Jungkook Scenarios - Tumblr Posts

too young || six

summary: you and jungkook meet up after a surprise delivery happens at the school

word count: 2,018

genre:  parent!au, single dad!jungkook angst

one || two || three || four || five || six

When you thought about your first heartbreak, you’d thought you would be nonstop sobbing in your bed, being surrounded by empty jars of melted ice cream pints and sad movies. You thought that despite the distance, your mom would make the trip and drive all the way to see you, rub your back in small comforting circles and take care of you as if you were a sick child. You thought that everything would hurt so much that you wouldn’t even want to move. 

The only problem? Your first heartbreak didn’t feel like that at all. 

It was all practically numb.

You didn’t fall apart when you did something that reminded you of him. 

You didn’t start breaking down when you watched him pick up Jules and didn’t bother to come in to your office to say hi to you. 

You didn’t crumble to pieces when you had no notifications on your phone from him.

You lived your life normally again just without Jungkook and Jules. 

Alone.

There were no more screams or echoes of noise from Jules and her cousins when you peacefully relaxed, there was no more idle music playing in background as you did your work and there were no more soft breaths and snores next to you in your bed. 

Your mom called you every night on the phone, checking up on you. It was like she wanted you to cry and to feel some pain, just so she could go down there and be there for you. But you told her that you were fine and will deal with whatever negative feelings when they come. 

Life went on whether you liked it or not. 

Three weeks after the break up, at the end of March, there was a familiar knock on your office door after the last school bell rang. You haven’t talked to Jules since the night she found you looking at pictures of her mom, and you really hope it wasn’t awkward when you talk to her. 

It’s the first time you see Jules’s hair was down, strands of her hair going in every direction. She looks like a mess. Tears streamed down her face as she ran towards you, hugging your legs. “Can you help me?” 

“What’s wrong, Sweetie?” 

“I lost Jungkook’s mp3 player,” she cried, rubbing her face on your black dress pants to wipe her tears. “He’s going to kill me!” 

“It’s okay, Jules.” Bending down to comfort her, you wipe her face and stroke her hair. You’ve never seen her this sad, and it made your heart sink. “I’m sure he’ll understand. Things like this happen all the time. It’s okay.” 

She shook her head. “Auntie Moon Soo is coming soon, and I can’t leave without the mp3 player. I can’t.” 

“Why don’t we ask her to come look for it with you?” You asked softly. “That way 3 people are looking for it.” 

Namjoon’s wife, Moon Soo comes out of her van, she’s surprised to see you standing next to Jules. She doesn’t say anything to you at first and tries to reassure Jules that’ll be alright, that they will find it before Jungkook goes home tonight.

When it’s been over 30 minutes, retracing Jule’s steps from her locker to the gym to the playground, she goes to the bathroom, making you and Moon Soo wait outside for her. 

“I’m sorry we had to meet like this in this circumstance,” she said, offering a kind smile. “I heard a lot of great things about you, and I’m sorry things didn’t go well at the dinner with the girls.”

You hear Jules flush the toilet. “It is what it is.” 

“I know what it was like,” she said. “They made it seem like I wasn’t good enough for Joon, and we took a small break too. But at the end of the day, it’s about how you feel about Jungkook and Jules that matters more than their opinions, especially if they brought up Sarah.” 

“I’m almost done!” Jules shouted, turning on the sink. 

“But that doesn’t change the way Jungkook feels about Sarah.” Tears were forming in your eyes, and you bit your lip to hold them back. “But I’m glad you and Namjoon were able to overcome it.” 

“It’s been like what, almost a month? Jules knows Jungkook can easily buy her a new mp3 player, or even a phone, anything she wants, honestly. But think about it...I’m sure she misses you and is using this as an opportunity to spend time with you again.” 

“Can we check out my classroom?” Jules finally opened the door, getting out of the restroom. 

The three of you walk quietly over to her class where she looked through every desk (without touching their things) and looked over to the place where she reads books in the class. She lifted the bean bag in the corner of the room, revealing what she has been looking for this whole time. “Yay!” 

“See, everything is okay.” Moon soo smiled. “Are you ready to go, Jules?” 

She nodded, but then stared at you with her piercing eyes. “Is this going to be the last time you’re going to talk to me?” 

“Of course not, Jules.” You took a breath. “I’m here for you always.” 

“I have to tell you something.” But before she could tell you, she pointed at Moon Soo. “Why didn’t you go to the bathroom when we went, Auntie?” 

Moon Soo raised her eyebrows, then looked down at what Jules was pointing at. She then began holding on to her stomach with a pained look. “My water just broke.”

_______

“Hey!” Namjoon exclaimed, rushing through the hospital doors. Before he goes to Moon Soo’s room, he went towards your direction as you waited outside the room with Jules. “Thank you so much for bringing her here safely and for being there for her at that time. I seriously cannot thank you enough.”

“No worries,” you let out. “I’m glad I was there.” 

He’s about to say something, but you hear Moon Soo scream Namjoon’s name, making him go into the room as quickly as he can. 

Your phone in your blazer buzzed. 

[seokjin]

the whole fam is coming in about 10 minutes 

thank you for taking care of jules

will be there soon and you can leave

“Are you leaving when they come?” Jules asked as she looked down at your phone screen, seeing the texts from. “You’re not going to stay to see the babies?” 

“I don’t know yet.” You lied, knowing you were going to leave once someone is here able to take care and watch over Jules. As much as you wanted to see the twins, you didn’t want to see some specific people. You were doing fine right now in your life and didn’t want to ruin that if you saw Jungkook or some of the girls. “I have a lot of work to do still, Sweetheart.” 

“Will you see the babies with me on different day then?” 

“I hope so.” You couldn’t make an empty promise to her. “Are you excited to have more cousins?” 

She nodded. “I like my small family, but sometimes, I hate being alone. The cousins help me forget that I can’t have any brothers or sisters.”

You sighed, wrapping your arm around Jules. “Never forget that you will always have your family, your uncles, aunts and cousins to support you. They will always be there.”

“Will you?” She asked, looking up at you, once again, her eyes were so piercing.

“I hope so.” You rubbed her back in small circles. 

“I heard what Auntie said when I was in the bathroom,” she said. “I missed you, but I had to find this mp3 player. Jungkook’s new song is on here. I’m always the first to listen, and I didn’t want to lose this song.” 

“That’s good you found it then.” 

She’s about to tell you more, her mouth is slightly opened, but she doesn’t say anything more and started to stare in the direction behind you. Letting go of her, you turned behind, seeing Jungkook walking towards you two. 

He paused, not expecting to see you here, but then continued to walk forward as you looked away, not wanting to meet his eyes. “Are you okay?” 

“I’m hungry,” Jules answered with a pouty look on her face.

He laughed, taking his leather wallet out of his back pocket. He hands her a couple dollar bills, telling her to get something for the three of them from the vending machine. “Go crazy.” 

“You know I will,” she joked. 

There’s awkward silence in the air now, with Jules gone. Jungkook then sat down in the empty chair beside you, with his head turned to you as you looked down at your hands in your lap. He doesn’t know where to start and what words to say. How ironic, coming from a songwriter. “Hey.”

“Hi.” 

“Did you eat yet?” He asked. 

“Nope,” you replied, still not looking at him. “Did you?”

“Not yet.”

“I should get going.” You finally took the first step, grabbing your purse off the ground. 

Before you could take another step, Jungkook reached forward and grabbed your wrist, stopping your movement. “I never loved her, you know.” 

You wanted to shake him off, go on your own way, but you kept standing in front of him, facing away from him. “What?” 

He sighed, wishing he could look you in the eyes. “I never answered you that day because I was too scared to admit it out loud. I never got to tell her either, and I knew she loved me. The thing was I only thought of her as a sister, someone I had to protect. And I was afraid that if I actually told someone that I didn’t love her before she got the chance to hear it from me, I would somehow hurt her even though she’s gone.” 

“Jungkook,” You said this name, but he kept talking.

“I know that’s no excuse, but I am so sorry. I never wanted you to feel like that, and I should have just told you. No one has been competing with you.” He let go of your hand and stood up. “I don’t want you to be Sarah because I love you for who you are. I want you for who you are. My life feels incomplete without you.”

Finally turning around, you stared at Jungkook. It’s the first time finally looking at him up close in three weeks, and he looked like death. Dark circles were under his eyes, his hair was a mess. You could tell Jungkook felt too much.

And he did. For the last three weeks, he got up every morning, trying to ignore the pain he was feeling in his heart. He tried to continue his life like everything was okay, but all he kept thinking about was you. He wanted you to see you when he picked Jules up from school. He wanted to hear you laugh when he watched a movie with Jules. He wanted to you next to him when he was alone on Wednesdays. He wanted to hear you cheer for Jules when he watched her soccer games. He just wanted you. 

With all the pain he had been feeling, he’s been trying to figure out his feelings and all the words he wanted to say to you that night, and now that he was finally letting all of it go, he was crying right in front of you.

“You saw me more than Jule’s guardian. I felt like you were the first person to honestly see me for me. I want to live spending more time with you, watching Jules’s games, hearing all your different opinions and views than mine. And I am so sorry that I damaged us in the process.”

“Hey, Y/N!” Namjoon rushed out of the room. His jaw dropped once he saw you and Jungkook together, looking all sad. Still, his smile on his face reappeared as he asked, “Do you guys want to see the babies?” 

____ 

hi this is so long overdue i apologize, i’ve honestly been stuck :( hope you all have a good day and enjoy permission to dance<33 lowkey not proofread either:/

don’t know if we can be friends || jjk

– summary: you fall in love with jeongguk, the boy who showed you the sun on a bleak, rainy day, but you weren’t sure if he wanted you. 

– genre: high school, best friends to strangers to lovers, post (friendship) break up au. fluff & angst – warning: mentions of drugs, drinking, lots of clichés, lots of pining, jeongguk acts like an idiot, small mention(s) of baseball and harry potter (which i do not own), attempts of being funny.

– word count: 15,068

Everyone has that one moment in their life where they wish they could go back in time and change what they did, hoping for a better outcome and different path to go on. 

Sure, growing up, you had lots of regrets and your fair share of embarrassing moments you wish you could erase out of everyone’s head, including your own, like the the time you threw up all over your best friend, Alaina’s back during the third grade spelling bee or the time you ripped your white jeans when you tried doing a cool figure skating move, humiliating yourself in front of the whole junior high school. 

But despite that, you wish you could go back and tell your past self to take driver’s education as early as you can with your classmates instead of waiting to take it during your first year of high school filled with random strangers. 

Maybe then you wouldn’t have tripped over your white shoelaces and land into Jeon Jeongguk’s lap in front of everyone.

It definitely wasn’t one of the most embarrassing moments of your life, but your cheeks turn red when you heard the whole class laugh at the fact you were sitting on a younger guy’s lap. 

Perhaps, it would have been better to take driver’s education earlier and not meet Jeon Jeongguk. 

Even though you’ve never had a proper conversation with Jeon Jeongguk, you know who he is. His family has been in this town for many generations, giving them a name and legacy for themselves; they were one of the most prominent families in town, loved by everyone because of everything they did, whether it was from donating a lot of money to charities, volunteering for various service acts or entertaining the town with their family talent.

So naturally, everyone knew about the town’s pride and joy, especially when he kept breaking academic and athletic records that were previously held by his parents. 

"Hi.” He releases a chuckle as you stare into his eyes. From the pictures you’ve seen of him, you know Jeongguk has big dark deer brown eyes, but now looking at them in person, there is something in his eyes that make him so alluring. Maybe it’s because he has the “I’m going to change the world” kind of look in his eyes, or maybe it’s because his eyes are going to change your own life. “Are you okay?” 

“Yeah.” For the first time in your life, your heart skips a beat. Perhaps it’s from sitting in a stranger’s lap, or perhaps it’s because he looks endearing with his pink denim jacket. “You have really brown eyes.” 

“Do I really?” This time he laughs, releasing a sweet sound into the air. 

You wanted to tell him that you like hearing his laugh and that you wanted to hear it even more, maybe, even for the rest of your life, but somehow, the words that came out did not match your thoughts. “Actually, did I say brown? I meant green.” 

When he laughs again, you couldn’t help but to smile. “I always thought they were like sea-blue eyes.” Even though it’s the first time meeting him, it seems like he appreciates the sarcasm remark and knows what you are trying to say. 

"Why don’t you take a seat next to Jeongguk instead of his lap, Y/N?” Your instructor asks, embarrassing you even more. 

“Sorry.” Finally, getting out of your trance, you get up and brush off the imaginary dust off your black jeans. “My bad.”

“No, it’s cool.” He laughs again, keeping a sweet smile on his face. “I’m Jeongguk. You should sit down.” 

Taking a seat next to him, you notice that his driver’s education assignment book was in the corner of his table while a thick book was opened, waiting to be read. “What are you reading?”

He shrugs, picking up the book from the table to show you. 

Raising your eyebrows, you see Jeon Jeongguk reading your favorite book from your favorite series. You would have never thought in a million years that he would enjoy reading, let alone reading a book that you desperately love with your whole heart. “Your teachers are making you read that?” 

“Actually, believe it or not, I like reading and I like this book,” he says defensively, as if someone has offended him before for reading. He looks away, staring down at the book. He’s ready for you to make fun of him even more, that you’d be another person to add on his list who shames him for reading. “What about it?” 

“It’s one of my favorite books.” you awkwardly chuckle, ignoring his defensive tone. “I cried really hard when I read Dumbledore dies.”

“Wait what? You like this?” He looks back at you, trying to comprehend the situation. “Like you really like this?”

“What, did you think I was making fun of you?” You smile, making his heart flutter. “I love that book.”

“No way!” His eyes light up like a small child coming down to see the presents under the Christmas tree. “I never met anyone else who liked this book or reading in general.” 

“It’s one of my favorite series, but the author is definitely a different story.” You see he nods his head excitedly in agreement. “I really like when he says ‘You care so much..’”

With no struggle or hesitation, he recites the quote perfectly, “You feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.”

And from there, everything in the world suddenly makes sense. Everything clicks. The two of you end up talking about everything, anything, and nothing, and eventually, your instructor kick the both of you out of the classroom to stop distracting others. Despite being polar opposites, you still manage to find common ground with Jeongguk, forming an infinite bond with him, completely changing your life forever. 

________

By the time your second year of high school comes around, you finally are able to drive yourself home and back without the loud complaints and screams of your parents. 

On the first day, you pick up Alaina up. 

As long as you could remember, the two of you were inseparable and did almost everything together. You were always in the same classes and clubs growing up, but when high school came around, you stopped doing the same extracurricular activities. You hid your head in your studies, and your talks with her became less frequent as she cheered for every sport her boyfriend was in. It seemed like picking her up and sitting next to her in class were the only way you could still talk to her.

“Y/N? Hey, Y/N!” When walking from the parking lot to the entrance of the school, you hear someone calling your name. Turning your head back, you see someone in a black t-shirt and ripped jeans, getting out of the parked car right next to yours. “

“Who is that?” Alaina asks, squinting her eyes, trying to see whoever was calling your name. 

Squinting your eyes, you figure out it’s Jeongguk calling out for you. 

At first you don’t say anything, debating on whether or not to tell the truth or ignore Jeongguk. It wasn’t like you wanted to lie, but you also did not want to say the answer you knew that would upset her. “It’s actually Jeon Jeongguk.”

When you told her about Jeongguk, she didn’t believe it at first, or maybe, she refused to believe it. 

“You and Jeongguk have been talking this whole summer?” Two weeks before school was about to start, you picked Alaina up from dance camp, and while you were driving, she took a look at your phone, scrolling through the latest texts from Jeongguk. “I can’t believe you guys were able to befriend each other.” 

“What is that supposed to mean?” You asked with a hint of hurt in your voice.

“I don’t know if you like him or not, but I just want to let you know that it’s just a bad idea.” Her voice was filled with caution while her eyes were filled with sincerity and anxiety. “As crappy as this sounds, you guys do come from different worlds, and if and when those worlds do collide, you’re going to get hurt.”

Frowning, you sighed. “We’re just friends.” 

“For now,” she warns. “You’re old enough to make your own decisions, but I just want to warn you, he will break your heart when the time comes.” 

“Wait up!” He screams across the parking lot. 

The both of you stop in your tracks, looking at each other. She tilts her head in annoyance, not wanting you to talk to him. “You’re not seriously going to wait for him, are you?” 

“Do I need your permission to do that?” The sarcastic joke doesn’t sit well with Alaina as she gives another death glare. Everything had to be serious with her. “I’m not going to see him around at all, might as well to say hi for one day.” 

Jeongguk finally catches up to you and awkwardly waves at Alaina, not knowing what to do. He releases a sigh when Alaina doesn’t give him any type of response. 

The three of you start walking more towards the entrance of the school, but your best friend gives you some privacy, walking a few steps behind to let the both of you talk. 

“How was your summer?” You ask, walking to the door. 

“Just a lot of baseball stuff, and I learned how to fence when I went to Australia, so that was cool,” he says. “What about you? Did you do anything fun?”

“Not really.” Compared to other people, your summer sucked and was uneventful. Everyone in your grade was out, traveling to new places or experimenting new things that included almost all kinds of alcohol and drugs while you sat by your cousin’s pool, reading books and listening to new kinds of music while chatting with your relatives. There isn’t really anything special to it; you literally do the same thing when it wasn’t summer. “I just spent time with my family.” 

“That’s cool too.” A smile appears on his face. “Are you excited for your classes?”

You shrug your shoulders, and he laughs like it’s the funniest thing in the world. Over the summer, he has learned that you do care about school deeply, but present this apathetic, indifferent façade in front of everyone. “It’s going to be the way it is. What about you?” 

“Honestly, I’m a little nervous.” Jeongguk sighs and hands over a piece of paper to you. “It’s my schedule. Do you think you can help me find my classes again? I forgot everything from freshman orientation.” 

Taking a quick look down at his schedule, you notice Jeongguk’s put his shaky hands into his pockets. “You have geometry in the West wing where everything else is on the East wing. Do you want me to show you?” 

“If that’s cool with you.” With his hardened facial expression, he’s trying not to look nervous in front of everyone, but you could tell he’s nervous from his shaking hands and how he keeps on rocking on his toes. “What about you? Where are your classes?”

“The bell is going to ring soon,” Alaina says, walking away. “I’ll save you a seat in AP Lit.”

“I’m everywhere in this building, but my first class is in the east wing.” You hand Jeongguk’s schedule back to him and turn around where your black backpack was now facing him. “Can you open the smallest pocket and grab the thing out for me?”

Slowly, he unzips your backpack with a forced chuckle, not understanding why you couldn’t do it yourself. With your head turned slightly back, you give him a small smile when he scrunches his face in confusion, not understanding what you were asking from him. 

“Gummy worms?” Holding the purple bag with his left hand, he gently pushes your cheek, so your head looks forward. “I don’t want you to hurt your neck.”

“Take them.”

This time, his chuckle isn’t forced and comes out naturally. “Are these like magic gummy worms, or are these somehow supposed to help me?” 

“On my first day of freshman year, I thought I could do it all myself,” You tell him as he zips your bag up. “I didn’t look at my schedule that completely changed and went to all the wrong classes. It was shit, but at the end of the day, I had these gummy worms to make me feel a lot better.” 

“For a second, I thought you were calling me fat.” The bell rings right as when you start laughing, and at that moment, Jeongguk wishes that he could have heard the melodic sound you made with your eyes and nose scrunched up.

“You should head to class, Bud.” Everyone is heading towards their first period class while the two of you are still standing by the front doors. “Text me if you need anything.”

He moves to stand next to you, giving you a small smile. In a small voice, he asks, “Will you be there for me?”

“Of course, I’ll be there,” you say, not knowing that sentence would mean a lot to him.

Jeongguk only needs to walk a few meters to get to the West Wing while you have to walk what seemed like a marathon to get the first period class in the East Wing.

The tardy bell rings once you sit in the seat right next to Alaina. 

“Where’s the gummy worms?” She’s asking about the gummy worms that you always share with her, the same ones you gave to Jeongguk.

“I gave them to Jeongguk.” She rolled her eyes. “He needed them more than us.” 

“I’m sure he did,” she grunted. “What’s next? You’re going to ditch me and walk him to all his classes?” 

You tell her that was unlikely, but that was before Jeongguk was standing by the classroom door, waiting for you with the empty bag of gummy worms in his hands at the end of first period. He thanks you for the worms and tells you all about his class, not leaving a single detail out as he walks you to your second period class. 

Even when his class is in the opposite side of the building from yours, he somehow makes the time to go to yours and walks you to every class period. Sometimes, he’ll barely make the tardy bell, but he thinks it’ll be worth being tardy if that means he gets to talk to you even more. 

He knows he’s not obligated to walk you to class, but he does so anyway, and you let him.

________

“Do you have any plans tonight?” With all his sport practices and him running around through town to support his siblings, there was actually no time for you and Jeongguk to spend time together, so Fridays during fourth period became the designated time for the two of you to ditch class and eat an early lunch together in the baseball dug out.

