I Think My Dad Stopped Loving Me The Day He Realized I Was Turning Into Him.

I think my dad stopped loving me the day he realized I was turning into him.

We talk about needing love as children but what about the children who grew up with love but had it taken away as soon as their parents realized they were more like themselves than they could love.

Have you ever looked at someone and thought I wanna love you.

I wanna love you when you're in so much pain you don't know what to do with yourself. When you are in so much pain, I feel like I feel it too.

I wanna love you when you are happy. So happy it's like the sun has settled beneath your skin, and I have to squint so I can see you because you're too beautiful to look away from.

I wanna love you when you're angry and venting.

I wanna love you when you're calm and we are bored together. When life is outside, our window passes us by like spilled molasses. Sticky and syrupy sweet.

I just wanna love you.

I wanna love you in the morning when your face is puffy and your hair is a rats nest.

I wanna love you when we're grocery shopping and fighting over what brand of chips to buy.

I wanna love you even when loving you is hard, and it would be so much easier to not love you anymore.

I wanna love you even when our love fades.

I wanna love you even when I no longer love you.

I want our love to be a choice and an obsession.

I wanna love you with an intensity that scares me.

There's a beauty in being forgotten. If only I could find it.

And he said, " Why don't you find someone to love you if you're so desperate to be loved."

Don't give me some pretty words wrapped up in a bow.

Give me your most hated emotions shoved in a box wrapped in barbed wire.

Make me mourn with you.

Make me feel you pain, cut me on the edge of your desperation to change what's already carved in stone.

Make me scream with heartbreak.

Make me feel.

I am a flower, learning how to bloom.