. (-)

  — ★ 𝐖𝐄𝐀𝐊 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐓. (𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄-𝐀)

☆ — “S.. SORRY…. ARE YOU ANGRY?”

SYNOPSIS : Everyone fears them, but who do they fear? (+ bonus text messages✨)

FEATURING : Umemiya Hajime, Sakura Haruka, Tomiyama Choji, Togame Jo, Takiishi Chika x f!reader

Read the SECOND PART with Suo Hayato, Kiryu Mitsuki, Hiragi Toma, Kaji Ren, and Endo Yamato here!

UMEMIYA HAJIME

Everyone knows by now that one of Umemiya Hajime’s love languages is teasing. Once you get that man’s attention on you, he will not stop pestering you until the end of the world, showering you with his attention to try to get yours.

But sometimes, he can be too much.

“Wha- Hajime!” You’re peacefully reading the manga you just bought when it’s suddenly snatched from your hand. The sun beams on Umemiya’s face as he sticks out his tongue playfully, a beautiful smile adorning his features. 

You glare up at him, or rather, at his right arm who’s now holding your manga. You make  a futile attempt to swipe it away, but the white haired man only holds it up higher away from your reach. The pages are now flipping away and you grimace, knowing that you’ve lost the page you were reading earlier. And it was such a good scene, too…

“Give it back!” 

But Umemiya only grins wider, stretching his long arms higher and higher. Next to him, his friends shake their heads in disbelief at his childishness. “Then take it baaack~” He can’t lie, he loves seeing your pretty eyes shining in anger. He loves seeing all your expressions, but he can’t deny that he has a mean streak in him. It’s satisfying to tease you and watch you get all flustered and annoyed.

“Umemiya Hajime!”

His friends looked away upon hearing the murderous tone in your voice, knowing that their leader is completely and utterly done for.

“You have three seconds to give me my manga back.”

Umemiya can be a bit oblivious, but he’s not stupid. Slumping his shoulders, he gives you a look resembling a kicked puppy and gingerly hands you the manga back. “O-okay… don’t be mad at me…” He pouts, but is met with a deadly glare.

“See?! Now I have to find what page I was reading!”

Nervous, he tries to help you but doesn’t know how, so he resorts to stuttering next to you, making you more annoyed. “S.. sorry…. Are you angry?”

“Heck yes I’m angry!”

You dodge his kisses, only relenting when he literally kneels down in front of you and begs you to forgive him, resting his head on your lap.

SAKURA HARUKA

“Help!”

A woman’s voice breaks through the day’s tranquility, followed by sounds of feet thudding on the ground. Several shop owners and pedestrians turned to look at what’s going on, their brows furrowed when they found out that it was another pickpocket.

The young man in question is already taking off, a woman’s wallet clutched between his arm and torso, speeding down the street, a victorious smirk on his face. However, just as he’s rounding the corner, his face comes into contact with a fist, causing him to fall to the ground.

Rubbing his nose crossly, he looks up to see a white and black haired boy, towering over him with his arms crossed intimidatingly in front of his chest. His lips are pursed in a straight line and his eyes are burning. He looks scary, if it wasn’t for the cute purse that hangs on his arm. “What the heck?!” He spits out, quickly getting to his feet to make an escape.

An arm shoots out in front of him. “That wallet. Give it back.”

“Mind your own business, boy!” He moves to push him away, but he effortlessly takes his arm and twists it behind his back, making him yelp in pain. The pickpocket tries to hit his assaulter’s head, but is instead whacked on the head with an object. He flops down on the ground, holding an aching head with an aching arm, the stolen wallet quickly forgotten.

Sakura Haruka rolls his eyes at the weakling in front of him before picking up the wallet and returning it to its rightful owner, who thanks him over and over again. 

Just another day as Furin’s guardian.

“Sakura Haruka!”

Sakura flinches when he hears his full name being called out in a harsh tone, already knowing who it is without having to turn his head. He’s practically shaking in his boots when he finally faces you, hands on your hips, glaring daggers at your boyfriend.

“Did you just whack someone in the head using my purse?!”

Gulping, Sakura’s hands move to pat your purse, trying to return it to its original state (it now has a small dent from where it comes into contact with the pickpocket’s head) but fails miserably. “Umm..! Please wait a moment…” He grumbles, gently hammering your purse to fix the dent, finally succeeding as the purse returns to its form with a satisfying ‘plop!’

“You…” Taking big steps towards your boyfriend, you glare at him with rage, grabbing him by his collar. 

It is truly a sight: the Sakura Haruka, who usually holds other people by their collar, is now having his own collar grabbed by a girl, and instead of being offended, he only looks mortified.

“I-I fixed it! Here, good as new!”

“It’s not the same! You’re an idiot!”

Not far from there, Kiryu holds up his phone, recording the whole thing. He stops the video when the two of you finally stop arguing and Sakura slings an arm around you, giving you a peck on the cheek before turning beet red. Chuckling to himself, he opens up the gang group chat.

TOMIYAMA CHOJI

Even after his fight with Furin High’s Umemiya, Tomiyama Choji is still an enigma. He looks like someone who wears his heart on his sleeve at first glance, but no amount of bubbly cheers and close-eyed smiles can tell a person what’s really on his mind.

Like right now.

