juicypassionfruit

♋️,20,She/Her

142 posts

Need To Change

Summary: Bam is stuck in his toxic ways.

Gn reader

Warnings: Swearing, Toxic Bam, Implied smut

Bam woke up sweating, his long hair sticking to his forehead. The blanket that covered him was quickly kicked off. It was normally freezing cold in his room, the change in temperature woke him up from a deep sleep. He got up and walked over to the window. As soon as he opened it the morning air cooled his body instantly.

Memories from last night flashed in his mind. Her eyes gave him that look he couldn't resist, the curve in her lips when he whispered sweet nothings into her ear. The sounds she made when he brought her back home. The argument that took place after he told her she should go. Last time he let her stay and he couldn't possibly let her stay over another night. Bam didn't know why he treated Jenn this way. It wasn't always intentional, sometimes it was just easier. The image of tears coming down her face didn't leave his mind. Couldn't leave his mind.

It was normal for them to go through a bad phase. Where one moment he is completely obsessed and the next he wants nothing to do with her. He can admit that it wasn't healthy but he does love her or at least has some love for her.

In a few days they'll be talking again and go back to the way it was, Bam knew that for certain. He knew she'd never be able to stay away for long and maybe, for some twisted reason, that's why he acted the way he did. Why he'd take her to places she liked, just to remind her they weren't dating and probably never would.

Bam was wide awake with no chance of going back to sleep. The sun was beginning to rise and the birds were chirping louder and louder, making him even more annoyed than he already was. It seemed like today was gonna be one of those days. 'Fuck' he mumbled to himself and went into the bathroom to get ready.

He'd be lying if he said it wasn't peaceful, the quiet house in the early morning, but it was too quiet for his liking. If Bam had to be up so did everyone else. Downstairs he grabbed a pot and a pan and ran back upstairs to April and Phil's room. He was fighting the urge to laugh while opening the door. As they quietly slept, the only sound in the room was the pots and pans banging together. "You guys are wasting the day away, c'mon it's already six-thirty!" April sat up quick with a gasp, "Bam!" Phil woke up confused as ever but went back to sleep when he realized it was just Bam being Bam. It made him feel slightly better. He hunched over and laughed, leaving not too long after that.

Skating seemed to be the solution to all his problems. Mad? Skate. Sad? Skate. Constantly arguing with the person you kinda love but treat horribly? Skate. It was the easiest way for him to get rid of his frustrations, and anyway, he always needed more clips. For the rest of the morning, he skated. He filmed himself since no one was awake at this time and his friends probably wouldn't be till the late afternoon.

Bam sat on the edge of the drop reviewing his videos. As it got later in the morning, more and more kids showed up to skate. The once empty park was now filled with mostly kids and some adult skaters. He decided that filming a few more clips should be good then he'd leave. When he stood up he saw three of his friends walking toward him. The watch on his wrist said it was ten-thirty. "A little early for you, fucks isn't it?"

Ryan, Raab, and Dico stood at the bottom of the drop and looked up at him, "Bam this is the earliest you've been up since elementary school." Ryan pointed out making the other two laugh. It was an exaggeration but true for the most part, he hasn't been up early for no reason in years. His not-so-subtle change in behavior was more noticeable than he'd like. In all honesty, none of them wanted to be there, but a very concerned April called all of them to check on Bam.

"Can you move out of the fuckin' way so I can skate?" He ignored the mocking waiting for them to step aside. This was his usual attitude when skating especially when he was determined to get some footage. They moved out of his way and watched him dropdown. Bam was doing good until he tried to grind the rail, losing his balance and falling face first to the ground. His board rolled backward towards his friends while he lay on the ground groaning in annoyance and pain. Dico kicked the board back to him, hitting his foot. Bam jumped back onto his board to redo the trick. After falling again he stayed on the ground. The guys walked over to him and stared at him as he lay on the ground with his eyes closed.

"Dude, what the fuck is your deal?" Ryan asked lighting the cigarette that sat in his mouth. Bam opened his eyes and sat up hugging his knees. "Nothing" Clearly it wasn't just 'nothing' but Ryan didn't push any further. "Okay. Let's go fuck with Don Vito's car" Smoke blew from Ry's mouth and into Raab's face who waved it away. Dico stood there plotting what to do with the car and how they'd destroy it this time. Ryan extended his arm to help Bam up. He took it and they walked out of the park.

Back home Bam felt a little better. Being around his friends distracted him from his thoughts. The plan to ruin Don Vito's car was a success, to say the least. His car was in millions of pieces, completely obliterated. It felt wrong but Bam was actually happier after destroying the car. Not only was it fun, but the reaction of his uncle was priceless. He was red in the face yelling at him about yet another car he had broken, which made it even better. Phil and April scolded him of course and made sure he'd get him a new car.

