Saltybean03 - Creature Feature

a wee danish suck-up

follows jorma around like a little urugrugrgugurgurgurg

They slept you alright 😂

comically large DS1 moment, I thought those pots were supposed to sleep you, guess not

Godrick getting bored and making small, grafted homunculi he takes to calling his "little graftlings"

Cursed little bundles of hands and arms just casually rolling around the castle like family pets, spooking the guards and giving visitors heart attacks

Godrick names each and every one after himself and they swarm when he shakes a bag of treats

They like to be carried around by their dad and they crawl all over him whenever he's idle. They cover him like a blanket when he sleeps in his bed, and they fetch things for him that are far away

They also annoy gostoc periodically

If elden ring bosses worked at popular chains..

Mohg - Starbucks (is happy to make that complicated latte)

Morgott - Michael's (knows where everything is and quietly roams the aisles)

Radahn - Home Depot (the employee everyone trusts with the heavy shit)

Rennala - Barnes and Nobles (has a new favorite book every time you see her)

Malenia - Waffle House (doesn't fuck around with unruly customers)

Rykard - Walmart (shows up looking crazy like the customers that walk in)

Godskin Duo - Hot Topic (I'm not elaborating further)

Godrick - Lowe's (stands by the door to greet people and make sure they don't steal)

Maliketh - Spencer's (listen.. he's already wearing a blindfold)

Messmer - Chick Fil A - (he's one more "can I have a refund" away from an altercation)

Reblog with your own versions!

next cosplay I'm gonna do is what I call a shadow gnome. entirely made up but its a decrepit leper hunched over, covered in a raggedy black drape, with a scorched staff of willow, and a pointy hat because gnomes need those. yeah, it's gonna be awesome

i'll be offering travelers suspicious wares for pieces of their soul, so keep your head on a swivel

Drew a rough estimate of said cosplay, dump truck likely WON'T be included in the sacred texts