The Shishitoren guys are chilling at the Ori, chatting and opening up bags of chips. The mood around them has greatly improved and they are now much more comfortable with each other. Tomiyama and Togame join them, sitting a bit further up, but still engaging in conversation.

“So, where’s the little princess?” Togame casually asks in an attempt to make small talk, but pauses when he feels his friend stiffen up.

Tomiyama smiles, but his eyes betray him.

“Umm.. is everything okay between you two?”

“Of course!” The Shishitoren leader beams, “Why wouldn’t it be?”

The guys in the front lower their voices, partly out of nervousness but also out of curiosity. They have often seen Tomiyama’s girlfriend hanging around at the Ori, laughing at his jokes and matching his energy. But not today.

“Well..” Togame ponders whether he should pursue the matter, but he’s actually a bit curious as well, so he presses on. “She usually comes here after school ends..”

At this, Tomiyama’s smile finally fades. He glances at the other guys, who instantly snaps their head away as if they weren’t at all eavesdropping earlier, then glares at his friend openly. “... What of it? She doesn’t have to come here every single day, does she?”

Togame knows now that he’s touched a nerve, so he drops it. Sighing, he opens up his phone, something that he rarely ever does, and decides to save the day by contacting a very special person.

You burst into the Ori not long afterwards and Tomiyama immediately bolts to you, tackling you down and muttering apologies in between sobs. When you finally forgive him, he gives you the brightest smile and kisses your cheek, pulling you up from the ground and guiding you to sit down next to him, his arm encircling your waist.

TOGAME JO

Togame Jo is a calm person. A very, very calm person. But calmness doesn’t equate to patience, and the Shishitoren guys know that better than anyone. It’s no easy feat to be the second-in-command, especially with someone like Tomiyama as the leader.

Togame rules with an iron fist. It’s true that he has mellowed down after the altercation with Furin, but the fact that he is intimidating remains standing. Now, he’s not even fazed when he argues with Tomiyama and stands his ground stubbornly, something that he usually avoids before fighting Furin High. That is why everyone still interacts with him cautiously, especially when they get a feeling that he’s in a bad mood.

Today is such a day.

The guys witnessed first hand how badly Togame and Tomiyama’s bickers can go, both sides unrelentingly stubborn. They’ve stopped fighting each other, but the tension is still there.

Just then, a girl walks up to them, an annoyed look on her face as she proceeds to… lecture Togame?

“Tomiyama told me that you threw the first punch!”

“Huh?!” Togame glares at his friend, who returns his glare with a victorious grin. But he can’t say anything because it was true, he did throw the first punch— he got Tomiyama good.

“I told you to solve your arguments with cool heads, not fists!” The girl is you, and you’re now scrunching your nose in frustration at the two guys in front of you.

Aruma, Kanuma, and some of their friends are hiding behind a wall as they shamelessly peep. They thought that Togame would certainly explode right about now. He has looked irritated all day, just got into a fistfight with his friend, and now he’s being lectured by some girl? Their friend, perhaps, but still… lecturing the Togame Jo is a pretty nerve-wracking sight.

Imagine their surprise when instead of exploding in anger, Togame lets out a small huff and looks at the ground. “You never take my side… is your boyfriend Choji or me?”

Tomiyama roars in laughter when you guiltily try to cheer him up, the previous arguments forgotten. He’s still laughing as he snaps pictures of the two of you. You’re hugging Togame tightly, face buried in his chest, but unbeknownst to you, Togame is now smirking as he rests his chin on top of your head.

TAKIISHI CHIKA

Takiishi Chika is an all-around scary guy. He always looks two seconds away from socking someone in the face, he beats up everyone who so much as looks at him the wrong way, and he’s made it clear he isn’t interested in making friends.

Lately, though, another person has been added to his entourage. Not another scary guy like Endo Yamato, but rather a beautiful girl who looks like a perfectly law-abiding citizen.

The first time you show up, Endo is damn sure that you won’t last more than a week. Either you get too scared, make a mistake and get punched in the face, or Takiishi will grow bored of you and tell you to stay out of his way.

Neither happened.

He’s been counting the days: it’s been exactly four months, and he notices that you have only been getting closer to Takiishi. But perhaps, perhaps, today will be the day that you break.

You’re standing your ground fearlessly, staring at him angrily. Takiishi, as usual, returns your stare with a stoic one. “Why don’t you want to spend more time with me?!” Your face is all scrunched up, your hands balled up into fists.

Takiishi blinks. Once. Twice. He clearly disagrees with your earlier statement, but he doesn’t know how to respond, so he remains silent. But he clearly made the wrong decision because your frustration grows, tears glistening in the corner of your eyes. Surprised and unsure how to react, Takiishi opens and closes his mouth mutely.

“So it’s true, then. Endo was right.” You sigh in defeat, tears now running down your face, “You don’t actually love me. You like him more than me.”

Endo nearly chokes when Takiishi snaps his head towards his direction, his face dark and eyes flickering in pure anger. He’s sure that Takiishi would stomp his way to him and bash his head in, if it weren’t for your sobs.

He watches, learning his lesson about messing with you when Takiishi quietly pulls you into his arms, calming you down by rubbing your head gently. His movements are stiff and awkward, but even an idiot can tell that he treats you like a treasure, letting your tears wet his black jacket.

But it wasn’t finished yet— Takiishi kindly makes sure that Endo completely learns his lesson when he beats him half to death, threatening him to never talk to you that way ever again.

