18 - shewelcome to my delulu space

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Tobias Eaton/Four - I'm Not Going Anywhere

Tobias Eaton/Four - I'm Not Going Anywhere

Warnings: Mention of fighting, blood, injury-ish, nightmare/PTSD awakening, trauma(obviously), Caleb (his name is traumatising)

Words: 1k

A/N: Main character takes Tris’ place and Four takes care of the reader after the fight. SHE/HER PRONOUNS

Also hello, I haven't written in a while, I've been busy working just busy in general. I'll try to upload more often.

Tobias Eaton/Four - I'm Not Going Anywhere

[Y/N’s POV]

I had just got back from Erudite: after a tough evening in the tower. Caleb wasn’t very interested in helping me: which proves that faction is after all before blood. The only thing that ran through my mind in that moment was the urge to yell at him: even punch him to make his realise that we’re still family, but he does not seem to care.

The silence was loud in the staircase: buzzing through my ears as I walked down to my current faction. MY steps became loud in the narrow hallway. I stopped my track for a second, thinking someone was following me. It was probably late: I was surely imagining things.

My steps led me to the center of the underground passages before someone put their hand on my mouth. Two other pairs of arms lifted me through the air: crushing the nerves in my limbs by their strength. As my boy tried to free itself from their hold, my punches were a success after a few seconds of kicking and struggling to get out. I used all of my strength to prevent myself to fall off the edge. My hand had reached one of the guys that were ripping my own skin off of my body right now.

Al.

His face was the one to make me crack. One of the guys had punched me in the head, almost making me fall off the edge as I gained a boost of aggression to push them off of me. They almost fell off the cliff, which gave me enough time to think this through.

Why would he do this to me?

He’s my friend, is he?

What do they want from me?

Why are they trying to kill me?

Some many questions were running through my head. Two fists were placed in front of my self, waiting for them to come to me. Another one of the boys shot his fist in my face, causing me to fall down of dizziness. Blood was running down my face, especially nose causing it to throb in pain.

I couldn’t fight anymore.

But Dauntless don’t give up, at least they try to.

As if time stopped, I saw the glimpse of Al’s fist coming up only to be stopped another man stepping in. My vision was too blurry to figure out who it was. I could only see bits of action. The three abductors were down and I felt a pair of strong arms lifting me up.

“Are you alright? Can you stand up?” I could barely get words out of my mouth. The only thing that could get out a whisper, filled with pain.

“Four?”

He lifted me in his arms, carrying me out their reach as I felt my soul get out of my body. Then, all was black.

[Four’s POV]

She must have lost consciousness. I carried he back to my room, gently setting her on my bed. Her clothes were ripped from the dicks that went on her.

Right now, the only thing that mattered was her.

Y/N.

Only her.

I’ll deal with them in the morning.

I carefully slipped one of my sweater on top of her body, looking for any other wounds than her face on her.

She was all bruised and bloody. A broken nose including a head trauma. They’ll pay for that.

I took a bowl a clean water and carefully wiped blood from her knuckles, lips and even the trauma on her head.

I set a chair by my bed, not wanting to let her go of my sight.

She looked so vulnerable, I wanted to make her mine: make her safe and keep her close to me at all times.

[Some time later]

I woke up from my watch; it was still night.

She was still lying in the position, breathing deeply but shakily as well. I stood up, feeling her pulse on her soft wrist only for a few seconds. I didn’t know why her pulse was so high. She was sleeping; at least I thought so.

Her head suddenly snapped from one side to another on the pillow. Her arms lifted themselves on the top of her face; as if she was protecting herself poorly. She was whimpering; almost sobbing of pain. A few words could only come out of her mouth

“Stop, please.” I lowered myself to the level of the bed.

I tried placing my hand on her shoulder only to find her jumping awake. My own body moved as fast as hers to sit by the edge of the bed.

“You’re okay. Y/N, you’re safe” She looked lost until her eyes met mine and tears shed out of her eyes. I softly placed my hand on her cheek, carefully wiping her tears with my thumb. She was shaking.

It took all of my self control to not take her in my arms, but it wasn’t enough. I pulled her softly into my embrace, she squeezed me tight against her.

