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bucky, bucky

there lived a certain man in russia long ago | 20+

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Bye I Already Prepared Myself When I Saw The Summary But Here We Are Jake, Eres Mi Hogar Y Mi Paraiso

bye i already prepared myself when i saw the summary but here we are 😭 jake, eres mi hogar y mi paraiso

Glimpse of Us

pairing (s): marc spector x reader, steven grant x reader, jake lockley x reader

summary: you love all three of them equally, not knowing only one of them truly loves you just as much

word count: 2.8k

warning (s): this is heavily inspired by glimpse of us by joji. that’s the warning

moon knight masterlist

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．

Marc stared across the room at you, someone who he once thought he loved. He tried telling himself that he still loved you, but then he questioned himself if he ever did love you, or perhaps he was just seeing you as someone who could love him unconditionally.

You came when he was at the lowest point in his life, and you had given him your hand, helping him up. You loved him with all of your heart, dealing with his demons and fighting against his nightmares. And yet, Marc realised now that as much as he wanted to love you, his heart was still hers, and not yours.

He thought he was ready to move on after Layla, but he was wrong. He wished he would have realised it earlier, at least he would not be involving you in his mess of a heart, but now you were seeing him in your future, and Marc did not want to hurt you.

He forced a smile when you came and pressed a kiss on his head, something which he has grown accustomed to, but now he could not help but feel irritated at the contact. Marc clenched his jaw, hoping that you could not see how distant he was getting with you.

You loved him too much to see it.

“I have to leave for work now. But I’ll see you tonight, right?”

You asked, and Marc saw how hesitant you were. Of course, you always remembered the date night that you would have with him every week. Marc has stood you up for two weeks straight, wallowing himself in devastation as he thought you did not deserve to be treated like this.

But still, when he said he was tired and had forgotten, you just nodded and told him that it was fine, and you would start planning for the next date night to make him feel better.

You loved him too much to realise that he was tired of you.

Marc used to think he loved it when you rambled about something you were passionate about, with the gleam in your eyes and the smile which reached your eyes. He thought he adored it when you would learn to cook his favourite food, when you did not even love cooking. He used to feel like the luckiest man alive when you would listen to his past, swearing to him that you would always be there for him.

Now he was getting tired of you, but he also did not want to lose you, the only anchor to his sanity.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I don’t think I can see you tonight.”

He saw your smile dropped, and he also saw how quickly you pulled yourself together, not wanting to make him feel bad about it, when he should. Marc realised that he was the one who kept throwing lies, but you always tried to make him feel like he was the better half in the relationship. With tears in your eyes, you gave him a nod, and a half-hearted smile.

“It’s alright. If you have anything to talk about, you know you can talk to me.”

Worry was dripping from your voice, and Marc could not help but smiled at you. It was one of the reasons he did not want to tell you the truth. The truth that he had never loved you as much as you did him, and the truth that he had wished it was her who was smiling at him now instead of you.

If you leave him, he would have no one else to cared for him as much as you did. Not even Layla. He could not tell you the truth. He needed you.

“I love you, Marc.”

“I love you too."

Marc was not the only one who was bathing you in lies. Unbeknownst to you, Steven was hit with a pang of guilt every time he laid his eyes on you. Your sweet Steven, who could make the worst of your days better with just a smile of his, actually was lying through his teeth every time he said he loved you the most.

Yes, he loved you, but he never meant to love you the most. He had her in his heart, and he saw her every time you looked at him. Oh, sometimes he wished he could fight these ugly feelings, so that he would not break your heart, but he could not. He was in love with her.

While Marc was getting distant, Steven was getting closer.

He believed that he had a lot to make up to you, and he planned to do it by showing you how much he cared about you, even if the things he did were only a play pretend. You never saw him as someone who could hurt you, and he was determined to keep it that way.

He never wanted you to leave him.

Steven loved the comfort you had given him, making him feel safe and loved every time he was with you. He knew if you found out that you were not the only one in his heart, you would be dejected and you would not think twice to leave. It was the last thing he wanted to happen.

