I Had A Bad Night Last Night But Ur Jungkook Fic Did A Great Job Of Distracting Me And I Cant Wait For

i had a bad night last night but ur jungkook fic did a great job of distracting me and i cant wait for more!! great job

omg!! I’m sorry that you had a bad night, but I’m so glad that I was able to distract you from your night! Thank you so much for reading~ x3

His Motivation (Doctor!Taehyung x Reader)

So this is the fastest I’ve ever finished a request omg. I saw the request in my inbox and I got this idea and it wouldn’t leave my head. I spent a good few hours of my day writing this and I’m proud of it for the most part!

Request: Taehyung fluff+drama/ Doctor AU

2.8k words | drama ✞ | fluff ♡ ⇨ Masterlist ⇦

It had been a few years since medical school was officially over; full of excruciatingly long classes and difficult teachers that made Taehyung want to pull his hair out. Every time he thinks back to his school years, he can’t help but be relieved that they were over. It was a miracle that he pulled it through all that school, and every time he thought about it, the weirder it felt.

He didn’t have a clear reason on why he wanted to become a doctor in the first place. It was never his dream and he always thought it to be a waste of money to go to school for that long. The pay off was great, but he wasn’t a patient person. The thought of going through 8 more years of school after getting out of 12 years of school was self torture.

Something in his heart changed during his junior year of high school, and he couldn’t find the exact pin point. Home life had become hard, and his brothers were never around anymore because they had already graduated and run off to college. His mom was in perfect health, but his dad had been diagnosed with testicular cancer in the middle of his junior year.

His oldest brother, Seokjin, had gone off to school to become a doctor while his other older brother, Namjoon, just went to get some basics before making a concrete decision. Neither of them had the opportunity to come home and visit very often, so Taehyung and his mom had to slowly watch their beloved family member die. Taehyung thought for a long time that his dad’s slow death was the reason he had decided to study medical, but now that he was through with school, he wasn’t sure.

It could have also been the fact that his oldest brother was passionate about becoming a doctor, and Taehyung enjoyed hearing him talk about all the things he was studying in his classes. They would call at least once a week for a good two years before Taehyung made his decision.

There was an underlying feeling in his gut that he knew perfectly well what had caused his perseverance during all the schooling. It was like something got lost in translation when he would try and transfer his feelings from his heart to his brain. There was only one other thing that Taehyung could guess would create this feeling.

That girl.

She was in his every class when the two of them first started medical school. She had taken to sitting near him since their schedules lined up almost perfectly, and he didn’t mind. She was an odd person to be interested in becoming a doctor; she was clumsy and forgetful, and a danger to herself just as much as she was to other people.

He couldn’t help but notice her determination when they would have lab projects and hands on activities. No one ever wanted to be her partner for anything because of her tendency to mess things up.

Naturally, Taehyung became her go-to partner, and he didn’t have the heart to reject her. During their first few, he felt like he was pulling the whole activity together single handedly. She would offer to help, but he refused it most of the time. If she had some part in it, he was afraid she would mess it up.

It didn’t take long for her to get fed up with being told to just watch, and she became very pushy about having a part in the activities. Taehyung refused at first, but it didn’t take long for her to worm her way into becoming involved more and more. It didn’t take long before he let her do her part in the process, and she was surprisingly fantastic at everything. Her previous clumsiness and forgetfulness seemed like a secondary personality when they would work together. Watching her work was more captivating than the actual work was.

She continued on with medical school alongside him, and their acquaintanceship slowly turned into a friendship. Soon they were planning their classes out together to stay in touch. They were always partners and they scheduled study dates all the time in the early years. School became a whole lot more fun than it had been previously.

It wasn’t until their fourth year that things started to change. His dad’s condition had become so much worse, and Taehyung started falling behind in school. He spent a lot of his time going home and being with his family, and school became a secondary priority. He was skipping more than he was attending, and he didn’t bother contacting her to tell her what had been going on. She sent him so many worried texts when he wouldn’t show up, and on days when he did, he didn’t talk to her.

It wasn’t long before she had given up on speaking to him anymore. The semester ended and they planned their classes on their own accord.

He had been slightly hoping that fate would put them in at least one class together, but from that year on, he never saw her again. She didn’t contact him and he didn’t have the heart to contact her. After a year and one too many drinks, he ended up deleting her contact out of drunken anger.

Once his dad’s suffering on earth finally ended, Taehyung felt like he was closing himself off from the world. School became his only focus, and he didn’t have the heart to really go out and do anything.

It took him a good year to finally feel like himself again. He met his current friends, Jungkook and Jimin, when he started attending a gym that was walking distance from his apartment. They would hang out all the time when he wasn’t in school or studying, and Taehyung finally felt like a person again.

He had chosen to forget about her and everything she was to him at that point in his life. He tried to forget her name and her face, and he felt like he could finally move on from her. He didn’t bother telling Jungkook or Jimin about her since he decided to put her in the past.

His residency soon ended as his career was officially taking off. A hospital not too far from his current living space accepted his application, and his long school years were finally coming to an end.

His first day at work was the following week, but he didn’t feel too nervous. The first few days of the job were a little stressful, but it didn’t take long for him to feel like he was in his place. He was slowly learning all the other nurses and doctors names and faces, but there was still so much for him to learn.

Most of his nights were late just like his residency had been, but he didn’t mind. He actually liked the feel of the hospital at night more so than during the day.

His long shift was finally coming to a close as he took a seat in the break room he had just learned about. It was small and filled with a few couches and comfortable chairs. It was exactly what he had needed after being on his feet all day.