“No idea.” Although you shrug, you want to say that you already were going to the football game tonight to support the team and drink hot chocolate with your friends in the bleachers, but it doesn’t come out. “What’s up?” 

Being with you makes him feel like he can say anything without any judgement, but at the same time, he nervous and bites inside of his cheek, not knowing if he wants to say what’s on his mind. “You should come to the game tonight.” 

Just like the first time he met you, he’s ready to be embarrassed and humiliated from the jokes and insults, but when he hears your euphoric laugh, he could have sworn he also heard wedding bells. “Okay, I will.”

The corners of his mouth turned up. He can’t stop smiling, especially after seeing you grin as well. “Really?” 

“Yeah, of course!” Even though you’re happy to go for him, you couldn’t help but to wonder why he wants you to go. Awkwardly chuckling, you ask, “But is it because Iron Man coming to the game tonight, or why are you telling me to go?” 

“I think I’m playing tonight, like, I’m starting.” 

“Deadass?” The football coach was known to only put his favorites onto the field, and those favorites had to be extremely good. Most of the time, people usually don’t play on the field until their senior year. If the coach didn’t like you or didn’t think you were good enough, you were benched. 

“Deadass,” he affirms, trying to hold back a smile. “Sam got a technical, and Coach says he wants to put me in to replace him for now.” 

“That’s great.” The bell for the next period rings, but Jeongguk hasn’t finished his turkey sandwich, and his trash and tupperware are everywhere. “I’m going to head out, but I will see you later tonight.”

"Where’s your friend?” Of course, Alaina catches you in the halls the one time Jeongguk doesn’t walk you to class. “Did he get lost in the big school?” 

Even though Jeongguk has been nothing, but a great friend to you, she still did not approve of your friendship with him, and she liked to be very vocal about it. Some days, you would tell her to knock it off and to stop being immature, but today, something inside you wants to snap. “I’m pretty sure cheerleaders are supposed to support everyone.”

She stops to look at you, not expecting you to talk back at her. “Excuse me?”

“He’s playing in the game tonight.” 

This time, she raises her eyebrows up in amusement, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “Freshmeat Jeongguk thinks Coach Jackass Kim is going to put him in tonight?”

“I guess we’ll see.”

When Jeongguk’s name is announced by press announcer, Alaina, on her cheer box, takes a look back, trying to spot you in the crowd, and she sighs before giving you a look that she’s impressed. 

After every football game, your small town and school had a tradition where students, families of the team and the cheerleaders and any other community members just go onto the field (or court) to talk, say ‘good job’, take pictures and more. 

As you wait for Alaina to put her cheer stuff away, it doesn’t take long for you to spot Jeongguk on the field. He’s all sweaty and sticky in his black football jersey, but that doesn’t stop him from wrapping his arms around his mom, who, is laughing, but is also playfully trying to get him off. This is the happiest you’ve ever seen him, and you just want that moment to last forever.

“Are you going to talk to him?” Alaina’s voice is filled with mockery and disgust when she stands next to you and sees how your eyes stare and glimmer at Jeongguk and his family. “Tell him congrats on his first and probably last varsity game?”

That something in you that wanted to snap earlier, finally does. “What the fuck is your problem, Alaina?

Occasionally, you would raise your voice when you’re trying to get someone’s attention across the hall or when you were trying to be the loudest person in the bleachers, cheering for the team, but you’ve never actually raised your voice at Alaina till now. “What?”

"I don’t need to repeat myself when you heard me loud and clear.” 

“Are you serious right now?” Scoffing, she shakes her head, not liking the treatment you were giving her. “You’ve changed all because some stupid guy gives you an inch of attention?” 

Taking a quick glance around the field, you notice how everyone stopped their conversations with their friends and families, and they were all now interested into listening to yours. “Do you honestly think someone like him wants to be friends with someone as hopeless as you? He only wanted the attention you gave him, that’s it.” 

“Hey, don’t fucking disrespect her like that.” Out of nowhere, Jeongguk appears next to you, putting his hand on your back, rubbing comforting circles to comfort you. You turn your head to look at him just to find him staring at Alaina with rage. “Believe it or not, Y/N can make her own choices and have her own life that doesn’t include you. Don’t try to gaslight her and manipulate her when she’s done absolutely nothing wrong.” 

Finally, he looks at you as Alaina gives up and walks away, and he’s looking at you as if nothing else in the world matters to him. The world could have been collapsing, and he would look at you the same way, only wanting to see you. “Are you okay?”

Avoiding his gaze, you nod and look onto the ground, not wanting to see if his eyes were filled with pity or insincerity. Just like the first time you meet him, you’re embarrassed. “I’m so sorry.”

“Why? You have nothing to be sorry for.” He offers his million dollar smile, moving his hand onto your shoulder. “Come on, I’ll take you home tonight.”

Meeting his eyes again, you notice his eyes are filled with sincerity, that he’s being genuine, that everything he says is what he means. “Oh no, you don’t have to.”

“It’s on the way to my house, it’s cool.”

"No it’s not.” In fact, the two of you live in opposite directions, and everyone knows it. A lot of Jeongguk’s family resided on the west side of town, living in neighborhoods with great views of the city, next to the bridge view while you lived in the east direction, almost thirty minutes away from each other.

“I want to take you home, Y/N.” 

So you let him. 

The two of you walk to the parking lot in silence. He’s putting his football equipment into the back of his car while you adjust the air, trying to find the perfect spot to hit you and him. 

“Why are you still friends with her?” He asks once he gets in, breaking the ice.

When it takes you a while to answer, he sighs, starting his car with his automatic headlights coming on. Silence fills the car as he drives towards to your house.

It wasn’t until him pulling into your driveway, where you finally can put your thoughts into words. “As stupid as it sounds, she’s been there for me through everything..Everyone leaves me, and I guess she decided to choose to stay by my side and not leave, ya know?” 

“Can I be honest?” 

“You can always be honest with me, Guk.” 

"What she did tonight to you was not okay in any shape, way or form. She had no right to say that.” He turns his head to look at you. “And I hope you know that none of what she said is true.” 

"I know.” You take a breath. “She only said it to make me mad.” 

“To be honest, I never really liked her.” He sighs in relief, happy to finally get this off his chest. “There was just something about her that just made her seem off, and her jealously and how she wanted to hurt you tonight really shows her true colors. Just because she’s been there for you all your life, doesn’t mean how she treats you is okay.” 

“I know.” 

“I mean it, Y/N,” he says. “I’m here for you now.”

“Okay.”  

“I know what it’s like, to be alone, to have no one understand you, and I never want you to ever feel that way. From now on, I’m here for you, always. We’re great friends, and I truly value our friendship and you.” Before you could tell him anything else, he sighs again. “I have to wake up early tomorrow for my sister’s basketball tournament, so I have go.” 

“I’m sorry for ruining your night.” 

“You didn’t, but you can make it up to me by going to all my games.”

So you do. 

__________

From spending long tiring hours in the library, reading books and studying with your new friends to traveling through the city to city to watch all of Jeongguk’s football, hockey, and baseball games, sophomore year is all a blur. 

Although your year is a complete blur, Jeongguk remembers it all. 

Since the night he first played on varsity, your friendship has blossomed into something greater. He became your sun on your most rainy days.

By the end of football season, he can tell all your tics: your lip trembles when you lie, you yawn in a middle of your cries, and you always put your hair into a ponytail when you’re stressed (which he finds adorable). You can tell all of his, how he rocks on his feet when he’s nervous and he blinks when he curses. 

When he’s put onto varsity hockey team, you find out his biggest fears of being alone, how he always want to be good enough and how he hates the work “irk.” With you, Jeongguk learns the complicated history of your parents, how you rarely saw them as they worked shifts at random times, and how you never wanted to be home to see them. He knows how you’re afraid, not because they do anything bad, but you don’t want them to be disappointed in them if they just stared at you and figured you out. 

At the end of baseball season, the two of you practically know each other, inside and out, making the two of you inseparable. If you were there in the halls, Jeongguk was for sure there in a five foot radius. 

“Thought I’d find you here.” Jeongguk’s heart skips a beat when you turn your head back to smile back at him. He’s wearing an oversized baggy grey t-shirt with black jeans with his back backpack slung over his shoulder. “You know school is officially over, right?” 

“Just waiting for the school librarian to kick me out,” you teased, making him throw his head back to laugh. Your joke is stupid, but you just make him laugh so easily. Everything with you is so easy. “Why are you still here?” 

Instead of answering, he uncrumbles a piece of paper in front of him: his schedule. With your head still turned back, you attempt to read it, but Jeongguk rolls his eyes and puts it in front of you. “I dropped business and switched some things around.” 

“Hey, what a coincidence!” You exclaimed excitedly, looking back at him. “We have the first four periods together next semester.” 

Jeongguk shrugs and doesn’t say anything, because he already knows. For the last few days, he’s been working, trying to find classes or trying to get permission from a bunch of teachers to take the same classes and electives as you just so he could walk you and sit next to you in class. No more rushing and trying to beat the tardy bell. 

Getting his schedule back from you, he pats your shoulders. “Come on, I have a surprise for you before I go.”

The smile on your face disappears when Jeongguk mentions he’s leaving, reminding you that everyone, especially your closest friend is traveling for the summer while you were alone and stuck in your hometown for the next three months. “Okay.” 

Although Jeongguk’s surprise is a thirty minute drive away from your hometown and he absolutely hates driving for a long period of time, he’s happy to be able to talk to you and take quick glances at you every time he hits a red light. 

When he finally arrives at the destination, he looks over to you, seeing euphoria and happiness filled in your eyes. He’s wondering how he could live in this moment forever and not let it go, so content with how things are right now, but he knows one day, your friendship would change, and he has to learn to live with that. 

“This is perfect, Dude.” Finally, you look over to him. “Thank you.”

One day, he thinks. One day, things will be different.

"It’s actually my grandma’s bookshop,” he says. “I know that summer is always hard for you, but now, you have a place to escape to when you just want to feel happy and surrounded by things you love.”

Unexpectedly, you pull him towards you and awkwardly wrap your arms around him despite the seatbelts restraining the both of you. “I hope time flies, so summer ends soon.” 

He laughs. “September will be here before you know it.” 

Just like any other summer, everyone is traveling and spending time in new places where you were still doing the same thing, but this time, you can add Jeongguk’s grandmother’s bookshop to the places you see.

But now with the distance between you and Jeongguk and his very busy schedule, the two of you haven’t been able to talk. As you would wait for Jeongguk to find time to reply, you would always bump into Jay. He’s always reading a classic book and seems to be the opposite of Jeongguk, but still, for some reason, he captures your attention enough to say yes when he asks you to go on a date with him after you bump into him for the fifth time. 

When August comes around, you’re still going on dates with Jay, and you even let him come over and meet your mom, which Jeongguk hasn’t even done yet. 

“Hey kiddo.” With a phone up to her ear, your mother knocks on the opened wooden door. “I’m on the phone with Jeongguk’s parents.” 

In history, you remember learning about the “shot heard round the world” and how your classmates really amazed that people from anywhere could have heard the gunshot. But hearing the fear and concern in your mother’s voice seem louder than that. “Is something wrong?” 

“Jeongguk’s coming back home today,” she says. “They say he tore something called a meniscus? I don’t know, something with his knee. It’s not looking good. He’s going to get surgery.” 

___________

Despite the pain he was feeling everywhere, Jeongguk feels like he is walking on clouds effortlessly and freely when he sees you in front of him. Your head is resting near the knee that had surgery, holding his right hand with both of yours. With his free hand, he strokes your hair as you peacefully sleep, soft snores and gasps coming from your mouth.

Jeongguk considers himself to be a very patient person, but he couldn’t believe that you were actually getting more sleep in front of him when he was the one who was operated on. As much as he wanted you to get some sleep, he wants to hear your voice. “Hey.”

Being a light sleeper, you stir a bit before finally opening your eyes to find Jeongguk in front of you, staring. A part of you is happy that he’s okay, another part is exhausted, wanting to go back to sleep while the other part wants to cry, because he’s here. He’s really here. “Guk, you’re okay.” 

“I didn’t expect you to drool when you sleep.” He lightly chuckles, still staring and stroking your hair. "What’s wrong? Everything okay?” 

Squeezing his hand tighter, your eyes flooded with tears. It wasn’t often that you end up crying, but here you are, in front of him, wanting to cry. “You’re really here.”

“Did you miss me that much?”

His attempt to make you smile is successful. “You’re such a dork.” 

“I’m here,” he squeezes back. “A month early all because I did a stupid drill during football camp, but it’s worth seeing you again.”

“But you can’t play this season and you’ll be on crutches.”

He shrugs, not wanting to think about that now. “Let’s just enjoy this moment.”

The rest of the night is filled with silence, a different kind of silence the both of you were used to. It wasn’t the kind of silence where it’s awkward and there’s absolutely nothing else to talk about. It’s the kind of silence where in that moment it feels like the two of you are so comfortable with each other that the silence is perfect. The two of you accept each other’s presence without any judgement and worries.

“Guk?” This time, Jeongguk has his eyes shut close, and your left hand cups his face, thumb caressing his cheek. “Are you awake?” He is, but or some reason, he chooses to stay quiet, to not stir, to let you think he’s peacefully asleep. “I’ve been reading a lot, and there’s this quote that I think resonated with us: ‘I have nothing to say except that you are the one to whom I want to say nothing.’ I was so scared, Guk. I never want to lose you ever.” 

Knowing all of his cousins, aunts, uncles, and many more extended family members would visit him and help him get home, you leave early in the morning, leaving a handwritten note that you would talk to him later, wanting him rest and spend time with family. 

Thinking of you, he wishes you had stayed to meet the most important and supportive people in his life, and he tells his family that he wishes they could have met you too. His grandmother teases him about his crush and how she thinks it’s cute that the two of you were close when you have a boyfriend.

He doesn’t say anything. 

The pain finally kicks in.

For all of his life, he has always been playing a sport, but now, he feels completely lost without it. He wants to talk to you, rant about he feels betrayed by his own body, that he cannot participate in a season of football, and maybe hockey. And he knows you are just one phone call away, always being so understanding and saying the right things to comfort him, but for some reason, he feels like he lost you too. 

It all hurts.

And his cousins can tell. 

So when his cousins tell him they have something to numb the pain, something to help him relax and clear his head, Jeongguk takes their offer and smokes it. 

______

They weren’t kidding when they say junior year is the toughest year during high school. 

At the start of junior year, you’re overwhelmed from all your college classes and the constant, meaningless arguments with Jay about the (lack of) progression in the relationship between the two of you. 

If it weren’t for your four classes with Jeongguk, you definitely would have dropped out and move into a whole different country, forgetting everyone and everything you’ve ever known here. He’s always there, making small idle conversation, taking your mind off the things you would be dealing with later. 

But despite that, your heart aches. 

He is still your Jeongguk, but there is something that’s different, and you couldn’t figure out what exactly. You try having those deep conversation with him and attempt to spend more time with him outside of school, but he always talked about homework only and went somewhere else with the students involved in the athletic department. 

There’s a pained feeling in your chest; it’s as if your heart got stung by a thorn. Your heart ache, thinking if you would to stop talking to Jeongguk, the two of you would never talk ever again. 

It’s a strange feeling, missing someone when they’re literally right next to you. 

It wasn’t until two months into the school year where you discover Jeongguk started drinking and smoking.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Raising his eyebrows, he looks up from the partner assignment the both of you were working on in your foreign language class, giving you a look of confusion, before he realizes what you’re talking about. 

“I don’t think this is the right place or time to talk about this.” His reply makes your heart sink a little; he never cared about what the two of you talk about in public. “Besides, you never told me about Jay.” 

“Because there’s nothing to talk about,” you gritted through your teeth.

“Funny how he says the opposite to everyone,” he deadpans, looking back down at his assignment, no longer looking at you, acting interested in finishing his homework. 

“If there was anything, I would have told you, Guk.” No response. “He and I are friends, the same way you and me are.”

“Friends, right.” He takes a quick glance at you, thinking about if that word actually represented the two of you. There’s a feeling of resentfulness towards you that Jay is somehow on the same level as him, but he doesn’t say anything, staring at the assignment. Though at the same time, he’s glad there really is nothing more. “There’s nothing wrong with me doing it.” 

“I never said there was,” you articulate. ”I never judge you, because I know you will always do what’s best.” He wonders why you think that of him. “I just don’t want you to get in trouble if you get caught, and I don’t want you to get hurt or have it affect you negatively. I just don’t want to lose you.” 

“And you won’t,” he promises. 

But that doesn’t stop you from feeling like you have. 

He should listen to your warning, but instead, he takes it like he has your permission and blessing to continue doing it. He lets the drinking and smoking become an everyday thing, and he feels great. Everything is all numb: he doesn’t feel the pain in his knee and the pain of your friendship. Nothing is on his mind, just the way he wants it to be.  

Jeongguk’s pulling away from you, and you didn’t do anything about it. 

And he wishes you did.

_______

Three weeks before the hockey season starts, Jeongguk leaves third period early to go to his last session of physical therapy, finally happy to he finally walk on his own again. He snaps you a snap of a picture of him genuinely smiling with his crutches, something you haven’t seen awhile with the caption: the day has finally come, and no more using these bad boys. 

When he walks out through the hospital doors, he’s getting ready to call you again, tell you how he happy he is. He wants to hear your voice, congratulating him and hyping him up, like you always do.

About to press the green call button, a snowball is thrown at his chest, forcing him to look up. “Y/N!” His lights sparkle with happiness, seeing you stand in front of him. “You’re here.” 

“I wouldn’t miss this for the entire world.” 

Before he could say anything, you throw another snowball at him, making him laugh. He opens his mouth again, and you quickly pick up snow from the ground, throwing it again. 

“You really have a death wish upon you!” This time, he forms a snowball quickly, making you run and scream. The two of you are laughing and running around in the hospital parking lot, having the best time. You want to make today memorable for him, for him to always be this happy without drugs or alcohol. 

“So you and Roman..” His voice trails off, trying to catch a breath in the cold. The two of you take a break of throwing snowballs at each other, now just standing close to each other, each of you holding a snowball in your hands. 

You raised your eyebrows, wanting him to finish his sentence. “What about me and him?” Roman is in your third and fourth period class, talking to you and walking to you to class when Jeongguk didn’t. Again, the two of you have a platonic friendship, but everyone in your school could not believe the concept of boys and girls being friends and not lovers. 

He hesitates, then carefully asks, “Is it the same like me and Sydney?” 

Numerous questions fill your thoughts, not understanding the situation between you and your best friend. Scrunching your eyebrows in confusion, you ask with some unintentional harshness in your voice, “Who the fuck is Sydney?” 

He knows you and loves your voice when you’re confused; some people might find you passive aggressive and angry, but you were just confused and blunt, unware of any context given to you. He rolls his eyes, laughing right after. “You’re the biggest dork ever.” 

Somehow, that sentence ignites something inside you, awakening your senses and imagination, letting thousands of hypothetical situations go through your head, like Jeongguk in his black hockey jersey, having his arm wrapped around you, laughing and rolling his eyes to something you said.

Looking at his crimson-colored cheeks, you want to go on your toes to press your lips against them, give them some warmth, and you want him to do the same. 

A wave of nausea hits you like a ton of bricks, making you drop the snowball in your hands. The color from your face drains as you think about all the growing feelings you were experiencing for your best friend. They come at you all at once with no warning or brakes, overwhelming every fiber in your being. “I think I need to go.” 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” He reaches out to put his hand on your shoulder, but you take a step backwards, not wanting to feel his touch. There is a hint of hurt on his face when you flinch, but he shakes it off, displaying the look of concern. “Are you okay?”

“I think I’m sick from being out in the cold.” Jeongguk knows you were lying by your trembling lip. At first, he wants to laugh because even after all this time, you still couldn’t lie to him, but every other thought after that one, he just wants to make sure you’re okay. He wants to know what is wrong and if he did something to offend you. “Talk to you later, yeah?” 

His lower lip quivers as well, hesitating on what to say next. He knows that you were hiding something, and as much as he wants to call you out on it, he doesn’t. Instead, he nods and lets you go. “Drive safe, okay? Text me when you get home.” 

Jeongguk celebrates that night by getting drunk and high with his friends, trying to forget the pained look you had on your face as you lay in bed at home, staring at your ceiling, thinking about that one simple sentence, letting it consume the rest of your waking days. 

_____

“So after two years, you finally just realized that you’re practically in love with Jeongguk?” Your close friend Adelaide teases, nudging her elbow to your side, trying to make you laugh. “Was that so hard to admit?” 

It’s been a week since you’ve been away from Jeongguk; you and Adelaide flew across the country to compete at the national level for your school’s Academic Decathlon. You’ve been so busy with the competition and tried to distract yourself from thinking about him. Now, with the competition over, you and Adelaide lay next to each other on your hotel bed, telling her all your thoughts and feelings that have been consuming you. 

"Yes.” You release a sigh, staring at the popcorn ceiling, overwhelmed with every feeling in your body as all you can think about is Jeongguk.

