Suplex Supperdox

Suplex Supperdox

Pairing: Sam x Max x Reader

Words: 1389

Warnings: GORE, mentions of sex, angst(barely), but other than that it's pretty tame, nothing sexual actually happens.

I HAVE NOT PROOFREAD THIS, don't except it to be perfect. And unlike my other 6000 words something smut fic this one is obviously a bit shorter.

Also this fic is obviously gender-neutral. Come get your shit simps.

Summary:

Going on a date with Sam and Max, you find yourself in an unexpected situation and having a conversation with them about your job.

Sounds of guts and blood getting thrown and splattered out of the body fills the dark and wide forest. Max's grin getting wider and wider as he used his weird saw bat to shred the already dead corpse. You helping along with your sharp axe you got at a market a long time ago and Sam lovingly looking at the two of you. Kind've in the sense of- oh I dunno "look at these two dorks" or "they'll never change will they?" sort of way, kinda not really at the same time. Point is, I forgot the word and now I'm making up lines.

You hit the corpse on its shoulder just perfectly slicing it off of its place, creating a grotesque pop and crunch sound as well as a squelching sound from the flesh. You quirk an eyebrow and grab onto the arm with your already bloodied hand. You look at it with great intent. Examining it you found a particular bone that piqued your interest. You stared at it until delicately putting your fingers around the head of the humerus popping out of the bicep. After studying it you roughly rip the humerus out of the flesh making a strange squishing sort of sound and a twist of the flesh once having held it together.

Bone in hand you fondle with it for a while, wanting to see how it feels more thoroughly. The texture of it was both rough yet smooth, the blood and meat still coating it making its texture even better. Whenever you would touch the flesh would make a small sludge and jiggling sound. The blood dripping off and onto the dirt-filled ground accompanying the air as well as the sounds of bones cracking from where Max was, making the experience even better. It sent a shiver through your spine. You relished in it.

You finally wrap your palm around the bone and let your hands slump down, instead turning your attention towards Max and Sam. "You know, when you two said "date" this wasn't the kind of date I was expecting." Max continues to repeatedly shred the body but his ear twitching up shows that he was listening. Sam on the other hand was giving all of his attention to you, not even looking back at the corpse. He looked a bit worried.

"What, a-are you not enjoying it?" Sam asks albeit anxiously. Max seems to momentarily stop before resuming again, this time going a bit quicker and a slight twitch from his grin showing. A look of shock immediately enters your face. You wave your hands frantically infront of you.

"What? No! It was just a bit unexpected. Well, now that I think about it, it's not that unexpected and more less expected but-"

"Were you expectin' some sort of classic boring ol' restaurant date? You know we stopped doing those when that cannibal restaurant downtown in the dark alley closed." Max's grin turned into a irritated expression while Sam looked anxious. But why? You sigh and take a deep breath. Just as you were about to speak Max interrupts you.

"Yeush, is it really that bad being with us? The only thing you do is work, work and work! We're getting- ugh yuck I hate saying this but-"

"We're starting to get worried (Y/N)." Sam interrupts Max. Max let's out a sigh of relief. "Thank you Sam." You quirked an eyebrow at the two, confused by they're statements.

Worried about you? Honestly you never knew the word "worried" and "we're" would ever come out of their mouths considering.. well, them. Yet here you were, hearing those words in an entire sentence.

You knew you worked a lot and was almost always exhausted after the day finished but it wasn't THAT bad.

...Wasn't it?

You sighed and simply shared eye contact with the two. Showing them some sort of attention in the means of them not completely ignoring you (or zoning out), Max was one example of this. "I'm sorry guys but killing is a hard job. You know, being an assassin and all that. If I don't give it my all I might mess the job up or worse get caught. You know how it is-"

"Then invite us to follow along sometime!" Max suggested, interrupting your sentence. You blinked and gave both him and Sam a deadpan. But you didn't open your mouth yet to speak, knowing very well whatever Max was going to say, he wasn't done yet. "You know how much I like violence! I wouldn't mind the blood and neither would Sam. We can even help and cheer you up so you don't get all tired and torn when you get home."

You chuckled and rolled your eyes. "I know you do. But as much as I would appreciate the help you two aren't exactly the trustworthy type." The wind blew against your face getting harsher, but they didn't seem to notice it at all. Max seemed dead set on convincing you to loosen up and agree with him and Sam simply went along. He looked a bit agitated and disappointed at the bunny, probably because he wanted to take the more gentler, long approach. While Max just wanted to get it over with as quickly as possible.

"Besides, I don't feel as if it's tiring to the point where it's unhealthy! I can still hang out and go out with you guys-" "We barely even got you here, (Y/N)." Sam interrupted, now also being more active in the conversation. Max continued Sam's sentence. "You literally whined to us and said you probably couldn't come." Your eyes widened and you tugged at yourself, averting your gaze from the two. They both had a weird look of determination.

You know for a bunch of dorks that barely seemed to waste time on affection or sappy stuff, they were awfully needy. But maybe they were right. You had found yourself spending less time with them and instead found yourself spending more time with your bed.

You cringed and your face quickly contorted into a look of defeat. You sighed and simply nodded, agreeing with their argument. Yet you still found yourself always admitting defeat quite oftenly when it came to them. Maybe it was because you were in love with them. That made you weak and bend over to your knees at any time to them.

