Admiral, The General Is Touch-deprived.

Admiral, the general is touch-deprived.

✧ jing yuan x gn!reader

✧ based on the ask: "Please do one if you haven’t where Jing Yuan is severely down bad for reader and makes it known to everyone and they are just done with him"

✧ content: established relationship, fluff, make-out scene, humor, mentions of other characters

✧ a/n: where did almost 100 of you come- bless this ask for making me write needy jing yuan i love you. not beta-read again anyway buckle up this is another one of unfiltered shame for my love for one mere general with a silly thunder lord that he nicknamed shin-kun in the jp dub because the official title was way too long for this old man.

this was written in a google doc on the phone since I'm on vacation so I apologize if the formatting is messier than the first post 🫡

There's tension in the air.

"... As for Stargazer Navidia, there seems to be another onslaught of mara-struck cloud knights making their way within the area in the next few days. I'll appoint Lieutenant Yanqing to lead a few troops there by the next hour, but be sure to send a messenger cycrane if the situation gets too out of hand or you need to divide the troops up to cover more ground."

You hear a loud "Yes!" as you flip over to the next page, quickly scanning through the documents contents, purposefully ignoring the tension in the air, muttering the details lowly to yourself with a furrowed eyebrow.

It's the sort of tension you wish everyone just ignored, even though it's more difficult than it sounds.

Perhaps being fed up with your avoidance of ignoring the elephant in the room, one of the captains of the Knights loudly cough into the air before meekly addressing you, "Admiral [Name]?"

"Yes?" you look up with a smile, cocking your head to the side. A small gesture to ensure the captain that they have your full attention which makes the knight before you quickly glance to the side and away from you, although that didn't help the pair of eyes boring a hole into the side of his head, "The general…" he starts, coughing once again while glancing back and forth at you and the weapons displayed at the seat of Divine Foresight, "... Would very much like your attention, it seems."

As if on cue, the arms that were wrapped around your waist squeeze a bit tighter than normal. The sudden pressure makes you let out a grunt of surprise while Qingzu lets out another exhausted sigh. Meanwhile you glance down to lock eyes with Jing Yuan, who very much is staring at you with a small pout evident on his lips, "Oh so my darling has finally acknowledged my existence?" he jokes with a grin, meanwhile you merely stare down back at him with a neutral expression before resting your left arm carrying the paperwork on his gray head. The general uses the opportunity to nuzzle his face into your waist, playfully biting into an exposed part of your skin from where his hand had wormed itself underneath your shirt, making you squirm away from him, to which he immediately grabs your back into his hold.

"If you haven't noticed dear, you're practically leeching onto me to the point I can't even stand at my usual side, that is to per say in front of the desk and not literally quite next to you and within your arms." You whisper to him gently. Flicking his forehead before whipping your head around to address the Cloud Knights before your husband can say anything in his defense.

You ignore the looks of disbelief on some of the soldiers' faces.

"I apologize for the awkwardness this position may cause, I can only hope for your understanding being that I've been away from the Luofu for a few months helping Marshal Fua with some matters at her fleet. I've only recently come back." you explain, gesturing Qingzu over to hand over the paperwork to her before waving your hand with a guilty smile, "You're all dismissed, please be safe out there."

"Lady Fu Xuan, how may I be of assis-"

"Are you two arguing or something?" Fu Xuan interrupts before you can even finish your sentence which leaves you staring wide eyed at her with your mouth agape, "Pardon? I'm not quite sure who you're referring to-"

"The general. I'm referring to general Jing Yuan, who else would I be referring to? He sits around the seat of Divine Foresight like a kicked puppy. Which makes it even harder to get any information in OR to him because he's not even mentally present! Can you fix him? Wonderful! Let's make haste to the seat."

You're not even allowed to finish your cup of tea or give an answer before the divination commissioner grabs you by the forearms and drags you out of the teahouse.

"Jing-" you haven't even taken one step into the seat of Divine Foresight before you're surrounded by the familiar scent of your husband. A gentle hand placed by your head while an arm is tightly wound around your waist. You can practically feel the smile of utter glee on Jing Yuan's lips as he buries his face into your hair.

"Darling, I thought you had the day off today?" he mutters into your hair, sounding a bit too happy to have you in his arms again to the point he's ignoring the death glares from Fu Xuan besides you, the divination commissioner just wanting to do her part of keeping the Luofu afloat.

"I was having my day off, before Lady Fu Xuan here dragged me out because someone didn't-" you struggle free to nag at him, but your husband merely smiles softly at you before lifting your chin to give you a quick kiss, "Now that you're here I feel more energized than ever, let me finish the paperwork for today and I'll join you, we can even play a round of starchess." he suggests.

You can practically sense Fu Xuan roll her eyes in disgust, able to hear her mutter about a "lovesick fool" before walking past the two of you, Jing Yuan merely grabbing your hand to lead you towards the seat.

So much for a day off.

You can't breathe.

"Jing-" another press of his lips onto yours as you find yourself pressed on the wall beside the door, "Yanqing-" you manage to breathe out when finally able to pull a tiny bit away from him. Pressing your hand over whatever surface of his face you can reach to try to shove him away, your other hand occupied with bracing itself against the wall.

Your husband ignores your literal hand on his face, somehow having more strength to still slant his lips across your own despite your efforts, the hand he has behind your head pushing you further against him while he shoves a leg between your own to keep you still, "Train-"

There's a rather loud set of knocks on your bedroom door followed by an exasperated sigh coming from behind it, which makes you freeze but Jing Yuan ignores it, sliding his tongue over your teeth while you resign yourself to slam your fist repeatedly on his back to get him to back off.

"General! I know you missed [Name] a lot during the months they were away from the Luofu, but you know that today is supposed to be a training day!" Yanqing shouts from behind the door, and you feel sorry over the realization he's aware of what's happening beyond it.

Feeling sorry enough for Yanqing whose probably already waited 15 minutes before knocking at the door, you muster whatever little strength you have left against your husband's addictive lips to grab his ponytail and yank him off and away from you.

Jing Yuan merely grunts in irritation, looking at you with a glare and swollen lips, but you ignore him. Opening the door before Jing Yuan can grab you again and giving Yanqing an apologetic look, "I tried-"

"It's better than last time, at least." He points out to which you merely sigh before opening the door wider, "I'll give you more pocket money this month, how's that for compensation?" You suggest, shoving your husband out the door before he do anything else, Yanqing smiling in triumph at your generosity.

"You're the best! Give me extra if I manage to land a few hits on the general?"

"5 more than usual and I'll give you an extra thousand." You settle, tapping Jing Yuan on the shoulder. Your husband turns around to face you with a hum, and you lean in to peck him on the cheek, gliding your lips over to his ear, "If you're a bit nicer to him today you'll also get a reward."

Needless to say, there were two very happy boys onboard the Luofu at the end of the day.

Look, Don't Touch

Gojo Satoru x Female Reader

Warnings: Major DUBCON, pervert Satoru, somnophilia, jerking off, whiny, whimpering, need Satoru.

A/N: this is literally a dream I had so naturally here it is in written form... hehe

WORD COUNT: 2,148 | Not proof read (forgive me)

“Sa-to-ru '' you drawl slowly, giggling as he only whines in response. “I can walk ya know, Sa-to-ru~” but the man refused to put you down, carrying bridal style down the streets of Tokyo with your apartment as his end destination. “Stop talking.” But there was no malice in his tone, he was just getting antsy, and it was all your fault. 

You had been teasing him relentlessly, in the club, at the bar, even now as he carried you home. You weren’t even that bad off but he still didn’t trust you to walk by his side if he set you down. Given the fact that Satoru himself had a couple drinks, he was in no state to chase after you. “Never, you know you love the sound of my voice, Sa-to-ru.”

He did, and the way you drew out his name was sending shrills of need down his spine.

“You’re so mean to me… so fucking cruel.” He whined, not caring how desperate he sounded as he rounded the next corner. “You love how mean I am to you, makes you hard, huh?” You whispered the last part in his ear, giggling softly as you felt him tremble. “So cruel.” was all Satoru could mutter in response, nearly crumbling when your building was in sight. 

“Tell ya what, Sa-to-ru.” You started, head swaying a bit before you decided to rest it on his shoulder. He didn’t answer, trying to ignore your hand gently trialing across the broad plains of his chest. You could feel his heart racing, it excited you to no end. “C’mon, answer me.” You pouted, fingers still trailing along his chest before finding your way to his neck. 

“Go ahead…” his voice strained as he spoke “...Tell me what you want to say.” He knew he’d regret it, the moment you shimmied in his grasp so your lips could ghost his ear. “If you can remember the code to my apartment, I’ll let you spend the night.” You laughed softly as he sighed. “I don’t need a place to sleep, sweetheart.” He tried to sound uninterested but dammit…

“Not to sleep, silly boy.” You teased him further, dragging your nail under his chin and watching him try and fight off the shiver that it sent through his whole body. You watched his throat bob, the grip he had on your body tightening a bit. “I wanna play with you.” You whined softly, legs kicking a bit where they dangled in his grasp. 

“Play with me?” he huffed out, legs carrying him quickly as you spoke. “Yeah, wanna play with your co–” but he cut you off with a choked “Woah!” which only made you laugh harder. “Sorry, Sa-to-ru. The drinks make me feel more than I should.” But the white haired man only shook his head, if he spoke he was certain his restraint would go out the window. 

He wasn’t mad nor was he uncomfortable. Quite the fucking opposite, he was seconds away from taking you up on your drunken offers. He was shouldering the glass double doors open, ignoring any glances the two of you may get by any passersby. He knew your apartment code just like he knew your phone number, he spent enough time over at your place to know. 