Taehyung leaned his head back against the couch as he closed his eyes. He just needed to sit down for a little while before he got in his car and drove… he wasn’t planning on staying long. His muscles relaxed as he moved his right arm to rest on the arm rest next to him. The sounds of the drink machines around him didn’t even bother him as he took a deep breath. Laying there made him feel like he had never gotten to lay down in his life.

He could have fallen asleep if the door hadn’t opened and closed behind the person who dared interrupt his moment of serenity. He didn’t move except for opening his eyes to see who it was. It was a nurse he hadn’t met just yet, and he brought himself to sit up. She looked surprised to see him sitting there, and her eyes made him a little unsettled.

She was a little too familiar to his heart, and he dreaded to find out why. His heart once more was trying to talk to his brain, but something was warding it off. Her appearance was excruciatingly familiar, and his brain couldn’t figure out why. Did he know her name? Maybe they had met once throughout the past few years of his life.

It couldn’t have been who he was afraid it was. She was studying to be a doctor, not a nurse.

She took a few steps forward as their eyes stayed locked together. It was obvious that she knew him, but how did he know her?

“Taehyung…” she whispered as his heart leapt to his throat. She sounded just like he remembered… but how did he remember? Who is she?

His heart finally broke through when she conjured up a smile to send his way. His face heated up and he felt bashful just like in high school. Every moment he had ever spent with her flashed through him all in the course of a single moment, but he didn’t mind. Things were different now. He couldn’t even remember why he had shut her out in the first place.

“Y/N,” her name left his lips naturally as she moved to sit next to him. She seemed incredibly happy to see him, but she hid it well. Her eyes were lit up with all the excitement he had missed seeing as her hand dared to land on top of his.

“It’s been a while, huh? I guess you can tell that I kinda changed around,” she continued to smile as he could hear the maturity in her words. Her voice had grown just a little deeper, and her determined and focused attitude was stronger than he had ever seen it. Her bashfulness was almost nonexistent in that moment, like she had transferred those traits to him for the moment.

“You’re a nurse?” he asked as she just giggled. He didn’t know what else to say to her as she took a deep breath. She didn’t seem to have any sour feelings toward him which was more than comforting to him as she scooted closer. Her knees were pressed against his thigh as she excitedly bounced the couch a little bit.

“I switched to nursing classes after we quit talking. It just felt like a better fit for me, and God was I right,” her smile leaked onto his face as they shared a few laughs together. “You were nice to not crush my dreams early on.”

She continued smiling, but Taehyung felt his smile fade away. Did he just misunderstand her? Surely it wasn’t him that lead her to that decision. It didn’t take her long to notice his mood shift as she decided to elaborate.

“Going through school without you by my side just felt wrong. I felt like if I had to rely on you to be by my side all the time, I wasn’t going to make it much further.” Any tension her previous words had caused were chased away by her new words. His heart was back to beating happily as he moved his other hand to grab hers.

She looked down at their hands as Taehyung was searching for the right words to say. He wanted to apologize to her, explain to her all his behaviors, but she didn’t seem to have any ill feelings toward him. Her smile was just as bright as their school days, and even more so when his hand reached to cradle her face.

There was no doubt that she was his motivation to finish school. The underlying feeling of possibly getting to see her again in a fairy tale universe was how he survived the long and hard journey. It was his best bet to find her again, and here she was. All the wrongdoings he had on his shoulders didn’t matter; his frustrations, fears, and angers were secondary. Fate didn’t seem to mind that he had tried to push her away at one point in time, because she was real and just like he remembered her.

She moved her eyes to look into his as the word dimmed around them. All the outside noises were silenced as he stared into the eyes that he tried so hard to forget all those years ago. He was fooling himself to think that he could ever truly forget her.

He tried to will himself to pull away from her, but as she moved closer to him, his brain went blank. Her nose was pressed against his own with caution as she continued to look into his eyes. She was almost asking for permission as she put her free hand on his shoulder. Time started moving at a slower pace as his hand that was holding her’s let go, only to be placed on her hip. He had never gotten to feel her like he was right now, and knowing what he had been missing out on was driving his senses crazy. How had he lasted this long without her?

She was the one to lean all the way in as Taehyung felt his excitement levels skyrocket. His arm on her hip pushed her to sit in his lap as she giggled against his lips. Her lips were just as soft as they looked, and he could even smell the blueberry chapstick that she used to wear even back then. He could picture her pulling the stick out of her pocket and applying it religiously. He had made a point to tease her about it when he would see her do it.

Now that he was up close and personal with the smell of the chapstick, he definitely didn’t mind. The smell just added to his memories of her, and her incredibly captivating kisses were definitely the best one he now had. Her careful movements and soft touches were enough to drive him to want even more.

Her free hand had moved to his collarbone as her other moved to run through his hair. Her fingers gently brushed through his locks as a shiver ran down his spine in a rather violent movement. Her lips didn’t fail to turn up into a smile at the motion as she angled her head to deepen the kiss.

His movements became slightly more exaggerated as their lips clashed together in a beautiful fashion. He had taken to nibbling at her bottom lip when he noticed her shiver as he tried it the first time. Her bottom lip became his new obsession as he kissed her, making sure that her bottom lip was the one he was capturing. She seemed to notice as she tried to angle the kiss differently, but he was quick to change it back.

They could have easily sat there and kissed all night in the middle of the hospital break room, but some footsteps were quick to bring them back to reality. The footsteps continued on down the hallway, not even stepping into the break room, but she had already pulled away and jumped off just in case.