NOTES : Wind Breaker fandom, I offer tribute!!!

“Well, hello there.”

This was for celebrating 3K on insta! :D

It’s Him or Grim…and It’s Grim 

Ignoring him to take care of Grim feat: Sebek · Azul · Jade · Riddle genre: fluff note: gn!reader, no pronouns are used, relationships up to interpretation, some of the TWST boys basically taking the L or getting catblocked, 

piece of advice, never bring someone like me to an animal cafe for a date cuz I will ignore you. Also, don't question why I keep changing the banners. I just love messing with pictures of our handsome TWST boys <3

Sebek didn’t say it out loud but he was excited over you visiting him during his club activities. He’s proud to show off his skills on his steed and present his knightly appearance to you. 

Unfortunately, he’s not doing too well when he’s constantly getting into screaming contests with an uninvited guest…Grim 

He didn’t know why he was so surprised though. He should have predicted that wherever you intend to go, the cat-shaped menace will surely follow in curiosity and make a ruckus while he’s here. 

“Nyah, I can ride these crazy horses no problem!” 

“I will not allow it. Beginners need to learn the basics before even attempting to-“ 

Before Sebek could finish, Grim already went ahead and climbed on top of a nearby horse. But, your feline companion accidentally pressed his claws too deeply into the poor horse’s skin and spooked the large animal. 

“Grim!” You screamed when you saw your dormmate being pushed off the horse’s back and landing on his head. You ran to his side while Sebek did his best to calm the horse before it started to run amuck and cause more issues. 

Sebek wanted to scold the reckless cat monster for his actions but he bit his tongue and sighed in exasperation instead since it looked like the konk on the head left Grim feeling woozy. 

“I should bring Grim to the infirmary” you worriedly look at your companion as you cradle his body in your arms. “I’ll see you another time, Sebek. I’m so sorry for disturbing your club time” 

Sebek panicked over your departure, telling you that you could just come back after bringing Grim to the infirmary. He planned so many things today for you, to introduce you to his trusted steed, show off his horse riding skills, and maybe even let you ride with him. 

But you had to decline, wanting to stay by Grim’s side until he feels better. You gave an apologetic smile before you took off with Grim in your arms. You missed the look of utter defeat on the lime-haired freshman. You managed to get out of earshot as Sebek started shouting to himself, declaring to learn from his defeat against that cursed cat. His clubmates however did hear him loud and clear, Riddle looking over in confusion and Silver silently rooting for his fellow knight-in-training. 

“I admit my loss in this battle but I will prevail in our next encounter, Grim. I swear on my honor!”

Azul plans ahead in everything, be it his next business venture or a deal to be made…and definitely when meeting you. He wanted the most optimal results from this meeting he planned with you. He made sure he reserved the best spot in his restaurant that showcases him in the best lighting, the food is to your taste and the ambience sets the mood to his satisfaction. He took everything into consideration. But of course, things don't always go the way he wanted to.

Like Grim coming along with you to your engagement with him. 

“I’m sorry, Azul. Grim was bored in the dorms and Ace and Deuce had make-up classes today” you apologized, Grim in your lap as he gobbled the food Azul had picked out for you. “I hope it doesn’t inconvenience you too much” 

“Of course not,” He lied. “I’m more than generous enough to extend hospitality for even surprise visitors” 

“I gotta hand it to ya, Octavanilla guy! Your food is super delish!” Grim offers his compliments. “I can’t get enough of it!” 

Grim really couldn’t. He ordered seconds and thirds (RIP to your wallet) and didn’t stop himself from practically inhaling the food the moment it reached the table. It was a real mood killer for Azul. The silver-haired entrepreneur couldn’t find his opening and soon he’s left to watch you from the sidelines as your focus was solely on the fattened cat who is grumbling in your lap. 

“Nyahhhh…my tummy hurts~” Grim cried as his stomach ached. You let out a sigh as you did your best to soothe the monstrous feline. 

“I’m pretty sure it’s because you just ate your weight in food” you quipped which earned a weak whine from Grim. 

Azul just couldn’t believe his plan went to ruins by simply adding Grim into the equation. Any attempt for your attention is ripped away by Grim’s loud munching or simply you turning away from his gaze to reprimand the messy feline as you cleaned his dirty face. 

He needs a new plan, and a contingency plan should anything like today happen again. He needs back ups to distract him, perhaps Kalim- 

“Azul” your voice snapped him out from his thoughts. “I might need some money after how much Grim ate today. Do you think I could pick up some shifts in the lounge?” 

Oh, Azul could work with that. 

“Oh no, it seems that Grim has left you in quite a predicament. Come, vent your woes to me”

Jade was excited to show his treasured terrarium collection to you. It would be delightful if you were to grow to share his interest caring for these fascinating flora, something only you and he would share in this whole campus. Imagine…Just you and him alone together, standing close to each other as you admire his projects. 

Well, that’s what he imagined…but often fantasies do not match reality as he was not alone with you as he had hoped. 

“These are some funky lookin’ mushrooms ya got here” Grim narrowed his eyes on one of the colorful mushrooms that seems to have just fully matured. “Henchhuman, you think they’re edible?” 

“I personally don’t think so but you should ask Jade” you turned to Jade, the first time in a while he would add if he were the petty type. But of course he wasn’t. 

“I believe so but I have yet to test my theory on that” Jade smiled down at the small creature which sent shivers down his back. “Are you volunteering yourself for a taste test?”