[Y/N’s POV]

Four pressed me against him, God I was so scared. I couldn’t breathe. They were all over me again, hitting me but this time I couldn’t do anything about it. Al, Chris even Will was there. They were all laughing and kicking me as if I were their punching bag.

But he was there now. Keeping me safe from them. “Thank you.” A soft whisper left my mouth, still holding on to him.

He softly took the back of my neck forcing me to face him. “Y/N, I will never, ever let them get close to you ever again. I promise you that. You will never see them again.”

“If they even think about approaching you, I will kick them over the bridge myself.”

A soft smile appeared on my face.

He softly kissed my forehead, holding me back against him.

My head suddenly felt like a tornado and he noticed as fast as I did. “Come on, lie down.”

He looked down sweetly at me.

“You probably got a concussion. Get some rest, love.”

I catched his hand before he got back in his chair. He stared down at me with his soft expression gleaming.

“Please don’t go”

He smiled sweetly.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

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More Posts from Kazbrekkerscrutches

3 years ago

"Chaos has come again."

-Nogitsune/Void


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3 years ago

me, too.

Me Every Time I Write

Me every time I write

3 years ago

James "Bucky" Barnes - With Me

Warnings: Mention of trauma/nightmare/guilt, otherwise it's fluff. REAL FLUFF

Words: 1k

James "Bucky" Barnes - With Me

Ever since I was a child, I couldn't remember anything but the tragic events of my past.

[Flashback]

My mother was taking me to this beautiful cabin in the forest. There were trees and flowers all around me. As though I felt free and safe, I knew I wasn’t. On my way out to the cabin in question, I heard a metallic, almost like a ringing sound coming from behind me.

My own mother was standing there, hold a machine-like device. It was shining, almost brighter than the sky. “Mum, what is this?” She looked at me, only to have me tear up to her gaze. “I’m sorry. I have to.”

She huffed out another word before pulling the trigger on it. My weight was launched by a man. He was dressed in a military uniform and another one was in the infamous Captain America costume. They were defeating her, until she popped one of her tooth, only to have bubbles coming out of her mouth.

“Mum.” I knew she had tried to kill me only a few minutes ago, but a part of me was left heartbroken.

She wasn’t breathing. Saints, no.

I shifted my weight to walk up to her, only to be stopped by the same pair of strong arms. “No, please. I just want t-t-to see he-er.” I looked up, only to see a beautiful man, whom had so precious blue eyes I could’ve swam in them.

He unhooked his arms and let me approach her. I hadn’t realised she was wearing a pin, containing the letters H.Y.D.R.A on it. A tear shot out of my eye, but I stood up, turning to face the males.

“Who are you?” I asked, still shaken from the previous moments.

“Steve Rogers.” The captain handed out his hand, only for me to shake it. I did, offering him a kind gesture even after what had happened.

“James Barnes.” He offered me his hand, but took mine only to take me further from my mother’s corpse.

“I’m Y/N Y/L/N, but I guess you already knew that.” He nodded sadly, only before an automobile came through the woods. I felt an arm drape over my shoulder, and as I turned my head, James was looking at me with a soft yet sad smile.

Steve and my former companion walked me towards the automobile, which led to go God knows where. His arm was still draped over my shaken body: I couldn’t stop seeing her say those words before attempting to shoot me. I closed my eyes, trying to see back the last thing she had said to me.

My attempt was interrupted by James taking my hand in his again. “What’s on your mind?” I hesitated, still surprised on how they seemed so fine about what had happened.

“I remembered that she said something before trying to kill me: Hail H.Y.D.R.A. Is that supposed to mean something?”

“They’re not the good guys. Trust me.”

My memories from my past were still haunting me at this day. Even half a century later, I still couldn’t get them out of my head.

Being a super soldier was such a burden: she tried to kill me for being a scientific project.

Steve was dead: I had lost my best friend who saved my ass more times than I couldn’t count.

But I still had James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes.

He was the one who kept me from my own sorrow.

[Now]

I was sitting in my desk, peacefully thinking when I felt a hand on my shoulder. “You, okay?” James’ soft voice made me jump a bit. I turned on my chair, finding him wearing his casual black clothes.

