Why? Pt.1

Why? Pt.1

Hisoka x reader

Angst, hurt, a sprinkle of fluff. Hisoka tells you that he no longer loves you…

Your pov

Why? That’s the question I keep asking myself. Why did he go? What did I do? That night replays in my head like a broken record. It drains me and it makes me ill. He made so many promises to me. Promises I knew he wouldn’t keep, but I thought maybe I’d be different. Maybe I could be the one he could love. I have so much, but got nothing in return. Now he’s gone. Probably off with someone else saying the same things he said to me. Hisoka is a liar and a true heartbreaker. But I truly cannot see myself not loving him. It’s been three months since I’ve seen him or even heard anything from him. But what do I care? He’s the one that left. I can’t keep crying into my pillow at night wishing he was there. He’s never coming back and it’s time to move on. 

Truth is, moving on isn’t as easy as I wanted it to be. I’m currently working at the bakery I’ve worked at for years. Serving customers as I normally would. Putting on my pretty fake smile and voice so that no one can see my raging pain. He “loved” me more than anyone I had ever been with before. He showed me things that I would’ve never seen if it weren’t for him. My chest feels like a open would that will never heal no matter what I try. My boss, Kyo, is starting to notice how I drift off into my own thoughts. She never says anything, but I know she’s worried. She’s always been so caring. Kyo was the first person I went to after Hisoka left. I never told her what happened and she never asked. I appreciate that from her because I wish I didn’t have to constantly remember that night…

Three months ago…

I waited for him like I always did. Hisoka never stayed for more than a week at a time. Always saying he had work to do and how important it was. I never questioned him about it because I understood the importance of my own job.

I suddenly heard the front door open. Sitting up from the couch I greeted him with the same sweet smile I always gave him. Despite his absence, I still loved him. And I always had hope that once his job was done, we could go back to how we were before.

This time was different, he didn’t smile back. In fact he looked at me like I was a total stranger. He stood there with the door still open staring at me not saying a word. It’s was strange and I swear I got a chill down my spine from the intensity. My throat got dry and my anxiety was high. I knew something was wrong, but I never could imagine the words that wold come out of his mouth…

“I have no need for you any longer. You are far too weak for someone like me. You no longer interest me. Look at you. You’re a mess. You look like you’ve aged since I’ve been gone. Thankfully after tonight I will never have to lay a single eye on your pathetic self.” Hisoka said with laced with venom.

I froze. I couldn’t move. All those years of “I love you’s.” All those years of him saying I didn’t need to be strong that my love was strong enough. How beautiful I was to him. How he told me he cared for me. Now, all gone with a single paragraph of hurtful words.

“Why?” I whispered

“Like I said I have no use for you any longer.” Hisoka spoke

My heart shattered with his words. He meant it. He was telling the truth. This was as serious as I’ve ever heard him. My eyes poured and my body felt hot. Hisoka just stood there watching. Staring at my broken figure. Finally, after a few minutes, he turned around and walked out of my life forever…

Back to present…

Back out of my daze I finally noticed a customer staring at me with an uncomfortable expression on their face. I quickly apologized and received their order. As much as I want to move on and know I should. I still cannot get over him. But I will try because that’s all I can do. He’s gone and he’s never coming back. He never loved me, he only used me until he got bored of me. Never again will I allow anyone to treat me with such heartbreak.

But I still ask myself… “Why?”

*Third person pov*

What you didn’t know, was Hisoka was there. He was dressed in average street clothing. His hair was down and his makeup removed to show his rather pale but handsome complexion. He was peaking through the bakery window. Enough to see you, but not enough for you to see him. Watching you with a melancholy expression. He had been coming to that same spot every day since he broke your heart. He broke your heart because he was threatened and he wasn’t sure if he was strong enough to fight alone. No one knew the two of you were together, but it was only a matter of time. Hisoka regrets what he did. And if time allows and the threat is gone… he vowed to do everything to win back your heart and fix the shattered pieces. He never understood how you made him love you. All he can think of is your love and your passion and a single word that constantly swims in his mind… “Why?”