Thus Steven savoured every moment he had with you, trying his hardest not to think of her when he was with you. Marc might have come to accept that he would always think of her, but not Steven. The guilt was too heavy for him to carry, and so he spent his time pretending to love you, hoping that one day he would wake up with genuine love for you.

“Thank you for today, Steven. I had a really good time.”

He let you intertwined your fingers with his, as both of you walked home from the art gallery. You had talked about it for a few times, and Steven thought you would be over the moon if he brought you there for a date. He was right.

“I had a really good time too. But maybe because I’m with you.”

A shy smile grew on your face at his words, and Steven grinned, pride swelled in his chest when he managed to make you so happy with his presence. A tinge of guilt was still hanging above his head, but he chose to ignore it.

“I always have a good time with you, Steven.”

Your words were so sweet and genuine, that tears started to pool in his eyes. He was beginning to see how wrong this whole thing was. He kept making you think that you were the apple of his eye, and you looked at him as if he hung the moon for you when all he ever did was trying to love you.

He should not be doing this to you.

But when you held on tighter on his arm, almost putting yourself behind him when a stranger was watching you— Steven knew he had to keep you safe with him. He was going to protect you, and he could only do that if you were with him.

He knew you deserved to be with someone who truly loved you, but what if that someone hurt you? At least with him, you would not be hurt. Steven would always make sure that you had a smile on your face, and he was sure that he could never make you cry. You said so yourself, that Steven could never be the reason behind your tears.

Steven was going to show you how loved you were, and he promised himself he would never shatter your precious heart. He would do it all for you because he loved you, it was just he loved her more and you had to stay second to her in everything.

But you did not need to know that.

And so he lied, hoping that you would feel his love for you. Even if it was not enough.

“I love you.”

It was always enough for you.

“I love you too, Steven.”

Jake hated this whole ordeal. He saw how badly Marc was treating you, with his missing dates and his lame excuses. He also despised the way you looked at Steven as if he was your soulmate, when he had another woman in his head every time he tried to think of the one he loved.

Marc and Steven were being cruel and unfair to you, and Jake loathed them for taking you for granted when you were the best thing that ever happened to them. They would never find anyone who could love them as much as you did.

“Jake!”

A smile found its way on his face, when you walked in, only to realise that he was fronting. You always managed to make him feel so special and appreciated, with your soft touches and your loving words. He used to feel like he did not deserve your love, but you made sure him understand that you loved him so much.

“Did you miss me, mi sol?”

You did not even answer him, running into his opened arms and kissing him with so much love that he might fall on the floor if he was not holding you. You caressed his face gently, staring at him as if you were afraid that he might disappear into the thin air.

“I missed you so much.”

He said, knowing that you needed to hear it from him. When you buried your face in his chest, he only wrapped his arms around you tighter, resting his chin on your head. He wanted to stay that way with you forever if he could. He wanted it to be just you and him, and no one else could take you away from him.

Jake was so in love with you.

He loved you so much that it angered him every time he was reminded of Marc and Steven with their deceitful affection. He did not know how could they had somebody else to love, when you were there, loving them endlessly. You were always enough for Jake, and he never wanted it to change.

He could still remember when the weight of the world was bringing him down to his knees, you were there. Your heart broke when he got hurt, and back then he could not understand why. No one had ever cared for him before. He had chased you away, asking you to leave him alone but you stayed.

You stayed with him when he was soaking your shirt with his tears. You held him when he could not find the words to tell you what was wrong with him. You loved him when he felt like he was undeserving of such affection. With you, his life was not all about guns and blood, and finally he found a purpose.

Jake fell in love with you, and he never stopped falling.

You saw the world in rose coloured glass, and at first it baffled you so much when Jake was so harsh and mean towards everyone but you. He never smiled at anyone else, and no one had ever heard him laugh except you. A mocking grin or a bitter chuckle? Those were reserved for everyone else, but you. You only deserved to see his genuine smile and hear his hearty laughter.

“Why are you so mean to them?”