“I’m fine.” I responded trying to stand up, but he crouched at my level, earning a look from my tired eyes. “I’ve known you since 1943, I know when you’re lying. What’s wrong?”

He took my hands in his, approaching his head towards mine. “I can’t stop thinking about them. My mum, my dad, my brother. A second ago, I was working on a design for my bow, and the next I was submerged by my past. And I know it was my fault, I-I-I…”

“Don’t say that. It was never your fault.” Tears that were bottling up during the day shot out of my eyes, dropping onto him. “What happened to them: it was all HYDRA’s fault, and they are going to pay for that.” I locked my eyes with him, finding the sincerity in them.

He placed his hands on the side of my face, passing his fingers slightly into my hair. He then pressed his lips to my forehead, drying my tears in his palms. I leaned into his touch, finding my home in him.

“They’re all dead, smartass.” As small chuckled left my mouth.

“That’s the smile I love.” He whispered, pulling me up with him. He scooped me in his arms, hugging me so tight. I inhaled his intoxicating smell, a mix of cinnamon and firewood. He brushed his calloused fingers along my back. His actions were soothing and calming, as was his presence.

“Come on. Let’s go to bed, it’s getting late.” I didn’t even realize it was nighttime until I saw the moon shining on us. He led me to our room, where we would spend most of our evenings in.

He handled me one of his shirts, as he knew I adored them so much. I slipped that on and got comfortable in the bed. He laid by me, pulling me into his embrace and whispering sweet nothings in my ears.

“You’re so beautiful. I never, ever want to spend a day without you by my side. I love you, darling.”

I lifted up my head just enough to catch his lips onto mine. They always felt so soothing and warm. It was the most peace I’d ever experience in my life.

“I love you too, dearest.” He pressed his lips against mine again, greeting them with passion once again.

I nuzzled myself into his chest, truly falling asleep in an instant.


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3 years ago

James "Bucky" Barnes - Reality Locks In

Warnings: Mention of the Winter!Soldier, violence/gore, mention of kn!ves

Words: 1.3k

James "Bucky" Barnes - Reality Locks In

[Bucky’s POV]

I woke up in a dark room. It was freezing. The coldness made my bones shiver: making me even more confused. A feeling ran through me, making me realize that my arm wasn’t the same. I remember: my arm was replaced by a vibranium one when I fell off the train. I was supposed to be metallic, but it wasn’t.

The soft skin of my missing member felt abnormally real. The dim light of the room reflected on it, making it look even more real. As I tried to stand up, my body felt trapped in between straps. Pulling on them didn’t do anything, only making me hurt myself.

I heard a loud noise coming out of somewhere around the room. A bright light appeared, blind me quite a bit. Everything was fuzzy in my mind, as if I woke up from a dream. “Finally. You really are a deep sleeper.” A thick British accent spoke.

Could it be? Agent Carter?

I turned my head, but there was no one. For a second, I thought I was going crazy, until I heard the voice again. “Sergeant Barnes?” Another voice popped in this time, it was soft and fluttery, almost like the voice of my first love, Y/N.

“Sergeant Barnes, we need your report.” The supposed Y/N appeared again. “Show yourself first.” I spoke loudly, not expecting the echo of the room to make my ears hurt.

“Your report.” The voice changed again. It now sounded like a Russian person. I felt glimpses of pictures moving in front of my eyes. They looked almost like memories, I could see people laughing, friends, soldiers, battles, war, guns, violence and so many things. One second, I was in 1943, the next I was in another century, but there was still a common element. Y/N was always there.

I tried to remember anything about my past, but only her would come up.

[Flashback]

A very beautiful song came up through the club. I looked up to Y/N: hoping she would realise it was our song.

We always had this thing together, ever since I had met her. She was Steve’s sister, a few years older than him. She was trying to protect him when a taller guy punched him for no reasons. I was always there to stop the people who would attack him, but this time, she had gotten into it.

“Steven! Let go of him, you sick bastard!” She kicked his attacker in the back of the knee, only earning a fist on her jaw. She dropped on the ground, but got back up to show him a lesson. With luck, I pushed him away, looking at both of them. Steve stood up and went to look at her sister.

She was bleeding, her lips had a deep cut in it. I offered her my hand, as she gladly took it. “Are you alright?” I asked her softly, she nodded.

