Featherofeeling - I Guess I Go Here Now

Please help me get better so I can write more for you.

Guys I hate to do this again, but I need help. I had really thought by now that we’d be in a better situation, that my health would have gotten better or at the very least remained stable enough that I could live with my symptoms. But I can’t. I can’t go on living with acute attacks of pain in my side that take my breath away so that I can’t even cry, and I certainly cannot go on enduring the chronic, exhausting pain that eating is causing me. (living on clear broth atm for the last few weeks) I need testing and I need it sooner rather than later, and my insurance is fighting me for every penny not going to cover enough, though they have since took a chunk out of my previous bills.

At the moment it looks like my endoscopy and biopsy alone is going to cost anywhere between $3000 to $4000, and my insurance is unlikely to cover all of it. I also need another ultrasound which my insurance is bringing down to $300 from $500. None of this even covers the pathologist fee or the anesthetist who cannot give me an estimated cost at this time, nor does it cover follow up treatments. This is to say little of the medical bills from January when a routine CT scan very nearly could have killed me as I went into delayed anaphylactic shock from the IV contrast solution. That bill is still being disputed by my provider, but is so far sitting at several thousand dollars worth of medical debt. (Update: as of this morning they have adjusted their costs by a few hundred dollars but it’s still bordering on $1.5k+)

I’m applying for medical assistance, but because we earn just above the threshold, help is unlikely, leaving us to negotiate payment plans which still leave us with very little money to live on each month. God forbid something else in the house breaks because we wont be able to fix it without help. My parents— who are 4000 miles away— are already paying my remaining dental bills.

Several people have told me to set up a gofundme or a youcaring, and I am looking into those right now and hope to set them up properly once I have a more accurate idea of what my bills will be (and will post photos and screenshots of them), but in the meantime my paypal is up and running. (if you cannot use paypalme then the email for it is fi.s.bizzel @ live.com) Even if all you can spare is $2, that’d $2 toward bus fair to get to clinics so husband doesn’t need to keep driving me everywhere.

In return I will write you anything you want. Anything. My main fandoms are Discworld, Dishonored, Dragon Age, The Parasol Protectorate and Finishing School, The Lies of Locke Lamorra and some Star Wars but I will turn my hand to just about anything for you. I can even post original content if anyone would be interested in that. I’m currently working on a polyamorous supernatural romance which several people have expressed interest in, donating would enable me to keep working on this and hopefully get it up on amazon kindle sooner, and I would count donations towards receiving a final e-format of the book if you so desire.

And I know it’s a lot to ask for, I really do know. I’ve looked at my friends posting things like this before and wished I could do more than give them my last $10 for that month. But even if all you can do is reblog and send well wishes, that too will help a lot and I will forever appreciate it. I wouldn’t be doing this again if it wasn’t bordering on desperate, and I hope you can forgive me, especially when I know there are others out there so much worse off. But I really am at breaking point mentally with trying to deal with this. I can’t hide that anymore.

Thank you to everyone so far who has sent me lovely messages and words of encouragement. You give me hope and strength where I thought there was no more to be had. I love you, and I hope you know that.

-tumblr mom x

(updated for insurance updates, more fandoms, and emphasis that I am offering an e-book in return for a donation, which if you would like a personalized e-copy, please let me know <3)

it baffles me that theres people who can just… just sit down and take out their homework and be like “time to work yes” and actually…get things done???? without a problem??? and move on?????? thats wild

The past is rarely as we imagine it.

Sometimes I’m like “ancient greek plays are so old, how am i going to relate to the characters?” but then 

13 days to #TellTheWindAndFire

Theme - Rebellion

“Do the buried really think that they’re going to start a revolution in my name?”