If Youre One Of Those People Who Thinks Executive Dysfunction Only Happens For Things We Dont Like (school,

If you’re one of those people who thinks executive dysfunction only happens for things we don’t like (school, cleaning,) then please consider the fact that I’ve been meaning to plug my phone in for 20 minutes and I’m now at 2% and still putting it off to write this post ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

List of books everyone should read

Howl’s moving castle by Diana Wynne Jones

Chrestomanci series by Diana Wynne Jones

Carry On by Rainbow Rowell

The Parasol Protectorate and Custard Protocol series by Gail Carriger

The Raven Cycle series by Maggie Stiefvatar 

The Percy Jackson and Heroes of Olympus series by Rick Riordan

The Artemis Fowl series by Eoin Colfer

Regency Romance books by Georgette Heyer

The Hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy series by Douglas Adams

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett

Discworld series by Terry Pratchett

The Princess Bride by William Goldman

dealing with the worst case scenario

your condom breaks

you feel a lump on your breast

your friends are ignoring you

you’re stranded on an island 

you got rejected by a crush

you get into a car accident

you got stung by a bee/wasp

you got fired from your job

you’re in an earthquake

your tattoo gets infected

your house is on fire

you’re lost in the woods

you get arrested abroad

you get robbed

your partner cheated on you

you’re on a ship that’s sinking

you fall into ice

you’re stuck in an elevator

you hit a deer with your car

you have food poisoning

your pet passed away

you fall off of a horse

you or your friend has alcohol poisoning

you have toxic shock syndrome

your house has a gas leak

Tricks for Perceivers: ORGANISATION AND TIME MANAGEMENT

The basis of the first part of this post is that perceivers are most content when they can do stuff whenever they feel like doing them. The idea is therefore to trick your mind into thinking you feel like doing it instead of it being forced. Here’s how you can do that:

1. Change the To Do title to Would Like To Do/Could Do/May Do or something along those lines, whatever you heart desires Though this doesn’t particularly work for me it could for you so I threw it in there. It’s pretty self explanatory - it helps you perceive the tasks as if they’re desired instead of demanded.

2. Switch location (and keep switching it) As long at the place you’re doing the task at is giving you that feeling of novelty that makes you a little bit excited, that’s great. Once it gets too familiar, however, switch it. It doesn’t have to be a drastic change, it just has to be a different place - e.g. a different room, a different table at a library, the opposite side of the table that gives you a slightly different view, different cafe… I wouldn’t change the location until it feels too familiar though because this nevertheless is about keeping the interest higher while still primarily focusing on the task.

3. Work when you otherwise wouldn’t I sometimes wake up at 5 am to study for an hour and a half before I head to school. This is not because I’d enjoy waking up early since I generally love staying up pretty late but because if you decide to do something at a time that’s unusual for you, you’ll probably feel ahead of the game and as if you have your life put together. It’s literally just about putting yourself in the mood for being productive.

4. Play pretend Actually getting ready, dressing into professional clothes or something cozy yet still put together and everything that goes along with that doesn’t only make you appear like you’re a productive and organised individual, it also makes you feel that way which will likely boost your motivation.

However, you’re still a perceiver, so… How to not go crazy:

5. Schedule the “no schedule” time Make it long enough so it actually feels like you have some time without any limitations regarding what to do and when to do it. This is especially important when you have hectic schedules. It may seem inconvenient and as if you’re wasting your time if you do that during the hectic week but if you keep following insane schedules for too long you’ll eventually burn out and end up throwing away even more time. Make it possible so that one afternoon or whichever long enough part of the day in the midst of all the crazy days you’ll have nothing scheduled.

6. Don’t plan, visualise  Visualising allows you to imagine how you could spend your time in the future. This doesn’t put on the pressure to follow a strict schedule but it still makes you loosely determine what should be done the next day and when approximately. For me writing down a To Do list can be somewhat cool as long as I make it visually appealing but following it is a huge motivation drainer. So if I know that there are things that have to be done that already demand much attention and focus (e.g. studying), I avoid writing anything down, I stick to just having a loose schedule in my head.