You had asked him once, and Jake just wanted to pull you close and kiss you. But you were pouting, and as much as he thought it was cute, he loved your smile more.

“I’m mean to them because they’re not you, mi corazón.”

The smile you had given him that day was the prettiest he had ever seen, and he kissed you, again and again to remind you of how special you were to him. His world revolved around you now.

He loved it when you kissed his nose, a giggle escaped your lips when he scrunched his nose. He loved it when you tickled him to wake him up, only to learn that he was not ticklish and he had tickled you back as a revenge. He loved it when you put your head on his chest, claiming that his heartbeat calmed you down.

He loved everything you did and said. He truly loved you.

Jake watched with an amused smile as you dropped your shopping bag on the counter. You could do something as simple as sorting out groceries, and he could fall in love with you all over again. Every day he found a new reason to love you even more than he already did.

“Do you need help?”

You shook your head, but still, he made his way to you. He could not stay away from you much longer or he would suffer. He helped you sorting the groceries, glancing at you once in awhile, like a fool in love he was. His eyes landed on the tubs of ice cream you had bought.

“I bought your favourite ice cream!”

You had seen him noticing the ice cream, and Jake felt warmth wrapped around his heart at the thoughtful gesture. You could see anything that reminded you of him, and you would buy it within a heartbeat. It was a way of showing your love.

But then his heart felt heavy, seeing another two tubs of ice cream which clearly were meant for Steven and Marc. All of them loved different flavours of ice cream, and you were well aware of that. You always remembered them.

His heart was aching, not from jealousy, no. It was from the way you were so in love with him. The way you were so in love with Marc, and Steven. You trusted them with your life, loving them with all of your heart, not knowing that only one of them truly reciprocate your feelings.

Jake felt like he was responsible for the lies both Marc and Steven were spluttering on you, even if he was not. He felt like he should tell you the truth because you deserved to know the truth. It would send you into a pit of agony, but at least you would not be lied to anymore.

“I think you should come with me next time, and maybe you can stop me from buying so much snacks.”

Jake watched as you laughed, trying to get all of the snacks you bought out of the shopping bag. He could only give you a soft smile, and he felt like he was going to cry when you returned his smile. You did not know how saddened he was, to think that one day you would discover the truth, and you would leave him.

He believed that if he told you the truth about Marc and Steven, you would pack your things and leave. He did not know how to stop you, because when you looked at him, you could also see Marc and Steven. You would leave him in a forlorn state, as Jake had forgotten how to live without you.

So he swallowed the lump in his throat, and buried the guilt in the back of his mind. He could not tell you the truth about Marc and Steven’s fading feelings for you.

He was too in love with you to let you go.

It might be selfish of him, but he found himself pulling you into his arms, as the thought of you leaving him was starting to make him feel sick. If you leave, Marc would lose his mind, Steven would lose his comfort, and Jake— He would lose you, the love of his life.

He would never let it happen.

So he just held you in his arms, showering your face in kisses and smiling when he heard your sweet laughter. You were in love with him, and he was in love with you. That was enough. For a moment, Jake could forget about what he knew and just focused on you, the person who owned his heart and soul.

“I love you, Jake.”

Your declaration of love always sound so sweet and nectarous for him. Those words could mean nothing to the other two men, but Jake lived for your every word. He moved his hands from your hips to your face, resting his forehead against yours, never once did he look away from your loving eyes.

You had been fed with too many fabricated words of love from Marc and Steven, and Jake was not going to add on them. He was going to make sure you know and feel how in love he was with you, and that you could plunge a knife through his chest and he would let you.

“I love you too.”

You smiled, just like how you smiled at Marc and Steven when they said those words to you. For a moment, Jake was heartsick. He knew his words meant more than theirs, but you did not know that. You were in love with all of them, and if keeping you in the dark about Marc and Steven meant that Jake could love you forever, then he would have to do it.

“I love you so much, princesa.”

Bye I Already Prepared Myself When I Saw The Summary But Here We Are Jake, Eres Mi Hogar Y Mi Paraiso

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