“Do you think it was a love at first sight kind of thing?”

“No.” The love you feel for your best friend was gradual, slowly progressing over time. “But I think everything changed after the football game, where he saw me in a vulnerable state, and I let him into my heart. And now, I just really miss him, especially right now. But he’s not even thinking about me at all.” 

“You don’t know that.” Adelaide counters. “I really do think he likes you.”

“At this point, don’t you think we’ve been friends long enough that we can’t like each other?”

“Come on, Y/N,” she says in her teasing voice, but her tone changes when she realizes you don’t know what she’s talking about. “Jeongguk literally looks at you like you’re his everything.” 

“No he doesn’t.” 

"He’s completely lost without you!” She states it like it’s the obvious. “Everyone knows that he will do anything for you.” 

“Things are different now,” you admit. “A lot different.”

"Because of Jay and the drugs?” 

“And apparently someone named Sydney,” you mumble under your breath, saying the girl’s name with venom in your voice.

“Wait that’s actually true?” She asks with urgency in her voice. “He’s talking to her?”

“Okay, who the fuck is Sydney?” You ask again in the same tone you did before. “Am I the only one who doesn’t know her?”

“She’s literally the girl version of Jeongguk, always playing every sport, breaking lots of records, except in our year. Her family has been here for generations. She seems really innocent and dumb, but she’s always drinking and smoking in the school bathrooms, has a bunch of flings,” she explained. “She’s Alaina’s best friend now actually.” 

“That explains a lot.” Ever since the night of Jeongguk’s first varsity game, you and Alaina were no longer on speaking terms, her believing you took Jeongguk’s side over her. Since then, you never bothered to keep up with her and ignored everything surrounding and associating her. 

“I don’t think that’s his type though, so why don’t you just ask him if he likes you?”

Peeling your eyes from the ceiling, you give her a questionable glare. “Because surely asking him if he has feelings for me is a great conversation starter. What a great idea, Adelaide.”

"No, you idiot.” She rolls her eyes, getting up to sit up straight, handing over your phone. “Just ask him what he thinks of you, and then you’ll know your answer.” 

“Wow.” You scoff, unlocking your phone. “Maybe it is that easy.” 

Already, there was a text from him around ten minutes ago. 

[guk] what time did you want me to pick you up? 

“He’s picking you up?” Adelaide asks, taking a peak at your phone. 

“Yeah, before I left, he asked me if he could give me a ride back home,” you say as you start typing a text.

10, does that work for you?

[guk] oh fuck, i might have baseball practice. if i do, i’ll let you know but my mom can take you home too 

okay. hey random, guk, what do you honestly think of me? 

[guk] you know how i feel about you

i don’t. that’s why i’m asking 

[guk] then i don’t think now is a good time to answer that 

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Adelaide asks, still looking at the conversation, not knowing what’s going on. You know, but you just hope it wasn’t the case. “Why can’t he fucking tell you?” 

why?

[guk] i’m so drunk right now

For the last few months, you feel so emotionally drain, grieving over the person Jeongguk used to be and trying to still have him in your life, not wanting to lose him despite the new person he is. You couldn’t help but to send an angry, passive aggressive text. 

of course you are 

[guk] what is that supposed to mean 

ur always drunk 

[guk] is that so bad 

i just don’t get you, guk. it’s always a guessing game with you, one step forward, five steps back. i don’t know where i stand sometimes when we barely talk anymore and how do i know when you’re always like this 

[guk] i’m too drunk to handle this. 

Not responding to him, he takes your silence as an end to the conversation, which leaves you more confused than before. More thoughts fill your head, letting your insecurity eat you away. Does he secretly hate you? Does he think about you all the time? Why is it that he couldn’t tell you the truth when drunk? He’s your best friend, you would have think he’s comfortable to tell you anything.

It all hurts. 

This is your first big argument with him, and it stings your heart.

The following day, you didn’t expect Jeongguk to be waiting for you at the airport right at 10. Tears fill your eyes when he smiles, taking your duffel bag away from you. He wraps his arm around your shoulder, whispering “Welcome back home.” 

The two of you don’t talk about last night.

________

Usually when people are asked about their favorite season, they say spring or summer, but for you, your favorite season is baseball season.

“How can you like this fucking sport?” Adelaide asks, sitting next to you on the metal bleachers, breaking the silence. “It’s way too humid, this game is slow and nothing happens!” 

You shrug your shoulders. “It’s very cathartic.” 

“For fucks sake, Jeongguk has been at bat for over four minutes! Just let the poor kid strike out or walk,” she exclaims, getting horrendous looks and hushes from the parents around you. “Anything just so this game can finally progress.”

Jeongguk’s best sport has always been baseball, always getting the “MVP” title in the district and having the highest batting average on the team, so when he strikes out for the fourth time this game, you grimace.

“Notice how Jeongguk suddenly sucks after his fight with you,” Adelaide points out.  

It’s been two weeks since the national decathlon competition, and everything goes back to normal: you and Jeongguk only talk during class, always making small talk and strictly only talking about the assignments and lectures. Everything seems normal, but there’s a weird awkward tension in the air. 

Rolling your eyes, you focus on the baseball game. “It doesn’t have anything to do with me. He’s probably just having a bad day.” 

“Funny how he’s been having a ‘bad day’ for the last two weeks,” she sarcastically remarks. 

The inning changes, and your heart drops when someone else puts on the catcher’s gear and goes onto the field where Jeongguk is supposed to be. You turn your head, seeing Jeongguk’s mom gather her stuff and leaves the stands with a worried look on her face as his dad talks to the school’s athletics director. 

You’re not paying attention anymore, leaving Adelaide alone on the stands to go outside the dugout to see Jeongguk, all pale, drinking his gigantic water jug as his mom pats him down with wet towels.

When he sees his face, he waves his mom away and slowly stands up. It happens so quickly that you rush to him, and he wraps his arms around you. “You’re okay.” 

“I’m okay,” he reassures. “I’m just really dizzy and I took myself out of the game.”

“I don’t know why I thought I was going to lose you.” 

He chuckles, squeezing you a little tighter than before. “It’s going to take more than that to get rid of me.”

“You’re okay,” you repeat again. You sound like you’re about to cry, but you don’t cry. “You’re okay.” 

There’s a French phrase, “la douleur exquise” that translates to exquisite pain, but in French, it’s deeper. It’s talking about the pain of unrequited love, loving and wanting someone you can never have.

And at the moment, you felt it, the exquisite pain of loving Jeongguk, someone you can lose at any given time or place, even when it didn’t matter because he would never be yours.

________

Unlike all summers, Jeongguk doesn’t go anywhere at all. 

Instead, he stays in your hometown, being selected with Sydney to coach and teach little kids how to properly play sports at summer camps. It’s a big deal for him, that he decides to stay sober, not wanting to risk his coach position. Besides that, he spends his time with his family, reading and laughing at his grandmother’s bookshop, hoping to see you there, but you spent your summer by your cousin’s pool once again. 

Knowing how busy Jeongguk is, you don’t ask him to spend time with you, but he promises he’ll see you once before the school year starts. 

It wasn’t until hours before the first day of senior year where Jeongguk calls you in the middle of the night, asking you to meet him on the bridge, to watch the sunrise over the bridge right before school starts. He smiles when you get into his car, all sleepy wrapped around your red checkered-pattern blanket.

“Why did we think this was a good idea?” He asks, shuddering next to you on park bench on the bridge, sharing the blanket together. 

“I didn’t think it was,” you mumbled, still groggy from waking up from your slumber. “I just wanted to hang out with you since we haven’t this summer.”

“Right, my bad.” His way of apologizing is different; he doesn’t actually say it, but you know he is. “I know I promised to hang out this summer, especially since I didn’t go anywhere.” 

You don’t say anything to his apology, rubbing your eyes with your fists. “So how are you and Sydney?” 

“I don’t get her at all.” He groans, finally seeing the sun rise, the warm colors being visible. “She tells me she wants to hang out, that I am the only one who gets her, that she wants me, but she won’t go out with me because she’s scared. She always picks her friends over me, giving me these weird signals.” 

In your mind, you’re telling Jeongguk that she’s a bitch, that he deserves better, that he should be with someone who gives him the time and day. But you don’t tell him that out loud. Instead, you just nod. “Don’t waste your time for her, especially when she’s not ready.” 

“Yeah, you’re right. I just like her, I guess.” Changing the subject, he says, “Look away.” he points in the direction of where the softer colors were being swallowed up from the bright, warm colors that everyone focuses on when looking at a sunrise. “Isn’t that pretty?”

You chuckle, tilting your head to look at him. Although he doesn’t look at you quite yet, he knows confusion is written all over your face, and he loves it. “That’s not the sunrise.”

“I know, but that’s really nice to look at, ya know? There will be other things to look at, that will be there, and that won’t catch your attention, but you should try to find those things, so you don’t miss it.” One of your favorite things about Jeongguk is his perspective, how he always manages to open your mind even more. He turns his head to find you still staring, and he laughs. “What?” 

“I missed you.” 

He stares back at you, and it seems like the world has completely stopped. Just by looking into his eyes, you feel safe, like no one in the world could hurt you. All your fears and worries are just gone when Jeongguk is with you. “I know that things have been different between us lately, but I want to start over again with you.”

And that’s enough to press the reset button between you two.

________

High school parties were always busted within two hours in your small hometown, always being ratted out by angry, jealous people who weren’t invited to the party. It was really a rare occasion for parties to be thrown, so when four boys are presented with an opportunity to rent a cabin forty minutes away from your hometown to throw a Halloween costume party, they couldn’t help but to take it. 

“And why does this party interest me?” It’s been two months since you pressed the reset with Jeongguk. He’s doing his best, trying to do everything he can to make you feel at ease as you apply to colleges, preparing the next part of your life. Sometimes, there’s some awkwardness when he walks you to class or picks you up to go to school, but the two of you are moving forward.

“Come on, we can finally go to a party and have some fun without having to worry if the cops are going to show up,” Adelaide whines, desperately wanting to go. 

“All those boys are making a guest list and are making you pay to get in,” you remind her, still having no interest. “That party is going to get busted within an hour.”

“Only one way to find out,” she teases. “I heard Jeongguk’s going.” 

“He doesn’t go to parties.” And it’s the truth. He’s too afraid of getting caught, so he only drinks alone, with family, or close friends where no one has their phone out. 

“I heard he lost a bet so he has to DD for Max.” 

And although Jeongguk has been telling you everything lately, he doesn’t tell you about the bet, and you wish you knew the reason why. You give him a week, before giving in to the party. 

He’s about to tell you about the bet he lost over text when he walks into the cabin, with a white paper sign “DD” taped onto his black windbreaker, but somehow, he gets a feeling that you’re here. He looks around the crowded, loud cabin to find your eyes, already looking at his. 

It’s weird how even in the most chaotic atmospheres, if and when he walks into the room, you just know, and your eyes would just suddenly meet his. 

“Told you so,” Adelaide says, taking another sip of her drink. “Are you going to talk to confront him?”

“There’s nothing to confront him about, because he’s not obligated to tell me everything in his life.” But a small part of you wish he did. 

And for some reason, there’s a feeling in his chest that’s telling him to go up to you and give you some sort of bullshit explanation on why he didn’t tell you about the party, but at the same time, he wants to ask why you’re there, and why you didn’t tell him you were coming. 

Maybe if he had known you were coming, the two of you could have carpooled. He would at least see you that night and make sure you were okay if you went with him. 

Before anyone could do anything, the colors red, blue, white start flashing outside the cabin window, and suddenly, the music is turned off and everyone is starting to rush outside as quickly as they can, afraid of the outcome if they were to be caught.

Although you didn’t consume anything, you didn’t want to be the only person found inside with all the unknown drugs and alcoholic beverages, trying to give the officers a reasonable explanation. You rush outside, following everyone else into the woods, accidentally separating yourself from Adelaide in the process.

“Oh god,” you mumbled to yourself as you go deeper into the woods following a group in front of you, trying to move as quietly as they can by avoiding to step in pile of leaves.

“Hey, come here, and we’ll hide,” one person in front of you says. Their voice is familiar, but you couldn’t tell who it belonged to because of the darkness. “But be careful.” 

As you get closer to the group, you want to turn back, give yourself in to the police, taking all the blame once you realize it’s Sydney, her drunken friends and Jeongguk all huddling down by a couple of trees, almost a mile away from the cabin. 

“Y/N?” He questions, unsure if it’s really you.

“Shhh,” one of Sydney’s friends hushes. “They might be coming.”

But Jeongguk doesn’t care. Making a bunch of noise by stepping on the leaves, he goes to you and tries to look into your eyes. It’s dark, but he can see a glimpse of them from the moonlight. “Are you okay?”

“Can you shut up, Jeongguk?” Sydney whispers angrily. “Why can’t you stop talking just for once?”

Not wanting to argue with any drunk girls, you silently nod, not bothering to ask Jeongguk the same question. You start to rub your arms, trying to keep yourself warm, waiting for the clear that everyone could go back to the cabin, grab their shit and go home. 

“Here.” Still, making all the noise in the world, Jeongguk takes off his black windbreaker and pushes the windbreaker onto your head. He’s pulling it down, saying, “You need it more than I do.”

Sighing, you’re putting the windbreaker on. It wasn’t until after you are finished when you notice a sudden white circle moving around and coming your way, causing Sydney and her friends to get up running further north. 

You think it’s the end, that you would be caught in the woods, but Jeongguk reacts faster than you, pulling your wrist and runs forward with them, so the both of you aren’t caught. “I’m not leaving you behind.” 

“I can’t believe we’re spending more time here in the woods than at the party,” you mumble under your breath, trying to make light of the situation. “The wolves are going to get us, Guk.” 

He couldn’t believe you were making a joke in this situation, but despite that, he replies, “Even then, you have me.” 

His words take you back to an old memory. 

A little after the end of football season, you spent your time studying for your AP Lit exam at the school library, cramming vocabulary words and definitions into your head. Right around seven, you planned to go home, but your car wouldn’t start from the cold weather. 

You called your parents to help you out, to start your car, but they were out of town, thirty minutes away, meaning you were stuck in the cold. 

Checking the time, you saw Jeongguk had texted you earlier. 

[guk:)] are you still at the library?

why, what’s up

[guk:)] once you finally filled your brain with those big words, you should fill that stomach up 

haha wdym

[guk:)] let’s eat out 

i would :( but my car isn’t starting, waiting for my parents to come 

[guk:)] aren’t your parents out of town 

[guk:)] bruh, i’m going to get you. stay in your car until i come

Even though it was a twenty minute drive, he made it in ten. As soon as he saw you, he quickly got out of his car, wrapping a black and white plaid-pattern blanket around you, and then quickly opened the hood of your car, connecting wires to connect to his. 

“You know you didn’t have to do this,” you reminded him, watching him as he tried to start your car. “I honestly could have waited for my parents.” 

“You have me,” he said, smiling as he finally got your car to start. “You always have me.

He drove all the way there to make sure you were okay, that you were able to get home safe, but at the time, you never thought any of it till now. Was it happening all over again?

For some reason, it all hurts. 

If he’s so into Sydney, why is he helping you? Why isn’t he helping her? Why is he being like this?

You wonder if he feels some obligation to help you, that he thinks you are helpless, that you need to be saved, and the thinking just makes you hurt. 

______

“Do you think you can help me with my rhetoric paper?” Jeongguk asks as he takes you to school.

It’s been a couple weeks since the party, and Jeongguk is still putting a lot of effort into trying to put your friendship to the way it was, but sometimes, he’ll slip and ask way too many questions about the assignment he missed because he was too high to pay attention. The other times he’ll bring gummy worms for the both of you to share in class together and pick you up to take you to school, making sure he gets some alone time with you even if it’s just a ten minute car ride.

With winter break and finals coming in a couple days, Jeongguk decides to use his free time and spend the night prior at your house, watching the Harry Potter movie marathon with you.

“Yeah, sure. When is it due?” 

"Tonight.” He gives you a quick glance, trying to give you a smile, but he sees the death glare you give him. “And I haven’t started.”

"Is it the compare and contrast paper?” He nods, finally pulling up to the school parking lot. “I’ll help you during our free period. It can’t be that hard, right?” 

“It’s a good thing we watched the movies last night, because I’m just going to compare them to the books.” 

Jeongguk has rhetoric right before your free period, and with a guilty look on his face, he sits next to you with his laptop open. 

“Well, at least, you have some things down.” Your tone comes out flat as you look through the three pages Jeongguk has. There’s a bunch of errors in the body of the paper, but still he put “working on” in the space where the introduction, thesis and conclusion is supposed to be. 

“Am I just dumb?” He asks once you take the laptop away, fixing his grammar. 

“No. You know how to convey your points, but you’re just in a rush,” you say, trying to reassure him, changing his sentence. “Here, I’ll fix all your grammar stuff, and you read it over to make sure it makes sense. The conclusion and thesis should be easy to do later.” 

When the bell rings, Jeongguk’s face drops; the two of you hadn’t even had time to work on what he needed help with. You had just barely got done editing the body of his paper. “Oh no.” 

“Jeongguk, we can just work on this after the game.” 

“I really wanted to go to formal though.” Since finals were next week, the school hosts their annual winter formal right after the game. It wasn’t the kind where you dress up and come with dates. It was just ‘show up in whatever you were wearing earlier and come with friends to grind with everyone in a circle. “I heard there’s going to be some spicy drama and I want to watch.” 

“I guess we can work on it before the game. I’ll meet you in the study room by the locker rooms at like 5:30ish,” you say. 

“You’re the best!” He gives you a quick hug. “I better get to class.” 

The two of you meet in the study room in time, working on Jeongguk’s assignment, trying to make him understand how to write an introduction and his thesis. His eyes glistened as he listens to you, making your heart skip a beat. He looks at you like he wanted you, you thought.

“And submit! Thank you, Y/N,” He screams excitedly. You’re happy to see Jeongguk smile, but you shut your eyes for a moment, feeling a headache coming. “Are you okay?”

You nod, but before you could say anything else, a teammate of Jeongguk walks in, telling Jeongguk to get ready for the game. “I’ll see you later at formal?” He asks, standing up, giving you a questionable look, waiting for your answer. His teammate is getting annoyed, telling Jeongguk to hurry up once again, but he stays in the hall, wanting to hear what you were going to say. 

Forcing a smile, you nod in response, and he smiles, finally going to the locker room to get ready for the game. 

He perfectly makes all the goals in the game. He looks for you in the crowd, wanting to see your smile and cheers after each goal he makes, but you’re not there. It’s the first time you’re missing a game, and it hurts. He leads the team to a victory, but with you gone, he feels like it’s his biggest loss. 

“You missed a really good game and a really boring formal,” Sam, Adelaide’s boyfriend, says as you take a seat across from him and Adelaide. Since the start of the hockey season, the three of you made it a tradition to eat at the local taco place downtown after every game. 

“Guk texted me about the game.” You pucker your lower lip out, pouting, grabbing a menu from the middle of the table. “Of course the one time I skip the game to take a nap, they freaking won.” 

“Yeah he was on fire, but too bad it wasn’t like that at formal,” Sam roasts.

“What happened at formal?” The couple looks at each other, knowing how you would react if they tell you. “Tell me.”

“Sydney literally told everyone to dance with her, so she oculd avoid JEongguk but he kept following her like a little lost puppy,” Sam explains. “But at the end, Jeongguk still went to her kickback party thing.

“I don’t get him,” Adelaide says, scanning the menu. “He tries so hard fro you, Y/N. If you’re not happy, he’s not happy, but then he pulls this shit with Sydney. Like make it make sense.” 

“He sees me as his sister,” you enunciate, putting lots of emphasis on the word sister.

“He literally looks at you as if you put the stars in the sky. I don’t think he looks at his own sister in that way,” your friend argues. “His perspective and mind ahs been clouded ever since, and he just doesn’t know.”

Before you could respond, your phone on the table vibrates; Jeongguk’s contact photo pops onto the phone screen: taken after the last football game of your sophomore year, you’re on Jeongguk’s back, throwing your head back, laughing as he smiles into the camera. You remember being so proud of Jeongguk, earning his varsity spot and playing so well despite being a freshman. 

Sliding to answer his call, you put your phone to your ear, and all you hear is music blasting and people screaming. He probably drunk dialed you, so you press the red end call button. 

Right as you hang up, you get a text.

[guk] can u come get me please

Within ten minutes, you park your car a few feet away from Sydney’s house, waiting for your best friend to come out of the house. 

From a distance, you couldn’t even tell if Jeongguk was drunk. As a matter of fact, seeing him walk towards your car makes you want to cry because he looks like the exact same person you first met in driver’s education, the one that looked like he wanted to change the world, the one who put his heart and head into everything he did.

But when Jeongguk stumbles into your car, struggling to put on his seatbelt, your heart drops. If anyone saw him the way he is now, no one would believe that this is the exact same Jeon Jeongguk who broke all those records, the one raised from elite Jeon family. No one would believe that he, out of all people, would fall into the temptations of alcohol and drugs. They would judge him for his actions that didn’t affect anyone but himself. Everyone would be so ashamed of him, when he did nothing wrong; he just did everything to distract the pain from his heart and mind.

