Adhd - Tumblr Posts
These messages really do get a lot longer than expected, lol.
I could go into more detail about a lot of things, but then we'd probably be at this like all day, lol. While that'd be fun, it's probably better to not do that, lol.
Just want to say that you're really cool! And it's really great talking with you! I don't really have many people to talk to about all this, so it's really nice being able to ramble about memories with someone!
I just realized that I typed Shoto with the u, which he didn't have in my canon, lol. So ignore the u, I'm too lazy to go and change it, lol.
I'm glad that you told Toga Himiko that her quirk doesn't make her evil. I remember that when I first met her after the training camp [I wasn't really involved in that fight anyways], I told her that I had been called tons of names and shit because of my quirk.
I was called "Monster" "Freak" "Evil" etc.
But the one that really 'stuck' was being told that "Not even a villain would want your quirk." So, uh yeah, that sucks. They were basically saying that my quirk was so useless and bad that no one would ever want it. It's what made it easier for me to see people with "evil" or "villain" or "useless" or whatever other word people said quirks as good and deserving of love and worth so much. Quirks are really just a tool in a way. It's how someone uses it that makes the person. Quirkless people are also worth so much, and I wish that people had seen that more.
I remember giving Toga some of my blood on that day that I actually met her [this happened before I was adopted. It was like right after the dorms were made] and saying something like, "I won't let someone starve if I could help them." Cause at least in my canon, she needed to drink blood to live, so yeah. Quirk diets or whatever you wanna call them suck [I had to eat more meat and sometimes needed to eat what would essentially be raw meat, it was slightly cooked but not quite rare, but it wasn't fully raw, idk. I just know it sucked cause of being scared of how people would see me.].
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx)
Hello, I decided to come say hi and shit in an ask, lol.
I'm not good at starting conversations, but I would like to hear about any alterhuman or nonhuman experiences or memories or anything that'd you'd be willing to share!
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it) | a fellow noncanon MHA being/creature :3c
aaa hihi!! good to hear from you, i definitely feel you on the 'bad at starting conversations' lol!
the first thing that comes to mind a memory of playing video games with Tomura and Shuichi. I wasn't very good at it, but it was good bonding and i loved playing with them. I would only play the 'silly' games like Mario Kart or Smash Bros, they got too into the 'serious' ones for me. I finished in last place every time lmao, so i mostly spent my time teasing whoever was in second place. Dabi would sit with us too sometimes, either lazily scrolling on his phone or bothering the three of us, trying to help whoever would give him the most attention lol. The others joined in sometimes too, Himiko and Jin and rarely Sho and Toshi if they were hanging out. Himiko would shriek excitedly and bump us while Jin cheered her on and cursed her out. It was good.
Thanks for giving me the opportunity to ramble lol!! Feel free to share any memories/thoughts you have :D
Random, but can any systems/plural beings talk about how they figured out that they are plural?
DID, OSDD, endo, etc. Any version of systems or plurals
I have questioned DID or something similar to just myself and 1 or 2 friends irl before. I'm unsure if my trauma was "enough" or happened at "the right time" or whatever to be able to cause a dissociative disorder.
If anyone has any websites or similar things to suggest to help me, pls send me them.
I mostly try and stay out of plural/system things cause once again I am unsure if I am one in any way. And to go into a community that I am not sure I am in feels off.
Using I/me/my/etc. sometimes feels wrong, and we/us/our/etc. feel right even if just referring to "me." But sometimes I/me/my/etc. feels fine/right, so idk.
Please give me advice or at least share your experiences if you're able/willing to. Thanks
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx) [if I find out I'm a system/plural in some way, this sign off thing will probably be changed around].
Tw: sexual assault mentioned, trauma/ptsd, I think that's it? All of this is pretty much just past life, and it's not explicit, just mentioned by name.
Anyone else who experienced trauma in a past life that they haven't experienced in your current life, how do you deal with it?
I haven't ever been SAed in this life but I am pretty sure that I was at least once in a past life [maybe multiple past lifes, Zuki is the one that I am meaning rn]. And I have no real idea of how to go about dealing with this.
