with an eyebrow raised. “We’re in the kitchen, for god’s sake. People eat here.”

“Just do it.”

You comply after his dramatic eye roll. He places a piece of candy in your mouth. There is sugar coating the outside. A cautious bite reveals it’s a gummy of some sort with hints of a peach flavor the more you chew. Felix plops the bag on the counter once you open your eyes. You pull them closer to examine. The next one you eat is even sweeter. To be expected with Felix. He has a sweet tooth, after all.

“What do you think?”

“Mmm, they’re good.” You give an approving nod. “Where did you get these?”

“I brought them home from when I was on vacation. My grandparents always had these at their house. I have to make them last since there weren’t a lot of them.”

“Oh, really? Thanks.”

Before Felix can react, you swipe the bag of candy before booking it out of the kitchen. It takes a few seconds for Felix to catch on before you hear his scream from the kitchen. “No! Get back here!”

Even with your giggling, there are thundering steps up the stairs right behind you. You close his bedroom door in his face before he can reach you. The door doesn’t stop him for long, busting through with a smile cheek to cheek. “You’re trapped now. Nowhere to run!”

“You can pry them from my cold, dead hands.”

It’s sudden when Felix rushes toward you. A playful shove catches you off guard, sending you backwards onto his bed. He’s there the next instant, hovering over you. Felix is strong. Stronger than you expected his lean body to be, as you cannot buck him off of you. You try your best to keep your hands away out of his reach. Only making it easier for him to get a hold of your wrists before pinning them down above your head. He’s successful in prying the bag of candy away from you. Which is promptly tossed away from you, landing somewhere on his nightstand. 

Felix sounds so proud of his triumph. “Caught you! You can’t run from your crimes.”

“Oh, yeah?” You question, not missing a beat. “What’s my punishment, then?”

Felix’s eyes go wide as saucers at your words. The tips of his ears turn a dark shade of red before his cheeks. Realization of the position you two are in hits him.

“A kiss.” His voice was barely audible. Almost too scared to say what he wants. 

“I think I can handle that.”

Time moves slowly in the next few seconds. This doesn’t feel real. A dream perhaps? You are hyper aware of every little sound and movement. Felix's breathing has picked up. He’s tense. It’s his first kiss. Felix has never looked at anyone else other than you with romantic interest. He only has eyes for you. 

Sometimes in the past, you wondered if he would kiss you. So many nights together, eyes locked on each other, talking bullshit while the rest of the world is long forgotten. Felix would always scoot closer, focused on your lips, taking in how they moved when you talked. He never took the risk.

Here and now the ball is in his court. Felix makes his move. You don’t stop him as he leans in. Curiosity floods you. There’s no harm in one kiss. It’s just a kiss. Means nothing. 

How wrong you were when Felix brushes his lips against yours. Ever so cautious while molding his lips against yours. He may be inexperienced, yet quick to follow your lead. You can’t help the sigh slipping out of you. Felix’s lips are pillowy soft. It’s enough to cause your racing heart to give out. 

Felix pulls away to judge your reaction. His hands let your wrists go. You couldn’t move if you wanted to. Stuck frozen in place, still feeling the lingering sensation of his grip. His palms rest on the bed, keeping you trapped under him. A word isn’t said by either of you. 

Instead, Felix meets you halfway when coming in for another kiss. Your brain is working overtime to process all of your emotions. It shouldn’t feel this good to have Felix on top of you. It’s not right how satisfying his kisses are. Gentle and full of love. The lump in your throat is hard to swallow, too distracted by the way your stomach flutters. This differs from what you are used to. 

Different from Yongbok. 

Kissing Felix is exhilarating. Enough to send adrenaline rushing through you. The scariest roller coaster in the world couldn’t give you this thrill. It’s consuming. Infecting every cell in your body. Even invading all your thoughts, pushing the ones of Yongbok into a dark corner out of sight. 

It’s instinct to lean your head back. Felix trails his soft kisses down your chin to your neck. He’s experimenting with how you react. From soft kisses to light sucks. Once he gets a moan out of you, he settles to mark up the sensitive spot he found.

Felix’s fingers ghost over your skin when slipping under your shirt. Gradually creeping higher, testing the waters. Eventually halting just shy of your breasts. Your hands clamp over his to stop him. 

No, you can’t do this. Guilty conscience clears the haze in your brain. You told yourself you would never allow this situation to occur. Even if you are not sleeping with Yongbok, this is still his brother. Some lines cannot be crossed. No matter the circumstance.

“What’s wrong? Did I do-”

“Felix, we can’t.” You say cutting him off. 

He’s wide eyed and confused. His hands are still sending sparks where they touch your bare skin. It’s distracting. They’re warm, too warm against you, disabling you from making a coherent thought. Because even if you aren’t ready to admit it, all you can focus on is how you want more. You want his hands all over you. To touch every inch of you. Let him explore to figure out what makes you tick, all the things he can do to make you feel good, and make you beg for more. There is a yearning for Felix consuming you the longer he stays over you.

“Why not?” Felix sounds miles away when he questions you. It takes all your strength to focus on his words and not on the way one of his thumbs rubs small reassuring circles. Every action in the last few moments has left you dizzy. 

“It’ll be weird between us, and I don’t want that.”

“Why would it be weird? You’re not dating anyone.”

Oh, this little shit. 

You don’t want to say it out loud. You don’t want to admit the words Yongbok has said are true. No strings, no commitment, and no obligation. You have nothing with Yongbok. After all this time. After hearing that love confession, nothing changed. Yongbok seems even more distant than before. If he wanted to be with you, he would try. You had been chasing after someone who only wanted you part of the time. He only wants you when it’s convenient for him. Have his inconsistencies taught you nothing?

There is a pain in your chest. You can’t ignore how, for the first time, your love is being reciprocated. The wall you have stopping yourself from continuing down this path isn’t as strong as it used to be. Here Felix is taking the time to break the defenses brick by brick with care. 

The longer Felix runs his thumb over your skin, the more you want to toss your moral compass out. You shouldn’t. A couple of words could stop all of this now. Yet those words can’t seem to spill from your lips. You deserve happiness.

You deserve genuine love. 

The devil on your shoulder preaches to be selfish. Felix deserves love, too. He’s so patient, waiting to see if he gets a chance. You wonder why he keeps trying. He must feel led on. There are better people out in the world. Everyone knows you for making the poor decisions that is Yongbok. Why the hell would he follow in your footsteps? He must hope that you will come to your senses. 

Felix knows your mind is running a mile a minute. He sounds determined when he speaks. He rehearsed this very conversation. “I don’t care about what you did. I can replace those memories with something better.”

“Well, this is a new side of you.” You answer with a nervous laugh. Humor is your go to when diffusing tense situations. Felix’s expression doesn’t change. His way of telling you to cut the jokes. The smile tugging on the corner of your lips disappears. “Find someone better. Don’t settle on someone like me.”

“It’s always been you.”

“Felix…”

“Just let me finish. There isn’t anyone I’m gonna want. I have been in love with you for years. And maybe it’s my fault for not being more confident. But I want this. I want you and I know you want me.”

Felix is being vulnerable with the confession. It’s such a risk to admit his feelings. He is saying these things to your face. Not waiting till he thinks you are sound asleep. You believe his words. He’s always honest. Hell, he doesn’t even have a filter. He blurts out thoughts without an additional second to process them. You know he would go to the end of the earth to tell you his words. Especially this confession. If you let him, he’d dig his fingers into his own skin to pull out his own beating heart to give to you. 

That’s more than Yongbok would ever do. 

“Can we… Just go slow? See what happens?” 

A nod from you is enough for Felix to capture your lips in another hungry kiss. Your hips shift, leading to Felix to settle between your thighs. This doesn’t have to escalate. Some lazy kisses with dry humping would cause Felix to shoot a load into his jeans. Arousal pools in your gut at the thought. You want to witness Felix falling apart as he comes. To hear the whines leave him when he gets overwhelmed with pleasure. Probably sounds better than his desperate begging when he’s trying to stop your tickling fingers. 

The devil on your shoulder took the moral compass from you to toss in the ocean. Who cares for the regret that will happen later? That’s a problem for you in the future. The current you existing in the present is enjoying the experimental roll of Felix’s hips as he grinds against you. He’s hard. Potentially trying to ease the ache. The ache is mutual. You would tell him if you could formulate the words. Too busy instead moaning into another kiss. 

Felix backs off just enough to let you sit up. You pull your shirt up and off. His eyes trail down to your breasts propped up in a bra. It’s a boring older bra, yet he nervously swallows as if you are wearing a designer piece of lingerie. It’s amusing and flattering. Even more so, with his wide eyes stay glued to you, unclasping your bra to pull it away from you. 

He takes the sight of you almost in awe. Of you, your beauty, and the situation in front of him. There are hints of disbelief on his face. The gears are shifting. This is real. One of his greatest desires is happening to him. 

You lie back down before reaching for his hands. Felix lets out a gasp when his hands rest on your soft breasts. He gently kneads when your hands fall away. Experimentally tugging and rolling your nipples between his fingers till the buds harden. 

Boldly, Felix leans forward, wrapping his lips around a nipple. His tongue flicks across the bud, causing you to gasp. “And where did you learn to do this?” 

“Porn.” Felix says plainly while pulling away. “Well, the pretty porn.”

“Pretty porn?”

“Yeah, it’s softer than the normal stuff. It’s more sensual, I guess.” Felix rolls his eyes at your surprised face. “Don’t give me that look. I’m not as innocent as you think I am.”

“We just don’t talk about it.”

“Well, it’s not an everyday conversation.”

Felix leans back down to continue teasing your breasts. Your back arches when he wetly sucks a mark on your skin. You let him have his fun. Simply admiring the determination he has to touch every inch of your skin with his fingers and lips. 

He preens at the praise spilling from your lips. Now growing bolder, trailing his fingers down to tuck under the waistband of your clothes to help remove the remaining clothing.

Once again, you settle on your back, legs spread. Felix freezes in his spot, wide eyed, taking in the sight of you. He hesitates when his hands connect with your thighs to spread you wider for him. 

“Do you want to touch me?”

Felix nods, gaze transfixed on your hand while it runs over your wet slit. Curiosity gives him the confidence he needs to replace your hand with his own. “You’re wet.”

“From your teasing.” 

“I’m sorry.” He replies sheepishly. 

“Don’t be. I like it.”

You try to stifle a moan, feeling a finger slip inside of you. He cautiously moves the digit back and forth. When he’s met with less resistance, he adds another. It’s not long after he finds a comfortable pattern. He seems pleased knowing it’s him who is bringing you pleasure. A look of determination found its way on his face as other hands cautiously circles your clit. 

“Does it feel good?”

 “Very good.” You nod, propping yourself up on your elbows. “Keep doing that.”

Felix fattens himself to lie on his stomach. His warm breath against you while his fingers continue to curl inside of you. That growing ache is worse now. Walls clenching around his fingers. It’s brain melting when the second his tongue brushes against you. 

“Lix, it’s okay. Your hands are enough.”

“I want to. If you’ll let me.”

“You’re out of your mind if you think I’m gonna stop you.”

Felix is a fever dream the more you think about it. You don’t want him to get overwhelmed. Or to push himself to try things because he feels obligated. He’s known for taking on more than he’s ready for. It makes sense the curiosity to try everything got to him. If he is comfortable, then you will give him the reins to allow him to enjoy himself. You struggle to tell Felix no. If he wants something, you’ll do your damndest to get it for him. 

Your head falls back, body responding to the sensations. Felix continues to prod and lap at your clit. The licks are messy, not in time with his fingers. Still pleasurable enough to have you squirming. He just needs practice and guidance. He’s on the right track. 

“Oh, you’re so good to me.” 

There was a hum of approval from Felix as he seemed focused on the task at hand. His eyes trained on you as you tilt your head down towards him. Your hands coming to your breasts to tease yourself, hoping to add to the building orgasm. Felix could get you there. 

“You’re gonna make me come if you keep doing that.”

Sure enough, a few minutes later, the knot in your core unraveled and your orgasm hits you. Your thighs tremble while you bucked onto his fingers, trying to ride out your high. His name falling from your lips as you moan. That tongue of his finding the perfect pattern to tease you through your orgasm.

Felix slows his actions down as the high dies out. Pulling away to watch himself drag his fingers up to your clit. He comments on the subtle flinching that occurs as he teases the bundle of nerves. “You’re so sensitive after you come.”

“Yeah. Just a little.” 

The hesitation you had is gone now. Call it the heat of the moment or being touched starved. You want Felix. All of him.

You sit up, hands extended to grasp his shirt to help strip him. “We gotta get you out of these clothes.”

He discards the shirt behind him. Felix’s fingers fumble with the button on his jeans. He’s shy again. Avoiding your gaze while shoving his jeans down his legs, left behind on the floor. 

“Are you sure you want to keep going?”

“Yeah.” Felix lets out a nervous chuckle. “I’m just... I’ve never been naked in front of you.”

“Oh honey. You’re handsome. Perfect inside and out.”

“I should say things like that to you.”

“Hey, relax. You’re overthinking.” You cup Felix’s face, forcing him to look at you. “Stop worrying about all the little details. All that matters is feeling good and wanting to do this.”

He nods before leaning in for another kiss. Slowly your hand trails down his chest to his boxers. Lightly palming his erection earns you a small whine trapped in the back of Felix’s throat. Once you feel him rut up against your hand, you slip your fingers under the waistband to pull his cock free. Felix’s eyes flutter shut when your hand wraps around his cock. He’s hard, the tip sticky with pre-cum. Breath hitching as you stroke him. 

“Feels different when it’s you. I like this better.”

“Usually feels better when it’s someone else.” 

You can’t help the smile on your face. Felix is putty in your hands. To mold however you wish. He’s a blank canvas. You can create anything you want. So eager to learn. Ready to soak up knowledge like a sponge. It’s hard to resist. 

Your lips brush over an ear. “I want to feel you in me.”

Felix shudders in response. It’s cute how easy it is to get a reaction out of him. He pulls away to shed off his boxers before digging in a drawer in his nightstand. To your surprise, he has a tiny foil package he tears open. How thoughtful he is to think of a condom even without discussing it. You almost question him about how long he’s had them tucked away in anticipation of this moment. Did he steal them from Yongbok? It’s impossible to imagine Felix standing in front of a row of condoms in a store trying to decide what to buy. A warmth spreads through your chest. You are proud he went out of his way to be prepared. 

“I might not last long.” Felix says while settling between your legs. 

“It’s okay. Just do what feels right.”

“Everything feels right when it’s with you.”

A low groan reverberates through his chest when sinking his cock into you. Felix is a sight to see. Skin flushed, pouty lips, and eyes half shut as he tries to collect himself. He’s savoring the moment. How your walls feel tight around his cock. You don’t say a word, letting him enjoy all the new sensations. It’s slow going when his hips move.

“Fuck. This is a dream.”

“Not a dream.” You wrapped your arms around his neck to pull him closer to you. Your voice is sweet. “It’s very much real. Nice and steady. Take your time with me.”

Felix falls into a rhythm, shallow steady thrusts becoming more confident. Your hips shift to meet him halfway. You want to milk his cock dry. Reduce him to a babbling mess you envisioned. Only if he didn’t turn the tables on you. His cock seemed to fit perfectly in you as he continued to move. 

“Your cock feels so good.”

“Oh fuck,” Felix's grip on the bed sheets tightens. “You can’t talk like that.”

“Why not?”

“Makes me dizzy.”

“In a bad way?” You question with concern. 

“No…I just can’t hold back.”

“Don’t. Come for me.”

Your words appear to be enough encouragement. The self restraint Felix has slipped away, allowing himself to give into the pleasure. His pace picks up. Thrusts becoming erratic. He buried his face in the crook of your neck. Warm breath tickles your skin with every pant. 

“There we go.” You say between moans, “Enjoy it.”

“Ah…fuck.” Felix stills, cock nestled deep inside of you while his seed fills the condom. His whole frame trembles over you. It takes a minute to calm down enough from his high to speak again. “I’ve never come this hard before.”

“You did good. A natural.”

His eyes are glued to your pussy, watching as he pulls out. He’s quick to remove and toss the condom in the trashcan near his nightstand. You welcome him back into your embrace to cuddle. You two lay there while he enjoys the afterglow. 

“Did you enjoy yourself?”

“Oh, yes.” His lips turn down into a pout. “I wish I could have made you come again.”

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m not always gonna come from your cock. Doesn’t mean you did anything wrong. It still felt great.”

Felix simply nods. He zones out as your fingers ghost over his back, tracing over the sweaty skin. Now and then, his lips ghost over your skin to kiss you. It’s sweet, fitting for him. You hope your words are reassuring. The last thing you want is for him to think he did something wrong. It was his moment to indulge. If he is happy, then you’re happy. You might have one more trick up your sleeve to ensure he’s having fun. 

“How about I offer something else?”

Showering with a partner isn’t always a great experience. Romantic in theory, rough in practice. Water distribution can be unfair if the bathroom is cold. Lack of room to move around if the space is small, or flat out dangerous with slippery surfaces.

Thankfully, the bathroom separating the two bedrooms is nice. Nicer than the one in your own house. Felix doesn’t even have to share it with anyone since they kicked Yongbok out. 

Felix gave you a head start. The water is quick to warm up. Pressure feels good on the skin, soothing the aches lingering today. The moment of peace forces you up in your head. The more you think about the events that occurred, the more you realize you have no guilt.

No, you are content. 

The bathroom door opens. Seconds later, Felix snakes his arms around your body to pull you against him. Hands of his come up to play with your breasts. It’s adorable how he can’t get enough of you. His chin rests on your shoulder while watching the hot water cascade over you. 

“What are you doing?” You question with a mischievous smile. His touch reignites your arousal tenfold. 

“I’m helping.”

“I don’t know if this is helping.” A breathy sigh slips past your lips as you melt against him. “We’re supposed to be showering.”

“Then tell me how to help.”

There is no hesitation when reaching for one of his hands, guiding down between your legs. Your legs part enough to give him room. “Touch me.” 

“Like this?” Felix questions, voice low in your ear. The pads of his fingers circle over your clit. “Can you come from this?”

You nod. It’s hard to stay focused when his other hand teases a nipple. He alternates to keep both of them peaked the best he can. The touch is more than enough. Felix just needs to keep it consistent. 

“Just like that, Lix. Nice and light.”

Yes, perfect. Your eyes flutter shut as stars dance across your vision. Now is when you realize how touch starved your body is. It’s embarrassing how quickly another orgasm snuck up on you. Perhaps it’s Felix himself. Everything is shiny and new with a different partner. 

Even now his hands pull away to ghost over your shuddering skin. You don’t want it to stop. Let this moment last forever. Felix feels the same judging how he’s hard again, cock pressed against your ass while rutting against you.

Felix is surprised when you turn around. The quick shove against the tile causes his back to arch away from the cold tile. He sounds amused when speaking. “I like this side of you.”

“Yeah, you like it when I’m a horny mess for you?”

The bold words shut him up. Instead of responding, his eyes follow your hands trail down his chest to his fully erect cock. Both your hands work up and down the length. Felix throws his head back against the shower wall. His gasps fill the small room while his hands claw at the tile. The confident composure is long gone as he pleads for you to continue. 

“Come on honey, give it to me.”

“Fuck, don’t stop.”

“Do you wanna come?”

“Yes.” Felix aggressively nods. “Whatever you want. I’ll do it. Just...”

Another kiss against his lips keeps him distracted from whatever words he wanted to say. Felix lets himself get caught in your web, forced to endure your touch. He mumbles a string of curse words against your lips. He’s close again with how his body tenses. 

