123 Ideas For Character Flaws
123 Ideas for Character Flaws
Absent-minded - Preoccupied to the extent of being unaware of one’s immediate surroundings. Abstracted, daydreaming, inattentive, oblivious, forgetful.
Abusive - Characterized by improper infliction of physical or psychological maltreatment towards another.
Addict - One who is addicted to a compulsive activity. Examples: gambling, drugs, sex.
Aimless - Devoid of direction or purpose.
Alcoholic - A person who drinks alcoholic substances habitually and to excess.
Anxious - Full of mental distress or uneasiness because of fear of danger or misfortune; greatly worried; solicitous.
Arrogant - Having or displaying a sense of overbearing self-worth or self-importance. Inclined to social exclusiveness and who rebuff the advances of people considered inferior. Snobbish.
Audacious - Recklessly bold in defiance of convention, propriety, law, or the like; insolent; braze, disobedient.
Bad Habit - A revolting personal habit. Examples: picks nose, spits tobacco, drools, bad body odour.
Bigmouth - A loud-mouthed or gossipy person.
Bigot - One who is strongly partial to one’s own group, religion, race, or politics and is intolerant of those who differ.
Blunt - Characterized by directness in manner or speech; without subtlety or evasion. Frank, callous, insensitive, brusque.
Bold - In a bad sense, too forward; taking undue liberties; over assuming or confident; lacking proper modesty or restraint; rude; impudent. Abrupt, brazen, cheeky, brassy, audacious.
Callous - They are hardened to emotions, rarely showing any form of it in expression. Unfeeling. Cold.
Childish - Marked by or indicating a lack of maturity; puerile.
Complex - An exaggerated or obsessive concern or fear. (List specific complex.)
Cruel - Mean to anyone or anything, without care or regard to consequences and feelings.
Cursed - A person who has befallen a prayer for evil or misfortune, placed under a spell, or borne into an evil circumstance, and suffers for it. Damned.
Dependent - Unable to exist, sustain oneself, or act appropriately or normally without the assistance or direction of another.
Deranged - Mentally decayed. Insane. Crazy. Mad. Psychotic.
Dishonest – Given to or using fraud, cheating; deceitful, deceptive, crooked, underhanded.
Disloyal - Lacking loyalty. Unfaithful, perfidious, traitorous, treasonable
Disorder - An ailment that affects the function of mind or body. (List the disorders name if they have one.) See the Mental Disorder List.
Disturbed - Showing some or a few signs or symptoms of mental or emotional illness. Confused, disordered, neurotic, troubled.
Dubious - Fraught with uncertainty or doubt. Undecided, doubtful, unsure.
Dyslexic - Affected by dyslexia, a learning disorder marked by impairment of the ability to recognize and comprehend written words.
Egotistical - Characteristic of those having an inflated idea of their own importance. Boastful, pompous.
Envious - Showing extreme cupidity; painfully desirous of another’s advantages; covetous, jealous.
Erratic - Deviating from the customary course in conduct or opinion; eccentric: erratic behaviour. Eccentric, bizarre, outlandish, strange.
Fanatical - Fanatic outlook or behaviour especially as exhibited by excessive enthusiasm, unreasoning zeal, or wild and extravagant notions on some subject.
Fickle – Erratic, changeable, unstable - especially with regard to affections or attachments; capricious.
Fierce - Marked by extreme intensity of emotions or convictions; inclined to react violently; fervid.
Finicky - Excessively particular or fastidious; difficult to please; fussy. Too much concerned with detail. Meticulous, fastidious, choosy, critical, picky, prissy, pernickety.
Fixated - In psychoanalytic theory, a strong attachment to a person or thing, especially such an attachment formed in childhood or infancy and manifested in immature or neurotic behaviour that persists throughout life. Fetish, quirk, obsession, infatuation.
Flirt -To make playfully romantic or sexual overtures; behaviour intended to arouse sexual interest. Minx. Tease.
Gluttonous - Given to excess in consumption of especially food or drink. Voracious, ravenous, wolfish, piggish, insatiable.
Gruff - Brusque or stern in manner or appearance. Crusty, rough, surly.
Gullible - Will believe any information given, regardless of how valid or truthful it is, easily deceived or duped.
Hard - A person who is difficult to deal with, manage, control, overcome, or understand. Hard emotions, hard hearted.
Hedonistic - Pursuit of or devotion to pleasure, especially to the pleasures of the senses.
Hoity-toity- Given to flights of fancy; capricious; frivolous. Prone to giddy behaviour, flighty.
Humourless - The inability to find humour in things, and most certainly in themselves.
Hypocritical - One who is always contradicting their own beliefs, actions or sayings. A person who professes beliefs and opinions for others that he does not hold. Being a hypocrite.
Idealist - One whose conduct is influenced by ideals that often conflict with practical considerations. One who is unrealistic and impractical, guided more by ideals than by practical considerations.