I feel shitty cause, like I've said, I have never been through that in this life, but it still affects me about as much as if I had. And I don't really know how to talk about this shit with people cause idk how they would react, even those that support and love me as I am [alterhuman/nonhuman stuff included] but having trauma from my past life that I haven't experienced here is kinda different.
Idk, I just want to know if anyone has any advice or anything for this situation.
Sorry for this type of post, I try not to bring too much stuff like this into my account, but I feel like I need to. I'll try and keep my posts more light-hearted or, at least of course, give trigger warnings or content warnings when they're not light-hearted.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/hx/it)
I'm a bit bored, I should probably work on English class work, but my brain says no, and I have no real control, lol.
Anyways, fictionkin shit, this is gonna be talking about my biological parents as Zuki, so there will be trigger warnings. All of this is just to do with my life as Zuki, I have problems with my parents here, but not as bad.
Tw: hinted at sexual assult not said by name but still, physical abuse, emotional abuse, verbal abuse, child abuse, bullying, scars, burning/fire, and maybe more? Idk if there's anything to add, let me know.
My bio father as Zuki was a horrible abusive asshole. He was not the first guy to get my bio mother pregnant [as my old sibling is my half-sibling from my mom]. He told my mother that if she just had one kid with him, then he would be "happy" (not his actual words but whatever). So I was the kid that came from this "agreement".
But when I actually got the first part[s] of my quirk at the age of 4, which included wings (which came from my sib's bio father pretty much, it's hard to explain exactly), he was fucking pissed but couldn't do anything cause my mother did what he wanted, she had one kid with him (just not the kid he wanted).
At the age of 7, the other part of my quirk came in. Which is/was essentially the ability to "drop" my body and become a "spirit," I guess you could say. It freaked people out, causing a lot of bullying and shit. Anyways, that just made my bio father [I hate calling him that, but whatever] hate me more.
He was always "aggressive" and abusive, I mean, he didn't get physical to me until I was around 5 or so. I also couldn't actually speak until I was at least 7, and then it was about at a like 2 year old level, basically. Anyways, he got physically abusive towards me when I was like 5, but he was always verbally and emotionally abusive towards me.
When I was like 11, my bio father got put into jail cause my old sib got into UA and told Aizawa about him and shit. I was happy that I was "free" from abuse [I wasn't really, but I was at least free from him].
My bio mother had an alcohol problem and would drink a whole lot. She wasn't really ever physically abusive when I was younger. But after my bio father got put in jail, it actually seemed to get worse with her towards me. Idk why exactly, but I believe it had to do with me kinda looking like my bio father and also my bio mother (she definitely had problems with self image and took it out on me).
My old sib didn't see the abusive side of our mother at all. They were the favorite child, they didn't look as much like our mother, I guess. They had seen only the loving side of our mother, which I knew existed but rarely saw when I was alone with her.
I always had a hard time admitting that my mother was abusive and shit. To me, it was deserved cause I was an unwanted pup that she was forced to have and care for. She still wasn't typically physically abusive.
When I was like 12 or 13, my bio mother left me alone in the house. She had slapped me to the ground before fully leaving as I was quietly "screaming" for her to not leave me. My older sib never knew this. As far as they knew, our mother was just really busy with hero work [I forgot to mention that both of my bio parents were heroes]. The only time our mother would be at the house is if I had called or texted her about my old sibling wanting to see her and shit. Then she would come home and act like everything was fine and that she still lived there and took care of me.
That went on until I was like 15, it was my second year in high school [another reminder that UA is a college and I was 18 in my canon]. My bio mother had been in a bad villain attack and was at the hospital and would never do hero work again and would have to be in the hospital for a while (years). After that happened, my old sib ended up becoming my legal guardian and shit.
My old sib was pretty busy with hero work since they were pretty much just starting out with their hero career. They asked Izuku's mom [Auntie Inko as I called her] to look out for me a lot, as she already was, and because me and Izuku were childhood friends who were re-becoming friends again.