Swallowing whatever was in your throat, you reach over to buckle his seatbelt and look at him. "Are you okay?” 

Not wanting to meet your eyes, he puts his right elbow on the window ledge, covering his face into his right hand. Jeongguk couldn’t bear to look at you in the eyes and see the look of disappointment or heartache. He thinks it’s better to close his eyes anyways. Seeing nothing except black wouldn’t make him throw up in the car he knew you desperately loved. “Please, just go.”

“Did you fucking suck on batteries at her house or do you think I’m that stupid to drive when you’re in this state?” In any other situation, the both of you would laugh, and he would response with a joke, matching your tone, but in that moment, the only thing that goes through your mind is Jeongguk’s well being. 

“You’re not stupid,” he speaks so abruptly. “You’re never stupid.”

You continue to stare at him, wondering if he is being serious. “This isn’t about me. What’s wrong?” 

“I feel like you’re the only one in my life that considers my feelings,” he admits in a small voice. He’s tired and about to pass out from everything he consumed from the party, but he tries to stay conscious to talk to you. He wants to talk to you about everything, but he doesn’t know where to start. “Thank you for checking up on me. You always do it, and it means so much.” 

“Guk, talk to me,” you plead using the same quiet tone he used. “What’s on your mind?” 

“Her.” Einstein’s definition of insanity, was doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results. Although you knew his answer, you just thought that maybe if you had asked him one more time, his answer would change, but it didn’t; you were insane to think it would. “All I can think about is her.” 

The habit of randomly holding and playing with his hand comes back naturally, reaching out to hold his free hand, thumb stroking over his knuckles as you debate with yourself on what to say next. “Why?”

“As dumb as it sounds, I really think she is the one for me.” He sighs quietly, not wanting to admit it out loud. “She has to be the one if she was able to break the barrier I had down.” 

He meant no harm in his words, but they hurt and cut you like a knife stabbed in the back. Jeongguk is your best friend; he’s supposed to feel like he can tell you anything no matter what, but it seems like he didn’t from what he is saying. 

“I hate seeing you hurt, Guk,” you whisper so softly that he could barely hear you. “Is she really worth all this pain?” 

"I know I should just give up, that it’s not worth it, that she’s not worth it. But even with all these dumb mixed signals and her leading me on all the time, I just want this to work.” He lets out a humorless laugh, trying to lighten the mood. “God, I am so fucked up right now.”

“You’re not okay.” 

He sniffles. “I’m so alone.” 

“Why do you think that?” You were now just holding his hand, angling your head, trying to meet Jeongguk’s eyes, but he still buried his face into his hand. 

In a low voice, he says, “Everyone leaves me.” 

Taken back from his comment, you tilt your head at him. “I never left you.”

“Not you.” Finally, he turns his head to you, staring back into your eyes, tears streaming down his face. 

In the past three years you’ve known Jeongguk, you’ve never seen him cry. Of course you’ve seen him be vulnerable with his feelings and have raw emotions, but he never cried, not even when he got surgery and couldn’t do what he loved most for fuck’s sake. You remember that he told you the last time he cried was at his grandfather’s funeral six years ago. 

So when you see him crying silently with tears running down his face in your car, you know he really was at his breaking point, and Sydney had taken a big toll on him. 

“You’re always here for me, and I promise I’ll always be there for you.” A part of you wants to chuckle, because of course, your best friend wants to comfort you when he feels like hell, but you nod and hold his hand tighter.

He squeezes back. “Always.” 

“I’m so sorry.” 

“For what?” 

“I’m not a good son to my parents. I’m not a good brother to my siblings. I’m not a good friend, especially to you. I’m sorry for everything. For being the way I am. For being such a selfish jerk. For hurting and lying to everyone. I’m so sorry.” 

You’re taken back when you hear him say the word you’ve desperately wanted to hear for so long. Sure, Jeongguk made many mistakes in the past three years, but he never really apologized to anyone. He’s the type of person who would nod to acknowledge he was wrong, or he would just shrug, and change the topic to keep his pride. He would say everything, but the word, sorry. 

But even after everything, you didn’t know what to say, because how were you supposed to tell him that even after everything, even when he’s a new person, even when he still has feelings for someone else, even when he is a selfish jerk sometimes, even when he breaks your heart, you will always pick him.

It will always be him. 

______

“I promise I’ll see you right after the game, so we can get our last baseball picture together.” Jeongguk pinky promises you and seals it with his thumb before he goes to the dugout to get ready and warm up for the game. 

But after the game, he talks to Sydney for a bit and then head in the direction of his car, getting ready to go home and rest. He completely breaks your promise, and it breaks your heart. 

You cried all the way home.

It wasn’t until after midnight where he suddenly remembers, and he’s leaning against your balcony door, quietly knocking as he tries to get your attention as you ignored all his texts, calls and voicemails. “Talk to me.”

Eventually, you get up to open the balcony door. Jeongguk comes in and awkwardly stands by the door as you sit back down on your bed, looking down at your hands.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N.” He’s never seen you so sad with red puffy eyes before. “How do I make it up to you?” 

"Guk, I can’t do this anymore,” you whisper.

“Do what?” 

“I have this feeling that if I stopped talking to you, you would move on in life while I’ll be hurt, because I’m the one that’d be losing you.”

“You know that’s not true,” he denies. “You know I would be lost without you.”

“Do I?” You ask, finally meeting his eyes, and he wants to fall apart. Your eyes always shine, but when he looks at them, it was like a star had died. “One minute you care, and then the next, I’m being blown off because you rather get high than spend time with me.” 

“Y/N.” For the first time, you didn’t like how he said your name. The way his tone was coming off as a warning. He knew what was coming, but he was in no way prepared for it. He hopes the conversation ends all here, because he knows if it doesn’t, everything will end here.

It all hurts.

“I asked you that one night what did you really think of me, and you never answered, and I still don’t know. How do you feel about me, Jeongguk? Please tell me.” 

Jeongguk fucked up. He really did. 

His heart breaks when he hears your voice crack all over the place. He just wants to wrap his arms around you, tell you that everything is okay, that he feels that same, but he couldn’t. The two of you are staring at each other, water both filling both your eyes. “You’re my best friend, you know that.” 

You shake your head, peeling your eyes away from his. “I don’t think I can be just friends anymore.” The word comes out so awkwardly and unnatural, because you don’t even know if you were friends or when you had stopped being friends with Jeongguk.

“Give me time, and I can make this right.” You thought he was going to fight for you, for your friendship, but he doesn’t. “I will make it right one day..I just want you to talk to me again when you’re ready.”

After everything, there were so many times where you knew, he felt what you were feeling too, and it was hell to know it. But despite that, you had to find someone else to feel this way about. 

______

Skipping graduation, you quickly accept an offer to study abroad, leaving everything you know to pursue your dream of traveling to new places and meeting new people after your confession to Jeongguk. 

There were numerous times where your thoughts sometimes drift to Jeongguk, wondering what he’s up to, wondering where’s applying for school, what he’s thinking about, but you don’t let those thoughts simmer in your mind for too long. As much as you wanted to know, you know that missing him was doing more harm. You want to move on and be happy on your own, finally not longing for someone that was no longer in your life.

It isn’t until a year later, you come back home for the summer, wanting to see all your friends and family again. 

“My baby!” Adelaide screams, wrapping her arms around you, practically squeezing the life out of you. “You’re finally back home.” 

Now finally legal to drink, Adelaide decides to throw a kickback the weekend her parents are gone, inviting most of her local college friends and some of her childhood friends.

“Were you waiting for me?” You tease, chuckling, hugging her back. “I missed you so much.”

“Do you want something to drink?” Not even giving you a second to respond, she passes a red cup filled with some liquor to you. She bumps it to hers, toasting. “Drink!”

Instead, you get a feeling in your gut, telling you to search around your house. Your eyes wander around the room, meeting a pair of eyes that screamed “I’m going to change your life.” You want to laugh because even after all this time, your eyes still find his, and you still feel the same. All your worries disappear just by looking at him. 

How is it possible that you still feel this way when he broke your heart?

It’s your first time seeing him in a year, and it still hurts. 

His lips part, but he presses them together quickly, not saying a word. He sighs, running his hand through his brown hair, not knowing if he should go over and talk to you. He doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable if he goes up to you, but he doesn’t want you to make the first move. 

But you do it anyway. 

Taking the opportunity, you motion him to go to the backyard where the two of you could have a private conversation on one of Adelaide’s bench. He takes a seat next to you, leaving some space. 

“You look good,” he says so nonchalantly. And he means it. “You look so happy.” And he’s in awe. 

“Thanks.” His heart stings a bit when you refuse to look at him and continue to stare at your hands in your lap. It’s his first time seeing you like this, so apathetic and cold, but he knows he deserves it.

“How have you been?” His voice is still as soft as you remember. 

Annoyed, you shake your head, not liking how he was acting like nothing has changed, as if you haven’t talked in a year, as if everything is perfectly okay. “Let’s cut the crap, what do you want from me?” 

He chuckles lightly, angling his head to look at you. “You still haven’t changed.” 

"Don’t waste my time,” you caution him. “I’m giving you a chance, so you use it wisely.”

“I missed you.” The way he says it so easily,  like it is true, makes you get up from the bench, walking away from him. Three steps forward, and he makes you stop dead in your track when he says, “I should have told you I loved you that night.” 

Even though he doesn’t tell you what night, you know what night he was referring to: the night you told him you loved him on your balcony. 

“I should have told you, and it’s killed me everyday since then.” He’s using the same tone he did when you picked him up from Sydney's. The only difference this time is he isn’t drunk. He’s completely sober and genuinely means everything he says.

“You can’t walk back into my life and suddenly realize you have feelings for me when I should hate you after everything.” Although your back was facing him, he knows you’re trying really hard not to cry. “You can’t.” 

“I didn’t suddenly realize after everything,” he speaks so fast that his words are barely tangible. “I knew I loved you then, and I still love you now.” 

“If you loved me then, you wouldn’t have thrown me away like I meant nothing. All this time I had to wonder what I did wrong for you to do that to me.”

"You didn’t do anything wrong..I wanted you so much, but I couldn’t say it back that day because it wasn’t fair for the both of us. I know it hurt being my friend, seeing me be a mess, getting drunk and high everyday, but it hurt being yours too.” 

So many thoughts and questions wander through your head. Did he rehearse this everyday? Did he know all this time, or did he use this whole year, figuring out his feelings and how to put them into words?

“At my worst, you still looked at me, supported me and loved me. Despite all my flaws, you saw past it and saw the potential I had even after everything. But it tore me apart because you didn’t deserve that and I wanted to be the person you truly wanted and deserve, not someone you took pity on.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” You ask in a small voice. “Did I not deserve to know the truth? Was it worth hurting me? In the end, if that’s how you really felt, you wouldn’t have wanted us to be where we are at now.” 

“I didn’t tell you because I wanted to be the better version of myself, and I am so sorry that it took me so long to finally get there.. I’m sorry that in this process, I’ve hurt you. I just thought that maybe, if I pulled myself away from you, I could get over you, but god, it hurt me and hurt me even more when you let me pull away.”

You couldn’t help, but to finally talk back. “I pulled away because I wanted you to be happy, to make your own choices, but some of them stopped involving me.”

“I know, and that is completely my fault,” he rushes to say. “I just thought that if I convinced myself to like someone else, you would finally get someone you truly deserved, but at the end of the day, I still belonged to you.” 

“Is that it?”

“I told you that night, to talk to me when you’re ready, and I still mean it.”

In a low voice, you ask, “And if I’m never ready?” 

“That’s okay.” But it all hurts for him to think that this might be the last time he’ll ever talk to you. “But know that I would wait a lifetime for you, because in the end, it will always be you.” 

_______

“He said that?” It’s been a couple weeks since the party, and you finally tell Adelaide the whole story between you and Jeongguk. Since then, he’s all you had been thinking about, and you want it to stop. “Wow.”

“Yeah,” you agree, wanting to cry. “When he told me, he wanted me back, I thought I could never handle that, and I still don’t.”

“I honestly don’t know what to tell you,” she confesses. “Because as much as I wanted the two of you together, you without him, is the happiest I’ve ever seen you. And I hate for that to just disappear over a guy who finally is ready for you when he should have been ready a long time ago.” 

“I know.”

And you do. 

You’ve learned that you couldn’t make Jeongguk be ready for what you were ready for, and at the same time, you weren’t obligated to wait around for him to make up his mind.

“I didn’t deserve what he put me through.”

“But now that he’s better, you don’t want to ever miss the opportunity to finally have him.” Adelaide understands you perfectly. “You still like him, right?”

“I don’t know,” you say. “Every time I thought about him, I always distracted myself, so I wouldn’t. Over time, I just stopped thinking about him to finally move on.”

“Just like what happened, time will tell.” 

_______

Then for the new few days, you feel a feeling in your heart, wanting to go somewhere. The problem is you didn’t exactly know where to go, so you end up spending almost hundred dollars worth of gas, driving circles and rectangles around your small hometown, polluting the earth, trying to figure out where you want to go. 

You’re so angry that you want to give up and scream so loud, so you can finally release all the stress out of your system. 

Luckily for you, you know a place where you could do that. 

Heading in the baseball dugout, you get startled when you see Jeongguk sitting on the ground, eating a peanut butter sandwich with a bunch of empty tupperware and empty gummy worm bags all around him. “Y/N?”

Just by looking at him, you should hate him and resent him for everything he put you through, but you don’t. Instead, you look feel like you’re at home, in peace where no one could ever hurt you.

“I’m ready.” With a mouthful of bread in his mouth, he gives you a look, asking if you were sure. “I’m ready.

He gets up abruptly, knocking the tupperware near him into a distance, making you laugh, wanting this for the rest of your life.

“I love you.” Jeongguk takes a step forward, and another, closing the space between you. “Let me prove it to you that I’ll love you forever, right this time.”

“I know you will, Guk.”

______

based on the cliches of my life, the what ifs and what should have been, all my raw feelings - i hope i can finally let you go now // i did post this earlier, deleting it and now republished it without looking through the errors 

too young || seven

summary: another hospital visit brings you and jungkook together again.

word count: 1485

genre:  parent!au, single dad!jungkook angst

one || two || three || four || five || six || seven

“Do you want to explain what happened here?” Your mom asked with a look of disgust on her face, examining all the boxes of Chinese takeout boxes all over the kitchen island, paper plates overfilling the trashcan, definitely leaving a distinct odor of grease. “Or should I ask the rats next door?” 

“Real funny, Mom.” You chuckled, turning on the lights for your apartment. “I didn’t know you would be coming up to visit, or otherwise, I think this place would have been cleaner than Marie Kondo’s house.” 

“Well, I was a little worried. You hadn’t picked up my calls for a couple of days.” Your mom takes a seat on your black leather couch, patting the spot next to her. “Come and sit by me. I’ve missed my only child and want to make sure you’re okay.

“Of course, I am okay,” you said, sighing as you took a seat next to her. “There’s no reason for me to be not okay.” 

She raised her eyebrows at you. “Right because seeing Jungkook at the hospital was definitely something to be okay about.”

“I have been a little busy.” It wasn’t a complete lie. 

The last time you had spoken to your mom you had briefly texted her about the whole hospital situation and how you unintentionally ran into Jungkook. She tried calling numerous times after that, but you never picked up. You drowned yourself back into work, not wanting to think about your personal life, barely cooking, eating and showering. 

“Yeah I can tell,” she joked, laughing. “Kiddo, you know it’s okay to cry. You don’t have to hold it all together.” 

“What is there to cry about?” Shrugging your shoulders, you gave a small smile, not wanting any feeling of despair to show on your face. “I’m fine, really.” 

“So you didn’t like him?” 

“Of course I liked him! But come on, sometimes you just have to walk away right?” Your mom was one of the supportive people in the world, but there were times where she would always use logic and tell you to change your path. At the casino, she saw how gambling and not being able to walk away broke people. People had a hard time to let go of things or even people, but you felt conditioned to feel like it was better to walk away.

“Okay.” She nodded slowly. “What are you walking away from?”

“Him.” 

“But didn’t he tell you that he chose you?” 

Your conversation with Jungkook at the hospital replays in your head once more. He told you that he didn’t want you to be Sarah, and that he loved you for the way you were. You were the one who saw him as an individual and gave him the opportunities to prove what a great guardian he could be. You didn’t pity him for sacrificing everything for Jules, but admired him and his heart. 

But at the end of the day, you still weren’t Sarah. 

He never did all those things for you, and you didn’t know what it all meant. 

He kept that information about Sarah private, as if he had something to hide, as if it were true at one point of time. 

“I rather be alone than to not know where I truly stand in his life.” 

She smiled. “But that’s the thing, Kiddo. You always take the risk. Don’t let fear and insecurity stop you now and deprive you of happiness.” 

“But Mom-” You opened your mouth, but no words left. You knew she was right, and it was almost the exact same thing you told Jungkook when he asked you why did you agree to get to know him. “You know I can be happy being alone.” 

“I do, but I also know you were happy with him too.” Her mom instincts kicked in, because even though you did not say anything, she wrapped her arms around you, knowing you needed a hug from the person you knew and loved you. “Misunderstandings happen.”

“I know,” you softly cried. 

“Even if you don’t take the risk, sometimes luck comes into your life.”

Before you could respond to her, your phone started to ring in your back pocket. Pulling away, you wiped your face, making sure there was no visible tears streaming down your face. 

“Who is calling you this late at night?” Your mom asked. 

Grabbing the phone out of your pocket, you shook your head in disbelief after looking at the screen. You handed the phone to her. She looked down and saw the name flashing across the screen: Jungkook. 

"I told you so,” your mom teased, playfully pushing you to the side. “Do you want me to stay or go to the other room?”

“Please stay.” 

You slid to answer the call and pressed the speaker button. 

"Y/N?” He said in a strained voice. “Can you come to the hospital right now? I really need you.” 

_______

Rushing through the hospital doors, you instantly lock eyes with Jungkook, automatically wrapping your arms around him. 

Jungkook sobbed in your arms, speaking so fast that you could barely understand a word he was saying. You could only make out Jules and soccer for the most part. Most of his words were incoherent between the heavy pants and breathes.

“I’m here, Kook. I’m here. I’m here.” You repeated. “It’s okay. I’m here.” 

He held onto you a little tighter, afraid it might be the last time he could do this. “I’m sorry.” 

Pulling away slightly, you looked up at him. His eyes were full of water, making it seem like he could cry forever and the tears could never stop. With your left thumb, you caress his wet cheek, not saying a word.

When Jungkook finally has his breathing under control, he took a deep breath. “Jules had an injury at her soccer game. She ended up tripping on her teammate’s shoe laces and her body had just slammed into the goal post.”

“Did she hit her head?”

“The doctors are looking at her now. It’s worse than a sprained ankle, so she might have fractured or broken her ankle. She could have also tore her knee muscles or something as she still is growing, you know? That’s how it works, right?” He started rambling. “Oh god, what if she can never walk again? Why did I let her play soccer? What if she is in more pain at the doctors? What if they take away Jules away from me?”

“That is not going to happen,” you snapped. “I won’t let that happen.” 

“But how do you know?” 

“You turned your whole life around for Jules, someone who isn’t even your own child. You have given her everything, and the thing is, the world isn’t perfect. Sometimes it is cruel and things like this happen. But one incident, mistake, or whatever, will not make anyone take Jules from you. And it does not define you.” 

His body softened in comfort. “And I thought I had to be the one good with words.” 

You released a small laugh. “I’m an educator, bro.”

Finally, he pulled away, looking down at you. “Thank you for being here.” 

“Anything for Jules,” you said. “Anything for you.”

It isn’t hours later until the doctors come get you and Jungkook from the waiting room. The doctors explained that they performed a procedure to put wires in her ankle bones to help her heal. The surgery happened without a problem, but they had kept her for a while without visitors to monitor her and let her rest. 

They had let you and Jungkook come in when Jules had briefly woke up. 

“Y/N!” Jules’s eyes sparkled once she saw you. “You’re here.” 

“How are you feeling?” You asked sitting down to her left as Jungkook sat on the child to her right. “I’m sorry I couldn’t watch the game.”

She chuckled. “I’m glad you didn’t see me fall.” 

“It’s okay, Jules. I recorded it,” Jungkook joked, taking her small hand to his mouth, giving her small kisses. 

“When can we go home?” She asked.

“Soon,” he promised. “Soon, but for now, get some rest, okay. I want you to be okay.” 

“I’m okay,” she replied. “Can you just sing the songs for her?” 

“Not now.” 

“Please,” she begged. “I’m the one in the hospital bed.” 

Jungkook turned his head to look at you. He smiled slightly, looked back at Jules and caressed her hair. “The mp3 isn’t here.” 

They brought up the mp3 player once again, leaving you confused. “Why do you need it?” 