Thank you for reading ❤️

Part 1/ Part 2

*I do NOT own any characters except y/n*

Please feel feee to request, comment, and reblog

Click here to see what I’ll write for and HERE for my master list.

-L.W.L

Be Okay pt.2

Satoru Gojo x Reader

Angst, mentions of cheating

Gojo’s Pov

I miss her. Y/n has been distant recently and I have no idea why. I don’t understand what happened to our love. We use to make people jealous by how we were. She was my perfect escape from this death and corruption filled life. From my work as a sorcerer. But now that love seems dull and lifeless. However, this woman in front of me makes me forget about the love I once had. Even if just for a little while. Am I a bad person for cheating on my so called lover even when I’m not sure we are in love anymore?

I do love y/n and I always have and always will. I hope one day we can go back to how things were, so for now I’ll enjoy the time I have with the beautiful woman in front of me who’s name I still don’t know. I only met her days ago. Her incredible soft lips are intoxicating and taste like cherry. It’s feels go good being able to be with someone like this. Even though I wish it was y/n. I wish she would talk to me. I wish I could be taking her out like this. I wish I could pamper her and tell her how much I love her. I know I don’t deserve her especially after today, but she’s still mine and I know she’ll be there when I come back home. And that thought makes me feel warm despite the lack of love in our shared home.

I said goodbye to the woman who’s name I still don’t know and don’t care to know. Instead of getting a taxi, I decided to walk. I don’t really know what made me decide to walk home, but I just felt like I needed to clear my head a bit. My heart feels conflicted. I got what I wanted right? I got the affection I so desperately wanted? I got to be with someone who wanted my affection, right? So, why do I feel so shitty right now? Is it because deep down I know how fucked up I am right now? Is it because I know that if y/n ever found out that I’d never be able to love her the way I want to again?

My thoughts are interrupted by a car passing me. It looked oddly familiar, but I couldn’t remember who that car belonged to. Maybe y/n will know? When I got up to our shared apartment, I felt a sense of uneasiness. It felt wrong and I hoped that once I opened the door seeing her would cure me of that awful feeling.

To my shock, the lights were off and my lover was no were to be seen. While turning on the lights, I called out for her, but received no voice back. I was nervous and my mind was in a frenzy. I pulled out my phone and called her, but it immediately went to voicemail. At this point I was panicking. What if she was hurt? What if she got lost? My eyes trailed our apartment. Tears filled my eyes when I saw her necklace and a letter underneath it. Carefully I moved the necklace and picked up the letter.

Reading the letter, my heart sunk. I chest felt heavy and it felt hard to breathe. She had seen me with that woman. She saw my sinful actions. She knew what I had done to her. And now my greatest fear had come to pass. She is gone. My life, my greatest love and passion is gone. So many thoughts swam through my head. What have I done? Why did I fuck up so badly? Why? Why? Why?

I don’t know how long I cried for. I don’t know how long I was lying on the floor calling out for her. How badly I wish I could take it back and hold her and telling my lover everything perfect about her. I decided to get up after some more time. I went to the counter where the necklace is placed. I carefully picked it up and examined it. She wore it everyday. She wore it even when our love was at its weakest. Even when I was unfaithful to her she still wore it. I put on the precious item so I could keep it as close to me as possible. Holding the last piece of her as close to my heart as I can. With tears in my eyes I decided right then and there that I would stop at nothing to get my lover back so that we could be okay.

There is a third and final part to this. Thank you so much for reading and see you in the next part!❤️❤️

•I do NOT own any characters except y/n•

Please feel free to request, comment, and reblog

Click here to see what I’ll write for and HERE to for my master list.

-L.W.L

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

This Is What You’ve Gotta Do pt.1

Megumi x reader

Fluff, wholesome. Megumi has a crush on you and turns to his friend Itadori to figure out how to tell you. Megumi and Itadori are aged up in this fic.

Megumi pov

This is so annoying. I haven’t had a second to think for myself for nearly an hour now. My head hurts from the constant nagging and booming voice in the room. I want to leave, but that’s out of the question. Itadori found out a secret that I honestly thought I would bring to my very grave. It was super late at night when he barged it only to tell me something that shook my very core. He found out about my crush on l/n…

“ Come on man you gotta tell her!!!!!! Its Important that you do Fushiguro!!!!” Itadori exclaimed with stars in his eyes.