“Nyah, as if!” Grim yelled out as he backed away from the menacing aura Jade was exuding. In his panic, the monster student accidentally ran his paw over a pair of scissors which snagged his fur and pulled from his skin painfully. Grim let out a painful yelp which made you rush over to your dormmate’s side, worriedly looking over your friend. “Grim, what happened?” 

“My beautiful fur! It got cut!” Grim made an inaccurate assumption but to his defense, it did sting really bad and you could see some of his fur on the pair of scissors. So, you proceeded to check over Grim’s paw for any wounds. 

Jade stood in the sidelines as he watched you handle the monster’s paw, gently sweeping the fur to check for any blood, even blowing on it to ease the poor creature’s pain. The eel merman slightly drooped his shoulders, this was his loss. 

Walking over, Jade picked up the offending scissors that caused all this fuss. His heterochromatic eyes inspected the tool as he admitted that it was getting dull and he should replace them soon or something like this may occur again… Oh? 

You heard something fall behind you which made you turn to know the source. You saw the pair of scissors that Jade picked up back on the floor and your ocean-haired senior was holding one of his hands in the other. “Jade?” 

“Oh dear, it seems that I have accidentally nicked myself as well” Jade looked at you with his best pleading eyes, holding his hand towards you. “Could you help me?” 

“…can’t you do it yourself?” 

“Ah, it hurts quite a bit I don’t think I could focus enough to check my wound” Jade sighed as he clutched his poor hand in his own. He looked to you with pleading eyes and despite your suspicions, you accepted to help your senior and carefully took Jade’s “injured” hand into your own. With your eyes focusing on searching for this supposed wound, Jade smiled as he shared a glance with Grim behind you which scared the poor creature. 

“It seems I have quite the challenge on my hands. How interesting” 

Riddle worked up the courage to invite you to spend the day with him alone and when you accepted, he made sure that everything was perfect. Only Trey was aware of your intimate outing since he offered to take up any non-urgent Housewarden work during Riddle’s day with you so no one else was aware that you and Heartslabyul's leader were meeting. 

Everything was going smoothly, albeit a little stiff in the beginning. Riddle was shocked by how nervous he was. The teacup in his hand was shaking in his grip as he sat just across from you from the small table. 

Eventually the atmosphere settled and soon the two of you relaxed and chatted over trivial topics, enjoying each other’s presence over anything. But alas, good things must come to an end, but not in the way Riddle had planned. Instead, your date was interrupted when the two of you heard a loud call of your name from a distance, from a very familiar voice

“Henchhuman, you went ahead and got grub without me?!” Grim accused you, immediately climbing onto your lap without your complaint. This was his natural seat after all. Then, more voices were heard coming close.

“Grim, there you are. Don’t run off like that- Ahh Housewarden!” Like a storm, Ace and Deuce walked into the once private space while running after Grim then froze in place when they noticed their senior, who seemed to be a really bad mood right now. “Sorry, Housewarden. Grim said he smelled something good and went running over” 

Apparently, Grim was getting hungry and since Ace and Deuce were short on money, the cat-like monster went on the hunt for any morsel of food and caught a whiff of the tarts Riddle had prepared. However, mere tidbits of sweets were not enough to satiate this monster’s blackhole of an appetite. 

“Let’s go to the shop, I want fancy tuna tonight!” Grim whined to you, lightly clawing at your shirt. 

Riddle wanted to scold the furry student for being shameless in his demands but you reassured the redheaded senior that this is a common occurrence, considering you were in charge of handling the allowance you receive from Crowley so Grim tends to ask you to buy things for him. 

“We can go see if Sam has any in stock” you smiled at your gluttonous dormmate then looking to Riddle “I’m sorry, Riddle. I had fun today but we should get going before Sam’s shop closes” 

Riddle, stunned in the sudden shift in his plans, could only offer a nod as you let Grim yank you away to walk faster towards the merchant’s store. He wanted to walk you home and perhaps invite you to another engagement with him. But in the end, he was left in your dust with his other Heartslabyul dormmates and very awkward silence. 

Though three students quickly turned to one as Ace and Deuce silently snuck away from the scene. After being in the Queen of Hearts-inspired house for a while, they can when to book it lest they want to be collared by their hot-tempered Housewarden. 

“I was caught off-guard by that surprise…I will take this as a learning experience for the future”    

  — ★ LIKE CATS AND DOGS

☆ — “OH, VICE-CAPTAIN HOSHINA, YOU PLAY KAIJU IMPACT TOO?”

FEATURING: Narumi Gen x f!reader x Hoshina Soshiro

SYNOPSIS: Everyone knows by now that Captain Narumi Gen has the hots for you, no matter how hard he tries to hide it. Unluckily for him, a certain Vice-Captain of the Third Division finds the whole situation very amusing.

CONTENT: [2,6k words] female reader, reader is a platoon leader in the first division, hoshina is a menace, pining narumi, manga version so hoshina has red eyes, sparring with hoshina and narumi, basically a collection of narumi and hoshina fighting over you, no beta we die like men

PART TWO: LIKE OIL AND WATER

You wish Narumi would just drop the act. 

Does he really think he’s being slick? He, the First Division’s resident lazy bum, who for some reason always asks you to spar with him out of all the platoon leaders? Maybe if he doesn’t act so weird about it, you’d be none the wiser — but who is he fooling when he continues to compliment your abilities and patch up your injuries, all the while flaming someone else for being a weakling?