“I recorded your favorite book for you to listen to, so whenever you miss me, you can just listen to it.” He stared at you with his beaming eyes, not wanting to look at anything else but you. “There’s about 30 songs on there. And I sang all of them. And they’re all about you.”

_______

hi i want to apologize because it has been SO LONG maybe 2 years(?) that i have written. tldr; i struggled during undergrad but now i graduated and will be taking a gap year and want to continue writing :) 

it is crazy how i started this in high school and now i have graduated college! my writing has gotten so much better i promise. but also sorry because i want better and too young done asap so not proofread and not written the best it could be 

too young | eight

summary: jungkook proves to everyone that he cares about you and his daughter, jules the most. 

word count: 3,083

genre:  parent!au, single dad!jungkook fluff

one || two || three || four || five || six || seven || eight 

“Do you know what time Jungkook is getting here?” Jules asked, sitting down on one of the office chairs. Without any hesitation, she undid her braid quickly and started messing up her hair. “Or is someone else supposed to take me?”

“Didn’t lunch just start for you?” You looked at the clock behind you, the long black minute hand just reaching the same place as the short hour mark. “I’m sure he will be here soon.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if he forgot,” she mumbled under her breath.

“He’s coming,” you assured Jules. “Be patient.”

“But are you sure he’s coming?” Unlike the first time you met Jules, she looked at you with a look of confusion on her face. She was clenching the white straps of her purple backpack as if she was afraid to lose the bag. Jules had been in your office for at least five minutes, asking every thirty seconds to ask if her guardian was here. “What if he forgot, again?”

“He didn’t forget.” It used to be normal for Jungkook to be late whether that be ten minutes or an hour and a half. You remember how nonchalant and unimpressed Jules used to be when you told her one of her uncles was on her way instead of her guardian. “Why are you in such a rush?”

“Because I want this stupid thing off now!” She gestured to the black ankle brace. It had been a month since the hospital visit and Jules had been counting the days she could go back on the field to play soccer. She reached to take one of the velcro straps off on her brace. “Do you know how annoying this has been?”

“Hey!” you exclaimed. “You know you aren’t allowed to take it off before your appointment. The doctor needs to make sure it has healed correctly and everything. Then, the doctor will take it off for you.”

“By the time he gets here, the doctor’s office will be closed until next year,” she pouted, placing her hands back onto the backpack straps. “Why can’t Uncle Tae get me? Why can’t you take me to the doctor?”

“Because I’m at school,” you deadpanned. “And I want to be here.”

“I do too. You can just take me,” she whined.

“No, I can’t.” You couldn’t help to roll your eyes. "Because Jungkook is coming.”

“Yeah, right.” Jules threw back her head in frustration and groaned loudly. “Then where is he?”

“Right behind you,” Jungkook said, appearing with a smile on his face. “Are you ready, Kiddo?”

Without saying a word, Jules got up on her two feet and rolled her eyes. Still holding onto the straps of her bag tightly, she first looked out of the office, staring at the kids in the cafeteria as if she were searching for someone specific. She then in a haste left the office, stomping her feet on the ground, making her footsteps heard through the entire building.

“This is the first time I’ve seen her with an attitude.” You and Jungkook both looked at each other, realizing you guys both said the same thing at the same time.

“Did something happen between you guys this morning?” You asked. “Was she like this before school?”

“She seemed fine this morning when I dropped her off at school,” he replied, crunching his eyebrows together. “She was super excited for her appointment today, so maybe her excitement just turned into anger...Right? Kids and their emotions these days.”

But even before, on the days when Jungkook told Jules that he would pick her up and he still didn’t show, Jules never showed any sign of any anger or displeasure. She stayed patient, understanding that even if Jungkook didn’t come, she would always see him at home.

“Why did she think you weren’t going to show up though?”

Before he could say anything, Jungkook’s phone started going off, ringing so loudly that he jumped a bit. He reached into his right beige trenchcoat pocket and pulled out his phone, showing you the screen: Jules was calling.

“Did she say anything to you earlier?” He asked.

“Just that she wanted her brace off,” you confirmed his suspicions. “Maybe it’s nothing, and we’re just thinking too hard about it.”

_________

It was not nothing.

It was definitely something.

Something was off.

Ever since her doctor’s appointment, Jules has tried to convince Jungkook that she was sick and could not go to school. He allowed it for the first day and the second day, but when she asked for a third and then a fourth, he started to think something was going on. Every time Jungkook asked about school, Jules stayed quiet, saying nothing, yet it was louder than what could have been said. During the last week you had seen her, she would always change the subject whenever school was brought up and would ask you to convince Jungkook to not let her go.

“Have you heard anything from school? Teachers? Students?” Jungkook asked over the phone. It had been a week since she got her brace off, and he was worried. He had kept calling you every day during this time always to ask if you had heard anything about Jules and her change in behavior.  “Why doesn’t she want to go to school?”

“Jungkook, no kid really wants to go to school,” you guessed, scratching the back of your neck. “She’s a kid. Maybe, the only thing on her mind is soccer and she wasn’t able to do that for a while.”

“Yeah but Jules never had a problem in school and always enjoyed learning,” he replied. “I just don’t get why she’s avoiding school like it's the plague.”

Sighing, you think about the last time Jules had been in your office and how she was so agitated, maybe even apprehensive about whether or not Jungkook was going to arrive and take her to her appointment. “Well, the last time she was in my office, she told me she had wanted to be at school.”

“Really?”

You winced. “I mean, I said that I couldn’t take her to the appointment because I wanted to stay at school, and she agreed before asking if you were going to pick her up?”

“Wait, she asked you that?” Jungkook was taken aback, sounding like he was offended by what you said. “Why would she think that?”

“Have you been picking her up?” You questioned. “The boys haven’t been picking her up?

“I have been picking her up from school every day,” he answered back. “I haven’t been really late either. But you know how it is with every parent wanting to pick up their kid. The line is so long so I am always going to be the last one there just because I can’t get out of work earlier.”

“Really?” Usually five minutes after class ends, Jules would always come to your office and make herself at home. “I thought you'd been picking her up earlier because she hasn’t come by to my office to see me this week or last week at all.”

“Not even for lunch?” He asked.

“Nope.”

“Are we just being pushy?” Despite not having a face-to-face conversation, you could tell Jungkook was disheartened, thinking what he could have done wrong to upset Jules, for her to act this way. “Maybe she wanted to do something different.”

“That can be true,” you reluctantly answered, releasing a slow sigh. “But let’s think about it, Kook. She’s never lied to you before, especially about this kind of stuff.”

“And she tells you everything too.” His voice trails off into silence. “Does she usually have lunch with you today?”

You answered, “On Fridays at 12 usually.”

“But it’s 1:45,” he replied slowly. “Did she not eat today?”

Your head snapped to the clock hanging on the wall. The time was indeed past the time you usually saw Jules. “I must have lost track of the time. But I had been in my office all day, so I don’t know why she didn’t come in. She comes sometimes and eats in silence if she sees me working.”

“Something is wrong.”

“Hey, I gotta go.” A staff member from the fifth-grade department had knocked on your door. She was hired around the same time you were, letting the two of you quickly bond over a new school environment earlier in the school year. “I’ll see you later for dinner tonight.”

“Hey, Y/N. I think you should look at this.” The staff member took a pause, looking frightened. “It’s…about Jules.”

“Jules? Is she okay?” You asked with urgency. “Jules as in Seo Jules?”

She nodded and gestured for you to follow her into the fifth-grade wing. Taking a left, the two of you entered the bathroom. Without saying a word, she pointed to the middle stall.

Giving her a look of confusion, she pointed down, making you look. There in the stall, you could see a small girl sitting on the toilet, not using the bathroom, and had her legs stretched in front of her, so her feet wouldn’t be shown on the ground. You could recognize those shoes from anywhere: the light-up tennis shoes that Jin bought for Jules that she loved to brag about.

“What is she doing here?” You whispered. “Are you sure it's Seo Jules?”

Jules was 7 and her classroom was on the other side of the building, opposite the fifth-grade wing. At this time, you knew she should have been in class, learning how to spell words, long words that she didn’t know how even to pronounce.

“Hey Jules? Are you feeling okay?” Your colleague called out.

“Um..Yeah.” You heard Jules's voice come through the stall. “Is school almost over?”

“Yeah, do you want to open the door for me?”

Getting off the toilet seat, Jules unlocked the handle and opened the door. She didn’t expect to see you standing there in front of her. She was wearing an oversized grey hoodie that you’ve never seen her wear and some fake black glasses, way too big for her round small face. Avoiding making any eye contact with you, she looked down. “Are you going to tell Jungkook?”

You looked at your colleague, and she understood that it was her cue to leave the two of you alone to have a private conversation. “Do you want me to?”

“Obviously not,” she mumbled under her breath, still staring down at the ground. “I forgot to do my homework, Miss. I didn’t want to get in trouble in front of everyone.”

“Is there something wrong, Jules?” You asked with concern in your voice. “Is that really the reason why?”

“Yes,” she answered quickly. “Please don’t tell Jungkook this time.”

________

“Seo Jules, please come to the front office,” you announced to the microphone of the PA system.

When it happens a second time, you immediately call Jungkook.

The sounds of ringing phones and tapping keyboards filled the air, but Jungkook’s mind was elsewhere. He was sitting in front of your desk, violently shaking his leg with the look of concern on his face. “Is Jules hurt?”

“Jungkook, Jules was found in the library, hiding by the bookshelves during most of her classes today and she was just found there becaus she hadn’t showed up to soccer practice since she got her brace off.”

“What?” He asked in disbelief.

“Hey,” Jules called out as she stood by the door. “Why are you here?”

Jungkook took a deep breath, trying to keep his cool after hearing Jules ask that question. He didn’t want Jules to ever be scare to tell him the truth, and he didn’t want Jules to ever lie to him about something as important as this. “Do you want to tell me why the school informed me that you were hiding in the library? How you haven’t been attending some certain classes?”

“You told him?” Jules dropped her shoulders, feeling betrayed. “Why would you do that?”

“We need to address the issue going on here,” Jungkook said, his tone disapproving.

“There’s no issue,” Jules protested. “I just got a little lost. It happens sometimes.”

“Jules, you were found around the bean bags, reading books,” He pointed out. “I don’t think you were lost. And this isn’t the first time this has happened and I’m only now being aware of it. What if you were really lost? What if the school couldn’t find you? What if I couldn’t find you?”

“It’s not like that!” Jules sighed, looking down. “You won’t lose me.”

“Sweetheart, we know you haven’t been going to soccer practice either,” you said. Jules’s head shot up to look at you. “If there’s something wrong, you need to tell us now.”

Jules sighed, fidgeting with her fingers. “Everyone says I get special treatment because Jungkook is dating my principal.”

Jungkook’s heart sank along with yours. “What is wrong with that?”

“Nothing.” She paused before continuing. “I don’t know. They just think the teachers favor me over them because of Y/N and how we have money to pay them to like me. They just wouldn’t stop, so I just stopped…I rather be by myself than be with mean people.”

Although the most recent break up with Jungkook didn’t make you cry, the realization that Jules was facing remarks at school due to your relationship with Jungkook did. You remember telling Jungkook from the beginning that you strived to create a safe environment for all students, wanting to shape their growth and education. You never wanted them to feel alone like you did while growing up. Jules felt alone.

You had been aware of the potential challenges that could arise from dating a parent of a student but witnessing the treatment and suffering Jules was facing made you reconsider all your choices.

“It’s not your fault,” Jules reassured quickly, reading the expression on your face. “I love you two. I just..it’s just hard right now. I lost soccer for a bit and now I feel like I have nothing.”

“Sweetheart, you know you always have us and your family,” Jungkook reminded her. “Why didn’t you want to tell me? Or Y/N?”

“Because I don’t want you guys to be sad again. I don’t want Y/N to leave,” Jules answered, tears forming in her eyes.

As a reflex, Jungkook picked up Jules and wrapped his arms around her, making Jules feel like she was safe from everything else in the world.

“You can cry,” Jungkook whispered.

And Jules started bawling. “I just want to be unnoticed so I change my hair and clothes. And try not to come in here.”

“It’s okay.”

“And they keep talking about how young you are! ‘Wow he is too young to be a parent. He don’t know what to do.’” She wept. “Like shut up!”

_________

While Jungkook was putting Jules to bed, you couldn’t help but wrestle with the responsibility you played in Jules’s suffering the last few months by breaking up with Jungkook, leaving her, and now, not knowing she was being bullied at school.

“Hey, what are you thinking about?” Jungkook asked loudly, interrupting your thoughts. “Are you okay?”

“I’m sorry.”

He laughed. “For what?”

“That I did this.”

“Stop.” He sighed, running his hair through his hair. “You supported Jules and countless other students! This is not your fault…Just an unanticipated consequence that can be solved.”

“Are we breaking up again?” You asked seriously, not meeting his eyes. “I never wanted this to happen to a student, let alone Jules.”

“Hey, listen to me.” He nudged at your side with his elbow, making you look at him. “The biggest thing I’ve learned from you is that we cannot control how others react, but how we react. Like you never really yelled at me for not picking up Jules. You were accepting and understanding because you knew there was more to learn.”

You nodded, appreciating Jungkook’s words. “But the last thing I want is for her to suffer.”

Still staring back at you, he reached to grab your hand. “Breaking up isn’t going to solve that, you know?”

“Yeah, but-” Jungkook cuts you off.

“Hey, you believed in me as a parent and as a person even when I was too young and too busy with a career,” Jungkook said, choosing his words carefully. “Our relationship has made me better. It has made Jules so happy since the accident. We were alone without you, struggling. And now with you, we have so much love and support.”

You smiled, squeezing Jungkook’s hand. “You gave me so much as well.”

His grip on your hand tightened. “Do you think I’m still ‘too young’ and ‘too dumb’ to be there for Jules and you?”

“Of course not!”

“Personal matters should not affect the well-being of children under their care, and you helped me realize that as a parent,” he said. “You don’t have to give anything up. You don’t have to give up your dream of maintaining a safe environment for kids, and you don’t have to give up on us. Take the risk.”

You’re reminded of your past conversation with Jungkook, still smiling from all that the two of you have learned and experienced. “I am going to talk to the school community about this.”

“I know you are,” Jungkook said. “I love you. I love Jules and we will get this together, one step and one day at a time.”

And when it was the next day, there was Jungkook, balloons in his right hand, leaning his back against his blue minivan in the parking lot, waiting for his child to come out of elementary school. He was hours early, shocking all the parents and teachers. They all wondered what he was doing.

When it was time for lunch, Jules came into your office, and the both of you looked outside the window and saw Jungkook, talking to himself. “Do you know what he is saying?”

“He isn’t saying anything.” She laughed. “He’s singing our favorite song. I just know it.”

He was right, that everything was a process that took day by day, and he was going to start by not letting Jules wait for him ever again.

_____

the end! thank you for reading <3 (i am terribly sorry for the long wait). 

hopefully one day i can rewrite this story and make it into something way better. so crazy to think i started this years ago. i miss bts and can’t wait for them to come back home <3 the best is yet to come :) 

chapter index; too young

you meet jungkook, a single parent who keeps forgetting to pick up his daughter from school. Jungkook, a busy and somewhat oblivious individual, has to prove he is a good parent as you lend a helping hand to help him navigate the challenges and joyful experiences of parenthood. 

Finding joy together through the shared moments, the both of you must learn what truly matters to you as an individual and as a parent before the chaos within familial relationships and personal insecurities destroys everything you guys had built.

pairing | jeon jungkook x reader

genre |  parent!au, single dad!jungkook angst, fluff short story

wordcount |  21,949 

↳   1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 || 6 || 7 || 8 [completed]

a/n: i will admit that i wrote this when i was super young but i loved writing so excuse my attempts of being funny and cringe. 

chapter index; too young

you meet jungkook, a single parent who keeps forgetting to pick up his daughter from school. Jungkook, a busy and somewhat oblivious individual, has to prove he is a good parent as you lend a helping hand to help him navigate the challenges and joyful experiences of parenthood. 

Finding joy together through the shared moments, the both of you must learn what truly matters to you as an individual and as a parent before the chaos within familial relationships and personal insecurities destroys everything you guys had built.

pairing | jeon jungkook x reader

genre |  parent!au, single dad!jungkook angst, fluff short story

wordcount |  21,949 

↳   1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 || 6 || 7 || 8 [completed]

Keep reading

Slow motion [jjk]

Summary: you only wish to love jungkook for as long as the world allows you to.

>>pairing: idol!jungkook x fem!reader

>>trope: exes to lovers

>>genre: angst,smut,fluff.

>>word count: I'll add later

>>warnings/tags: feelings discussed, arguments, shyreader, Dom!jungkook, sub!reader, unprotected sex, choking kink, backshots, dirty talk,petnames, spit kink, aftercare <3(lmk if I missed anything)

a/n- a recommended song is slow motion by Don toliver ft. Wizkid. Show love through likes, reblogs,comments and asks. Keeps authors very motivated<3 enjoy!! + this is not proofread and a repost.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

"Did anyone see you?" You sigh out as you walk towards the door of your apartment.

Jungkook, by the door undresses as he removes his Nike puffer jacket and ridding himself of his shoes as well ; left in his shirt and sweatpants, he only walks closer to you, grabbing your hand as he leads you to your couch ignoring your question completely.

"I had a long day, skip the questions,___." He groans out as he lays back on your pink velvet sofa,pulling you on his lap.

You simultaneously lay your head on his chest carefully as you hear his heart softly beat in his chest. "I just wanted to know." You mumble.

"It's okay. Did you eat?" He asks, hands rubbing the small of your back as he makes his way to your ass, rubbing at the flesh, clothed by your flowy dress.

You only sigh as you trace the patterns on his tattooed arm, reeling in the silence and the comfort of your ex-boyfriends arms.

It wasn't always so sullen between you two. You always believed that you'd be more happy if you were able to love Jungkook freely without having to sign heaps of papers and worry about publicity.

But that was not the reality of this relationship. Though you did try to get through that phase, it only teared down your relationship. Having to book private dates and seeing each other atleast two times every month. Three if you were lucky.

It was bad enough that your relationship went public, and when it did, it was your worst nightmare having spent two years of your relationship with Jungkook private and signing nda's .

From the Twitter comments and Jungkook having to face the worst times during his lives. You had decided to end things with him after three years of bliss. He took it hard and so did you.

Days turned into Weeks, and weeks turned into months ; that's when Jungkook decided that despite being broken up, he will find every way to meet with you, and kiss you, touch you, tell you he loves you as if you two were still together.

That's what leads you here, on his warm lap, soaking in the little time you had left as the company would be livid if they knew Jungkook left work to go straight to you.

He wonders why you have yet to answer his question, but he doesn't let it bother him. You probably had a long day too.

"Baby, are you hungry yet?" He finally asks. Head leaning down to get a better view of your face.

Feeling wary and skeptical, you look up at him, finally responding to him. "I'm really trying to be nice...but Kook, you should be gone right now. I'm scared you'll get in trouble." You pick at your nails, head hanging low.

He immediately responds. And it is not in a nice tone. "You and this fucking worrying of yours. If I wanted to be gone I would be right now." He scoffs out. Ever so gently removing you off his lap, warm hands ridding themselves of your ass.

"If you want me gone. I'll do just that."

You're quick to scramble to your feet, fluffy socks meeting your wooden floor as you follow him to your door.

"Kook, wait- I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that..but I'm just scared okay? Please understand that." You softly say.

Jungkook turns to look at you, eyes showing the clear emotion of sadness. Your heart clenches at the sight of a sad Jungkook and you reach your hand into his, engulfing in the warmth of his bigger limb.

"You're the reason we never worked out. You know that?" He asks, his hand tightly engulfed in yours.

Your brows furrow as you frown at him, "w-what do you mean,Kook? I broke us up because it was best for you. I did it for you." He chuckles, and it's not jolly or happy.

"You did it for me? Are you fucking crazy? I put my foot in this relationship when everything was going haywire,___. I tried and tried to fight for this. I am sorry that you're too weak to render that in your brain. But I love you. I do love you and I wish you weren't so selfish all the time ; because you know deep down in your heart that you want this. You love me like I love you. So cut the shit and forget the company and the nda's, the fans too. Just focus on you and I. That's all I want."

"Its harder than that." You mumble shyly and Jungkook loses it completely.

"What's fucking hard?! What is huh?!" He growls, "Tell me,___!" He finishes, chest heaving with anger. Completely unfazed that you flinched at his voice raising higher.

It's a stare off now, as you and him stare intensly in each other's eyes.

It's then you decide, that maybe he is right and that you can trust him, hope that everything would be better..if you just shut the world out, that being the company, his fans and the contracts.

Your eyes soften as you walk closer into jungkooks personal space, your arms wrapping around his waist as you hug him, your hair being mushed by his chest.

Jungkook sighs at the sight, eyes looking down at you as he contemplates hugging you back. "Touch me, please." You plee.

"Will you shut me out when we're done hugging?" He chuckles playfully.

You chuckle along with him, chests vibrating against each other, "I won't. Because I love you and I want this to work no matter what, Kook."