“Please…”

A sinful moan vibrates through his vocal chords as his cock pulses under your touch. You glance down in time to watch cum erupt, spilling down onto your slowing hands. It shouldn’t be this attractive watching him come. The image will forever remain burned in your memories. 

Curiosity floods you, wondering how many rounds Felix can go. However, time is not on your side tonight. Instead, you let the hot water wash away evidence before turning back to the man behind you. 

Felix is still breathless after his high dies out. His glossed over eyes stare at you while trying to regulate his breathing. A playful smile finds its way on your face as he speaks. “You’ll be the death of me.”

“Good.” You give him one last peck on the lips. “Now get cleaned up.”

You are dressed by the time Felix returns. He stops dead in his tracks when entering the room. His eyes trail over your body. You give yourself once over wondering what he appears to be hung up on. You look fine. The clothes fit. It’s a shirt and a pair of sweatpants. So you question him. “I didn’t want to put work clothes back on. Do you mind I borrowed these?”

“No. You just…look good in my clothes.”

“You’re cute. Focus, though. We have to meet with my parents in half an hour for dinner.”

As you go to pack your clothes in your bag, your hand touches something foreign at the very top. On further examination, it’s an envelope with your name scribbled on it. The handwriting is familiar, causing your stomach to lurch. Tucked inside are several hundreds in cash with a note. Yongbok was paying you back for when you helped him with bills. 

Dread washes over you. The envelope wasn’t inside earlier when you came over. There is no way he could sneak into the lockers in the backroom at work. Yongbok was here at some point. Here while you two were the only people in the house. He had to have heard you two. Even with the shower running, it could only muffle the moans to some extent. You let yourself be loud, knowing no one would be around. 

You scramble to find your phone. Quick to check your notifications. There are three unread messages.:

Yongbokkie 💙: Sorry! Was dead tired and left my phone at the shop by accident. I think the red was a great choice. 😏

Yongbokkie 💙: Why did you tease me like that? Now that’s all I’m gonna think about.  

Yongbokkie 💙: Are you home? 👀

You mumble under your breath. “Shit.”

Felix’s voice comes back from behind you. “Is everything okay?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“You don’t sound fine.”

“It’s nothing.”

You lock your phone, pondering scenarios. Did Felix know Yongbok was here? He was delayed in joining you in the shower. Surely, Felix would have said something, right? The brothers bicker every time when paths collide. 

A quick glance back at Felix reveals he’s pulling on a shirt with little thought. You know him. If he was hiding information, he would be squirming in his skin. He can’t even handle a little white lie to his friends. He sweated bullets when lying to Hyunjin about a surprise party last week. 

Then Yongbok was here without either of you knowing. 

If Yongbok says nothing, then you won’t bring it up. Frankly, you won’t attract attention to it. It’s the last of the money he owes you. There is no reason to contact him. If he asks, you will be honest and tell him you received the cash. Nothing more than that. 

The petty side of you tells you not to worry. So what if he heard you two? It’s a jab towards him. Felix said it himself, you are single. You can mess around with whoever you want. Too late to take it back now. All you can do is control your next actions. 

Felix’s happiness is hard to contain when it overflows. He vibrates where he stands when he cannot fidget. You have to admit it’s infectious, spreading a warmth inside of you when he gets like this. Nothing can bring him down.

He bounced around all day during work with his cheery demeanor. It’s no surprise when Felix tells you he wants to go out tonight after the store closes. He needs some kind of activity to burn off the excess energy. 

“We can go to Purgatory.”

The suggestion surprised you. “Felix, honey, it’s not your scene.”

“Why? Because it’s a bar?” Felix asks, already defensive. “I drink sometimes. Stop babying me.”

“I’m not babying you. We can go to a bar. Just not that one. Not where he is.”

“He shouldn’t stop me from doing things!”

“You know he’s at the shop or there with his friends. Don’t give them an opportunity to go after you.”

“You were the one that told me to not let them get to me!”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t mean for you to stick your arm in a lion’s mouth.” 

This is out of character for him. More often than not, Felix avoids Yongbok. Especially with their past. Out of nowhere, he’s willing to go where all his friends are? If there was ever a moment you needed to recognize a red flag, it’s now.

“What are you doing?” You question with narrow eyes. “Is this your Sandy from Grease moment? Changing yourself for someone isn’t healthy, Felix.”

“I’m not! The drinks always look cool, and I want to try it. Please?” 

This is a bad idea. You repeat those words to yourself the entire time you drive Felix to the familiar bar. A horrible idea. Nothing good can come from this. Guess you are risking the chance of getting banned from the establishment tonight. Another round of questioning goes on in the car. Felix stands by his choice. He wants to go in with or without you. 

Felix stares in awe when entering the bar. He takes a moment to scan over the interior. Famous horror movie posters line the wall in lighted frames. You reach back to grab his hand to keep him close, weaving through the first set of tables and booths patterned with blood stains. The goal is to avoid the stairs up to the second half of the bar where the pool tables are. Yongbok and his group play every night. 

The night is young, meaning the bar is light on patrons. Yongbok is never here this early. You can down a drink before sneaking Felix out. Perhaps fate is on your side. There is an available table in the bar’s eyesight. You can monitor Felix while you order.

“Sit here and don’t move.” You say before bee-lining for the bar. 

Jisung has a warm smile on his face when you approach him. “What are you doing here? Yongbok isn’t even here yet.”

“I need two nightmares when you get the chance. Also, can you keep an eye on your boyfriend? I don’t want him to start trouble with me tonight.”

“He’s on a leash. Why are you asking?”

“I brought someone.”

Jisung’s brows knit together when taking the wad of cash from you. It’s when you motion behind you, he takes a side step to look past you. His eyes go wide when landing on Felix. “Yongbok is gonna be the problem, not Minho.”

“I’ll keep Yongbok under control. You just keep your man behaving, please.”

Jisung tries to reassure you when ringing up your order on the register. Minho is here mingling. Last he checked, Minho was in the middle of a dart competition with Jeongin. He should be busy for another twenty minutes. 

By the time you turn around, you spot the problem child. Jisung, in fact, doesn’t have Minho on a leash. News travels faster than the speed of light in the bar. Minho is already circling Felix like a hawk.  

When you approach, there is no hiding the bitterness in your voice. “What do you want, Minho?”

“Hey now, we’re just talking. Having a friendly conversation. Right?” Minho smiles, placing a hand on Felix’s shoulder. Felix is leaning away from the other. He doesn’t say a word. Lips in a thin, tight line. He’s shutting down the longer the other talks. “You don’t belong here, pretty boy. You got a curfew anyway. Don’t you?” 

Felix is trying to be the bigger person. The gears are shifting as he decides how he wants to handle the situation. His eyes dart over to yours before glancing down at the drinks you brought. You pray he’s receiving your mental message to not instigate. 

Minho keeps talking, “It’s okay. You can go. I’ll keep her company till Yongbok gets here. You can run along.”

“I can be here if I want to be.”

“Sure, tough guy. But let me tell you something. Mommy isn’t here to protect you if you stay. And I don’t mean her.”

“Minho, fuck off.”

Minho continues to ignore whatever words you spat at him. You aren’t part of this conversation. He’s too determined to keep pushing and prodding at Felix. Felix is struggling to bite his tongue. Now beginning to toy with the glass in front of him. He’s handling Minho far better than you are. It’s only a matter of time till Felix snaps back. Perhaps the move here is to just leave. Let Minho have this win and before he escalates the situation. 

Minho’s voice lowers when he leans closer to Felix. “I could bet money she thinks of him when she fucks you. Perks of you looking the same.” 

The smile on Minho’s face only grows when he sees Felix deadpan. Before you can react, the contents of Felix’s drink connects with Minho’s face, sending the other back sputtering in surprise. You raise from your seat, cursing Felix. This is the last thing that needs to happen. 

“Oh, you little shit.” Minho recovers immediately. “Your balls finally drop?”

This is the reaction Minho wanted. He was looking for an excuse to fight Felix and he walked right into it. Felix stands, keeping his ground as Minho invades his personal space. “Well, come on. Show me what you got, lover boy.”

“You’re not worth it.”

“Oh no, you don’t get to play the all mighty card.”

Minho jabs Felix square in the chest. The shove catches him off guard, causing him to stumble backwards. Felix cannot keep his balance, tripping over his chair. It’s hard to watch when he falls, the back of his head hitting a corner of a nearby table. Minho is quick, reaching for Felix to haul him back on his feet. 

“Minho! Stop!” You shout, closing the distance. 

Unfortunately, even with all your strength, you can’t seem to pull Minho away. To your surprise, Yongbok appears, prying you away from Minho. He forces you behind him before grabbing fistfuls of Minho’s shirt to pull him off Felix with ease. Minho whips around, face murderous when he sees Yongbok of all people stopping him. He’s in Yongbok’s personal space questioning the other.

“I don’t care what he did. You don’t fucking touch my brother.” Yongbok spats, refusing to back down. 

For the first time, Yongbok has defended Felix against his friends. As much as you would love to witness the moment, you need to get Felix out of here. Staff of the bar have caught on. It won’t be long till security shows up. You help Felix up off the ground while their bickering distracts the pair. His well-being is your only concern. Yongbok can handle himself. 

A shaky hand of Felix’s rises to check on the back of his head. Thankfully, there is no blood. Most likely a nasty bump and a gnarly headache in his future. You can look once it’s safe. The fight-or-flight response kicks in. You need to get out of here. With Felix right in your grip, you lead him out of the bar. He doesn’t say a word, keeping his head down while glued to your hip. 

The adrenaline keeps you on edge the entire drive home. Your palms sweat against the steering wheel as your thoughts race. Yongbok can do damage control. Minho won’t come after Felix. He’s too busy laughing at the entire ordeal among the group of friends. 

When you pull into your driveway, another vehicle stops at the curb. It’s Yongbok. He’s alone. Still upset, judging by the way he calls your name. You don’t answer, too focused on getting Felix inside. 

Felix plops down in a chair in the kitchen, continuing to sulk. His voice is soft. “You were right.” 

“Shut up, Felix.” You say while digging for an ice pack in the freezer. You reach for a nearby towel to wrap it up. He groans, feeling the coldness against his head. “Use this to help the swelling.”

“He’s not a helpless child. Don’t coddle him.”

You glance over to see Yongbok with a nasty glare on his face. He motions towards the living room before dipping out of the room. You heave a sigh, trying to prepare for the conversation about to happen. Felix appears to be in decent shape. No dizziness or lightheadedness when you question him. He should be fine to leave alone for a few moments. 

When you enter the living room, Yongbok is leaning against the wall near the front door. He’s still fuming. The heat of his anger almost radiated off of him like the sun. You fidget with your hands as you close the distance. 

“Thank you for helping him.”

“Why the fuck would you let him come with you?”

“I didn’t want to. I told him it was a bad idea but…”

“But what?” Yongbok cuts you off. Not even giving you the chance to explain yourself. The condescending remark sparks your temper the more he talks. “Not your smartest move, babe.”

“Well, maybe if you didn’t enable Minho.”

“I don’t fucking enable him.”

“Then what was that? Huh?” You bark back with your own venom. Unable to hold back your anger. “Him defending your so-called honor? He’s a piece of shit, Yongbok.”

“You keep him out of that bar and I’ll worry about my friends.” 

Yongbok pushes off the wall to leave. Before he gets the chance, you block his way to keep him in front of you. There is a single question doing laps in your brain that you need the answer to. Especially after Yongbok helped Felix. 

“Why won’t you fix your relationship with him? Hm? You clearly care.”

“He has you. That’s all he needs.”

“He needs his brother. This is a chance to fix things with him. You’re gonna lose him forever if you’re not careful. I know you don’t want that.”

“It’s not that simple.” 

“Why not?”

“Do you know how hard it is? Being in his shadow? No matter what I do, it’s not good enough. It’ll never be enough.” He huffs out a laugh almost in disbelief at his own words. As if what he’s explaining is common knowledge that only a fool wouldn’t understand.

“He’s the perfect son. Hell, the perfect boyfriend, too. Everyone wants you to be with him. Everyone expects the two of you to ride off in the sunset. Have that damn fairytale wedding he’s been dreaming about since he was fucking ten.” Yongbok shakes his head, voice lower, sounding defeated. “He doesn’t even have to try. It’ll just happen. Sorry if it gets under my skin.”

“Yongbok, what the hell are you talking about?”

“He gets you. He doesn’t need me.”

“Bokkie…” Your voice trails off when you go to reach for him. 

Yongbok knocks your hand away before it can touch him. “Stop. Just go be with him like you always are.”

The front door slams shut with enough force to be heard through the house. Part of you wants to chase after Yongbok. Though it’s a losing battle when he’s upset. He shuts down till he cools off or gets a couple beers in him. You can wait a few hours to send a message his way to see how he’s doing. Currently, you have the other brother to worry about. 

Felix is where you left him when you come back into the kitchen. His eyes shoot to the floor while holding the ice pack to his head. Reminds you of a kicked puppy afraid to get a scolding. 

“How’s the pain?” You question. 

He shrugs in response. “Not as bad as it was. I’ll be okay.”

“Let me grab something to take the edge off.”

Felix’s hand flies up to grab your wrist. His voice a whisper. “I’m sorry.”

“Was it everything you expected it to be?”

“I just want to be what you want,” Felix sounds dejected. 

Yup, there it is. The core reason for all of today’s trouble. Felix denied the behavior earlier, but you know he was trying to prove himself. If not to you, to Yongbok. Over the years, these two never change. Some dumb pissing contest to influence your opinion on them. 

“I like you the way you are. Why would I want you to change?”

“That’s not true.” Felix’s eyes are watery. He’s fighting to not cry, voice cracking. “Something is clearly wrong with me. If I was good enough, you wouldn’t go running to him.”

“Lixie…”

“He just drags you along like a toy when you can be with someone that loves you. I’m here. Right here.” Felix sounds so broken, so hurt. You hate seeing him upset. It’s a knife to the chest the more he speaks. “Why? Why not me? It hurts. I want you and I can’t have you. What am I doing wrong?”

You slide into the seat next to him. “Nothing. Honey, you’ve done nothing wrong. You deserve someone better. I don’t deserve your love.”

“Don’t say that! That makes it worse.” Felix says, sinking further into himself. “I got a taste of happiness with you. How am I supposed to move on?”

“Lix…”

“Normal friends don’t sleep next to each other.” Felix’s tone shifts. The familiar smile you are used to seeing is long gone. A distant memory now replaced with a quivering lip. He rushes his words out before he crumbles. “They don’t cuddle, they don’t flirt like we do, and they sure as hell don’t lick brownie batter off fingers!”

He’s right. You can’t help nodding. You opened the door to something more. Then you immediately shut it down after feeling guilty. You crushed Felix’s hopes by not considering the consequences. 

“Lix, I’m sorry. I never meant to give you false hope. I shouldn’t have been selfish with you.”

“Do you regret it? Regret sleeping with me? Be honest.”

“No. I thought I would. But I don’t. Not at all.”

“Why won’t you take this risk with me?” Felix moves closer, pleading with you. “I need one chance. One chance to show you how much I love you.”

“Felix, I need time, okay? Please. I’m sorry for all of this. I’m not ready for a relationship. Let’s get through these couple of months and get settled in our new place. Then we can do this the right way. Can you do that for me?”

“Yeah. I can do that.” He replies, using the back of his hand to wipe away at the tears that have formed. “I’ve waited this long.”

“Trust me. It’ll be worth it. It’ll be a fresh start. We can go do all the cute couple things like normal people.”

You excuse yourself under the guise of getting him some painkillers. You need a minute to breathe before the walls cave in and crush you. There is solace once in a locked bathroom. All your emotions overflow. It hits like a wave, crashing against you. You could have avoided this mess. The fear of losing both of the important people in your life is real. You need to collect yourself, do damage control, and pray that you still have a friend after this. 

Now is the time to decide what you want. To decide what the game plan is. Foremost, Felix is the priority. The last week with him brought joy to you. Made you feel loved. Felix can give you the healthy relationship you crave. He can give you the relationship that Yongbok won’t and cannot give. 

Go on, admit to yourself that Felix is what you want. It’s better than chasing after Yongbok. Though you want friendship with Yongbok. Or at the very least, end on good terms. When you leave for college, you will be a couple hours away. Fewer chances to see each other, meaning time will heal wounds. Sleeping with someone’s brother isn’t exactly easy to forgive. Hell, you don’t even know if he caught on to what happened yesterday. 

Regardless, the plan is simple the more you think about it. Keep your distance from Yongbok. Just for now, keep your distance and let the dust settle. Yongbok will get wrapped up in work or his friends and forget tonight even happened. He’ll go back to his sporadic contact, leaving you to focus on preparing for the move. Get over him. It’ll help whatever feelings dissipate. This will give time for yourself so you don’t go head first into a rebound with Felix. You want to give Felix a fair chance but only in a better mindset. Now you just need to stick with it.

Gemini [coming soon] [preview]

©︎Abiaswreck | Do not copy, repost, or translate | As always, reblogs and feedback are appreciated!

REBLOG | Chapter 1

«SERIES MASTERLIST»

“I don’t think Hyejin told her where exactly we want them,” Hyunjin smirked as he got up and walked towards you. He stood right behind you and spoke into your ear with a very soft voice. “These are supposed to be pelvic tattoos, beautiful.”

SIGN UP 📜8.3k 🚨Refer to series masterlist for general themes & warnings of this story: ASMR, audio roleplaying/voice acting, masturbation, recreational drug use, tattooing (mention of needles), sex under influence, masochistic tendencies, semi-public sex (in a non-residential environment), threesome (M/F/M), spitroasting, oral sex, unprotected sex, cum swallowing Audio roleplay featuring: A milf scenario, lactation kink/breastfeeding, nipple play, oral sex 💭Reblogs & comments are always appreciated and please keep in mind they are the ultimate motivation fuel. 🍮Like my content? Consider supporting my work with a pudding!

Work. That was all you knew.

You had a serious bone to pick with the cupid by now. Strings? More like a string of unsatisfactory relationships. When the sex was great, the conversation wasn’t. If the conversation was great, then the sex wasn’t. Once in a blue moon when both of them would be okayish, this time there would be no intellectual stimulation, so take your pick from the sea that’s actually a bathtub where the only available fish are fuckboy tuna, clingy salmon, or freshwater cod that only likes to swim on the shallow end; so easy to catch but so goddamn bland. The more time went by, the more you were convinced it was impossible to find an acceptable balance, so thanks, but no thanks. Why would you have to be the one to compromise your needs? Fuck that. 

In conclusion, all men can kindly fuck right off because I ain’t your mama. Anything you can do I can do better because I have my ride or die vibrators with me.

Sometimes you couldn’t help but feel like you were leading this double life, though. On the outside, you were this ‘cool chick’. Independent. Self-sufficient. The sassy badass who cursed a lot for her own good but considering her scoreboard, indeed very charming. A renowned interior designer who owned a successful business, so much so that she didn’t look for work anymore; the work would find her, which meant a ridiculously high-end network with the galas, fancy dinners, luxury bar openings, and all that jazz.

When you were by yourself, however…

Your close friend, or main bitch as you called her, Hyejin accidentally got you into it something over a Friday brunch, completely unaware of the impact this was going to have on your life.

“I swear to god, the porn industry needs to step up its game,” you scarfed down your bagel, “Not everybody is the nymphomaniac that gets off to everything, you know? I can’t even get wet while watching some of this shit.”

“Does it have to be a video?” Hyejin asked matter-of-factly while sipping on her Bellini, “I mean there are many different mediums out there.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, woke bitch?”

