Mark Antony: Whats Wrong, Caesar? You Seem A Bit Down.

Mark Antony: What’s wrong, Caesar? You seem a bit down.

Caesar: My whole day is ruined! I just had a seizure, Cassius looks at me funny, and no one wants me to be king!

Mark Antony: There, there, Caesar. There’s no need to fuss. Cassius doesn’t mean anything by the way he looks at you.

Cassius stands next to Brutus while eyeing daggers at Caesar.

Mark Antony: And who cares if a few smelly old plebeians don’t want you to take away their freedom by ending an era of the Roman Republic and ruling over them with an iron fist? You’ll always be king to me.

Caesar: R-r-really?

Mark Antony: Of course. Come on, Caesar, I’ll buy you an ice cream.

Caesar: Oh, boy!

Mark Antony and Caesar hold hands and skip merrily down the street.

I’ve never abused alcohol. Everything I’ve done with alcohol has been completely consensual.

fuck those “200 words to use more often in writing!” lists. the point of a really GOOD word is that you only get to use it every so often, when it’s exactly the perfect word to use. sort of like killing ordinary goblins with a regular short knife most of the time, and only reaching for the ancestral blade your father bequeathed to you in his dying hour when you have to defeat the Goblin Overlord. 

If you smoke pot while staring at a Rothko, what was wasted, the pot or the Rothko?

Is it normal to hyperventilate during sex? I try to enjoy myself, but when my hands and feet start tingling I get nervous and have to stop.

I don’t know from normal, but I would say that if you’re so nervous you’re hyperventilating, that’s something that probably needs to be addressed. It might help to figure out what, exactly, is causing that extreme anxiety. Like, is it just during intercourse with another person, does it happen on your own, is the nervousness coming from a physical response or is it a mental/emotional thing, like loss of control or fear of vulnerability, something like that. Maybe pinpointing why you have that feeling will help you overcome them?