Yeah, everyone caught on pretty fast that there’s something going on between you two.

This morning, he once again orbits around you with the excuse of “I’m also going this way!”, only to instantly be caught in his own lie when Vice-Captain Hasegawa drags him off to the opposite direction, scolding him for playing around instead of getting to the meeting room. 

Good God. All you wanted in life is a cool, steady job in the Defense Force. How the hell did you manage to catch the eye of your dashingly handsome superior?

Director General Shinomiya drones on in the background as you squirm uncomfortably in your seat. Narumi is sitting diagonally from you, his gaze burning into you as he mindlessly taps the desk with his long fingers. Out of the corner of your eye you see Hasegawa elbowing his arm for the third time that day. His head drops and he turns to glare at the man irritably before straightening his position — but before long, his eyes drift over to you once more.

In front of you, Vice-Captain Hoshina is smiling. 

Shit. Your gaze drops to your lap as you feel your cheeks warming up. In the middle of trying to steal glances at your Captain, you accidentally made the mistake of looking at the Third Division’s Vice-Captain while he’s looking at you.

Wait. He’s looking at you…? Surely not. His eyes are always narrowed into slits, it makes it hard to tell where he’s actually looking. You raise your head in uncertainty, only to see that Hoshina is now resting his chin on top of his intertwined fingers, his grin wide and his eyes still very much staring at you.  

Your heart jumps and you immediately avert your gaze elsewhere — as luck would have it, back to Captain Narumi, who seems to notice that you’re distracted.

He turns his head to follow your earlier line of sight, leaning forward in his seat to see who you were staring at. Shockingly, Vice-Captain Hoshina does the same. You watch in horror as the two men turn their heads in perfect sync and lock eyes, two sharp red orbs clashing into each other.

Narumi doesn’t even bother to hide the fact that he is fuming while Hoshina’s grin only spreads wider.

Fuck.

Narumi is grumbling when he walks out of the conference room. He hates big meetings. He doesn’t need Shinomiya to talk his ear off to know that there has been a kaiju uprising in the recent months. He’s the one who’s fighting in the frontlines, god damn it.

“What are you doing?” As he leans against the wall, Hasegawa spots him and eyes at him incredulously.

Narumi shrugs, trying to act indifferent. “Nothing.”

Hasegawa shakes his head and leaves.

After having a few people salute him, Narumi finally spots you emerging from the room. He smiles and pushes himself off the wall. He’s about to make his way to you when he sees you turn your head abruptly. He pauses, watching as your figure retreat, obstructed slightly by the opened door. When you re-emerge, you’re no longer alone.

Hoshina Soshiro is folding his hands behind his back as he saunters out, walking next to you a little bit too close for comfort while smiling that creepy smile of his.

It’s cliche, but at that moment, Narumi Gen sees red. Watching you and Hoshina disappear into the corner, he stuffs his hands into his pockets and follows suit.

Vice-Captain Hoshina is a very skilled combatant. You’ve heard the rumors, but still...

It’s amazing how you manage to narrowly dodge a slash before pivoting out the way from a kick he directs at your sides. You take a swing at him with your blade, but he’s much more skillful with weapons than you are — he deflects it with his own twin swords before bringing the hilt to your knuckles, hitting it in the hopes of disarming you.

You grit your teeth and clench your blade, jerking it his way so hard that it knocks both his left sword and your own weapon. Both fall to the ground, clattering away out of your reach. 

Hoshina smiles, throwing away his other sword and gesturing for you to come to him. You accept the invitation. Closing the distance, you bring your knee up to kick him in the stomach. It feels like you hit a brick wall as you connect with his body — but still, a hit is a hit, and landing a hit on the Hoshina Soshiro is an impressive feat.

You learn your lesson not to get distracted in a fight when he suddenly grabs your knee with his hands and pulls on it so hard that you lose your footing. The whole world spins before your eyes — (you have a sudden sinking feeling that he took that hit on purpose) — as you crash to the ground. Grimacing, you let out a shaky breath. God damn, that hurt.

Hoshina’s face appears shortly after. “Ya’ alright? Quite a tumble you took there.”

You relax against the floor, trying to catch your breath. “Uh-huh. That was…” Letting Hoshina pull you up, you almost fall forward at the sheer exhaustion but manage to stop yourself from colliding into his chest. “... that was very enlightening. Thank you, Vice-Captain Hoshina.”

“You’re welcome, Platoon Leader. It’s refreshing to fight with you.”

Receiving a praise from the Defense Force's strongest close-quarters combatant makes you blush. You force your gaze downwards, trying to avoid Hoshina’s eyes. Suddenly you realize that he is still holding your hand, causing you yelp in surprise and immediately jerk your hand away.

Hoshina merely laughs, running his now-free hand through his hair. “Say, Platoon Leader, ya’ wanna grab a bite after this?”

Before you can answer, a tornado sweeps his way into the room.

“Hoshinaaaa!!” You snap your head to the door, surprised to see Captain Narumi marching towards you, his expression twisted in anger, “Who the hell gave you permission to spar with my platoon leader?!”

