Am I Enough PT 8

Am I Enough PT 8

Summary: A successful return. Now how will they handle being confronted daily with their fears?

Warnings: Bringing back the angst!

A/N: Don’t hate me too much. Also not as long as it usually is. I apologize for the delay. I got super busy. Thoughts and comments always welcome.

“This whole situation is toxic. How can you, for one moment, even think of doing something like this? What started this in the first place? No, never mind I don’t want to know. Don’t tell me. I might do something unforgivable.”

Y/N POV

One would think after such a great reunion with everyone, you would be ok living in the same vicinity as Bucky. You pulled it off so well, something must have happened at movie night. For days you would catch your friends giving you side eyes, checking to see if you were ok, how you slept even. There was this undertone, something you couldn’t quite put your finger on buying it was there. You’d figure it out eventually.

Being as you were back in the city you called up your boss letting her know all had been resolved. She was brief with you, never really staying on topic as you talked. By the end, she told you they had replaced you and you would have to find other employment. She was soooo sorry, as she put it. The temp they hired just worked out a little too well. This left you without a job and without a home for the foreseeable future.

For once you buried your pride and approached Tony, he could help. You went to his workshop, knocking but knowing nothing could be heard over his rock. You slide the door open and stepped in. He was wearing a white tank top and covered in grease. He jammed around the place throwing holograms from place to place. Just watching made you dizzy and confused.

Finally, the song ended, “Hey, Tony.” You raised your voice to ensure he heard as the next song belted out of the speakers.

“Ah, munchkin. What brings you to my lair?”

“I..” You swallow, just say it, you reprimanded yourself. “I need your help. You see I lost my job and I really have no idea what to do now.”

“Well, you’ve come to the right place! I have plenty to offer you, even if you want to try something out first. Just know you don’t have to work to stay here. Even if you need shopping money I’m here.” He had grabbed your shoulders, shaking you to emphasize how serious he was.

“Alright, let me know. I think I’ll take some time off first. I haven’t had real downtime in forever.”

“Perfect, I’ll have FRIDAY send you potentials let her know which you like.”

You gave him a quick hug and skipped away. You were coming down the hall toward the living room when you turned the corner. This landed you face to face with a certain redhead. You both froze staring at each other. Besides dinner that night you hadn’t seen her, she was good at what she does but here she was. You stared at her taking her in., her cheeks hollow, her eyes had bags so deep in color it looked almost painted on, even her hair that flaming red seemed dull hanging limply around her face.

Sadness sweeps over you again, she looked so small now. This person was a complete opposite of what you had grown to know. It was then that anger, courses through. She should be suffering, how could she not? What she did to you, she deserved it. You shudder this wasn’t like you, this strong hate. She was your friend at one point, she shouldn’t be wasting away like this. It was still there though the anger, the pain.

Nat saw the shudder and the residual anger on your face. Taking a step back from you, she assessed the situation trying to find the quickest way out. She tilted to make her retreat when she paused.

“(Y/N), I… I can’t… I’m sorry. It should have never happened and I know you may never be able to forgive me but I am truly sorry.” She hiccups eyes filled with tears. For the moment you let the anger take over.

“It still happened, you let it happen. You choose this, you went behind my back and slept with my boyfriend. I told you everything about him and us. All the problems, the tears, and struggles. Everything! So no I can’t forgive you and a part never wants to. You lied to my face multiple times went behind my back. Heck, you're probably still sleeping with him still. But I get, you one, you got the guy. Just don’t expect me to be happy for you either.”

You were yelling at her by the end. Trying to show her just a glimpse of the pain you felt and the anger. “We aren’t together, we broke it off I can’t even look at him. Knowing what I did to you. Please, we want to make it better, I promise nothing is going on between us.”

“Your promises mean nothing to me now. I don’t think you fully know how much it hurt to not only lose both my best friend but to find I lost my boyfriend to her. I lost everything now because you two decided to go behind my back and pretend that what we had was real.”

You were so confused, she had gotten what she wanted. Bucky was her’ s and as far as you were concerned she could have him. Then why did you want to believe her? No, crave to believe it.

“I can’t do this with you any more Nat, just leave me alone.” With that, you shoved passed her.

You were fuming when you walked into the main room as your luck would have there sat Bucky at the kitchen counter. You almost went back the way you came, only you saw Nat still down the hall. You were quite literally between a rock and a hard place. You sigh and resign yourself to your fate of having two not needed conversations.

You head to the fridge pulling it open. Bucky’s head jerks up and stares at you rummaging through the food.

“Oh, hey (Y/N), I.. um.” You ignore him it clear he had heard your conversation with Nat. You tense, but you are actually kind of glad. He knew how you felt now, where he stood with you. Maybe he wouldn’t try anything now. It wasn’t meant to be as he clears his throat.

“You know what she said is true we haven’t done anything since you left. We are barely able to stay in the same room now.”

You bang the fridge door closed, your appetite now gone. “I don’t care Bucky, I’m sure you heard and I’ll repeat you won. You got what you wanted, nothing is holding you back from her. I don’t want to talk to you anymore either.”

“I need to talk to you though. I messed up, but I want to fix it. Please, I’ll do anything, just tell me what to do, doll.”