Idiotic - Marked by a lack of intelligence or care; foolish or careless.
Ignorant - Lacking knowledge or information as to a particular subject or fact. Showing or arising from a lack of education or knowledge.
Illiterate - Unable to read and write.
Immature - Emotionally undeveloped; juvenile; childish.
Impatient - Unable to wait patiently or tolerate delay; restless. Unable to endure irritation or opposition; intolerant.
Impious - Lacking piety and reverence for a god/gods and their followers.
Impish - Naughtily or annoyingly playful.
Incompetent - Unable to execute tasks, no matter how the size or difficulty.
Indecisive - Characterized by lack of decision and firmness, especially under pressure.
Indifferent - The trait of lacking enthusiasm for or interest in things generally, remaining calm and seeming not to care; a casual lack of concern. Having or showing little or no interest in anything; languid; spiritless.
Infamy - Having an extremely bad reputation, public reproach, or strong condemnation as the result of a shameful, criminal, or outrageous act that affects how others view them.
Intolerant - Unwilling to tolerate difference of opinion and narrow-minded about cherished opinions.
Judgemental - Inclined to make and form judgements, especially moral or personal ones, based on one’s own opinions or impressions towards others/practices/groups/religions based on appearance, reputation, occupation, etc.
Klutz - Clumsy. Blunderer.
Lazy - Resistant to work or exertion; disposed to idleness.
Lewd - Inclined to, characterized by, or inciting to lust or lechery; lascivious. Obscene or indecent, as language or songs; salacious.
Liar - Compulsively and purposefully tells false truths more often than not. A person who has lied or who lies repeatedly.
Lustful - Driven by lust; preoccupied with or exhibiting lustful desires.
Masochist - The deriving of sexual gratification, or the tendency to derive sexual gratification, from being physically or emotionally abused. A willingness or tendency to subject oneself to unpleasant or trying experiences.
Meddlesome - Intrusive in a meddling or offensive manner, given to meddling; interfering.
Meek - Evidencing little spirit or courage; overly submissive or compliant; humble in spirit or manner; suggesting retiring mildness or even cowed submissiveness.
Megalomaniac - A psycho pathological condition characterized by delusional fantasies of wealth, power, or omnipotence.
Naïve - Lacking worldly experience and understanding, simple and guileless; showing or characterized by a lack of sophistication and critical judgement.
Nervous - Easily agitated or distressed; high-strung or jumpy.
Non-violent - Abstaining from the use of violence.
Nosey - Given to prying into the affairs of others; snoopy. Offensively curious or inquisitive.
Obsessive - An unhealthy and compulsive preoccupation with something or someone.
Oppressor - A person of authority who subjects others to undue pressures, to keep down by severe and unjust use of force or authority.
Overambitious - Having a strong excessive desire for success or achievement.
Overconfident - Excessively confident; presumptuous.
Overemotional - Excessively or abnormally emotional. Sensitive about themselves and others, more so than the average person.
Overprotective - To protect too much; coddle.
Overzealous - Marked by excessive enthusiasm for and intense devotion to a cause or idea.
Pacifist - Opposition to war or violence as a means of resolving disputes. (Can double as a merit in certain cases)
Paranoid - Exhibiting or characterized by extreme and irrational fear or distrust of others.
Peevish - Expressing fretfulness and discontent, or unjustifiable dissatisfaction. Cantankerous, cross, ill-tempered, testy, captious, discontented, crotchety, cranky, ornery.
Perfectionist - A propensity for being displeased with anything that is not perfect or does not meet extremely high standards.
Pessimist - A tendency to stress the negative or unfavourable or to take the gloomiest possible view.
Pest - One that pesters or annoys, with or without realizing it. Nuisance. Annoying. Nag.
Phobic – They have a severe form of fear when it comes to this one thing. Examples: Dark, Spiders, Cats
Practical - Level-headed, efficient, and unspeculative. No-nonsense.
Predictable - Easily seen through and assessable, where almost anyone can predict reactions and actions of said person by having met or known them even for a short time.
Proud - Filled with or showing excessive self-esteem and will often shirk help from others for the sake of pride.
Rebellious - Defying or resisting some established authority, government, or tradition; insubordinate; inclined to rebel.
Reckless - Heedless. Headstrong. Foolhardy. Unthinking boldness, wild carelessness and disregard for consequences.
Remorseless - Without remorse; merciless; pitiless; relentless.
Rigorous - Rigidly accurate; allowing no deviation from a standard; demanding strict attention to rules and procedures.
Sadist - The deriving of sexual gratification or the tendency to derive sexual gratification from inflicting pain or emotional abuse on others. Deriving of pleasure, or the tendency to derive pleasure, from cruelty.
Sadomasochist - Both sadist and masochist combined.
Sarcastic - A subtle form of mockery in which an intended meaning is conveyed obliquely.
Sceptic - One who instinctively or habitually doubts, questions, or disagrees with assertions or generally accepted conclusions.