“My, if it isn’t Captain Narumi.” Hoshina is unbothered even as Narumi glares at him like he’s a pesky bug, “I don’t see how I need your permission to spar against someone. It’s not against the rules or anythin’~”

Hoshina’s breezy tone only makes Narumi seethe more. “You— you— I— !” He struggles to make a comeback, finally settling his gaze on you. “You! You’re coming with me!”

With that, he’s dragging you away, leaving behind a thoroughly amused Hoshina who’s waving at you goodbye with a grin on his face.

Eating is supposed to be a relaxing activity.

Instead, you’re squished between Captain Narumi of the First Division and Vice-Captain Hoshina of the Third Division, with everyone from different divisions gawking at your star-studded table.

There’s a blazing inferno on your left (Narumi stabbing his potatoes with his fork, fuming) and an icy chill on your right (Hoshina gulping down the remains of his green tea, unbothered by the whole thing).

Truth be told, your captain is intimidating as hell when he’s in a bad mood, so you decide to turn your attention to the lesser evil. Hoshina seems to be finished with his food as he opens his phone to play a game.

“Oh, Vice-Captain Hoshina, you play Kaiju Impact too?”

Narumi snaps his neck so instantaneously, he almost got whiplash from it.

“Ye~p! It’s fun, I just got the newest five star character.”

“Huuhh?! No way! You’re so lucky! I lost my 50/50...”

“We should play together sometime. Let me add you.”

“S-sure! I’m still new at this, though...”

Without warning, Narumi leans sideways to join the conversation, causing you to lean back in alarm.

“What level are you?” He questions, narrowing his eyes to look at Hoshina’s phone before chortling obnoxiously. “Ha! Still at Level 30?! I’m already at Level 60!” He turns his head to look at you, “You sure you want to play with this noob?! Play with me instead!”

Hoshina sighs exaggeratedly. “Your enemies are too hard for her, dumbass. She’s just gonna get 1-hit-KO’ed. Platoon Leader, you’re better off playing with me.”

Narumi sputters. “Huh?! I can carry you, you don’t need to do anything!”

“Then why play at all? You’re probably just looking for an opportunity to brag, right?”

“What?! Y-You’d rather play with me, right?! Right?!”

You massage your temples in exhaustion. Forget it. You’d rather just exterminate kaiju in real life instead.

You liked having a new sparring partner. Hoshina doesn’t go easy on you, but he’s always careful with his movements. It makes you feel both acknowledged and taken care of.

Narumi, on the other hand...

You yelp as the full force of Narumi’s power pushes you to the ground, knocking both your weapon and your breath away. Panting to catch your breath, you can’t even bring yourself to move because everything hurts.

“Are you alright?!” Narumi is kneeling down as he studies you frantically. “You usually defeat kaiju like a pro, what’s wrong with you today?”

“Between a kaiju and you, Captain Narumi...” You cough before panting again, “You’re definitely the bigger threat.”

To your surprise, Narumi laughs. He’s delighted at your indirect praise — sure, he knows that he’s the strongest in the Defense Force, but hearing his crush say it to his face is something else.

He gently pulls you up, steadying you by holding your waist. When you look up to thank him, he has a calm face on, but his heart is actually beating 120 bpm per minute. “Careful.” He rasps out, bangs falling down to cover his eyes.

Your heart skip a beat. Narumi’s hands still rests on your waist as he gazes right at you. It’s like there is a magnetic pull between the two of you because the distance between your faces grow closer.

You have to admit that you find him attractive — who doesn’t? — and the special treatment he gives you is very endearing. Now that you really look at him, he’s very handsome. If you move forward just a little bit more, your lips will surely touch—

“Ya—hoo! Whoops, am I interruptin’ something?”

Narumi groans in frustration as Hoshina casually walks over while you jump, taken aback by his sudden appearance. You instantly break free from Narumi’s grasp, much to his dismay. “V-Vice Captain Hoshina!”

A phone comes sliding into your vision. “Gimme your ID, won’t you?”

Flustered, you reach out to take his phone and proceed to type your Kaiju Impact player ID.

Narumi glares at his rival. “Must you really stomp all over my territory, Hoshina?” His tone is hostile as he points a finger at the violet-haired man.

Hoshina only responds with a chuckle before ignoring him completely, opting to taking his phone from your hand. “There we go. Now let’s go and play, I wanna kill time before dinner~”

You can only nod as he takes you by the arm. The two of you don’t get far because you suddenly feel a hand on your other arm.

“Captain Narumi?!”

Hoshina turns back, grinning from ear to ear when he sees Narumi clutching your arm like his life depended on it. “What’s this?”

“We’re not done with training!” Narumi reasons, loosening his grip on you but not quite letting go.

“R-Respectfully, I don’t think I can go another round...” You pipe up in a small voice.

Hoshina clicks his tongue in disapproval. “You’re such a mean boss, y’know?”

“Anyway, I’m not letting you go with him!”

“Who are you, her big bro or something?”

“Know your place, you’re not even in the same division!”

“What does that have to do with anything? I enjoy her company, that’s all~”

“Well I enjoy her company more!”

“Why are you so intent on one-upping me...? Are you a child?”

Neither of your superior relents, holding your arm like a tug of war. In the middle of them, you can already feel your soul slipping away.

“I’m sorry, Captain Narumi, but I did make a promise...”

Narumi looks at you like he’s been kicked. Meanwhile, Hoshina rejoices, pumping his fist victoriously.

“I’ll wait for you at the library!”