“Oh yeah and how so?” I said feeling a slight blush creep on my features.

“Because I think you guys would be so cute!!!!!”

“No” I deadpanned

“Awwww please you gotta tell her!”

“No”

“Please”

“No”

“PRETTY PLEASE!!!!!!!!” Itadori screaming to the point where I know the whole campus heard.

I looked up at my friend who looked like he was going to burst if I said no. God, so annoying. I don’t even know if she likes me at all. I mean she’s sweet and caring. Her eyes light up when she’s passionate about something. And my heart feels all fuzzy when I think about her smile. I’ve never felt this way before and to be honest I have no idea what to do. Or where to start. Maybe my idiot classmate is right?

“Fine, I’ll do it” I said reluctantly

“YESS!” Itadori screamed once again

“Stop yelling.” I deadpanned

“Okay okay okay”

“Look, I have no idea how to even confess to someone or if l/neven likes me at all.” Saying with a sad look upon my face.

“Ya know, the only reason I’m telling you to confess is because I overheard y/n and Nobara taking about their crushes. And guess who’s name she said…”Itadori said in full confidence.

“Who?”

“You” Itadori said with stars in his eyes

She likes me! What! This changes things. Maybe this could work between us. Being Jujutsu Sorcerers will be tricky, but it’s something that’s been done before. So maybe it’ll work for us. I began smiling. A smile that I hope soon I could show her.

“I’ll do it” I said with full confidence.

“YESS” Itadori exclaimed

“Alright Fushiguro. This is what you’ve gotta do…”

Thank you for reading ❤️

Please feel free to request, comment, and reblog

Click here to see what I’ll write for and HERE for my master list.

•I do NOT own any characters except y/n•

-L.W.L

Part 2

Bath Sex

Gojo Satoru x fem!Reader

18+

Smut, unprotected sex, bath sex

The aftermath of sex leads to aftercare, which leads to a steamy session of bath sex.

Strong arms wrap around me as warm water surround me. My back is on his and I can feel him breathe. This man makes me feel truly loved. Just minutes ago, he made love to me. It was passionate and filled with love. I’m sore for how rough he was with me. My pussy feels empty without his cock buried inside me. I’m glad the bath water is keeping me warm. My head still feels fuzzy from the moments before. Despite how tired my body is, I still desire his body. I desire his passion, his love, and his cock. I believe this man I am sharing this bath with is my drug. A drug that I never wish to stop overdosing on.

Satoru and I are silent. Allowing the water to surround our bodies and hold each other. His lips are slowly leaving trails of kisses on my neck. They leave my body shivering despite the warmth of the bath. My pussy tingles with pleasure and I feel myself desiring him once again. I can feel his length on my lower back telling me that he feels the same way that I do. The silence is broken when he speaks interrupting our blissful silence.

“I need you” he mumbles

“I need you too” I sigh with pleasure.

“Good” he spoke

His hands then trailed up my stomach and up to my boobs. He began massaging them slowly and rubbing his thumbs across my nipples. Which made my pussy throb even more. A soft moan escaped my lips and I heard his chuckle in response. He then began pinching them which caused a even louder moan to leave my lips. Still pinching one of my nipples, he took one of his hands and trailed down to my clit. He began circling my it slowly which drove me crazy. His name fell from my lips in sinful bliss. We stayed like this until I felt myself reaching my peak. I felt like I was about to overflow with pleasure and my release was near. Just as I was about to reach my climax, he moved his hand back onto my stomach and I whined with my denied pleasure.

“Not just yet. I’ll let you cum, but I need to feel you first, love. Sound good?” He whispered

“Yes” I spoke

“Yes what?” He spoke firmly with his hand resting on my neck.

