rayday-mayday - I'm an anxious mess :')
I'm an anxious mess :')

| he/him | Proship | I will block as I please || Birthday: July 19th 2005 || Professional yapper |

129 posts

I Know This Will Probably Be A Pretty Niche Acceptance/positivity Post, But For For The People Who Are

I know this will probably be a pretty niche acceptance/positivity post, but for for the people who are minorities and fetishize/sexualize that part of themselves: You aren't a "bad example" for doing so.

Being a minority can be really traumatizing, and the trauma and abuse we endure can often go overlooked or be minimized. It isn't wrong for you to react to that trauma in a way where you attempt to take control back of your identity, even if that control takes the form of a sexual coping mechanism.

Personally, me being misgendered for 4 to 5 years fucked with my head a lot, and while that doesn't sound "that bad" to most since they've never endured that type of pain, it basically meant the people around me was ignoring and denying me my identity for pretty much my entire teen life which were already fucked over by other factors.

While I won't go into too much detail, all those years of having such an integral part of me denied ( especially during such formative years of my life ) lead to me developing a forced feminization kink as a trans man.

At times it can trigger my dysphoria, I have to be careful participating in it, and do my best to not oversexualize myself too much, but either way, I'm not bad for that happening to me nor am I bad for having the kink. Similarly, you're also not bad for it, no matter what your story looks like, nor how your kink manifested.

Even without any explicit trauma like that, being a minority that's just existing can be inherently traumatizing and scary as fuck. I mean, why wouldn't it be when the world around you is hostile towards you, be it overtly or covertly, simply for existing?

While I know you can also be into this type of stuff without having trauma like this, ( which is also just as valid, ) I've just never see anyone talk about this type of stuff in the sense of it developing from trauma, so I wanted to make a post like this in case anyone out there can relate and needs to hear this.

Cuz if I'm completely honest? It's kinda lonely and isolating to go through this type of stuff, due to how taboo it is to fx. be a trans person that fetishizes themselves. People can make you feel shameful for developing a kink like this, or for simply fetishizing yourself at all, since it can make those mentioned people label you as a "bad [insert whatever minority here]"

Just remember to pace yourself, know your limits before it starts to harm your mental health, and remember that at the end of the day you're more than just a sexual object; you're a person that deserves respect, love, and acceptance.

Even if you can't do any of those things just yet for whatever reasons, I'm sure you can work towards partaking in the kink you have in a healthy way eventually. I believe in you.

I Know This Will Probably Be A Pretty Niche Acceptance/positivity Post, But For For The People Who Are
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More Posts from Rayday-mayday

10 months ago

This combined with the growing pressure to always be "morally right" online, that you're not supposed to even have a chance of being "bad" or otherwise it's a moral failing, the black/white thinking that is often pushed in antiship spaces, and the lack of room for nuance that that creates.

Certainly doesn't help if the person having these beliefs pushed on them are young, don't know any better either, and/or if they come from a society where purity culture exists heavily around them.

I've seen that the decline in media literacy rates could help explain why many young antis seem to think that fiction impacts reality in the way they do. With media literacy skills becoming less common, there's a growing gap in understanding how fiction and reality intersect. Antis who don't have critical engagement with media can lead to misconceptions about the nature of fictional content and its influence on real-world behavior. As a result, young antis might struggle to distinguish between the fictional and the actual, which could account for their more extreme viewpoints on shipping.


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10 months ago

I seriously don't get why antis believe that SA ( or just sex in general ) and violence are so far removed from each other. Like, of course there's how both rape/SA and violent actions ( murder, battery, etc ) are illegal and harmful, but there's a lot more on top of that that links the two.

Like, there's how SA aka Sexual Assault literally has the word "Assault" in it. You know, which is a crime of it's own that involves physical violence sometimes. Saying rape/SA of any kind and violence aren't the same/linked, inherently takes away the violence of rape/SA.

We could also take a look at the BDSM scene, where stuff like choking, spanking, bruising, biting, etc are quite common kinks that obviously go alongside sex, which, once again, links the two subjects.

There's cannibalism which is inherently violent, but often sexualized in multiple different ways. Be it the classical soft vore fetish art you see online, or the metaphors where cannibalism and sex are woven together to show some deeper meaning.

And there's also how classical horror media and ( fictional ) non-con media can produce similar reactions in people. I know personally that when I read yandere x reader fanfiction ( both with- and without non-con elements ) it gives me this form of rush that has helped me cope with the urge to be abused. And just here a bit ago I was playing Doors ( yes, the Roblox horror videogame ) which gave me a similar rush of adrenaline.

I know part of the appeal of monsterfucking at times also ties into the fear and horror of the creatures, which ties into the violence and destruction these monsters can commit.

There's also how both violence and sex can be practiced safely if everyone involved is consenting, and have the proper safety precautions in place; and how both can also be traumatizing if done without consent and/or without the proper safety precautions.

As you can see just by those examples, sex, violence, fear, and trauma are incredibly closely linked. This isn't to say that sex is bad or that violence is good, but that denying that all those subjects are tied together, or that saying they aren't similar, is just flat out wrong.

Tbh there's probably more examples out there, too, but those listed above are just the ones I can think of at the moment. Feel free to add onto this in the reblogs/tags/comments if you can think of any. I just wanted to ramble about this after I realized how similar the rush I get from horror games is to the rush I get when I read darkfiction.

I Seriously Don't Get Why Antis Believe That SA ( Or Just Sex In General ) And Violence Are So Far Removed

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10 months ago

"you're unemployed?" no being my f/o's trophy spouse is a full time job


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10 months ago

Giggles

Giggles
Giggles
Giggles

If you use the term "Cheese Pizza" I am already not taking you seriously lol. If you tried to report to police an edit of two fictional characters, they would either ignore you or laugh at you.

And no, your job recruiter/college principal won't care about what headcanons/ships/edits you made. But they could care if you sent someone death/rape/dox threats/baits (sounds familiar, antis?) especially if it got popular.


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9 months ago

The disappointment of going onto the selfship tag, seeing a person selfship with a few characters you know, and get excited cuz of that. Only to go to their profile, ( to see if they're into more stuff you know, ) and then seeing "proship DNI" in their bio.

Like, you could've been so cool, man... You could've been so, so cool...

The Disappointment Of Going Onto The Selfship Tag, Seeing A Person Selfship With A Few Characters You

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