When Hoshina disappears, you glance anxiously at Narumi. There’s an indiscernible expression on his face as he hangs his head, sulking. ‘Is it okay to leave him like this...?’

You don’t know what possessed you to do it, but you lean forward and peck him on the lips. It’s a quick kiss that makes you feel like you’re a lovesick schoolgirl. When you pull away, Narumi has his eyes wide open as he stares at you in shock.

Getting the urge to kiss him again, you decide to run before you actually do it. Luckily, he doesn’t run after you — or else he’ll see what a blushing mess you’ve become.

After morning practice, it is finally time for Hoshina to return to his own base at Nishi-Tokyo. Upon his request, you’ve come to see him off.

It’s surprising, but you’ve grown closer to the man in the span of just one day and a half, even playing games together as you chat about life and trivial things. You’re going to miss his presence.

The same can not be said for Narumi.

“Hurry up and leave already, dammit.”

“If you’re busy you can leave. It’s not like I asked you to come see me off.”

“Then why did you get my platoon leader to accompany you, huh?!”

“What’s it to you? Why’re you so intent on hogging her all to yourself? Got a crush on her or somethin’?”

“Y-You’re one to talk, you little—!”

Not this again.

Once more, Hoshina flat-out ignores Narumi. “Well, take care~ Let’s go somewhere on your day off.”

There’s a tight smile on your face as Hoshina pats your head, making Narumi seethe in anger next to you. “That would be my pleasure, but... Vice-Captain Hoshina, it’s not good to tease me so much...”

For the first time, Hoshina’s playful smile disappears. “Who says I’m just teasing you?” The mischievous glint on his eyes are absent as he peers at you, “Next time, I’ll show you just how serious I am.”

You’re pretty sure you have the dumbest expression on your face as you freeze on your spot, blushing to the tips of your ears even as Hoshina’s figure disappears into the distance. For a while, you and Narumi stand in front of the gates, engulfed in silence.

Narumi’s annoyed sigh interrupts your train of thoughts as you’re snapped back to reality. Turning your head, you see him giving you a look you’ve never seen before.

“Platoon Leader, come see me after the day ends. I need to talk to you.”

“W-What about?”

Narrowing his eyes at your feigned ignorance, Narumi bites back the urge to hoist you over his shoulders and lock you in a room away from prying eyes. “I think you know what about,” He whispers above your ear, his voice husky, “Did you really think I’ll let you steal a kiss from me and not take responsibility for it?”

Narumi leans back, grinning in satisfaction when he sees you turning red and stuttering his name. Now that a formidable challenger has appeared, he’ll need to up his game.

Let’s see who will be the one to seize victory.

END NOTES: I give in. The Kn8 brainrot is chronic. Also, Narumi and Hoshina’s rivalry will never not be funny! Writing this is so much fun, should I make this a series?

now I'm actually invested in this idea. maybe I'll write a full length fic someday idk... for now I have short hcs

parts 1 | 2 | 3 | kalim | bad ending

summary: crowley decides to "give away" yuu to the highest "donation" for financial reasons type of post: headcanons characters: all nrc students additional info: can be read as platonic or romantic, except malleus is pretty romantic, second person pov, yuu is gender neutral, maybe a little ooc I wrote this as soon as I got up

crowley has had his fair share of "what the fuck" moments from you but this was really taking the cake

he acts so... casual about it?

swaggers into ramshackle one morning and says times are tough and your personal expenses are straining the budget so he's decided to "put you in someone else's care"

"The screening process will be vigorous to make sure you end up in good hands!" like you're a cat or something "Your expenses will be covered and you'll have somewhere to go during break!"

okay great. pretty obvious you have no say in this, so you don't even argue. what's the worst that could happen?

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Ace, Deuce, Jack, and Epel find you the next day to say they're pooling their money to buy you

"To what?"

Epel shrugs. "Oh, well Crowley said we need to offer a donation to prove we're capable of supporting you..."

(you think that if not for the laws of this land you would have slaughtered that old fart)

Jack goes on a really long tirade about how shady and underhanded this is, making sure to reaffirm that he believes you should be free to make your own choices

"So you'll let me go once you get me?"

"Uhhh..."

Ace thinks once they buy you you'll have no choice but to do all of his homework for him

Deuce says that's not really how it works- and even if he tried, Riddle would kill him

(they've already gone over this twice before finding you)

Epel happily volunteers to take you home with him over breaks, probably the only positive in this mess

even if he thinks the whole thing is kind of funny

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

incapable of keeping his mouth shut, Ace accidentally spills the plan to Riddle, who is understandably aghast

you can't just give away a person under your care like a toy!

of all the irresponsible things...

of course, he'll have to put up his offer, too

purely for your sake! with a nicer room and a brand new copy of the dorm rules, maybe you'll stop getting yourself into trouble

he's got some family money (doctors, naturally) and considers this a worthwhile purchase, for his sanity and yours

of course, Trey and Cater overhear and may or may not be pooling their own cash for a chance, too

going behind Riddle's back on this is a risky venture, but hey, someone's gotta be on your side, here, right?