Seducer - To lead others astray, as from duty, rectitude, or the like; corrupt. To attempt to lead or draw someone away, as from principles, faith, or allegiance.
Selfish - Concerned chiefly or only with oneself.
Self-Martyr - One who purposely makes a great show of suffering in order to arouse sympathy from others, as a form of manipulation, and always for a selfish cause or reason.
Self-righteous - Piously sure of one’s own righteousness; moralistic. Exhibiting pious self-assurance. Holier-than-thou, sanctimonious.
Senile - Showing a decline or deterioration of physical strength or mental functioning, esp. short-term memory and alertness, as a result of old age or disease.
Shallow - Lacking depth of intellect or knowledge; concerned only with what is obvious.
Smart Ass - Thinks they know it all, and in some ways they may, but they can be greatly annoying and difficult to deal with at times, especially in arguments.
Soft-hearted - Having softness or tenderness of heart that can lead them into trouble; susceptible of pity or other kindly affection. They cannot resist helping someone they see in trouble, suffering or in need, and often don’t think of the repercussions or situation before doing so.
Solemn - Deeply earnest, serious, and sober.
Spineless - Lacking courage. Cowardly, wimp, lily-livered, gutless.
Spiteful - Showing malicious ill will and a desire to hurt; motivated by spite; vindictive person who will look for occasions for resentment. Vengeful.
Spoiled - Treated with excessive indulgence and pampering from earliest childhood, and has no notion of hard work, self-care or money management; coddled, pampered. Having the character or disposition harmed by pampering or over-solicitous attention.
Squeamish - Excessively fastidious and easily disgusted.
Stubborn - Unreasonably, often perversely unyielding; bull-headed. Firmly resolved or determined; resolute.
Superstitious - An irrational belief arising from ignorance or fear from an irrational belief that an object, action, or circumstance not logically related to a course of events influences its outcome.
Tactless - Lacking or showing a lack of what is fitting and considerate in dealing with others.
Temperamental - Moody, irritable, or sensitive. Excitable, volatile, emotional.
Theatrical - Having a flair for over dramatizing situations, doing things in a ‘big way’ and love to be ‘centre stage’.
Timid -Tends to be shy and/or quiet, shrinking away from offering opinions or from strangers and newcomers, fearing confrontations and violence.
Tongue-tied - Speechless or confused in expression, as from shyness, embarrassment, or astonishment.
Troublemaker - Someone who deliberately stirs up trouble, intentionally or unintentionally.
Unlucky - Marked by or causing misfortune; ill-fated. Destined for misfortune; doomed.
Unpredictable - Difficult to foretell or foresee, their actions are so chaotic it’s impossible to know what they are going to do next.
Untrustworthy - Not worthy of trust or belief. Backstabber.
Vain - Holding or characterized by an unduly high opinion of their physical appearance. Lovers of themselves. Conceited, egotistic, narcissistic.
Weak-willed - Lacking willpower, strength of will to carry out one’s decisions, wishes, or plans. Easily swayed.
Withdrawn - Not friendly or Sociable. Aloof.
Zealous - A fanatic.
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More Posts from Mariewritcs
do you have any writing exercises for describing locations? :)
Use all the senses. What does the place look, sound, smell, and feel like? What kind of props, furniture, color, scheme, or plant life is there? How does it make you or your character feel/react? After you’ve done this, trim the details that only clutter your story.
Describe a place you’ve been that you remember well. For me it’s a section of country road I found breathtaking as a kid and have never stopped loving.
Look around you and find something, or several things, to focus on. Describe them down to their finest detail; the water stains on a steel drinking fountain, the uneven grain of a faux wood door, the alien-looking stereo system, or the dust bunny hanging from a wall vent.
In any location, ask yourself “If was kidnapped and held captive here but found a phone, how would I describe where I was to the police?” Look for exits, objects you could use to break windows or pick locks, survival supplies, and information that would tell you where you are.
In any location, ask yourself “If I was on the run from the police or Big Brother, what in this area would get me caught?” Look for cameras, spies, sensors, and anything on you personally that could be tracking you (same rules apply if you’re planning to hypothetically commit a crime).
In any location, imagine you’re answering questions for a space alien, time traveler, or foreign immigrant about your surroundings.
In your home/bedroom, imagine you’re an investigator or that you have amnesia and must learn about yourself from your personnal belongings. Describe what you see and what it might say about you to someone who doesn’t have you there to explain it.
These are all the exercises I’ve practiced personally that I can remember. Hope you find them useful!
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41 Emotions as Expressed through Body Language
Found Here x
41 Emotions as Expressed through Body Language Unique
This list, while exhausting, is soooo not exhaustive; it barely scratches the surface. And each entry could easily become cliché (if it isn’t already). But, it should be enough to get you started. Want more? Start watching people (not in a creepy way), and take notes of what they seem to do when expressing different emotions. Your repertoire of expression will double in no time. PS—do not use these for actual, real-life body language reading; you will fail. These are strictly novelistic.