The following silence was surprisingly comfortable as Taehyung felt his phone going off in his pocket. He had just received a text from Jungkook asking about going for drinks in a few minutes. Taehyung was quick to decline as she didn’t fail to take a peek at his messages.

“I accidentally ended up deleting your number,” Taehyung had been surprised that those words weren’t coming from him as he looked to her, “I can’t tell you how many times I regretted not memorizing your number after I deleted it. The only thing I had to keep my hopes up about you was working together.”

Taehyung smiled and took a deep breath as he drank her in. It felt too much like a dream to be real, and if he was dreaming, he wanted to remember every feature on her face.

He looked back down at his phone as he opened his contacts and clicked on ‘new contact.’ She raised her eyebrows as he handed her his phone and let out a soft laugh. “I kind of did the same thing as you.”

A knowing smile flew on her face as she typed in her number and her name. Before she gave it back to him, she opened up the messages and pulled up her contact to send a new message. Without typing anything, she handed his phone back to him and pulled her phone out.

“Type whatever you want and send it so that I can save your number,” she spoke as Taehyung immediately started typing. It was only a matter of seconds before he sent the text and it appeared on the phone in her hand. Her smile didn’t falter as she looked at her screen, seeing the number that she had cried over not remembering. Her eyes moved to read the message as Taehyung reached over and grabbed her hand, lacing their fingers together.

02-312-XXXX I missed you.

I’m so tired omg. Gotta get back to writing because I’m on a roll xD

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

-Admin Jinnie

Fanfiction Masterlist

Updated as of 2/4/18 Requests are open! But I might deny a request if I find it hard to write. All requests I will at least attempt!

Personal Favorites- ➳ Old Garbage- ⌦ Angst/Drama- ✞ Fluff- ♡ Mature- ✗ Complete- ✦ Unfinished- ✧

Spoiler Alert- this blog doesn’t write smut, sorry! (Implied is as far as I go~)

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-Admins Jinnie and Taetae

Voicemail (Jungkook x Reader)

A/N: I actually had this finished a long time ago and hated it so much that I didn’t want to post it. Turns out it was totally fine when I read over it months later, so here it is! xD I promise it isn’t the trash that I thought it was before lol

Summary: “Bye Jungkook…”I hesitated to end the call as I saw the timer continue along. I wanted to finish it already, but my mouth was dying to say something else.It was all over, anyway… so why not just leave it out in the open? “I love you,” I spoke with a slightly shaky voice. I didn’t give myself any time to think about what I had just said as I pressed the end button and left my phone in front of me.

6.4k words | angst ✞ | fluff ♡ | slight mature themes ✗

⇨ Masterlist ⇦ 

“Hey Jungkook,” I took a deep breath as I looked at my phone in front of me. The picture on Jungkook’s contact was staring at me as I felt my confidence dwindling. I couldn’t stop now. I’d already started talking. “I know I haven’t been returning your calls, and I’m sorry… I just have been really busy and didn’t have time to really talk.”

All my words were full of it and I wouldn’t be surprised if he could tell. I’d been anything but busy the past few weeks. I had no desire to talk to him. I even deliberately chose a bad time to call him, knowing he wouldn’t answer. I didn’t want to have to face the reality of the situation.

I still couldn’t face the reality of the situation.

His lips were on mine in an instant and he was pushing me into the wall behind me as I felt my eyes widen. It was no secret that he was drunk, but I didn’t think he was that drunk...

I pushed him off and looked at him as he just continued to stare at me with heavy lidded eyes. He wasn’t in his right mind and I couldn’t let any mistakes happen. It could ruin us for him pull anything, whether he was drunk or not.

“Y/N…” he called as a shiver ran down my spine. My name on his lips sounded so… right. I was weak to his voice, but his hushed and eager voice was killing me.

“Jungkook,” I tried to stay calm, but his breath on my skin was driving me crazy. The look in his eyes was so desperate, and my resolve was floating away.

“Y/N, I need this,” he slurred as my heart broke in half, “I need you to do this for me.”

I knew what it would mean if I did it. It would cost our friendship for me to give into the temptation. To him, it would just be another hook up; another check on his list. He wouldn’t think anything of it the next morning.

I, however, would remember every touch, every kiss, every moan… it would all haunt me until I drove myself absolutely insane. I knew exactly what it meant if I let him continue with me; if I let him take me into a bedroom and finish what he had started.

“Jungkook,” I tried to sound strong, but my voice was so incredibly weak. It was pitiful and soft, but that seemed to be a good sign in Jungkook’s book. He didn’t know what this would do to me…

I tried to push him completely off of me, but the moment I moved my hands to his chest to move him away, he leaned in again and captured my lips. His sudden kiss knocked the breath out of me as my hands grabbed onto his shirt desperately. I pulled him closer to me as I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I moved my hands to his shoulders keeping him as close to me as possible.

His lips were sloppily kissing mine as I kissed him in return. I could feel how needy he was as he licked my lips and pressed me hard against the wall he had pinned me against. I didn’t put up a fight as his tongue took over my mouth, moving around my tongue before he pulled away to take a quick breath.

“Can I?”

His eyes were staring into mine with such need and desperation. He looked so helpless, and I couldn’t help but wonder what got him to feel this way.

I just nodded before I had enough time to let my regret pull me out of it. I kept telling myself that I could back out at any moment as long as he didn’t pull me into a room…

But as the door shut behind the two of us and as Jungkook pinned me against the wall, I knew there was no going back. His hips were grinding mine as I moaned and held him against me. His mouth was still kissing mine as passionately as before, but his mind was elsewhere.