“So what you’re telling me…” he clicked the button for your floor as he stepped into the elevator, strong enough to hold you with one hand as he did so. “... you’ll let me fuck you if I remember your apartment code?” He finally smirked down at you, trying not to chuckle at your lidded eyes and smeared lipstick. “Mmhmm, thats exactly what you can do… fuck me really good.” 

His moment of confidence fizzled away at your tone, so seductive, so needy. 

Fuck he wanted you bad… 

By the time the elevator door opened, Satoru was uncomfortably hard. It was the only thing he could truly focus on, the way his cock was stiff in his boxers, straining against the material and slowly leaking. Every step sent shivers up his spine, the material brushing his sensitive cock just right as he stopped in front of your door. “You better know it, Sa-to-ru.”  

Your words had begun to slur from a mix of alcohol and exhaustion, you could feel your own arousal dampening your underwear but you had a funny feeling you wouldn’t even be awake by the time he got you in bed. It took three seconds for him to type your code, door clicking to signal it had been unlocked. “Ha…” soft and triumphant as he pushed his way inside. 

You had been right of course, Satoru hadn’t bothered looking down at you again until he was moving to place you on your plush mattress. “No way…” he choked as he set you down, your eyes shut and chest evening out as you began to snore softly. “Such a fucking tease…” he whined, he should have expected you to pass out. He could feel his own exhaustion the entire walk here…

But you had worked him up so well that his tiredness was long forgotten. Now all Satoru could think about was the aching hard-on he had in his pants. “You’re lucky I’m a gentleman.” He mumbled to you despite you not being able to hear, carefully taking off the shoulders of your dress and pulling it down your body. He would only undress you and tuck you in, that's it. 

At least that was what the rational portion of his mind was saying, the other part was starting to lose its cool at the sight of your bare skin. “You’re so fucking perfect.” Satoru muttered again, trying to restrain himself as he pulled off your pantyhose to toss into the hamper as well. Your panties had dragged down a bit with it, revealing soft skin that made him salivate. 

“This is a form of torture.” he whined, moving to place you up against your pillows. He admired the way you looked, peacefully asleep in nothing but a lacy bra and panties… teasing him thoroughly even in your sleep. The thing is, Satoru couldn’t seem to pull himself away, not even to pull the blankets up and give you some modesty. His feet were glued to his spot on the floor. 

“You… you wouldn’t mind, right? Surely you would understand…” he babbled softly, hands moving to hook in the waistband of your underwear. “Just… just to look. I won’t touch…” His breathing stuttered as your cunt was revealed to him, so soft looking and utterly perfect. Satoru’s cock twitched, reminding him of what he really needed. 

Large, warm hands were spreading your thighs, revealing the sticky, shiny arousal coating your pretty cunt, leaving Satoru’s throat dry. “Fuck…” he was shaking as he undid his pants, pulling them off completely and letting them drop to the floor before stepping out of them. His boxers followed, slightly soiled from his precum dampening the front. 

Satoru was careful, climbing onto your bed and sitting on his knees. You laid before him, fast asleep with your legs spread and cunt out in the open. That was more than enough for him, fuck was it more than enough for him. Satoru’s fist wrapped around his shaft ,giving it a hard squeeze, whining lowly as his pretty eyes locked on your cunt. 

Carefully, he tugged at himself, collecting spit in his mouth to drool down over his length. “You’d be such a fucking tease right now, huh?” he spoke to you, hand moving faster now that his saliva was acting as lubricant. “Bet you’d be telling me how bad you want my dick, huh?” he groaned out, his free hand reaching down to fondle his balls as he watched arousal leak from your cunt. 

“Fuck you’re so cute… even your fucking cunt is cute…” his lips twitched, cheeks flushing pink as he spoke those words to you. Dirty talk was never his forte… unless he was alone… or in this case, the other party was sleeping. He could never say the things he imagined when the other person was present. He could only fantasize about the things he would like to do. 

“I wanna eat your pussy so bad… you’re so mean for falling asleep on me…” 

Satoru whimpered as he thumbed his slit, collecting the precum and massaging it around his sensitive tip. “Fuck it looks so good… wanna bury my face down there and eat you out…” he gasped, squeezing his balls so tight he nearly doubled over from the wave of pleasure that passed through him. “My fist is nothing compared to your pussy…” he drawled out now… cheeks flushed red as his pleasure only grew with his words. 

“Bet you’d feel so good, your nails digging in my hair and keeping me there…” he could feel his mouth water, the thought of going down on you was going to have him blowing his load before he was ready too. “You probably taste so good, fuck I want to eat you out so bad…” he whined, brows creasing as he repeated his desires, his fist gliding up and down his shaft in fluid motions. 

Your thighs twitched in your sleep, threatening to close but Satoru’s hand shot out and stopped you. “A-almost done… please let me keep looking at your pretty pussy… almost done I swear…” but you had long since relaxed again, and his fingers had found their way back to his cock head. Satoru massaged himself, his tip flushed a pretty pink and leaking desperately as he pleased himself to the sight of your cunt. “So good… but your hands would be so much better than mine.” 

He was going to cum, he knew he was, he could feel his cock twitching in his grasp as he whimpered about how badly he needed you. “So cruel to tease me and then leave me hanging, especially when your cunt is so pretty and wet for me…” He kept moving, his pleasure building deep in his gut and making his balls tighten. He was going to cum at any second. “You wanted to play with me and now I’m just playing by myself…” Satoru huffed, chest rising and falling faster. 

“You wanted me to play with your pretty cunt and now you’re sleeping… your punishment is not getting off like I’m about to… but still.” He whimpered as he thumbed his slit again, head falling back momentarily to let out a guttural moan, he certainly knew how to get himself off… but it wasn’t you. Fuck it wasn’t you, your hands, your cunt… “So mean…” he gasped out again. 

Satoru could feel sweat dripping down his brow as his fist pumped along his length over and over, he’d cum soon, so soon, but he didn’t quite want this to end yet. Your cunt looked so inviting, but he wouldn’t dare touch you while you were sleeping. He needed to see your sweet face contort in pleasure when he impaled you on his dick.

“Fuck I want your pussy so bad…"

He could really feel it now, especially with the way his cock was twitching. One glance downward and he knew he wouldn’t last much longer. Blue eyes focused back on your cunt, the idea creeping up his spine and reminding him just how perverted this whole thing was. “You’ll let me cum on your pussy, right? I mean it’s the least you could do…” He wanted to cover your cunt in his release, he wanted to see sticky globs of cum coating your pretty pussy.

“Y-yeah… no better place…” He mumbled, tugging his fist faster as his cock felt heavy in his own grasp, twitching and aching to spill his release. So he scooted closer, pulling your body closer to him as he did so. His cock was hovering just above your cunt now, the heat teasing him as he pumped himself closer and closer to his end. “Gonna cum…fuck I’m gonna cum all over this pretty pussy… so fucking mean.. You’re so mean… so fucking mean…”

He whimpered out, over and over as his eyes squeezed shut. Thick ropes of cum spurted from his head, covering your cunt in sticky white. Satoru didn’t stop, hand moving up and down his length over and over even as the pleasure turned into overstimulation. Whimpers and moans fell from his pretty lips as he watched his cum leak down your cunt and pool just under your ass.

“Ruined your sheets…” Satoru spoke to himself, still incredibly turned on by the sight of your cunt covered in his release. “A-again.. You wouldn’t mind if I did it again…” His cock hadn’t softened after all, still stiff and aching in his palm despite dumping a load on you. “You just drive me crazy… you and that cunt…” He whined, fist already moving again while you slept

Gojo could feel the tips of his finger tingle, the sole of his feet itching to move. His mind reels, a thousand thoughts running that it makes his stomach sick. Gojo stands, sits, then stands again until he couldn’t take it anymore. The only thing that grounds him is the sound of your voice, though its the sole reason he’s going insane in the first place.

Gojo has his phone tucked between his cheek and his shoulder, his hand on his hip while the other pinches the bridge of his nose. You’re on the other side, talking about shirt sizes, about which would fit best. And the fact you’re so casual about the whole ordeal despite the betrayal you did him dirty with not even a few days ago pisses him off.

You chose Geto’s side over his. To Gojo that is the highest degree of hurt you could ever inflict on him. And you dared call him dramatic the first minutes of the call!

“I’m gonna go with large,” you said, Gojo can hear shuffling on your end. “I feel like the pair would go well with Suguru too. Don’t you think?”

Gojo’s nose flares, if this was a cartoon he would have steam blowing out of his ears. “I don’t care! And I can’t even see what shirt you’re talking about, you weirdo. Why’d you call me?”

“Cause I missed you. What, I can’t?” Gojo bites down his lower lip, as if it could help calm down the sudden skip of his heartbeat. You have a way with making his emotions go on tangents. “Besides, I haven’t spoken to you in days since I left Tokyo for this mission. How are you doing?”

Gojo doesn’t hold back from telling his truth. “Absolutely horrible, what did you expect? You and Shoko took Suguru’s side, two of my bestest friends not even seeing my side of the story! I was assigned to go on an island with Suguru for a mission, can you imagine how awkward that was for me. Three whole days we were there and we’ve not spoken a word to each other.”

You scoff on the microphone, Gojo can almost sense you rolling your pretty eyes at him. “You did say some mean things to him, Satoru.” He doesn’t like how soft you say his name, that it almost makes him want to do whatever you tell him to. “And what you did was wrong. You have to be the one to apologize to him.” But never that.

“He said mean things to me, too,” Gojo defends. “He called me inconsiderate. I’m plenty considerate!”

“Someone considerate wouldn’t put Inoue Waka as his wallpaper when he has a gorgeous girlfriend who already feels inferior,” You sigh, defeatedly and Gojo knows he’s lost. A pause passes, giving you two both time to breathe. Gojo knows deep in his messed up head you were right. That Geto and Shoko were right. He’s just...he doesn’t know. His ego’s too big to admit he’s wrong, he’s so used to being right. To being on top of everything, he is above everything. He’s still young and learning and forever grateful you’re in his life to call him out on his bullshit, like now.