She shrugged, “Like, have you tried reading porn?”

You looked at her with cocked brows, “How does that even work? Do I walk into a bookstore and go like ‘Hey, what’s your bestsellers on thigh riding?’”

Hyejin almost snorted her drink out of her nose because of how hard she laughed, “This is not the 56k modem era anymore, you know that right?” she wiped her mouth, “You can just read stuff on the internet. Just go home and google ‘adult stories’ or ‘smut’. I promise you’ll find a bunch of good stuff. I personally like hanging out at Tumblr.”

No matter how ridiculous that sounded, that was literally how your Tumblr addiction started. You turned into this goddamn hyperfixationist who heavily indulged in reading smut and yelling about fictional characters online. You kept telling yourself there was nothing wrong with a woman enjoying some steamy erotica every now and then because imagination was the best porn, after all. However, you’d never tell this to anyone else because of the boss bitch reputation you had to maintain. Especially in the cutthroat industry circle you were in where money rained like it was fucking monsoon season.

Besides the going completely feral over written porn thing, you also drew as an outlet because you found a weird sense of comfort in sketching stuff that was not strictly the straight lines and sharp angles of a room. You would create some designs for Hyejin every now and then to use in her tattoo studio as well, and she eventually offered to teach you the art itself. Why not make it a lucrative side hustle since you clearly enjoyed the crap out of it? It wasn’t that easy to get you to buy into the idea, though.

“Remind me, why did I start learning this again?”

“Because it’s like boxing where you punch people with a needle,” she informed you with a dead serious face, “Great stress reliever.”

You weren’t sure whether you should have been curious or concerned.

“I say this with all the love in the world, Jin, but you need help.”

“And you need to get laid,” she instantly retorted while preparing the ink.

“But I alr-”

“Dicked down.”

“I know, I alr-”

“By an actual human being.”

Just like that, your entire defense on your polyamorous relationship with your toys went out the window.

“Then, no thanks.”

“When was the last time you saw a dick in real life, seriously?” Hyejin asked, entirely annoyed by your relentless refusal to meet anybody. Not that you had anything against people, it was just that nothing was intriguing enough for you. It didn’t seem like it would be worth wasting your time on getting to know somebody when you already knew how it was gonna end. If you happened to come across someone who was decent-looking, knew how to put two sentences together, a little on the adult side of the intellectual swimming pool, and was willing to be a freak in your sheets, by all means. Nevertheless, you knew this was an outline of a prince charming that belonged to a twisted fairy tale, so why bother? You briefly paused to take a look into the disaster drawer residing in a far corner of your mind.

“When I dated your friend who was a bit too into roleplaying. Not to mention he corrupted me for good.”

“Who?”

“Hongjoong.”

“BITCH, THAT WAS LIKE A YEAR AGO!”

You shrugged, not one bit interested in the prospect of matchmaking, and channeled all your attention to the orange in your hand, the canvas where you kept practicing your tattooing skills whenever there wasn’t some bare skin to adorn. Don’t get it twisted, you were as much frustrated, if not concerned, as Hyejin about the lack of sheer desire to fuck the daylights out of someone. You really really missed that feeling and that was why, especially on faded nights, your hand would hover over your phone to call Hongjoong to experience that one more time because you were about to forget what that was like.

He was the aforementioned prince charming from the twisted fairyland, who was also the one to call it quits because neither of you could prioritize each other over work. Cue the ‘They got nothing on you’ dramatics when you didn’t even fucking try because you couldn’t help wondering if he was feeling the same way.

You were probably the first hobbyist tattoo artist ever, picking this up just for shits and giggles with no intention of making a career out of it, but Hyejin was very much content with the situation since it meant you could be her backup artist to substitute some of her appointments whenever she was swamped. Her clientele was very… eccentric to say the least.

Fucking rich people.

While you kept shading a lizard on the orange to give it a 3D effect and make it pop, Hyejin broke into a smirk all of a sudden as she looked at her schedule and asked you ever so casually.

“Actually, do you mind taking over my Friday appointment? I totally forgot I was supposed to go lingerie shopping with Jennie. She’s gonna drag my ass throughout the town that day.”

“Depends,” you responded without taking your eyes off what looked like an actual lizard eating the orange by then, “Is it another whiny bitch that wants a tramp stamp? I can’t sit here for two hours listening to someone hissing like a snake. No matter how much I want it to be, this ain’t the Slytherin common room.”

“No, it’s two guys,” she handed you the design sheet to examine, “They came up with this themselves.”

You were pleasantly surprised when you saw what was on the sheet. The texture, the shading, the figures themselves looked like they came out of very proficient hands, but your mind immediately painted you a picture of two disgustingly buff guys that wanted tattoos on their biceps to flex them. In your experience, the gym dudes with their half-naked mirror selfies and fine artwork didn’t mix, so whatever the fuck was up with this indeed?

“What time?”

“Midnight. That’s when they get off work,” Hyejin’s grin got wider, “I think you’ll get a kick out of this particular appointment.”

“Gentlemen.”

Chris greeted the seven other guys in the conference room waiting for him to arrive, looking slightly disheveled like he was trying to mask a severe hangover. Minho was all smiles upon seeing his business partner finally gracing the room, and while his tone was disgustingly sweet, what he actually conveyed was nothing less than psychopathically intimidating.

“You’re late. Again.”

“I wasn’t aware I had to punch in for my own fucking business,” Chris sat down in the chair next to him facing the gigantic LED TV.

“It’s my business as much as yours, so…” Minho shot him a death glare behind a civil composure, “Be here at 7 AM sharp like the rest of us unless you wanna accidentally choke on dark roast one morning. Or you know, arsenic.”

Chris looked at Minho for five seconds straight with a done look and then turned his attention to the table, “If Minho’s done throwing a fit, we can begin,” he fired up his laptop and continued, “Usual Monday agenda. Theme ideas for upcoming weeks, please.”

After a brief pause of brainstorming Seungmin broke the silence, “Traditions.”

“Care to elaborate?”

“We could do something like a Joseon theme. Either warriors or princes.”

“Like a feast in the palace,” Jeongin added, “Could be thrown in the honor of our guests or ourselves depending on which direction we go with.”

“Oh, I like this,” Chris squinted his eyes, “What would be the focus of the night?”

“Well, princes don’t do the simping, do they?” Jisung commented, “Cue the concubine guests for the night.”

“That’s exactly why we should be simping,” Hyunjin countered with a smile, “Nothing that strokes the ego more than being someone’s chart-topper. And if that someone is actually a prince everybody’s battling over the attention of?”

“I can practically feel the wetness on my fingers,” Changbin flashed a controrted smile, “Fucking love this.”

“Hyunjin’s gonna break his all-time record with that one,” Jisung cackled, “You’re gonna have some serious catching up to do, Lix.”

“No gap is unclosable. Pun very much intended,” Felix kept rotating the pen between his fingers dexterously, leisurely swerving side-to-side on his chair, “Nothing I haven’t done before.”

“We’re yet to hear you contribute, Freckles,” Minho snapped at Felix’s way too comfortable posture, “Do the flexing after the fact, not before.”

“Fine,” Felix sighed, “MILF night.”

“You might be onto something deranged motherfucker,” Chris pointed his pen at Felix, “Elaborate.”

Felix sat up upon Minho’s non-stop staring without any blinks and responded, “Simple. We host the literal desperate housewives who don’t get the much-needed attention from their husbands. Can you imagine if they are actually breastfeeding? My fucking god,” he sighed with his eyes closed, leaning back into his chair again. True to his nature, Felix's pitch was so fucking unhinged that a momentary silence took over the room.

“Just how the fuck do you envision us doing that? Do you have a contact list of people who’s recently given birth?” Minho berated him, in complete disbelief of what he was hearing. Chris seconded.

“Seriously Lix, A+ on the creativity as usual but for the jillionth time, please indulge in those in your own time.”

“What? I just wanna provide an experience of a lifetime, my lord,” Felix addressed Chris directly, “It’s one of those things that you just know a lot of people are curious about.”

“And I just wanna overstimulate someone until I make them pass out at least three times, but our legal insurance doesn’t cover that, either. Moving on,” Chris scrapped the idea at lightspeed, “Did the draft designs arrive for the bachelorette thing?”

“Yes,” Minho turned on the TV connected to his computer for a collective review. The drafts were supposed to be interior design mockups for the bachelorette party theme requested by one of their regulars, and Chris’ brief to the firm they were working with was that it was supposed to spell class. Yet, all he could see on the screen was the goddamn neon lights blaring in different shades of red and giving him an instant headache.

“What the fuck is this pedestrianism? Do we look like we’re running a strip club?”

“No, but we’re indeed in the business of lust, my lord,” Hyunjin tried to provide some perspective being the only art-literate person in the room, “They weren’t too far off with their palette choice.”

“Not good enough, this is way too one-dimensional. We’re terminating our contract with them after I give them a goddamn encyclopedia of a revision request,” Chris tapped on Minho’s computer to signal him to make a note of it, “We need someone that could bring our vision into reality. I wanna experience a fucking moodboard in corporal form.”

“We’re gonna have to start a whole new scouting process for this, my lord,” Felix pointed out and proceeded to overtly throw shade over Chris’ Olympian-level fastidiousness, “You declined every single one of the design firms we brought to your attention.”

“Because they weren’t fucking good enough!”

Minho opened up a browser tab and typed in an address, “I think you’re gonna like this one.”

He pressed enter and an online portfolio flashed on the screen. It included frames outlining interior design work done for residential areas as well as spaces created for business, hospitality, dining, and entertainment. With each frame, Chris’s interest visibly increased.

“Oh, I like this. I fucking like this!”

“The references are solid,” Minho clicked on the related tab for Chris to see, “They have worked with some entertainment giants, as well.”

“Hyun?”

“Elegant style regardless of function. Very tasteful,” Hyunjin offered his insight with his index finger pressed against his temple, “I’m assuming colors get bolder based on the target clientele. Looks like they speak your language of nitpickiness, my lord.”

“Don’t get snarky with me. It’s called attention to detail,” Chris scoffed but still glowing with palpable excitement, “I say we book an exploratory meeting, Min.”

“Already did. We’re gonna have lunch with them.”

“When?”

“In two hours.”

“Once again proving to be the Shadow King, indeed,” Changbin snorted, “If that’ll be all, permission to leave. I gotta hit the gym in an hour and there’s the hell of traffic I need to beat.”

“Dismissed,” Chris concluded the meeting, leading everyone to get up from their seats. Hyunjin threw his arm around Felix and leaned into his ear like he was about to reveal a secret.

“You know, they keep telling you to do it on your own time but how come you’re still not giving this some serious thought? That’s literal money showers side hustle idea right there.”

“What do you mean?”

Hyunjin stopped dead in his tracks, incredulous how Felix was not able to think about this by himself.

“You’re fucking with me, right? Have you never heard of voice acting before?”

“Are you legit suggesting that I audition to do voiceovers right now? Because hard pass.”

Hyunjin landed a punch on Felix’s shoulder, “No, asshole, I’m talking about acting. People lose their shit over that sexy roleplaying stuff and it indeed has a very niche audience like you pointed out earlier,” then he continued adamant to get Felix to agree to his genius idea, “Set up an NSFW blog or a webpage of some sort, connect a Patreon account, and you’re golden.”

Felix scanned Hyunjin’s face with a dubious expression to see whether he was for real or not.

“Why are you losing your mind over this idea?”

“Because I feel like a talent scout looking at a diamond mine. Obviously, I’ll demand a cut from your earnings like any manager would.”

“There it is,” Felix knowingly smiled, “My best interests at your heart thing was too far-fetched to believe anyway.”

Hyunjin reciprocated the smile but kept on insisting nevertheless in the only language Felix would understand, “Any follower, subscriber, or whatever the hell it is you trap, I’ll add that to your scoreboard, as well. It totally counts.”

The aforementioned scoreboard was a biannual tally Hyunjin and Felix were keeping regarding their guest count. Whoever came up ahead was the beneficiary of whatever they bet on six months prior, and the eventual prizes kept getting more and more expensive. First, it was just a Rolex proposed by Hyunjin; then it was a massage chair Felix wanted, and it eventually escalated into a fucking sports car. With the amount of money they were earning, it was like buying groceries for them, but it was the age-old rivalry between them that kept things interesting and winning over the other all the more satisfactory. Felix tilted his head and smiled.

“Maybe it’s time we put the unhinged thoughts to some lucrative use, huh Hyun?”

“Good morning, Yuna. What’s my schedule for today?” you stormed into the office and placed a caramel macchiato on your assistant’s desk. You must have been the only boss in the world who asked their employees how they liked their coffee, not the other way around.

“Lunch meeting at noon with potential clients. They insist on working with you.”

“Who is it?”

“Club owners.”

“Breakfast or Printworks?”

“Apparently a speakeasy.”

“O…kay?” you creased your brows upon the unexpected description, “Where am I going?”

“Four Seasons.”

“WHAT SEASONS?”

You were used to the fancy stuff coming in after the job was done as a form of thank you, most certainly not right off the bat. Your usual lunch meetings would take place at decent restaurants out of courtesy, but god-level charming attempt before even meeting you?

Sus.

“Did they provide a brief?”

“A concise one. They said they’d like to discuss it in detail face-to-face. Here,” Yuna handed you the printed document. You made your way to your office after thanking her and studied the material inside and out until lunch, even during the ride to your destination. When you walked into the place, it wasn’t that hard to spot your people of interest since they were the only ones there. Like they closed the place down for themselves. The two guys who looked like suit models put their scotch glasses down and stood up to their feet as soon as they spotted you.

“Thank you very much for agreeing to meet with us on such short notice,” one of them immediately extended his hand to shake yours, “My name is Lee Minho, and this is my business partner Chris Bang. Great pleasure to make your acquaintance in person.”

“Likewise,” you shook both their hands and sat down across them. For some mindblowing reason, they took the liberty of ordering a bottle of sauvignon blanc for you. In an ice bucket just the way you liked. In the specific brand and year that you couldn’t get enough of.

“May I?” the Chris guy gestured to the bottle and proceeded to pour it for you.

What the heck kind of charm molecules are there in your drinking water my dudes?

“I have to say, I was quite surprised when I was informed you wanted to work with me. Speakeasies are notoriously private establishments that usually have their in-house designers.”

“That’s sort of why we’re seeking your assistance,” Chris commented, “Our needs are quite specific.”

“What he means to say is that he’s an insufferably detail-oriented person. An asshole, if you will,” Minho interjected, getting you to almost choke on your wine. You were so used to meeting people who walked around with sticks up their asses that the forwardness was refreshingly welcome.

“Why don’t you tell me more about your club?”

“We prefer ‘lounge’,” Minho corrected you and continued to paint you a verbal picture of what their business entailed. From the way he described it to you, it actually sounded like a mystical teahouse. You listened intently until he finished, knocking out two glasses of wine in the meantime, and blurted out with your hands clasped on the table.

“That sounds fascinating. I initially imagined some rave shit.”

Two pairs of eyes locked on you widened in shock, but Minho was the one shattering the awkwardness with a loud cackle, dragging Chris with him. You weren’t even fazed.

“Yeah, my assistant was supposed to tell you that. I curse a lot when I get comfortable. You’ll get used to it.”

“Appreciate the candor,” said Chris as his laughter was dying down, “Well, for starters it’s an exclusive place.”

“Of?”

“We sell our skills,” Minho commented, “We practice the art of conversation. Companionship.”

“And seduction,” Chris completed his sentence and downed his scotch.

You examined his face with a twisted smile and crossed your arms over your chest.

“Mr. Bang, are you insinuating you are running a modern-day okiya where you train geishas?”

Minho and Chris shared a look and burst into another fit of laughter, clearly very entertained by your thought process.

“Male ones that do a little more than simply keeping company, but yeah, that’s the gist.”

You laughed along with them while the buzz from wine comfortably spread throughout your body. All in all, these two guys were running a club, lounge, or whatever the fuck they liked to call it where they kept people company and practiced the art of… seduction? 

Your smile slowly faded away once the realization hit.

Oh my god, this is a fucking host club!

“What’s your clientele like?” you nonchalantly asked trying your utmost best to keep your composure, causing your prospective clients to share a look again.

“You’re very investigative, aren’t you?”

“It’s called needs analysis, Mr. Lee. I have to know what you want to be able to cater to you properly,” you opened your meeting journal, “My notes here say you want to, and I quote, ’experience a fucking moodboard in corporal form.’ Is that right?”

“I just can’t,” Minho’s laughter got louder and he turned to Chris while wiping the tears from his eyes, “Didn’t I tell you she’s the best?”

“Indeed. I’m very impressed,” Chris channeled his attention to you, “Suffice it to say that it’s a closed circle of people.”

“You have regulars?”

“We do, but we’re only able to host them every six months or so.”

“Why?”

“Our waiting list tends to be very long. We can’t host more than a handful of guests per night.”

You jotted down all the information you gathered and downed your wine after closing your notebook, “Seems interesting. I can’t work for another whiny real housewife of the middle of nowhere that throws a fit over redoing her kitchen, you know what I mean? Is the common area you mentioned the only place you want done?”

“Yes.”

“What did you have in mind?”

“Yeah, about that. There is actually a catch,” Chris disclosed what you had been expecting all along, “We want this place redone every week.”

“Excuse you?”

They shared a chuckle and Minho took over, “Consider it, for the lack of a better word, a weekly Halloween party. Our theme changes on a regular basis and we need someone who can work fast and deliver.”

“Time constraints are not that big of a deal, but this will significantly increase the amount I’m going to request in the proposal I’m going to prepare for you,” you stated openly. You were expecting to negotiate the deal further, but the response you ended up getting managed to surprise you even more.

“We don’t need a proposal. Just name your price and we’ll sign it. The only term we want in the contract is strictly abiding by the deadlines is all.”

You cocked your brows at them, seriously considering the possibility of this whole ordeal being a ploy.

“As this is not my first rodeo, Mr. Lee, I tend to put a lot of terms in my contracts. Are you sure you don’t wanna go over them first?”

“No, thank you. We’d like to get started as soon as possible.”

Then you’re paying the full amount up front and I’m not doing shit until your cheques clear.

“In that case, I will need reference photos to do a preliminary. Either I can send my guys in to take them, or you can send them to me. Whichever you prefer.”

“We’ll have our people prepare a folder for you with everything you need. Once again, thank you so much for agreeing to meet with us. We’ll be scheduling another meeting for the signing with your assistant.”

You shook hands and left the place after being escorted out by your new clients without having any idea you would end up exclusively working for them for the foreseeable future.

That prolonged dry spell you were in had definitely started taking a toll on your nerves as well as your sanity. Although you would never admit it to her face, you were starting to think that maybe Hyejin was indeed right and you needed to let something non-synthetic inside you, even if it was a no-strings thing. The more you kept splitting hairs and complaining about this guy’s stamina and that guy’s overuse of ‘like’ in his sentences, the more likely you were going to die completely having forgotten what it felt like to fuck someone that you managed to turn on. Until that happened, however, you had to keep seeking remedy from digital media and counterfeit vibrations. Yes, you could watch porn, but there was just something about this particular genre that you indescribably enjoyed.

Hey, to each their own. 

"Alright, hellsite. Do your thing."

You logged into Tumblr, clicked on the #smut tag, and started browsing through the content, reading a bunch of story descriptions to pick one to get you through the night. An endless scroll just to discover nothing novel really. Similar tropes, similar warnings, similar premises… Not that it was the authors’ fault - how innovative could you get with the porn itself anyway? Scroll, scroll, scroll, scroll…

Suddenly something caught your eye; there were a massive amount of notes right below a particular post. You clicked to see about eighty percent of them were composed of likes, but here was the main argument: not that this was fucking bird app or Instagram, but this was still an indication that people liked this particular content, right? However, more importantly…

The post didn’t contain a body of text. It was an embedded link to what looked like an audio file.