He didn’t even seem to notice my tears as he reached under my clothes and began caressing my stomach. He would never understand how long I had waited for a moment like this…

And he also had no idea how much it hurt that he only wanted me for a rebound.

“I know it’s been about three weeks and I just wanted to call and tell you that I’m doing just fine. I’m sure Jimin’s told you since I see him every day in class… He talks a lot, you know? He asks me for my life story, but I only tell him so much since I know he has gossip problems.”

I smiled as I talked into my phone, feeling myself reflect on the friend I had just mentioned. Jimin had introduced us when he invited me and a few of his other friends to go bowling. Jungkook had been flirting with two girls when I first met him, and I automatically labeled him as a guy I shouldn’t go near.

Later that night after I finished talking to Hoseok, one of Jimin and I’s other classmates, I ran back into Jungkook. He was just standing outside the hallway to the bathroom, looking into the arcade across the hall.

I knew I shouldn’t say anything to him. I should have just left him alone, but his expression made me feel pity on him.

“Did all the girls leave?” I joked as his eyes moved to look at me. He seemed slightly startled, but he recovered very quickly. I was waiting for some obnoxious pick up line to be thrown my way, but his words were tame.

“No,” he shook his head before leaning it against the wall. His eyes still stayed on mine as I got a good look at them. “They were boring, actually. One of them was way too eager. She asked me if I would take her to the bathroom later tonight.”

He let out a small laugh as I laughed along with him, “Good God, what a whore.”

“I’ll say,” he pushed himself off the wall as he seemed to get a little excited, “I even went up to bowl like everyone else and she started cheering really loudly. After about four frames, I quit so she would shut up.”

“No way,” I laughed as I looked toward the bowling alley, “I was wondering what all the noise was about. I didn’t think it was all over you.”

He nodded and looked in the same direction that I did, “I’m all for attention, but that was too much for me.”

I turned back to him while letting out a little laugh, and when my eyes met his once more, time seemed to stop.

Looking back on it, the time only stopped for me. To him, I was just another girl. At least in that moment I was.

“I’m Jungkook, by the way,” he held out his hand as his flirty smile appeared back on his face. I just looked down at his hand and then back up at him. Without taking his hand, I pushed myself off of the wall and started walking toward my original destination, the bathroom.

“Y/N,” I called after him, “I’ll see you around.”

And with that, Jungkook and I became fast friends. He never really hit on me, even in the beginning; he just treated me like a normal human being. I really enjoyed it at first, but somewhere along the way, my opinion changed.

It started to become a bad thing that he never flirted with me.

“I don’t have much time left before it times me out, so I’ll stop here,” I spoke as I took a deep breath. I shivered as I thought back to that night for a brief moment, feeling the regret in the pit of my stomach. I told myself to never let it happen unless he loved me like I did him. I swore to myself that I would be strong.

“Bye Jungkook…”

I hesitated to end the call as I saw the timer continue along. I wanted to finish it already, but my mouth was dying to say something else.

It was all over, anyway… so why not just leave it out in the open?

“I love you,” I spoke with a slightly shaky voice. I didn’t give myself any time to think about what I had just said as I pressed the end button and left my phone in front of me.

::

I hadn’t expected a call or anything after I left the voicemail. I didn’t really even expect to see him again after I left that simple, yet complicated message.

It felt like it had been an eternity since I had seen him in the flesh, and it didn’t help that my last memory of seeing him was laying next to him in bed, wanting more than anything to erase what I had let happen.

“Y/N,” I looked up from my book and spotted Jimin sitting in front of me. I had forgotten that we were supposed to be studying for our Biology final next week. I honestly couldn’t keep my head straight, and I could tell Jimin’s patience was dwindling. “Are you even listening?”

“No,” I didn’t hesitate to answer. Jimin had no idea what had happened between Jungkook and I nearly a month ago. He didn’t know about my feelings, he didn’t know about that night, and he certainly didn’t know about the voicemail. If anyone were to tell him what happened, it would be Jungkook. I had no desire to get any pity looks from Jimin for the rest of my pitiful days.

“Could you at least sound a little sorry?” he seemed to be losing his patience with me. We’d been trying to study for the past hour, but thanks to me, we’ve gotten nowhere.

“I am sorry,” I spoke, but I didn’t sound genuine. I honestly did mean it, but I didn’t have the will to make it sound that way.

Jimin’s annoyance slightly grew, but I also saw a hint of pity in his eyes. That was the exact look I had been trying to avoid…

“Okay, what’s going on?” He asked, closing my text book that I had been blankly staring at, “You’ve been acting strange for so long. I was hoping it would wear off over a week or two, but you’re still in this… sulking state.”

I looked down at the textbook cover and sighed, tracing the animal on the front cover, “It’s not a big deal. I’m just stressed from all these exams, and merely looking at a textbook wears me out-”

“Y/N,” Jimin stopped me as I looked up at him. He wasn’t buying any of it, but I didn’t know why. Jimin wasn’t normally so intuitive that he could see through me that easily. Was I getting really bad at hiding it? I kept it up for so long that it became almost a second nature.

Though, the more I thought about not having heard a word from Jungkook in the past few days, the more upset I got. Thinking about him; about that voicemail… that was the only explanation as to why I couldn’t keep this up any longer. My body simply couldn’t, or just didn’t want to, keep up with my mind any longer.

“Y/N, I know something’s wrong,” he leaned forward and grabbed my chin. He moved my head so that I was looking him in the eye, and all my barriers felt like breaking, “I… I uh…”

Jimin’s hesitance made my stomach ache. I almost didn’t want to know what he was going to say. Did he know? Surely he didn’t know everything…

“I talked to Jungkook about you today.”