“Don’t call me that, I’m no longer your doll. Based on how this conversation is going I won’t be your doll ever again.” The name that once made butterflies erupt now left a foul taste in your mouth. You spin and march out of the room, huffing. You weren’t going to entertain them, they can’t just walk back in expect everything to go back. All because they finally understood how much pain they had caused. How much of a ‘mistake’ they had made.

You needed a distraction and fast, so you turned to the one person that had done so so far.

Bucky POV

She practically ran away from him. He drops his head into his hands. Why was this so hard? He opened up to her, admitted he was wrong. Sam was right, as much as he hated to admit it, this was going to be the hardest thing he was going to do.

Steve walked in to see his friends head laid low. He can up behind him clapping him on the back.

“Hey man, everything alright?” He takes a seat next to him.

“No, everything is not alright, I don’t know what to do Steve. She was just here, I apologized to her but she said it meant nothing.” He could wrap his head around it all. This wasn’t like her, this wasn’t in any way like (Y/N). She was the most caring, selfless person, no matter what happened she was always there for him. No, that she wasn’t he didn’t know what to do about it anymore.

“Bucky, I know it may seem helpless right now, but see it from her point of view. She has lost everything that she holds dear. She can’t just trust you again because you say you’re sorry. How many times did you lie to her? Go behind her back? I’m not saying you won’t ever be forgiving, but it will take time a lot of time. She has to learn to trust you again. I know Sam told you this but this is work and it’s hard, but I know you can do it. I’ll be here to help.”

Bucky blinked at him, after everything that he had done, no one would blame Steve for not trusting him. He wrapped his arms around Steve pulling him in close.

“Thank you, for believing me. You didn’t have to but you do.” He had tears on his face. Not letting Steve go.

“You were stupid but I know you can do better and will. This is your last chance, jerk I can’t help you if you screw it up again.”

“Punk, I’m not letting her go ever again.” They pounded the others back and let go.

“Don’t push Bucky, let her come to you that’s the only way this is ever going to work.” He nods and wipes his tears before anyone could see.

“Ok, I can do that. I need…. I need to talk to Sam. He has ideas, I’m sure he can help me.”

“He can, this is going to work out I promise. I like what you did with the dinner, I think she liked it too.”

Again Bucky nods. Leaving Steve he goes to find Sam. He just needs to talk get this all off his chest. He had kept up talking to Sam but instead of over the phone now it was just in person. Having come to rely on it, it was a little harder with (Y/N) around though. It seemed like Sam and she were attached at the hip. One could hardly find one without the other, whispering between each other and laughing at private jokes between them. They seemed to be getting awfully close.

FRIDAY informed him of Sams location in the gym. Moving quickly he headed down. Just as he was reaching the door though he heard voices.

“Sam, thanks for always helping me.” Bucky knows that voice, it’s (Y/N). He stops trying to listen in through the closed door.

They must have retreated farther into the room and with Tony’s impressive sound blocking all the rest of the conversation. He crept closer trying to see in without being seen. The only perk of his Winter training, observing without being seen.

What he saw though made his heart stop. There they were standing close to each other, not an inch between them, suddenly he sees Sam’s hand come up and cradle the back of her neck. He tilts his head and their lips collide.

Bucky jerks away. He’s lost her and he’s lost her to the man that said he was going to help him.

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Am I Enough PT 7

Bucky X Reader

Summary: A fire brings the group back together. How will things play out with Bucky and will his feelings hold strong?

Warnings: Fluff, overstimulated avengers, little angst.

A/N: SUPRISE!! I finished it early. This is a little long so beware. Also, I hope it isn’t repetitive I wanted to display both sides of the story, so let me know if it worked.

“You’re a jerk you know that? You make me feel all these things for you and then rip it away from me. Tell me, did you enjoy it? Enjoy leading me on, was it some sick game to you two? ‘Oh look, let’s see how long I can string her along before she realizes it all means nothing.’ Well, I’m happy I could entertain you. Gah, I was so stupid for believing any of it. I can barely look at you now.”

Bucky POV

After the call came in he started to freak out a little. She was coming back, how was he supposed to act. He knew he had to prove himself to the others and her but… but what? Did he go meet her at the hanger? Should he try to apologize? Maybe he should just stay out of the way?

He decided that staying away would be best, when the next call came, announcing she was about to land, everyone practically ran to the elevator. Each trying to be the first to see her. He stayed back, he had decided maybe the subtle way, was the best way. So dinner for the group it was. Pulling out the necessary equipment he got to work. Choosing what to make was relatively easy, he remembered always catch a small smile and an obvious twinkle in (Y/N)’s eyes when people announced pasta for dinner. She had a weakness for warm bread and (Y/F/S).

He had just put the water on when he heard the clamor from the living room, all of them practically tumbling out the elevator, one talking over the others. They craved her attention, she had a goofy smile on her face as they each tried to one-up the other with their stories. Suddenly she glances over, eyes connecting with his. She pauses in her step, briefly taking him in. Man, he wants to go over there to hug her but before he can, she simply sends him a small nod before proceeding to the couch with the others.

He blinks what had just happened, there was no way she should be acknowledging his presence. He thought she wouldn’t even want to see him, ignore he even existed. Feeling his blood begin to boil he pauses dinner, maybe she wasn’t as upset about the breakup. She had made it seem like it was this big deal this irreparable harm to her and she was smiling at him.