“Apologize, Satoru,” you said, nearly sounding desperate, tired. “So when I come home I’ll give you the biggest smooch on the cheek and gift you this ugly large shirt as souvenir.” Gojo chuckles at that, agreeing with you. A smile breaking out of his face, the lines of worry disappearing from his forehead.

"Fine, fine. I will," Gojo acquiesces finally.

"Hm, good." You then bless him with a low hearty laugh.

After another beat passes, Gojo tells another truth. “She broke up with me, you know.”

“I– she did?” You don't seem fazed at the sudden shift, if anything you've come to welcome any shift when it came to him.

“Yeah, I kinda deserve it anyway. That was a dick move.”

“Oh, Satoru.” You make no point debunking what he said last, and in it’s own twisted way Gojo knows its for the best. “When did she?”

“Hours after you left,” Gojo said, sitting down now, his head buried in his hand. “Its a long time coming, honestly.”

“How do you mean?”

“It never felt right,” He said. Because she’s not you, he thinks.

“Never felt right?”

“Yeah.” I’m in love with you.

“Hm, I see.” Gojo can feel the sorry dripping from your tone. There was really no need for you to feel anything like that at all. Gojo only felt bad for a day after the break up, then felt more sorry for the fact it only took that much time and he must be such an asshole for being that way and yet... “Don’t you worry, Satoru. I’m sure you’ll find what you’re looking for next time.”

“When you get here.”

“What?”

“I mean, when do you get here?”

“Oh! Uh, my flights later tonight. I’ll be there in the morning.” Gojo doesn’t say anything after that. And for awhile, what he can hear from your end is another person with an accent and you conversing with them in English. You’re probably paying for the stuff you bought. Gojo waits patiently.

When it’s back to faint sounds of your shoes clicking on floors, Gojo asks. “Where are you anyway?”

“In some thrift shop a few blocks from where I’m stationed,” You answer, then quickly add with, "about time you wear things not designer." Because you know he's going to take offense. And he does.

"I can't believe this."

"Listen, this one's—"

"A thrifted shirt? Seriously, I can't—"

"It compliments your eyes! It would look so good on you, trust me."

...

"Well, if you say so. At least tell me it's not the cheapest thing in the store."

"Don't be a pompous jerk, Satoru. You're gonna accept what I give you."

cariño, boy, it’s you i desire eighteen+ content ahead ㅤ⭑ㅤ minors, do not interact. fiancé! nanami kento x fem! reader. ꒰ 4.6k word count ꒱ fluff + the night before the wedding + talks of the future + no bad luck, i promise. smut + fingering + praise + body worship + pussy eating + orgasm control + dom - sub dynamics towards the very end + the discovery of kento’s brat taming abilities (this fic is a trip) + major spit kink because he’s so ♥︎ ! ! oooh

꒰ thnx u note! ꒱ྀི repost · rewrite · i’ll admit, i am a bit delusional for this man. i’ll admit that little, that much abt myself ෆ

“this pink or this blue?” you ask with one-too-many paint samples organized in rows across the dinner table. you, him, and it sharing space with the forgotten take-out from earlier.

two cards the size of your palm are placed side by side in front of him, watching it all come down to ballerina gown and northern star for the bathroom interior of your little fixer-upper.

“pink.” he points, knuckles of his left hand pressed against his cheek “you look beautiful in pink.” nanami then picks up the carton piece with his right and holds it by your face, finding a small pout once he focuses his vision back to you.

“kento, you say that about every color!” your whine elongates the last two words with purpose. to complain, to poke, to tease your future husband.

“you look beautiful in every color.” he emphasizes his words too, finding it harder to stop smiling when he peeks at the ring on your finger— the ring on his future wife.

it’s a little nerve-wrecking having this much free time the night before the wedding but nanami kento is sure to be the sweetest husband.

he's made preparations a year in advance— sending out wedding invitations, booking venue reservations, meeting with the pianist for the early reception and a photographer for a shoot the week before. taking note of everyone you wish to see, adding them onto the guest list, catering of your favorite cuisine— the list never ends.

but it's been an equal effort to make it to this day— you took up the task of finding your perfect florists, setting aside the time to sample the flavors of your wedding cake, (he couldn’t miss this part though. it’s “free” cake!) highlighting menu items made to order at the bar, excited and entertained with themes, colors and wedding table decor— you consider yourself lucky to experience this, to marry him.

because kento's made your engagement such a dream, he never lets you carry more than you can handle, always catching you before you drown in your own worries.

he’s just perfect. no other way to say it. so much so, it becomes intoxicating being around him even if you’re just looking at pretty colors on pieces of cardboard.

when you really think about it, how did it ever become more than that? more than just carton? say, when did he become your new favorite daydream?

“you’re staring at me again,” nanami has a softer gaze on you than he does with anybody else, and even kinder smile he only feels safe giving you entirely, “what’s on your pretty, little mind?” he questions.

“just you.” you give him a funny wink, exaggerated and awkward and slow, it makes you both snort.

“me? again?” he chuckles. being able to love and laugh like this, it warms him up inside more than he could express in words. instead, his face simply glows a little brighter than the sun, hair becoming strands of pure gold.

that’s how you know of his adoration. that’s how you know it’s true.

“when is it ever not you, kento?” the chair squeaks against the tile floor and nanami finds your face breaths away from his. the endings of your bow tied around the waist of your robe dangle beside his fingers at the edge of his chair; temptation begins to whisper in his ear.

“i could say the same thing.” kento’s voice is low, smooth like dripping honey but something within his words hides a pounding want. his eyes aren’t on yours, but on your lips and the way it curves into a smirk when you’ve captured him the way you wanted to.

your thumbs caress the peak of his cheekbones while your leg hoists over and around his hips, settling into his lap with ease. obediently remaining in his chair, kento simply watches the way you move— like ribbons in the wind, like waves in the ocean, he admires you like mother earth does her creations.

“now you’re the one staring at me,” you poke at his cheek but his expressions never change. the smile that reaches his ears and his eyes that seem to look inside you never fade, never fail, never falter. “what is it?”

“nothing,” he says, “i just love you.”

“mmm, love?” the hand that poked his cheek now intertwines with the undone hair that falls and tickles the tip of his ear. they’re a bit pink, you might add, just by having you this close— to say what his heart screams every hour. “i, thump, love, thump, you, thump—

he hums for a second, unearthing the same voice he did when he asked you to marry him. you write it up as the sound of wearing your heart on your sleeve, “it’s love.”

kento’s hands have always been warm. what you imagine a bear paw would feel like in the cold winter: cozy, protective. they find their place on your waist, fuzzy material between his fingers instead of the soft skin he wishes to touch underneath.

you become immovable in his hold, like he’s positive he’s carrying the world in his hands, like you are the answer to every prayer, like he could never possibly let you go.

so, he doesn’t.

he can’t. he can only pull you closer, and when he does, he finds your eyes and your voice already luring him in.

he doesn’t really know what you said if he’s being honest, stuck listening but also not. just that you tugged him in tighter and he doesn’t ever want you to go away, “i love you,” his hands maneuver your hips and tilts you into his lips. a tender kiss, “i love you,” and other, “i really love you.” until it becomes deeper and needier each time he comes back for more, “so much, my girl.”

you can’t tell what’s gotten into him, really. your kento appears to be in a daze, maybe a little lovesick— with it being the night before the wedding, and speaking about the future in this cute little, seaside hotel, you won’t lie— it’s got you in a little daze too, having a beautiful dream.

there’s an ocean breeze coming from the open window in his room. white, hanging curtains filling the silence with little swooshes and wooshes— then it is only you and him watching each other in tranquility and something more.

“ken,” your voice is as soothing as the wind that comes in, “i should go” his hands loop around your waist, his chin rests against your chest, “to my room” eyes never leaving your own, “now.”

“you should,” it comes out as a mumble with the robe in his face, “this was our secret.”

“it was.”

“then, do you want me to let go now?”

“no,” he glows, “never.”

you cup his face, freshly shaven just before bed, the scent of your fabric softener on his white tee— nanami’s left expecting with an open jaw, sneaky lips, and a tongue sneaking out and ready to curl against your own.

“darling,” you speak as the chair squeaks back. kento’s snaked his hands behind your thighs and the curves of your body— hypnotizing you with an unrelenting gaze— it’s just enough for you to slowly realize as he’s carrying you to his bed.

he devotes more of himself to you, if that were even possible, with every kiss he places on your body: think of it as one kiss at the cost of one year of his life— he’s must’ve given you his lifespan by now— he hopes so.

a year gone with the kiss he’s placed on your temple, another with the one by your jaw, and as he lays you down, another three years are gone with the trail he’s created down your neck.

five years of happiness, just like that.

you’re sucked into his world, bathing in his love, swimming in this warmth— the purest thing next to water, god, and himself— but there’s a pause that makes you wonder why he’s suddenly stopped.

“baby, you okay? we don’t have to keep going,” you perk, from laying against feather pillows to sitting upright as nanami settles back the same way.