I mean, between a bunch of sixteen year old boys, the housewarden, and them, who would you choose?

actually don't answer that

...not that it's much of a secret, anyway. Cater's already got their gofundme equivalent link in bio

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Leona initially plans to have you become a live-in lackey like Ruggie

but then he really starts thinking- and, hey, the possibilities are endless, right?

for one, you'd make a really good pillow

he might have to kick Grim out for your full attention, but you could learn to live with that

and malleus would hate it

...that's reason enough for him

plus, he's got money to burn, so why not?

either way, he sets his bid at a reasonable (maybe too confident) price and sits back to watch the chaos unfold as everyone scrambles for a piece of the pie

news travels fast around school, after all

then Ruggie finds out that you could dethrone him as Leona's #2 and is understandably a little annoyed

that's his cushy post-grad job gig, thank you! he's worked hard for that!

besides, why should Leona get to hoard you? the guy can barely take care of himself!

so, Ruggie ends up outsourcing to a few dozen classmates for the necessary funds at a steep I-owe-you price

he's gonna be eating nothing but dandelions for a while...

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

now, Azul is annoyed

once the news goes school-wide, it's all anyone can talk about

talk about good marketing...

why didn't he think of such a brilliant scam? he could have negotiated with Crowley to have a café brand deal tie-in!

of course, he's already set his bid, with Jade and Floyd offering to pitch in as necessary

it's a risky investment, sure, but a worthwhile one

Azul tells everyone that with the prefect's "obvious" popularity, having them at the café a few nights a week would drive sales through the roof

though that's really just what he says to shirk suspicion

a likely excuse coming from him, though, really, it would just be nice having you around

and if not for his own affections, Floyd's incessant begging and Jade's subtly manipulative comments about "how nice" it would be having a new face around would be enough for him to cave eventually

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

"Kalim, no," is the first thing that Jamil says

"I strongly advise against this. It's another one of Crowley's silly scams and you could end up a target bec- are you even listening?"

hint: he is not

the second Kalim found out that he could get to take in his favorite magicless student like one of his treasures, he was all over it

(AKA infinite sleepovers)

and for what? a little optional donation to prove he's got the funds? he's got cash to spare!

he's already got your new room in Scarabia set up before he even puts his bid in

right next to his of course :)

and despite what Jamil insists, he himself might be working behind the curtain just a little to ensure he's the one who ends up with you

after all, why should Kalim get everything? this might be a valuable learning opportunity for him

You don't always get what you want

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

as much as Epel tries to keep the rest of his dorm from finding out, it's inevitable

he's actually a little surprised that the news didn't get to Vil sooner

with Rook around campus, surely he must have said something...

when Vil does find out, though, he just sighs

oh, of course. what next, will everyone meet each other in the arena and fight to the death over the prefect?

of all the silly, immature things...

oh? what's that? he's bidding anyway? of course he is, silly potato. he can't have some unwashed miscreant making you sleep on polyester bedding

(really, he's the only person on campus worthy of your time)

Rook has also been mysteriously absent from the dorm lately, though his initials on a poem and a strangely large sum of money end up in the donation pile

but really, that could be anyone... Rook would never dare betray Vil again, right?

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Ortho finds out directly from the other first years and sends Idia the details immediately

with a little note of encouragement, of course: "could be excellent for improving your social skills!"

Idia understandably freaks out

"WTF!!!! nooo way! this is a person, not a chatbot we're talking about here! I can barely keep virtual pets alive!!!!"

(liar)

(...but this is still different)

the conversation ends there, but semi-anonymous bid from someone named "gloomurai" gets cashapp'd directly to crowley

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

everyone in the room immediately turns to Malleus

"For the record, I think it's wrong to be bargaining over a human being," Silver says first. "But if anyone could handle it with grace, it's you."

Lilia laughs. "Oh, you're just saying that because you like the prefect so much!"

"Father, you're the one who likes the prefect so much,"

"Oh, right! carry on then. After all, I'm sure we could share,"

Sebek is the only one relatively against the idea, though Lilia luckily manages to get him to lower his voice after his third speech about how you aren't good enough for his liege

Malleus is rather quiet through the whole evening, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with any of the points made

he disappears for a short while, and when he comes back he seems a little more confident

though, of course, he goes to you first

seeing him at Ramshackle in the middle of the night is a familiar and welcoming sight after all of the chaos of your week

and he's in a great mood!

"Child of man! I've come with news," he says. "I have heard of your predicament and have come up with a solution!"

you immediately sulk. "Oh, no. You know I think this whole thing is terrible, right?"

"Yes, Silver mentioned you might not like the idea of being bought and sold like a trinket. But worry not, I do not plan on paying for you in money,"

you pause, at a loss for words, and then tentatively continue. "You're not...?"

"Of course not. What a primitive idea, I was baffled to hear it myself. My proposal will be more traditional: a modest sum of treasure, and a generous amount of livestock and the finest crop Briar Valley can offer,"

certainly he's not this naive, you think

"You really think Crowley is going to accept that over money? I'm pretty sure Kalim just bid away an entire country's worth,"

he laughs. "You speak as if this is some kind of business deal! I'm quite confident that my dowry will be best,"

huh. that was a strange way of putting it

but then again, you still didn't really understand how things work here, so you go along with it

and you allow yourself to relax. he seems confident in his offer, and he doesn't even see you as some kind of prize to win!

"Oh, well, alright. Thanks! I'm glad you're on it,"

he smiles. "Rest assured, child of man, you're in good hands. My dowry will far outshine the others, and the wedding will be even better,"

"I was honestly getting a little nervous for a momen- wait- wedding!?"

the notes are broken 😂