Awed -Slack -jawed, raised eyebrows, staring -Frozen, slack body language (Self? What self? There is only Zuul.) -Take a step back and put a hand to his heart
Amused -Smiling and throwing back her head laughing -Slapping her thighs, stamping her feet, clapping her hands -Shaking her head (That’s so wrong!)
Angry/Aggressive -Sharp movements, like shaking a fist, pointing, slashing, or slamming a fist on a table -Flushed face, patchy red blotches -Tension in neck—chords standing out, veins throbbing—and jutting or tucked chin -Arms akimbo, or clenching fists -Entering someone else’s space and forcing them out -Poofing up with a wide stance (I am big! Very big!), arms wide (Bring it!) -Lowered eyebrows, squinting eyes -Teeth bared, jaw clenched, snarling
Annoyed -Pressing lips together into a thin line -Narrowing eyes sometimes with slight head tilt (Why do you still exist?) -Rolling eyes, often paired with a long-suffering sigh
Anxious -Fidgeting, such as tearing grass into little pieces, playing with a ring, or chewing on a pencil -Biting lower lip, swallowing unnecessarily -Quickened breathing or holding breath -Darting eyes -Pallor, sweating, clammy palms -Unusually high-pitched, “nervous” laughter -Hunched shoulders -Pacing
Attentive -Slow head nodding with a furrowed brow -Leaning forward, toward the speaker, and sitting up -Taking notes -Looking over the top of her glasses
Bored -Resting his head on his palm, peeking out between the fingers, maybe even slipping so his head “accidentally” hits the table -Tapping toes, twirling pencil, doodling, and otherwise fidgeting -Staring out a window, or at anything remotely more interesting (Which is everything …)
Confident -Arms clasped behind body -Head lifted, chest out, standing tall -Walking briskly and making firm, precise movements
Confused -Tilting head with narrowed eyes -A furrowed brow -Shrugging
Contempt/Superiority -Lifted chin (The better to look down the nose.) -Pursed lips, sneering, slight frown -Circling a shoulder, stretching her neck, turning away—anything to indicate she doesn’t see the person as a threat or worthy of her attention -Grabbing her lapels, or tucking her thumbs in her waistcoat (See this clothing? It is much nicer than yours.) -Dismissive hand-waving
Cynical/Sarcastic/Bitter -Twisted lips or a half-smile -Sneering, sometimes with shaking the head and other defensive body language -Pressed lips with a slight frown -Eye rolling
Defensive -Crossed arms, legs, crossed anything, really (Well, maybe not fingers … or eyes …) -Arms out, palms forward (Stop!) -Placing anything (sword, shield, book, backpack) in front of her body
Disgusted -Crinkling his nose -Curling his lip and/or showing the tip of his tongue briefly -Flinching back and interposing a shoulder or turning away -Covering his nose, gagging, and squinting his eyes shut—hard—for a moment. (It assaults all the senses.)
Displeased -A plastered-on fake smile (You suck; but I can’t tell you that. So here: a fake smile! Enjoy.) -Pouting or frowning (I’ll cry if you don’t give me what I want—don’t test me, I will!) -Crossed arms and other defensive/frustrated body language (I will not let that terrible idea influence me!)
Distressed -Wide eyes and shallow, rapid breathing -Beating the walls, or huddling into a corner -Clasping hands over his head protectively -Rocking himself -Handwringing -Running his hands through his hair
Earnest/Passionate -Leaning forward, nodding, wide eyes with strong eye contact and raised eyebrows -Hand on heart, or presented palms-up, or otherwise visible -A double-handed handshake (I really want to make sure you understand me!)
Embarrassment -Blushing -Stammering -Covering her face with her hands or bowing her head (I’m so embarrassed, I can’t look!) -Difficulty maintaining eye contact, looking down and away
Excited/Anticipation -Rubbing hands together (I can’t wait to get my hands on it!) -Licking lips (It’s so close I can taste it!) -A vigorous, pumping handshake (I can’t wait to get started!) -Jumping up and down (Look at me being literal here! I am jumping for joy.) -A wide and easy grin
Flirty -Eye play, like winking, looking up through the lashes, over the shoulder glances, and eye catching -Preening, like hair flipping or smooth, clothing straightening, spine straightening, etc. -Striking a cowboy pose, with his thumbs gripping his belt tight
Frustrated -Shaking his head (You are so wrong!) -Massaging temples (My brain—it hurts.) -Clasping his wrist in his opposite hand, behind his back (Bad arm! No biscuit.) -Running his hands through his hair (All this frustration is making my hair mussy. I can feel it.) -Grabbing onto something like armrests, or white-knuckled interdigitation (Restrain yourself!)
