Their Reactions To Seeing Your Selfharm Scars For The First Time

their reactions to seeing your selfharm scars for the first time

prompt: “you didn’t expect them to burst into your dorm room so suddenly.”

includes: eijirou kirishima, katsuki bakugo

word count: 1.1k

warnings: TW!!! self harm in the form of cutting, some light swearing, mention of depression, mental health struggles

 a/n:!!! HEY EVERYONE !!! i owe you a big, fat, apology, which i, sadly, cannot offer you. yes, i disappeared off of tumblr for a good few months with no other excuse that my mental health had gone to shit and i couldn’t write anything good. so whilst i work on the asks that have (kind of) piled up, have these short headcannons.

eijirou kirishima

it was saturday evening

you had told your boyfriend that you were planning on staying in bed and watching netflix all evening

which you did!!

but not because you enjoyed it

you had been stuck in bed, only getting out to attend classes

no matter how desperately you wanted to meet up with your friends and hang out with them, your depression held you back.

so now you ended up in this endless loop of feeling worthless you weren’t doing anything, but having no energy to do anything

your last resort was harming yourself

it felt like the only thing in your life that you had any control over

even just remotely

you felt you needed the feeling of control, expecting to feel better after you did it

which was never the case

so here you were again, saturday evening, hunched over your sink, blood dripping down your arm into it

kirishima had said he was going to go on a party tonight, so the last thing you expected was hearing your dorm room open, shortly followed by the footsteps of eijirou approaching your bathroom

“y/n?”

you froze, frantically trying to rinse the blood away and pull your sweater down

you then turned to him, hoping you were fast enough, but judging by his face, it was far too late

“k-kiri.. i-”

you didn’t get to finish what you wanted to say - not that you had an excuse prepared anyway - because he pulled you into a hug

“i’m so sorry i didn’t realise this sooner.” was all he said before pulling away, hands on your shoulders

“will you please let me see?”

your eyes filled with tears, your heart filling with regret upon hearing the shakiness in his voice, nodding your head slightly

he then gently pulled your sleeves up, letting out a soft sigh but without wasting any more time reaching for the first aid kit, pulling out some stuff to wrap you up

you didn’t speak, too afraid to say the wrong thing  in this moment

when he was done, he pulled you to your bed and laid down on it, pulling you down with him and hugging  you

you finally loosened up that moment, all emotions taking over you and you proceeded to just cry into his chest

he just tightened his arms around you and let you cry it out 

“i don’t know what drove you to do this, but i’m sorry i couldn’t be there for you.”

you immediately shook your head

“don’t apologise, ei.  you couldn’t have known. it’s my fault for not reaching out-”

he immediately shushed you 

“what we’re not going to do is blame ourselves for something that none of us could prevent, alright? what we’re going to do is work on getting you better, okay? i can’t stand seeing my baby in pain.”

you sniffled and simply nodded

you better believe he kept his word when he said he wanted to help you get better.

katsuki bakugou

unlike kirishima, katsuki actually knew that you had been struggling with depression

he just didn’t know about the selfharm part

but nonetheless, check-ups on you when you went silent for a few days weren’t rare.

today was one of those not-so-rare days, in which all you could do was wait around until the day was over

as far as you were aware, katsuki was meeting kirishima in the city today, which was why you weren’t expecting a check-up today

so, just as you were walking out of the bathroom after harming yourself again, you were surprised to hear a knock on the door

“oi, it’s katsuki. you in there, y/n?”

fuck

you were lucky you just finished cleaning up

“y-yeah! come in, kats” you proceeded to call out, sitting down on your unmade bed

he barged in, permanent scowl on his face

“i told you to open the windows every once in a while, didn’t i?”

he scoffed, opening said window, so some fresh air finally found its way inside

he then finally looked at you, furrowing his brows

“you look more tired than usual. what happened?” he asked, voice noticeably softer than before

you instantly shook your head

“nothing happened... i just didn’t get enough sleep, that’s all.”

he sighed, dropping the subject and nodding

“okay then. i’m staying the night tonight.”