"I love you so much." You whisper once more, as you lift your head, frail fingers going up to caress his cheek.

Now on your tippy toes, you lean up for a kiss that Jungkook responds too, as he latches both your lips in a loving kiss. Lips moving in sync, as his hands come to wrap around your waist, fingers fighting the urge to grab the flesh of your ass.

The kiss becomes more feverish than it was softer as you let out moans into Jungkooks mouth and he groans jn response when you tug at his hair, "mhm - fuck, baby." He let's out as he props off your mouth for a second.

You continue to make out by your door while you peel off Jungkooks clothes, from his shirt to his sweats, leaving him naked in front on you since he did not wear underwear, though you don't question it.

"Hold on, baby." His lips leave yours as he tries to remove your dress from off your body and over your head.

Left with your thong, you lean down to pull it off and kick it somewhere in the kitchen.

With so much frustration to let out, Jungkook wastes no time lifting you up as you curl your legs around his waist, leading you both to your bedroom.

It's everything jungkook has seen before. From the Polaroids of you with family and friends hanging on the wall and the pastel pink wallpaper on your walls.

"Get on the bed, your back facing me and arch your back." The tone is instructive more than it is demanding and it radiates pleasure onto you, making you unbelievably wet for him. So you do comply and do just as he says.

Foreplay has never been one for yours and Jungkooks sex life, As much as Jungkook loves getting his dick sucked and you loving the pleasure from getting eaten out, you both just love to feel each other and be binded as one with no time to waste.

He wants to feel you squeeze around him and he wants to fill you up so good. Maybe after that would he eat you out and same with sucking him off.

Now he lines up with your hole, slowly inserting thr tip of his hard cock, precum leaking.

You both audibly moan in sync when he fully enters, slow and teasing thrusts at first.

You whine pitifully as you shake your ass as to pry Jungkook to move faster."Jungkook please."

"I know,baby, I know." He teases with a sly smirk that you can't really see from behind.

He complies with you, moving faster as the squelching sounds of your wetness and his pre cum fill the room.

Along with your moans and jungkooks low but raspy moans that have you curling your toes, you become a leaking faucet, getting tighter around his cock.

"Mm- fuck! You're so tight, baby." Jungkook moans, "keep squeezing my cock, baby."

It's a sloppy mess now as your moans sound like cries now, high pitched, whiny much and loud. Very loud.

Your poor neighbors :(

You squeeze tighter around him when he slaps your ass quite a few times, groping at the flesh when he let's go. Jungkook quietly groans at the tight fit. "Wan' me to squeeze you just like that?" You coyly remind him.

"Hmh, just like that, baby." He replies, a breath of relief is what it sounds like.

You feel your high approaching when your stomach coils tighter and tighter and tears pool at your eyes, one leaking from your left eye and onto your cheek.

What a sight.

Jungkook pulls you with your hair and onto his chest, his thrusts sloppier at this new angle.

"So pretty." He presses a kiss onto your cheek. He forces your mouth open with his free hand that isn't gripping your right ass cheek, leaning forward to spit a glob of saliva into your mouth.

"You gonna be a good girl and swallow? Hmm?"

You only swallow in response, feeling the warm spit go down your throat. You like it, quite tasty to you, everything about him is tasty.

"Fuck- I-im cumming, Kook!" You exclaim, feeling your knees go weak.

"That's it, baby. Soak my dick."

And on cue, you cum undone on his cock, jungkook moaning along with you as he spills into your hole.

The sticky white substance, thick and messy in your tiny hole.

You fall limply onto the bed when Jungkook let's go of your hair, and he gets up to get a warm cloth to clean you up.

"You Okay, baby?" He questions when he's done wiping you clean and covering you up.

You lazily nod at him, smile playing on your lips. "You did not say you loved me back, earlier on."You playfully tease.

Jungkook chuckles in response, running his hands through his hair for the first time today.

"Wellll," He drags, "you didn't exactly give me that chance since you kissed me crazy."

"I'm giving you a chance now. And come lay with me!" You whine.

"Okayyy, fine woman! I love you so so much." He hops in the bed beside you, pulling you close to his chest immediately. Desperate to feel you on him. "That's what I like to hear." You kiss his chest and he kisses your head above you too.

"I love you,too."

i had such a big rush of different emotions as i was reading this omg. this is so good. this au was something so different and intriguing, im desperate for more

little lady | jjk

{ purge!jungkook | angst, fluff(?) | 7k | masterlist }

↝ summary: in an attempt to help her sickly father’s condition, (Y/N) decides to take part in the annual purge. When events go astray, her tattooed ex-boyfriend seems to be more than willing to help. 

↝ tw: gore, violence, guns/knives, death, murder, a steamy kiss, swearing

↝ a/n: this is heavily based on the new purge film. My knowledge on the purge isn’t too great I’ve only watched that one so there is possible errors. Also, @moon-baby95 is an angel for helping me look over this and giving her lovely comments as she does so. May ‘THE TATTOOED BOY BITCH YES’ always prosper. 

Keep reading

this had me feeling some type of way. I loved this so much. this might possibly just be my favorite fic of all time. it had me so soft. and the sensuality of the smut scenes was perfect. this fic is literal perfection.

Shield || jjk

⇢ pairing: security guard!jungkook x bartender!reader ⇢ genre: fluff, romance, smut ⇢ word count: 18.6k ⇢ warnings: unprotected sex, oral sex, rough sex, lots of dirty talk it’s pretty filthy, a brief scene of harassment (it’s not graphic, no touching involved), spanking, hair pulling, jungkook has a big dick, jungkook is the cutest shyest boy to ever exist, reader and jk blush A LOT, jk in a leather jacket that’s about it ⇢ summary: An unfortunate, messy situation involving a drunk asshole not taking no for an answer prompts your boss to hire a new security guard to stay near, just for safe-keeping. When all you were expecting was a guy in his late thirties who couldn’t bother to smile, much less be friendly, you’re pleasantly surprised by the cute, rather shy guy whose job is to keep his eyes on you and protect you for five nights a week.

A/N: I am SOSOSOSO happy with this fic. I had so much fun writing it. This was written in a couple of days where I just sat for straight HOURS writing like,,,,5k words a sitting. I love this with my whole heart and I hope y’all do too. Please, let me know what you think, feedback is, as always, very much appreciated!

Banner was made by the wonderful angel @mikrokosm​ thank you sm baby!!! this looks so much better than the trashy one i made asjsksj

tag list: @sscarletrrose @giadalin @out-of-jams @kookoo-kachoo @teresaisla @wickizer @fakeleaves @el-mc @smol1 @luisafuchs @athenakyle @claude-y 

Keep reading

Private Property

(here is the song i was inspired from )

Fem reader x individual bts members

Warning: 18+ (Degration, recording, food play, fingering, vaginal sex,) lmk if i missed anything !!

a/n: hi its me, okay so this is my first time writing smut so dont hate me, and yeah thank you sm for reading this stuff :) I also take requests and yeah <3

Namjoon:

I'll go whenever you press play

Pause whenever you want babe

Do whatever you want babe

I'll sing whatever you want babe

Make love whenever you want to

Do whatever we gone do

No ones here but us two

Me and you

Namjoon had you pressed against the bathroom,¨Why do you make me like this y/n¨He groaned in your ear, shivers running up and down your spine. His attack continued on your neck, harshly kissing it eager to take you all in,¨Why couldn't we wait until we got home? Instead were in Tae´s bathroom¨ He continued

His hand trailed down your pants, feeling you,¨Please Joon¨ You moaned, throwing your head back when his thumb began to rub your clit. Your hand Instinctly went to his, trying to relieve some pleasure from your sensitive clit but instead he took your small hands with his big one and pinned them against the wall. You let out small whimpers trying not to alert anyone outside.

One of his hands rubbed circles around your clit, another hand on the wall holding your hands and his mouth on your neck trailing to your ear,¨It's just you and me y/n, no one else¨He whispered in your ear, your eyes rolling back from all the pleasure,¨Just like that baby¨ He smirked, seeing you dissolve with just his fingers, your puppy eyes doing things to him,¨I got you¨

Yoongi:

'Cause she hops on top with no top

Riding the drop

Meaning she drive stick and she gives good

Now I don't know if that ring finger gon get a rock

But I tear that thang up and call the doc real talk

Yoongi's hands were on your breasts while your hips smacked down on his. His cock buried deeply in your cunt. Your moans and his pants filling the car,¨You feel so good¨ Yoongi moaned out, his fingers pulling your nipples slightly, this sudden pleasure made your hips slow down the rhythm,¨Continue¨ Yoongi chuckled, lightly slapping your ass.

You shook your head,¨I can't, it feels too good¨ You whimpered

Suddenly Yoongi wrapped his hands around your waist tightly gripping it, he brought his legs up and planted them on the couch seat, the new position making his cock reach a new place that had you shiver, Yoongi looked up at you and smiled, you were about to smile when he suddenly thirst his hips up at a rapid past making you scream,¨Oh god¨

Your hands went to reach his shoulder while he fucked you hard and fast,¨Thats my girl¨ He smriked at the way you disolved on his cock, your mind going fuzzy from the pleasure.

Hobi:

Mm don't stop until you finish

So bad feels like I'm sinning

So God please forgive me

For what I'm 'bout to do

Treat me like your object

Please baby don't stop it

You say no, I say yes

The best I ever had

Hobi´s hand went to reach for your neck, his cock drilling your cunt at a fast pace. Your legs were wrapped around his waist while your hands gripped the bed sheets,``Your my slut¨Hobi groaned out, biting your earlobe lightly. You were too into the feeling of his cock inside your wet cunt you didn't answer until a smack to your thigh brought you back,¨Answer¨ He grunted, his grip going a little tight.

You nodded desperately,¨Yes I´m yours¨ He smiled at your answer, his hips slapping against yours,¨Harder please¨

Hobi furrowed his brows,¨No-¨

¨Please I need it¨ You whimpered desperately.

Hobi sat up on his knees to have more control of his movements and pulled you closer to him. The back of your thighs hitting the front of his, you insticly wrapped your legs around you as he began to rock his hips even faster,¨You like that right?¨ He laughed at your reaction, the new position hitting a new area,his hand went back to your neck gripping a little tighter,¨Mine¨ He groaned, smacking his hips against you.

Jin:

And I've been waiting for my minute girl

I'm going straight to dessert no dinner girl

And in the couple hours I ain't even finish girl

And Imma keep the property as long as you let me hit it girl

Bet they don't know that you a sinner girl

You couldn't see anything or move your hands, you had to trust your boyfriend who decided to tie you up and blindfold you. You felt the bed sink slightly indicating your boyfriend was back. He seemed to be shaking something,¨Bring your legs up baby¨ He instructed.

You listened, opening your legs for him, he moved in between your legs. His lips hovering over your inner thighs, your breathing getting heavier. That's when you felt something slightly cold meeting your wet cunt, the can of the substance made it slip down to onto the sheets, once your nose had a whiff you realized it was whipped cream, Jin´s puffy lips going to attack your clit slurping up the whipped cream,¨Oh my god¨ You moaned out

Jin's tongue slid between your sweet folds, up to your clit sucking on the nub,¨You taste so good baby. He moaned into you, you cried out in pleasure as his tongue continued to clean you up. He added two fingers to your cunt while his lips sucked your clit harder,¨My favorite dessert¨ He whispered.

Jimin:

Keep my property private

Between me and you, they ain't gotta know what we do

Keep my property private

Don't want them all up in my business, affecting my business

Keep my property private

¨I need you now Jimin¨ You shutted the door to his hotel room.

Next thing you knew you were pressed up against a wall while Jimin slid down to his knees for you,¨Imagine if your fans knew how dirty you were y/n¨He smirked up at you. Your hand went to your breast, throwing your head back at his dirty words,¨Look at me when I'm talking to you¨ He slapped your cunt, your clit vibrating in pleasure.

¨No Jimin, please do something¨ You cried out

He nodded,¨Of course my dirty girl¨ He grabbed your leg and brought it up to his shoulder, your cunt directly on his face now, he lightly blew air on your clit. You bit your lip hard,¨Don't be shy¨ He teased. His tongue diving into your folds, your hands went down to his hair, slightly pulling on it.

The tugging turned him on, he began to moan into your cunt, adding vibrations to everything, the pleasure becoming overwhelming,¨You can do it baby¨ He smiled when he heard all your whimpering.

Tae:

Your heart driving me safe, wanna feel safe

But keep my property private

Gotta maintain that squeaky clean image

While I'm riding around and I'm getting it

You were sitting on the´slap, your body facing the camera in front of you. Tae began to move your hair to the side to have more access when kissing your neck,üWhat if everyone knew your dirty secret y/n?¨ He asked, his mouth sucking your sensitive part of your neck, you let out quiet moans,¨that the perfect goody two shoes is in here with me?¨

His hand began to travel under your shirt and gripped your bra,¨Tae¨ You moaned, throwing your head back on his shoulder, giving him more access to do anything he wanted to you.

He smirked as he continued his attack on your neck,¨Don't worry baby, it's just you and me¨ His hand pulling your bra up to have more access to your breast, his fingers rolling your nipple. You began to moan.

Tae continued this teasing for a bit longer and you began to grow unpaicent,¨Tae please just fuck me¨ You gasped out

He chuckled,¨Of course baby¨

Jungkook:

The boy got so much dirt on me

I swear if he was the sex police

They could lock a bitch up for the century

This boy got so much dirt on me

I swear if he told a soul, where could I go?

¨Are you serious?¨ You rolled your eyes when you saw Jungkook, you went to turn around but he pulled you to a lonely corner of the party,¨Let me go!¨ You raised your voice but in reality you wanted him to fuck you hard.

Jungkook gripped your wrist with his hand and pinned them above your head, his knee forcing itself between your legs,¨Why haven't you called?¨ He asked, his lips hovering over your ear

¨I've been busy¨ You lied

He began to raise his knee a bit to your wet cunt,¨I know you need me y/n¨ He whispered in your ear,¨or did you forget everything we've done?¨ He asked

His cold hand went down your pants to rub circles on your clit, your mind losing itself,¨Kook… please¨ You whimpered, and a little afraid of being caught.

His body pressed against you, hiding a bit of what was going on, the closeness making his hand go harder on your clit, you threw your head back in pleasure,¨I've missed you¨ He threw puppy eyes down at you, those eyes making you melt,¨I need you¨ His fingers slipping in you as his thumb continued to rub fast circles on your clit.

¨God i've missed you too¨ You moaned out in pleasure, not caring about anything anymore.

diet pepsi | jjk

summary. stuck in the rain, jungkook can’t resist the sweetness of your lollipop—or the taste of your lips.

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre: established relationship au (kind of?), suggestive

word count: 1.4k

content/warnings: oc's a tease & a menace / jk loves it / allusions to car s^x / kissing / making out

notes: inspired by this ask. ik i’ve only written for yoongi on here until now, but i thought that jk fit the request better. as always, asks, reblogs, likes, comments and feedback are so so appreciated! not my best work but i hope you enjoy my loves <3333

main masterlist

────

The rain had been falling for hours now, in waves so steady it felt like the whole world had dissolved into a haze of mist and water. Jungkook’s car was the only thing cutting through the fog, its headlights barely illuminating the slick pavement ahead.

The city lights blur in the distance, their neon colours muted by the downpour. Inside, it was warm, quiet, with only the soft hum of the engine and the patter of rain against the windows.

You sit in the passenger seat, the candy on your tongue melting into a slow, sugary sweetness. A lollipop, something you had absentmindedly grabbed from the convenience store before you hit the road. Now, you twirl it between your fingers, occasionally taking it back into your mouth, tasting the sweet tang as you watch the rain race down the window.

Jungkook, next to you, is focused on the road. His grip on the steering wheel is relaxed, the ink across the back of his hand disappearing into the shadows cast across his skin every so often.

His eyes flicker in your direction, catching the movement of the lollipop between your lips. Though the movement is subtle, you don't miss the way his jaw tenses, or how he shifts in his seat ever so slightly. His expression is cool, his face unreadable, but a small smirk teases a corner of your lips.

The soft glow from the dashboard casts shadows across his features, highlighting the sharp line of his jaw, the slope of his nose, and the way his tongue darts out to wet his lips.

“Can I have a taste?” His voice is smooth, cutting through the low hum of the engine, playful but low enough to send a shiver down your spine.

You glance over at him, brows raised slightly in surprise by the sudden request. You slide the lollipop out from between your lips, holding it out in front of him with a teasing tilt of your head.

His eyes flicker from the road to the candy, then back to you. “That’s not what I meant.”

Your pulse quickens at the subtle undertone in his voice. The suggestiveness lacing his words isn't lost on you, and something about the way the rain made everything outside feel distant and forgotten made the air inside the car feel thick, heavy with an unspoken tension. You plop the lollipop back in your mouth, swirling it around in a deliberately slow manner, before pulling it out again, this time letting your teeth drag lightly across it.

“Oh?” you murmur, turning your body toward him, leaning a little closer. “What did you mean, then?”

Jungkook shoots you a sidelong glance, his lips curving into a small, almost dangerous smile. He doesn’t answer right away, letting the question hang in the air between you, like the lingering fog outside the car. His fingers flexes against the steering wheel, and you watch the way his knuckles whiten as his grip tightens.

Outside, the rain begins to fall harder, each drop splashing against the windshield like tiny explosions. The wipers move faster, thundering from one side to the other, but it only made the scene beyond the glass more distorted, more dreamlike. The city lights turn into glowing streaks, the world outside reduced to a blur of motion and colour.

Inside, it feels as though time has slowed.

“You’re gonna make me crash if you keep that up,” he mutters, his voice thick with something deeper, rougher.

“Am I distracting you, Kook?” you asked, your voice light, but the challenge in it was unmistakable. You blink at him innocently, failing to hide the cocky smile that draws across your lips.

His hand tightens on the wheel for just a second, and you know you have him. His eyes are still locked on the road, but there's something in the way his breath quickens, the way his body shifts, that tells you he's paying more attention to you than he is to the endless stretch of highway in front of him.

Without saying anything, you lean back into your seat, drawing the lollipop slowly into your mouth again, the sticky sweetness spreading across your tongue. You can feel his eyes on you, a quick glance, before they flick back to the road. The air between you crackle with a tension that feels like it might snap at any moment, and you revel in it.

Minutes pass, the rain a constant backdrop, the car a world of its own. Every now and then, Jungkook would exhale sharply, and you’d catch him watching the way your lips moved around the lollipop, the way your mouth worked the candy with deliberate, languid motions. It's a game, one you know you're playing well, and you can feel him slipping.

And then, just as you're about to push him a little further, Jungkook’s hand moves from the steering wheel. He reaches over, his fingers brushing against your thigh, light at first, but firm enough that it sent a jolt of heat through you. His touch is warm, steady, and he gives your leg a gentle squeeze.

“I’m pulling over,” he says, his voice deeper, rougher now, no longer trying to hide the want simmering underneath.

Your heart skips a beat, a thrill running through you as you watch him steer the car toward the side of the road. The rain hasn’t let up, pouring harder now, but it doesn’t seem to matter. The world outside has already disappeared, fading into nothing more than a wet blur, leaving just the two of you.

Jungkook shifts the car into park, the engine still running, headlights casting faint beams through the thick curtain of rain. He leans back in his seat, exhaling slowly, before turning his head to look at you, his gaze dark, heavy with intention.

“You’re trouble, you know that?” he says, his hand still resting on your thigh, his fingers now tracing lazy circles over your skin.

You smile, a small, knowing smile. “You know you love it.”

He doesn't deny your words, and simply watches you for a long moment, as if weighing what to do next. Then, slowly, his hand slides higher, his fingers brushing the hem of your denim skirt, teasing the skin beneath. The warmth of his touch sends a wave of heat coursing through your body, and suddenly the air inside the car feels too thick, too charged.

Jungkook moves his hand up from your thigh to cup your cheek, and you pull the lollipop out of your mouth just before he presses his lips to yours.

His touch is soft at first, the pressure he puts into the kiss feather light. When he pulls back, your eyes remain shut for a few more seconds. He moves his thumb across the apple of your cheek and your eyes flutter open.

In an instant, his lips return to yours with such force that you freeze for a second. He kisses you roughly, refusing to part from you as if you might cease to exist if he does. His mouth is sweet, his breath tinged with hints of mint, and a small sound escapes your throat when he grazes your bottom lip with his teeth.

Goosebumps rise across your skin as his kisses move along the curve of your jaw, his electric touch leaving you breathless.

You pull apart from him only when you're forced to catch your breath, your chest rising and falling rapidly. His eyes dart across your parted lips.

He doesn’t give you much time to recover, his hands slipping back to your waist, pulling you closer again as if he can't stand the distance between you. His kisses trail down your neck, slow and deliberate, each one more intense than the last. His lips graze over the sensitive skin just below your ear, and you can’t help the soft moan that escapes your lips.

He pauses for a second as you stare at him with eyes clouded with desire.

"Fuck," he groans. "Get in the back seat, baby."

diet pepsi | jjk

summary. stuck in the rain, jungkook can’t resist the sweetness of your lollipop—or the taste of your lips.

