Idkw But The Fact That Your Bio Is Titled "memoirs Of A Sorcerer's Apprentice" Really Cracks Me Up. Especially

Idkw but the fact that your bio is titled "memoirs of a sorcerer's apprentice" really cracks me up. Especially with your background banner. 😂

Eey thanks! I strive to remain wizardly at all times, and I am truly pleased to meet another connoisseur of Plague birdmen.

🔮

I'm. Allergic to my shirt. Too allergic to my shirt. So allergic it hurts.

A "Power Leadership" seminar? I'd rather lock myself in my house and pull out all of my hairs one by one with rusty tweezers. To be fair I have trichtillomania so that's what i'd rather be doing most of the time, but still.

Dandelion Potion

Take thou the heads of five dandelions newly gone to the seed.

With gentle hand, separate the seed from the hoary white fluff

Add the fluff to one half-measure of purest hose water upon a chilléd morn.

Benefits:

Makes you choke instantly

That's it.

Unless you're making bananas foster, then it will jailbreak your chi

spray on sunscreen a good substitute for cooking spray trust me I’m a chef

Wore a pair to school as an april fool's gag one. Nobody said anything and I was tired of drooling so I took them out and it turns out people had noticed and they were wracking their brains trying to remember if my teeth were always like that and trying not to be rude by asking.

i always hated when ppl would say "smile!" as a kid and then when u didnt smilw with ur teeth they told u to. wdym smile with your teeth. what. what do u mean smilinf without your teeth isnt a real smile what