I Think The Problematic Thing That A Discussion Like This Tends To Raise Is The Common Conflation Of

I think the problematic thing that a discussion like this tends to raise is the common conflation of a dominant or submissive role defining how you like your sex served. You can be a sub that never bottoms or a Dom that never tops (penetratively speaking), for example.

Having an assertive/aggressive personality doesn't mean you only like the way it feels to put your dick in something. And having a chill/sensitive demeanour doesn't mean you like getting your ass pounded on the reg.

Having experienced trauma, including SA, doesn't mean you'll never be comfortable engaging in those acts consensually, whether you were into them before or not. It doesn't even mean that you wouldn't choose to engage in them regularly post-trauma as a means of reclamation, defiance, or self-destructive behaviour, simple preference for them aside.

And like, bossiness and the amount of nerve-endings in your anus do not correlate (I assume there haven't been studies, but correct me if I'm wrong).

I'm not having a go here. I don't want anyone to take it that way. I am fully anti-hate and pro-ship. But I think it's troublesome–and something that needs addressing and educating–that so much of fandom conflates Doms and subs or tough and weak with whose dick goes in whose ass.

To be clear: I fully support if someone prefers to only see Sam get dicked down by his short/bossy/butch big brother.

And I fully support if someone prefers to only read about Dean getting nailed harder than a railroad spike by his sasquatch baby bro.

I guess my hope is just that you're (general 'you' here and elsewhere–again, nothing personal, just ranting while the topic is on the table, sorry!) stuck on it for the right reasons. That is, without the implication that either of them is demeaned or less of a man or less strong, powerful, secure, etc. because of it. There's a really concerning homophobia in that, conscious or not, internalised or not, that patriarchal society and bigoted communities have been both loudly and insidiously touting for a long time, that bothers me on a fundamental level, and has also made itself apparent in sections of fandom over the years. The anti-bottom!Dean brigade alone makes me want to bite.

Anyway, I've gone off track. It's a hot-button issue for me, apparently. More simply, personally, I find it harder to believe that they would pick a role and rigidly adhere to it–Dean's a hedonist, give him pleasure wherever it comes from; Sam's open-minded, he'll go with the flow. So I see them switching depending on mood, canon events, injury, etc. One mostly giving or receiving with the occasional switch, yep, cool, they can of course have preferences of their own. But a full lean to either is the view that takes more convincing for me. I'd need a reason. And actually, sometimes that reason is the most interesting part of the story. 🤔

idk what's wrong with me, but I just CANT see Sam as dominant over Dean. Like, I totally get where it would come from, but I just cant see it with Dean. Sam does snap at Dean and is stern sometimes, but in a relationship idk. seems like Sam would be submissive for Dean. (guys I totally love blood lust Sam and souless Sam, but they seem like versions of Sam that he wants to keep away from Dean) Maybe the feisty part of him translates to a bottom that takes what he wants??? AHHH

change my mind!! there's so many bottom Dean fics but why does it seem so ooc?? I WANT TO SEE WHAT YOU SEE

DANGIT NOT AGAIN

it’s either that or nothing

I just did the thing. I have never done this particular thing before. No bangs, bingos, or challenges. I am peeing my pants. Help.

@sam-is-my-safe-word and @talltalesandbedtimestories are signing up with me. We're all going down with aboard this beautiful ship. It's good to be among friends. 🫡🥹

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woke up. logged onto this stupid website. fought the war on incest on the side of incest. and tomorrow? the same thing.

Presented without context.

"But in the face of ‘hey, I suck off your gun loaded with 2 bullets so if I accidentally kill myself, there is one for you too when you find me’

Post nut clarity is a hell of a thing"

— @sam-is-my-safe-word