Hi Tumblr, This Is Gonna Be A Bit Of A Vent Post. Sorry..

Hi Tumblr, this is gonna be a bit of a vent post. Sorry..

So all my life I've been the oldest out of 3. I've been the responsible one, the babysitter, the golden child. Earlier this year, my Mumma moved in with 2 of her kids. One of them is turning 3 soon, and the other is a few months younger than me. In the household, I'm still the oldest.

The parents have plans to go to Boston, the week before Christmas, to see Mumma's family. That includes her third child, he's 24. I'm no longer the oldest. I know it's stupid, but I freak out everytime I think about it.

I'm getting replaced. There's a new oldest, a new responsibility one, a new golden child. I'll be useless to the family. I won't have anything to contribute! I'm not funny and I can't light up the room like Hero. I'm not strong and I can't put an end to bullshit like Andrew. All I am is being responsible and being good and polite.

I know it'll never happen, but I'm scared I'll just be cast aside, when we meet Shane. No one will want to talk to or hang out with me because there's a new oldest. One who's cool and above the drinking age and has a girlfriend. I'm scared that now that I'm not the oldest anymore, everyone will remember how much of an asshole I was when I was younger and that'll be my new title. Axton the Asshole. The second oldest. The quiet jerky selfish mean one who hates everything and everyone.

I want to meet Shane, but I'm just scared everything will change when we do. I'm worried that everyone will forget about me and I'll just be sitting alone the whole time we're there.

I hope typing this will help me get over it.

I didn't draw BUT I pretended I was in a horror movie while going through a corn maze with Hero.

So there's that.

We died because we missed the last sign.. rip movie selves..

I gotta run posting pictures of us, by him first, but here, have a moon picture I took!

I should change my little theme! Maybe purple?? Oooo what if I draw something!! I've never made my own header picture thing before!!

I really wanted to draw today but my hands wouldn't let me. I have the ideas, but I can't put them on paper for some reason. So I drew a little guy and tried to do pose stuff

This is Little Guy btw

Hopefully tomorrow I can get some ideas out!

Is it November 4th? Yes. Am I listening to Christmas music already? Absolutely!

It brings me joy! I am flapping my hands, wiggling, and squawking, while trying to draw my little frog. Please let me have this I'm so happy rn!

My boy!! I love him sm!! My friend gave him to me and I will cherish him and give him a sandcastle!!

HIS TAILS SPIN!!! *happy screaming*