“do you want to do this?” he asks, uneasy and unsure and most definitely back into his “better” conscious.

maybe he sees your eyes of disbelief or your contorted face of surprise, but nanami grows embarrassed to have behaved so impulsively— how could he?

your smile grows so fast, it’s almost foolish. a childlike smile, followed by a not-so-innocent giggle, “love,” your hands find the robe sash, “come take this off.”

he handles you gently; precious bows, the motion silky as it comes undone— you estimate the seconds it takes for his expression change. when a certain flame in his eye is born, that’s when he finds you in pretty, sheer lace.

note to self: about three seconds for his mind to fog and his mouth to water and his cock to swell.

everything is see-through. everything is see-through? it’s see-through? it’s very much see-through.

what seems like an innocent blouse and a matching skirt becomes his new (and stickiest!) wet dream— lace trim around the edges of both your shirt and your panties, detailed and delicate if he ever decided to touch the edges.

he’s a little jealous on how it hugs your tits so cutely and how your ass must be the same, wishing it were his hands being the ones to roll over and stick to your skin instead. and the sheerness of it all— he can begin to draw out every detail of your body onto his brain, maybe even onto a canvas if he really wanted to show this world true art.

not to mention: he spots the ittiest, bittiest cutest little bow adorned between your breasts. he appreciates the detail, can he unravel it using his teeth? can he fuck you in this another day? can he, please? please?

“you had this all planned out,” baffled, still gazing at your blessed figure, “and expected i’d give in, didn’t you?”

you shrugged off the rest of your robe and tossed it onto the cold tile below. having something else to keep you warm, there’s no use for it anymore!

“i always get what i want, ken,” your left hand begins grazing his right thigh, leg hanging off the edge of the bed with the other tucked underneath him. “you always give it to me!” and you sound so happy saying it.

“are you saying i spoil you too much?” he leans in closer, noses brushing as he sets himself between your legs— between your sheer, little skirt. you can hear a shiver in his breath the wider you spread and when he tries to evenly speak, “should i stop?”

“no,” you tell him, “i think you should spoil me rotten.”

you fall back into those feather pillows as he follows you down as magnets do, legs parting the closer his lips get to your own, both hands intertwining behind his nape.

a short breath leaves his lungs, like a playful hiss followed by a silly grin from his handsome face— he’s spoiling you over and over again, “i was planning on it.”

if he felt short of breath before, nanami feels all the air in his body escape him now. your shared kisses are never quite the same as the ones before; what once was deep and needy now becomes a promise of worship. pure divinity, kento gets his fill of righteousness with the taste of your tongue. with your flavored chapstick lathering against his lips, he savors your body with his hands.

like vanilla cream, you’re just as sweet, you’re just as supple and it’s just as easy to swallow you whole. his hands devour your sides, your waist, and crave more.

they reach higher, cupping a breast over your shirt as his other hand guides your jaw towards his. kento’s always been good with his tongue: lapping and brushing against your lips for an entrance, molding his against yours in tandem, sucking and spitting when you ask for it, he’s deliberately messy when he eats.

with a slight tilt to the side, he squeezes your cheeks together as your vision unblurs— fixating on the string of spit you two share— he stares. his hand rises to the plump of your cheek, then wiping off all residue he’s left behind, pulling at your lip just barely.

it’s almost as if you had been competing for who could dominate the other first, nearly panting in a fight against who would pull away at the last second.

“you’re beautiful,” gold trails over his face as he begins to settle his spinning mind, “really so beautiful,” then kento’s rosy cheek rests against the beat of your heart. settling your hands onto his broad shoulders, he breathes into your skin once more, “my angel.”

you think your fiancé is the romantic type. given, he’s always gone all-out— always given too much, always much more than he receives himself— it explains why his left hand reaches for yours on his back, pulling away and intertwining fingers as he settles them onto the side of your head. your right hand follows the same route.

where your heart thumps in your chest and where it was against his ear, kento lays a sign of affection there first— like a travel stamp onto your skin that says he’s been here before and that he’ll come back again. distinctive, and yet so familiar, you feel like home. “my dearest…”

he lays another, pulling away a hand for a moment to bring the tip of his finger now along the lace of your bralette, ghosting over its material and your skin— he’s observant. taking his time, he robs your patience when he digs and pulls and watches how easily you fall out of the fabric you were in— kento tempts you here next.

on your hardened bud, he kisses you once. it’s a phantom of a thing, the way he presses his mouth and teases with a sliver of his tongue; kento intends to give you more attention— tangible love, the next time around. but seeing your lips bitten, chest rising, cock being the one in control of his mind— he wishes to claim you here too. he kisses you once and consumes you second.

“goddess divine.” he speaks and it’s all you hear before he latches onto you again. it’s vulgar, the way his teeth kiss and bear down on your puffy nub, his tongue swirling over and around it first, then later coated by the drool accumulating in his mouth to soothe your wound. he sucks and sucks and sucks, despite your many efforts and attempts to call out his name— kento pulls an inch away from your chest and enjoys the sound of it pop.

he enjoys it too much. he knows he’s guilty of it.

nanami babbles words onto your body as if they’ll transcribe where he’s left them. and come daylight, he swears he sees imprints of his adoration dusted in gold from the night before, “you know i love you?”

“do you know how much i love you?”

there are few times where kento ever sounds firm. like now, as if the severity of his question and the conviction in your answer becomes a matter of life-or-death to him.

because if there’s a pause— a single doubt that plagues the back of your mind or a thought that rots in the core of your soul that he may not be loving you as you wished to be loved, kento wants to know now.

the night before your wedding, if he’s been doing it all wrong, if he’s been so clueless about love like he feels he’s always been— nanami kento wants to start loving you as you have dreamed of it as a child.

your lover: the over thinker, the worrywart, born anxious to the bone when it comes to love— it must’ve been passed on from his past lives (how else could anybody be so worrisome?!) is as perfect as he can be. whoever said a fairytale kind of love could not blossom in the reality of this world has clearly never met the two of you.

“it’s what you always tell me, baby.” you speak with the same gentleness as a blanket of snow.

the hand on your lace meets the satin of your bow, caressing its edges playfully, “and what’s that, gorgeous?”

if he’s correct, he knows what you’ll say. ghosting your words right as you say them, “more than i’ll ever know.”

in the matter of life-or-death, he wins. because there’s no point in it if he’s not beside you for the rest— it’s as much of a blessing as it is to be born to find you again.

“i do,” he says, “i love you more than you’ll ever know.”

all you can really do is laugh. cherish this moment like the million others he’s given you, “i do too.”

your left hand parts ways from it being beside your face to it being in front of his, “tomorrow.” you wiggle your ring finger, “we’re gonna have to say it again.”

he laughs too, love boner springing and fighting against his pijamas, flustered and growing weak to your everything, “i’ll say it as many times as you want me to.”

there’s another bow that catches his eye though, resting just above your navel and just as pretty as the one on your chest. just like a child, kento touches things he shouldn’t— dragging a finger down your sternum, down your belly and stopping right before the lace could truly meet him.

“i’ll do anything you ask me to,” he finds your eyes wide like you’ve got a secret to spill, “you just have to say it.”

he enjoys the process of fucking you. getting each other hot and bothered, leave the other yearning, making them work for it— it’s exhilarating.

“ken,” he likes the sound of you being earnest, “i want you to fuck me. however you want.” and he likes this secret of yours too.

“however i want?” there’s a mischievous sound in the way he lilts his words, “that’s what you came for, right?”

both his hands hold your hips, “dressed up like a doll,” placing a kiss where the bow is, “all pretty.” another on your clit— and if it weren’t for his grip, your hips would’ve bucked and reached for his face right then and there.

he is such a tease but it’s too cute to make him stop, “all for me,” softly spoken in the form of a statement (not a question to be answered, not when there is no doubt.) his future husband ego blooms. he kisses you lower, still separated by the thin fabric, still keeping you on edge.

nanami releases his hold and it gives you hope, tugging down the sides while being careful to not tear a single thread of your lace but in that process, kento salivates at the slick collecting near your hole, as if strung together with the fabric he’s tearing away.

“how long were you touching yourself in your room?” he returns to the stoic self he shares with the world, thumb brushing against your clit as it makes you wriggle.

“how do you know?” you find his face between your legs, hands pulling your inner thighs apart— he’s yearning.

“i know what i eat.”

so he gives you a taste, licking with pressure, a line from your cunt to your clit— spitting it all onto your swollen bud— kento sucks it back up as if he wouldn’t know how his own pussy behaves.

“are you gonna tell me?” the words pull you in from your dream, his vision flickering over and back to you.

“just a little bit,” your whine from earlier comes back, “i couldn’t cum knowing you were practically next door.”

“you didn’t want to finish without me?” the grin on his face is unlike any other, “you’re so sweet, baby.”

eagerly, kento picks up where he left off, watching the way your pleasure builds when his mouth is on you.

with his lips apart, he sucks you in. lapping up all the slick that he’s now responsible for, swirling his tongue over your clit with pleasure and promise. though, his leaky cock doesn’t get any easier to deal with hearing your moans and his name come about because of it.

“sooo sweet.” whispers tease your skin as kento hears your breaths pulled closer and closer together. “look at me, love.” the hand that pulled your thighs apart now find themselves inside your cunt.

two fingers are all you need. the way he curls them against your silkened walls, repeatedly grinding against the spot that gives you this itchy feeling down your legs, and the sounds he gets out of you— they’re more than just whines, moans, and whimpers. he takes them as your declarations of love. the confession of your need for him to be the one to do this every night— it’s contagious— this love. it makes him think your pussy is all he needs.

“ugh ken!” your hands clutch the sheets below, gasping at the way he makes a little fool out of you.

“what is it? do you want a taste, baby?”

the mattress bounces as kento moves closer, keeping at his ministrations diligently when you nod in response. “i know… open up.” he’s in a daze as he’s over your body. a glob of spit comes out of him and swallowed up by you.

“i’ve been so selfish,” leaning his forehead against your temple, tip of his nose nudging at your cheek, “not offering until now.”

then you turn to face him, your kento, who’s just looking at you like the most precious thing he’ll ever hold.

“forgive me?” he says, pecking at your lips, once and twice until your hand keeps him in place by the jaw. you nod with his tongue clashing against yours, trading forevers with one another.