I both offered them to go to my apartment, but Steve went to the recruitment posts, still hoping to get into the army. She followed me to my appartement, clinging at my arm. I could tell that she was scared.

“Don’t worry, love. I won’t let anyone hurt you.” I whispered by her ear. She nodded and slipped her hand into mine. I gladly accepted the gesture, keeping her closer to myself. We entered my apartment, as I made her sit on a chair. I grabbed a first aid kit, honestly, I didn’t know what I was doing. I lowered myself to her level, looking deeply into her eyes.

“Does it hurt?” I asked her softly, trying not to startle her. “Not really. I’ve handled much worse, really.”

“Good. Because I don’t want to hurt you even more. This will sting a little.” I passed a disinfecting cloth on her lip, she winced at first, adjusting to the pain. I grabbed her face in my hand, getting more control to help her. After I had taken care of her, I walked towards my phonogram, playing a song I would soon recognize as ours.

“Dance with me. It’ll make you feel better.” She laughed a bit, before taking my hand as I took her in my embrace. I could feel her heartbeat slow down, still swaying to the music.

“Y/N. May I have this dance?” I asked her, as I stood up from my seat. She didn’t have that cut anymore. Steve was now Captain America, and I was just the best friend. But it felt different with her.

“You certainly may, James.” She knew I loved it when she called me by my real name. Most people called me Sergeant Barnes or for Steve, Bucky, as for James. It felt personal with her. Her body pressed on mine was heavenly. I looked down to her, swaying to the beat and kissed her right on our favorite part, I didn’t care if Steve was looking, he knew that I would never take advantage of her, nor ever hurt her,

[Present]

We separated, and just looked at each others' eyes. “I love you, James.”

“And I love you, Y/N.”

“Soldat.” Her voice made me shed another tear. Another past memory where I couldn’t feel her, where she wasn’t there.

Another man stepped into the room. He stared for a moment, then talked into another language.

Longing

Rusted

Seventeen

Daybreak

Furnace

Nine

Benign

Homecoming

One

Freight Car

A rage inside of me bottled up only by these words. My thoughts weren’t my own. Those words ached like acid inside my chest. The restrains on my limbs were loose and without realising it, I was pulling them off and attacking the false Y/N.

Anything I’ve ever felt for her just went away by a matter of seconds. She was the enemy. I had to complete my mission. Next thing I know, I heard a distant scream, mixed with sobs from the back of my head. The poor voice was begging: begging to have mercy and to remember them. “Please. James, stop. Please.”

A pulse of electricity activated another function in me. And then,

I woke up.

[Real Life]

“Please. James, stop. Please.” I didn’t see the impostor, only my Y/N. I was holding a dagger not far from her head. Tears filled up my eyes. The dagger fell from my grip, looking at her. She was scared out of her mind; her eyes were red and teary.

“I’m so sorry. I-I-I’m so sorry.” I almost fell out of consciousness when I had realized what I had done.

She stood up, took my shoulders, and pushed me into her chest. Sobs came out of my mouth involuntarily, she shushed me, soothing my back. I clinged to her, hoping she would forgive me anytime soon. “I’m so sor- “

“It’s okay, love. It’s okay. It wasn’t you.” She pulled my head from her shoulder and made me look at her. “They’ll go away.” I knew she knew that I had nightmares. I could face her gaze after almost killing her, but she forced me to look at her.

“I love you for all that you are, James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes, and that includes your past, present and future. Don’t hide from me, please.” I nodded, kissing her gently on the forehead.

“God, I don’t know what I would do without you, Y/N.” She smiled, kissing my knuckles lovingly.

“Don’t leave me, not like Steve did.”

“I will never, J. I promise.”

“Good thing that I don’t plan on leaving.”


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3 years ago

The Night of Sorrow-Part 2!

HIII

So part 2 will be out at 4:00 PM EST, which is my time in Quebec. The part 2 is already scheduled for the release. Anyways, I have loads of fun to write it and I hope that you will enjoy it even more than the first part.

Let me know on my Instagram, or even just commenting, if you want The Night of Sorrow to be a whole series!

I will add my socials to my masterlist if you want to send me private comments!

Much love and I'll see you at 4 PM!

rose <3


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