Pretty sure if Auntie Inko had the full ability to support another child legally and shit, she would've adopted me. I was not an easy pup to deal with, though. I was very suspicious of her kindness and would fight her [I bit her a few times cause of being fearful and shit, I really regret that and shit]. I was sure that she would abandon me as well one day, of course this never happened [think of the moment in the movie Bolt where Mittens is talking about how "Penny is fake" that was kind of how I was with Izuku and his mom at first].
Anyways, Auntie Inko ended up basically being my parent until I got adopted by Dadzawa and Papamic.
I'm gonna go into a bit more detail, but not too much detail about my bio father's abuse now.
His quirk gave him wolf claws [not necessarily always out, but he kept them out almost all the time] that were able to use some of the elements (fire, water, etc. I guess) to hurt. It's kinda hard to explain rn, but basically, he could have his claws on fire [I use that example cause it was his favorite].
He would use his "fire claws" on me a lot when he wanted to hurt me. He burned me a lot with them, I had so many scars from him doing this a lot. I had one scar across my face that I got from one of those times that I hid with makeup for a long time. Eventually, I gave up hiding it, and when my friends asked about it, I would say it was old, and I just used to cover it up.
His abuse in this way made me very cautious around fire and shit [so yes I was very cautious and scared when Todoroki first started using his fire but I of course never said anything cause I was not about to discourage his use of his fire]. Fur and feathers don't really go with fire anyway, so yeah.
Idk if there's anything else I want to say but at least for right now, this is good. Sorry for 2 vent(?) posts back to back.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/hx/it)
I wanna make it clear that while I check my posts multiple times before posting, there could always be spelling or grammar mistakes or even words used wrong or weirdly.
I have a learning disability [it's called Specific Learning Disability on my paperwork, lol], as well as being autistic and ADHD. So keep all of that in mind if you see mistakes in my posts. Also, if you are polite about it, do feel free to correct me.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it)
I love liking MHA and RWBY. And having one confirmed kin [and a questioning kin as well] from one and questioning a kin for the other.
Like they are both animes with powers that are called something different [quirks and semblances respectively]. Also, hero schools [not called a hero school in RWBY but whatever, that's what it is].
There are probably more similarities than these, these are just what came to mind rn.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it) | Cyan Lupo (They/it) [what I am using for my questioning RWBY OCkin]
Edit of like not even a minute later, they are both hated on and probably thought of as cringe.
I have been really going through it with bad memories from my life as Zuki lately, lol.
So, instead, I wanna share some good memories I have so I can balance out the bad.
Since I was like an older sibling to Izuku, I would let him help me preen my wings and shit, which is a thing for mostly family [and mates]. He was one of the only ones that I allowed to do this for a long time. Eventually, others from Class 1A got added to the list of people who were allowed to even touch my wings, let alone preen them. Hikari, my queer platonic partner, was the second person who I allowed to preen my wings [of my class], we may not have been romantic, but they were still my mate. Hitoshi was the third cause he was my little brother, legally this time, lol. Toshi was the least likely to ask to preen my wings though, even after getting permission to ask, I would usually have to ask him if he wanted to help for him to feel like he could, lol [it did come from his trauma though so it's ok, love you bro]. I allowed Denki to touch my wings and tail cause it would help with his ADHD sometimes, which mood I would play with my own tail to help my ADHD, lol. There are others, but these are the ones I feel like sharing rn.
Bro, I remember hanging out with the "girls" [I use quotes cause not everyone identified as a girl/woman]. We would have "girl's night," which once again not everyone identified with that gender but it's pretty much what we would call it, lol. It was fun. We would paint each other's nails. The ones who knew makeup and shit would help those who wanted to learn. And we would just talk about shit. I miss these "girl's nights" so much.
I miss the game nights we would have as a whole class. We had to ban some games cause of how people got, lol. Monopoly was the first one to be banned, lol. We would play Uno the most, even though people got very competitive [*cough* Bakugo and me mainly *cough*]. We also had to ban truth or dare, and I will not be explaining why, I think it's obvious why. Would you rather and never have I ever were allowed though, lol.