Happy -Smiling and laughing -Eyes and nose crinkling -Swinging her arms, spinning loosely, dancing, jumping
Impatience -Quick head nodding (Get on with it!) -Toe/finger tapping (Hear this? These are seconds. Wasted. Listening to you.) -Sighing, checking the clock/sundial/freckles (Time. It is moving so slowly.)
Jealous -Tight lips, or a sour expression -Narrow eyes locked on the perpetrator, to the point of a stare down -Crossed arms, and additional frustrated, angry, possessive, or bitter body language
Lying -Scratching their nose, ear, neck, miscellaneous part of face -Sudden change in behavior or demeanor, including shifty eye contact, lots of long blinking, shrugging -Ill-timed smiles or laughter (This is how I normally smile, right? Right???) -Additional anxiety body language -Shaking head no while saying “yes” (I can’t believe I just lied.) -Licking lips, covering mouth, touching mouth, etc.
Overwhelmed -Both palms to forehead, fingers splayed (This gives me a headache.) -Covering eyes with one hand (If I can’t see the world, it can’t see me …) -Eyes wide and staring into space, hands gripping the table in front of her (… Woah.)
Playful/Friendly -Winking -Waggling eyebrows -Tiny shoves or nudge
Pleasure -Head tilted back, lips parted slightly, eyes wide or closed -Slow, languorous movements, stretching (such as arching her neck or back) -Slight flush, quickened breath and pulse
Possessive -Handshake with arm clasp -Putting hands on or around someone’s shoulders, neck, waist, back, or even just the wall near them -Standing in someone’s personal space, body positioned toward that person -Any one-sided act of intimacy, like running a knuckle down someone’s cheek -Staring down any who get too close
Proud/Dominant -Chin up, chest out, shoulders back -A painfully hard handshake that not only squishes the bones, but also forces his hand on top -Leaning back with his hands behind his head, and his feet up -Strong, unblinking, focused eye contact
Reluctance/Resistance -Arms crossed, sometimes with fists (Not happening.) -Dragging feet (But I don’t wanna!) -Pinching nose (You want me to do what now?) -Clamping hands over ears (La la la la!)
Sad/Upset -Droopy body (and anything held, like a sword), bowed in shoulders, wrapping arms around self -Slow movements with hesitation -Bottom lip jutting out and/or quivering -Crying, sobbing, body shaking, sniffling, wet eyes
Secretive -A tight-lipped smile (My lips are zipped.) -Hiding her hands in her pockets (What has it got in its nasty little pocket?) -Looking away
Scared -Hunched shoulders, shrinking back from others (Don’t hurt me!) -Wide eyes and lifted eyebrows (The better to see them coming.) -Shaking, trembling, or freezing -Rocking from side to side, sometimes holding self (It’ll all be okay, self, it’ll all be okay.)
Shame -Slumped shoulders (Don’t look at me.) -Trouble meeting your gaze, looking down and away -Burying her face in her hands or bowing her head (I can’t face the world right now.)
Shocked -Hands covering her mouth, or mouth hanging open, sometimes with a gasp (If I had words, I would be saying them.) -Freezing and staring with wide eyes and eyebrows raised (Diverting all resources toward staring.) -Smacking a palm into his forehead (Clearly, my head isn’t working right, or I wouldn’t have seen that)
Shy -Avoids eye contact, or has only fleeting eye contact (Eye contact means you might speak to me.) -Keeps a fair distance from everyone, and will back away if someone steps closer (Space invaders!) -Folded arms, head down, and other defensive body language (If I make myself small, they can’t see me.)
Smug -Slight, close-lipped smile (occasionally one-sided) and sometimes one raised eyebrow (I know something you don’t know.) -Chin slightly tucked, Mona Lisa smile, raised eyebrows (I know better.) -Finger steepling (I am so smaaaht.)
Suspicious/Skeptical/Disbelief -Narrowed eyes, sometimes with a sidelong glance or raised eyebrow (Perhaps if I look at it out of the corner of my eye, I will catch it unawares.) -Rubbing his eyes (I can’t believe what I’m metaphorically or literally seeing!) -Shaking his head (I—I don’t believe it.) -Blowing out cheeks (Well , I don’t know …)
Tired -Rubbing his eyes, eyes staring into space, raised eyebrows (Raising my eyebrows helps keep my eyes open.) -Yawning and/or stretching (I am tired—see? Tired! Too tired to care!) -Almost nodding off and jerking awake (Cannot. Stay. Awa—snnnnurzzzz.) -Gritting teeth to stay awake (Cannot—yawn—dang it!)
Thoughtfulness/Thinking -Steepling fingers (I will think better if I center myself and focus.) -Pinching nose, sometimes with closed eyes (Focus, focus—I just need to focus.) -Tugging on an ear (This will help me remember!) -Stroking a real or imaginary beard (People with beards look smart.) -Furrowed brow, narrowed eyes, sometimes tilted head and pressing lips together (I can’t see it—I will try harder!) -Resting his chin on his hand (Thinking makes my head heavy.)