Wait no, he shakes his head, she has to be putting up a front. Trying not to ruin her reunion with her friends. He sighs to himself, how can he believe she didn’t care anymore? Why was he so angry right now? She just got back he was trying to fix all of this. Focusing back on dinner he didn’t hear Sam walk into the kitchen.

“What’s going through that head of yours?” Sam asks leaning against one of the counters arms folded.

“Too much.” Bucky is surprised by how open he is with Sam nowadays. Usually, he would go to his automatic reply, nothing. He turns to Sam studying him, what was it that made him open up to this guy so easily.

“What I got something on my face?” He runs his hands over it trying to wipe away whatever was there. Bucky simply shakes his head. “We can talk about it later if you want? I was just seeing if I could help you with dinner.”

He has a knowing grin on his face. Revealing that he knew exactly why Bucky was doing all of this. He nods and directs him to the bread, garlic bread was high on her list of favorites. They work in silent tandem, each knowing what the other was doing and moving on to the next task without asking. Every once in a while Bucky would look up, making sure she was still there, fearing she changed her mind and fled once more. He couldn’t help the pause in his actions at moments when she would let out a laugh, one that practically split her face. They listened to the team continue to yammer away, it made both of them smile knowing how much (Y/N) was loved here in the group.

With the table set up and dinner is placed on the table, everyone files in. There is a brief scuffle on who is sitting next to (Y/N) and across from her. Everyone eventually gets settled except Sam, Bucky, and Nat. Bucky brings the last of the food placing the bread directly in front of her. While he is leaning over (Y/N), Nat shuffles in, both of them tense taking the other in. Nat drops her head and took a seat as far away for her as she could.

There was a moment of silence before, “Dibs!!” Sam shouted grabbing the pasta. The rest dived in filling their plates. Bucky couldn’t help but take in the group. This is how it should be, what it always should have been. A family together, enjoying a meal. The meal continues, no one acknowledges the underlining tension between the team members.

After wrapping up they decide to reconvene in the living room for a movie night. They went to their separate quarters to get pajamas, blankets, and pillows. Bucky retreated, quickly changing and grabbing his favorite blanket, (Y/N) had picked it out of course but he had grown even more attached to it of late.

Swinging out of his door, he ran smack into someone. They bounced off and he instinctively reached out pulling them against him to steady them both. He looked down, he was met with (Y/E/C) eyes. It wasn’t just anyone it was (Y/N).

Y/N POV

The flight had been quick, you didn’t have much left after the fire was put out. The whole ride had you twitching though. The closer you got the more the twitch became more prominent. Sam at one point reached over and started to stroke your hand holding it still.

When you got off the plane you were bombarded with people and hugs. Each trying to squeeze there way into your arms. Man, you had missed them. You hadn’t quite realized how much until they were here. You were home. They pulled you toward the elevator, not wanting to be left out they all crammed in. When you exited, you were laughing at a story the Thor had just told. You cracked up, he had such a never could quite grasp Earth’s ways. As you looked up to take in the place you are met with those steel blue eyes. You freeze. Not ready, not ready, NOT READY. You were here though.

‘Focus, don’t let him see the pain (Y/N)’ you pep talked your self. You shoot him a small smile. ‘Nailed It’ you give yourself a mental fist bump. You could do this.

Your friend continues to fight for your attention all the way until dinner is called. They even fought over who was sitting closest to you. As they settled the final few struggled in that when you saw her. She was pale and her hair stood out even more against her. Her eyes were rimmed in red and the bags beneath her eyes suggested she hadn’t been sleeping well at all. You felt a twinge of sadness, you had never seen her like this. She was the strong one of the group. Heck, she had gotten what, no who she wanted. She drops her eyes and sits.

It was the perfect meal back. You knew Bucky had made it with you in mind. You had caught a few of the looks he sent you while preparing the meal. Drenching your pasta in the sauce. The bread almost made you moan, there was a slight eye flutter at the first bite.

When the meal was done and the movie night called you waited for the room to clear. You pulled Sam back, “I don’t know if I can do this.” You whispered to him, pulling on his arm as you tried to pull yourself together. “I don’t know how to act, how do I not fall apart while he is in the room?”

Sam chuckles shaking his head at you, “I think you're doing just fine if anything I should be asking you how you are managing it. You pulled off being ok better than anyone I have ever seen. As for now, Bucky is trying to make amends just keep that in mind alright?” You nod before turning toward your room.

You speed up not wanting anyone to wait on you. Not paying attention you run straight into a brick wall or so it felt like. When the walls arms came and wrapped around you gripping you close your eyes shot up meeting his. Well, crap!

“You alright?” He says after a moment of you two taking each other in. For some reason, you can’t take your eyes off each other. He searches your face looking for answers and reactions to the situation.

You give a small nod, “Yeah, sorry about that. Too excited for the movie night.”

“Oh yeah been a while since we had one. I just hope it’s a better movie than last time.”

“Hey! Volcanos in New York wasn’t that bad. It could happen here.” You have the smile on your face now remember that last movie. Cheesy to the extreme.

You both chuckle at the memory. You can't help but take in his face and the joy on it. You missed it. As soon as that thought ran through your head, you both realize what is happening and an awkwardness settles over you. You clear your throat and step away.

