Weiss: Do You Have Any Idea Where You Last Left Your Bow?

Weiss: Do you have any idea where you last left your bow?

Blake: If I knew, I probably wouldn’t have asked if you saw it anywhere.

Weiss: Then we must get to the bottom of this! Where is the bow? The game is on.

Blake: What are you, Sherl-

Weiss: *Now dressed like Sherlock Holmes*

Blake: -yes, apparently you are. Didn’t take you for the dress up type.

Weiss: This is strictly to get me in the mindset for deductive reasoning. All business.

Ruby: I’ll be Watson!

Weiss: No you can’t play with us!

Ozpin: Nora Valkyrie, do you take Lie Ren to be your lawful husband, to love and to hold for as long as you both shall live?

Nora: YES! To eternity if I have to!

Ozpin: *Chuckles* And Lie Ren, do you ta-

Ren: Yes.

Ren: Apologies. I can barely contain my excitement right now.

Nora: Oh Renny...

Jaune: *Cries tears of joy on the side*

Ozpin: Well, with the power vested in me by numerous Kingdoms and the God of Light, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the... best man?

Ren: ...

Jaune: What now?

Nora: Are you screwing around with us Oz? Now of all times?

Ozpin: Don't look at me, Oscar went and got this book at the adult section at the library.

Oscar: Sorry guys, that's my b.

Nora: *Sighs* Well, gotta do things by the book I guess. Pucker up Jauney!

Jaune: Nora, I don't think you have t-

Nora: *Grabs Jaunes head and brings it down for a quick sensual kiss*

Audience: *Gasp in shock*

Nora: *Releases Jaune and licks her lips* Did you eat some of the wedding pancakes?! Those were for later!

Ren: I... can't believe what I just witnessed.

Jaune: *Panicking* R-Ren, I'm so sorry! I-

Ren: We've been planning this wedding for months, and you call that a wedding kiss? *Grabs Jaune by the collar and dips him into a intensely passionate kiss for a full minute*

Audience: 😳

Nora: Oh Renny!~

Ren: Mmmmwa! *Finally releases Jaune before unceremoniously dropping him to the ground.* Now then, shall we? *Offers arm*

Nora: We shall! *Takes his arm as the two walk down the aisle, resuming the ceremony as the audience shrug and clap for the newlyweds*

Jaune: *Lays motionless on ground, trying to regain the soul that was just sucked out of him*

Bleiss: Hi there! My name is Bleiss. And I'm gonna cut straight to the point. I wanna borrow your dick for a bit if that’s cool? I wanna just do a 360 on your tip until you grab my milky pale thighs and push me all the way down on it. Just use my small, smooth, tight little pussy as your personal fuckhole. I also wouldn’t mind if you just put your hand on my throat and forced me to look into your eyes while I’m just gasping for air while you rearrange my guts... Huh? Oh sorry, I guess I got a little uh... Not safe for work. Sorry about that. But yeah, can I ride that dick of yours? Pretty please?

RWBY: *Stares at Bleiss, shocked and appalled*

Jaune: Uh... Nice to meet you too?

Weiss: *Groans into hands from both annoyance and embarrassment*

Jaune: Alright, General, I've landed.

Ironwood: Great work, Arc. Commencing Operation Flying Arcs.

Jaune: You got it. But first, let me get something to eat. *Rummages through bag*

Ironwood: ...

Jaune: Why isn't there food in my bag?

Ironwood: Well, we had to make room for your medicine, bandages, dust-

Jaune: Ok, that's great. What the fuck am I supposed to eat?

Ironwood: ...

Jaune: No.

Ironwood: Arc.

Jaune: I'm not eating a fucking tree frog.

Ironwood: This is what you were trained for.

Jaune: Why don't you eat a Tree Frog?

Ironwood: No... I don't want to.

Jaune: Exactly. So you better be sending me some goddamn luchables.

Ironwood: Arc, those don't even exist in this world.

Jaune: I'm fighting a lady with a Grimm arm who shoots fire out of her fingertips, a mutated human Grimm hound, and Ozpin's magical, immortal, Grimm ex. But luchables, that's where we draw the line?

Ironwood: *Sighs* Fine. I'll get you your lunchables.

Jaune: *Smiles* Bitchin'

Jaune: Ren, we have to leave before they catch us, but we need to go get our weapons to stop Ironwoods crazy plan.

Ren: If we stop Ironwood’s plan, then Salem will able to reach the relics.

Jaune: *Grabs Ren’s shoulder* But if we don’t stop him all the people of Mantle will get killed. It’s like the hypocritic oath of Huntsmen Ren. To not get innocent people killed on purpose.

Ren: ... Jaune.

Jaune: Yes?

Ren: Kiss me.

Jaune: W-What?

Ren: You know you want to.

Jaune: No, I don’t.

Ren: You didn’t just want to kiss me just now?

Jaune: I didn’t.

Ren: Ok... But you’re right. Let’s grab our weapons and stop Ironwood! *Runs  over to weapon locker*

Jaune: Now we’re talking! *Follows*

Ren: Right here. *Opens an empty locker before shoving and locking Jaune inside*

Jaune: What the hell?! Ren! Open the locker!

Ren: You’ll spend the night here. General Ironwood is complicated, but he knows what’s best! *Walks away*

Jaune: Ren? Ren!

Jaune: ... I will kiss you.

Ren: Too late. The moment’s gone Jaune.

Jaune: Ren! We can do more than kiss! Other things! REEEN!!!