“Yes sir” I responded

“Good girl. Now turn around and get on top of me” he demanded

I did as I was told and and startled his waist. I could see his cock on my stomach. I needed him inside me and I could see in his eyes that he was feeling the same. He put his hand on my neck and kisses my roughly. Our mouthed danced with each other. I felt his tongue move with mine. His other hand is placed on my ass. My body began rocking on bud trying to get some friction on my clit. He broke the kiss and looked in my eyes. His silver white hair stuck to his forehead. His eyes a beautiful blue and he has a lustful look in is eyes.

“Put it in love” he spoke

I nodded my head and gave him a kiss. I then grabbed his cock and lined it with my pussy. I began sinking myself on it. I felt a familiar stretch around my walls and I moaned with blissful pleasure. Satoru put his hand on my hips and began rocking me against him. I felt a burning sensation within me. My whole body erupted with pleasure and many moans escaped my mouth. He moved my hips faster and my body moved without hesitation. The water from the bath began spilling out of the tub. I got slightly worried but paid no mind as he moved his hips up himself now reaching deeper inside me.

“Such a good girl taking my cock. You love it don’t you.” Me moaned gritting his teeth

“Yes, fuck Satoru I love it” I moaned

“I love you sweet girl”

“I love you too”

“I know baby, I know. Are you gonna cum for me soon?” he asked

“Yes, please let me cum this time.” I begged while gripping his shoulders.

“It late, so I’ll let you cum.” He said.

“Thank you, love” I shuttered.

His cock was pounding furiously inside me and one of his hands was rubbing my pussy. I started to feel the bubbling sensation that I was denied moments ago. It was an overwhelming feeling of pleasure. I heard him moaning louder and I could tell he was near his release as well. Finally I met him sweet release. I gripped onto his shoulders moaning his name like a prayer from my lips. My body shook and I felt like I was on fire. My pussy clamped onto Satoru’s cock that was still pounding into me. About a minute later he moaned loudly and pulled my body onto his as I felt him release inside of me. His hand went into my cheek and he pulled me into a gentle kiss. Then I laid onto him and both of us were panting. We stayed like that for a moment until I heard him speak.

“The water is cold now, wanna get out?” He asked

“Yeah, I think it’s time for bed.” I responded

We got out of the shared bath and he grabbed my towel and began drying my body for me. It was a sweet gesture and he smiled as he began drying my body. He kept telling me how beautiful I was and how obsessed he was with me. After I was dry, I dried him in turn. He smiled down at me his eyes never leaving mine. His arms pulled me into a hug and I knew I was safe with him. After we separated, we did our skincare routines and made our way to bed. He held me as we were falling asleep. I was nearly there as I heard him speak one last time.

“I love you y/n” he said in a groggy yet love filled voice.

“I love you too Satoru” I replied smiling as I fell into a deep blissful sleep.

Thank you so much for reading. I hope you enjoyed this smut. I plan on writing more and more of this type of content. 💜

Please feel free to request, comment, and reblog

Click here to see what I’ll write for and click HERE for my master list.

•I do NOT own any characters except y/n•

-L.W.L

Why Do You Care Now?

Erwin Smith x fem!Reader

In which Erwin and reader get into an argument about the status of their relationship…

Angst, Erwin is an ass, fluff eventuality.

Your Pov

He doesn’t care about me. I was simply something that could satisfy his needs while he had spare time. He told me he loved me and that I was the reason he fought so hard for humanity. Now I know he told me sweet lies so I’d be caught in his trap. I was just a toy for Erwin Smith. This revelation makes me feel sick. I feel betrayed and yet I still love him. I truly do and I thought he did too, but it was all a lie. Every sweet word, every touch, every feeling was nothing more than a deception.

A few minutes earlier…

I walk into my lover’s office to deliver him reports. I also wanted to talk to him about our relationship and whether or not it would be okay if other people could know about us. I mean it doesn’t seem like a bad thing to ask about, right?

I knock on his door and hear him telling me to enter. I entered with a smile on my face. Seeing him always makes my heart fill with joy. Because this world is dangerous and death is around every corner, but being with Erwin makes me realize that it’s can also be beautiful. I set the reports on his desk as he send me a small smile.

“Hello Commander” I say

“Hello cadet” Erwin says with a serious expression.