“I…I better get going before they send a search squad.” He only dips his head in acknowledgment. Turning your head away from him. “Oh and Bucky?” You swing your head back, he hadn’t moved just lifted his head up to look at you. “Thank you for dinner it was perfect.” You jog away. Leaving a very confused and shaken Bucky in your wake.

You enter the living room to find everyone present surprisingly. You find Sam on the love seat and almost by automatic response plop down next to him swinging your legs over his. He starts to rub your calves while you get comfy. You start to converse with Sam chatting and laughing when you noticed an odd silence about you.

You turn to the group, they all had eyes on the two of you. You cock your head to the side, asking a silent question of what’s going on.

“Aren’t you two lovebirds getting cozy.” Tony wiggled his eyebrows at you and you start to blush. Sam lets out a laugh. He pulls your legs into him.

“She’s mine now, shouldn’t have left me all alone with her. But really I just like these legs. So pretty, so soft. My precious.” He strokes your leg whole channeling his inner Smegal. There are snickers throughout. “Nah, nothing going on here, we just got used to our late night talks is all.”

The group nods, “So what are we watching?” You ask to get the subject off of you.

“I think, you should pick, but since it is you it will be (Y/F/M).” You nod. Gotcha there, you tend to be predictable when it came to movies. The movie begins and the room goes quiet. Even if it was your favorite, you feel your eyes grow heavy. Soon you're nodding off snuggling even closer to Sam. No one noticed until the whispers started. You shifted in your seat, settling for the moment. A couple minutes later you do it again but with tears dropping down. Sam quickly gathers you up, pulling you in close to him.

“Ahhh, shh I gotcha baby girl, calm down it’s just a dream.” He’s running his hands along your back and legs, gripping you close. After a moment you go limp and slumber again.

He casts his eyes up taking in the team. The heartbreak is evident, a few guilty, some for witnessing it others being the cause of it. “Hey everyone relaxes, it happens. We all get them. She doesn’t have as many now but they pop up. We are working on them. Right now she just needs support and not too many questions.”

The group nods. Seeing their affirmation he stands up with you taking you to your room. He tucks you in and smoothes your hair back. You would be ok. You were strong and so freaking stubborn. Either way, you would make it and he would be there to help.

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I'll Be Here Part 2

Steve X Reader

Warnings: angst and little fluff, super long because I can’t help myself

A/N: So this thing here is going to have 3 parts I believe and as stated this us part 2.I have learned not to rush posting something especially when I'm tired. Thank you again so much for reading these it is a great confidence booster and I am really enjoying myself. As always feedback is appreciated. Oh and thank you to my very first asked to be tagged person @veronicalei Part 1 has been updated.

Summary: After splitting up with Steve to let him get away with Bucky you are captured and with it comes to some consequences you didn’t expect to face. Will you ever escape your prison?

They had swarmed the building, guns pointed and threats made you paralyzed some putting up no real fight because at the end of the day you had done your crime and now you had to pay for it. This would keep everyone safe as well, and not just from Secretary Ross but from yourself as well. 

When they had surrounded you, you put your hands up behind your head and sunk to your knees letting them approach you. It didn’t really help because they still threw you to the ground and forcibly cuffed you. When you were subdued they call him in. He stalked towards you a smug grin on his face as he looked down upon you. 

“Oh, I’m going to get such pleasure from putting you away in the little hidey hole that I have planned. You will never see the light of day again.” He was practically cackling at the thought. 

You don’t speak merely stare at him, unnerving him with you uninterested glare. He could do his worse, there wasn’t exactly anything out here to come back to anyway. While they loaded you into an armored truck you glanced around one last time. Hoping that maybe Steve or someone had stuck around to see you carted off. That he would know to come to rescue you, but why would he when you specifically told Sam not to let him.

The doors shut with a bang they have surrounded you with four guards even though you have no intention of going anywhere, not that they knew that but still. After about 10 minutes into your journey, the guard on your left suddenly shifts, taking his baton out and striking you hard in the stomach. You told in half with the pain.

“That was for Mac, you crazy animal.” He hisses. The others have drawn closet as well, each of them taking their hits but never where you couldn’t cover it up. You guess this wi be a normal thing now, you draw into yourself hoping the pain will lessen but they continue each strike causing more pain. Your grunts and whimpers are the only vocal sound in the truck. Finally, the trucks slow to a stop, the guards all sit back with grins on their faces while you attempt to straighten yourself gulping in as much air as you can.

The doors swing open and the first two get out, they escort you to a nearby jet and you all are soon on your way out over the sea. Ross’s voice can be heard talking to the guards, “I know you were upset, but couldn’t you have waited till we were on the Raft to do this? I want him to see her original state and then do whatever else he has planned.“ 

You shudder half from the pain, half the thought of what this person could possibly have planned. They leave you alone for the remainder of the trip, this being a few hours. Upon landing they cart you out dragging you inside a large hanger. You can see several runs of water coming down from the ceiling it was either raining or you were in a submersible you decide. Not good if it was the later. You are quickly escorted and handed over to another set of guards who proceed to file you through a check-in process. They strip you of everything you own, your clothes are gone and replaced with a hospital gown. Weapons and everything else confiscated. Instead, they hand you another set of standard inmate uniform.