“What the fuck is an ‘intimate roleplayer?’ People give themselves all kinds of titles these days I swear to fucking god.”

Your nextdoor neighbor eats you out during housewarming party (M4Single Parent Milf!Listener) Warnings: Hair brushing, strong mouth sounds, nipple play, breastfeeding, oral sex. Listener discretion advised.

Listener? During housew-?

WHAT THE DAMN HELL?

The title itself intrigued the shit out of you to an extent that you instantly clicked on the link and the audio started playing. You grabbed your earphones, turned your volume to the max, and leaned back on your chair closing your eyes. Soft chatter sound filled in your ears, basically painting the party scene for you. Then you heard a male voice, deep and sultry as fuck, immediately sending a tingle down your spine.

“Need a hand with this?”

My guy, you should have put down yourself as a warning. Oh, jesus…

There was distant clatter that sounded like plates and glasses on a counter.

“I know. It's pretty boring out there, isn't it?”

He was talking to himself. Or in this case, to you. You caught yourself trying to legitimately reply to him.

“Oh, really? You have a kid, huh? I uh- if you don't mind me asking… is the father here tonight?”

Absolutely not, you thought to yourself. I’m very much single and willing to jump you in this kitchen.

“So you're a single parent,” he chuckled, “I don't wanna be crass. It's just… you're unnecessarily hot for a mom. Never would have guessed.”

You heard some rustling that panned to your right ear. Like he was there, brushing himself on you.

“Oh, sorry. I didn't- “

The guy stopped himself as if his breath actually hitched upon the contact.

“Would it be too presumptuous to assume you're as turned on as I am right now?”

It absolutely wouldn’t. This devil in your ears managed to get you wet with zero visual aids. He softly chuckled again.

“I mean, I can see your nipples. Are they usually this perky?”

It was mindblowing how you could actually feel a touch on you by just listening to something. Maybe the hype around the ASMR community was actually… legit?

“Oh, you're breastfeeding,” he apparently reached out for something and you heard crunching sounds, “These are really good by the way. Mind if I get some milk for my cookies?”

SHUT THE FUCK UP, DEMON DUDE, YOU FUCKING DID NOT!

“I can't stop thinking about you since the day you moved in,” you felt the fingertips on your scalp, “I've never wanted to fuck someone this hard before. You're fucking gorgeous.”

The brushing went on for quite some time as you were melting on your chair, and his voice panned to your left ear this time as if he was whispering.

“Feel me. See how hard you make me? Just a little taste, huh, what do you say?”

Shit just got interesting.

The sound that followed was really sticky like he was dipping his fingers into an entire box of vaseline, or in this case…

“Fuck, baby, you're soaked.”

You felt his lips all over your ears. Your entire body was covered in goosebumps so much so that it was tickling you everywhere.

“Don't be shy. Don't hide from me. You're so fucking beautiful.”

His request that followed the piece of fabric being discarded got you whimpering out loud.

“Feed me now.”

Oh, SHIT!

He kept on gently sucking, producing these wet sounds with his mouth and contently humming in your ears. You wet your fingers and started drawing circles on your nipples along with him.

“I've heard breast milk tastes like cantaloupe juice before,” he chortled, “It's true.”

He moved the tiniest bit away and demanded again.

“Spread those legs for me.”

Just HOW was he able to do that to you? You didn’t even know what this man looked like, but his voice possessed some supernatural powers apparently, getting you to obey his orders on cue.

“Shh, quiet. It's about to feel so damn good.”

He inhaled and exhaled slowly like he was doing some sort of breathing exercise and let out a husky moan.

“Fuck, you smell so nice.”

The mouth sounds that followed were just so intense. You had never felt anything like this before, crumbling to someone’s voice like that.

“Damn, baby, you taste even better.”

The man kept on humming. Moaning. Sucking. Slurping. As if he was right there between your legs. As if it wasn’t your own fingers chasing after you to your orgasm.

Oh, god, I'm about to fucking ascend.

“Yes. Yes, you can have my fingers, too.”

You changed hands and slipped two of your fingers inside, while fervently rubbing your clit with the other. You could hear the wet sounds of his fist jerking himself off accompanying his muffled moans. You were so close. So so close. All you needed was to hear his voice one more time.

“Oh, shit, I’m co- I’m fucking coming Fuck!”

Your toes curled as he groaned in your ears, panting, whimpering, trying to keep it down but tremendously failing at it, possibly alerting some folks in the vicinity. He gently chuckled again.

“How about we do this in my bed next time?”

You hysterically laughed at yourself once the scheduled programming of your sanity continued again. You hit the reblog button under the post and flat-out yelled a thank you to him.

“BEST! FUCKING! CONTENT! EVER!!! Fucking R E B L O G this shit! I'm coming for your asses if he ever deactivates! I love you, my sultry king. You have a new worshipper follower."

It didn't even take a minute before you saw a notification with a tag attached to it, from none other than the content creator, the Lucky Dragon himself.

#Bang on! 📢

Friday night you made your way to Hyejin’s studio where she was gonna hand you the keys and walk you through the specifications of the work of the night. You had already seen the designs created by the clients themselves, but since the appointment was already pretty late, you and Hyejin decided that you would only do the lining that day and she would do the shading later on. 

“So, are these bicep tattoos?”

“Better. You’ll see,” Hyejin giggled like she had something up her sleeve and walked towards the door.

“Calf tattoos?”

“Not telling. Thank you for doing this for me and enjoy!”

What the fuck is there to enjoy about this?

The long-awaited clients showed up a little past midnight, forcing you to eat all your previous assumptions about them. Two guys but definitely not the gym dudes you pictured. Both blonde and to top it all off ridiculously hot.

Oh, that’s the enjoyment factor.

“You’re not Hyejin,” the taller one with long hair pointed at you, looking a little out of it.

“Nope,” you glanced down at Hyejin’s appointment book, “The serpent and the dragon tattoo?”

“Here,” the other guy with shorter hair raised his hand like you were taking a roll call and gestured to himself and the second demigod present in the room, “We prefer Felix and Hyunjin, though.”

That voice… The tone… The accent… Seemed oddly familiar to you.

“This way please.”

You locked the front door and escorted them inside to start preparing. You had already outlined the stencils to save time; the sooner you got this over with, the better.

“Seems matching,” you commented in an attempt for an icebreaker, “Friendship tattoos?”

“Sort of,” Felix replied and turned to Hyunjin all annoyed, “I mean if somebody didn’t think theirs was somehow superior, it would be.”

“Dragons are literally just flying serpents that breathe fire,” Hyunjin scoffed sprawling on the leather couch, “They are very closely related, though.”

“Yeah, but dragons are more monstrous, not to mention the largest of serpents. You can’t catch Daenerys flying snakes, you know what I mean?”

“That’s rich, Lix. Death by venom is literally more torturous. Not to mention serpents have more grace.”

“By crawling on the floor?”

“By not vomiting carcinogen.”

You laughed to yourself, finding these guys weirdly charming and amusing in their own way; however, you were a little too used to the party scene to detect something else. Judging from their speaking mannerisms, blown pupils, and the occasional staggering and blank stares, they were high as a kite, most likely on molly.

And although you were trying not to dwell on it, you were going crazy over why that sexy-ass voice sounded familiar to you, but for the life of you, you couldn’t put your finger on it.

“Are you twins or something?”

Both guys turned to you simultaneously and they grinned like they rehearsed for this.

“You could say that,” Hyunjin responded and stretched his arms to both sides of the backrest. You laid out all your materials on the little table next to the chair and called out.

“Alright, who’s first?”

A brief silence ensued while Hyunjin checked you out from head to toe and he suddenly snapped out of it like he just registered the semantics of your sentence.

“My bad, I thought you meant something else. I’ll go first.”

“Why?” Felix immediately protested, “Because you think you could handle it better than me?”

“You wanna go first?”

“Fuck yeah I do,” he got up to make his way to the chair and started…

…unbuttoning his pants. Your astonishment was palpable.

“What are you doing?”

“Getting ready?”

“I don’t think Hyejin told her where exactly we want them,” Hyunjin smirked as he got up and walked towards you. He stood right behind you and spoke into your ear with a very soft voice.

“These are supposed to be pelvic tattoos, beautiful.”

You didn’t expect to shudder like this, but what was more interesting was that rather than being bothered by the lowkey advance, you were surprised to realize that you were able to… feel things.

Wow, it’s been a while.

“Fine. Drop your pants,” you grabbed the stencil to paste it on Felix’s crotch, “Just so you know, we’re just gonna do the lining today. Hyejin’s going to do the shading for you.”

“Because?”

“Because she’s much better and it’s the middle of the night?”

Felix put his hands under his head and got comfortable on the chair, “She wouldn’t put you in charge if she didn’t trust you. You can practice on me if you want. I have all night.”

You held his gaze for the briefest moment and tilted your head with a smile. Hyunjin pulled up a stool next to you to watch the shenanigans closely and the games began.

And not too long after devolved into something quite interesting.

At first, you thought you were hearing things, but Felix was indeed sighing as you kept dragging the needle on his crotch. You weren’t sure whether that was because the sting was hurting him or because he actually…

...enjoyed it.

The proximity of you over his exposed cock eventually went straight to his head, not to mention the excessive serotonin currently blasting in his veins courtesy of some happy pills, and he let out an audible groan, forcing you to notice that he was rock hard. Yet not a shred of shame was to be found in either of these criminally beautiful men.

“Damn, Lix, liking it a bit too much?” Hyunjin chuckled.

“You okay?” you asked Felix.

“Yeah,” he opened his eyes to hold your gaze, “But can you kiss it better?”

You shouldn’t have been smiling at this. Why were you smiling?

“Do you wanna risk an infection?”

“Yes, please,” a smug grin adorned his lips.

You just snickered and proceeded to grab some more ink on the needle, but he wouldn’t let go. 

“No harm in touching me, you know. Just once?”

You touched down on his skin again, and when he felt that needle sting, Felix flat out cursed with a breathy exhale this time.

“Oh, fuck.”

“You can suck him, too, if the fancy strikes. He wouldn’t mind,” Hyunjin giggled, “You’re annihilating the guy.”

You smiled again. Why the fuck were you smiling?

“Are you tense by any chance, beautiful?” Hyunjin scooted closer to you, “Can I offer some stress relief?”

Yes, you’re inducing a massive amount of sexual tension in this room right now and it’s been a hot minute since I wanted to fuck someone’s brains out.

“Unless you wanna carry a mistake right on your crotch for the rest of your lives, maybe not,” you wiped off the excess ink on Felix and got up to change the needle for Hyunjin.

“Or we can use a timeout before my turn,” he spoke from his seat, “And maybe take some other turns if you don’t mind.”

You almost dropped the tattoo gun in your hand upon his words. Felix wasn’t moving from his seat, eyes piercing through your soul and eating it alive as you approached them. Hyunjin got up to his feet, slowly took the gun from your hand, and put it down.

“We can, right?”

How was it that a person could drip excessive amounts of eroticism like that? Hyunjin fucking paralyzed you in your place with just a mere gaze and gently slithered his slender fingers behind your neck to kiss you. You wanted to fucking die because of how delicious it felt. He broke the kiss and guided your chin to make you face Felix.

“Look at what you did to him, beautiful. Can’t come down from his high. Have mercy on the guy, will you?”

You had absolutely no idea what kind of wizardry Hyunjin practiced because you felt utterly possessed, making your way to Felix upon instruction. He reached his hand to you to pull you closer and inhaled your scent before speaking.

“You smell so good, you know? So sweet,” Felix brushed your cheek, “But I bet you fuck like an angel on acid. So beautiful, but a complete freak.”

He took your lips still moist from Hyunjin’s trace on you between his and gave you probably one of the most sensual kisses you ever experienced in your goddamn life. No rush, so wet, and adorned with his sighs into your mouth.

“You are, aren’t you?” Felix devilishly smiled, convinced he was right about his assumption, “Would rather die than be a pillow princess.”

“Are you always this presumptuous?”

“When your hunches have always proven to be right, yes,” he dragged his thumb on your lips, “Would you be my savage princess tonight? Unleash yourself on me?”

You lowered yourself between his legs as a response and kissed the tip of his cock. When you moved away from him, the sight of the trail of the precum he was leaking connected to your lips made Felix twitch hard.

“Jesus-”

You turned around to spot the source of movement behind you. It was Hyunjin sliding your top up just enough to reveal your back and breasts. Felix touched your chin to make you face him again.

“Eyes on me, princess.”

Oh, this guy had severe ego problems and that was so fucking hot for some reason. You glued your gaze on his and didn’t even blink as you led his flushed cock in your mouth while Hyunjin kept kissing your bare back.

“Fucking yes.”

You closed your eyes and started blowing Felix accompanied by languid strokes on his length. When you felt Hyunjin’s hand on your breasts, the contact forced a moan out of you.

“You like being touched there, beautiful?” he chuckled and placed kisses on your shoulder blades, “Oh, I’m gonna make you feel so fucking good. You're gonna melt under me.”

He reached for the front of your pants and unzipped it, easily sliding it down your ass by taking complete advantage of you being on all fours in front of Felix.

“Just look at that ass,” he grazed his teeth on the sensitive skin, “Spread your legs for me a little more, beautiful. Let me see those folds.”

You parted your legs to provide Hyunjin the access he craved and felt the tiny jolt induced by a wet swipe on your core first. When he started eating you in earnest you involuntarily moaned on Felix’s cock.

“Fuck!” he exclaimed, clearly loving those vibrations running towards him from your throat, “More. Eat more. I need the princess fucking screaming on this cock.”

Hyunjin’s lips and tongue began gliding on your pussy with more pressure. The more hungrily he ate you out, the louder you moaned into Felix.

“Hold my hands. There you go.”

As Hyunjin picked up his pace, you picked up yours as well, but apparently, Felix had other plans in his mind.

“Oh, don’t. Not yet. I need to cum when he fucks into you. Take a breather.”

He gently stopped you and leaned down to suck on your breasts. His plush lips on your skin broke goosebumps all over you.

“Kiss me, princess.”

Why? Just what was it about his smoldering looks just demanding your attention on him, his voice embracing you like a gentle fire cracking on a cool night? 

“You taste like me,” he smiled and dove back into your lips again. Hyunjin’s tongue finding its way to your entrance ripped another moan from your throat.

“He eats pussy like there’s no tomorrow, doesn’t he?” Felix chuckled, “But I’m gonna take you there.”

He pushed his fingers into your mouth to coat them with your saliva and guided his fingers on your clit. He was rubbing the throbbing bundle of nerves gently but it felt oh so wet. He pressed his forehead against yours.

“Just like that, princess. Feel too good not to cum, doesn’t it?” he stole a kiss from your lips and started rubbing you harder, “You’re gonna give it to me now.”

“Felix.”

“Go faster, Hyun. Give it to me, princess. Nice and loud.”

“Fuck, please.”

“You know I need that cream.”

“Oh GOD!”

Felix burst into a demonic smile as you came, excessively satisfied with what he just caused, but with the smugness like he was the only one who caused that.

“There it is. Ready for him to hit that now, aren’t we princess?” Felix devoured your lips again, not giving you a chance to collect yourself, “Wrap those pretty lips around me now.”

You repositioned yourself between Felix’s legs and arched your ass up for Hyunjin. You could not fucking believe Hyejin was actually right. You never knew how badly you needed to feel an actual human inside you to stretch you open like that. Hyunjin being well-endowed in the girth department must have been the universe spoiling you after that fucking draught you had gone through.

“Fuck! Too tight. Way too tight.”

Hyunjin settling into you like that, violently rubbing against your walls in the meantime made you dizzy. You were literally able to feel every inch of him with all your receptors, completely overloading every single pleasure nerve in your body. The closer he got to bottoming out, the deeper you were taking Felix down your throat out of sheer eagerness. 

“God… damn princess. Feels way too fucking good. Can you take it deeper for me?”

“You were a fucking idiot to go on that chair first, Lix,” Hyunjin deliriously laughed once he bottomed out, “You have no idea how good this feels.”

You clenched so hard upon Hyunjin’s declaration that he lost a piece of his sanity.

“FUCK beautiful, you’re trying to get me to blow?”

“Is she clenching?”

“So fucking hard. Like she’s not already tight enough.”

Hyunjin finally began thrusting into you and you were incredulous that you almost forgot how good this actually felt. Having someone grope you to pin you in your place and fucking use you as an instrument to satisfy their carnal needs, getting lost in you, cursing, namecalling, panting, sweating, obscene sounds of skin against skin all over the place culminating into that eruption of mutual pleasure inducing a violent earthquake in your body. Pure ecstasy.

“Jesus fuck! Fucking swallows me inside,” Hyunjin’s movements got harsher over utter enthusiasm, “Fuck ink, I’d kill to tattoo your walls with my cum instead.”

‘Do it!’ you wanted to scream but all you were able to produce was a muffled moan no matter how loud.

“Shh, manners, princess. Don’t speak with your mouth full.”

“I need to hear her say it.”

Felix locked his gaze on Hyunjin, dangerously daring for some reason. He guided you to stop.

“Say it for him princess.”

You turned your head around for a counteroffer, “How about you give me a tramp stamp instead? Right above my ass.”

Hyunjin’s lips curled into an absolutely maniacal smile and he shifted the gear to the maximum like he was trying to pass through you. You wrapped your lips around Felix again and started swirling your tongue as you kept sucking him.

“Oh, GOD close. So close. Clench, beautiful,” Hyunjin reached for your clit from behind you. That extra stimulation caused you to moan even louder. When you clenched, you automatically sucked harder, pushing Felix towards the edge one stroke at a time.

“Don’t stop. Fucking HELL, don’t stop, let me cum for you. Louder, princess, come on.”

You did as you were told, providing Felix with the vibrations that were gonna get him to see white while Hyunjin was relentlessly pounding into you and fervently rubbing your clit.

“Clench harder. Just a little more, beautiful. I’m almost there.”

You were fucking spent. Too much stimulation through multiple channels was forcing your sanity to fade away in the most delectable way.

“Oh, god, harder. Suck me harder. HARDER!”

“FUCK!”

As Felix unloaded in your mouth with loud groans, Hyunjin pulled out of you to give you the tramp stamp you asked for and you rubbed yourself to your own orgasm to the feeling. You could almost make out a shape being drawn on you with the way that warm milky liquid squirted on your back.

“Look how pretty my cum looks on you. Wouldn’t mind tattooing this arch every single night,” Hyunjin placed a kiss on your back and spoke into your ear, “I fucking love tramp stamps, beautiful.”

“You’re good?” Felix asked you while brushing the stray strands of hair away from your face.

“A little dazed, that’s all,” you flashed a fucked out smile.

“Sorry, but not really,” Felix chuckled, “That was impossible to resist.”

“Where do you keep your wet wipes, beautiful? I’ll clean you first. When you feel okay, you can do my lining.”

You pointed at the drawer right next to you, still trying to catch your breath. Hyunjin grabbed a couple and started wiping himself off the small of your back. Then he added with that damn velvety voice of his stitched into a smile.

“Then I’m gonna do you one more time.”

You laughed with your eyes still closed, “Still not risking an infection.”

He tilted his head and looked at you like he was genuinely not following you.

“What are you talking about? We’re not getting our fingers tattooed.”

NEXT CHAPTER »

AUTHOR'S NOTE

🍮Like my content? Consider supporting my work with a pudding!

