The Mind Numbing Anger Of Chronic Fatigue Is Getting Irritable Because You're So Fucking Tired But You

The mind numbing anger of chronic fatigue is getting irritable because you're so fucking tired but you really feel like you SHOULDNT BE.

You SHOULD be able to sit at a desk and do work. You SHOULD be able to just watch a freaking YouTube video. You SHOULD be able to just eat fucking lunch.

But you can't. Because your eyes are closing and it's like temporary death is taking you.

This is living 💙

Whew, I’ve really been debating whether I should make this post or not, but I’ve decided that it is my civic duty as a fellow cyster to bring awareness and maybe help others understand or even recognise the symptoms and what it means to have PCOS

I could hit you guys with all the official terms and statistics, but I will let the pictures do the talking on that

I personally just thought that I should share my story and how I got diagnosed with PCOS, and how I’ve been managing since then

So, I got my first period when I was 10. Which is quite early, but it never really bothered me. I always had a very regular menstrual cycle, from the number of days I menstruated, to the length of each phase.

Well, that all stopped when I was almost 19. My periods stopped being regular, I even went 3 whole consecutive months without even ovulating once. I was always irritated, I gained a lot of weight, my skin was horrible and I just wasn’t really on top of my game in general.

But I just kept telling myself that everything would be fine. I floated through 2 years of my life without knowing if I would be getting my period each month. I didn’t understand why I was always so hormonal and I kind of started hating myself.

So this year, in the very beginning of july, now at the big old age of 21, I decided to go to the OBGYN. I was honestly scared shitless, but I was trying to gaslight myself into thinking that it would be all fine. Except it ended up not being all fine. Because I got diagnosed with PCOS.

Now, I don’t know about other OBGYNs, but mine didn’t particularly care to explain stuff to me, just gave me my papers and told me to get a bunch of tests done to find out my root cause. My regular doctor just gave me a pamphlet for dieting with diabetes/IR and basically told me to just figure things out on my own.

I think it’s honestly disgusting how little healthcare professionals seem to care about a condition that affects so many afab people. There isn’t a cure, because nobody cares to find a cure.

Well, they should.

Everyone should.

Living with PCOS isn’t easy. I have mental breakdowns about it on the weekly. I hate having to restrict what I can eat so much.

And I hate that it is worth it. I hate that I actually feel better when I don’t eat dairy, I hate that I actually feel awful physically when I eat carbs. It’s not fair.

And I hate that my sickness affects the most important (to me) aspect of my life: my fertility.

I have never not wanted children. Becoming a mother is the biggest dream I had since I was a kid. It’s my life purpose. And I might not ever get it.

But I can’t let my PCOS rule my life. I am me, first and foremost. Chronic illness or not.

And I really hope that every woman struggling with PCOS can look into the mirror at the end of the day and find beauty in what she sees.

You are beautiful.

You are strong.

You are loved.

people don't understand just how fucking validating it is to have someone at your job finally understand your chronic illness, know what you are going through, give you advice on it, and actually help you. I am so used to advice that does nothing and puts a bandaid on a broken arm and I don't understand how I feel right now.

If you missed Intersex Awareness Day yesterday, don’t worry! You can still share this phenomenal infographic made by our youth advocate @hannlindahl! Thank you so much for all the work you do for the intersex community, Hann! We are so proud of you!