“Here are the recent reports for you sir”

“Thank you cadet, that’ll be all”

“Actually sir, there is something I’d like to talk with you about.” I say nervously

“I have a minute to spare, so please” he says as he gestures to the seat in front of me.

“It’s about us. I was wondering if it would be okay if we could maybe tell people about our relationship? I mean we have been together for a while now, and I just though that it would be time to tell people.” I said with as much confidence as I could muster.

“Y/n I think you misunderstand what we are exactly.” Erwin says with a sigh

“Aren’t we together sir?” I question.

“No y/n you are simply someone that I have sexual relations with. You and I are nothing more that casual friends that have sex.” Erwin says while looking at me.

My heart drops at this sudden information and I’m confused on what he means.

“B-but Erwin you told me that you loved me. You do love me don’t you?” I say as tears start to form.

“I do not love you. I have never loved you. I only said that to you to satisfy your needs and to keep you around me. I’m far too busy for love. And even if I wasn’t, you’re not the person that I’d first choose. You’re a clingy annoying brat that is only good for sex. In fact I do not care what happens to you. If you were to die, then I would simply take it like everyone else that dies for this regiment.” He says with no ounce of remorse.

I sit there with tears now flowing out of my eyes. My entire heart feels like it’s been shattered. I can’t breathe. I thought he loved me? I’m nothing to him? He wouldn’t care if I died? This is not the same man I knew yesterday. The man I knew yesterday would have hugged me if I had asked. Or comforted me after a rough expedition. Or kissed me just because. The man I knew yesterday would tell me how important I was to him and how much he loved me. He would’ve told me that he would protect me and that he hoped one day we could live together and get married. That man I knew yesterday is no longer the man I see in front of me. This man is nothing but anger and he’s looking at me like I’m the most disgusting thing in this wretched world.

“Now Cadet if that’s all, you may take your leave” Erwin says coldly

I say nothing as I leave his office. For I cannot even speak. Hell, I can’t even think straight. Everything I had is now gone. He truly doesn’t care for me. My feelings for him don’t matter and neither does my life. Currently it feels as though I’m drowning in sadness unable to see the surface.

One month later during an expedition…

Beyond the walls is beautiful, it truly is. If it weren’t for the threat of titians, humanity would flourish out here. Currently the scouts are on an expedition. Our mission is to gather as much information as we can. This is set to be a several day expedition, but so far our losses exceed what we hoped. Yet the commander pushes us on with our mission.

At this point I don’t care if I live or die. This world is shit and the thing I loved most betrayed me. So now, I don’t believe I have a will to live. Erwin was the only thing I had. My parents were scouts and they both met their demise during an expedition just like this one. Maybe I’ll join them soon? Will anyone account my death if I were to die today? Will anyone care? Will he care?

My thoughts were interrupted my a large hand hovering over me. Before I could react, it grabbed me and began lifting me off my horse. I didn’t scream as it began crushing my bones. I didn’t cry as I saw it’s mouth opening and felt myself being pulled towards it. All I felt was relief. And for the first time in awhile, I feel happy. I’m going to die and that doesn’t scare me.

Suddenly I heard the sound of ODM gear. And the grip on my body loosened and I felt my body begin to fall. The fall was interrupted by someone grabbing me mid air. I felt dizzy and it felt like there was a blanket of blood covering my broken body. My eyes felt heavy and all I wanted to do was close my eyes. I’m so tired and I can’t feel my body. Before I closed my eyes I saw him. Erwin’s face is hovering over mine. Maybe I’m having one last hopeful imagination, but I think I see tears in his eyes. His mouth is moving, but I can’t hear any words coming out of his mouth. After a minute of looking at him I finally close my eyes and everything goes dark.

Erwin Pov

It’s been nearly a week since I saved y/n. She’s going to recover, but her body was bruised severely and several of her bones were broke. It’s a miracle that she was able to survive. The thought of her dying broke something in me. I know what I said to her. And if there were ever anything I were to regret, it would be the poison that I spoke to her on that day. Seeing her about to get eaten made me neglect my very duties as a commander. I broke formation to save her. Every logical thought I had was replaced with my desire to save her. I try being with her as much as I can, however my duties as a commander keep me away from her. I want to be there when she wakes up. I want to tell her that all I said to her on that day was nothing but lies. I want her to forgive me and love me the way that she use to. I want to tell her, hell, I need to tell her that I do indeed love her.