If you enjoyed this story, feel free to share your thoughts with me in reblogs, tags, or in my inbox. As long as you're kind, that is.

-R. (CB97%)

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no way I found this just now 🥹 too cute!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Comfortable With You

➤ summary: it’s hard finding the love of your life on dating apps, which is why recruiting your roommate to help you get out of bad dates seems like a good idea. felix is the perfect candidate—his voice alone causes your dates to run in the opposite direction. with his help, you don’t even have to go through the awkward rejection phase. your plan seems to be working—until you kiss him

➤ pairing: lee felix x reader

➤ genre: roommates-to-lovers, fluff

➤ warnings: cursing, food & eating, alcohol consumption

➤ word count: 10k

➤ a/n: this is my fic for the summer 2 lovers collab hosted by @feliix​ ! everyone please be sure to show the other writers a lot of love for their fics <3

“You’re really neat, but… I don’t know if this is going to go anywhere.” You grimace at your own words, pulling the phone away from your ear to smack your forehead lightly. Neat? Really? That’s how you were going to console a guy after rejecting him?

Keep reading

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Sorry, I Love You ~ Felix

"Felix is your friend with benefits. Your arrangement is perfect since both of you are too busy for anything more. But when the lines start to blur between lust and love, will you be able to navigate your own feelings before one of you gets hurt?"

All In ~ OT8 (university!au) series : Part Two

Pairing: Felix x fem!reader

Word Count: 17k

Genre: 18+ University AU | Fluff | LOTS of angst | SMUT | Established friendship with OT8 | Established friends with benefits with Felix | Friends with benefits to lovers | Possessive/Jealous Felix |

Content Warnings: Mature contents, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT 18+ | Alcohol consumption | Cursing/swearing | Dry Humping/Grinding/Straddling | pet names (use of Darling, Handsome etc) | LOTS of Angst | Detailed makeout scenes | Moaning/groaning | Descriptions of male genitalia | Possessive and Jealous Felix | Mentions of Intercourse | Friends with Benefits arrangement (Felix and Y/N) | Arguments | Mentions of cigarettes (Felix is an avid smoker) | Moments of commitment issues | Moments of vulnerability | Major blue balls for Felix (soz not soz) (Let me know if I missed anything) This part will not make much sense unless the parts before are read, as events and character dynamics shift and overlap in each part. Ensure you're caught up here.

A/N: THANK YOU FOR BEING PATIENT I KNOW IT TOOK FOREVER AND IM SO SORRY!! This is my first time writing anything this smutty so please give me your feedback, but go easy on me 😅 I hope you're all well and are liking the series so far! Chan x Y/N for Part Three!!

It was late into a Sunday night, and you were sat at the dining room table, books and notes scattered across it underneath you. Your dining room table had been perfectly divided down the middle, your notes and books on the side you were sitting at, and your roommate’s belongings scattered across the other. You’d been here for the past few hours studying, trying to wrap your brain around a code sequence you needed for your assignment.

You had always wanted to be a game designer/developer ever since you were a kid, and you missed the naivety of the child version of yourself that thought the process to creating video games was a lot simpler than it really was.

The truth was you were more talented in character design, world creation and the graphics side of video games, coding had never really been your strong suit, but alas it was needed to get the job done.

You hadn’t realised you’d begun to drift to sleep amongst your notes until a knock came from your dorm door snapping you away from your drowsiness.

You scrunched your face and glanced to the clock hanging on the kitchen wall. It read 10:23PM.

You wondered who would be knocking on your dorm door this late, your roommate had texted you only a few moments ago to say she was staying at Jeongin’s dorm, so it couldn’t be her.

Crime was basically non-existent on your campus, so you felt safe enough to answer the door. You stood from your chair at the dining room table and walked across the living room to open the door.

You unlocked the door and swung it open to see Felix smiling at you nervously, his skin illuminating from the hallway lights, his blondish silver looking hair was half up in a manbun and his round glasses were nestled upon his nose and amongst his freckles.

Every time you saw Felix you wondered how he could put barely any effort into his appearance and yet look so handsome every single time. He was wearing baggy grey sweatpants and a simple black t-shirt that hung loosely over his muscular figure, a pair of black canvas styled shoes were on his feet and his backpack was slung over one shoulder.

His sudden arrival meant one thing as per your agreement and your mouth watered at the thought of it.

Felix was your classmate turned friend with benefits. Your situationship as your roommate liked to call it, had started around ten months ago. You had both started studying at this campus a year and a few months ago and you were now a few months into your second year of your four year double majored degree in Game Development and Game Design. Something you had in common with Felix.

You and Felix had bonded over similar interests during the icebreaker introductions during the first few days of classes and became close friends straight away. Four months into your friendship with Felix and in drunken state at a 3Racha dorm party, you had found yourself in bed the next morning with Felix curled up into your side and both of you completely naked.

Neither of you could deny your attraction to one another, but both agreed your study came first and that there was no time for anything more and no need to complicate things more than they needed to be. Therefore, creating the arrangement that led Felix to be standing at your door tonight. Lust and nothing more.

“Hey Lixie.” You smiled mischievously opening the door wider in a welcoming manner, begging him to step into your dorm.

Instead of walking past you and into your dorm like you had offered, Felix gave you a smirk as he took in your flustered appearance by his abrupt arrival and walked up to you, pulling you into his arms for a warm hug.

He wrapped his arms over the tops of your shoulders, nestling his face into the side of your head and into your hair. You felt him breath in your scent and as he exhaled, he breathed out a soft and airy sounding, “hey darling.”

You buried your face into his chest thankful he had decided to show up unannounced. You took this moment to breathe in his scent like he had just done to you, he smelled how he normally did, hints of freshly squeezed lemon and fully bloomed orange blossoms that had been drifting in the sea breeze.

Over his usual scent you smelt the powerful scent of unmistakeable cigarette smoke attached to his clothes, indicating he must have had one on the way over to yours. You should hate the smell, but the scent of cigarette’s added to his charm and the smell had now become of comfort to you.

You loved and hated how much you enjoyed Felix’s sudden presence.

It wasn’t meant to be this way; you had initially agreed to organise days to meet up when needing to release stress or one of you just wanted some fun. As time progressed and you became more comfortable around each other, it turned to hurried text messages letting the other know you were on the way or both of you would just head back to one of your dorms after hanging out with your shared friend group.

You felt him shuffle with you still tightly held in his arms, pulling you further into your dorm and shutting the door behind you both. You tried to wriggle out of his grasp to walk yourself, but he just squeezed you tighter and with his deep voice whispered through your hair near your ear, “no, let me hold you.”

You giggled against his chest, as you stumbled trying to keep in sync with where Felix was trying to maneuverer you both. You heard Felix shrug off his backpack, and he let out a defeated laugh. Felix gave up on his plans to stumble to your bedroom and you felt the world flip as he holstered you up bridal style to carry you the rest of the way.

Felix placed you down onto your back on the bed and climbed over your figure, trapping you in place under him with his arms on either side of your head and his legs either side of your hips. You heard his shoes clatter to the ground, and he paused looking at you for a moment to take off his glasses and place them on the side table next to your bed.

He looked down at you with a smirk, his eyes shining through the dark as the only light in the room was the streaks of the living room light glowing softly into your bedroom.

“So, what brings you here tonight Lix, how can I be of service?” You asked giving him a seductive smile, reaching up to tuck a strand of his fluffy hair out of his eye and behind his ear.

His smile grew fonder at your actions, and he leaned down to press a kiss into the very tip of your nose.

“Honestly, I missed you and I didn’t want you to be alone tonight.” He admitted continuing to press kisses over your face but avoiding your lips.

“Aren’t you a gentleman.” You winked up at him causing him to huff out a small chuckle at your flirtatiousness.

“Someone is eager tonight.” Felix commented moving his position down to rest on his elbows bringing his face closer to yours.

You leaned up from the bed and pressed your lips against Felix’s, too impatient to wait any longer. You kissed him slowly and he responded instantly against you, bringing one of his hands down to your side and pressing his fingers gentling into the skin that was poking out between your pyjama top and shorts.

His lips were soft despite a few cracks here and there and they moved expertly with yours from the months of practice. A warm feeling spread through you, and you felt the familiar feeling of want and lust growing, but before you could get carried away, Felix pulled away breaking the kiss.

Felix pressed another kiss to your nose ignoring your confused gaze as he rolled off you to lay beside you on his back and used his hand on your side to pull you into him for a cuddle.

“Is it okay if we don’t do anything tonight?” Felix asked shyly after a few moments had passed by and you hadn’t spoken or tried to do anything else.

You turned your head and looked up at him, getting comfortable against him by draping an arm over his chest and entangling a leg over his thigh and through his legs.

“Of course,” You quickly clarified with, “Although, you know that’s not really what our arrangement is for.”

“Why not?” Felix asked looking down to meet your gaze, his cheeks were slightly flushed as if the conversation was making him slightly nervous, “We are friends with benefits, aren’t we? These are benefits.”

You giggled at his explanation and if you were being honest, he wasn’t wrong, but he knew why this wasn’t a part of the arrangement.

Neither of you could deny the attraction you had for one another. This was one of the main reasons you had strict rules with the arrangement. You both wanted to make sure that the line between lust and love was clear and no boundaries were being crossed, to not complicate anything.

The rules being: 1. NO CATCHING FEELINGS

This was a big one, it wasn’t just your friendship on the line, you were also classmates and shared the same circle of friends. It was bad enough you had already crossed the line of being intimate with each other the last thing you needed was falling in love with each other too.

2. SEX ONLY

This rule was clearly being broken tonight and if you were honest with yourself, it had been broken A LOT throughout your time with Felix, but you always tried to focus on what your situationship was really for.

3. NO ONE KNOWS

This rule was broken within the first 3 months of your arrangement, Hyunjin might have been a little traumatised when he came back to the dorm earlier than expected one day and it spread like wildfire throughout your friend group.

4. NO SLEEPING WITH OTHER PEOPLE

This was purely for safety reasons, although the idea of Felix being with anyone else did make you uncomfortable and it wouldn’t be a nice position to be put in.

Now that you thought about it, maybe your rules weren’t as strict as they were intended to be…

“You make a valid point, permission to cuddle granted.” You announced playfully snuggling into him closer.

At your words, Felix’s smile lit up his eyes and he pressed a long-wet kiss to your forehead as a thank you.

You both stayed tangled up in each other for a while in a comfortable silence, breathing deeply and slow, and you could feel your eyes growing heavier from the natural warmth Felix’s body was radiating.

“Darling, are you up to anything this Saturday night?” Felix asked suddenly while one of his hands reached up to lazily rake his fingers through your hair.

You thought for a moment, “Not that I can think of, why?”

“I was speaking to Chan tonight and they are having a 3Racha party.” Felix stated his voice was deeper now and you could tell sleep was clawing at him too.

“hmm” You hummed thinking back to previous 3Racha parties, to your first night with Felix, the night you danced on top of 3Racha’s kitchen bench completely wasted with Chan’s girlfriend and to all the other times you enjoyed relaxing, drinking with your closest friends. You smiled at the fond memories.

Felix sensed that you were beginning to drift off by your disconnection from the conversation, so he guided you up and under the covers and pressed another few kisses to your forehead.

Even though you were in and out of awareness, you were very aware of Felix pulling away from you completely and the bed dipping and then rising as he stood from the bed.

You let out a whine at his departure and he responded with a chuckle.

“I’m just making sure everything is locked up and turning the lights off.” He spoke to you warmly and you heard his footsteps exit your bedroom and disappear temporarily into the rest of the house before he re-entered your room that was now in complete darkness.

Felix had been here so many times, he didn’t even need to see to make it back to your side tucked underneath the blankets with you wrapped up in his arms. You felt Felix’s skin under your hand that rested on his chest. His shirt must have been discarded before he climbed back into bed and the warmth that was seeping out of him into your skin was lulling you closer and closer to sleep.

“Sleep well darling.” Felix whispered lowly pressing a kiss to your lips that you wish had lasted longer.

“Night Lixie.” You murmured lightly, eyes closed and completely surrendering to your dreams.

Before you completely fell asleep, you couldn’t help but notice the slight tingle to your lips where Felix’s lips had just been and the warmth that wasn’t only hovering on your skin, but also lighting up your insides and most importantly your heart.

“Y/N…darling…wake up gorgeous.” Felix’s voice sounding like an angel calling from the heavens was whispering to you from beside you.

You slowly fluttered your eyes open waking up to Felix pressing kisses into your face and hair as you blinked the sleep away.

“There she is.” Felix smiled once he noticed you were awake and pressed a soft peck to your lips making you smile back at him sleepily.

“Morning.” You murmured back trying to burry your head into the crook of his neck, refusing to acknowledge reality and the fact you had classes soon.

“I thought I’d lost you to the Sandman for a second there.” Felix joked his fingers teasing the skin exposed between your pyjamas sending a shiver up your spine.

“I was having a good dream.” You mumbled into the skin of his neck as you pressed light kisses there.

“What were you dreaming about?” Felix asked his morning voice deep, grainy and charming, making you want to tell him all about your dream where the two of you were working at the same gaming company together and living out your dream careers.

“Wouldn’t you like to know.” You teased poking his side and raising your head to smirk down at him.

“That would be why I asked.” Felix quick witted back with a smirk of his own.

In response you simply poked out your tongue and pushed yourself away from him to a sitting position so you could stretch out the upper half of your body.

You felt Felix’s arms snake around your waist from behind as he sat up behind you and placed his face on your shoulder with a pout on his lips.

“I don’t want to go to classes today, let’s skip.” Felix suggested squeezing you tightly from behind and leaving a trail of kisses from the corner of your jaw to the top of your shoulders.

One thing you had learned quickly into your arrangement with Felix was how overly affectionate he was. It wasn’t a bad thing by any means, you loved the attention he gave you and it gave an aspect of thrill knowing you were the only one he treated like this, and it only ever occurred behind closed doors. Like it was a secret only you two knew of.

“Because no one will be suspicious if both of us are missing from class...” You trailed off rolling your eyes.

You hadn’t managed to keep the secret of your arrangement from your friend group, but you were thankful no one in your shared classes with Felix seemed to have picked up on the looks you two frequently shared, or the flirtatious comments Felix would often tease you with.

Felix let out a groan and dropped his entire body weight onto your back making you slump forward unprepared.

“Don’t make me goooo.” He pleaded pushing his weight onto you until you had no choice but to fall sideways to relieve the pressure.

You whined pushing him away from you playfully.

“You can do as you please Felix, but I am going to class.” With a final poke to Felix’s nose, you climbed out of bed heading into the shower to get ready for the day ahead.

A few minutes past and you began cleaning your skin, letting the warm water wake you up completely, when Felix poked his head into the bathroom.

“I’m going to head back to my dorm to get ready, if I’m not at the first class, I’ll see you at the second!” Felix shouted to you over the loud rushing of the water.

“See you then!” You yelled back letting the water hit the back of your neck to loosen the tension that had built in your shoulders from the previous night of studying.

“Bye darling!” Felix farewelled leaving you to shower. You could barely hear his footsteps leaving over the water, but you finally heard the apartment door shut announcing Felix’s exit.

For the first time in a while, as you stilled in place under the stream of water, you felt the warm water run cold. It was like you’d run out of warm water, but then it slowly dawned on you, the steam was still building around you in the shower stall. It wasn’t the warmth from the water that had abandoned you, it was the warmth you felt within you when Felix was around.

You got to class just on time, and you were surprised to see Felix was already there with a warm smile spreading across his cheeks as he watched you walk into the computer lab.

Although there was no assigned seating in this class, it didn’t stop everyone from naturally claiming their own spot within the class and Felix was quick to claim the two computers by the window for the two of you, glaring at anyone who tried to take the spot next to him that was unofficially reserved for you.

“I’m surprised to see you here.” You grinned at Felix while unloading your bag with what you needed for the class ahead.

Felix groaned at the sudden realisation class would be starting soon and he was here instead of tucked away in your bedroom, with you wrapped around him like you were the last two people on Earth.

“I need the attendance marks. I’m not worried about our group project, but the assignment we were given for coding is kicking my arse.” Felix complained resting his head onto the hand of his arm that was propped up on the desk.

You rolled forward on your desk chair to get closer to him, reaching out to playfully tousle his hair with your fingers, “At least you won’t fail it alone.”

A smile grew back over his lips, “You? Failing coding? What a shock.” Felix teased knowing full well you weren’t good with coding as the sarcasm dripped from his voice.

“Haha, you’re hilarious.” You rolled your eyes, “I am genuinely shocked you’re struggling too though, you’re normally extremely good with coding?” You questioned him with a raised brow, leaning back into your desk chair getting yourself comfortable by adjusting some of the settings from its previous user.

Felix copied your motions and settled himself into his desk chair and pondered your words before smirking, “Maybe I’m just too distracted these days.”

A laugh erupted out of you, drawing the attention of some of your classmates, bringing your awareness of your surroundings back to you. You covered your laugh with a cough and sent a half serious glare in Felix’s direction, not even bothering to respond to him.

Your professor came to begin the class not long after, asking you to split up into your selected groups for the group project and use this class time to work on it.

You had been put into a group with Felix and two others from your class. One being a very timid, but kind girl with shoulder length black hair and round glasses concealing most of her face.

The other being the class clown, a stocky looking guy who could potentially give Changbin a run for his money in an arm wrestle. You often wondered why he even took this as his major when he spent most of the time making untasteful jokes at the expense of your other classmates.

The four of you were sat around the desks off to the side of the room away from the computers and all of you had your laptops out in front of you.

Your group project was to create a video game idea, including examples of how it would look, the setting, the storyline and some clips of completed animation for the game. Your group would then need to present it to the class and sell it to them. It was worth 50% of your grade so you were all taking it very seriously, well most of you.

Felix was hurriedly typing away on his laptop as he was doing some research for the setting of where your game would take place, gathering inspiration and writing notes on what he had found.

The timid girl in your group named Hana, was drawing on her electric artistry pad that was connected to her laptop, drawing out some character designs and working on some animation.

You were currently researching weaponry and armoury, creating a mood board of things you liked and comparing notes with Felix every now and again to make sure you were on the same track.

But then there was Yunseo the class clown. He was leaned back in his chair, large headset clogging his ears and you were almost certain he wasn’t doing the task he was assigned to, due the smirk plastered on his face.

You tried to ignore him, but when he began snickering you couldn’t hold yourself back any longer. Nothing annoyed you more than someone not pulling their weight in a group project, especially when it was 50% of your grades and he was just hoping to cruise along and put in barely any effort. Not on your watch.

“Something funny about coding?” You asked glaring across the table at Yunseo.

He didn’t even seem phased that you had caught him not doing his part and just casually moved his earphones down slightly, returning your glare with his own, still smirking like he found the situation amusing.

“I actually finished the code a while ago.” He said with confidence leaning back further in his chair and crossing his arms over his chest to symbolise you weren’t intimidating him at all.

You gritted your teeth in annoyance and closed your laptop in front of you to show him you weren’t messing around.

This caught Felix and Hana’s attention, Felix looked between you both taking in your confrontation stances and Hana sunk back in her chair turning up the soft music she was listening to, trying not to get caught up in what was occurring.

“And you didn’t think to let us know? Or do something else more productive with your time?” You questioned annoyance clear in your tone as you copied his posture, crossing your own arms across your chest, showing him you weren’t backing down.

He scoffed and rolled his eyes at you, “Who are you, my mother?”

The lack of respect he had for you and the other members of your group was evident, but if he thought he could get away with treating you all like shit and getting you all to do the work for him, he was wrong.