My heart felt like a needle was being plunged into it at his words. He talked to Jungkook. I couldn’t help but feel incredibly jealous over such a simple action. Just knowing that he had spoken to the person who was killing me on the inside was enough to knock the breath out of me.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked with a soft voice. His eyes were filled with all the worry and concern that I wanted to see in Jungkook. I wanted to know if he would be concerned for me like Jimin was in this moment.

“I didn’t want to be pitied,” I answered, but it wasn’t the complete truth. The complete truth was that I didn’t want to say the reality of the situation. I didn’t want it to seem even more real than it already was. “I didn’t want you to see me as weak as I feel.”

Jimin grabbed my hand and squeezed it, “Hey… You should really talk to him. It’ll make the both of you feel so much better.”

“No,” I took my hand out of his grip and shook my head, “God, no. I can’t handle talking to him.”

“I know,” he swallowed, trying to hold my attention, “Y/N, look. You need to talk to him. He really wants to talk to you about a voicemail that you left.”

My stomach twisted and turned at the mention of my stupid mistake. I wanted more than anything to erase that stupid thing… “If he wanted to talk to me about it, he should have tried to contact me. I don’t like having to hear about what he wants through another person’s mouth when he could easily say it to me.”

“I understand,” Jimin nodded, grabbing hold of one of my hands again. I looked down at them and he pulled my pinky to point at the ceiling, “Can you promise me that you’ll at least close this out? Let this end with no questions?”

I wanted to say no just as much as I wanted to say yes. I felt like I already knew all the answers that I’d need to know…

But instead of rejecting his suggestion, I just wrapped my pinky around his and took a deep breath.

“I promise.”

::

Not even a day after our promise, Jimin was begging me to go bowling with him, Hoseok, and Taehyung. He swore that Jungkook wouldn’t be there, but even if he wasn’t going to be there, I would still feel like he was. The bowling alley was not only our first encounter, but we also liked to hang out there a good bit of the time. Jungkook and I never really even bowled, but we’d watch our friends and then run off somewhere else, like the arcade they had in the back.

“I’m glad you came!” Hoseok smiled to me as I got out of my car. He and Taehyung had just arrived together since they’re roommates, and we were still waiting on Jimin. “Jimin told me that you’re starting to get sick of this place.”

I smiled nervously as I looked at the building. I was definitely not sick of the place, I just couldn’t help but have negative feelings toward it. It was a vessel harboring all my heartache; it was the place where it all began.

“Jimin lied,” I tried to put on a genuine smile, “I’m definitely not sick of this place. This is our hang out spot, after all.”

Hoseok nodded as Taehyung finally met up with the two of us. He had taken forever getting out of the car for some reason.

The three of us were already heading inside when Jimin pulled in.

Of course, Jimin’s not the only one who pulled in.

My breath caught in my throat as I saw the all too familiar Silver Audi R5. The windows were too tinted to see inside, but I didn’t need to see inside to know exactly who was in it.

It was as if time slowed down as he parked next to Jimin’s car and got out painfully slowly. It had been nearly three weeks since the mistake, and of course he hadn’t changed a bit. His hair was parted to the right, his forehead was very, very visible, and his hair was styled the exact way it was that night.

I felt my lungs being throttled as tears were welling into my eyes. My eyes met his after he and Jimin shared a handshake, but I wasn't ready. I wasn’t ready to look him in the eyes, I wasn’t ready to breathe the same air as him.

All I could think about was how his lips were pressed against mine, about his whispers in my ear, about how incredibly vulnerable I felt in this moment.

My thoughts had put me in a whole whirlpool of emotions. All I could see was what happened that night. I couldn’t get it out of my head. I couldn’t let it go like I wished I could.

And I had no one to blame but myself.

Once my mind came back to reality, I realized everyone was already heading inside.

Well, everyone except Jungkook who was standing right in front of me. He was close enough to touch, and I wanted nothing more than to reach out and touch him.

My eyes met his as my tears finally began spilling out. He knew what lead me to be this way, and I wasn’t going to bother hiding it. Even if I wanted to hide it, I didn’t have the strength to. I was completely and utterly pitiful.

“Y/N…” he moved his hand to my cheek to wipe away the tears that were falling, and I didn’t back away. I couldn’t move away from him when all I wanted to do was jump into his arms and kiss him like I’d gone mad.

I refused to meet his eyes as his hand was rested on my cheek. He seemed to be perfectly sober, but I was irrationally terrified that it would happen again, and I would be left in the dust once more.

“I don’t even know where to begin,” he took a deep breath. It comforted me a little bit to see him just as shaky as I was, “I guess I should start with an apology… I know I’ve texted you to apologize several times, but that’s never good enough. I would hate myself forever if I didn’t apologize properly to you.”

I knew he was meaning to be sweet, but his words caused panic to rise in my throat. He’s apologizing for that night, but what if he apologizes for not being able to feel the same way about me? What if he apologizes about leading me on?

More tears slipped from my eyes, and Jungkook was quick to catch them.

“I’m sorry, Y/N… I…” He stopped short when I moved my face out of his hold. I looked down to hide the excruciating heartbreak that awaited me.

“I’m mostly sorry for waiting so long to respond to you. I feel like a garbage person for not ever calling you back or even texting you. I just… I didn’t know how to feel at first.”

I let out a very unbecoming sob as I turned away from him. I hated this. I hated being such a mess of emotions. The worst part was that Jungkook wouldn’t just leave me to cry alone. He didn’t get the hint that I didn't want to know. I didn’t want the confirmation that Jimin thought I needed. It just made it hurt even more than it should have.