“you’re forgiven.” pulling away, there’s a smile on your face, dazed out eyes that mean a quiet euphoria coming soon.

“no, not yet.” and whether he says that in response to you or because he knows you’re close, is something kept silent and known only between him and god.

with one more kiss to your lips, nanami settles back where he belongs: on his knees, in front of you, cunt dangerously close to his face.

his fingers run slack, slowing down before you reach your peak but he promises it’s for the better.

“nooo, ken-!” you jerk your hips in search of any stimulation, hands nudging at his wrists to keep going. but he thinks it’s kind of cute seeing you squirm like this.

“princess?” the two fingers inside you come to a complete stop, frozen in the perfect curl up against your walls, making for the perfect method of torture against you. “i know you have better manners than that.”

“i’m sorry- i’m sorry.” an agonizing drag occurs in attempts to trouble you as you speak, “please let me cum, baby. i need it really bad.”

“yeah?” nanami tilts his head like a curious puppy, only his eyes lust-filled like a fallen angel, “how bad? enough to wake the neighbors?” the way he speaks these things so nonchalantly, you believe he’s made for the part to dominate you.

it’s hot. but you won’t let him know that yet.

“you’re being so mean.”

“does my girl not like it when i’m mean?”

with a puff, you use the voice that gets to him the most, if puppy-eyes became a tone of voice, “no. i don’t like it.”

“then why’d you squeeze around my fingers when i said it, my love?” the perfect curl zaps you with heat, with desire, as they begin their treading motions at an alarming pace.

kento’s always been so gentle as if not to break you. his lover made of glass, his girl of gold, he begins to rattle you in every way he can. “are you lying?” sloshing noises resound when his fingers stretch open your sweet cunt. “i don’t like liars, baby.”

he feels your slick thicken and gather around his knuckles, enjoying your fucked-out state too much to even care, “you get wetter when i am.”

your knees buck and rest by his wrist, nudging hands that were earlier begging for more are now asking for a moment to breathe— “you can be honest. say you like it.”

“say you like the way i fuck you, gorgeous.”

it’s mind-numbing, how this is really your kento. your lovesick boy who’d throw everything away to escape with you. the difference in character out and behind closed doors— you hadn’t expected it or else you would’ve put a ring on it sooner.

he doesn’t know what you’re thinking about to have you start squeezing around him continuously. and if you ever told him why, that you wish you could’ve fucked like this, cum like this, you think he’d go wild. “na’mi, i loooove it.”

“i love the way you fuck me,” a buzzing sensation reverberates in your ears, “i love the way you do it.”

more slick falls onto the sheets below, “your fingers feel so fucking good when they’re inside me.” they stiffen and melt against you as he hears your confessions.

“your mouth too— you love eating pussy, don’t you, sweetheart? always so fuckin’ consuming, you want more—” the slur in your words tell him he’s working you up, babbling everything he wants to hear. his baby’s been taught well. you deserve it all now.

it’s like in an instant, you are given the whole world. a man who will kneel over and suck on your clit when times are rough! and even when times are beautiful, he gives you more beautiful things to adore.

he’s beautiful when he looks over at you with hooded eyes, lapping up every bit of slick that’s come out of you. fingers rushing to match the pace he’s set with his tongue— spitting, sucking, swirling, repeat.

it itches something in him too— it’s just as you said. being consumed in the pleasure of giving it— it’s true.

so when you cum, very possibly waking the neighbors with that shock wave, he finds himself to be in a little pain. boxers no longer resisting his length though there was no stimulation to show for it.

he didn’t expect for you to enjoy it this much— his (newly found!) commanding nature— and he didn’t expect himself to cum from it either.

when you shake and tremble and that heat starts running up your back and behind your ears, his body tilts over from kneeling by your knees to resting his head on your tummy— bothered and also not, with it being annoyingly sticky in his pants.

you hold him, dragging fingernails across his scalp gently, he’s resting his eyes as they say.

he hears you giggle though, and it makes him pounce.

“that was new.” that’s only half of your truth, he feels it.

he hums, “mmhm.” snuggling back into the pillow of you.

“that was goood.” the whole truth— but really now, he thinks you’ve gone and infected yourself with the sillies. even if he can’t see you, he hears the cheeky grin on your pretty face— as pure as always.

“yeah?” his eyes flutter open for whatever reason, finding the table how you two left it— hour-old leftovers and paint samples of all shades because there is nothing more perfect in the world than that.

“yeah.” your voice grows quieter, yet equally as happy. the fatigue is getting to you now, he thinks.

one more thing is on your mind though, “same time tomorrow?”

he snorts. again. two times more than he’s ever and will ever snort in front of anyone else, “a lot more tomorrow.”

oh, your perfect day, “lucky me!”

྄🎀ུ @tetsumyheart, here’s that nanami piece we talked about the other day <3 completely rewritten ( i’m so sorry ) but at the very least, i hope you enjoy this long, looong mess of emotions. i’ve gone absolutely delirious about him ?!

lovely tags for my hearts of gold, @yuujilove · @bizarrebankai · @pretty-toru · @getosbunny · @satoruhour · @mrs-kurooo · @strawberrystepmom · @pawfaite · i love you all so very !!!

now, the real question is: what song would you play for the first dance on your wedding night with kento? i was listening to, last night on earth by green day while writing this and thought. yeah, this matches the emo tendencies he had as a teen <3 but tell me, wby !! ୨୧ you can also tell me your favorite part, i’d love to know about that too! ; )

Tee…

I’m now on my hands and knees BEGGING for bully Gojo who is (secretly) DISGUSTINGLY IN LOVE over the reader PLEASE ANY CRUMBS I WILL TAKE

(you don’t actually have to write this it was just a nice thought)

idkkkkk if it’s rly bully gojo—but he’s definitely a real cunt for sure.

i just think about an asshole! gojo a lot like he’s ur lab partners or something and he does that stereotypical jerk move where he’s like “seriously ?? her ??” when he’s first paired with you. and he’s just naturally an douche, yk ?? wears sunglasses indoors and makes jokes at the professors expense under his breath that gets him snickers and snorts from his frat guys in his class. has to be asked more than once to “please keep it down in the middle of class” by wtv prof he’s in class with.

and he ofc makes u do all the work bc he can’t be bothered—and on the rare occasion that he is bothered, he just does a poor job that’s the bare minimum and sloppy enough that ur like wtv i’ll just do it myself. and then ofc sometimes u don’t have a choice but to meet up to finish something after class every now and then—he wouldn’t care to, but he actually needs to know the stuff for the final report he has to write individually, so he begrudgingly meets up with you, and sometimes you notice his friends give you an amused look when he walks up with them. they snicker before they leave as he sits with you. sometimes they make a snide comment here and there like “have fun with ur super hot date” that makes him roll his eyes—he doesn’t do much to hide the look of distaste on his face.

but then—and he doesn’t even know when it happens—you start to slowly grow on him. because ur actually pretty snarky urself, sometimes making a dry comment here and there about the professor and his stupid bald headed self. sometimes a girl in the distance laughs too hard a group of guys that u roll ur eyes and mumble how “if i had a voice like that i’d never laugh in public” and it makes him snort a bit without meaning to. sometimes you stare daggers at the person who has their music so loud thru their headphones they can’t help but notice u and turn it down in embarrassment. ur actually not as much of a pushover as he thought—you just genuinely think he’s too incapable to help u out that you’ve just shrugged him off and started doing his part. it’s an easy weekly lab class anyway, you don’t need him—and then he realizes that u rly just don’t care for him. his little snickers at u with his friends and their snide comments roll off ur back bc well…he’s him—an asshole little frat boy and u didn’t expect anything better from him. so it makes him a little intrigued—maybe a little wounded in his pride, deep down, because no one has ever been indifferent to him before. they’re either madly in love, or they hate his guts, or they follow his lead. either works—he still gets the attention he craves.

but u just don’t rly care. and ur actually pretty cool, and kinda sorta funny in a way no one else is. he likes it…and fuck, now he’s starting to like you. he can tell bc when his friends ask how his little date with you went, he starts getting a bit huffy ab it bc they don’t need to talk about you. they don’t even know you…but also….its not a date. and that’s the worst part. sometimes it feels like a date. almost—sometimes you both decide to take a break in between and go get a coffee or a light snack. sometimes he’s even paid (to which you look mildly shocked before politely thanking him) and you both walk back to the library while u make light banter and it’s…well, fun. and nice. and your laugh is pretty. and your smile is kinda cute and he (though he hates to admit it) rly likes it when u laugh because of him.

and then things start to get messy—really, he didn’t mean for it to start this way. he really was meaning to ask you in a genuine manner to see u again once the semester was finished. because he’s actually started pulling his weight—he wants u to see him for someone who’s smart. satoru is actually rly rly smart and no one knows it because he doesn’t rly show it but he is. he wants u to see that side of him—somehow there’s some sick validation he rly needs from you knowing he’s not a dense frat guy who drinks and fucks until 3 am every night. so he starts doing his parts and actually communicates with u about sections. so starts ur texting routine—sometimes a little longer than u rly need to for just doing a lab together. sometimes it’s “did u hear ab that girl in our class getting dumped in front of the kfc ??” and sometimes it’s “god our prof rly needs to get some pussy” and other times it’s “look what the guy who sits behind us just posted on his story” and it leads to a few long convos that admittedly…are rly fun. ur so fun. he likes it. he rly does like u and he thinks maybe….maybe he’s grown on u too and you know what ?? satoru’s always a jerk but ur nice and who’s to say he can’t be nice too ?? just for one person. for u, he can be a nice guy—u carried lab all on ur own long enough that u deserve it anyway.