Triumphant -Hands clenched and held above head while grimacing (She is invincible!) -Head tilted back with a yell (She is fierce!) -Arm pumping in the air, jumping (Woohoo!)
the essentials of writing FIGHT SCENES!
I realized that there weren’t a lot of fight scene tutorials on here that addressed a lot of the common mistakes of fight scenes. I have a non-zero amount of experience with Krav Maga and have been told I’m very good with fight scenes so I thought I might as well write out a little advice
Keep in mind that this is best suited to “nasty hand to hand street fighting” and even then there are probably better people to ask about it. But here goes.
What’s the One Important Thing I’d have you remember?
Best piece of fight scene advice I’ve ever heard: Violence is fast. Whenever people are involved in some kind of accident or tragedy, what they say is “It happened so fast!” So no matter what, think fast. The main mistake I see with fight scenes is unrealistic description, and it comes from a lack of understanding of a fight being a very altered state of consciousness, where your character is at the limits of their ability to process shit. So:
How to Describe a Fight Scene!
The Language: Go for the strongest verbs you can find and use them. Think slam, crash, smash, pound, grind, shove, ram, claw, rip, gouge, bash…You want very verb driven writing. This is the time to pull out that thesaurus and that list of 500 verbs to use in writing or whatever. Don’t let adjectives and adverbs carry the weight. “She punched him hard in the gut” needs to be “She slammed a fist into his gut.” Or better, let the fist be the subject: “Her fist slammed in his gut.” If there’s any time to adhere hardcore to active voice, it’s now. Also notice that I shortened “into” to “in”- it’s best to go with language that’s as short and well, punchy, grammar be damned. This is also why I go with “gut” rather than “stomach.” Sentence fragments and em-dashes and such are your friends. Cut out articles and conjunctions wherever you can. And try to keep the subject and verb of every action close together–it’s much more direct and better able to connote that intense aggression that you want.
So, you might have something like this: “As she tried to throw a punch at his face, he dodged aside, moving in, his body twisting, to kick her in the ribs.”
You might notice the following issues: The verbs are fairly weak- tried, moving. “Dodged” is good but the others fall flat. There are a lot of extraneous words. And the clause at the beginning makes the sentence feel too indirect.
So these are the changes I would make: “Her fist darted for his face. He dodged aside. Slipped closer, twisted–his heel crashed into ribcage.”
That’s the technical stuff out of the way. Now for some more general advice on fights:
In a fight, you really don’t think. There are two things your brain can do: percieve and respond. In such an adrenaline-fueled survival situation, you’re a bundle of instinctive reaction and OHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCK. A skilled fighter doesn’t mentally remember techniques, the techniques are just the first response that springs out at an attack because they’re second nature. And the thing is, you CAN’T remember techniques in the fight. Adrenaline makes you big stupid. Brain is a faraway land, but body is here, in danger, and trying to stay alive. This is what I mean by your character being at the limits of their processing—they have very little room to think because they’re in survival mode.
That’s why you practice techniques One Fuckthousand Times in martial arts. It’s actually wild how little conscious thought there is to it. I’m always going to remember the time when I, a smol orange belt, was sparring with a larger guy and his fist was flying at my face and I just…wove underneath it. Without even thinking. Pure instinct. I had two guys like, beaming at me and pounding me on the back at the breakthrough but I was confused at the time because it felt like a complete accident. So what you should get out of this is—yeah, no internal monologue! Write what your character perceives and write what they respond.
Description of any kind, but especially visual description, will be highly fragmented. If your character is in a fight with another character, they’re not going to be extensively perceiving their surroundings and noticing the thick curtains of ivy on the walls or whatever. Their focus will be. On the fight. Part of the reason for this is that adrenaline makes you focus hard on threats and kind of cancels out irrelevant data. I want to point out visual description specifically as an area of concern though because for one thing, your field of view is going to be limited as you try to protect your head and face, you’re going to need to pay attention to your aggressor and anticipate their next move, and finally, if you get punched in the face or have anything come close to hitting you there you’re going to be blinded temporarily because you’ll instinctively shut your eyes. NO SCENERY! If your character’s getting pummeled in the face they’re probably not noticing the vicious gleam in their adversary’s eyes outside of a quick glimpse. Imagine the whole thing is being filmed through a panicking amateur’s shaky camera.
Hone in hard on your character’s body in your descriptions. They’re inhabiting their body in a super intense way and most of your description will probably lean toward the tactile. This not only includes the awareness of pain or of being hit, but also the movement and coordination of their muscles and how they are working together, their breathing, potentially exhaustion or fatigue. Martial arts allows you to experience how your body produces force—to percieve the flow of power through your entire torso that culminates in a punch. This feeling can add a lot to a description of a fight. A punch or a kick’s power doesn’t come from muscular strength of your limbs, but originates throughout your body and the ability to coordinate that and draw it together into a single hard point of power involves a lot of consciousness of your body, which also becomes second nature.