“If I was, I’d be disappointed to have a son like you.” You effortlessly spat, fixing your glare like you had fire raging in your eyes. You were pissed. You had spent enough time in the gaming industry or even the gaming community to know the underling sexism that radiated out of too many people to count. Yunseo’s attitude toward you was only reminding you of that and igniting a fire within you.

You saw anger rage behind Yunseo’s eyes, and he moved forward slowly, but powerfully as he stared you down, trying to intimidate you into submission with his gaze, but you weren’t budging.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” He basically growled at you, gripping the table in front of him tightly like he was trying to calm himself down.

You felt Felix stiffen next you and his gaze looked straight ahead not even looking in Yunseo’s direction.

“Watch your fucking tone.” Felix spoke slowly and calmly, but his deep voice was stern and clearly warning Yunseo to back down.

Yunseo for the first time since you started the confrontation broke eye contact with you and changed his glare to Felix.

“Or what?” Yunseo taunted puckering his lips toward Felix.

You saw Felix snap his head in Yunseo’s direction and in a flash, he had risen to his feet to stand up to Yunseo who also stood.

Hana let out a shriek and you jumped up getting in between Felix and Yunseo, facing Felix.

Although Yunseo was a strong looking guy, you weren’t worried about Felix getting injured, he’d done taekwondo for twelve years, he was more than capable of taking care of himself during a fight. It was more the watchful eye that the professor was sending over to your group that was concerning you.

You grabbed onto Felix’s wrist firmly trying to ground him, “Felix, calm down” you tried to speak softly trying not to alert anyone else of what was going on.

You felt Yunseo’s breath hit the back of your neck and you froze with eyes growing wide at how close he was, and you felt Felix react to his closeness, feeling his muscles contract under your grasp. Felix’s eyes were still fixed on the man behind you, and he moved right up into you in a protective way, glaring over you.

“Felix.” You hissed opting to instead drag him out of the room and away from the situation.

Yunseo held his cocky smirk but didn’t say anything further while he held eye contact with Felix as you tugged him away and out of view.

Once you were out of site and around the side of the building you let go of Felix’s wrist and let out a sigh turning to face him, but before you could say anything Felix rushed over to you with a concerned look on his face.

He took your face into his hands and caressed you gently while he scanned over you, “Are you okay? He’s such a jerk.”

Your eyes widened at Felix’s sudden shift in demeanour. He was ready to kill Yunseo inside or at the bare minimum beat the shit out of him, but now he was back to the usual Felix you knew, soft and caring.

“Felix, I’m fine, I’ve dealt with worse.” You reassured him, reaching up and grasping his hands pulling them away from your face.

He frowned at you in response, and you saw his composure come back to him as he relaxed his shoulders.

“That guy is such a dick.” Felix cursed rocking his head side to side in annoyance like he was trying to stretch the muscle there and couldn’t.

You let out another sign and leaned up against the building wall with your back to it.

“Yes, but you didn’t have to go all psycho on him, I was handling it.” You crossed your arms across your chest again but this time it was in a relaxed way.

You weren’t annoyed that Felix had defended you back there, it was actually quite attractive watching Felix’s devotion for you as he defended your honour. The truth was you had always stuck to your independence, not wanting anyone to feel like they needed to protect you, you wanted to be your own knight in shining armour.

Felix arched an eyebrow at you and came over to you placing a hand on the wall either side of you, like he had done the previous night in your room. It made your stomach erupt with butterflies as he ducked his head down low to look deeply into your eyes.

“You’re right, I didn’t have to act like that.” He agreed placing a quick peck to your nose before continuing, “But I wanted to. No one and I mean no one, gets to talk to you like that- especially in front of me.”

You audibly swallowed the saliva that had pooled in your mouth at his words and tried to push away the fluttering within you. What was Felix doing to you? It was as if he had gone rogue on your arrangement, the lines were beginning to blur, and your fight or flight was kicking in.

You ducked under Felix’s right arm, escaping the position he had you in against the wall and put some distance between you.

“For what it’s worth, thank you Lix.” You said eyes looking at the ground as you shifted nervously, “But you know how I feel about our classmates knowing what’s going on, next time I’ve got it, okay?”

You saw Felix’s composure falter for a second, but he covered it almost instantly, leaning himself back against the wall, arms crossed as you had been a moment ago.

Felix nodded before looking away from you and off into the distance.

“Do you mind grabbing my stuff? I can’t be in class with that dickhead right now.” Felix asked scratching the back of his head with a sheepish grin, a habit he had adapted when he felt guilty.

“Sure.” You nodded turning to head back to class.

You paused in place. You felt awkward leaving things like this, and you didn’t want Felix to think you were mad at him, so you turned and skipped over to Felix pressing a kiss into his check whispering in his ear, “It was really hot though.”

With that you left a gobsmacked Felix leant up against the wall as you hurried off to go and collect his things.

When you returned to the computer lab, Yunseo was gone and Hana was sitting alone at the table, head centimetres away from her electronic sketchpad finishing off an animation she was working on.

“Looks great so far Hana!” You complimented as you began to gather Felix’s and your things, deciding you didn’t want to be in class anymore either.

Hana jumped a little, having been too absorbed in her drawing to notice you approach the table at all.

“Thanks.” She mumbled shyly giving you a quick glance before continuing her drawing.

“We’re heading out for the day; Yunseo has ruined our mood. Felix and I will make sure to send you what we worked on today.” You explained to Hana as you swung your bag over your shoulder and held Felix’s in your other hand.

Hana nodded, looking up from her sketchpad to address you, “Yunseo and Professor Choi had an argument and Yunseo stormed off.”

You let out a sigh and used your spare hand to gently squeeze Hana’s shoulder, “Don’t worry about it, I’ll sort Yunseo out another time and get him back on track. Just focus on what you need to do, and Felix and I will deal with the rest.” You gave her a smile trying to reassure her as much as you were trying to reassure yourself.

“Okay.” She replied, “See you.”

You quickly exchanged goodbyes with Hana and headed out of the door with the stuff you had collected, trying not to make Felix wait too long.

Felix seemed surprised as he saw you round the corner with not only his backpack, but your study bag and raised an eyebrow at you. He had sparked up a cigarette since you left him and was breathing out a puff of smoke as you extended his backpack to him.

“Want to get some breakfast and act like this morning hasn’t happened?” You asked him, shrugging casually.

Felix grinned warmly at you and took a long drag of the cigarette between his fingers, before blowing the smoke in your direction teasingly.

Anyone else would be offended by the action, but Felix knew regardless of how much you criticized him for his unhealthy habit, you found it extremely attractive.

You scrunched your nose and pouted as the harsh scent of cigarette smoke slapped your nose.

“Sure darling, my shout.” Felix agreed to your suggestion, throwing the last of his cigarette on the floor and stamping it out with his shoe.

Felix took in your pouty expression from him smoking and reached out pinching your cheeks inward with one hand to push your pout out further to which he pressed his lips against yours briefly.

“I promise I’ll ditch the cigs eventually.” He smirked giving you a wink to which you rolled your eyes and pulled your head away from his grip.

“Whatever, let’s go before I change my mind.” You huffed heading off into the direction of your group’s local coffee shop hangout with Felix falling into step beside you.

The week had flown by quickly and you’d spent most of your time working on the group project or trying to finish your coding assignment.

You had learned that Yunseo was chatted by the professor that day for his poor behaviour and was told if he didn’t fix things and prove he did his part of the assignment to the best of his ability, he risked failing the unit and having to repeat it next term. Ever since that day he had suddenly become more enthusiastic to participate.

It was now Friday night, the night before the 3Racha dorm party and you were currently curled up on your bed with Felix watching a K-Drama he had recommended, on your mini projector for your weekly Netflix and chill night.

Your Netflix and chill nights were never fixed to one certain day, but they had to occur at least once per week, and they were used to relieve your stress from the week through each other.

By the end of whatever you were watching Felix normally had his hands down your pants and his lips pressing scorching kisses into your neck and sometimes you didn’t even make it to the end of what you were watching.

Your roommate was over at Hyunjin’s dorm having a study night for their shared classes, so you took the opportunity of an empty dorm to hold your usual hangout with Felix.

Tonight, felt oddly different. Felix had his arms wrapped around you protectively, one of his hands was caressing the back of your head and was gently stroking your hair. Occasionally he would press a light kiss into your hair, normally when you let out a giggle at something on the screen or when you hummed in content- a reaction to how fuzzy his hand in your hair was making you feel.

You had your arms wrapped around his waist and you were clinging to his side, fingers toying with the band of his black sweatpants, but you had no desire to pull them off, rather you found comfort in moving your fingertips to graze over the skin of his hip, earning another light kiss from Felix every time you did.

“Are you still going to the party tomorrow night?” Felix asked out of the blue as the episode came to an end, displaying the next episode beginning in ten seconds’ screen.

“Yeah, it’ll be good to see everyone, I haven’t seen a lot of the gang in forever.” You exclaimed pulling your head back from his chest to look up at him as you spoke.

“Let me know if it gets too much, I don’t mind coming back here with you and hanging.” Felix informed you, his hand that was stroking your hair moving down to trail his thumb from your temple to your lips.

His finger was surprisingly soft as he traced your bottom lip staring intently at his finger gliding across it.

“You don’t have to leave the party just because of me.” You stated looking up at him with doe eyes, “It’s not your job to make sure I’m comfortable in social settings.”

Felix’s features contorted momentarily, and his thumb’s movement stilled at your words and then dropped from your face to land on your hip.

“Yeah. I guess.” Felix mumbled looking back to the projector screen on the wall of your bedroom as the next episode begun.

Your gaze lingered on Felix. You weren’t oblivious and no matter how much you tried to convince yourself it wasn’t the case; things were shifting in your arrangement. Normally by now Felix would have made a move to initiate what your arrangement was for, but he hadn’t so much as groped you or even at the bare minimum looked at you with lusting eyes.

Was Felix regretting crossing the line from friends to friends with benefits? Had he wished you’d remained just friends? Did he not want to have sex with you anymore?

There was only one way to find out.

You moved your hand down to Felix’s arm that was resting over your stomach- the arm of the hand on your hip and began delicately dragging your fingertips up and down his arm causing goosebumps to appear.

You heard Felix suck in a sharp breath as he became aware of your actions, however his eyes remained trained on the projector screen ahead of you watching the new episode that had begun to play.

When you failed to get Felix’s attention, you let your fingertips glide up his arm, trailing over the bumps of his muscles and veins all the way up to his neck where you drew circles eliciting deep breaths from Felix as he tried his hardest to keep his eyes on the projector.

You narrowed your eyes at him. Why was he trying to resist you? He knew he didn’t have to hold himself back, that on nights like these you were at his beck and call- to have you whenever he wanted. All he had to do was respond or initiate it and you were his.

You leaned up to his ear, ghosting your lips over his cheek before whispering in the most seductive tone you could muster, “I want you, Felix.”

As soon as your words left your lips, Felix sprung up out of your bed and away from your touch like you had just shocked him with an electric current.

“…Y/N…I…” Felix stammered looking around the room but refusing to make eye contact with you as he tried to find the words he wanted to say.

His cheeks were brightly flushed, and now that he was standing in front of you, you could see the strain in his pants where his erection was pleading to be freed. If he wanted you, why was he resisting you?

Your curiosity was gnawing at you, begging you to find out why Felix was acting so differently from how he normally acted. You hated making Felix uncomfortable and you didn’t want to make the situation any worse, but you desperately needed to know what the hell was going on with him.

“Okay, what the hell is going on Felix?” You asked genuinely concerned over his behaviour.

He had been so physically affectionate with you at the start of this week, even going as far to publicly defend you when Yunseo had argued with you and yet now, he was jumping away from you the moment you tried to be intimate. None of it made sense.

“Nothing is going on.” He quickly breathed out, walking over to your dressing cabinet and putting away your folded laundry like it was something that needed to be done in this exact moment.

Your eyes followed him around the room as he moved, “Bullshit, what have I done?” You demanded refusing to believe that nothing was bothering him.

Felix quickly turned himself back to face you, waving his hand dismissively to your remarks, “No, no! You haven’t done anything!” He hurriedly clarified as if the thought of you thinking you had done something wrong was absurd.

You didn’t believe him that you hadn’t done anything, why else would he be acting this way, but you also didn’t want to press him if he wasn’t ready to talk about it.

Felix could tell you didn’t believe what he said, so he let out a breath he didn’t realise he was holding and came back to sit next to you, taking your hand in his, holding onto it ever so gently and rubbing his thumb over the back of your hand soothingly.

“It’s not that I don’t want you, I always want you.” Felix tried to explain still refusing to meet your eyes, “But I also really enjoy just being your friend and hanging out with you.”

There it was all your fears were answered and it was just as you had expected. He was having second thoughts about your arrangement. You felt your stomach fall.

You pulled your hand slowly out of Felix’s touch, suddenly feeling like it no longer belonged in his hand and Felix finally looked at you to see hurt and disappointment on your face.

“Only sometimes.” He tried to further explain, “And this isn’t me calling off our arrangement!” He was searching desperately for the right words as he watched you recoil from his side uncomfortably.

“Then what are you doing? I don’t understand.” You asked bringing your knees up to your chest resting your back on the headboard, so you were physically the farthest away from Felix on the bed.

“I’m saying, I know our rule is only sex, but sometimes I just want to hold you and drift off to sleep or shower you in affection that isn’t sexual.” Felix tried his hardest to make you understand what he was saying, and you finally understood what he meant.

Was Felix that afraid of commitment? He knows what this means surely? He was asking for more out of your arrangement, something that would blur the lines more than they had already been.

“Friends don’t do that sort of stuff Felix.” You muttered over your arms where your chin rested on them above your knees.

“We aren’t just friends though darling; we are friends with benefits. I’m just asking for more benefits.” Felix suggested crawling on the bed to sit right in front of you, giving you nowhere to run.

You looked into his eyes, and you could see the sincerity there, he really wanted you to agree with this, but you weren’t completely satisfied with these upgrades to your arrangement. Felix was basically asking you to do things that a girlfriend would do, without the title girlfriend, without the reassurance a girlfriend has and without the devotion of love.

It was a huge thing for him to ask of you, especially when he knew how adamant you were at the start of your arrangement with this only being about sex. You didn’t want one of you to get hurt, but here you were hurting, because you had just realised you wanted to be Lee Felix’s girlfriend and he just wanted to be your friend with benefits.

You looked away from him as you felt your heart twist upon the realisation of your feelings and blinked away the tears that were beginning to prick behind your eyes.

Felix noticed your shift in demeanour, he always did and placed his hands softly onto the outer parts of your shoulder’s rubbing soothingly like he had done earlier with his thumb on your hand.

“Hey, look at me, darling.” One of his hands left your shoulder to gently tilt your chin in his direction, making you look into his eyes once more. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.” Felix apologised and you shook your head, he didn’t need to apologise for his lack of feelings.

“No, it’s okay, I’m okay.” You tried to reassure him by opening your posture to him and letting your knees and arms fall from their closed off stance. You reached out wrapping your hands around the back of his neck and you shifted yourself from your sitting position to climb into his lap and straddle him.

Felix’s hands instinctively fell to your waist holding you against him and he pressed a kiss into your cheek hesitantly like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to do so anymore.

“We can do that, if that’s what you want.” You finally said voice light and Felix seemed unhappy with your answer.

His hands left your hips and moved upward to cup your face delicately in his hands, so you were forced again to look into his eyes.

“I only want it, if it’s something you want to do.” He said honestly and this time you believed what he told you, “If you want this to just be sex, then we can do that. I just thought that sometimes when one of us isn’t feeling up to it, we can still hang out and be around each other, because the truth is I love spending time with you and just chatting with you.”

You didn’t know how to talk to him about your concerns, about how if you hung out together like you had the other night then you weren’t just friends with benefits and you weren’t just friends either, doing those things meant something to you.

It wasn’t just somebody kissing you or holding you because it felt nice. It was Felix kissing you and holding you and it made you feel something. You no longer wanted to be just his friend or just his friends with benefits, when the benefits were more intimate than just casual sex.

Regardless of what he said about wanting what you wanted, you knew he didn’t have the feelings that you had, and you could see in his eyes he really did want to be able to cuddle you and hang with you even if no sex was involved. You could never say no to him and secretly despite your concerns about getting hurt more than you were already starting to, it also excited you to know you’d be able to spend even more time with Felix.

You leaned into his touch and gently slotted your lips against his, feeling his lips morph into a smile as he kissed you back, using his hands on your cheeks to deepen the kiss and take control of it.

He kissed you so slowly and passionately that you were taken by surprise, almost letting a gasp escape your lips. Felix kissed you as if he was trying to show you how happy it would make him for you to agree to his suggestion and how grateful he would be as a result.

You felt Felix’s tongue glide over where your lips met, but before he could deepen the kiss further you pulled away to look at him. His lips were puffy and swollen from the kiss and his eyes scanned your face trying to decipher your feelings, but you made sure to mask them and appear happy about your new arrangement which you were just about to agree too.

“I want to make sure I have this right.” You spoke up shuffling slightly, so you were sat fully in his lap, ignoring the half hard erection underneath you that you were now sitting on. “You want us to extend our friends with benefits, so that the only benefit isn’t just sex, but also hanging out cuddling and sleeping over?”

Felix nodded and bit the bottom of his lip nervously as he patiently waited for your answer.

You sucked in a deep breath, knowing full well this was only going to hurt you more in the long run, but your fear of Felix finding someone else he could do everything he wanted with, who didn’t care about titles or commitment scared you more than getting hurt did.

“We might need to update our rules then.” You stated with a nervous giggle.

Felix’s deep-toned chuckle caused his body to vibrate under your touch and he looked at you fondly.

“I barely even remember our rules to be honest, I’ve just been going with the flow.” Felix laughed moving his hands back down to your waist and resting them there comfortably.

“Let’s make them easier to remember this time.” You laughed along with him before stating your new rules, “No catching feelings, no sleeping with other people, keep it out of the classroom and only do what we are both comfortable with.”

Felix thought over the rules you had listed, and you almost thought he was going to disagree with you, but he slowly nodded and muttered out a “sounds good to me” before he pulled you into a tight comforting hug.

You melted into his hold and closed your eyes. You didn’t know how you were going to ignore the feelings starting to wrap themselves around your heart, but you were willing to try if that meant keeping Felix and the situationship you had built.

You blinked away the sleep from your eyes and let out a curse as you were met with the blinding flash of sunlight peeking through your bedroom blinds.

You had spent the rest of your Friday night finishing the season of the k-drama Felix and you had started, while cuddling into each other and drifting to sleep in a similar position.

Felix was still sound asleep next to you, your legs tangled up with his and his hand was outstretched towards you, as if he was trying to reach for you in his sleep.

You held back a coo that rose in your throat at the peaceful and adorable pouty face, sleeping Felix was making.

Once you had agreed to being intimate in other ways when sex wasn’t needed, Felix had attached himself to you, even following you into the kitchen to stay near you when you cooked the two of you dinner.

You definitely didn’t hate having Felix with you constantly, in fact you enjoyed it more than you should, but having him around and being so loving toward you, didn’t help your overpowering feelings for him.

You watched, captivated by the slow rise and fall of his chest and the soft whimpers that filtered out from between his pillowy lips.

His nose scrunched up as a strand of his silvery blonde hair tickled the tip of his nose and you reached out to move it out of his face affectionately.

Felix shuffled in his sleep and inched closer to you on the bed, still reaching out in your direction like his sleeping form could sense you there.