until he gets swayed in that way only a coward can. in that way you do when ur used to being “the man” around ur friends and ur too pressured to keep up that energy for appearances sake bc u don’t wanna be the laughing stock who softened up for “some nerdy chick who’s a nobody.” so he laughs when they laugh at the fact that ur probably “still a virgin who’s never touched a guy before” and then they’re patting gojo on the back and shoving at his shoulder as they laugh harder and suggest that “y’know what would be so funny man ?? if u took her virginity. you could probably do it.”

the thought is sickening because…satoru wouldn’t want to fuck you like that. god, you have him caring about when and how he fucks you—in fact, just thinking about you lewdly makes him feel guilty. disrespectful, even. you’re more than a fleshlight for his dick. since when did he become so respectful ?? but he doesn’t know how to say no, especially when everyone starts agreeing one after the other—and oh no, now they’re betting on how quickly he can do it….and oh, now it’s not just fucking. now it’s “how long until you think she’s head over heels for you? man, that would be a sight, huh ??”

and….well, satoru decides it couldn’t hurt, right ?? he does want to be romantically involved so that would include you being head over heels. hopefully. fingers crossed. and he doesn’t rly want to seem lame in front of the guys either, so he gets to keep both sides of the coin, so is it really that bad ?? maybe not the right idea but certainly the right execution. he’ll treat you well—that much he’s confident of. so he forces out a laugh and says “gimme a month or two, you’ll see.”

and a month or two they give him. and a month or two it takes—but not for you to be head over heels. it’s him who’s utterly and completely obsessed and fallen head first and whatever else they say to describe love because wow. this must be what it is. this must be that stupid fairytale shit they always talk about because fuck, no one has ever looked at him like that. like he’s some miracle to this earth and some wonder only you know of—like you hope it stays that way and that he’s yours and yours alone and no one else comes in to take him away. satoru really likes being yours, it kinda feels better than you being his. being yours means you hold him like that at night and wake him up to a kiss between his brows and sometimes, when he gets those migraines he’s prone to getting, you always seem to know. always seem to understand when to close the blinds and keep quiet and wrap him up in the covers as you rub your thumbs over his temples soothingly.

he almost forgets about that silly little bet he made two months ago when he’s around you. actually, he forgets everything when he’s around you. he’s only ever thinking about you, you, you. when he comes back to his frat house, on the other hand, they’re all gathered around waiting for the newest details. how you must’ve been so pathetically star struck by him. how you must be embarrassingly bad at kissing. how you must stutter over every other word around him. how you must be making a complete and utter fool of urself trying to impress him and be someone you’re not bc the real you would never pique his interest.

they’re wrong ofc. if anyone’s star struck, it’s satoru bc how the hell are u so…cool ?? and so funny and witty and carefree ?? and you’re good at kissing—have him chasing your lips with a whine every time. sometimes you even chuckle at him when he does and make him blush a bit. he’s the one who stutters over his words when he sees you in your little date night outfits. sometimes he watches you drink from your straw and his brain short circuits a little until you snap at him and ask him in confusion if he’s alright. but the real kicker ?? it’s that if anyone’s pretending, it’s satoru. you’re always just you—unapologetically so, that it’s endearing and beautiful and so unearthly he wonders how he got so lucky. but him ?? he’s always acting like some guy he’s not. some chivalrous guy who opens doors and pushes out seats and kisses the back of hands and waits at least a few dates before even considering fucking. some nice, sweet, genuine guy who’s deserving.

he’s not that—never was. if you knew the real him, you’d leave in a heartbeat. it’s a scary thought. a raw feeling he doesn’t like. makes him feel all self conscious and insecure and all that weird shit he never thought he’d feel.

he tries. so hard, he tries to make them forget about that silly little bet and just slowly drop it and maybe even forget ur dating so he can just stay living this peaceful little fantasy with you—but that’s stupid. that’s naive. it’s been 4 months and enough is enough—the guys need to see the look on ur face when u realize what a fool ur being and satoru is “being a lazy ass who’s too comfortable not having for work for pussy these days.” so then there’s a video going around. it’s everyone gathered around on the couch drunk and talking about you. and satoru. you both, in fact. how it’s been two months and u seem desperate for his attention with the shrill little voice you use to call him toru, baby! it’s so, so fucking embarrassing, they say. how you think he likes it. (he does. god he does so much, it hurts. he loves it, actually, when you call him that. makes him feel special in a way he never has.) but then, the worst, most disgustingly nauseous part of the whole thing is when satoru laughs along and plays into their awful words. just lets them talk about you like you’re some piece of meat. something for him to chew up and spit out after he has a taste or you. not even worth savoring and enjoying. he laughs along and agrees—you’re nothing special and he can’t wait until he’s free of you.

that part hurts. that part sucks the most—when he acts like he didn’t tremble under your touch every time you kissed him. like he didn’t beg you to stay just five more minutes! before walking out the door to go home. he acts one way in front of you and one way in front of them and what’s worse ?? you don’t know which one is real. couldn’t tell even if your life was on the line to decide. because there’s no way he’s that good at pretending to be desperately in love, no fucking way. but there’s also no way he can be in love if he’s talking about you like that. that’s not what love is—that’s not what love feels like. that’s not what it means to someone.

you don’t know which satoru is the real one, but you know that neither is worth your time. not if he can’t stick to it.

it’s terrible thing—the way you break up. it’s messy and teary and he’s begging, he’s actually begging. he never thought he’d do that. but he doesn’t even hesitate to plead for you to hear him out. baby, please let me explain. wait, please don’t walk away—please just listen! i can explain.

he can’t explain, though when you as him to. stands there with a bitten bottom lip and teary eyes that are pleading you to just stay with him. to overlook this and just … ignore it like it’s nothing. like what he did and said was just nothing and you can shrug it off like you’re nothing too. like your feelings are nothing and so is your worth and that’s why you should just ignore the way he absolutely destroyed your pride and reputation and dignity and worse….every ounce of your love.

such deep, raw, pure love—it’s almost enough to heal every dry crack and crevice of this earth and bring it back to life.

you look at him with teary eyes and something so broken, it makes him feel like dirt beneath your feet.

“it’s embarrassing, satoru,” you hiss that night through tears, “you’re in your twenties getting a degree and you’re still just a high school bully. life’s really gonna kick you in the ass some day.”

life’s already kicking him in the ass as soon as you walk out. the air is colder. the world is dimmer. food doesn’t taste as good and fuck—there is just so much loneliness when you have no one to be yourself with. when there’s no you.

but he supposes you’re right though—he is just a bully. it’s pathetic, really. and maybe it’s for the best. maybe you don’t deserve someone who’s only ever known how to feel good because someone else doesn’t.

ANGEL ON MY SHOULDER.

✧ PAIRING: gojo satoru x reader, geto suguru x reader (hinted) | 5k words

✧ SUMMARY: ghost!reader, major character death, jjk manga spoilers, so much angst bc you literally die lmao, longing, mutual pining, suppressed feelings, everyone sucks at love, some fluff, banter, might be slightly suggestive, lots of hinted feelings (read: suguru), arguments, overall this is painful so read if you enjoy angst !!

✧ RHEYA'S NOTE: this idea randomly came to me before i went to bed a few days ago and in the spirit of halloween, i figured why not? i live off of angst and need to share the pain with everyone lmao oops. this is late for halloween tho my bad !!

i. 2007

satoru brings one more flower than he did the day before. morning glories again, of course, but an extra one. he had added one more to the the bunch every day since the day you died. the first day, he brought three, wrapped with a cheap blue ribbon that he found in his desk drawer. it was hardly a respectable bouquet, but those three flowers were the ones he'd grown for you, so it only seemed fitting.

he didn't care much for gardening. but one day you asked shoko what her favorite flowers were so you could give her some on valentine's day. she asked you what yours were so she could return the favor.

satoru never forgot morning glories after that day.

he's not even sure if morning glories are appropriate to bring to a grave, but he knows you'd like them.

you would tell him it didn't matter anyway.

ii. 2007

(suguru did not cry when you died. satoru watched, intently, because there was nothing in the universe that his six eyes couldn't catch. he waited for it, even a sliver of emotion that would betray suguru's bleeding heart, but he gave nothing. he just stood in front of the stone that marked the end of your life with a deep stare. something had settled there in his eyes, cold and resolute.

a few months before you died, you had told satoru that there was something wrong with suguru. you said that he'd been distant, somewhere far away, and you worried for him. you always did, so open with your affection for him.

"don't want him to get lost." you had hummed, your shoulder brushing against satoru's as you raise the mango ice pop he brought you to your mouth. satoru watches your lips out of the corner of his eyes, his stomach flipping eagerly even as he keeps his face impassive.

"he said it was just the summer heat," he answers, ignoring the sweet mango juice dripping down his knuckles. "should be nothing."

you don't look all that convinced, turning your head to look up at him with meaningful glance. "you sure?"

he stares at you for a lengthy second, cerulean eyes darting over your facial features, before he reaches up and knocks his knuckle against your forehead. "yeah. he'll be fine." he assures, and your shoulders relax as you continue to eat the ice pop.

you were right about it all. four days after you die, suguru massacres an entire village.)

iii. 2008

satoru shifts in his bed, grunting quietly he begins to stretch his stiff joints. his eyes crack open, still heavy with sleep as he waits for his dark ceiling to come into focus. except it doesn't, because all he can see are a pair of very familiar looking eyes. unsaturated, but still so obviously the color he once knew. his own eyes snap open, all traces of sleep gone as he finally makes out someone who looks exactly like you, perched on his stomach with a confused and slightly panicked expression.

he shoots up, and you pull back a little. it looks like you're on his lap, and yet he can't feel you on him at all. he gulps.

"hey toru." you say quietly, and his stomach drops. the same eyes, the same voice. gods above.