At first she was someone that I used to satisfy my needs. She was simply a means to an end. There was a time where the threat of her life would not have bothered me. But she slowly crept into my heart. She made me feel more passion that I thought was capable in this life. That scared me. I was scared of how she made me feel. In fear of losing her. But she’s alive and would have died if I didn’t save her.

Two Days Later…

I managed to get some spare time to see her today. Hange says that y/n should wake up soon. I’m hoping she does. I miss her and I’m desperate to tell her how I feel. She needs to hear what I have to say. I’m confident that she will forgive me if I just tell her. Right?

My thoughts are interrupted when I heard rustling next to me. I immediately went close to her just waiting for her to open her eyes. After a few more seconds, her eyes flutter open and my eyes meet with hers and I began to smile.

“Y/n, I’m so glad you’re awake. How are you feeling?” I asked her

“Erwin?” She whispered

“Don’t talk just yet let me get you some water. ” I say as I grab the glass of water by her bedside.

“Thanks” she say as she grabs the water from my hand and takes a small sip from it. After she’s done I take it from her and place it back on her bedside.

“Erwin, why are you here?” She questions

“Y/n, I’m here because I was worried about you. You nearly died, but I managed to save you from a titan. You’ve been asleep for little over a week now, but Hange says that you’ll make a full recovery.” I tell her

“Thank you for saving me Erwin, I truly appreciate that, but you didn’t answer my question”

“I’m here because I need to tell you that everything I said to you that say was a lie. I said those hurtful things to you because I was scared of telling anyone because I was scared. And y/n I am so sorry for what I said to you. And I hope that you can forgive me for what I’ve done to you. Y/n I love you and I want us to be together again. And this time I want us to be public with it. I’ll give you some time to think, but just know that I truly do want this with you.” I said to her sincerely hoping she would understand.

“Erwin, thank you for being honest with me. However I do not want to be with you.” She said

“Y/n you’re confused and you just woke up. Maybe give it a few days?” I said nervously

“Erwin I’m sorry but I cannot be with someone that said they wouldn’t care if I was dead. You lied to me and used me. Hell, I don’t even know if you’re telling me the truth. And why do you even care now?” Y/n said raising her voice.

“Y/n I am telling you the truth. So please give me this chance I will do better I promise”

“Please leave and don’t come and visit me again. I do not want to be with you. I will not allow myself to love you the way I use to. So please leave. You and I are nothing more than commander and cadet.” She says coldly.

“Y/n please.” I beg her

“Just go!”

I do as she says and I leave the room. I’ve lost her. If I had only showed her that I cared for her then, none of this would’ve happened. But at the same time I felt that my apology was good. She’s just not thinking rationally, so perhaps she’ll come back to me soon. That’s my hope anyway.

One Year Later

Your pov

My body took months to heal and because of how badly I was injured, I permanently have a slight limp in my leg. It stops me from being as efficient as I use to be, but I manage. I am no longer bothered by Erwin Smith. He was persistent about us being together again for months after I woke up. But now he’s ceased his actions and our relationship is strictly professional. He did promise me that I would be the only woman he’d ever love. And how he regrets his actions. I feel bad for him, but I’ve moved on and I’m much happier with my life.

I also found new love in someone that I trust. He’s a very strong soldier with a passion to help humanity. I admire and love him. He’s loyal and with him I never question whether or not he loves me or not. I’m so happy that we fell for each other. And we’re even public with our relationship. When I asked him he didn’t hesitate to say yes to the idea. His name is Mike Zacharias. He helped me get promoted to squad leader and I have yet to lose anyone. I feel accomplished with what I have done and who I have become. This world is dangerous, but now I have the passion to fight for my future.

•I do NOT own any characters except y/n•

Thank you for reading ❤️

Please feel free to request, comment, and reblog

Click here to see what I’ll write for and click HERE for my master list.