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre: established relationship au (kind of?), suggestive

word count: 1.4k

content/warnings: oc's a tease & a menace / jk loves it / allusions to car s^x / kissing / making out

notes: inspired by this ask. ik i’ve only written for yoongi on here until now, but i thought that jk fit the request better. as always, asks, reblogs, likes, comments and feedback are so so appreciated! not my best work but i hope you enjoy my loves <3333

main masterlist

────

The rain had been falling for hours now, in waves so steady it felt like the whole world had dissolved into a haze of mist and water. Jungkook’s car was the only thing cutting through the fog, its headlights barely illuminating the slick pavement ahead.

The city lights blur in the distance, their neon colours muted by the downpour. Inside, it was warm, quiet, with only the soft hum of the engine and the patter of rain against the windows.

You sit in the passenger seat, the candy on your tongue melting into a slow, sugary sweetness. A lollipop, something you had absentmindedly grabbed from the convenience store before you hit the road. Now, you twirl it between your fingers, occasionally taking it back into your mouth, tasting the sweet tang as you watch the rain race down the window.

Jungkook, next to you, is focused on the road. His grip on the steering wheel is relaxed, the ink across the back of his hand disappearing into the shadows cast across his skin every so often.

His eyes flicker in your direction, catching the movement of the lollipop between your lips. Though the movement is subtle, you don't miss the way his jaw tenses, or how he shifts in his seat ever so slightly. His expression is cool, his face unreadable, but a small smirk teases a corner of your lips.

The soft glow from the dashboard casts shadows across his features, highlighting the sharp line of his jaw, the slope of his nose, and the way his tongue darts out to wet his lips.

“Can I have a taste?” His voice is smooth, cutting through the low hum of the engine, playful but low enough to send a shiver down your spine.

You glance over at him, brows raised slightly in surprise by the sudden request. You slide the lollipop out from between your lips, holding it out in front of him with a teasing tilt of your head.

His eyes flicker from the road to the candy, then back to you. “That’s not what I meant.”

Your pulse quickens at the subtle undertone in his voice. The suggestiveness lacing his words isn't lost on you, and something about the way the rain made everything outside feel distant and forgotten made the air inside the car feel thick, heavy with an unspoken tension. You plop the lollipop back in your mouth, swirling it around in a deliberately slow manner, before pulling it out again, this time letting your teeth drag lightly across it.

“Oh?” you murmur, turning your body toward him, leaning a little closer. “What did you mean, then?”

Jungkook shoots you a sidelong glance, his lips curving into a small, almost dangerous smile. He doesn’t answer right away, letting the question hang in the air between you, like the lingering fog outside the car. His fingers flexes against the steering wheel, and you watch the way his knuckles whiten as his grip tightens.

Outside, the rain begins to fall harder, each drop splashing against the windshield like tiny explosions. The wipers move faster, thundering from one side to the other, but it only made the scene beyond the glass more distorted, more dreamlike. The city lights turn into glowing streaks, the world outside reduced to a blur of motion and colour.

Inside, it feels as though time has slowed.

“You’re gonna make me crash if you keep that up,” he mutters, his voice thick with something deeper, rougher.

“Am I distracting you, Kook?” you asked, your voice light, but the challenge in it was unmistakable. You blink at him innocently, failing to hide the cocky smile that draws across your lips.

His hand tightens on the wheel for just a second, and you know you have him. His eyes are still locked on the road, but there's something in the way his breath quickens, the way his body shifts, that tells you he's paying more attention to you than he is to the endless stretch of highway in front of him.

Without saying anything, you lean back into your seat, drawing the lollipop slowly into your mouth again, the sticky sweetness spreading across your tongue. You can feel his eyes on you, a quick glance, before they flick back to the road. The air between you crackle with a tension that feels like it might snap at any moment, and you revel in it.

Minutes pass, the rain a constant backdrop, the car a world of its own. Every now and then, Jungkook would exhale sharply, and you’d catch him watching the way your lips moved around the lollipop, the way your mouth worked the candy with deliberate, languid motions. It's a game, one you know you're playing well, and you can feel him slipping.

And then, just as you're about to push him a little further, Jungkook’s hand moves from the steering wheel. He reaches over, his fingers brushing against your thigh, light at first, but firm enough that it sent a jolt of heat through you. His touch is warm, steady, and he gives your leg a gentle squeeze.

“I’m pulling over,” he says, his voice deeper, rougher now, no longer trying to hide the want simmering underneath.

Your heart skips a beat, a thrill running through you as you watch him steer the car toward the side of the road. The rain hasn’t let up, pouring harder now, but it doesn’t seem to matter. The world outside has already disappeared, fading into nothing more than a wet blur, leaving just the two of you.

Jungkook shifts the car into park, the engine still running, headlights casting faint beams through the thick curtain of rain. He leans back in his seat, exhaling slowly, before turning his head to look at you, his gaze dark, heavy with intention.

“You’re trouble, you know that?” he says, his hand still resting on your thigh, his fingers now tracing lazy circles over your skin.

You smile, a small, knowing smile. “You know you love it.”

He doesn't deny your words, and simply watches you for a long moment, as if weighing what to do next. Then, slowly, his hand slides higher, his fingers brushing the hem of your denim skirt, teasing the skin beneath. The warmth of his touch sends a wave of heat coursing through your body, and suddenly the air inside the car feels too thick, too charged.

Jungkook moves his hand up from your thigh to cup your cheek, and you pull the lollipop out of your mouth just before he presses his lips to yours.

His touch is soft at first, the pressure he puts into the kiss feather light. When he pulls back, your eyes remain shut for a few more seconds. He moves his thumb across the apple of your cheek and your eyes flutter open.

In an instant, his lips return to yours with such force that you freeze for a second. He kisses you roughly, refusing to part from you as if you might cease to exist if he does. His mouth is sweet, his breath tinged with hints of mint, and a small sound escapes your throat when he grazes your bottom lip with his teeth.

Goosebumps rise across your skin as his kisses move along the curve of your jaw, his electric touch leaving you breathless.

You pull apart from him only when you're forced to catch your breath, your chest rising and falling rapidly. His eyes dart across your parted lips.

He doesn’t give you much time to recover, his hands slipping back to your waist, pulling you closer again as if he can't stand the distance between you. His kisses trail down your neck, slow and deliberate, each one more intense than the last. His lips graze over the sensitive skin just below your ear, and you can’t help the soft moan that escapes your lips.

He pauses for a second as you stare at him with eyes clouded with desire.

"Fuck," he groans. "Get in the back seat, baby."

frostbite | jjk (soon)

❄ pairing: alien!jungkook x human!reader

❄ summary: your graduation relies on the current thesis that you’re doing, studying the environment in the upper part of your province where it has strangely gotten colder over the past 200 years even with Earth warming up. is it a normal anomaly or is it because of a certain someone who you accidentally disturbed when you first met?

❄ rating: 18+

❄ genre/au: smut, angst, fluff, sci-fi/alien, strangers to lovers, possible roommates

❄ publishing date : TBA

❄ warnings/content : explicit sexual content, temperature play (jk has some frost abilities), body worship (OC loves koobies sm 🥺), near death experience, OC is stubborn but JK’s calm, patient & sweet. this fic will mainly talk about environmental issues (ie. global warming, etc.), more to be added

a/n: i just wanna post this before i forget about this fic 💀. title and this phenomenal banner by my naia boo @opaljm​ (ily lol). much love & appreciation for @ilikemesometaetaes​ & @aquagustd​ for being there while i was brainstorming this at 4AM after staring at JK’s GQ’s pic, also i didn’t expect that my minor degree will be relevant for this LMAO

taglist: either comment, send an ask or fill up the form!

Keep reading

distance | drabble

a/n: im starting to write fics again so this is a practice drabble i wrote to test the y/n waters. ive never posted on tumblr before and this is all just for fun!! enjoy :)

— pairing: jungkook x (f) reader

— genre: friends to lovers, college au, angst

— snippet: as much as you hated the way he only ever seemed to contact you when he wanted something, the sentimental part of you was willingly to keep any piece - no matter how small - of friendship you two had left.

-----

“you know,” he started, glancing up at you before his gaze flickered back to the numbers on his calculator and the equations on his sheet, “you’re not very good at this.”

you tapped the eraser of your pencil against your lips, eyes squinting in an attempt to decipher the numerous symbols and digits that bombarded your computer screen. “well, you know math has never been my forté.”

he sighs, dropping his pencil onto the paper and leaning forward to push down the top of your laptop so that it hovered right above the keyboard, “very funny," he let out dryly, "but c’mon, that’s not what i’m talking about.”

you let out a groan before pushing your laptop back up to its 90 degree angle. “not to sound mean, but for the hundredth and possibly the thousandth time, i do not give a shit about your love life, jeon.” slightly offended and taken back by your bluntness, he opens his mouth to speak, but you beat him to it, “don’t you have any other friends to annoy? male friends, perhaps? i’m sure they'll know more about your situation than i do."

he rolls his eyes, leaning forward to once again push your laptop down, this time closing it completely. “but you actually know her.”

“fine. want my advice? how about just grow a pair and talk to her like a normal person. you don’t need me as your ‘middle man’.” letting the ice in your words dissipate into thin air, you tap the screen of your phone to see that it’s already 5:30pm. you have plans to attend to.

he watches as you pack away your things, patiently waiting for you to meet his gaze. as your eyes finally lock, a small, playful smile appears on his lips, “but i always need you.”

fighting the urge to roll your eyes, you let out a breath from your nose, “that’s great jeongguk. but what i need, is to leave.” you sling your backpack over your shoulders and start your exit out the building. a small part of you expects him to ask why you’re in such a hurry, but even if he was at all curious, he didn’t make it known.

before you can completely walk past him, he grabs at your wrist, pulling you back slightly. “i'm sorry for being annoying. you’re not mad at me are you?” for the nth time that night, your tired eyes meet his eager ones and you can’t help but feel bad. as much as you hated the way he only ever seemed to contact you when he wanted something, the sentimental part of you was willingly to keep any piece - no matter how small - of friendship you two had left.

swallowing your pride, you open your mouth to speak. “she gets off work at 7 and probably hasn’t eaten anything all day. she loves the spinach feta wrap from starbucks, and i’m sure she’d really appreciate one of those cake pop things too.” he flashes you a toothy grin, and before he can exclaim his gratitude you remove his hand from your wrist and readjust the straps of your weighty backpack. “i’ll see you around.”

watching you escape the confines of the quiet library, he can’t help but feel his heart twinge when he realizes that in the entire three hours you two had spent together, you did not smile at him once.

waiting game | drabble

a/n: dedicated to the app i hate the most.

— pairing: jungkook x (f) reader

— genre: friends/strangers to lovers (?), college au, fun banter

— snippet: either im rlly ugly or i just killed you with my good looks

warnings: idk if this will make sense if you don’t have much knowledge on “snapchat culture”. also tons of dialogue in this one for no reason other than im lazy :D

--------------

“okay, how about this one?”

tilting the phone to face your friend, she spares a brief glance at the image plastered on the screen before looking you dead in the eye, “is that not the same selfie you took just two seconds ago?”

“are you implying that i’m ugly?”

“i’m implying that you’re an idiot.” she reaches over, pressing the home button on your device to sneak a peak at the time written in small, white font. “you opened his snap at 11:43pm. it’s 11:46 now.”

swatting her hand away from your phone, you quickly reopen snapchat and tap the ‘x’ at the top left corner to discard the photo you spent a little too much time taking. “god, three whole ass minutes, now it just looks like i’m trying too hard.”

“but that’s exactly what you were d-”

“shut up. i’ll just send him a picture of, like, the ceiling or something, he probably doesn’t even think i’m pretty anyw-”

“holy shit you’re annoying.” in the blink of an eye, rose snatches the phone from your hand, extends her arm out to an upward angle, and takes a semi-blurry picture of the both of you, “done.” your eyes go wide as you see the small box turn to a red arrow: delivered, now.

“i think you just made my heart fall out of my ass.”

“and i think that you’re overthinking this too much. he’s one of the hottest guys on campus, probably - actually no - i know he has tons of girls lined up on his phone. do you really want to be another one he just checks off the list?”

her words float around inside your head as you stare mindlessly at the screen in front of you, eagerly awaiting his reply. “it’s kinda fun though,” you try to reason.

rose lets out a soft chuckle and pokes you in your cheek, “you’re so cute. i know this whole ‘talking stage’ and ‘flirting’ thing is new for you, so i’ll let it slide.”

you feel guilty all of a sudden when you realize that you’ve only been talking about him since the moment she got to your dorm. understanding how annoying it can be to constantly pester someone with your relationship problems, you turn off your phone and throw it to the opposite side of the bed. “by the way, how’s your internship going?”

she smiles in appreciation, picking up the m&m packet from your bedside table and tearing it open. “the real question is how is it not going.” once she’s placed all the yellow-colored chocolates into the palm of your hand, she doesn't fail to let you in on every single detail for the next half an hour.

“...i mean besides all that, the pay is insanely good, so i’m not really complaining. and also, i’m pretty sure he snapped you back, like, 15 minutes ago.” she grabs your phone from the edge of the bed and tosses it in your lap, amused by how fast your eyes light up.

staring nervously at the name on the top of your chat feed, you swear you can feel your heart beating faster and louder as the seconds go by.

jungkook

∎ new snap, 17m

without much thought, you open the picture and - woah. grabbing the closest pillow to you, you scream into it as if that’ll stop the butterflies in your stomach.

confused by the reaction, rose mutters a “let me see that” and grabs the phone from your hand. mouth slightly agape, she playfully pushes your shoulder, not taking her eyes off the image. “i get it, ____. i really get it now.”

lifting your head from the pillow, you take another glance at the photo and let out one final scream into the soft cushion before taking the phone back from rose’s hand. “was he sculpted by the gods or something? how does anyone have a body like that?” you can’t help but gawk at the oh-so precious photo that jeon jungkook himself has chosen to bless your eyes with.

shirtless torso, grey sweats, and wet hair: what would normally be considered a harmless mirror selfie is quite literally turning into what you assume will be the cause of your death. “i think he’s trying to kill me.”

“well hurry up and reply before he thinks you actually died from his hot, hot, hot body.”

when you finally let go of the picture, you notice that there’s no longer an empty red square, but a blue one that fills its place. “fuck, he typed something in the chat.” rose scoots herself closer to you, your shoulders touching as she watches you carefully slide open the conversation - not fully - but just enough so that you can see what he says without notifying him that you opened his message.

your cheeks turn an intense shade of pink, and all rose can do is laugh. “i have to say i am kind of jealous of you right now... babe.”

jungkook

wow 5 mins on opened

either im rlly ugly or i just killed you with my good looks

jk

but seriously babe wya

you

babe?

and sorry lmao i just forgot to reply thats all

jungkook

rightttttttttt

it’s okay to say u were staring

i wont tell anyone

and what do u want me to call u

pretty girl

angel face

a pause in the chat like he's thinking for more things to say. jungkook is typing...

love

love. you mentally facepalm yourself for letting your heart flutter at the possibility of him - or even anyone for that matter - calling you that one day.

you

maybe uhhhh idk. my name :D

and awh did me leaving you on open bruise ur ego :((((((

jungkook

fiesty

i like that

but fr it kinda did

while it was fun to push each other’s buttons, you were slightly unsure of how to gage the seriousness of his last reply. why do i kind of feel bad, you thought to yourself.

you

i didn’t think you cared lol

jungkook

ahhh

but you see love

i do when it comes to you :)

i'm a fire bender! || JJK

scenario. (NOT STORY :3)

synopsis: jungkook freaks out when you pretend not to know ATLA (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

warnings: swearing

a/n: i wanted to make this tagalog, but i use balbal tagalog so it would be very difficult to translate 🥹

------------------------

@haecien

Give me possessive koo smut 😇

pairing: dom!jk x fem!reader

genre: smut, drabble, request, unedited

word count: 2k

warnings: smut, drinking, lots of swearing, oral 4f, overstimulation, mocking, couch sëx, rough missionary, unsafe sëx, degradation, biting, slapping, squirting, bruising, hair pulling, dom!jk, sub!reader, a little toxicity, idk Sunday fun day ig

note: hope it’s to your liking♡ -dubu

“Unlock your phone.” Jungkook’s eyes pour into yours as he waits for your compliance.

“What?” you question, aggravated by his unnecessary interest in your coworkers.

“Open it, Y/N.” he insists, leaning back onto the sofa cushion, pressing the cold rectangle into your palm.

“Babe, seriously?” you whine, searching his eyes for a hint of playfulness, finding nothing but an ocean of severity.

You were having a conversation about work, letting your boyfriend know of your upcoming schedule and activities. You accidentally let the name of your project partner slip through your wine-coated lips.

Jungkook’s ears perked up at the ring of a masculine sounding name. You stare at him in defeat, taking the phone from his hand with a pitiful sigh.

“I haven’t even texted him yet, for Christ sakes Jungkook!” you say exasperated.

“Yet.” he replied matter-of-factually.

“It’s not like I chose to work with him, Koo.” you exclaimed dramatically, unlocking your phone and going to his saved contact.

You felt this antagonizing creature clawing at your tender insides for momentary satisfaction. Why did you let the wine talk before your instincts? Jungkook isn’t exactly the kindest when it comes to other men around you.

He wasn’t controlling, but his possessiveness was like an amplified speaker to anyone who even thought of sparing you a second glance.

You hated to admit it, but it was hot. The veins on his tattoo covered arms bulged with a vengeance. Each intricate pattern defining his Herculean figure.

The white T-shirt not leaving much to the imagination, your eyes lingered on his pierced lips as you passed the phone over. Earning a hum of approval from him, he tapped away on your phone.

“Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. You already follow him on Instagram?” he rhetorically asked, a mound of annoyance behind his darkening pupils.

“I follow all of my coworkers, Kookie.” you complained hesitantly, downing the rest of the red liquid that swirled in your large Burgundy glass.

“Listen, I don’t want you working with him. Simple.” he admitted, pressing the unfollow button on Hoseok’s profile.

You were beyond infuriated, you snatched your phone back pressing the follow button in an instant. Not thinking about the consequences that follow your instinctual actions. Jungkook chuckled at your sudden burst of anger.

“Have you lost your fucking mind, Y/N?” he grabbed the phone from your hand, tossing it to the plush rug, letting it slide beneath your glass coffee table.

The wine made you drunk with rage, the other part of you craving a deeper need from your hellish boyfriend. Jungkook rose from his spot on the sofa, grabbing your neck and pinning you below him. He enjoyed the feeling of your palpitating heartbeat on his fingertips.

“Baby—“ you struggled to speak, legs clasping around his knee that rest atop your unclothed hips. Bad day to only wear his shirt, you thought to yourself.

“Shut up.” he glared down at you, putting pressure between your legs.

“Since you want to act like a pathetic slut —“ he pressed his knee down harder, rubbing your clothed pussy agonizingly slow.

“I’ll treat you accordingly.” he let your neck go finally, being met with a few strained coughs from you. You had no time to react, his shirt was being pulled from your body. Your head swimming with anticipation and thoughts of Jungkook’s defilement.

You felt dizzy and exposed to the harsh temperatures of your once comfortable living room. Jungkook watched you writhing under him, a predatory smile lingering on his soft face.

“You think it’s okay to let him spend time alone with you?” he grabbed your face, pinching your cheeks between his large hand.

“Looking at you, speaking to you, touching you.” he peered over your naked body once more, eyes lingering on your bare chest, his free hand stopping above your panty line.

“All this —“ he began lustfully, “ is mine.”

He ripped your panties from your lower half, causing you to scream in frustration, fighting against his muscular arm. He let your face go, delivering 3 small slaps to your cheek. Putting you in check before he had to let whatever caged animalistic intentions loose.

“I’ve had enough of your resistance, Princess.” he whispered hotly in your ear, biting your earlobe before moving to the next ear.

“I can smell how wet you are from here, Y/N.” he bit down again, sending you into a frenzy of pathetic whimpers.

“Your cunt is crying for my attention, but you want to play with some loser?” he questioned cockily, rubbing his bare palm over your soaking pussy.

You moaned his name in retaliation, hips rutting upwards against his calloused hand. He laughed at your feeble attempts at gaining friction, pulling his hand away.

“I’m going to ruin you right here, baby.” A smirk tugged at his lips, he leaned back on the couch. Grabbing his glass from the table and downing what once was at half full capacity.

He sucked in a small breath, biting his bottom lip before turning back to you. Pulling his shirt over his head and revealing everything your eyes have been waiting for.

“I want to leave a trace of me on every inch of your body.” He stood up from his seated position, stalking over you like this was his last chance to consume you.

He yanked your ankles towards him, turning your body to face him like you were praying beneath him. Your legs hung carelessly over the edge of the couch, too dizzy to hold them up for your waiting beast. He smiled down at you in admiration, loving how ruined you already looked beneath him. Pussy leaking onto the sofa cushion, legs sprawled open for him.