They then lead you to the next station where a collar is fitted around your neck. They then explain that this was for special inmates like yourself and whenever you did something out of line they would emit an electric pulse through you. They then added that they also did it when just looking at you pissed them off, like right now. They hit the switch and you spasmed falling to your knees as it courses through you. They all had a good laugh at your expense. 

You took too long getting up so they hooked their arms under yours and lifted you to what seemed to be a doctor’s office. The doctor tapped on his pad pulling up a new patient file with your name on it. He read over the slim notes before getting to work inputting your data. Blood samples were taken and you were escorted to your new cell, your home for the next eternity as they put it. 

You curled in the bed and shut the world out. This was you state for the next couple days, you never really moved you certainly never are or drank anything just laid there.

You cell opened and two guards came in forcing you up. You were still pretty sore from your last encounter so again they drag you back to the doctor’s office. You were laid down on a bed your hands and feet then strapped down. You start to panic unsure of what will happen next. The doctor walks up with a small tray of instruments, most of them being needles of various sizes.

"Welcome Miss (Y/L/N), my name is Dr. Krieger, we are going to try to cure you then we may be able to release you to a normal facility. But for now your my guest for a while. I have to say you have the most interesting blood I’ve seen in a while. Oh, what you must have gone through to get this.” He chuckles darkly while moving around you. “Well, no matter let’s get started.” He claps his hand and reaches for the first syringe. “We are going to try and cure each individual toxin and see how that goes.”

He takes the first and injects it into you. It feels like fire burning through your veins. It spreads through your body causing you to spasm and groan at the pain. “Interesting.” You hear him mutter. This goes on for a long time, how long you’re not sure, he continues with the same one injecting it every few hours you would say.

After an eternity, he takes one more sample of blood and dismisses you from the room. You are carried to your cell and locked in. This goes one for a couple days, the same routine hours of pain and back to your cell. The doctor has made note of the changes in you, your skin has a blueish tint, your eyes are still purple but a yellow-grey fog now surrounds them. The “cures” aren’t doing anything at all, in fact, they seem to be killing you instead. 

On day three, about halfway through you are dismissed by the doctor to go welcome some guests. Taken back you are propped up against the wall nearest the glass door. Once you are sealed inside, the main door opens and Sam, Wanda, Clint, and a man you’ve come to know as Scott, are marched in with Secretary Ross leading them.

“Look who’s here to see you!” He exclaims to you waving his arm back motioning to the others. “I’ve almost got the complete set. Though now from the looks of you I might be down one soon. I will have to speak to the doctor. Not so high and mighty now are we.” He sneers at you and lets everyone see you. 

They all gasp, you didn’t know what you looked like but from the response, it must not have been good. You can’t even raise your hand you are so weak. Wanda tears up, even though she is the one with a collar like you and a straight jacket. 

You hear Sam whisper “No” then he and Clint lunges forward toward Ross, the guards hold them back. “This, this is your great plan to lock us up for not doing what you say. To torture us till we comply. You’re no better than Hydra. Heck, I would take them over you any day." 

"Well lucky for you, you’re stuck with me for a very long time.” Ross snickers and turns away heading out the door. 

“You won’t get away with this. He will come and everyone will know what you really are.”

Ross simply waves a hand at Sam, the door closes. Each person is escorted and locked into their cages. Sam presses himself against the glass trying to get a better look at you. You head had fallen down now leaning against the door.

“Hey, (Y/N) Look at me. What did they do? What did these freaks do to you?”

You couldn’t reply as much as you wanted to. The guards eventually came back and took you to Dr. Keigal to complete your session with him. Not that it had ever gone right, but this time something really went wrong with the treatment, you had just gotten back when you started to convulse on the bed. Sam screams your name and calls for the guards. By the time anyone got there it had died out but a small trail of blood could be seen from the corner of your mouth. The guards called Dr. Kreiger, he determined nothing could be done gave you a mild sedative and left. 

Falling into an uneasy slumber, you had no real control over your body. While you were out you started to mumble, “I’ll be here, I will be here.”

You had always said this to Steve, no one really knows why but you did and now that Steve wasn’t here it broke their hearts, you were calling for him. Sam signed he couldn’t look at you without feeling the tears build up. Clint laid down looking at the ceiling trying to control his rage. No one should go through this not ever.

The main door slide open revealing a beat up, Tony. Clint started to clap waking you from you light slumber. Your eyes peeled open, your heart stuttered see how bad of shape he was in not only physically but even in his body language you see an exhausted beaten man. You can’t quite make out their words yet you hear having yet to fully come back. It slowly fades in though. 

“You need anything?" 

Sam gives him a sneer. "Why don’t you ask the girls that?!” Tony turns first seeing Wanda he takes her in, when he turns towards you first he is surprised. Probably didn’t even know you were here, then his face falls taking you in. 

“What happened, how… Why is she like this?”

“You happened that’s what, you and that butt buddy Ross of yours, she was brought here before us when we got here she was already this bad." 

You see Tony’s face fell even more, you reach out your hand it shakes so much and is so heavy that you drop it almost immediately. Tony lurches forward slightly, Sam chuckles. 

"You don’t get the right to care what happens to her not anymore. You chose your side and now she pays the consequent for them. We are nothing but the enemy now." 

You try to shake your head but can’t you see the black swarming the edge of your vision pulling you in. To other, it looks like your shaking and then your eyes flutter close. They all sigh it’s the first real rest you had gotten. You again start to mumble a little, the same phrase "I’ll be here.”