It startled you when you heard a faint slurry “Y/N” come from a sleepy Felix and his eyes were now half opened looking at you and still reaching for you.

You reached out in return, capturing his hand in yours and tucked him under the blankets more. He responded by nuzzling into the sheets and your pillow, his eyes fluttering closed once more, and it was hard to tell if he had even properly woken up when he called your name.

“Shh, sleep Lix.” You cooed letting go of his hand tucking it underneath the sheet with the rest of him and leaving a loving kiss to his forehead.

Felix hummed sleepily and once you heard his slow deep breaths return, you carefully removed yourself from the bed, convinced Felix had drifted back to sleep.

You walked into your bathroom, turning the tap on at your sink and begun splashing cool water into your face, trying to wake yourself up further.

Staring at your reflection you wondered how you had gotten yourself here. You were falling for your fuck buddy, you were breaking rule number one and there was nothing you could do about your feelings, beside ignore them and suppress them.

How successful could you really be with ignoring them or suppressing them? You had just spent another night with Felix doing everything intimate besides the one thing you originally agreed on, sex.

You needed to clear your head and focus on something else.

You decided that you hadn’t gone for a morning run in a long time and you hoped that the cool fresh morning air would bring some clarity on what to do in your situation.

Slipping quietly back into your bedroom, you grabbed your exercise leggings, a tank top and your sports bra and tip toed back out into the bathroom to get changed, managing not to disturb the sleeping boy in your bed.

Once you had gotten changed, you threw your hair up into a tight ponytail and went into the living room to put on your socks and your sneakers that were left by the front door.

You jogged your way out of your dorm complex and begun a slow run in the direction of the campus park.

The campus park was beautiful.

The centre of the park was a large, beautiful lake, that was home for ducks, lake fish and sometimes you were lucky enough to see the occasional swan. There was a bridge that went from the east side to the west side of the lake in case you were merely just passing through and needing a faster route, but the campus park wasn’t somewhere you hurried through. 

The lake was surrounded by grassed areas, gardens full of blooming flowers, park benches and even off to the south side was a gazebo, which was famous for on campus proposals of the young and in love.

The campus park otherwise known as Lake Tranquil, was exactly that. Peaceful, breath taking and relaxing. It was the go-to place for majority of students to study and was just genuinely loved by all.

Art majors loved to come here for painting, photography and sketching. Music majors came for inspiration for songs or tracks. Hell, you had even seen some of the law students down here basking in the sunlight by the lake, shaking the stress away from mid-semester exams.

You often came to Lake Tranquil on your runs, as well as most of the students on campus.

Breathing in the fresh lake scented air, standing on the middle of the bridge to appreciate the scenery and picking a flower to put by your bed side- which was definitely not allowed, but no one ever stopped you- were some of your favourite things to do when you passed through.

Suddenly you felt yourself crash into a hard moving object and you clattered to the grass covered ground below you with a yelp. You ripped your ear buds from your ears to hear what the person above you was saying.

“Oh my god! Y/N, are you okay?” Minho’s startled voice asked confirming he was what you had run into.

You looked up at him cupping your hand over your forehead to block away the sun denying your vision. Minho stood bent at the waist, holding a hand outward to you in an offer of helping you back to your feet and a concerned look apparent on his features.

You let out an awkward laugh, embarrassed that you weren’t paying attention to your surroundings and had run straight into one of your and Felix’s close friends.

You placed your hand in his and let him pull you back onto your feet.

“Sorry about that Min! Yeah, I’m okay, you didn’t get hurt, did you?” You asked while brushing off the combination of dirt and grass that had attached to the fabric of your leggings.

Minho shook his head in response to your question and then raised an eyebrow at you, “Where have you been hiding, it’s been far too long since I’ve seen you!” Minho questioned you.

He was observing your face intricately with a smug expression on his features, like he secretly knew what had been keeping you away from the friend group, but wanted to hear you admit it.

“Classes, assignments, homework…you know the usual.” You shrugged avoiding mentioning the main distraction from your friends.

Minho breathed out a chuckle and then bit his lip, like he was trying to physically hold himself back from speaking out what he wanted, but he did it anyway, “Not some guy around this tall, blondish silver hair, ‘I don’t care for relationships, but I’m a simp for Y/N’ type of attitude and conveniently also been missing from the friend group, distracting you from hanging with your friends?”

Minho held his hand up to just below his own height going along with the bit, his smug expression not faltering for a second as your cheeks burned with embarrassment.

You weren’t embarrassed by your arrangement with Felix, you weren’t even embarrassed by Minho talking about you and Felix spending too much time with each other. You were embarrassed by the fact that Minho knew the effect Felix had on you, that you would discard everything just to spend time with Felix.

If he had noticed it, who else had?

“Well…yes I’ve been spending a bit more time with Felix, but that has nothing to do with the friend group, you know I love you guys!” You instinctively defended yourself crossing your arms across your chest in a defensive position and shifted uncomfortably under Minho’s teasing gaze.

“Hmm, if you say so.” Minho hummed in disagreement, “You going to the party tonight?” He asked changing the conversation at the awareness of your sudden demeanour shift.

You relaxed a little at the topic change, “Yeah, Lix invited me earlier in the week, you?”

“Yeah, heading over early to help the boys set up and by boys, I mean Chan because we all know the other two aren’t helping.” Minho chuckled before reaching into his pocket to pull out his phone, checking the notification he had just received. “I got to go, but put some time aside tonight for your friend group, yeah?”

You felt your cheeks-which had only just started losing their rosy-red colour- heat back up again at Minho’s reference to you spending too much time with Felix.

“Yeah, of course!” You responded as he threw a wave over his shoulder, already jogging away from you in the direction he was going before he bumped into you.

You watched Minho jog away into the distance and you couldn’t help a feeling of helplessness wash over you. Minho was always the type of person to speak in secret references or have a deeper meaning hidden amongst his words. Was he trying to tell you, that your feelings for Felix were obvious and if you weren’t ready to reveal them, you needed to do a better job at hiding them?

Did Felix know how you felt and that’s why he stopped wanting to have sex with you? Scared you’d take more out of the act than agreed upon?

You shook your head, expelling yourself from your spiralling thoughts and pushed your earbuds back into your ears, turning up the volume as loud as you could handle and began running again.

You ended up running around the entirety of Lake Tranquil, before you found yourself back in front of your dorm door, typing in the code and entering.

You could hear the distant sound of running water coming from the direction of your bathroom and your roommate’s bedroom door was wide open, with no trace of her return to the dorm, indicating it was still only you and Felix in the dorm.

As you approached the bathroom, you thought over what you were about to do and if it was a good idea or not.

You had showered with Felix plenty of times before, always starting out innocent, but eventually steaming up into some of the best sex you’d ever had as the water cascaded down both of your conjoined figures.

You knew that if you entered the shower with Felix, he would know what it means, but you were sweaty from your run and you were intrigued to find out if he would continue to try and resist you, even in a situation where you both knew sex was inevitable.

You entered the bathroom slowly, making sure not to be too obvious, wanting to sneak in with him. Felix’s figure could be seen through the fogged-up shower glass, standing under the water current with his back to you.

You hurriedly discarded your clothes, eyes not leaving Felix’s body as he began washing his hair and you moved forward to the shower glass.

As if he suddenly sensed your presence Felix turned around, your eyes meeting. His eyes were widened slightly in surprise, but as soon as they widened, they shifted and relaxed with desire filling over his brown orbs as he scanned his eyes down your completely naked figure.

“Good morning, Darling.” He breathed out emphasising on the good while the water slashed harshly at the back of his neck from his stilled position under the stream.

“Morning, Handsome.” You quipped back, sliding open the glass shower door and stepping into the shower in front of Felix.

His hands instantly reached for you, finding their home on your waist and pulling you flush into him as he attached his lips to yours in a heated kiss.

You moaned unexpectedly into his lips which caused a groan to slip out of his own lips as he took your bottom lip in between his teeth biting down gently but hungrily.

You wrapped your hands around to his back where you let your fingernails glide from the tops of his shoulder blades downward, leaving searing red marks in their trail that sent shivers down Felix’s spine.

Felix threw his head back with a gasp disconnecting your lips, an expression of pure ecstasy passing across his features. You smiled triumphantly as you felt his erection hard and big leaning up against where you were pressed into him.

His hands on your waist tightened as he gripped you firmly, pulling you forward and spinning you around until your back hit the shower wall with a soft thud.

As soon as your back hit the wall, Felix was all over you. It was like you had snapped a switch within him as his lips pressed over your collarbone, up your neck and around your earlobes, nibbling into the skin there leaving marks you know wouldn’t be able to be covered by makeup.

His hands travelled painfully slow up from your hips, tracing his fingertips delicately on the skin of your naked sides causing your heart to accelerate, and your breaths to come out as pants that formed into breathy moans.

Your hands moved to hold his biceps trying to ground yourself while the only emotion you could sense was want and desire for Felix, becoming overwhelming as you extended your neck back against the wall, giving Felix more access to it.

“I want you so bad.” Felix groaned, thrusting his hips against you and pushing himself further into your skin, if that was even possible.

His cock was red and angry pressed up against your lower stomach, trapped in between your two bodies. You didn’t need him to tell you that, you could sense in every essence of his being that he wanted you and you wanted him just as badly.

“I’m yours.” You moaned back at him in response, rolling your hips forward against him chasing any type of friction.

Your words seemed to trigger something in Felix as he froze marking your neck and focused on slowing his breathing down.

Felix pulled himself slowly away from you, clearly trying to relax himself as he put some distance between you.

As you looked over his panicked expression, you realised what you had just said. You idiot. It’s not like you hadn’t said the sentence before, but with Felix displaying commitment issues as of late, your choice of words was a huge mistake.

“Felix…I” You swallowed trying to slow your own heart beat down as you moved forward, your hand reaching out for his arm, trying to pull him from his head that he had disappeared into.

The second your hand touched Felix’s arm he retracted from your space and hurried out of the shower, grabbing his towel and making quick efforts to dry himself as quickly as possible.

“I forgot I had to help Chan with something before the party today, I’ve got to go.” Felix spoke almost emotionlessly as he dried himself off and began throwing his clothes on.

You stood stunned in place, fallen against the wall, your head hung low too ashamed to look up at him. You felt dirty, stupid and vulnerable.

Just like the last time you were in the shower with the departure of Felix, you felt the water grow cold and the slight breeze of the room was harshly reminding you of reality setting in.

Before Felix exited the bathroom, he glanced over at your slumped saddened self and frowned. He moved back over to the shower and reached a hand through the stream, avoiding the water getting on his clothes to pick up your hand in his.

He pulled you forward under the stream completely and through it to the other side, where you came face to face with him.

“I’m sorry, I’ll see you later, okay?” His voice was soft now, a hint of sadness to it and concern.

You couldn’t find your voice, so you opted a simple nod, eyes still refusing to leave the tiled floor of the shower.

You felt him squeeze your hand in his and his lips pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, before he removed himself from your space once more and exited the bathroom without another word.

You crumpled to the tiled floor and let your head hide away into your hands, knees drawn to your chest, and you let out the tears and sobs you had held back while Felix was still here.

All your fears from your run earlier had just been answered.

You were in love with Felix, Felix knew how you felt, but he didn’t love you back.

The rest of the day leading up to the 3Racha dorm party you spent moping around your dorm. Your roommate had arrived back around lunch time, saying they’d crashed at Hyunjin’s overnight and were in need of doing more study for other units before the party tonight.

You had tried to distract yourself with study at some point during the day, but your thoughts would soon spiral into the recent memories with Felix and the feeling of regret and embarrassment would fill you with dread not long after.

There were only a few hours left until the party and you were currently dissociated, staring at the wall of your bedroom.

You were contemplating whether even still going tonight would be a good thing. If you went, there was no way you could escape Felix, you would have to see him eventually and that could make everything worse, but then at the same time, Minho had mentioned your lack of engagement within the friend group and he wasn’t wrong, you had barely spent any time with them in the last month.

If only you hadn’t been so foolish this morning.

Letting out a long-drawn-out sigh you let your body fall to the side in defeat on top of your bed, curling into the fetal position and hiding your head in your hands ashamed.

You felt your phone vibrate from next to you, bringing you out of your sullen emotions and you reached one arm out to feel around the sheets for your phone.

Once in your grasp you held the phone up to eye level and to your surprise you had a few text messages from Felix.

The text messages only confused your feelings more. What was Felix playing at, one minute he’s jumping away from you at the slightest mention of you being his and now he can’t wait to see you tonight?

You groaned throwing your phone to the side and burying your head into your blankets.

As much as you wanted to wrap your blankets around you and spend the night wallowing in self-pity, you couldn’t, you had promised Minho, your roommate and now Felix that you would make it tonight.

Across the hallway into your roommate’s room, you could hear her blow-dryer going, indicating she was finished with her study and getting ready for the party.

You looked down at your comfy home clothes and let out a sigh, dragging yourself out of the welcoming embrace of your bed sheets and began looking through your closet for something to wear.

You opted for a black mini skirt that flared out slightly around your thighs, giving you easy movement if you decided to join the dance floor with some tight black safety shorts underneath just in case. You paired the skirt with an off the shoulder blood red crop top, that flowed with a frill around the top of the shirt and shoulder’s where it draped down, as well as black converse shoes, a wide clunky belt that hugged your waist in the right places and various jewellery to pull the outfit together.  

You left your hair out, letting it flow down your back, but still combed it through styling it to how you preferred.

As you were finishing off your makeup, you phone pinged from next to you, signalling you had another string of incoming texts. Some from Minho demanding you actually show yourself tonight and a few more from Felix asking if you were there and then asking when you were arriving.

You saw the time was 8:04pm and you cursed that you had taken longer to get ready than you had thought.

You raced around your room, grabbing your things and then headed toward your roommate’s room to tell her to hurry up.

You poked your head around the corner and saw your room mate sitting at her dressing table, smiling widely down at her phone as she typed a text message back, to who you could only assume was her best friend Jeongin.

They were inseparable from the moment Hyunjin introduced the two of them and you were grateful to have someone so caring to call your roommate.

You weren’t the closest of roommates, she hadn’t been living with you for too long, but you wouldn’t want anyone else as your roommate.

Everyone could see the looks your roommate and Jeongin shared, and no one believed them when they said they were just friends, this was a prime example of it.

Your roommate turned her head noticing you standing in her doorway and you gave her a friendly affectionate smile.

“You ready to go? Felix is wondering where we are.” You rolled your eyes playfully in a teasing manner.

“Let me just brush my teeth, then I’ll be good to go.” She smiled at you while tying her shoelaces.

You thought over the recent events with Felix, the mixed signals he had been displaying and your overwhelming sense of confusion to who you were to Felix at all. Your roommate was closer with the friend group, due to her hanging around them more and having a deeper connection with more of the members of the group.

Although she wasn’t super close with Felix, it wouldn’t hurt asking her opinion of Felix as you had never bothered to ask before.

“You are friends with the boys more than I am,” You stated entering her room and leaning against the wall next to the door frame, “What do you think of Felix?” you continued and asked in a serious tone.

Your roommate stopped tying her shoelaces and sat up to look at you, seemingly confused, “I would assume you know Felix better than I do?”

You blushed at her words and let out a nervous laugh, “In some ways I guess, but would you say he’s a good person?”

She arched an eyebrow at you, “Yeah? Why? Has something happened between you guys?” She asked appearing like she was lost on what this conversation even meant.

“No! No, nothing than the usual…well…never mind it’s not important.” You suddenly felt like talking about your feelings wasn’t a good idea.

“Look, I don’t know the full extent on what is going on with you two, but you seem to both really enjoy what you have. Felix is a great guy, you’re a great girl. Live in the moment and try not to overthink so much. Overthinking only leads to bad things.” She advised you, standing up from her dressing table and straightening her outfit.

You pondered over her words and then mentally tried to shake the worry out of you.

Your roommate was right. You might have feelings for Felix, but until Felix was willing to have that conversation- and even if he did the result could be terrible- there wasn’t anything you could do.

You just had to live in the moment and be happy that you got to be with Felix in whatever capacity you could.

“You’re right. Brush your teeth and let’s go, I need a drink desperately.” You laughed pushing yourself off the wall behind you and exiting your roommate’s room to wait for her in the living room.

By the time you and your room mate rocked up to the infamous 3Racha dorm, music was blearing loudly, people were scattered absolutely everywhere, and party lights were shining brightly out the front door and any cracks of windows that weren’t covered by curtains.

The living room had been cleared to make a makeshift dance floor and the open plan kitchen counter was turned into a DJ set up, where Chan was perched proudly mixing for the small crowd dancing. His girlfriend was beside him drinking and talking to who you knew was her roommate. The entry way to the back patio had a group of people playing drinking games in a circle on the floor and the back glass double doors were fully open to reveal a beer pong table assembled and a group playing.

You passed Minho and Changbin on your way through the doorway into the living room and Changbin threw his arm around your roommate dragging her away from you and into their conversation.

Minho perked up upon seeing your arrival to the party, happy that you had decided to keep to your promise, and you sent him a wink.

“I’ll see you later, I’m gonna go find Felix!” You shouted over the music to the group of three to which your roommate nodded with a smile.

You left the three of your friends and decided to check outside first, as you had scanned the first floor on entry and couldn’t see Felix anywhere nearby.

Passing the group playing beer pong, you walked further outside. There were significantly less people out here, being too early in the night for people to require air or needing to spread out and relax.

There was a group of smokers sitting around an unlit campfire and you noticed the unmistakeable silvery blonde hair of Felix bobbing as he laughed at something one of the male smokers said to him.

You couldn’t control the smile that forced itself onto your face as you watched his smile crinkle the skin around his eyes, turning them into little crescent moons that outshone the moon that hung in the sky above you.

As if Felix sensed your arrival, his eyes drifted from the man in front of him to look at you standing on the patio near the beer pong table.

His mouth gaped slightly as his eyes raked down your body and then back up to meet your eyes again. He seemed mesmerised just by the sight of you.

Ignoring the man that was still talking to him, Felix stood to his feet and begun walking over to where you were standing on the patio, not breaking eye contact while he did.

“Darling, you look incredible.” He breathed out, not wasting a moment to bring you into his embrace for a longer hug than a typical friendly hug. It wouldn’t be a Felix hug, if he didn’t snuggle his face into your neck and breath in your scent, sending the familiar shiver down your spine that you could somehow never get use to.

You giggled nervously at the compliment, suddenly feeling lightheaded now that he had his arms around you again, even though you had only been in them this morning.

Felix was seeming to ignore what happened this morning and you didn’t want to make things awkward or make the situation worse, so you decided to do the same.

“What no cigarette? Are you feeling okay?” You joked pulling away just enough to give him your trademark smirk.

His eyes lit up at the fact you were willing to look past this morning and he gave your hips a squeeze in a silent agreement to move on and have a good night.

“I knew I was seeing you and thought I’d better hold off.” Felix smiled at you, finally pulling away from you to turn you away from the smoker’s area, slinging one of his arms over your shoulders and he begun guiding you back inside the party.

“It’s never stopped me from kissing you before, you know that right?” You said honestly falling into step beside Felix.

Before Felix could respond, you both were stopped in place by Jisung, Changbin and Minho who had blocked your path at the double doors to inside.

“And where do you think you two are going?” Changbin questioned putting his hands on his hips and furrowing his eyebrows in a serious stance like he was an angry mother whose child had just returned home late past curfew.

“To get drinks, didn’t know it was a crime, father.” Felix quick witted, pulling you into his side tighter as if the presence of your three friends was somehow a threat.

Changbin scoffed in annoyance at the insinuation he was treating Felix like a kid, but his features gave him away that he found this whole situation amusing.