"you're dead," he says simply, trying not to betray the way his pulse is jumping at even the smallest glimpse of you again. "you're not real."

"i'm dead," you confirm, nodding your head as you look down at your translucent palms. "but i'm here somehow."

he sucks in a breath, reaching out a hand as if to touch you. the disappointment he feels when it passes through your form is sickening.

you smile shakily, shrugging your shoulders as you attempt to make light of the situation.

"guess i couldn't stay away."

he stares at you for minutes without saying a word and you stare back, equally silent.

iv. 2007

(nanami had carried your body back, his teeth gritted as his blonde hair fell over his eyes. satoru never brought it up, but he knew that nanami remained bothered by it for the rest of his life. your death was bad timing, especially after they had just lost haibara a few weeks prior.

nanami had no reason to blame himself though. if anything, it was satoru's fault you were gone.

shoko had called him from the infirmary, her voice hard and pinched as she spat out three words: "get down here."

when satoru saw your body, he didn't say a word. just took a few long strides until he was at the table where nanami had placed you down. your eyes were shut, face resting in a way that seemed so unnatural. he opened his mouth to ask shoko something, but felt like he was choking on air, so he stopped himself.

then he grabbed your limp fingers, squeezed them gently. they were still a little warm, but not as warm as you usually run. shoko didn't say anything, just stood there with her hands clenched, short brown hair falling over her dark eyes.

satoru remained there for the next thirty minutes, waiting for you to sit up and laugh at the prank you were no doubt pulling. as if your blood wasn't still dripping all over the table.

shoko was the one who finally pulled a sheet over your body with shaking hands. she didn't look satoru in the eye, and didn't spare a glance when suguru burst into the room ten minutes later.)

v. 2008

it takes satoru a while to get used to the fact that you're not physically there. he has to bite his tongue when he moves to bump your shoulder or flick your forehead only to find that his skin goes right through yours. you always give him that same little rueful smile, and he sighs to himself.

he doesn't make an effort to figure out why you're there. he figures it's similar to how jujutsu users can come back as curses due to strong feelings. when he thinks about it though, guilt lodges itself into his throat, because the first thought he had when he heard you were entering death's door was no, don't you dare die.

every day he wonders if he's the one who cursed you to stay.

you act like it doesn't matter, hovering around him as he busies himself in his empty room. at first you're quiet, as though you've forgotten how to speak to him in your incorporeal form. but then you start asking him questions, and it's one question that satoru dreads to answer that you finally bring up.

"where's suguru?"

he's not stupid. he knows there's more you think of suguru than you've ever revealed. of course you'd want to know. but that doesn't mean he wants to be the one to tell you. you had died with nothing but a good impression of geto suguru. you'd probably died with your feelings for him still intact too.

it'd be selfish of satoru to ruin that.

"nothing, don't worry about it," he dismisses, voice clipped as he busies himself with preparing dinner. he knows that won't deter you.

you huff, moving to hover in his line of sight. you cross your arms as you glare at him seriously, and satoru hates how nostalgic your expression makes him feel. he tongues his cheek before sighing.

"he's gone." satoru answers simply. he tries to keep his tone even but it comes out bitter and strained. he can hear your quiet gasp, and feels your form move closer to him. if you were alive, he'd be able to feel your breath on his skin now.

"what do you mean, gone?"

satoru sighs again, turning to look at you completely. he hated everything about this. "he left school. went crazy. killed a bunch of people, including his parents."

he would've laughed at the comical way your jaw dropped if you didn't look so hurt. you sputter over your words as he picks up his bowl and moves to the table, trailing after him and demanding more information.

he doesn't hesitate to share, because he's always hated keeping secrets from you. you had this uncanny ability to see straight through him, and it never failed to make him feel unsettled. so he tells you everything that happened in the few weeks after you died. suguru leaving, their confrontation in shinjuku, his plans for non-sorcerers. he leaves nothing unsaid.

when he's done, he finally looks at you, trying to gauge your reaction. but you're just staring at his food with a bitter expression, brows pinched and lips pursed. satoru says your name once.

you glance at him, and it's too quick for him to look for any accusation in it. doesn't matter though, because he's ready to own up to his mistakes.

"you were right back then. about suguru." satoru admits quietly, turning to his food. he doesn't want to look at you anymore, because he's scared you'll show him how disappointed you are with him.

you don't say anything in response. but you sit down at the small dining table and watch him eat with soft eyes, one bite at a time. satoru doesn't admit it, but the whole time he imagines that you're gently rubbing his shoulder, and he thinks he hasn't missed you more than in that moment.

vi. 2007

(it was satoru's fault you died. if he hadn't been so selfish, you'd still be next to him, shoulder brushing his as the two of you walked through the streets of tokyo.

you had knocked on his door that morning before you had left for your last mission, rocking on your heels. he opened it groggily, still half asleep.

"you going on a mission?" satoru had yawned, drowsy eyes trailing over your uniform. you nod with a grin.

"mhm, with nanami. there are two separate areas with curses though, so we'll split up when we get there. should be simple enough." you shrug, toying with the collar of your uniform jacket.

satoru decides to be annoying. "then why are you here disturbing my sleep? get out." he groans dramatically, peering at you with narrowed eyes. you smack his arm, scoffing. you've stopped questioning why he keeps his infinity down for you do those things to him.

"i was gonna ask if you wanted to come with," you hiss, crossing your arms defensively. "but i'm taking it back, asshole."

he grins. "what? can't stay away?"

you roll your eyes, shaking your head with a sarcastic laugh. "don't flatter yourself."

satoru pauses for a second. "i was gonna go back to sleep." he admits, feeling a little guilty. he had just come back from a mission the night before, and he doesn't feel like leaving again. he doesn't know how to say that to you though.

but you see right through him, like you always do.

"you've been going on missions a lot lately," you smile earnestly, patting his shoulder. "no wonder you're tired."

"'m the strongest, i don't get tired." he protests, crossing his arms with a scoff. you roll your eyes again, sticking your tongue out at him as you heft your weapon over your shoulder.

"keep it up and you're seriously gonna fry your brain or something," you say with a shake of your head, eyes betraying your concern for him. he notices it, and tries to smother down the way it makes his stomach flip. "i'll be fine. you can come on my next mission with me."

fair enough, he thinks. he hadn't gone on missions with you or suguru in a while. he should remember to ask yaga to let him go on your next one. just the two of you. you and him. maybe he'd buy you a mango ice pop on the way back.

"fine." he acquiesces easily, not even thinking to protest. he'll see you later anyway, so he'll talk to you more when you get back.

you smirk a little, motioning to his bedhead, before gently kicking his shin. "go back to sleep then, stupid."

he rolls his eyes, reaching up to knock his knuckle against your forehead like he always does. "whatever. bring me some sweets on your way back, yeah?"

the laugh you give him as he shuts the door is the last thing he ever hears from you.

he should've gone with you.)

vii. 2012

satoru hates the way you're looking at him right now.

it was a stupid little mistake. he had gone to see little megumi and tsumiki earlier that afternoon, and as usual, you had tagged along with him. you'd watched him raise up the two kids over the last few years, never failing to tease about his newly acquired fatherhood, or how much he seemed to care about them despite his efforts to hide it. he didn't ever think to say that you'd helped him raise them up too. even in your incorporeal form you'd always been around to tell him what meals he could prep or to remind him that megumi liked black forest cake for his birthdays.

he'd gotten so used to you being around and he slipped up once. that afternoon when he had walked megumi home from school, teasing and poking fun at the kid, he'd made a stupid joke. megumi had rolled his eyes and told him to shut up.

and then without thinking, satoru had turned to you as you hovered next to him and groaned your name out dramatically before whining, "this kid is so mean to me!"

your eyes widened immediately, and if you were alive he'd probably see the color drain from your face. his stomach had sank and he couldn't tear his eyes away from you, even when megumi glanced at him with a raised brow.

"who are you talking to?" he asked, and satoru gulped, shaking his head as he broke eye contact with you to look down at the kid.

"nobody." he had answered.

he tries to ignore the meaningful stare you pin him with for the rest of the afternoon, hoping that you'll just forget about it. but as soon as satoru has left the kids and he's back in his own room, you're on him. he busies himself with making a cup of hot chocolate, even though he feels sick to his stomach.

"satoru you have to figure out how to get rid of me!" you plead, eyes so sad it makes his stomach churn. "i'm gonna drive you insane!"

"i'm fine!" he snaps back, shaking his head as he takes a sip from his mug, the warmth distracting him from whatever it was you were trying to remind him of. he places it down on the table in front of him and crosses his arms defensively. "it was a stupid mistake. won't happen again."

you shimmer in and out of focus, manifesting in front of him with a glare, though your eyes are still the same. wounded and hurt. "it wasn't and you know it! you can't keep living like this. i've been haunting you for years, toru!"

"well who asked you to go ahead and die?!" he yells without thinking, and it's like he sees your hurt bubble forth in slow motion.

"i went and died because i made a stupid mistake on a mission! quit blaming yourself, you dumbass!" you shout, voice raised higher than he's ever heard it.

satoru's mug shatters against the wall.

the two of you immediately turn to look at the mess with wide eyes, before slowly turning to each other to ensure that it really did happen.

"how'd you do that?" satoru asks quietly, his voice strained as he takes a few long strides towards you. you look down at your hand, the same one that you had lifted to swipe at his mug during your fit of rage. you look back up at him with wide eyes and parted lips. satoru's head is pounding, some kind of sick hope stirring within him. "you had to have touched it."