Dadzawa and Papamic would take me, Eri, and Toshi to do fun activities, such as arts and crafts, go trick or treating, and other fun shit, lol. I would usually end up carrying Eri at some point cause she loved to be carried, and it helped with my protective instincts, lol. I would usually wrap my wings around her while holding her, and she loved it. If someone who is good at art would draw that for me, I would love it [I don't have money rn so I'm not gonna commission anyone right now, but I might when I get enough money, lol].
I would never have described myself as good with kids, and I would say that I wasn't a lot. My friends and family tended to disagree with me there. They would bring up how good I was with Eri, Kota, and a kid who is not canon. But I would bring up in response that they were all traumatized kids that I latched onto in a sibling way mainly but also cause I saw bits of myself in them and didn't want them to not have someone. Other kids I was definitely not good with. I would say I'm not really good with kids in this life, even though at the church I am forced to go to, I help with the kids, lol. Kids are kinda weird.
I remember Remo, my service dog, and despite the fact that I had been so fucking upset that I needed another being/creature with me to function, I loved him. I remember when I would have him off duty and use my quirk to become a little wolfdog with wings spirit thing and play with him, lol. I also used that to play with Hikari, whose quirk let them become certain animals, lol. It was very fun to do these things and I miss being able to do that.
I really miss everyone. I miss my life as Zuki. I miss my pack. I miss my wings. I miss my tail. I miss my ears. I miss my sharp teeth. I miss my claws. I miss being Zuki physically.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/xe)
[Before I start, I wanna say I am slightly age regressed rn, so if my message is off or different, that's probably why, lol].
Mood, I was a few predatory animals, lol [wolf, dog, cat, I am unsure if a crow is a predator but if so that too, lol].
I tried to be a good friend to all of my friends, including Toga. Toga and I got along cause of relating with quirk discrimination and quirk diet stuff.
It definitely is cool swapping memories!!!
I've been dealing with a lot of bad memories from my life as Zuki coming back to my mind today, so to talk about better memories and stuff is nice. I mean, yeah, we are talking about bad stuff to do with quirks slightly, but still.
Anyways yeah, it's really cool talking about memories with you!!!
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/xe/it)
Edit: forgot tags, lol
Hello, I decided to come say hi and shit in an ask, lol.
I'm not good at starting conversations, but I would like to hear about any alterhuman or nonhuman experiences or memories or anything that'd you'd be willing to share!
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it) | a fellow noncanon MHA being/creature :3c
aaa hihi!! good to hear from you, i definitely feel you on the 'bad at starting conversations' lol!
the first thing that comes to mind a memory of playing video games with Tomura and Shuichi. I wasn't very good at it, but it was good bonding and i loved playing with them. I would only play the 'silly' games like Mario Kart or Smash Bros, they got too into the 'serious' ones for me. I finished in last place every time lmao, so i mostly spent my time teasing whoever was in second place. Dabi would sit with us too sometimes, either lazily scrolling on his phone or bothering the three of us, trying to help whoever would give him the most attention lol. The others joined in sometimes too, Himiko and Jin and rarely Sho and Toshi if they were hanging out. Himiko would shriek excitedly and bump us while Jin cheered her on and cursed her out. It was good.
Thanks for giving me the opportunity to ramble lol!! Feel free to share any memories/thoughts you have :D
I mostly try and stay off of Tumblr too much when I'm age regressed cause I never know what I'll see cause not everything is tagged well and stuff.
However, I am on rn while regressed, lol. I wanna talk about memories [happier ones] to do with agere in my life as Zuki.
While I am very much in a partly regressed partly not most of the time in this life, I could fully regress most of the time in my life as Zuki.
When I was regressed, I liked to be called pup by a few people that I gave permission to. Dad and pa had permission as did Toshi and Zuku. Also Kari and Kats, lol.
Kats rarely called me pup though and it wasn't around others really, reputation or something like that, lol.
Being called pup always helped me with regressing as well, so it was pretty much just used when I was already regressed or wanting or needing to regress, lol.
Dad would be able to tell when I needed to regress even if I said I didn't want or need to, lol. He would usually call me pup when he noticed, and then I would regress almost instantly. Sometimes, I would say I wasn't little when I was regressed, lol.