“Y/N…” he called in a gentle voice, placing his hand on mine. I flinched away, but he was relentless, “Y/N, I should have never taken advantage of you. I will never be able to forgive myself for that.”

It was silent as Jungkook gently and carefully wrapped his arms around my waist. I felt my heart jump, only to ache seconds later. I didn’t fight him as he pulled me against him in a back hug. He buried his head in my shoulder and took a deep breath as I tried to wipe away some of my tears.

“I didn’t realize that you loved me,” he sounded like he was on the verge of tears, but I couldn’t use his reaction to gauge it. His hold on me was very shaky as I felt my right hand touch his in hopes to comfort him a little. “I didn’t realize that I love you.”

I continued to hold his hand as my brain processed his words. My eyes slowly began widening as he hugged me even tighter against him. It was like he was afraid that I would push him away. I would have been crazy to push him away from me after hearing the words I never thought he’d say.

Jungkook is the player type, even after we were friends he was a flirt. He was all over different kinds of girls, and we even used to bet on if he could get a girl’s number or not.

Seeing him like this was not only confusing to my heart, but also to my brain. It didn’t logically make sense for him to be so vulnerable in this situation. It didn’t make sense for him to be in love with me…

I turned around in his arms as he lifted his head up from my shoulder. I looked in his eyes for any lies, any jokes, any bets he might’ve made on the situation…

But his were as honest and genuine as my feelings are for him. My eyes stayed glued to his as he held me against him. Our lips had barely any distance between them, and Jungkook didn’t waste any time closing that gap.

This kiss was worlds different than the other night; it was sweet, soft, and genuine. I could feel his affection with his soft touches and his careful movements. His lips were softly encircled around mine, and I felt myself leaning even more into him. He brushed his fingers through my hair so softly as a shiver ran down my spine.

My right hand found itself grabbing at the front of his shirt, pulling his mouth even more against mine. His gentle kisses were causing more frustration than happiness the longer they went on, but as I pulled him even more into me, he responded very quickly.

His hands stayed on the small of my back as my free hand buried into his hair. Our lips were being roughly pressed together, and it wasn’t long before his tongue slipped into my mouth. Even having a heated kiss like this, it felt nothing like the other night. It felt like a real, sincere kiss.

Our lips parted a few seconds as my eyes fluttered open to meet his. I almost completely forgot about how upset I had been only five minutes earlier just by looking into his eyes.

They were the same eyes I had looked into since we met, but in this moment, it was different. I could see all the feelings I thought I would never see in him.

“I wish I talked to you sooner,” he swallowed as I was brought back to reality, “but I needed time to figure out my feelings. That night three weeks ago was confusing to me just like it was to you. I didn’t know what compelled me to do what I did…”

I took a deep breath and sent him a smile. It was probably my first real smile in three weeks.

“I’m just glad this is all sorted out,” I reached up and touched his face as I felt my heart swell. This was like a dream come true, “I missed you so, so much. I didn’t realize just how in love I am until I quit talking to you.”

Without really saying much more, the two of us started to head inside. Jimin, Hoseok, and Taehyung had all started playing a game already, and Jimin immediately noticed us when we walked inside.

“Thank God you two have sorted it out,” Jimin sighed and sent me a soft smile, “I told you that you would feel better after talking to him.”

“Don’t rub it in,” I warned, but I was too happy to be truly annoyed at Jimin. Jungkook’s hand held mine in such a sure way that I knew this could last. I had no fears about us.

I looked over at him as Jimin went up to bowl, and he was already looking at me. We exchanged soft smiles as he placed a kiss on my forehead. I didn’t know that Jungkook could be such a soft and loving boyfriend…

Boyfriend… We didn’t actually talk about being official, did we?

With one more glance in his direction, I didn’t need to. It was silently agreed upon, and I was fine with that.

“I think you two should play,” Hoseok offered as they finished the final frame, “We have six spots and there are five of us.”

I was about to decline, but Jungkook beat me, “Sure. I haven’t played in a while.”

Jungkook got up to bowl as I just watched him and every move he made. I started thinking back to the night we met and how there was one desperate girl cheering for him. I couldn’t help but relate to that girl just a little bit as I got the urge to cheer for his strike. I forgot how good Jungkook is at the game. It made me wonder why he quit playing when we’d go.

I couldn’t help but ask him as we ran off to get some food, “Hey… why did you stop playing when we’d come bowling?”

He looked over at me as he folded the receipt in his hand. A faint smile appeared on his face right before our number was called. Jungkook was quick to grab the tray, and I grabbed the drink off of it. I was quick to take a sip of it as Jungkook glanced down at me.

“Why?” he asked as I swallowed the soda that was in my mouth.

“I’m just curious. You’re really good at bowling, and you seem to enjoy it.” I slowed him down as I saw Jimin get a Spare.

He shrugged, but before I started to get annoyed at his silence, he leaned down and whispered in my ear.

“I liked talking to you a whole lot more.”

::

A/N: That wasn’t so bad was it? c;

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-Admin Jinnie

loved chp 5!! so great and so long thank u for spending so much time working hard on it!!! ur work is not unnoticed or unappreciated!!

Thank you!!! you guys are literally the best! x3 Messages like this mean more to me than you’d think!

Out Of My Mind (Namjoon x OC)

Double Upload! Woo! Fun fact- This is a fic inspired by a situation mentioned in one of my other oneshots. I loved the idea so much that I finished this fic before the one that inspired it lol

Summary: He hated to abuse her kindness like he was, but he couldn’t bring himself to change anything. It would hurt more people to change his ways than it would to keep them. Maybe.