“We have perfectly good drinks for you right here though.” Minho stated extending one of his arms to gesture to the beer pong table that was now cleared of the group that was originally playing on it when you arrived.

“Tempting, but the maths isn’t mathing and it appears we have one too many.” Felix responded going to step around the three boys, attempting to pull you with him, but Jisung linked arms with you and effectively ripped you from Felix’s grasp.

“Not fair! You’ve spent so much time with Y/N the last few weeks, learn how to share!” Jisung complained wrapping his arms around you from your right side and holding you firmly so you could not escape.

Felix was no longer willing to joke around. His jaw had set in place, his cheeks were flushed with red like he had eaten too much spice and he seemed almost ready to explode with anger as his eyes looked at you in Jisung’s arms.

“Stop fighting over her like she’s a toy.” Minho lectured, scolding Jisung with a slap to the back of his head which got Jisung’s arms to fall away from you. “Have you even bothered to ask what Y/N wants to do?”

Minho turned his attention to you with a raised eyebrow.

You could choose to go inside with Felix, get drinks, maybe talk about this morning or dance a little, but Minho’s voice from early in the morning rang through your mind.

‘Put some time aside tonight for your friend group.’

“I am feeling a bit competitive, can you spare me for just one game?” You directed your question to Felix with a pout and matching puppy eyes, trying to soften the blow of you choosing to hang with your friend group over spending time with him.

Even though Felix was annoyed, his eyes softened at your pleading expression, and he let out a sigh.

“Of course, come find me when you’re done, okay?” Felix responded leaning over to press a haste kiss to your cheek after you gave him a nod.

“You aren’t going to stay and watch Jisung and I, kick their butts?” Changbin asked shagging up Jisung’s hair affectionately, earning a groan from the younger boy.

Felix shook his head and bit his lip, still tense from Jisung’s actions with you, “Nah, I’m gonna grab a drink, chat to Chan and maybe have a smoke.”

“Your loss, something tells me this will be over pretty quick though.” Changbin shrugged sending a wink to Minho playfully.

Minho clicked his tongue to the roof of his mouth in disagreement and playfully shoved Changbin away by a hand to his chest.

“Put your money where your mouth is, I bet $150 that Y/N and I stomp you both.” Minho bet moving over to the beer pong table to set up.

One game of beer pong turned into two as a result of Jisung and Changbin’s peer pressure and you were beginning to feel the effects of losing the first game and barely winning the second.

Felix hadn’t resurfaced, so after your second game finished you decided to head back inside the party before you could be talked into another round.

If you thought the party was well under way when you arrived, it was nothing compared to now. Either that or it was the fresh buzzing alcohol in your system.

The music seemed loud enough now that it was thumping in your chest, the small dance floor in front of the kitchen bench where Chan had left his playlist to run through was now covered with people dancing – more like grinding on each other to the beat, and getting around the dorm house was seemingly more difficult than before.

You were scanning the faces of people pushing past you and of anyone you could glance at, but none held the face of the man you were looking for.

Suddenly you felt someone’s hand wrap around your wrist, and you were tugged by someone near the bottom of the staircase out of the crowd you were in.

You stumbled a little on your feet and their hand on your wrist moved to your waist to stabilise you.

“Shit, sorry!” Seungmin apologised ensuring you were stable on your feet before he stood back from you giving your space back to you.

“Hey.” You giggled feeling a lightheaded from being jostled around and the alcohol, “Is everything alright?” You asked once you had composed yourself.

“Can we talk upstairs for a minute? Some stuff just happened.” Seungmin asked you, looking disappointed.

You weren’t as close with Seungmin like you were with some of the others in the group, so you had a feeling it might have something to do with your room mate and your face fell at the thought that something might have happened to her, especially if Seungmin wanted to talk with you.

“Of course, lets go.” You nodded taking the lead and walking up the stairs next to you with Seungmin following behind you.

Upstairs was almost like a different world to the party in full swing downstairs. There were only a few people hanging in the hallway, the bathroom was occupied, but with only a short line of people waiting, and the boys’ bedroom doors were all shut and locked indicating no more people were upstairs.

Seungmin took over the lead slipping past you and walked over to stand in front of the study turned music room door that was shut, but since it was at the end of the hallway, it gave you two a little privacy from the people waiting to use the bathroom.

“Sorry to pull you away, but I thought you should know about a situation that just unfolded.” Seungmin sighed running a hand through his hair in a distressed manner.

“What’s going on Seungmin, what’s this about?” You asked impatiently wanting to know if your roommate was okay, or what Seungmin could possibly be this worried about.

“Your roommate and Jeongin. I think they finally realised they both have feelings for each other. I knew Jeongin had been crushing on her for a while and I had my suspicions she felt the same way, but tonight it’s been made pretty clear it’s mutual.” Seungmin explained leaning his back against the wall like he needed the support to stand.

You let yourself fall back into the wall next to him and let out a ‘woah’ at the information just given to you.

“What happened tonight?” You questioned curiously while thinking through all the signs you’d seen from your roommate that she liked Jeongin.

“They were dancing, or should I call it for what it really was, basically dry humping. They looked like they were about to kiss, I was getting ready to track down Jisung and demand my winnings, but ‘cutie’ just panicked and ran out of the house. Don’t worry though, Hyunjin saw everything, and he’s gone to make sure she’s okay.” Seungmin explained further putting an emphasis on the nickname Jeongin always used in reference to your roommate- you’d even picked up the habit of calling her that every now and again.

 “I mean, can’t say I’m surprised. I had my suspicions as well; they’ve never really acted like only just friends. Friends don’t look at each other like that.” You agreed pondering over the information just given to you and relaxing more against the wall knowing that your roommate had her other best friend to make sure she got home safe.

“Like how you and Felix look at each other?” Seungmin broke the seriousness of the conversation to smirk over at you.

You felt an uncontrollable blush creep across your cheeks. Was it seriously this obvious of your feelings for Felix?

“We’re different and I don’t need to remind you how…” You trailed off rolling your eyes at him trying to distract Seungmin from noticing the flush in your cheeks. You’d blame it on the alcohol even if he did.

“Oh yeah, totally different.” Seungmin said sarcastically as he held back a laugh crossing his arms across his chest and pushing himself off the wall, ready to head back down to the party. “Anyway, I just wanted to fill you in, in case you need to be there for her tonight.”

“Thanks, Seungmin and thank you for always looking out for Jeongin and cutie, it doesn’t go un noticed. You’re a great friend.” You expressed your gratefulness for Seungmin with a soft smile on your face and all the sincerity in your tone to back it up.

Seungmin’s iconic puppy grin took over his features at your words and he beamed with pride. He reached out pulling you into his chest for a brief hug in gratitude for your kind words.

“Y/N!” You all of a sudden heard Felix’s voice boom from the direction of the top of the stairs and you pulled away to see a very annoyed looking Felix marching toward the two of you.

From the way Felix had called over to you, the people waiting by the bathroom’s attention was now on the three of you, curious to see what was going on.

“I’ll catch you later Y/N.” Seungmin excused himself, leaving your side and heading past Felix.

“Sup Lix.” Seungmin greeted Felix as he walked over to him, but Felix just pushed passed him making a b line toward you and muttered a ‘we’ll chat later’ at a confused and stunned Seungmin.

“Hey Lixie, sorry I was coming inside to find-what’re you doing??” You tried to address Felix and explain your detour situation, but Felix just wrapped your wrist like Seungmin had previously done, but Felix had a much stronger grip on your wrist.

Felix tugged you toward Jisung’s door and to your surprise, swung open Jisung’s bedroom door and pulled you into it before slamming it shut behind you.

Before you could even question how Felix knew Jisung’s door was unlocked, Felix pushed you up against Jisung’s closed door and pressed himself flush against you, dipping his head so his face was directly in front of yours.

“What were you and Seungmin doing up here?” Felix questioned you, searching your eyes, prepared to detect any sense of nervousness or deceit.

“He wanted to tell me about Jeongin and my roommate, some stuff happened- wait, why is that important? What’s going on with you?” You demanded furrowing your eyebrows at his strange behaviour.

Felix’s hands left the position on your waist to trap you against the door, by placing one hand on either side of your head on the door like your defiance to his interrogation was a sign you were going to try and leave.

“Why’d he leave when I showed up then?” Felix continued his line of questioning, bringing his face closer to yours, grazing his nose against your cheek and jawline sending tingles wherever it traced.

“To give us a chance to talk? I don’t know, I’m not a mind reader Felix.” You were losing your patience now, Felix was coming across as jealous, which was making no sense to you in the slightest from his behaviour this morning to now.

Felix pulled away from your face to look at you taken a back by your sudden annoyance with him.

“I’m just asking. Why are you so defensive?” He scoffed taking a step away from you and crossing his arms across his chest, but still keeping your eye contact.

“Why are you on the attack? I was just speaking to one of OUR friends.” You argued back, gesturing between the two of you sharing a mutual friend. It’s not like he didn’t know Seungmin would NEVER try anything with you and even if he would, you were definitely not Kim Seungmin’s type.

“I’m not.” Felix stated quite bluntly and even though you were growing increasingly angry with the situation and the mixed signals he was giving off, you could tell Felix was trying to not let this escalate, “I was waiting for you inside like I said and then I see you being dragged upstairs by OUR friend, what am I supposed to think?”

It didn’t matter though, the way Felix had gone about asking these questions were out of line and maybe it was the alcohol in your system or maybe it was your self-respect kicking in, but you weren’t being accused of something that very clearly would never happen.

“Maybe think that it was Kim Seungmin I was with, my friend, your friend? If you don’t trust Seungmin that much, you should at least trust me enough to know I would NEVER do something like that you. Regardless of the fact we are only fuck buddies and you have no say over who I talk with anyway!” You exploded at Felix, pushing off the wall and walking up into his space with a scowl on your face.

Felix’s features fell into an almost pout at your sudden explosion and you saw hurt flash across his face after hearing your words.

Without giving Felix a chance to say anything, you continued, speaking more composed and at normal talking volume this time, “What is going on with you lately Felix?”

Felix froze in place by your question, like you had triggered a touchy topic with him.

When he didn’t respond you continued again, letting the rant that had been building up in you over the past week out.

“Between defending me against Yunseo, asking for more intimacy in our arrangement, rejecting any advances I make involving sex, being suspicious of me talking with Seungmin and this morning- I don’t know what to think Felix. What the fuck are these mixed signals?? You want me to be this laid-back fuck buddy one minute and the next you want me to be your unofficial girlfriend. It’s confusing as fuck. What do you want-”

You didn’t get to finish your sentence when Felix crashed his lips against yours, pushing you with force back up against Jisung’s still closed bedroom door.

His lips were hungry moving against yours, every movement they made was passion filled to the brim like he was trying to convey what all his previous actions of the week meant, but nothing was any clearer to you.

You were taken aback by his advances to begin with, but your lips moved just as hungrily against Felix’s, falling into the familiarity of kissing Felix. Kissing Felix was like a well-rehearsed dance, with months of practice and revisits.

The soft biting, he would apply to your bottom lip to get you to gasp, resulting in your mouth parting slightly to which he would take advantage of and glide his tongue between them, deepening the kiss making you moan out from the new sensation.

His hands roamed up your sides, then down again to rest upon your ass under your skirt where he gave you a strong squeeze, causing you to roughly break away from the kiss to let out a louder than you wanted moan.

Without hesitating Felix dropped his head into the crook of your neck as soon as your lips were removed from his, leaving wet imprints into the skin and adding more markings or replacing ones that were beginning to fade.

You tangled your hands in his silvery blonde locks and tugged earning a grunt from Felix as he rutted forward into you, pressing his hardening erection into you and pushing you further into the door.

You were consumed by his scent. Lemon and orange blossoms that had been drifting in the sea breeze glided on the air around you, sunk into your pores and demanded attention of your senses. Lulling you into giving in to him. You could never say no to the temptation. You breathed Felix, you wanted Felix, you loved Felix.

You loved Felix? There it was again. The overwhelming warmth spreading around and encasing your heart in the devotion to the man that had every opportunity to break it.

You halted your participation and froze against Felix. Felix immediately pulled away from you again, just enough to look into your scared eyes with his lust filled ones.

Felix’s desire for you, drifted out of his eyes as realisation began to fill them instead and he leaned forward so his forehead was resting perfectly against yours.

To your shock Felix let out a soft chuckle that sounded raspy with the hints of lust still remaining in his system.

“It’s okay Darling, I was scared too.” Felix admitted bringing a hand to rest on your cheek and play with a few strands of your hair to get you to look at him, bringing you nose to nose now.

Felix’s words only confused you further.

“Scared?” You repeated back almost dissociated from how hard you were trying to disconnect your emotions for Felix, so your feelings were no longer on display.

“I love you.” Felix whispered into a breath that tickled against your lips.

All lust was gone from his eyes, a new emotion that you had seen before filled his eyes that you were beginning to recognise. Love? Did Felix just say he loved you?

Your eyes widened as your brain registered what he had just said, your brain felt like it short-circuited snapping you back to reality.

Felix’s expression faltered slightly as he began to worry judging by your reaction, your mouth opening and then closing, and then repeating.

Felix cautiously slotted your chin into his thumb and pointer finger and tilted your head slightly to look directly into his eyes.

“I thought I felt it alone, I tried to hide it. It’s why I’ve been so distant and avoiding being too intimate with you, in case it slipped out. Tell me I’m not crazy. I know you feel this too.” Felix pleaded his eyes desperately searching your blown out eyes from shock.

“I-I…oh my god.” Was all you could seem to force out, before you swallowed hard and Felix finally felt like you were truly looking back at him, eyes no longer glazed over and distant.

“Sorry, you don’t have to say anything now. I don’t ever want to rush anything with you, I know that seems hypocritical considering how we started out, but I really do care so much for you Darling and I-” It was your turn to stop Felix from getting lost in his rambles, you pushed off the door behind you, cupping his face in your hands and pressed a soft, slow and love filled kiss to his lips.

Felix eagerly returned the kiss, lips moving slowly and passionately together, before you pulled away to look back into his eyes.

His eyes told you all you needed to know, and you couldn’t believe you didn’t see it before. It had been there the whole time, you were too caught up in your own confusion of feelings, to notice the feelings he’d been wearing on his sleeve the whole time.

“I love you too Felix.” You breathed out like a sigh of relief, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders at the admission.

You physically saw the relief and happiness spread across Felix’s features as he let your words soak in. His smile grew up to his eyes and his hands reached for yours, bringing them up to his smile to press quick loving kisses into the skin of the top of your hands.

You couldn’t help the giggle that left your lips at the tickling sensation that spread where his lips travelled.

“You have no idea, how long I’ve been wanting to tell you that.” Felix spoke with a giddy tone into your hands as he continued prepping kissing there.

Felix piqued your interest, how long was long? “Now I’m intrigued, how long?”

Felix smiled up at you from behind your hands and used them to tug you into his chest, where he wrapped you into his embrace, “It was confusing at the start, trying to figure out what was lust and what was love, but I knew you were special ever since that first night we slept together.”

You raised your eyebrows in surprise, you weren’t expecting him to have had feelings for you for this long.

“That’s why I’ve been avoiding sex, because sex wasn’t just sex for me anymore. I want to make love to you; I want you to feel how much I care for you, and I didn’t want to freak you out if I let it slip that I loved you while balls deep in you.” Felix laughed rubbing your hips to give his hands something to do.

You laughed with him, but you know that you never would have minded if he did. You might have been shocked for a second, but you know in your heart you would have confessed your feelings for him in return, regardless of the situation.

Felix’s words ignited your heart, he wanted you how you wanted him. Your feelings were mutual after all.

“Felix, I want nothing more than for you to make love to me.” You smiled watching the love in Felix’s eyes mixing with lust.

“Then let me love you.” Felix grinned moving his face toward you to bring you into another kiss, but before he could place his lips on yours, Jisung’s bedroom door swung open.

You both jumped at the intrusion and Felix instinctively pulled you completely into him, turning you both to the side so he was positioned slightly in front of you protectively.

Jisung stood in his doorway looking the most confused he’d ever been as he looked between Felix and you, then at you to Felix and he couldn’t bring the words to come out of his mouth.

Jisung shook his head forcing himself to address the awkward situation he had created by his arrival.

“Do I even want to know what’s going on here?” Jisung asked before realising you were both in his bedroom and annoyance appeared on his face, “YA! What are you both doing in here? Get out!” He whined.

Without responding to Jisung, Felix grabbed your hand in his, lacing his fingers through yours and while laughing like a kid that got caught with his hand in the cookie jar, dragged you out of the room behind him past a fuming Jisung.

Felix looked back at you as he raced for the stairs with you in tow behind him.

“Let’s get out of here darling.” He beamed at you before looking forward to pay attention to where his footing was going down the stairs.

As you watched Felix’s silvery blonde locks bouncing against his cheeks with every step he took, every now and again he would turn to look at you, making sure you were real, that you were following him wherever he was taking the two of you.

Every time he looked back, the party lights would dance across his face, reflecting in his eyes and you thought to yourself there was no one as beautiful as Felix, inside and out, and there was no where you would rather be, than hand in hand with the man you loved following him with your entire heart.

TAGLIST 🏷️

@beautifulgashinaxxxi @alyszaen @bangjaekepildon @whyyougottadothatbro @stopeatread @emmarose487 @starshine-moon @smally97 @helpsplease @uno7 @s00buwu @vumiixlyy @captivq @azurez

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© skzonthebrain

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OMG I literally screamed multiple times reading this … so good kinda made me wanna to go back to college😂 I really wish I knew how to give detailed feedbacks but sadly I don’t so I’ll just cry 😭💖

Perfect Distraction | lfl

❝𝐈 𝐚𝐥𝐰𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐬𝐚𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮…❞  

↳ Felix is the perfectly untouchable man you can only long for from the back of the college lecture hall; until a chance encounter and offer of distraction brings those yearnings closer than you ever thought was possible.

↳ Felix x female reader

↳ 8.6k

! Strong language, college au, strangers to friends to lovers, mutual pining, angst, slow burn, explicit sexual content, vanilla sex, oral sex (f. and m. rec), body worship, praise, use of pet names, sexual discovery, adult themes throughout !

「suitable for 18+ readers only」  「© July 2020, rewritten April 2023 by jl-micasea-fics」

Felix’s back was a profound thing.

It was where you found your gaze most often lingering when the monotony of lectures led your mind to wander, and perhaps that was natural; it stands to reason that one should firstly see what’s right in front of them. Perhaps the heightened interest with which you examined him day after day was also just as natural.

Or perhaps not.

Still; the extraordinary demanded your undivided attention. And that wasn’t to say it was Felix’s back itself that was extraordinary. By all accounts, it was a perfectly normal back. Rather it was the feelings that cropped up when examining said back with a slow and appreciative eye that it made it so special.

There had been changes since the term started; imperceptible to anyone else, you were sure. The span of his shoulders was broader now, the fit of his shirts a little snugger. The outlining curve of his shoulder blades had strengthened, his hunching over desk or rising into a stretch offered glimpses of the toned muscle beneath the cotton. The days where he ran late and thus rallied to make lectures in time were your favourite, for on those days the silver tresses usually gathered neatly at his nape were damp with the sweat of exertion, the pale skin beneath blushed. Occasionally he might scratch his neck, and you would wonder if he felt the tickle of your gaze burning so bright a hole into him, the prospect equal parts needlessly giddying and mortifying. Thoughts would roll around your mind, and arguably, were best kept there: would he be soft to touch? Perhaps he’d be surprisingly firm. How would his back look in the absence of a shirt?

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