Almost the entirety of your character’s focus will be firmly in their body. They are perceiving their adversary’s movements, but that is sharply edged with their own reactions to them.
I feel like people often don’t realize how intense taking a hit in a fight can be. A punch to the face or head is blinding and dizzying; taking a hit to the temple will snap your head aside and put you completely out of it for a second. Descriptions of these things need to be very grounded and intense to feel right. Getting hit in the chest hard enough can knock the wind out of you. Getting hit in the gut WILL make you retch or throw up. A hard kick to the gut is like instant vomit. (There’s another post with really excellent descriptions about what certain blows feel like so I’ll leave this at that.)
Your character will perceive pain, both the force of the blow they take and a sense of the scale or breadth of the pain, but adrenaline will keep them going through it to a degree that isn’t possible when not pumped full of adrenaline. Your character will probably know that they’ve been injured (oh fuck, that was a nasty hit to the side) but AFTER the fight, expect the real pain to suddenly hit (oh fuck, there’s a giant bruise over my side and it’s aching so deep I can barely move).
Adrenaline makes you straight up loopy sometimes. Y’all know how much I hate anecdotal evidence, but one of my former instructors told a story about how he was mugged, got slammed against the sidewalk and briefly blacked out, fought back, and then just…decided to go to work. He thought he was fine. A few hours later, paramedics were asking him questions and he was completely incoherent. He had a severe concussion but the adrenaline rush had caused a delay in the damage really hitting, to the point that he was just like “heh, I can go straight to work, I’m fine!”
Some general facts:
A fight is probably going to be over pretty quickly: Movies are deceptive about this but it’s not super realistic to have two characters tangling with each other for like…ten minutes straight. You get tired. You get sloppy. And there’s only so much damage you can take.
Fancy kicks not recommended: They look nice on screen, sure. But having your leg above your waist for any length of time is one hell of a risk when your opponent can grab it and slam you to the floor like a sack of concrete mix. HOWEVER, kicks can be fight enders. A heel kick will break ribs easily.
Dirty fighting: This is the Kravist in me, but knees to the groin are valid and will completely immobilize a testicle-having attacker. Elbows are also highly destructive, but you tend not to see them in movie fights much. Biting is valid and bites can be very nasty. Gouging eyes is very effective. It’s also easier than you would think to rip the skin off someone’s face with your nails if you’re already going feral. A good punch to the throat might end a fight.
Blocking or dodging blows: Your character can deflect a punch or a knife attack to the upper body with forearms, and your arms will cushion a blow to the head as well. You can also duck your head around an attempted blow to the face. It’s important, though, to think of your two characters’ actions as interlocking rather than alternating—a character going in for a hit will at least briefly have one of their limbs extended instead of protecting the body, and the other character will be taking that opening. Have them dodge the blow and slide into their own opportunity in a single movement.
Shit Happens: A fight is not an equation where you plug in the size and weight of both adversaries and get the result. Again, this is the Kravist in me, but the only law is Murphy’s law. An attempt to land a blow can go sour and break somebody’s wrist. An attacker can trip and fall. Puddles and improvised weapons and getting blood or sweat in your eyes can all be wild cards. An experienced fighter can get fucked up by someone smaller and less experienced than they because of luck. That said, though, experience is what helps you adapt to the Murphy’s-law-ness of everything.
Yeah that’s what I’ve got, enjoy ur violence
Keep The Words Flowing
After reading and viewing dozens of posts about which words to cut while revising fiction, I am making a master list. This does not mean all of these words will or should be completely eradicated from all fiction. Rather, they should be used sparingly, and when they best work in context. Obviously more vibrant verbiage remains recommended, but sometimes, simple is best.
FILTERING WORDS: Separate reader from the MC’s mind or senses:
saw
looked
heard
felt
touch/ed
knew
think/thought
smelled
tasted
believe
noticed
reminded
watched
decided
wondered
seemed
realized
decide
remembered
hoped/hoping
gave
CONDITIONAL WORDS: Filter POV by adding condition/judgement to it.
only
almost
somehow
something
actually
even
now
could
mostly
had
also
CLOGGING WORDS: Basically aren’t needed. Use in small amounts.
Really
Actually
Just
So
A lot
A bit
Always
Never
Very
That
Then
Got
Often
Like
Literally
Virtually
Completely
Suddenly
Entirely
Back (honestly can’t believe how many times I delete this word)
VAGUE WORDS
There
Stuff
Some
Thing
MISLEADING PHRASES
In order to,
For some reason,
As if
One of
How to write a kiss
Rebloggable version, as requested by davrosbro. :)
Oooh! Yes! I love kisses. Kisses are where it all starts ;).