Although this was far stray away from how you acted in sex. You were a lot more.. dominant then.

But this isn't the time to think about that, was it?

"Yeah, you guys are right." Immediately their eyes lit up. Sam one of relief and Max out of.. something else you couldn't quite piece together. "I should really take it more easy with my job." Max hopped and grabbed ahold of your hands, looking up to you in an instant.

"Does that mean we get to come to your job and watch a writhing living body tremble and churn while it slowly gets the life drained out of it?!" Max asked rather excitedly. His eyes had that usual glint of crazy. Meanwhile Sam chuckled and looked endeared by Max's excitement. You laughed and pressed a quick kiss on his mouth- err teeth. You then quickly booped him on his nose while laughing.

"Absolutely not, sweetheart." And just like that he quickly deflated, causing you to snicker at his overly dramatic reaction. You petted him softly and simply grinned at him.

"Of course you can pay me a visit at my job, honeybun."

Just as quickly as he had deflated did he sprung back to life. Sam seemed pretty excited too, his tail wagging from behind. You smiled and gestured him to come closer towards you. He happily obliged and rather excitedly came over to you. You shared the same kiss you had given Max towards Sam, except this time it wasn't on his teeth, but on his nose. He blushed and you blushed too, feeling the heat flush over your cheeks.

You turn back to the body and smirked. "Now I believe we were doing something, weren't we?" Almost instinctively they nodded and you giggled, turning back to the corpse.

Yeah, you wouldn't change a single thing for this.

Next part of Blood Across The Carpet coming soon <3333

More oneshots coming!

I'm soon going to come out with another Sam and Max fic! This one however involves angst but it still has some fluff. It's probably not coming THAT soon though seeing as I've been pumping out short fics and keep getting idea after idea on ao3.

Anyways, steer clear of the fic once it comes out Sam and Max simps!

SAM AND MAX

Blood Across The Carpet (SMUT, GORE)

Sam x Reader x Max (ROMANTIC HEADCANONS)

Suplex Supperdox (GORE, ANGST MENTIONS OF SEX)

Sam x Reader x Max (ROMANTIC HEADCANONS)

• Fucking hell, do you have death wish? You got together, with THESE TWO?! Damn, that's surprising. Usually they never gain interest on ANY other people. Let alone romantically or other weird blissful feelings. Yet here you are.

• You three are a literal power couple. Okay fine, maybe not on the "literal" sense but certainly powerful. You, being the peace keeper, although secretly causing mischief behind the scenes. Sam, being the the logical and sensible one, but secretly enjoying yours and Max's violent acts towards humanity. Max, being the mischievous menace to society as per usual and partaking in sadistic acts regularly. In a short way of describing him. Gremlin, lagomorth, psychopath and etc.

• Look, they're not really physically affectionate. Sure, Max is very physical and touchy but it's not affectionate. (Well, I guess it could be seen as affectionate.) Max would even say he's uncomfortable with physical affection. However, he tends to be more affectionate indoors, clingy and many other adjectives. Just don't be too physical with him unless it involves gratuitous acts of violence. He only gets uncomfortable if you (or anyone, really) touches him. Fine with touching others, unnerved when someone touches him.

• Max tends to nuzzle against you, hopping on your shoulders and leaning down for an upside down kiss. He can be very gentle and cute with it. Or he can let impulses take the best of him and thrash against you. He can be VERY rough with his affection when impluse takes over. Maybe even clawing against you, biting you (hickeys) or just otherwise hurting you. (Unless, well masochist.) He is also a cuddler, weirdly? Tries to be big spoon. (Succeeds a lot, actually. Obviously.)

• Sam is a bit different. He's a lot more affectionate, but just like Max he is more affectionate indoors. Sure, a few hugs here and there when on the job or while in a case but otherwise most of the acts are done in closed doors. But- fuck, is he affectionate. He is absolutely adorable when he's affectionate. Nuzzles, hugs and so many kisses. Also his little tail wag is just- the cherry on top man. He is also SUCH a cuddler. (He's also the little spoon, fucking bottom sub.)

• Sam has an insane vocabulary. He will give you the weirdest of compliments with the most unusual words. Sometimes you aren't even sure if it's a compliment. The only way you know it's supposed to be a compliment is by his tone.

• If you're a sadomasochist, you three will get into a bunch of acts. Tearing a man's skin off, gouging someone's eyes out- you get the idea! However, most of the times it's you and Max participating in these acts while Sam does sometimes.

• Puns, and LOTS of wordplay with these two. These two will constantly joke and make morbid jokes. With you in the gang it only multiplies.

• Max enjoys being thrown into a wall and many other sadomasochist acts. If you can, do it as much as you can per day. For some reason he get more snarky and aggressive than usual when you haven't hurt him enough. Aggressive to OTHER people that is. Which usually leads to things and more unexplainable things.

• Despite the fact that they're the "police" they participate in illegal acts almost everyday. Then again it's not that surprising considering.. well them. (Usually it's selling organs to the black market *COUGH* *COUGH* but let's not talk about that.)

• You three usually go to this weird restaurant Max enjoys. The restaurant is err.. well questionable to the very least. But you've gotta say you've come to love the place and so has Sam.

• Look, with these two on your tail there will ALWAYS be adventure no matter how insane it sounds.

Nvm the fic is coming out sooner than I though since I decided to speed run it.