Bless Day6 for this song that coincidentally goes along with this story!

Words: 2,500+ Genre: angst and fluff, my specialty lol

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It wasn’t too long before Namjoon pulled up to the apartment that he knew almost better than his own. He took a deep breath as he spotted movement toward the front doors of the building. He could tell her apart from a mile away.

He turned his car off and hurried out of it before she got out of his sight. She was nearly in the building when he built up the courage to shout her name out.

“Miyoung! Wait up!”

She turned around, but she didn’t necessarily look shocked. She was almost expecting to see him show up tonight. He had been staying the night almost every other night at this point.

“Namjoon,” she sent him a soft smile that was almost like a whisper. Her quiet voice took over his mind as he took another deep breath. He hated to abuse her kindness like he was, but he couldn’t bring himself to change anything. It would hurt more people to change his ways than it would to keep them.

“I’m sorry,” he slightly shrugged, but she didn’t stay to listen to his apology. She’d heard it time and time again, and there was no need to hear it once more. His footsteps followed her all the way to her place as she unlocked the door. She glanced back at him for a second before stepping inside, holding the door open for him.

“I’ll make some dinner if you’d like. I think Ryeji will be home a little early tonight,” She spoke as Namjoon slipped off his shoes. He looked over to her after shrugging his jacket off, and she sent him a soft smile. It was a smile he didn’t deserve, but she was always generous with it. He couldn’t lie that her smile could clear his head of any negative thoughts. It was the soul reason on why he should have never come.

“I’d always appreciate your food,” he spoke carefully as her eyes stayed lit up the way he liked. “But if you’re too tired to make anything, don’t force yourself.”

Miyoung took his words as a yes, and she started on her way to the kitchen, “It’ll be ready in about 30. Feel free to change and watch TV to your heart’s content.”

He wanted to walk into the kitchen and watch her cook like he always did. There was some kind of magic that she had in the kitchen, and he loved watching it. He had an excuse to keep his eyes on her for a long time, and what more could he want?

But he couldn’t do that anymore. He couldn’t do that do himself. The more he was around her, the worse things got. He shouldn’t even be here right now, but here he was.

He stared at himself in the mirror when he went to change, and his expression was just as deflated as the rest of him. He couldn’t keep this up. The more he did this, the closer Jena was to finding out.

He pushed himself away from the bathroom counter and threw the door open in frustration, but he didn’t dare let it hit the wall. Miyoung didn’t need to be anywhere near him until he calmed down a little bit.

This point is normally when he would walk into the kitchen, but Miyoung noticed him walk right on passed the doorway. He seemed to be walking into the living room, and Miyoung swallowed. Such a simple action already set her mind in a disarray as she looked back down at the food. Everything felt different, as much as she hated to admit it. He didn’t feel like his usual self. It was only a matter of time until she never saw him again.

She took a deep breath and swallowed a lump that was forming in her throat. Jena always had the upper hand. No matter what she did, he wasn’t going to leave Jena. She tried everything to win him over, but he was impenetrable.

Her thoughts wandered as her eyes stayed on the food. It didn’t matter where her eyes laid, because her mind was far gone. She couldn’t stop thinking about how he was in the other room and not in the kitchen with her.

“Namjoon,” she called once she was confident that her voice would be stable, “Do you want a drink? Coffee maybe?”

His answer didn’t come, and Miyoung felt her heart sting a little. She knew what his response would be, and unfortunately, he knew that she knew. He didn’t bother answering a question that she already knew the answer to. His answer was the same every time.

It didn’t stop her heart from aching. Even the simplest things began to hurt so much. It was a painful reminder of what was soon to come. Soon enough, she wouldn’t even be able to ask that question. It wasn’t long before he wouldn’t even show up anymore.

“Okay, I’ll get it for you,” she responded, but she didn’t move. Tears began to build up in her eyes as the TV’s volume was raised relatively louder. She took that as a sign for her to give up. She was giving up, anyway.

The food in front of her began to burn as she hurried to turn the heat down. Her arms were shaking, but she managed to save the food. If this was their last meal together, she wanted it to be great. Even if the salt from her tears made it taste a little off.

The food was finished sooner than she had hoped. Her tears were still flowing at the thoughts flooding her mind. She could barely find it in her to put the food on their separate plates. The longer he was away from her, the more desirable her bed became.

“Namjoon,” she called. Her voice sounded broken, but it was drowned out by the TV. Even if the TV was off, he wouldn’t have heard her.

She tried calling out to him again, but her voice ended up even quieter than before. She balled up her fists in frustration as her heartache grew. She might as well get used to this. Jena came first after all. She always did.

It was foolish for her to believe that his attention meant anything other than charity. To him, she was just his backup home. She was his cushion to keep him from falling when he and Jena weren’t working.

She was nothing more than his cushion, despite her hopes.

After what felt like centuries, she moved the food onto one plate for him. She was just going to hand it to him and go to bed. Their last meal was just going to have to be spent apart. She should start her heartbreak recovery as soon as possible.

She placed the pan back on the stove with the rest of the food. The longer she was around the food, the less appetizing it was. Her stomach could barely hold itself together right now, let alone digest some food.

She grabbed the plate and walked into the living room. It took all the strength left in her to put a broken smile on her face. It didn’t matter if he could see right through it. This might be the last time he sees it.

She placed the food down on the coffee table in front of him, and she felt his eyes on her. She didn’t dare look at him as she placed the water bottle that she had grabbed next to it. Her hands were shaking a lot more than she was used to.