Pa had a harder time seeing through my lies or whatever you wanna call them, lol. But was very great when I was regressed and he knew about it.
Zuku had an even easier time knowing this stuff than dad did cause he knew me longer and stuff. The first person to know about my regression and one of my favorites to go to.
Toshi, like pa, had a hard time knowing this stuff. But was amazing when he took care of me when I was little.
Kari knew almost as much as Zuku, lol. Kari also regressed sometimes [as did Zuku and Toshi and some others], so that helped. They were one of the ones I loved being around best while regressed, but all the ones mentioned are the best ones I loved being around, lol.
Kats knew a little less than Zuku but about the same as dad. He was also cool to be around while I was little, although you probably wouldn't guess that, lol.
This is all I'm gonna mention rn, so yeah.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/xe) :3c
DUDE YES PREENING!!
I made a post about that a bit, lol. Yeah, it's very much a pack thing! At first, only very few people were allowed to touch my wings at all, lol. Eventually, more people were added to that list, but the list of people who could actually preen my wings was still pretty small (around 6-8 people I think), lol. It's a very intimate thing, it's a pack thing, it's special.
I really consider/considered my whole class as my pack, but not everyone was in the same "category" of what they could do, if you get what I mean. Like not everyone was given permission to preen my wings and not everyone could suprise me with hugs or any touches without getting bit or something [very, very few people were in this category, mostly cause I got used to the little noises and shit they would make/do when they were about to touch me, lol. So it wasn't fully a suprise and shit.]
Also yeah looking at the actual canon for MHA, it's pretty fucking bad for my pack. I mean, we all had trouble and shit in my canon, but considering my canon didn't have the actual war and shit, it wasn't as bad in some ways. So it's nice to know that I was there for my pack as they were there for me.
Dude, I miss being able to fly. I also have to have a fear of heights in this life, sadly.
I really didn't learn how to fly until after the dorms were made at UA, lol. To be fair, I didn't really have anyone to properly teach me about flying with my wings when I was younger. My older sibling would've had to be the one to do that, and they were busy a lot when it would've been the time to teach me really, and they had to learn on their own so they weren't thinking about having to teach me, lol. I was lucky that I had Hikari [another noncanon being] to help me cause they also had wings and shit. Though their wings were of a different type [my wings were that of like a crow, and I can't quite remember what type of bird their wings were like.] They were still one of the best in helping me with learning to fly.
I don't mention much about my quirk, except for my wings, ears, and tail, lol. But the other "part" of my quirk let me essentially become a spirit like thing, which with that my form was a wolfdog with wings, lol. I could fly just fine in that form, just not in my "normal" form for some reason. Idk why that is exactly, but whatever.
It's missing my pack hours, lol.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/ze) :3c
Edit: fixed a mistake/typo
Hello, I decided to come say hi and shit in an ask, lol.
I'm not good at starting conversations, but I would like to hear about any alterhuman or nonhuman experiences or memories or anything that'd you'd be willing to share!
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it) | a fellow noncanon MHA being/creature :3c
aaa hihi!! good to hear from you, i definitely feel you on the 'bad at starting conversations' lol!
the first thing that comes to mind a memory of playing video games with Tomura and Shuichi. I wasn't very good at it, but it was good bonding and i loved playing with them. I would only play the 'silly' games like Mario Kart or Smash Bros, they got too into the 'serious' ones for me. I finished in last place every time lmao, so i mostly spent my time teasing whoever was in second place. Dabi would sit with us too sometimes, either lazily scrolling on his phone or bothering the three of us, trying to help whoever would give him the most attention lol. The others joined in sometimes too, Himiko and Jin and rarely Sho and Toshi if they were hanging out. Himiko would shriek excitedly and bump us while Jin cheered her on and cursed her out. It was good.
Thanks for giving me the opportunity to ramble lol!! Feel free to share any memories/thoughts you have :D
When I once again remember that I need to go to therapy in this life. But because I still live with my dad and older brother [I am only 19 before you say anything and am also disabled in multiple ways] I would likely be forced into or "recommended" a Christian therapy place when I am not a Christian (my dad and brother do not know that and they won't until I move out).
