Kriimuline-blog - Luulud

And a dog never ever hints me something and is later mad that I did not understand his obvious hint.

i feel like when some ppl say 'i like animals more than people' it comes with the heavy undertone of seeing humans as inherently bad or impure somehow but. i can recognize human beings are capable of kindness and deserve to be treated kindly/justly too. i just also have autism and hamsters arent going to ask me what my salary is and my cats arent going to call me a faggot even if they probably would if they knew the word

Mormon Missionary Positions, Neil Dacosta, 2012

the thing that sucks is that people love saying sleep early is good etc etc and yeah it is. I've seen some benefits before. but I think it sucks to ignore that late night is the only time with any freedom. I think it sucks to not acknowledge the dread in waking up and it's a work day again

I was over 40, when I finally understood that my desire to be in some love-kind of partnership with someone (gender not important) was society whispering in my head: "You as a lone person are worth much less than you as part of pair. Woman needs a man to be totally acceptable, lone woman is sad and pathetic. Ok, when you are lesbian, you can be part of the pair with a woman - but it is basically only exeption." I could do with no sex, I could handle my life financially and did not miss more meetings with people - but still I felt terrible, when my very very good (platonic) friend did not want to be my "partner". Even if "being my partner" meant just a word. Nothing would actually change, just a word - but this word was so important to me, that I stopped interacting with him when he refused to use it. Half a year later he wrote me, saying: "I admit, you were my significant other". And I was so happy. We started being very good friends again. I felt accepted and whole. Fuck. And it took a year more to me to undertand, how sick it was. How sick is to think that I am somehow lesser if I don't have "significant other". I don't need one. You don't need one. We are whole as we are.

Unpopular opinion: no one owes you a romantic relationship

I see a lot of videos and posts of women encouraging women on how to vet men, make sure they have secure boundaries and standards, etc, which is all very important and necessary when it comes to trying to date and all that. But I just feel like no one talks about possibly embracing the reality that in the chance that you don't end up paired up with someone (especially for life) that it's okay and doesn't make you less of a person and that being happily, mindfully single is a real thing.

It's not that I think romantic love and romantic relationships are a bad thing, but I do think that they are highly overrated ideals in our society and too many people are going through life believing that someone "owes" it to them to pick them, find them desirable, or find them as a worthy partner.

I look around and folks sometimes and I see them obsessing/stressing about dating, and finding their "Forever Person" and treating singlehood like it's this disease for which the only cure is monogamy/matrimony, and sometimes I want to ask them "If you found out that you were never meant to be paired up with someone for the rest of your life, or if you knew that no one would ever find you romantically/sexually desirable again. . .would you live your life any differently?"

Again, I'm not saying that desiring romantic relationships is wrong, but people have a way of making seem like romantic love is superior to other types of love, and that other meaningful types of relationships or connections are of lesser value. I think that's why there are so many lonely people out here right now, they're so obsessed with having this one form of love that they don't know how to create or maintain non-physical, platonic bonds which can be just as strong, amazing, fulfilling, and life changing.

Exactly. I am so sexual that I rubbed myself against the chair as a teenager. In relationships - there have been some - I was always the hornier one. In years and years with no relationship and so no sex, I mastrubated imaging fantasy-men in fantasy-situations as I knew them much more intimatedly than real ones. And I'm "gray", "not really sexual", "something in betweewn"? Shit, I am totally sexual!!! 100%. Just - it takes knowing someone real well to start me to want them. And fantasy-men are much easier to know than real ones. Come on, I READ TEIR MINDS from the books! "He thought." "He felt." "He wanted to lie, but somehow spoke the truth." But I can not read real men's minds ever. I don't know for sure anything. Only if I have known them for a long time I can start to think: "He is like that, yeah. Does not like to admit he has been wrong," or smthng like that. Usually by the time I start to want man, he no longer wants me. I am a friend. Like a sister. Very interesting person - but no more beautiful and hot woman.

So IRL sex is difficult. But I am not asexual, far far far from it!

The Demisexual/Demiromantic experience is

...being unable to relate to Allo and Aroace narratives. We're both and neither.