"i don't…" you trail off, voice filled with awe and a bit of fear. satoru reaches up a hand, ignoring the tremble in it, and moves to touch your face. he will never admit to the amount of times he begs in his head, please please please.

his hand goes straight though your skin, and your eyes soften. satoru lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding, hiding his disappointment as he takes a step back and turns away.

viii. 2006

(satoru thinks gardening is ridiculous. plants are so fragile, needing to be constantly monitored and cared for like children. he can't understand why anyone would choose to garden as a hobby when there were less stressful things to do in spare time.

even the process was time consuming, he realizes as he scoops out piles of dirt into the small pots he had set out on his windowsill.

he thinks back to the silly little grin you had on your face as you answered shoko's question.

"morning glory," you had said, leaning against her shoulder. "i like the way they open in the morning and close at night."

shoko hummed, staring at the sky even as satoru quietly eavesdropped. "you got a favorite color?"

"the blue ones," you answered. "they're the prettiest."

your voice echoes in his head as he places the seeds into the soil, and he sighs heavily. why he was doing this for you was beyond him.

the thought makes him annoyed, and he huffs in frustration the entire time he plants them. gardening had to be the stupidest hobby ever.

and yet when three blue morning glories bloom against his windowsill, he can't hold back his grin.)

ix. 2017

satoru's grateful that you don't watch him kill suguru.

he tells you to go, and you give suguru a long stare, face pinched and sour even though your translucent eyes are shining. it's a shame suguru can't see you though, because satoru thinks you look so pretty. suguru would've been lucky to have you be the last thing he ever saw.

you turn away and disappear without a word, and after one last exchange, satoru finishes the job.

it's only after he watches rika's final goodbye to yuta does he realize the extent of what a goodbye even means. he'd said one to suguru, and yet he can't help but miss him as he walks back home. he wonders if suguru wouldn't have had to die if you were still around.

satoru had never gotten a goodbye with you though. you're somehow still with him, but he misses you so much. it puts an ugly feeling in his gut, twisted and dark. it weighs down on his shoulders as he finally opens the door to his room, heavy and overwhelming as he sees you sitting on his bed, face vacant.

he says your name, and you don't move. he takes a seat next to you, and something about your sad expression makes him so unbelievably angry.

"quit being sad about it," he finally spits out, the truthful extent of his feelings coming out. "it's not like you're even alive that you'd be able to see him."

you scoff as you give him a sidelong glare. "what's that supposed to mean? one of my closest friends just died and you expect me not to be upset about it?"

"at least he'll find a way to you!" satoru hisses, clenching his fists so hard that his nails leave crescents in his skin. "you two can have fun together for all of eternity."

there's a tense silence that follows as he grits his teeth, turning away from you. he's so disgusted right now. with suguru, with you, with himself.

"i'm all by myself." satoru mutters bitterly, the words so foreign on his tongue as the truth hits him.

god he misses you so much.

he suddenly feels a sharp thwack on the back of his head and he's turning around with wide eyes.

"don't you dare forget about shoko!" you hiss, tears in your eyes as you glare at him, hand raised. "i'll never forgive you!"

his throat goes dry, because the smack you just gave him was the first time you'd touched him since the day you died. there's a storm in his throat that threatens to break free, but he tries to keep it lodged in his throat. even with your teary eyes, he thinks you look just as pretty as you did with life flowing through you.

he misses suguru. he knows you do too, because there are translucent tears dripping down your cheeks and he has never ached to touch you more. but he can't because you're dead.

you remain in front of him all night, barely saying a word in between your sniffles. he doesn't say anything either, just watching you.

he doesn't know what there is to say. the only thing he ever wishes he got to say to you was goodbye. but you're here, in front of him, so a goodbye seems pointless.

when the sun comes up, you wish him a merry christmas, and he swears you never left him.

satoru says it back to you. you smile sadly.

he misses you so much.

x. 2007

(satoru had cleaned out your dorm room three days after you died.

he didn't really understand why he was doing it so early. shoko had frowned when he told her that he planned to pack away your things, frowned in a way that made her look like she disagreed.

well even if she did disagree, it didn't stop her from sitting in your desk chair, chewing on her nail quietly as she watched satoru fold your clothes. he didn't even understand why he was doing this.

maybe it was because every time he walked past your empty dorm room he felt sick to his stomach. there was a twisting feeling in his gut when he realized that you'd never curl up in that bed again. never sit by the window with a grin watching him and suguru bicker as they threw playing cards on the floor. he figured the faster he got rid of your remnants, the quicker the feeling would go away.

that's what he's hoping anyway. but when he picks up your jujutsu uniform he feels something claw at his throat, and he unconsciously digs his fingers into the fabric. he hears a sigh from behind him and then shoko is at his side, wordlessly easing the cloth from his hand. she lays it on the bed, smoothing out the wrinkles before folding it carefully. when she places it into the box, satoru thinks her hands shake a bit.

there's a bitter expression on shoko's face that he's never seen before, and it makes his stomach twist.

they work on your room for the next few hours, until the sun has disappeared behind the horizon and the cool evening breeze bullies its way into your old space. neither of them say anything, save for the occasional nostalgic hum as they remember something that you did or they're reminded of the story behind one of the trinkets in your room. otherwise it's silent, and for a second satoru feels like he can hear your laugh.

it isn't until night has completely fallen that they are interrupted.

"what are you doing?"

satoru turns around just as shoko looks up, both of them finding suguru standing in the doorway. he hadn't taken a step in yet, eyes still trailing over the emptiness of your old room from behind an uncrossed line.

"cleaning." satoru answers, his voice oddly clipped.

"it wasn't messy…" suguru mutters back, his lips slanting in such an unusual way. there was an uncharacteristically determined look in his eyes, as though there was something in him that was struggling to burst forth. satoru didn't understand what it was.

"never said it was." satoru replies noncommittally. he hears shoko inhale deeply, shifting in your old chair as she watches the two of them stare at each other. there's a tense silence as he notices suguru frown.

satoru can't remember the last time he even had a full conversation with suguru. he remembers seeing you leave for your last mission, and he wants to kick himself for not asking earlier to be sent on group missions with the two of you.

even now, he doesn't really know what to say to suguru. all he can do is tighten his fingers around the edge of the box with your stuff neatly packed in, and watch his best friend sigh.

suguru wets his lips, eyes darting over your desk. there's an odd expression on his face, and his brows pinch as he notices something. then suguru reaches out to pick up an old polaroid, and satoru knows exactly which one it is. your arms slung around suguru's shoulders, smile so wide your cheeks probably hurt. suguru's expression was uncharacteristically gentle.

satoru remembers it so well, because he's the one who took the picture.

suguru looks at the polaroid without a word, rubbing the corner between his thumb and forefinger, and his expression suddenly mirrors the gentleness in the picture. his eyes remain stormy, deep and unsettling as he reaches conclusions that satoru will never understand.

the three of them stay quiet for a few minutes, even though satoru has so many questions that he can't figure out how to phrase. shoko toys with a cigarette between her lips, leaving it unlit because you've always hated the smell of smoke. suguru just stands there, silently eyeing your unfiltered smile through the lens of a camera.

satoru wonders if suguru's trying to say goodbye to you. he doesn't ask, and suguru doesn't say.

only after something had clicked in suguru's eyes, did satoru realize something was over. he couldn't help but feel like he had just buried you in that cardboard box with all your things, and he swallows hard.

then suguru clenches his fists, veins flexing as he looks around your room, almost like he was committing it to memory. satoru didn't understand why; it's not like suguru couldn't come see your room anytime he wanted.

then he turns away, hand lingering on the doorframe heavily, without another word.

just as suguru walks away, satoru thinks he hears your voice whispering in his ear.

"don't want him to get lost."

xi. 2018

something is wrong. something happened. something is wrong.

satoru knows he needs to wake up. but he's so tired, so exhausted from carrying on all by himself. he suddenly remembers the taste of frozen mango, sweet and chilled, and he wants to keep thinking about it for the rest of eternity.

but something is wong. he needs to wake up.

the minute satoru forces his eyes open, he can ignore the taste of blood in his mouth because you're there.

you're kneeling at his side, sunlight shining behind your head in a way that makes you look almost angelic. he'd believe it if you said you were an angel, because you've been dead for so long now.

you'd been a ghost for so many years, hovering around him and getting him through everything that had come his way. isn't that what guardian angels were supposed to do, guiding humans through their own trials? isn't that what you were doing to him since the day you died and came back to him?

you'd been a ghost. you'd been his angel. you'd been haunting him.

you'll always haunt him.

you seem to know it too, because the expression on your face is understanding, soft and yet so sad.

for what seems like the millionth time in his life, satoru aches to touch you.

he tries to move his hand but finds that he can't. synapses misfire. he can't feel his body anymore.

he wants to touch you. gods above, he wants to touch you so badly. please just this one last wish.

your translucent forms shimmers in the sunlight, and satoru can't tell if he's hallucinating or not because you suddenly seem to become fully physical. the particles of your form solidify, slowly filling with more color until you don't look quite so dilute. the saturation of your eye color comes back, and satoru can't look away because he's never seen a ghost so pretty before.

his breath hitches as you gently cup his cheek in your palm, warm and gentle. the melancholic look on your face makes his eyes sting.

"it's good to see you." he says with a weak smile, ignoring the metallic taste on his tongue. his breath is short, mind racing because your skin is on his again. finally, after so many years. you're so soft, just like he remembers.

"you weren't supposed to join me this quick." you sigh, eyes shining as you smile down at him ruefully. your thumb brushes over his bottom lip, and satoru's cerulean eyes flutter.

no. no more waiting. he'd missed you too much. he doesn't have it in him to stay away from you anymore. he'd done it long enough. your fingers tremble against his skin and he almost laughs.

no more haunting.

there's a resolute part of him that knows you'll be the first thing he sees when he gets to wake up again. he decides that, when he does, he'll get you a mango ice pop and plant some morning glories with you.

his eyes fall shut with a sigh.

"guess i couldn't stay away."