-L.W.L



Why? Pt. 2

Hisoka x reader

Hurt, comfort, fluff. Hisoka and you talk about your past relationship.

It’s been four months now since Hisoka broke my heart. My daydreaming has started to slow down and I no longer cry over that man. He’s gone and now I’ve truly come to terms with it. I miss him, but I need to move on. I’m worth more than what he told me I was. I’m strong and I need to remember that. My boss, Kyo, has been nagging me to go out with my co worker Yuji. He’s a sweet man and very considerate, but I think I’m going to focus on myself for awhile. I need to know myself and who I am.

Six months later…

Now it’s been ten months since Hisoka broke my heart. And I can definitely say I’ve completely moved on. My heart is healed and I’ve been able to focus on myself. Last month I moved into a new apartment in a safer part of the city and much closer to the bakery. Moving was so therapeutic for me and peaceful. I haven’t felt that kind of peace in a very long time.

However, I couldn’t help this nagging feeling that I was being watched by someone. I wore it off as me being a little nervous about living in a new place. I checked everywhere and even got a camera to put in my house just in case and fought nothing. So I wore that feeling off as nerves. I’m safe and men like Hisoka won’t hurt me again. But deep down I still feel love for him. Even after all of this time. All I can ask myself is… why?

Two months later…

Third person pov

It has been a full year since Hisoka had left you. A full year since he heard you laugh. A fully year since he felt your touch. A full year since he felt your love. A full year since he broke your heart. He had already taken care of the threat at hand. They are gone and dead. He made sure of that. He even buried them so deep in the ground that if they were dead, they would suffocate before they reached the surface.

That was three months ago. So why hasn’t he come back to you? The threat was gone. And Hisoka still loved you with a fiery passion. Maybe it was because he was scared? Maybe he couldn’t find the words? Maybe he didn’t feel deserving? He didn’t know. What he did know what that he really did love you. Hell, he needed you. And Hisoka has never needed anyone in his life. He’s independent and gets what he wants and who he wants. But he wants you. He’s never truly wanted something more in his life. And he know that if he doesn’t have and love you again then life for him will never be enjoyable again.

Watching you from a safe distance, he saw the way you were smiling at the customers. How sweet you were and he felt jealousy. He knew that if he hadn’t have broken you as he did, you would be in his arms this very second giving him that same enchanting smile.

He then noticed your co worker, Yuji. How he smiled at you. How he looked at you. And Hisoka hated it. He noticed how you smiled at him. And he hated it. His bloodlust began to leak. He couldn’t stop his bubbling rage within him. He couldn’t handle this Tortured any longer. He finally made a decision. To get you back no matter what.

First person pov

I felt a chill run down my spine. It was a familiar chill that only belonged to one person. But I thought that was impossible. He’s gone. And he’s not coming back. He told me that I wasn’t useful to him. That he was bored of me. So why would he be here? The door to the bakery suddenly opened. I turned my head as I normally would and to my despair… there he stood. The man I thought I would never see again… Hisoka Morrow was standing right in front of me.

I froze. He looked the same as he did a year ago. Except he wasn’t wearing his normal outfit. He was sporting a sweatshirt and a pair of black jeans. He hair was down and his make up was removed showing his beautiful pale features. God, I almost forgot how handsome he was. How his piercing golden eyes felt looking in to mine. How sharp his jawline was. How plump his lips were. How soft his skin looked. Hisoka Morrow truly is the most handsome man I’ve ever seen.

I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt his hand touch my cheek and wipe my tear away. I have no idea why, but I let him do it. I missed this feeling. I missed touch. And God his smell. A mixture of fruit and sandalwood. I realized right then and there that no matter what, I would always love him.

Finally I came to my senses. This was the man that shattered my heart and left me to suffer. This was the man that called me useless. This was the man that lied to me for years. Why on earth would I allow him to touch me in the way. He doesn’t get to do that anymore. With that thought, I smacked his hand away and scolded him.

“What the hell are you doing here Hisoka!” I spat

“Flower, I am here to apologize. I’m so sorry for what I did to you. For how I hurt you-“

“I really don’t care how you feel now.” I interrupted.

