Peter: Hey, Whats Scotts Type?

Peter: Hey, what’s Scott’s type?

Jean: Dark eyes, oblivious, older than him, loves the color silver.

Peter: Huh, that kind of sounds like me. Too bad we’re just friends.

Jean: Did I mention oblivious?

Peter: Yeah?

Jean: Okay, just checking.

Jean: So this is my wife Jubilation, her favorite color is yellow, she likes her coffee with two milks and nine sugars, she won’t eat cookies that aren’t burnt to a crisp, her favorite season is summer because it’s warm, and she’s the love of my life. What about you?

Scott: Uh. This is my husband Pietro and I think I saw him eat an apple once.

Pietro: Okay, Scott. This is getting ridiculous now. It is clear that there is a sexual tension between us, but for some reason you decide not to act on it.

Scott: Um...

Pietro: Here, I made a PowerPoint presentation on why we should kiss:

1. I am very pretty

2. This is a classic enemies to lovers situation.

Crystal: Pietro, we're married...

Pietro: Details.

Scott: Don’t be scared, I’ll protect you.

Peter: Babe, you really don’t ha-

*loud bang, lights go out*

Scott: *pushes Peter* KILL HIM NOT ME 

Peter: …

Scott: Ororo, do you know Peter’s type?

Ororo: Brown hair, always wears sunglasses, oblivious, leadership qualities.

Scott: Weird, that sounds like me.

Ororo: That’s because it is you, you oblivious dumbass. Now go ask him out.

Cyclops: I’m gonna take you out.

Quicksilver: Great, it’s a date.

Cyclops: I meant that as a threat.

Quicksilver: I know, I’ll pick you up at eight.