![sadpandaus - I don't know what to do with my life](https://64.media.tumblr.com/75e8d7e83b81ab5b696efcb0cb2509f0/bde07ddfb3e7f350-13/s128x128u_c1/6c19e2a035bf893eb6c353ee046ad31ea51e9dc3.png)
I not a bot. Literally just a chronic werido and lurker :,(I don't really know how to communicate with people I really wish I did.Fandoms: Team Fortess 2, Rise of the TMNT, Don't Hug Me I'm Scared, and various life skills.
364 posts
Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c69baf80c082b602ac237eadee7ed94c/fb581df11f575046-5e/s500x750/e62b3cdd644e9637594029627edfa1c7abd33c83.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e39434caa93fe5217545f6e07e4f03e9/fb581df11f575046-09/s500x750/e30aaf08f13649e552883f2e1fc27fa77d02beb3.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6e1818c385fb2e441a4c56dfb4f91d21/fb581df11f575046-b3/s500x750/85dc7b7968cb5060de1d2e7eb8dac65af443abdd.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/20e898f6dd888d3e1e9cf6caa9af18fe/fb581df11f575046-30/s500x750/01e8898eb8feb3ac8c53af803e112bb72e5548d0.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/148b5df9dba4b2045f45be5bbd539e5e/fb581df11f575046-37/s500x750/4b7da8561cd158c48ae3f2e7f8fc5c3d2e3fb195.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a1a9c393c9b4bb98d4712899955bcbab/fb581df11f575046-91/s500x750/db6397a40604040f634f15bf3e0686a7958f70ca.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/cdf6bcc60b42af6fe4d67a5294b3d82e/fb581df11f575046-4f/s500x750/e3c6409a3311d8c343777a338b9fe862c9116aba.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3e5fe1732df5eff67ee8a3c448ff2502/fb581df11f575046-c0/s500x750/d0ca7ba50fff47039b7b8c1788771a98ac3060dd.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6a71271b60b825bdb31d7376ea832777/fb581df11f575046-7b/s500x750/da931b580a1f3b6b1cfa16802bd154f289a136be.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a4f42302000a20643b0e913560e46555/fb581df11f575046-d5/s500x750/f703b6514101b051cf760acc2f7e6ada93b2bf2e.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f5c509b17b1ab9cfe78ce6d2b46d7cbe/fb581df11f575046-fc/s500x750/52b2feb92bfacd055fcec6ac0af9b100b4b46726.png)
![Lead Balloon (the Tumblr Post That Saved Me)](https://64.media.tumblr.com/985e676a9b1cc34fb68587ee313f9f9e/fb581df11f575046-da/s500x750/77175f46d449a525876c9b8f18401cd21dc80a0c.png)
lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
--
no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
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Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.