“She’s waiting for him. You know she only says it to him.” Sam whispers. 

“Where is he?" 

When you next awaken Tony is gone and the others breathe a sigh of relief when you wake up. You had been out for several hours that they were unsure if you would ever wake up. You have gotten a bit of your strength back when you are next taken to Dr. Keigal he didn’t go about it his usual way. He seemed to be stuck. 

"It appears the cures are not working, in fact, it is killing you slowly. The cure has now become the poison in this case. We shall just have to find another way. You are so interesting my dear. This will be the most compelling thing I have ever done. I may even get published.” He starts to whistle, grabbing different things not really paying you any mind. He collects some samples and sends you on your way.

Dropped on the bed you turn to look at Sam, he is examining you trying to see if anything changed, not seeing anything he meets your gaze. 

“Wha… what.. what happened?” Your voice is sore from disuse. It comes out rust and shallows a mere whisper. It is so far removed from how you usually talk that it takes Sam a moment to collect himself. He starts with right where you left the picture. 

You listen to his story, the others input things as he goes in, completing the story. They even shared a smile when you learned that Steve had gotten up the courage to kiss Sharon. Your heart skips a little when you hear this. You meet Sams eyes after this and you can tell he knows what he said had hurt you.

“He’s going to come (Y/N) I promise.”

“I don’t doubt it, but I’ll stay here.” He tries to interrupt you, you shake your head. “No Sam we had a deal when he comes you make him leave me here. Not worth the risk to you guys I can barely move as it is. And…” You are choking up you remember what he had told you before you parted ways. “Steve knows what I am, I’ll just screw everything up again if I go.”

“You know he didn’t mean it like that, don’t give up please (Y/N).”

“Monsters belong in cages, heroes need to be free." 

Everyone looked at each other having absolutely no idea how to make you see that you were a hero, in more ways than one. If anything it was you that deserved to be out there the most. Sitting in silence, you all look at your present situation. Each was thinking of what they would do when they got out. You had nodded off again, once more muttering your phrase. 

"Why does she say that?” Scott asked. 

Clint responded, “She’s done that since I picked her up years ago, at first it was because she wanted people to know that she existed. She was kept by this mercenary group, stashed in a little closet all day. I think she did it to remind herself that she wasn’t going anywhere and she did, in fact, exist to others.”

Sam continued “it’s changed over the years though, we became family. She didn’t need to reassure her self as much anymore. She only says it to Steve now, but when I think about it its always as he’s leaving or during a mission.”

“What does it mean now?" 

You had awakened to hear Sam’s explanation. You turn to your side looking out "It meant I was there, I would be there to help whenever he needed me or how he needed me. Even if it meant getting captured or staying out of the way and not screwing up his plans." 

Sam and Clint looked at you in your bed torn to pieces both physically and mentally, there wasn’t much left of the person you used to be.  You had more convulsions through the night, no one ever came leaving you to ride them all through. Your skin was stretched and sunken into your face. The one that needed put the most was you.

Your heads all swung to the door when a cart could be heard rattling in. In stepped Dr. Kreigal. You tense up, the others start to growl. 

"Well hello my friends, I thought I would bring the fun to you. See what it is we do every day together. (Y/N), I hope you're ready I had time to go over your data and I want to try something new. I’m sure this will work.”

He rolls the cart into your cell and guards that came with strapped you down to your bed. The others were now shouting and banging against the glass, threatening him with anything they could imagine. Sam turns to grab something hoping to break the glass so he can get to you. Turning back around he finds Steve walking in, he rushes to the window pointing toward your open cell. He looks around to see the doctor uncaping the needle to start. Steve flew into action, pulling the doctor on away from you and into the wall.

The doctor let out an outraged scream, surging forward toward Steve. He tries to pry him away while Steve was undoing the straps around your legs. He twists and lands a punch once again sending the doctor back, but this time he doesn’t get back up, having been rendered unconscious. He goes back to finish loosening all the straps, once free he keeps you there while he liberates the others. Sam runs over to you and lifts you into his arms. You try a feeble attempt to push him back. Silently pleading with him to leave you here.

Sam doesn’t budge, “Hey you said Steve couldn’t save you, you never said I couldn’t. Let’s get you out of here." 

They all trudge out and into a waiting jet, a number of them are surprised to see T'Challa sitting in the pilot seat. Sam placed you down on a bench and began to strap you down for taking off. 

"No, please no.” You whimpered, flinching when he lifted the strap.

“We need to secure you for taking off then they can go. I promise no one will hurt you.”

You shake your head curling in on yourself to make it harder to strap you down. Seeing thus Steve walks over and picks you up, cradling you against his chest. He sits back down and straps himself in keep your firmly to his chest. “I got her.” Sam nods and walks away to find his own seat.

Take off is smooth and soon enough the plane levels out. Steve has started to stroke your thigh. The feeling relaxes you, so much you practically melt into him. Silence descends on the plane, the low grumble of the engine sending you to sleep. Steve feels the final bit of tension drain from you when he looks down, seeing your eyes closed in slumber.

He pulls you a little closer, he is having a hard time comprehending that he almost lost you. Even now looking at how frail you looked there was still a chance. He glances up to look at Sam the question already in his eyes.

“What happened to her?” He keeps his voice low, not wanting to wake you.