7. The general rule When there are things scheduled for you, do not overschedule in the free time that’s left for you. When there’s little to nothing scheduled for you, schedule stuff for yourself to stay productive but only make 1 or 2 things per day strict. And not long. Add other stuff on the go.

8. Understand when you can work for a short time and when you just have to keep going to finish whatever you have to do  Generally perceivers handle quicker and shorter tasks much easierly than the lengthy ones but sometimes you cannot avoid the long study sessions unless you planned ahead to avoid studying one day before the exam… but that’s less likely I’d say. Some people suggest to take breaks but beware of falling into a void of distractions and end up searching up for like an hour (or more) some random things that suddenly become so interesting. Once you stop doing the boring task and allow yourself to do something more fun you have to trick yourself into following a schedule all over again and that’s a pain. If I know I have a very focus-oriented busy day ahead of me I’ll prepare mentally the day before and just try to make the best of it, avoiding the breaks as much as possible.

Apartment hacks masterpost

Kitchen

How to clean up kitchen (particularly the sink, burnt pots and small aplliances)

How to take care of kitchen stuff so that it lives longer

10 commandments of a clutter-free kitchen

Organizing kitchen mini masterpost

5 things to do in the kitchen before you go to bed

What is soapy bowl and why it’s awesome

How to organize your fridge (also here, here and here)

Thins you should know about your fridge

Adding more storage space in a tiny kitchen

Cleaning

Lots of cleaning tutorials and tips. And some more

How to clean up pantry

How to make your house look cleaner than it really is

How to wash pillows

Cleaning the bathroom

How to clean the nastiest places (and get rid of bad smells, etc.)

Floor-to-celling guide to spring cleaning

Recaulking your bathtub

Cleaning grout

How to dispose of toxic waste

Cleaning the medicine cabinet

How to make chores more fun

You mustn’t skip these chores, but you can delay these if you’re busy

Easily forgotten things that you should clean/replace

Why you need a catch-up day

Small cleaning tasks to do in under 15 minutes (also here)

Looking for a flat/moving

First apartment checklist

Where too look during an apartment hunt (and some more tips)

Negotiate these things with your landlord

What to do first in a new place

What do clean before moving out

How not to get crazy during moving flats

How to downgrade to a smaller place

Organisation, storage

10 habits for better home organisation

How to store off-season items

10 storage ideas for small spaces (more here)

Storage secret weapons

How to organise your closet

Things to do before twice-yearly closet switchout

How to store and maintain your sweaters

Decluttering

Why it feels great

How to get rid of clutter

How to declutter (not only a flat)

What needs to be thrown away from your flat

How to let go of the things you no longer need

Things you own too many of; you can throw away these too

Decuttering the bathroom

Decluterring masterpost

Decorating

Projects for every room in your home/flat

Add style to your home

DIY decorating ideas

How to use negative space

4 common decorating mistakes and how to avoid them

Questions to ask yourself before buying something new

How to choose furniture that’ll be easier to clean

Season-specific tips

Things to do before the cold season

Household hacks for winter

Preparing for Christmas

Green thumb 101

How to take care of succulents

Never kill a plant again

Living alone / Sharing a flat

How not to be lonely when living alone

12 things you can only do when home alone

What you learn by living alone

Things you learn while sharing a flat

What to pack when leaving for a dorm

How to seamlessly share a kitchen (or a flat in general)

Safety issues to discuss with flatmates

Benefits of living with strangers

And also how to turn a house into a home

hey, here’s a radical idea: someone saying “no” when you ask for sex is never an act of abuse, and saying otherwise in a conversation about rape victims is deplorable.

if there are other things that were done to you that were abusive, your trauma is always valid. but “not having sex with me” can never be added to the abuser’s list of offenses, because you are never owed sex. 

 if your partner says the reason they said ‘no’ was that you’re ugly, or stupid, or any number of demoralizing things- that is an act of abuse. but the act of abuse is in attacking your sense of self worth, and not in refusing sex. 

the abusive act is that your abuser attributed their ‘no’ to a supposed lack of worthiness on your part. but denying sex in itself is never an act of abuse. when this occurs, you point out that you had your self worth attacked.

 you don’t go around preaching that saying ‘no’ to sex is an abuse tactic, and you especially don’t do it in the chronological middle of a discussion regarding people being pressured into sex.