This is why I don't see a therapist rn, pretty much, lol. I need to find one, though, and would really like one that will understand and accept my alterhumanity/nonhumanity and shit.
Random little rant/vent? Not really a vent, but idk what to call this
More bad memories from my life as Zuki. Cause of course my brain hates me.
Tw: abuse, school abuse[? Idk what to call it], muzzles, quirk discrimination, shock collars, bullying, I think that's it for this one?
When I was younger, my bio mother was told to use a muzzle and shock collar that "neutralized" quirks on me. Cause my quirk was "dangerous" and "needed to be controlled." These were supposed to be illegal to use on anyone, even the most dangerous villain. But of course, people didn't listen and used them on those with "evil" or "villain" quirks (especially certain mutant related quirks).
It kinda makes sense that a hero like my bio mother could get one, but what's 'interesting' is that once I got into middle school, some of the teachers also had them. I don't know where they got them, but whatever. My middle school and high school both used the muzzles and shock collars on me.
When I was in middle school, I was still very cautious and shit. I never fought back, I never started a fight, I never did any of that. But yet anytime someone attacked me, I got punished. They would put the muzzle on me saying something about how I was bad and deserved it and the same thing with the shock collar. But 'luckily' the shock collar was less often used.
In high school is when I started fighting back sometimes. It was still usually only if someone else was being hurt [whether physically or verbally]. When it was just me, I would usually not fight back. Sometimes, I did fight back when it was just against me fully, though.
This is all I'm gonna talk about rn.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/he)
Looking through a few poems I made. Would anyone want me to post some of them? Some would probably need tw or cw, lol. I use poems to vent. They also wouldn't be that good.
Just curious if anyone would want to see my poems, lol.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx)
First poem to post, lol.
No tw or cw I can think of.
This poem is very dog related.
The formatting is different on here than it was on my notes app, so it might seem weird. Although it might have seemed weird anyway, lol.
You Taught Me/Bad Dog
You taught me to fight
Yet when I fight
You label me a
Bad dog
You taught me to bite
But when I bite
You call me a
Bad dog
You taught me to growl
Yet when I growl
You say I'm a
Bad dog
You taught me this
But when I listen
You declare me a
Bad dog
You taught me
Yet I listen and
You insist I'm a
Bad dog
You taught me
How to be a
Bad dog
Second poem to post.
Tw/cw: abuse but not named. Nothing else I can think of but let me know if you find anymore.
Another canine/dog related poem.
Trying something different with the read more thing being after the title of the poem.
I love like a dog
I love like a dog
Always going back
To people who hurt me
Cause that's what I
Was taught that love is
I love like a dog
Always letting people
I love hurt me
Cause that's what I
Was taught that love is
I love like a dog
Always waiting for
People to hurt me
Cause that's what I
Was taught that love is
I love like a dog
I hurt the people
I love just the same
Cause that's what I
Was taught that love is
Rebloging this post so hopefully more people will see it again.
I will NOT be answering/posting any donation asks. This is not something that I am able to do in a proper way.
Any donation asks I get are deleted. I'm sorry, but this is how it is on my blog.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/hx/it)
I'm gonna talk about something that's not kin [alterhuman or nonhuman] related real quick.
My account is not really gonna be a place for a lot of donation asks, I am sorry, but I don't have the time or energy to really check each ask to make sure it's real or anything. I didn't do this for any of the previous ones I uploaded, so bare that in mind when you see them.
I probably won't upload any more asks about donations, once again I am really sorry but it's just not something I can check up on in a way that makes it feel like I wouldn't be maybe helping people get away with lying. I am not saying any of the ones I uploaded or that I've been getting are lies, cause I don't know and that's why I am not answering/uploading posts with any of these asks.
I hope everyone understands where I am coming from and if they need help, I hope they get the help they need.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/xe)
Edit Oct 8th: I am gonna be deleting the posts I have posted of the donation asks cause I keep getting anxiety about how they might not be genuine and shit but idk if they are or not, I just know that if I don't delete them my brain is saying bad things will happen so yeah. Sorry for those that sent the asks that I posted but I am deleting the posts.