The next few days consisted of Bam losing sleep from thinking too much. Leading to a crabby exhausted Bam, which no one liked. Jenn still hasn't called or texted and the thought of her being done with his bullshit made him sick to his stomach. His friends were over how he was acting, never feeling sorry for him once. Ryan made sure to put his two cents in and let him know that it's the least he deserves for treating her so badly. It definitely made Bam stop feeling sorry for himself, but it still hurt she never called to end it.

The guys came over constantly, checking in on how he was doing and getting annoyed when his behavior wasn't improved. They did all they could do by getting him out of the house and giving him pep talks. In the middle of the guys setting Bam right, she called. They've only seen him move that quick when someone had a snake near them. He sat there and let it ring for a few seconds before answering, "Hey, what's up" The casual tone in his voice was the complete opposite of how he was feeling. 'Was she calling to end it officially?' "Hey, I've missed you" She spoke. Relief filled his body and a smile appeared on his face, "Yeah? I've missed you too"

Ryan rolled his eyes and groaned, Raab and Dico chuckled at his reaction. "How could they still be a thing?" Ry whispered loudly to them while Bam laughed and made plans with Jenn. "Maybe they're perfect for each other" Dico shrugged and Raab shook his head, "Definitely not. he deserves someone slightly better, she did cheat on him."

"Yeah, do you remember what he did to make her cheat?" Ryan shook his head in dismay. Raab instantly remembered and laughed, "Ohh yeah. Jesus get those two away from each other."

Immediately Bam's attitude was different. Knowing he didn't lose her for good felt great. As he hung up he laughed to himself and thought about him going crazy not talking to her for a few days. "I like her. Really like her. I mean I was going insane!"

"Noo Bam!" His friends booed him, strongly disagreeing. He waved them off and started getting ready for his not date.

Jenn made plans to go to the bar and then some underground concert later. Bam of course was for it, most of his nights out were like that.

She got there early and told him to meet her at the bar. Still not wanting to seem desperate he arrived a little late. About five minutes late. Ryan laughed when he told him he intentionally wanted to be five minutes late and not a minute later.

When he walked into the bar he looked around for Jenn. Bam spotted her playing pool and started to walk over to them. As he got closer, some random walked up to her and kissed her. Jenn made direct eye contact while kissing the greaseball she was with. The anger and hurt he felt was too much. He began to stomp over there, but a strong hand grabbed his shoulder stopping him. "It's not worth it, man" Ryan wasn't wrong but he wanted to feel the self-satisfaction of ending it and making her seem like the bad guy.

"C'mon Bam. It's better this way." With a slight nod and sigh they walked out. Ryan laughed to himself and patted his back, "Dude, there's plenty of people in this city."

"Yeah, whatever"

It's been weeks since he left Jenn. Constantly fighting the urge to not call or text her. Bam's been bummed out but fine for the most part. He actually tried to move on and hung out with a few people, but they didn't make him feel the way she did. It seemed like no one had what he was looking for, although he didn't really know what he was looking for. Bam's mentality was if he found the right person he'd know immediately.

After a while, he realized that he had better things to do than be sad over Jenn. Bam had his own show in the works and he was already in Jackass the show and the first movie. It almost felt wrong to feel sad when he had so much to appreciate.

The relief everyone felt when Bam finally acted like his usual chaotic self and not the forced chaos he created. April knew it was all because Bam snapped out of whatever was going on but when Ryan took credit for 'getting' Bam back, she couldn't help but laugh with everyone.

To celebrate Ryan decided it'd be a good idea to take Bam out. Their favorite bar had missed him especially when it's been a full month since he's been their last. They guys couldn't be paid to stay away for that long.

The four guys walked into the bar laughing. Raab and Dico ran to their favorite table like little kids. Ryan shook his head and walked over to the table with Bam. A round of their favorite beers was set on the table after a few minutes.

On his way back from the bathroom, Ryan was stopped by a girl and her friend. The smile on his face grew while they talked. From their seats, Bam had the perfect view of them. Dico and Raab would have to turn around all the way to see Ryan flirt, which Bam made sure they didn't do so it wasn't obvious he was staring at them.

Ryan walked back to the table acting as if nothing happened. "What'd they want?" Raab asked and he just shrugged, "Well one of them thought I was good looking and the other was interested in Bam, but I said he wasn't looking for anything."

Bam threw his hands up, "Dude!" It was a surprise that his best friend didn't act like his wingman. Normally when they went out and two best friends approached them or even just one of them, they knew what it meant. "I didn't know if you could handle any kind of relationship with someone, even if it's just one night." Knowing he was probably right, he didn't argue it.

