Razorsharpe1 - Humbling Healing

I'm horny but not horny enough to fuck people who don't love me

Nothing but her

Frida Kahlo, from a letter wr. c. November 1933, featured in The Letters of Frida Kahlo: Cartas Apasionadas

I love this, I wish I’d engaged with this instead of drowning in a sea of misconceptions and miscommunications

Sometimes tricky conversations are easier if you feel like you’re explaining yourself to a third party instead of each other. This is why new things often surface at couple’s therapy.

So here’s a fun assignment if you’d like one:

Pretend you have a podcast and are taking questions from callers. Answer these questions together as if answering the callers’ requests. Listen to each other with great curiosity.

1. How would you define your role in the dynamic to someone who is new to the lifestyle?

2. How would you define your partner’s role in the dynamic?

3. What would you change about the way you entered into D/s or BDSM?

4. What the very best thing about your dynamic?

5. What’s the number one thing you would change about your dynamic if you could be totally selfish and snap your fingers to make it so?

6. How important is the D/s or BDSM to your overall relationship?

7. Most people in the lifestyle have dreams at night that maybe push the envelope a bit. If you get these dreams, share a few.

8. How important is discipline/punishment within your dynamic? Do you wish it was more/less important to your partner?

9. Are rules a necessity to keeping your dynamic at the forefront?

10. How often do you need to feel your partner’s dominance/submission?

11. If your partner HAD to either dial their dominance/submission waaay up or waaay down (no middle ground) which would you choose?

12. What is one thing you’ve never tried that you’d like to try this month?

13. Does degradation have a place in your dynamic? Discuss.

14. If spanking is part of your dynamic, and just for this question you didn’t have to take your partner’s desires into consideration at all, would YOU like the spankings to be more/less painful? More/less frequent?

15. What’s your favorite D/s activity? What is your least favorite D/s activity out of the activities you actually partake in?

16. What do you wish your partner had a better understanding of as far as what goes on inside your head regarding D/s? Here’s your chance to really expound. Help them understand you, even if it’s uncomfortable. Take all the time you need.

17. Tell in detail about one of your times together that you really like to replay in your mind.

18. Tell your partner what would make your dynamic even more meaningful to you.

19. Are you holding back because you fear judgement?

20. Why is your partner a great fit for you? What are they great at?

What questions would you like to add?

Making me loose myself.

Resentment is the hardest injury to recover from.

There is a hole in my heart, deeper than the deepest ocean

- V. Blue

There’s a quote, a meme, an anecdote or some form of philosophical internet content that will support whatever narrative you want to believe.

The people creating or uploading the content are not certified mental health practitioners or therapists.

Ask yourself, of the people advocating the steps you’re taking, how many are in successful loving relationships, how many worked to save and heal a family relationship?

We’re influenced by people that think quitting is healing.

If you’re not capable of fighting, you’re not peaceful, you’re weak.