Sam looks down at you, “I don’t really know, she didn’t exactly tell us, but that quack doctor was pumping her full of something. It’s making her break down, she had convulsions all last night off and on wouldn’t be surprised if another one was on the way.”

He continues to tell him all the things that happened while they were in jail. After a moment of silence, Steve told them everything that had happened after their capture, even how Bucky was involved in Tony’s parents’ death. They were a little surprised but overall it wasn’t that unthinkable.

About halfway to their destination, your arm started to twitch. At first, Steve thought you were waking up, but the shake seemed to travel up your arm and spread through your body. He looks up panicked, “Sam what’s happening how do I stop this?”

“You don’t, just let it happen, hold her tight so she doesn’t hurt herself.” Steve immediately squeezes you, not that you could get any closer but he could try. It lasts about a minute, you quiet down and Steve loosens his arms just a little scared that you may begin again. He tears up how much pain you had gone through while you weren’t with him. 

“I’ll be here” you’ve mumbled as per usual now. “I’ll be here.” You shift closer to him. Gripping on to him, feeling his warmth and how solid he was you begin to wake up.

Very slowly you lift your eyelids and see a broad chest. You trail your eyes up to meet clear blue eyes above you. You start to tear up, he’s here, right in front of you. You can feel him, your not making him up. He’s back with you, tears make their way down your cheeks.

“I know I’m here,” h3 seems to read your thoughts exactly. “I’m not going anywhere. Please don’t cry I hate when you cry. Makes me want to cry.” He starts to wipe the tears away. Still telling you that everything was going to be ok. You continue to stare at each other for a while, caught in your own little bubble. Soon though your eyes drift shut with Steve looking down upon you.

“She’s been saying that a lot now in her sleep. I think she’s calling for you most times.” Sam says when he is sure she is asleep.

Steve doesn’t look up, “I know she really only says it to me and I enjoy it. It’s like our own little thing, but I know it means more than what she lets on." 

"You’ll have to ask her when she’s better.” They continue to stare at her in the quiet as they finish this journey. Both keen on protecting her from anything that might come your way. With your phase echoing around them, the plane soared through the air. “I’ll be here.”

@annadier

I'll be Here Epilogue

Steve X Reader

Summary: The end how did Steve and you end up what will happen now?!

A/N: Thank you all for reading my very first series. I hope you all enjoyed it.

Warnings: Fluff nothing but Fluff now

@veronicalei

2 Months Later

The past months had been hard, the treatment had worked but it had taken time to reverse the damage. You had been seizure free now for 2 weeks. All signs that you had under gone any torture remaind in lost weight, which if you were being honest wasn’t bad at all you looked good a few pounds down. The only other difference left was lack of strength, running was a big no no and sometimes long walks. Each day though, Steve and yourself would make a point to make it further in the jungle gardens of Wakanda. You began to mark how far you had gotten and every day you passed it you would shout in joy and mark the point. Steve would pick you up and carry you back to your room or the nearest bench.

Now though was your first real dare with Steve. He had stuck by your side through everything. With that being said you had both agreed to wait until you were better. This didn’t stop you from having movie nights and dinner together. You had gotten to know each other so much better and if either of you had any doubts you didn’t any more. Like to puzzle piece you locked together mixing perfectly. Being confined you still had your moments of arguing but you wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Wanda was helping you dress for tonight pinning your hair into something suitable and cute. Your makeup was natural nothing to extravagant. Your dress was a little play on a 20s dress in your favorite color. With kitty heals on you twist and turn, making sure every crease and angle looked good. Without a flaw in sight you turn to Wanda who raises her hands up in a pair of thumbs up.

“You look gorgeous, going to make that old man have a heart attack just looking at you.” She gushes at you.

You blush, “Thank you Wanada, for everything I couldn’t have done it without you.” You two had grown close in your hiding out, when Steve had been busy she had stated and helped you with physical therapy. Urging and cheering you on every step of the way. Of course she had helped you pick out tonight’s outfit carefully picking out picture after picture until you both decide on the dress. You were close before the fallout but now you considered her your sister.

A knock sounds on the door, you freeze suddenly nervous. Your eyes lock on to Wanada who gives you a reassuring smile and turns you to face the door pushing you towards it. Opening the door you are greeted by Steve looking down at a bouquet of (Y/F/F). You smile he looks so nervous, a small giggle escapes and his head jerks up locking eyes with you.

“He… Hey, how are you?” He stutters clearing his throat.

“I’m good, how are you?” You keep smiling it’s nice to see him so nervous like this it’s cute.

“I’m… I’m good, thes.. these are for you!” He jerks the flowers out to you placing them in your hands while blushing like a school girl. You start to laugh, bending over slightly.

“Steve its just me, relax a little bit.” You grab his shoulder shaking him slightly. “Thank you for the flowers, I can’t believe you found them here.”

“I may have a connection or two.” He admits. He keeps getting redder, your laugh is sending butterflies through his stomach making him even more nervous. You turn around handing the flowers to Wanda to put in water. Turning back you hold your arm out for him to take.

“Where to soldier, I’m ready for whatever.”

“Well ma'am I hope you are. I have many things planned if you are up to it. I thought we could work out appetites up by taking a stroll first, then dinner.” He gains courage as he plays along finally ready to take you out. Hooking arms with a nod of your head, you head out.