The night continued on like normal as they drank more and more. Before any of them knew it they were completely drunk, all except Ryan who was the designated driver.

The next morning Bam felt sick. His head and body aching from too much alcohol the night before. He walked downstairs and grabbed a glass of water taking two tablets of ibuprofen. As he recovered he started to get ready to go skating.

It was a slow day at the park, not too many people were there despite it being early in the afternoon. Bam skated around, doing little tricks as a warm up before getting into the harder ones. He enjoyed recording his progress and the cool tricks he could do but today wasn’t one of those days.

He dropped down from the drop and did a small trick as he went up the fun box. As he was coming down he bumped into someone. They both fell off their boards and onto the ground. “Fuck” Bam groaned.

He sat up and looked at the other person laying beside him, “Sorry. I didn’t see you” Bam got up and extended his arm. They took it and said it was okay.

Bam was attracted to them instantly. “Im Bam Margera.” He smiled

“Im Y/n” They returned the smile. The two made small talk and watched each other skate around. Both enjoying each others company, since they were the only two good skaters in the park.

It was early evening now. The sun was getting ready to set and it was getting colder by the minute. Y/n decided it was time to go home. “Well, Margera. Its been fun but I better get home. See you around.”

“Yeah. See ya.” Y/n started walking away and out of the park. Bam didnt wanna miss his opportunity to not see them again so he skated after them. “Wait”

“Can I get your number? It’d be cool to hang out again.” They smiled and gave him their number. Bam smiled and they went their separate ways.

It was now night and Bam found himself with no plans. There was nothing to do it seemed like. Ryan and the others decided to stay in and relax. Bam felt restless and in need of something to do.

The idea to text Y/n crossed his mind. ‘Were they even awake?’ With nothing to lose he sent them a text. While he waited he started editing some clips. His phone buzzed and he checked it immediately. Y/n was awake and bored just like him. He had no specific plan in mind, but he told them to get ready and meet at the park.

He put on a hoodie and his shoes and left the house.

The park was closed at these hours but it was an easy meeting place and they didn’t necessarily have to skate there, or skate at all for that matter. Just being out and doing something was enough for Bam. Y/n arrived a few minutes after he did. They sat on their boards and talked for a while.

“Hey, I know a spot we can hang out at. We can go if you want?” Y/n suggested and Bam smiled loving the idea. They both got up and he followed them on his board, excited to see where this spot was.

The streets were empty and quiet, minus the sound of their boards rolling in the middle of the street. It was dimly lit, the streetlights only lighting up so much. Cold wind hitting their faces as they skated.

After skating all over the city and walking miles through too many bushes, they made it to the place Y/n was talking about it. It was hidden away pretty well. They sat on top of a grassy hill with the perfect view of the small town. Bam could see the lights turning red and green, and the orange streetlights. It was so pretty. “Wow” He said to himself, but it was loud enough for them to hear.

“Its my favorite spot to go. You better not tell anyone about this or ill have to kick your ass” They said laughing. Bam laughed and promised he wouldn’t, making sure to add they probably wouldn’t be able to kick his ass. They continued talking and enjoying the view.

Bam glanced at Y/n and smiled. When they noticed they blushed, “What?” He shook his head but didn’t look away. They were already pretty close to each other but it still felt so far. When he finally looked away, Y/n looked at him. He looked so pretty. He was pretty, all the time. “Bam?” Their voice was soft, almost embarrassed to say anything else.

He looked back at them and smirked. Knowing exactly what they were about to say or ask. Without hesitating, he placed his hand on their cheek and leaned in close. His lips ghosted over theirs. “Is this okay?” He whispered and Y/n nodded. Wanting nothing more than to feel his lips.

Bam gently placed his lips onto theirs. Y/n’s hands wrapped around his neck pulling him closer. He pressed his lips onto theirs a little harder, making sure they’d feel how bad he’s been wanting to kiss them. The kiss got more intense by the minute. Desperately needing more of each other.

He pulled away to catch his breath. Y/n looked up at him through their eyelashes, “Do you wanna finish what we started?” Bam let out a breathless laugh and nodded leaning in to kiss them again.

They both laid beside each other staring at the stars. “Now what?” Y/n looked over at him. Bam looked back at them and smiled, “Can I take you out on a date?”

“That’d be nice” They smiled

The two decided it was time to go home and Bam said he’d let Y/n know when their date was.

The next morning Bam made sure to tell Ryan all about Y/n and their day plus night together. As long as Bam wouldn’t treat them badly, he was all for this new person that he had yet to meet. Bam swore on everything that he wouldn’t go back to being as toxic as he was when he was with Jenn, and that was enough for Ryan.

Need To Change

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