“Sorry it took so long,” she spoke, but he could barely hear her. It didn’t help that she didn’t want to get very close to him. She wouldn’t even spare him a glance. Maybe it was for the better.

He glanced at the food that she had placed down before looking back over at her. Her eyes had rested on the TV for a few seconds, and he just watched her. He couldn’t help but study every move she made, like he was afraid he’d never see her again.

He really shouldn’t have come.

She built herself up enough to look at him as he looked her in the eyes. Her eyes told him everything he needed to know as he felt himself lose his appetite.

“I’m going to head off to bed,” she spoke, her voice breaking mid-sentence. She didn’t dare cry in front of him, so she just bowed to excuse herself. With one last look at him, she turned to walk into her room.

Namjoon couldn’t help but feel panic in his chest. His brain was confused with his actions just as much as his heart was. Jena kept popping into his mind, but as he glanced at Miyoung, he didn’t care. He couldn’t let this go on. He couldn’t cage the two of them over a girl he pitied. He’d never forgive himself if he let Jena rule his decisions.

“Miyoung,” Namjoon called as she stopped dead in her tracks. He hurried to shut off the TV as he stood up, moving closer to the girl he was hurting. He was causing her so much pain…

He knew it was time he stopped being so naive.

He rushed over to her and she turned around with tears in her eyes. Her broken expression put tears in his eyes before he had the chance to think about it. He couldn’t let this continue. She deserved to smile again. He wanted to make her smile again.

“I’m sorry,” his voice was breaking as he grabbed her hips in a desperate but gentle manor.

She dismissed his apology as her eyes got lost in his. Her mind was sending off a million alarms, but she couldn’t pull herself away from him.

He pulled her completely against him as the wind was knocked right out of her. He hadn’t ever been this close to her in all their years as friends. She had imagined this moment time and time again, but her heart still wasn’t prepared.

His nose teased hers as she reached up to wipe his tears. She didn’t know why he was crying, but she was glad she wasn’t the only one.

“I’m done,” he swallowed as he kept his eyes locked with hers. Her soft hands running along his skin made him shiver, but his tears didn’t stop, “I should have given in a long time ago.”

Not another moment was wasted as his salty lips covered hers, desperate to drink her in. He hooked his arms around her to keep her body against his. Her head tilted back slightly due to the forcefulness of his kiss. Her mind was still stuck in his eyes, even though her lids had shut ages ago.

Her desperate hands moved to his neck, running her hands through his hair at the nape. The excitement and heat of the moment had her shaking furiously, but he was doing a good job of keeping her glued to him. Her lips trembled as he changed the angle of the kiss with a light nudge of her nose. His kisses became more open as he allowed room for her to breath into the kiss. He was too hungry to let her pull away for a breath.

The wall behind her suddenly became very important to him as he hoisted her up by her thighs and lightly rammed her against the wall. A small noise left her mouth at the contact as his teeth tugged at her bottom lip. He let her feet touch the ground again, but he kept her pressed to that wall.

Her hands found the bottom of his shirt as she let her hands explore under the cloth she had imagined ripping off time and time again. Every time she had gotten a glimpse of his chest, she had hungered for a chance to touch it. The image of him emerging from the gym swimming pool came to mind as her cheeks rivaled the temperature of the sun. His built body felt better than she had ever imagined it feeling. Every muscle seemed to be at work as he kissed her, and his tongue was searching for an opportunity to dance around hers.

As her hands explored, he tried his best to keep his hands tame. His fingers pressed into her hips to keep them rooted to their spot, and he was doing well so far with self control.

It was when she let out a small sob that he pulled away and looked at her with a worried and broken expression. What had he just done? Did she just want him to leave her alone? Would she rather him have let her go?

“M-Miyoung?” his voice was hoarse from the heat of the kiss as it took everything in him to not kiss her tears away. He opted for his thumbs to clear them off, and she seemed to lean into his large hand. He noticed it almost swallowed her face now that he was able to hold her this close.

“I-I just,” she swallowed and let out a few hiccups, “I’m just so happy, but so confused.”

A small smile was placed on his face as he pulled her into a hug. She let out all the pent up tears as he moved her over to the couch.

“Take your time to calm down,” he whispered into her hair as she let out a heartbreaking sob, “I’m not going anywhere. I never really was.”

She gripped his shirt in a desperate hold, but she never said anything. His presence and comforting words were doing wonders, but her tears were unlimited. She had held them in for so long.

“N-Namjoon,” she sniffed and buried her face into his neck as his heart began racing all over again. “I love you so much…”

He placed a soft kiss on her head before running a hand up and down her back for comfort, “I know… I love you, too. I always have.”

She wanted to scream and cry at him for putting her through so much, but she couldn’t do it. No matter what kind of hell she was put through, she would do it all once more to be held like this again.

“Idiot,” was all she was able to get out as a small smile broke through on her face. He could feel the smile against his neck, so he pulled her away to look her in the eyes. His lips found her fresh tears as he kissed them away.

“The biggest idiot,” he softly corrected as her grip on his shirt tightened once more. Her eyes couldn’t believe the fond look in his eyes. She had seen that look so many times, but not once had she thought it was real.

She couldn’t help but pull him to her again, letting her heart swell. Despite the hell she went through, he was worth the wait.

AHSKAJHDAEHFOW THIS WAS SO DEPRESSING BUT YET CUTE OML I absolutely loved writing this, so much so that I wrote it all in one sitting and it is now so freaking late. Props to Day6 for the song that I listened to while writing this. I can’t quit listening to it~ cx

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-Admin Jinnie