“You can’t just waltz in here and expect me to forgive you for what you have done. Please go away. I’m working and I don’t have time for you”

“Flower I-“ Hisoka tried to say

“Don’t call me that”

Hisoka took a deep breath. 

“Y/n, please can we at least take this somewhere else. Please I need to tell you this. Even if you don’t forgive me I just need you to know how I truly feel.”

I shouldn’t have have said no, but I felt compelled to say yes. I told Kyo that I needed to take my break early. She was hesitant but understood the importance of the situation at hand. Hisoka and I went to the nearby park. The walk was silent, but somehow not uncomfortable. After five minutes we were at a more secluded place at the park. It was almost romantic and felt like a place he would’ve taken me if the situation was much different.

“Y/n” Hisoka said breaking the silence

“Hisoka” I said in almost a whisper.

Hisoka turned to me and my breath fought in my throat because I saw something that I never knew I would ever see. Hisoka was crying. His eyes were puffy and he had some dried tears on his face.

“Y/n, I am so sorry for the pain I have caused you. I don’t know the extent of it, but I know you were hurt because of my actions. I know I’m not the best man in the world, but I made you a promise and I broke that promise. I’m not trying to condone my actions, but I was threatened. The threat is gone now and honestly they were easier to dispose of than I thought.” Hisoka said laced with pain and sorrow.

“Hisoka why didn’t you tell me any of this? Why, why weren’t you honest with me?” I said eagerly.

“ Because I couldn’t lose you!” Hisoka exclaimed.

“My flower you are the most important thing I have ever had and I truly love you.” Hisoka said as he moved closer to me with tears in both our eyes.

“I said those awful things to try and protect you. I thought that if I had hurt you, that you would forget about me. You would realize how bad I was and find someone you could love. Someone that you would never have to feel unsafe with. I just wanted to protect you and I thought that by me leaving, you would be safe”

“You’re such an idiot Hiso! I love you. I always have. I’ve spent the last year trying to forget about you. I’ve worked on my mental health and did things more for myself. I did do some healing in the process, but you were still on my mind. I couldn’t get you out no matter what I tried.” I said as I reached out and held his face lovingly. 

Hisoka had a shocked expression on his face that was also filled with love.

“Please will you give me another chance to fix the wrongs I have made. I promise that I will never hurt you as I have again. My heart tore knowing what I did to you. And I have always regretted losing you my flower. You don’t have to say anything now, but please consider it.” Hisoka pleated.

“You hurt me so much Hisoka I need some time to think things over.”

“I understand flower I will give you as much time as you need.” Hisoka said lovingly.

One week later…

Maybe I’m stupid or maybe I’ve just made the best decision of my life. But I can’t help the way I feel for him. Knowing what he did out of love for me makes me rethink this past year. I will insist on taking things slow, but I simply cannot stop loving him.

Reaching for my phone, I texted him and asked him to meet at the park like we did a week ago. He responded within a minute and agreed. I was nervous about this. Overthinking about how bad all of this could go again. But I just can’t help my feelings. After a ten minute walk I finally made it to the park where I saw Hisoka standing in the same spot we were in a week ago.

“Hisoka”

Hisoka turned to me and looked at me with an expression full of love. One that I haven’t seen in a long time.

“Flower” he said

“I’ve made my decision.” I said with full confidence.

“I will give you a second chance because I simply cannot help my feelings for you. This might be the dumbest thing I could do, but I’m willing to take that chance. With that said I wanna take things a little slow with you. And build up our relationship again.”

“Thank you, thank you for giving me this chance, flower” Hisoka beamed.

Suddenly he came up to me and embraced me. God, it felt like I was home again. I always did feel so safe in his arms. Breathing him in. Feeling his warmth. I felt so happy in that moment. And honestly I didn’t want to let go. I knew that Hisoka didn’t want to either based on how tight he was hugging me. Everything felt good again. Everything felt truly peaceful. And now I feel as thought I won’t need to ever ask…

Why?

Thank you so much for reading ❤️

•I do NOT own any characters except y/n•

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-L.W.L

Part 1 / Part 2