New intro post, you can see my old intro posts by looking for "intro post" as a tag on my blog.
Hello, this is mainly my fictionkin account for my ockin, Zuki Shay Hara-Lupo. I am a noncanon MHA/BNHA being/creature. You can call me Zuki, Shay, or Lupo, whatever you prefer!
My canon was divergent from the manga and anime. If you want to know more about my canon, send in an ask, or you can see some things on my original intro posts. The only thing I will mention here is that UA was a college instead of a high school, so my class and I were all 18 at the start of the first year at UA.
In this life, I am currently 19, so keep that in mind. I don't mind minors interacting. Just know I am more hesitant to interact with minors myself.
I try and make sure my posts are all tagged well, especially for tw or cw, if you see a post of mine that doesn't have a tw or cw that needs to be tagged tagged, then let me know and I'll fix it.
I am alterhuman/nonhuman in more ways in this life and in my life as Zuki, so that will also be brought up on my account.
I will not answer/post any donation asks if you want to know why you should be able to find the posts I made about it by using the tag "donation asks".
I will block for any reason. Especially when it comes to hate.
This is an endo safe space. I will not judge systems/plural beings for their origins. If you don't like this, leave.
I am also disabled, both in this life and in my life as Zuki, so that will also be on my blog. [In this life for all the ones after this]. I am autistic and ADHD for sure. I have a learning disability and depression as well diagnosed. I believe I might have OCD and PTSD but am not sure yet. I know I have some form of anxiety, but it's not diagnosed.
Because of my disabilities, I need a service dog in this life. [I also had one as Zuki]. I will likely post more about the service dog when I finally get my stuff together and do more about it.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/he/hx/xe/ze/it + more neos/xenos) | currently a they/hx/it time for my pronouns
3rd & 4th poems to post. Posting these together cause they are related.
Tw/cw: violence(?), tearing skin, and bone mention.
Bare my Teeth and Tear 'my' Skin & Bare my Claws and Tear 'my' Skin
I want to bare my teeth
And tear at 'my' skin
Until all that's left
Is the bone underneath
For the bone will be
More right than the skin
Despite it still
Being wrong
But I cannot
For this body's
Teeth are not sharp
Enough to tear the skin
So I bare my teeth
At the image in the mirror
For it is wrong
It is not right
-------------------------------------------------------
I want to bare my claws
And tear at 'my' skin
Until all that's left
Is the bone underneath
For the bone will be
More right than the skin
Despite it still
Being wrong
But I cannot
For this body's
'Nails' are not sharp
Enough to tear the skin
So I bare my claws
At the image in the mirror
For it is wrong
It is not right
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it)
If I remember to actually check my asks, I'll participate!
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it)
alterhuman trick-or-treat!
as october comes to an end, the time for Spooky approaches. the creatures of the night awaken, their reflecting eyes shine in the darkness. and what better way to celebrate than a good old trick-or-treat?
inbox trick-or-treating is a beloved tradition here on tumblr, which consists in sending an ask to the blog(s) of you choice as if they were houses in your neighborhood and you were the kid politely knocking on their door. you would ask, "trick or treat?" and the asked would then choose whether to reply with a treat (picture of candy) or a trick (a joke, a poem, a haiku, a drawing...).
well... thats the normal one anyways.

i propose something a bit different this year: an alterhuman-themed trick-or-treat! what is that, youll ask? simple: the 31st of october, instead of sharing candy, we will share our 'types snacks! for example, if youre a cat therian you can share a fish-shaped treat, if youre fictionkin you can share your favorite food from your source, if youre alienkin you can share your cultures traditional dish... the possibilities are endless!
how to participate? reblog this post to let your followers know youre doing this! the 31st ill send an ask to everyone who interacted with this post so no one misses out on the fun. see you on halloween!

I have like nothing to add. Just mash face like cat.
- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/xe)
genuinely fucked up that if i want to interact with someone online i have to say words and have a conversation instead of just mashing my face against them like a cat