The weather has cooled slightly this evening making it a perfect evening to stroll. You keep passing all your markers, each one bring a memory back and you chat the whole way. Finally you reach a little alcove with a long wooden table set up candles all around and soft music playing in the back ground. You squeeze his arm getting excited, at the dinner to come. When you reach the table you notice that there are multiple place settings and there is way more food than just two people can eat even if one is a super solider. You glance up at Steve with a confused look on your face one eyebrow raised demanding an explanation.

Steve is chuckling at your expressions, without a word he turns you around. There behind you in the path you had just come from is the team. Not just Steve’s side but everyone. Tony with a smug grin, Natasha with her knowing look, all of them. You burst into tears and run towards them, you practically tackle Tony to get your arms around him. He chuckles pulling you in close.

“I thought you said she was getting better but still weak. That was a full on linebackers tackle. How could you Steve?” The team laughs. You are passed between them all each getting a hug as tight as you can manage. After finally releasing Vision you step back and swing to face Steve.

“What is this I thought this was a date? What are they all doing here?”

Steve rubs the back of his neck, “It is a date with a family break in the middle.” You smile had to be the best care ever.

“Excuse me love birds, I don’t know about you but after a 10 hour flight I am famished.” Natasha interrupts, festering to the table. With another laugh you all sit down and share a meal. Through out the night you would pause and just watch everyone interact with each other. People that had been enemies just months ago sharing conversation and even laughing.

A special moment came when Tony and Bucky shook hands and shared a laugh over Steve’s radical behavior on missions. You sigh in contentment, you realize everything is going to be alright. Yeah the team hit some bumps but without a doubt they would come back and they would come back even stronger.

Steve grabs your hand under the table stroking his thumb once again along your knuckles. It had become a habit of his, you think it was mostly to reassure himself that you were still here. You two share a look and as quietly as you can extract yourselves from the table. The others have noticed but don’t say anything after all the two of you were on a date.

You continue on your stroll until you come to an opening in the path that shows the stars above you. You hadn’t realized how dark it had gotten until just then. You stare up in wonder trying to take them all in. Steve in the other hand us looking at you, he didn’t need to look up to see the stars because he could find them right here in your eyes.

“I can feel you staring.” You say not taking your eyes off the sky.

“Oh good now I don’t have to pretend to not be. I like looking at you. More beautiful than all the stars up there.” You blush as he says this. Of course he sees this, he wraps his arms around you pulling you into him. Now you are both staring into each other’s eyes.

“Thank you for this evening, it was the most perfect date anyone could have ever given me.”

“I would do this for you a thousand times over, if I got to see all those expressions I saw today with you.” You hold each other in comfortable silence letting the night drift away. Finally Steve breaks it by asking “if you don’t mind would you tell me what you mean when you say, ‘I’ll be here’?”

You chuckle to yourself, “Well it used to mean something different, but now it means that whenever you need me I’ll be her to help you. No matter what it is or how bad it may seem, nothing will ever change. I’ll be right here for you.”

He has no words for this, he looks into your face and the only thing he can think of he does. Cupping your jaw he tilts you head up to him, leaning down he presses his lips to yours putting everything he is into this kiss. You melt into him accepting everything that he is giving you. With a final press you separate. Leaning his head on yours, you start your future together with a “I’ll be here.”

200 Followers!!!

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START OF SOMETHING NEW - Prologue

A/N: I’m starting another series not sure how it will be received. A little angst buys mostly a reader learning to love herself and that the universe isn’t out to get her.

Bucky X Plus size!Reader

Warnings: Slow burn, like seriously slow, self-depreciation

You had always wanted to get married. Wanted a family, people to take care of and get care from. There must be something wrong with you though because no one ever looked your way. It never happened to you, no double glances because you looked gorgeous. No one ever flirted with you, maybe you were broken in some fashion.

For a while, you had convinced yourself that it was ok not to have anyone. Every once in a while you had to face it. No one wanted you. It came in the form of an off-handed comment from a friend or when hanging out and people paired up leaving you to shuffle from pair to pair trying not to intrude on them too much.

You couldn’t pinpoint exactly where you fell short. You certainly weren’t fit, round, pudgy, potato impersonator. You weren’t ugly no but you weren’t beautiful. A talent of yours was making people laugh, generally enjoying your presence. But at the end of the day, you had to believe that no one should be forced to deal with you. It was better this way.

It didn’t really help that you were somehow friends with the hottest group of heroes the world had ever seen. You weren’t even sure how it happened in the first place. You work in the Compound but you weren’t an agent. You were a cook in the cafeteria for the rest of the agents. Not the most noticeable, but Tony had found you cooking and cleaning late in the evening. Demanding food, you fed him and like a pigeon he kept coming back looking for more.

It seemed he spread the word because every once in a while another new face would appear seeking the same. You turned into a listening ear as well. A silent partner that would allow them to get everything off a chest and return to their lives.

In essence, you were a support character, not only in everyone’s life but yours as well. You knew though that if that was all you were meant to be then you would be the best support you can. Just because you didn’t get a happy ending doesn’t mean you could help your friends reach theirs, whatever role you had to be.

@justreadingfics @buckyappreciationsociety @veronicalei @ohlookfanfiction @theassetseyeliner @marvelous-imagining @metalarmproblems