“Look at you — so fucking gorgeous” he gleamed, kneeling in front of your body. He ran a hand over your stomach, letting his inquisitive fingers explore your skin.

“Fucking love your tits, Princess.” he leaned down beginning his assault on your chest, licking and sucking at your nipple like a love drunken mad man.

“More — please Kookie,” you begged, arms resting on his back, nails scratching in intricate motions. He hummed against your nipple, tongue circling the bud feverishly.

He pulled away with a lewd pop, spit dribbling down his chin. “No one’s mouth will ever feel as good as mine.”

He started kissing down the center of your chest, occasionally leaving love marks on your memorized sensitive spots. He stopped just above your panty line, loving the way your breath hitched in your throat.

He went in with a wink, tongue lapping at your exposed sensitive skin. His tongue searched your core for unanswered questions, gripping at your hips with every moan you released. He slurped against your clit letting lewd noises drown out the sound of the crackling fireplace. He released one of your hips, bringing his hand down to open your lips. Exposing your clit to the invading muscle, he latched his lips around the bundle of nerves. You screamed in pleasure clasping your shaking legs around his head.

He removed his lips from your pussy, mouth shining with your essence. He worked two fingers over your clit, sliding them down until they hovered over your entrance. He grinned down at you before he inserted them, fingering you fiercely.

“Aww, who makes you feel this good? Hmm Y/N?” He cooed happily, “Who’s pussy is this?” He mewled, setting his fingers into a come hither motion.

“Y-yours—“ you cried out desperately, feeling the knot in your stomach tighten.

He used his free hand to slap your clit repeatedly, sending you into a crying mess. Your legs closed around his arm, body writhing against his unmoving fingers. He pulled you closer and closer to your orgasm, biting his lip in concentration, relishing in the sounds you were making for him.

“Cum, baby. I want to feel you cum on my fingers before I fuck the soul out of you.” he confessed sweetly, sickeningly sweet. You groaned at his words, letting the knot in your stomach burst. You felt stars cloud your vision as his fingers continued their actions.

He used his free hand to slap your pussy again, smiling at the way you cried out for him to stop. He kept going, moaning at your cunt clenching repeatedly around his fingers.

“Koo, please” you implored weakly, hiccuping along with a string of moans.

“Please what? Stop?” he questioned teasingly, “No.”

You felt another knot forming in your lower stomach, his fingers edging you closer to a stronger orgasm. Your stomach felt funny, it felt different, like a new sensation of pleasure was pushing through.

His urged you to cum, his fingers hitting your g-spot with ease. With a few last pumps, you felt yourself release on his fingers, screaming his name in shock. You stomach twitched continuously, opening your eyes to see the aftermath of what just happened.

You opened your eyes to see Jungkook’s lower face glistening with your mess, his pupils dilated and hungry for more. You felt your cheeks grow warm, not knowing what to say next, you’ve never done that before.

“Naughty girl, why’ve you never squirted like that before? Guess I should do better, huh?” He rose from his position on the floor, giving you a second to catch your breath while he removed his shorts.

His cock sprung free from its restraints, mushroom head aggressively leaking with pre-cum. “I want you to take this dick like the slut that you are,” he pumped his hand around his length, moaning at the way you lasciviously looked at him.

He lowered himself down until he was level with your center, rubbing the tip against your sticky folds. You granted him a pitiful whine, biting the corner of your swollen lip as you watched him rub against you.

“Use your words, Y/N. I won’t hold back unless you say it,” he probed, restraining himself from slamming his hips forward. You lay quietly looking him in his eyes, daring him to take you.

“Fuck —“ he pushed into you gradually, “squeeze my dick just like that,” he groans fingers pressing heavily into your hips.

“So big, just want you,” you moaned at him, pussy clenching around his cock again. He pulled away slowly, ramming back into your hips with brute force. His balls lewdly slapping against your skin as he fucked you into the sofa. He picked up his pace, rhythmically filling the room with grunts. He reached forward taking a hold of your hair and yanked your head back, biting your exposed neck. A light sheen a sweat coated your hot skin, beads of sweat running down your cheeks as he fucked you. The living room rang with filthy words of mocking betrayal and faux empathy for your overstimulated figure.

He pressed a hand down on your lower stomach, eyes nearly bulging from his head at the feeling of his cock invading your insides. His actions made your breathing increase, hiccuping over his name. His face contorting in immense pleasure as he demanded you repeat after him.

“Say it. Tell me you love me while you take this dick, Y/N.” you felt your hips aching, knowing marks already began forming on your body.

“I love you Jungkook—“ you cried out obediently, pussy convulsing around his stilled cock. Your orgasms rushing through your bodies. You shivered at the empty feeling you felt when he removed himself. He leaned down pressing a kiss on your neck, wiping some of the sweat from your foreheads.

“I love you too.” he smiled boyishly, breathing heavy and warm on your neck. “I’m taking you to work all next week, babe.”

Masterlist!

Updated 12/28/17

(M) = Mature Content

↳ Masterposts

Sun and Moon Signs Meaning

Maknae Line

 Hyung Line

BTS in Bed (Based on Their Venus and Mars Signs) (M)

Maknae Line

Hyung Line

BTS in Bed (Based on Their Eros and Lilith Signs) (M)

Maknae Line

Hyung Line

BTS As Boyfriends

Maknae Line

Hyung Line

BTS’ Future Soulmates (Based on Juno Signs)

Maknae Line

Hyung Line

BTS Ships Analysis Series

Yoonseok

Vmon

Taejin

Namjin

Jinkook

Jikook, G.C.F in Tokyo Analysis

Jinmin

Taegi

Jihope

Taekook

Vmin

BTS Fashion Analysis

Maknae Line

Visuals Analysis

Taehyung

“Exposing BTS Series” (In Depth Natal Chart Analysis with times)

Namjoon

Jungkook

Taehyung

BTS’ Kinks Masterpost (M)

Maknae Line

Hyung Line

BTS’ Ideal Types (Based on Venus Signs)

Turn Ons and Turn Offs 

BTS’ REAL Rising/Ascendant Signs

Sun Signs That They’d Be Attracted To

Risings Signs That They’d Be Attracted To

BTS’ Erogenous Zones/How To Turn Them On (M)

Parts of a Woman’s Body BTS is Most Attracted To (M)

BTS’ Deep Wounds and Insecurities (Chiron)

BTS’ Future Marriages/Juno Houses

The Side of BTS We Don’t See/Descendant Analysis

Which Boys Fit Your Zodiac Sign?

Who You Would “Fight” Based on Your Sign

How To Make A Good First Impression 

BTS Midheaven/Public Image Analysis

Which BTS Songs Fit the Signs

BTS in Relationships (5th, 7th, and 8th House Analysis)

↳ Reactions

How They’d Act Around a Crush

BTS Cuddling

How They Express Their Anger

BTS Confessing To Their Crush

BTS In An Argument

BTS On Their Wedding Day

BTS When They’re Drunk

BTS As Dads

BTS After A Breakup

BTS As Guy Friends

BTS’ Hogwarts Houses

BTS As Classmates

BTS On Valentine’s Day

BTS’ Kissing Styles

How BTS Hugs You

BTS’ Ideal Dates

Asking To Call Them Daddy (M)

How They Sound in Bed (M)

BTS + Oral Sex (Giving) (M)

How BTS Text

How To Comfort Them (Moon Signs)

↳ MTLs

MTL To Like An Opinionated Challenging S/O

MTL To Have Sex Before Marriage (M)

MTL To Cheat

MTL To Like An Extrovert or Introvert

MTL To Be Possessive

MTL To Like Skinship

MTL To Date Someone Sarcastic

MTL To Like An Independent S/O

MTL To Fall in Love Quickly

MTL To Be Perverted/Horny All The Time (M)

MTL To Like You Wearing His Clothes

MTL To Spoil Their S/O 

↳ Misc

The Zodiac Signs As BTS Eras

Compilation of All Their Charts

Who Would Date Someone Older/Younger

Scorpio Mars/Mars Conjunct Pluto Moodboard (Jimin)

Which Members Act Different On/Off Camera

Which Members Are Doms, Subs, Or Switches (M)

Soft!Yoongi Appreciation

Hoseok Appreciation

Love Yourself: Her Prediction

The Signs as Love Yourself: Her Songs

Birthday Natal Readings: Jungkook, Namjoon, Jimin, Jin

What Careers They’d Have If They Weren’t Idols

Dance Line Style Analysis

Vocal Line Singing Analysis

BTS “Group” Natal Chart Reading

Bangtan Tea Time: Vol. 1

Note: for various astrological posts on your faves, please feel free to look through my tags for each member!

More Upcoming!

Loved this adorable story ❤️

How to Get a Guy. jjk | 02

PART 02 OF 02 | PART 01

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader | [slight] Yoongi x Reader

Genre: fluff, angst, smut, roommates!au, college!au, fuckboi!jk, enemies to friends to lovers

Summary: Star basketball player Jeon Jungkook has a reputation as the ultimate fuckboi. He’s loved by everyone. Everyone. And you would have followed suit if he had not broken all your strict Roommate Rules™ within the first week of his stay. Jungkook, on the other hand, thinks you’re absolutely bizarre. But there’s a silver lining — Mr. Fuckboi here knows basketball captain Min Yoongi, your dreadfully clueless crush. He strikes up a deal with you: he’ll teach you the ways of flirting if you lessen your load of rules (so Jungkook can continue perusing his way through the ladies on campus). Yet the longer Jungkook spends with you, the more he realizes that maybe he doesn’t want to be the campus fuckboi anymore. The problem is, how does he prove that to you?

Rating: 18+ sexual content.

Warnings: protected sex (twice..), oral (f. receiving), rough sex (1), a lot of making out, orgasm denial (for two secs methinks), titty sucking, cursing, alcohol consumption from parties, jk sleeps around (but not anymore?!), the basketball team is kinda disgusting, jk lowkey (highkey) be staking his claim but it’s seen in y/n pov, honestly jk and y/n are still hella confused

Word Count: 15.3k

a/n ✑ part dossss! thank you so much for waiting!! i adoreee this couple and i hope you enjoy the rest of their journey too <3 appreciate all of you guyss <33 (also there’s like.. one epilogue scene teehee)

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Purple Car | jungkook

➭ summary: in which jungkook is a successful solo idol and your his long time girlfriend that he hasn’t seen in almost two months. again. it’s starting to feel like your more like distant friends more than lovers so when you unexpectedly disappear, jungkook goes the distance to try to find you.

➭genre: solo idol jk x reader, drabble

➭warnings: none really. a little angsty and depressing. there’s a couple bad words

➭note: first post🥳 | heard a snippet of the acoustic version of ‘car outside’ and this was the outcome sooo feedback would be appreciated.

Jungkook’s eyes begin to strain as he stared at the blue screen with wide and glossy eyes. He didn’t care how badly he was damaging his eyes. It didn’t even cross his mind for a second. He could barely process the information that was on the screen. But still, he stared at it in disbelief. How could he care about himself when the most important person he cared about was missing?

‘nearest train station’

‘train tickets to Daegu’

According to your laptop that was the last thing you had googled. The last time you had used it being almost an hour ago.

His heavy heart sank. Would the train be gone by now?

No. He didn’t want to think of the possibility that you actually left him. You two had always talked about going to Daegu together. Going out to hotels and spending the days happily touring together.

Jungkook’s throat ran dry as he thought about the word touring. When was the last time he actually spent quality time with you? He had just came back from a month tour, promoting his new solo album. He had spent weeks prior getting ready for it and his schedule became full in an instant.

He felt bad and had always planned on making up for lost time as soon as he was done. He knew that after his company would leave him alone for once and he was set on making you his top priority after.

He always made sure to call you at least once a day when on tour, or send little gifts and things to the house in an attempt to cheer you up.

Jungkook glanced around the room, some of his latest gifts not even out of the box. At first, he was constant with the calls and gifts. They would be sweet and meaningful. But as the tour continued the more tired he got. His calls were short and late at night and his gifts became small and less frequent.

His stomach swelled with guilt at the thought. How could he do this to you? Abandon you, make promises, and give you false hope. He remembered the words he said to you to cheer you up.

‘It’ll be over soon before you know it.’

‘When I get back we’ll have the best nights of our lives.’

‘I promise to call you more babe.’

‘I promise I’m fine babe, everything will go back to normal when I’m done.’

‘Stop fucking freaking out so much.’

Most of the time, his mind was clouded by exhaustion and pressure he forgot about the things he said. It felt like all the nights before he slept was like a drunken blur. All he could remember was being on stage and wanting to do good for his fans.

Well now he remembered. All the dry talks between you two. All of the half hearted things he said while slurring, barely awake. Sometimes almost yelling at you whenever you spoke to loud or to much. It was clear as time went he became more moody and distant.

He felt sick.

On the king sized bed, next to the earlier gifts laid your phone. No wonder you hadn’t been answering your phone. Did you really go the extra mile to leave everything at home?

No, he thought again. This must mean your in the house. Maybe the shower, or you went for a walk. Why would you leave your phone?

He tapped on the screen as it lit up. His handful of text showed on the screen. Your phone was almost dead and seemed completely untouched.

12:02AM

Even though he knew you never took showers this late, he went to the master bathroom to take a peek. Nothing. There was limited places you could be hiding, and he had already checked the place once he realized you weren’t home when he first arrived. You weren’t ANYWHERE. Not even in the guest bedroom.

Now he was really starting to panic as realization set in. He had screwed up. He had played with your emotions. He had left you one to many times. Now you were leaving him.

Now he was feeling everything that you had been for the past month and a half, and every other time a big event happened. He felt abandoned, sad, ditched and empty. How the fuck did he not realize what he was doing? How did he not realize how you were feeling? Why didn’t you talk to him? Did you? Not like he could really remember if you had.

‘nearest train station’

He clicked on your past search to see the exact responds. Shit. It wasn’t that far from the house. Only fifteen minutes to be exact. And you had been ghosting him for an hour.

He sprung into action at the realization. He would just had to hope that the train didn’t leave yet. To just hope that you went to early or that you had changed your mind.

He jumps into his car. Not caring that he wasn’t even supposed to be out this late, especially not in his recognizable purple car. Something even his fans knew was his prized possession since he and your favorite color was purple. In his purple car he felt like any other normal person. Especially when you were in the car with him. Now if just felt empty.

He practically sped to the train station (he actually did go over the speed limit a little), immediately parking his car in a random lot before booking it inside the large building.

Inside, he is immediately hit by a sense of bustling activity and the sound of people rushing to catch their trains as his eyes try to scan to look for you. Even though it’s early in the morning, there’s still a bunch of people.

Even when it’s a little dark inside the station since the sun isn’t up yet, he can spot a variety of posters and signs, displaying information about train schedules, destinations, and services available at the station.

He runs to the board, looking for the word Daegu and the color from his face drains when he finds it. The last train to Daegu had left at 11pm. Almost an hour ago. And what’s even worse is that he couldn’t even get a ticket till six.

He almost growled at the board out of anger. What he wasn’t going to do was sit around for five hours while you would be at a foreign place with no phone and nothing to defend yourself with. Especially since you were arriving at such a late time. He was not going to sit around when he had a perfectly good private jet.

Jungkook didn’t care who he woke up. He was the most successful man under his company and getting even more popular around the world. If he wanted a private jet ready at twelve o clock, he was going to get it.

Jungkook would be arriving to Daegu a big whopping thirty minutes before you, and it would take him a decent amount of time to get to the train station you would be arriving it. In short, Jungkook was seriously cutting it short.

If he was even a second to late, you’d disappear into the sea of people and his chances of finding you would decrease drastically by the minute.

Despite being exhausted and sleep deprived, Jungkook couldn’t sleep on the jet. He couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat. All he could do is refrain himself from tearing out his own hair by repeating calling your number, listening to your voice mail for comfort since he knew you wouldn’t answer.

Once his phone had died, all he had was his thoughts. The depressing feeling of sorrow and loss took over him as he cried his eyes out. He missed you and he hated that he drew you away. He hate that he hurt you. He couldn’t imagine a life without you. He wanted to marry you for God’s sake. He felt like his chest was crashing the more he was away from you.

Finally, after he arrived he had a car waiting for him to take him to the train station. He had requested the same purple car he had left back at home, it didn’t feel right picking you up in an all black shaded windowed limo. Whenever you both went somewhere you took that car. You two had spent camping trips and dinner dates in that car. Sure it was newer and wasn’t his car but it was close enough.

He drove himself to the train station and ran inside the building as fast as he could. His face was hidden with a hat and mask as he tried his best to blend in with the people while still desperately trying to reach the platforms.

When he did, he saw one train already letting off a load of people. Jungkook immediately grew terrified. Did you already get off? Did he already lose you? A million thoughts ran through his head as his eyes started to water again.

He didn’t stop walking till he was at the front of the platform, watching as the people who got off with smiles reunited with family members or friends.

Jungkook watched the train empty, looking through the windows in hopes of getting a glimpse of you still inside. But it was mostly empty. You must of been one of the first people to get off. You must of been in a rush to get away from him. To start over. To leave him like he had done you.

Jungkook’s heavy head dropped, looking straight at the ground with closed eyes as tears started to fall. Grieving over the loss of his soulmate. And he could only blame himself.

He wished he could turn back time and do things differently, but he knew that was impossible. All he could do now was try to pick up the pieces of his shattered life and move forward, even though he had no idea how to do that without his wife by his side. But he would always missing you piece of his life..

“Jungkook?”

Jungkook’s body immediately froze at his name. The voice was behind him and spoke with a shaky voice but he was positive it sounded just like you. Was his mind fucking with him? Did he actually hear your voice? For the first time in a month? Were you still here? Did he still have a chance?

He swallowed a lump in his throat as he turned around, a little cautious. His breathing stopped when he met your red eyes. It was you. Only a couple steps away from him. You looked different. More skinny, you had on older clothes. Not the ones he bought you. And he could tell by your tear stained cheek and puffy eyes that you had been crying for a while. But you still looked beautiful. He missed your eyes, your touch, your smell..

Without giving it a second thought, he jumped towards you. His arms immediately wrapped around you as he gave you a tight hug and held you. His tears were spilling more violently as he sobbed into you. Relief rushed through him as he held you. You didn’t push him away, but you didn’t exactly hug him either. But he didn’t care. As long as he got to hug you. He was scared of letting you go. He didn’t want you to leave, and he didn’t want to leave either.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N.” He managed to choke out and soon enough you began to cry with him, becoming emotional in his arms. “I’m so fucking sorry.” He repeated, the first genuine words he said to you in a while. Your familiar soothing smell with the warmth of your small figure stopped him from having a full out panic attack.

“Jungkook I—“ you started to speak but he quickly shook his head, pulling away to analyze your face. He looked into your eyes with such relief and care but sadness still filled his expression. He was still scared you wouldn’t forgive him. That he had still lost you.

“I’m terrible Y/N. I didn’t realize just how much I let my job take over my life. Our life. I missed you Y/N I really did. I love you. I love you more than myself. I don’t wanna leave you anymore.” He said quickly pulling you back into a tight embrace, and this time he almost melted when your arms wrapped around him. He wanted to say so much more but he couldn’t form the words. It was paining him just seeing you cry.

“Please, give me a second chance to fix things. I’m not going anywhere without you Y/N.” He said, his desperate words spoken in a firm voice. He wanted to let you know just how serious he was about his words.

“Don’t promise anything..” you mumbled. The first proper-ish sentence you’ve said the whole time. He missed your voice, it wasn’t the same over the phone but your words stung. Did you not trust him? Did you think he would abandon you? Cause if so he’d get on his knees and propose to you right there.

“I just don’t want you to leave. I don’t want to leave you.” He sobbed into your shoulder honestly. Jungkook had always been a little shy with crying, even in front of you. But he was willing to expose himself to you. To let you know how he really felt.

“I-I won’t. Leave..” You choked out in a low voice and Jungkook was immediately over the moon. All his worries and fears washed away at your words. “I love you.” You spoke, this time in a stronger but gentle voice as his grip loosened a little around you.

He responded by pulling down his mask and kissing you with starving lips. His arms wrapped around your waist as he pulled your body against his. You kissed him back, melting in his touch as the world around you disappeared. You both had missed each others touch and you practically cried of happiness at the familiar warmth of his lips on yours.

When you pulled away to catch your breath, Jungkook leaned his forehead so it was touching yours. He closed his eyes and took everything in as he continued to hold your waist. Never would he be leaving you again. Never.

— A YEAR LATER —

“You ready for the tour baby?” Jungkook asked you in a gentle and soothing voice when he slithered behind you, wrapping his arms around you and putting his head on your shoulder. He gave you a kiss on your neck as he watched you pack your large suitcase.

“Absolutely. I can’t wait to visit all the different places.” You said with a wide smile as you leaned into his touch. When Jungkook cleared his voice you giggled. “And watch you preform of course.” A satisfied smirk showed on his lips at your response.

“Well I’m glad your happy.” He replied with a warm smile, his voice filled with joy and happiness.

Because what you didn’t know was that on the last day of the tour in Daegu, Jungkook was going to propose to you after singing Still With You.