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Things Are Happening On Reddit

A post on the r/energydrinks subreddit with a picture of a monster drink frozen into a popsicle and the title "Does making energy drinks into popsicles lower the efficacy if the caffeine? I enjoy mixing together multiple kinds of energy drinks and freezing them into caffeinesciles... but if the freezing process is degrading the caffeine molecules, I'll stop immediately. I need maximum torque."
A comment from u/longrange_tiddymilk that reads "No it shouldn't change the caffeine bioavailability or it's effectiveness. Have you tried shoving the Popsicle up your ass?" 
OP u/Limo-Dick_Calvin replies, "No, I haven't but if I were to boof an energy drink I think this would definitely be the way to do it. I think I'll schedule a time for myself to boof a caffeinesicle tomorrow at 11am. Edit: I did it. [link to update post]" 
u/Glad-Jellyfish-69 replies, "bro is going to the ER with frostbite in their colon [frozen emoji]"
Post from u/Limp-Dick_Calvin on r/energydrinks reading: "Update: Energy Drink Popsicle Successfully Boofed. Trip Report: 
Hey guys, its limp dick calvin, many of you might of seen my post yesterday about my practice of freezing my energy drinks into icy caffeinesicles for my sucking pleasure. Now, quite a few creative folks recommended that I boof the popsicle for maximum caffeine absorption. I've always wanted to boof something, whether that be alcohol, acid, or caffeine, but I never have. Acid is feasible I guess, but the idea of pouring a liquid down my rectum just sounds difficult and unpleasant. For one, my butthole is rather tight as it has never been penetrated, so I can't imagine my brown balloon knot would be accepting of any liquid visitors, if you know what I mean. Another thing is if I managed to get the liquid in there, and then stood up, is it just coming right back out? Just a total mess of a concept imo. However, a caffeinesicle actually provides me with the perfect way to get an energy drink up my asshole. So, I froze a thinner than usual popsicle last night with a mixture of C4 and monster energy, and this morning at 11am, I went into my backyard and used a chair to sit on the popsicle, successfully booing it. I didn't know if I should bob up and down on it like a dildo, so l just sat there. And boy, was it COLD. I felt like I was being possessed by a frost demon. However, I felt absolutely electrified. Like my blood was made of energy drink itself. I don't know if it was the freezing cold, or the rapid absorption of caffeine through my colon, or both. This felt like adderall being mainlined into my veins."
continued from previous post: "After about 3 minutes or so, the popiscle had completely melted in my asshole. I looked around for witnesses, stood up, pulled up my pants, and went to go take a shower in case any leaked out onto my legs. It's been 3 hours since and I still feel like a thousand bucks. I feel like all my brain fog is gone and if I wanted to, I could teach myself how to do commercial real estate in like 6 hours of research. I feel like my brain is limitless. Anyway, just wanted to share with you guys. I'll probably be doing this a couple times a week now. That's about it. See ya."

Comment from u/ImpactFire1021: "I need to get off this app man"

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More Posts from Issacballsac

1 year ago

THRIFT STORE

THRIFT STORE

Gender Neutral Reader 

You cannot tell me he doesn’t thrift daily

Cause ur not gonna find that smiley face set piece in a mall

Wakes you up early as hell to get there before anyone else

Depending on ur position in his life depends on how he’ll wake you up to go

Family member he’ll burst into ur room and drag your ass to the nearest thrift store

If you’re just friends or S/O tho he’ll appear out your window

Once you guys eventually get there though!

He’s scouting for shit

All kinds of shit

Weird antiques that he knows he’ll never use/need

Clothes

Etc.

Has a hello Kitty disc player he found at a GoodWill

Finds a random skeleton and scares the hell outta u with it

The staff knows him BY NAME he’s there so often

A little shit but if there’s no cart available he’ll hold ur stuff while you check out other things

He’s a JORTS supporter and WILL try and put u on

Has a fond memory of getting his two year old sonic the hedgehog watch

THRIFT STORE

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1 year ago

Just thrifted the entirety of SpongeBob season 1 on CD 🤝


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1 year ago

Def using that line ty bro🤝

I took one of those art class things and the girl next to me.

1 year ago

I would be an absolutely crazy yugioh dueler trust me bro

I Would Be An Absolutely Crazy Yugioh Dueler Trust Me Bro

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1 year ago

QUIET TIMES

QUIET TIMES

16:27, Tuesday

The scratches of your pencil flooded your mind as your eyebrows scrunched in deep thought. The current assignment for school had been more grueling than anticipated.

Frustration hit as you took a small break to clear your mind.

Mid-exhale a loud knock at your door alerted you. Your parents had gone out for their anniversary leaving the house to you.

Cautiously approaching the front door you peaked out the hole to see none other than Shinichi Okazaki.

「Why are you here, Shin?」

「To see you, of course!」 He flashed his most innocent smile and shook the door knob.

With an exasperated sigh, you reluctantly opened the door for the boy, 「Thanks!」

Throwing yourself on the couch you stare over at your new guest. 「Why are you actually here?」 You ask once again.

Turning to you with a mischievous glimmer in his eyes he parts his lips, 「Help me dye my hair.」

Scoffing softly you smirk, 「That’s all? I thought it’d be more drastic.」 He threw his head back dramatically, 「So are you gonna help or not?」

「Sure.」

Giddily pulling out two boxes of hair dye from his pocket he strutted towards the bathroom. 「Well? What’re we waiting for?」

16:45, Tuesday

The snap of the protective gloves alerted Shin whom had just taken an—unpleasant—seat on the bathroom tile. 「Alright you’re hair is pretty light already so we probably shouldn’t let the bleach sit in it too long.」

Sighing deeply, 「Just make sure my hair doesn’t turn brassy.」, he leaned backwards onto your legs.

Fully mixing the color concoction together you set it aside in exchange for bleach. Unwillingly sniffing it as you applied it along Shin’s hair.

「Tingly.」 He snipped as the bleach settled. His comments died down as the time went on and his hair lightened. The timer softly ticking away.

Sitting in blissful silence his eyes wandered to your unfinished homework. 「Yikes, so glad I don’t have to do that.」 He snickered as you glared at his unhelpful comment. 「Don’t look at me like that, take it as a compliment, you’re smart!」 Dropping your glare as the timer for his bleach went off.

Shinichi instinctually following behind you, the both of you made your return to the bathroom. 「I think one round of bleach is fine, but, are you sure you want this blue color?」

「Yeah, it’s gonna look nice, if you don’t mess it up of course.」

Grabbing the sky stained bowl you cut your eyes at him, 「You’re hilarious.」

Lathering his hair in blue the slouching of the dye rang through your ears.

The peace ensued as you both let the dye sit. A comforting silence rather than awkward.

Having the timer go off a final time you began to wash the excess dye out of Shin’s hair.

「Sick bowl cut, Shin.」 You slyly snickered at his wet hair. 「I look good regardless.」 He immediately retorted simultaneously spiking up his hair.

「Anyways—thanks for the help! The ladies will love this.」

「Anytime! Now go on, the women are getting impatient can’t you hear it?」 His brows quirked in confusion.

Taking on a higher pitch you whined, 「Oh Shin get over here with that Sonic hair of yours! My money is waiting!」

「Shut up.」 He playfully pushed you away.

QUIET TIMES

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