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Babe what’s wrong? You’ve barely touched your spicy beans that… attract the birds

Willy McDuff:

I am so scared right now. Why is the snot one his favorite? Why does he have (seemingly?) viagra beans? Aphrodiasiac beans? Something? Why any of this?

Love how they script the audience reactions. That, or they were planning on hiring at least 2 actors to be plants in every tour.

Presented without comment:

Having a great time at the Glasgow Willy Wonka Experience.

Little old Italian lady: Do you have zucchini?

Me: Yes, right here.

Lady: Is how much?

Me: $2.99 a pound.

Lady: It's usually $1.49.

Me: Yes, in the summer.

Lady, pauses, then grabs two: I put it in a soup.

Me: Oh nice, what kind are you making?

Lady: You will not fantasize about my soup.

And then she walked away. "You will not fantasize about my soup" will be in my head forever. I love you, little old Italian lady.

Love how Terra Prime made Elizabeth to be all "look at this horrible GENETIC FREAK! This MONSTER will surely spark public revulsion" and she's just like:

That is an actual pixie. Little fairy baby. In what universe was that supposed to work?

@honesttoglob i saw a chance and i FUCKING TOOK IT.

He’s hunting him down

I hate this 👍

Why do all your posts have like 4 notes or less? I see your comments everywhere and expected you to be a bigger blog but no

My imageposts do ok but I make so few of them that I haven't got much blog consistency I think. I still love being a chatterbox in the comments though! Thanks for the ask! Nice to be noticed in this big ol internet soup.

Very Normal Youtube ad I just got.

I've always been a horror fan but being on SSRIs absolutely nuked my fear response and I consumed horror content at a RAPID pace without thinking anything of it.

Now I'm laddering down a bit, figured I'd partake in a little of my favorite genre and WHOAH I'm a wuss now. I'm a raw nerve. I'm jelly. I way overshot my old tolerances and totally wrecked my brain. I can’t even use my bathroom properly because I'm so dead paranoid about windows now.

And Ceaare somehow still gives the most ominous possible answer for each question XD

Conrad Veidt, Hans Heinrich von Twardowski and Werner Krauss in The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (Das Cabinet des Dr. Caligari, 1920).

Being the mentally unstable one in the family is wild to me because like, I had an improbably unproblematic childhood. Like, zero complaints. I got that all-natural, organic, cruelty-free free-range madness. I would make Freud puff his cheeks, throw up his hands and convince himself that I'm just a lying liar who lies. IDK either bro. It is what it is, my guy.

Nice argument let me discuss with my merry men on how to respond

Me when I stop taking my anti-sad pills and I'm sad

day 404 of drawing spamton every day until deltarune chapter 3

I really am my Grandpa's girl because I want a railroad spike for my desk SO BAD it won't even have a function it's just gonna be my pet railroad spike.

Regarding the whole mamamax debacle, one thing I haven't seen mentioned is what vainglorious braindead bullshit the whole "Leviathans are coming" signoff is.

So in the lore of this alleged cult, leviathans are members of a murderous anti-otherkin organization used to scare cult members and make them afraid of leaving. WHY ON EARTH would you try to reach out to and deprogram people inside said cult by referring to yourself and your following that way??? If the cult is real he would be playing right into the leader's hands by aligning himself with a fictional band of bigoted gangstalkers! If he really believes that there is a legitimate cult then he is a whole new level of incompetent.

personal injury lawyer billboards are all like INJURED?

Time for Lifehacks You Probably Already Know but I Didn't until Really Recently!!!

If you have a cold or whatever and you had to wipe your nose so much that your skin stings lotion won't help at all but lip balm 100% will so just go toddler mode with it and put chapstick all over your nostrils and above your lips that's sweet relief baybeeeeeeee