“uh, excuse me? aizawa might literally kill you-”

he shrugged and laid down on the bed, hand in one hand, the other arm sprawled out

he always claimed it was just comfy but you knew it was always a silent invitation to cuddle

and you were not about to pass up that opportunity

you laid down on his arm, obviously

considering it was kinda late already, and the fact that you had been crying prior to katsuki’s arrival, you felt your eyes grow heavy nearly immediately

he was just scrolling through his instagram feed so it was silent for the most part, only chatter from the outside of your dorm sometimes audible

yes, you didn’t take long to fall asleep

also yes, katsuki was very worried - he knew something was up but he couldn’t pinpoint what exactly

he tried shrugging it off, putting his phone away and also trying to sleep

although he struggled a little, he managed to fall asleep

not for long though,

for some unexplainable reason he woke up at 4am, sighing and sitting up

he knew he would no longer be able to fall asleep again, saving himself the torture of turning 294 times in bed to no avail and grabbing his phone 

before he could open any app he furrowed his brows, feeling something damp on his arm

he used the light from his phone to check

and it was blood

that had his eyes widening 

he immediately looked at your sleeping form, eyes scanning over your figure until they stopped at your arm, a gasp escaping his mouth at the sight of your sleeve being covered in blood

“y/n, get up, you’re bleeding.”

he tried his best to hide how hurt he was 

you peeled your eyes open, whining a little before registering what he said 

“i’m what?”

“you’re bleeding.”

you immediately looked down at your arm, cursing under your breath

fuck.

he wasn’t meant to find out

especially not like this

when you didn’t make a move to get up, he sighed and pulled you out of bed himself

he dragged you to the bathroom wordlessly and pulled your stained hoodie off of you

he cleaned your wounds and patched you up

when he was finished, he pulled you into a hug

a hug

the last thing you expected

you expected everything

you expected him to yell, maybe even blow things up out of anger

but he wordlessly hugged you

“i’m sorry i wasn’t there to help you earlier.”

but he was there to help now, and he sure did.

requests: open

read rules before requesting.

hi, i just wanna say i really love the way u write kenma!! 💞💞

ahhh!!!!! thank u SM!! <333

sorry, my mental health's been shit. i'll try to publish something tomorrow <3

alright lads, just published two (!!) drabbles and it’s nearly 4am so i’m logging off, goodnight !! <3

i just finished an aizawa shoto mini-drabble and i’m about to work on an oikawa one! :D which one should i post first??

꒰ fly little bird ; akaashi keiji ꒱

꠴ pairing. akaashi keiji x figure skater!reader.

꠴ synopsis. as competitions are approaching, you’re trying to perfect a certain move. all the while, your friend is trying to find just the way to confess his feelings for you.

꠴ word count. 9.1k words.

꠴ fic contents. friends to lovers!au, ice skating!au, fluff, mutual pining, insecure reader that constantly beats herself up, bird references bro, reader’s personality: figure skating, reader may be referred to as ‘birdie’ or ‘little bird.’

꠴ a word from the author. this fic for the babes, @cafemiya, and this is my final repost of my old fics. im sorry yall :((

In school they teach about basic life cycles, typically starting out with a butterfly. It’s supposed to teach children the process of life and how it works, explaining the maturity in animals rather than humans because that’s a discussion to talk about when they’re more mature and older. Whatever way you take it, it all boils down to how life goes in a circle. Where life is given, death is soon to follow.

You’ve always been compared to a little bird. You can’t quite understand why, but the nickname ‘Birdie’ tends to follow you wherever you go.

The life cycle of a bird is simple. Doesn’t matter what type because it all starts with an egg being laid by the mother and then being nurtured in healthy conditions in order to hatch. And when those little birds do hatch, they’re taken care of and being nursed before they can face the sky. Despite the wings they’ve been blessed with at birth, they’re taught to fly through reinforcement driven by the mother. 

Watching the chicks closely, the ugly animals are nudged from their spots of safety to their imposing fall. The mother bird forces their children to take this risk and have them make the decision to either fall and let gravity take over or learn how to spread and flap their wings. 

At first, you thought this was a cruel way to teach these poor animals. However, how else would they learn? The same way a baby learns, they must tumble and learn from their mistakes as they keep pushing themselves. That’s the only way to keep going.

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