WW&tCF (ft. Matilda) - FR: Class War - 'Revolting'

WW&tCF (ft. Matilda) - FR: Class War - 'Revolting'

'The children could only take so much pressure, so much discipline. And now, as they sang and tore up his classroom, Mr. Pratt could only stare to the horror at the front of the class: Miranda, his prize student, his teacher's pet, leading the charge from the heights of his desk... And bloody Turkentine below her, with the biggest shit-eating smirk he's ever seen.'

Okay, so some context under the cut:

a roleplay started with @bunnyonacupcake lead to a side-story post-factory (same verse as Factory Rejects) that follows Turkentine's class and its ongoing rivalry with the Class for Excellence. Said class is lead by Mr. Pratt, who is the most pretentious, deplorable, winning-obsessed man you'll ever meet. He's looks and sounds like Matt Berry if Matt Berry were a John Lennon kinnie, and holds his students to the highest standards that they've all become either snobby-nosed know-it-alls, or nervous wrecks.

One of those, is an AU of @bunnyonacupcake's Miranda Mary Piker. This little school-obsessed boffin is Pratt's parrot, watchdog, and star student. But over time, with influence from others (and some visits to Bill's shop), she eventually starts to see that maybe there's more to life than just studying and rules.

And so, I was listening to 'Revolting Children' from Matilda...

Thus came this little moment, when everything comes to a finalé.

Have some Turkentines. Because his face is really fun to draw.

Despite the other art, our musical wonka isn't a shitpost.

He's pretty complex, we just haven't posted about him yet. But he came about from the thought of "why are all Wonkas tall and thin? not all of them are going to have the metabolism of the gods." So suddenly our brain does its fixation thing and it turns out it was actually an alter we were taking inspiration from and we have this fabulous, complicated, messed up fellow owning our attention. This Wonka (He/She/It) is very prone to stress & spirals, and quite often finds himself obsessing over his own mortality. The way she presents herself on the tour, you'd mostly think she's just a bit of an asshole... until you realise she alliterates more when she's stressed, she keeps popping these little medicine candies in her mouth, occasionally she makes mildly concerning comments about death and temptation, and there's a Lazurus Room in the basement. "Memento Mori, Charlie".

Closing the factory was an overnight choice after she became paranoid that the world was out to get her. The tour was a choice after she obsessed over her own death during a sleepless spiral. This Wonka doesn't even want an heir, but it's yet another backup plan for when the night finally claims her. So he sets up a tour, and he trials them to the ultimate test: Temptation.

And when all is said and done, months into moving into the factory, Charlie learns the truth...

He looks to his new mentor, and he asks "You planned it, didn't you?" And she replies. "The hand of fate needs an arm, and I simply volunteered."

And that's not even getting into all the little details, nor the other characters: with such hits as Esports Streamer Mike Teavee only got his ticket cause 'Chat said it would be PogChamp', Tiktoker Violet & her Less Successful Tiktoker mom, Charlie Needs Therapy because his Mentor Refuses Therapy, Molly Bucket trying to protect her son and Accidentally Falling in Love With A Very Broken Person (aka 'Mr. Wonka is your dad now, Charlie'), the Oompa Loompa Night Shift, and Also Miranda Is Here And Wonka Pushed Her In. we love him a lot

CatCF Musical (re-write) - Memento Mori

How would you handle the choreography for Auf wiedersehen Augustus gloop from Charlie and the chocolate factory the musical?

Oh we have two left-feet and a bad memory, so we couldn't even tell you the coreography for the current musical versions of AwAG.

Not having a 'chocolate lagoon' or a tiny hose-sized pipe would be a good start for whatever's going on there though.

The Wonderful Whimsical Willy Wonka: a mystery of magical candy concoctions, the pinnacle of confectioners, and proof that you should never meet your heroes.

He(/she/it) may seem fine at first; eccentric of course- what inventor isn't- but quite the bit self-grandiose, tells you not to eat anything whilst chewing on chocolate. Yet, there's little quirks... rushed speech, compulsive alliteration, a posh English accent that occasionally slips into something less rehearsed, the unwrapping of little candies from a hidden pocket when stressed, and an odd fixation on Temptation and Death that results in a Las Vegas-esque musical number mid-tour (Did he practice that?!)

A man prone to spirals, to fixations, to paranoia of her own mind, who closed its factory certain the world was out to get it, who reopened its factory after, at 3am in the dark of its office, realised that no Lazarus Machine nor Wonka-Vite would likely succeed. Willy Wonka did not want an heir, but it had become another nocturnal necessity.

And so: Six tickets, Six tests of temptation.

"Gloop, Teavee, Beauregarde, Salt, Piker, Bucket! Do come in.~"