Okay, first, remember that a kiss is much, much more than just lips. It is lips, but also tongues, teeth, eyes, faces, hands, noses, bodies, heartbeats, breath, voice- and most importantly, a kiss is emotions. A kiss without emotion is just wet mushy lips stuck together. Ew. Gross. The most important part of a kiss isn’t the how, but the who- because of the emotions between the two people.
Okay so:
lips- Lips can slide, glide over each other smoothly, or they can be chapped and rough and dry and get stuck on each other. They can match, top-to-top and bottom-to-bottom, or they can overlap, with one person’s top or bottom lip captured between the other person’s lips (yummy). If there is lipstick or chapstick there is lipstick or chapstick flavor, otherwise, lips don’t have a taste (can you taste yours?). Lips also can smack- the sound of two of them coming together or pulling apart, because they’re wet and warm and soft.
tongue- Tongues are always wet, and always warm. They’re very versatile. They can trace over lips, teeth, or another tongue. They can be smooth and graceful or teasing and flicking. When tongues are involved, there is drool. It’s only sexy when you like the person you’re kissing, or else it’s kinda gross. :P
teeth- teeth can clack together awkwardly, or teeth can bite down sensually. A person biting their own lip is cute, a person biting another’s lips is sexy. A person biting gently is sensual, a person biting roughly is sexual.
eyes- Eyes can be wide open with surprise, half-lidded with desire, fully closed with pleasure. Eyes can gaze lovingly, lustfully, wistfully, hungrily, seductively- it all depends upon the emotions of your characters. Have them do whatever you like, but don’t leave them out- give them at least a mention!
faces- Faces are what the lips are attached to. Noses bump, cheeks flush, ears turn red, foreheads either wrinkle or relax. Kisses can leave lips, quite easily, and become kisses on chins, cheeks, noses, foreheads, ears, necks, throats. Kisses on noses or foreheads are cute and adorable, kisses on cheeks are sweet, kisses on chins, ears, and throats are very sexual. And a kiss on the lips can be all of those! <3
hands- Hands are super-important. In order to describe a kiss, usually you want to also describe the hands. Where are they? Does one character have their hand behind the other’s head or back, holding them close? Are they on someone’s shoulders pulling them near, or pushing them away? Fingers brushing someone’s cheek or palms grabbing someone’s ass convey two very different kinds of situations, even if the kiss itself is exactly the same.
noses- Noses are annoying. They easily get in the way, especially for first kisses! People have to tilt their head to one side or the other, and if they don’t, noses bump. I’d only mention noses if a kiss is supposed to be awkward or uncertain or nervous.
bodies- bodies are either close together, or far away. Someone can be surrounded comfortingly by someone’s arms, or terrifyingly trapped by them. Bodies are warm or hot, they are calm or nervous, relaxed or tense. Body language says a lot. Is your character pulling away, or moving closer?
heartbeat- Hearts can beat fast or slow, and that’s about all they can do- but there are lots of reasons why they do! A heart can beat fast with fear or excitement or nervousness; a heart can pound with lust or race with terror or sing with joy. Hearts can glow, cower, or shatter. When you really want to drive the emotions of a character home, mention the heart.
breath- To me, the most consuming part of a kiss is the breath. The air that someone else has just breathed going deep into your lungs is very intimate. Lips and tongues don’t have a taste, but breath does. Each person’s breath tastes different, smells different, and surrounds a person differently than anyone else’s breath. Breath can be warm and sweet, breath can be hot and sexy, breath can be hot and frightening. It is something that is very present and should not be left out. A lot of writers leave breath out. And it’s so important; it’s the most intimate part of a kiss. Someone else is breathing into your lungs, and it’s either heaven or it’s hell.
voice- Voice conveys much, even without words. A voice can groan, whimper, gasp, moan, catch, whine, scream, sigh. Voice can convey emotion powerfully, and while some kisses are silent, usually they’re not.
emotion- Emotion is the most important- and the thing you try not to say. You want to describe it, through all of the things above, so that it’s perfectly clear what your characters are feeling, without you ever using the “feelings words”. If they’re in love, their bodies will lean close, their eyes will smile, their voices will giggle softly. If they’re nervous, their palms will sweat, their noses will bump, their voices will shudder. If they’re afraid, their muscles will be tense, their faces will grimace, their lips will not open. Emotion is the color that you keep inside your mind as you write; it’s the base line that drives the description behind everything else you say.
Wow, that was a lot! Gosh I hope it wasn’t too much! Keep in mind not every kiss has all these things- this is just a list of things to consider when writing a kiss, and based on how long of a kiss you want to make. Keep in mind that typing “they kissed for a long time”…that’s six words, it takes half a second to read, so that’s a short kiss! If you want a long kiss, you need long sentences that make the reader linger.
So maybe to start off, pick three things on the list to describe in your first kiss. Don’t try to do it all- that would be too much for even the most epic kiss. Just pick what’s most important to this particular scene, to these particular characters, and describe those parts along with the lips, and you’ve got yourself an awesome, emotional kiss. <3