For Real. It Is Very Much Monogender Centric, With 'nonbinary' Tacked Onto It. Except... There Are Men,

for real. it is very much monogender centric, with 'nonbinary' tacked onto it. except... there are men, nonbinary or not, who are also not men, so clearly that acceptance of 'nonbinary' is conditional. 'non-man' is very rigid in its definitions and excludes these folks for being men at all. 'non-man' has become a slap in the face to me for this reason, a reminder that I will forever be ridiculed as too much of a man to be the 'right' kind of lesbian. it's insulting. it's become a badge to segregate lesbians like myself who don't wear it from the 'real' lesbians, the ones who aren't so polluted by manhood. which... sucks.

lesbian community sometimes is too exclusive bruh 😭😭 i swear what is the standards of being accepted? Ill see a post or a blog that says "lesbian safe space" but next to it i see "bi lesbians dni" like were u rEally that safe of a space???

and im not even bi lesbian myself, this problem doesnt directly affect me until it does like what if they start going "ace lesbians dni" next??? its like gold star lesbianism but evolved into "you cant sit w us unless ur 100% lesbian 🙄" and thats so fucked bc ppl are way too diverse for that shit, there will always be more exceptional lesbians out there and ppl whos sexuality differs from the majority bc every brain is different and also lesbianism is a spectrum as well.

Why is it so accepted in lesbian communities that the second ones sexuality is different or a lil more exceptional ppl start putting them in different categories/boxes and claiming they arent a ""ReAL"" lesbian unless they r ""100% lesbian"" like shut uuuuppp pls youre not only excluding bi lesbians but also a bunch of other lesbians like me whos lesbianism is a little more different than the norm (for me bc of my asexuality) like thats not a safe space at all why is it sooo hard to just not police others sexuality like why is so hard literally get over urselves acting like uptight bullies .😭

"But what if a cis man starts identifying as a lesbian ??? 🥺🥺"

Then good for him for finding out a label for his complex attraction. Idk what you thought I was gonna say in response to that.

Lesboys are boys who are lesbians. Straight up that's just the definition. That includes cis men.

I read your responsr to an afab person identifying as transfemme, and im wondering if the concept of "othering" trans-women has occurred to you.

If youre afab, and identify as femme, thats cisgender. To identify as transfemme is saying that trans women are not women. Trans women, by definition, are amab. So i am curious how one can feel this way while thinking it does absolutely no harm to your trans sisters

hello- your definition of "othering" is completely incorrect.

you are ignoring the existence of intersex transfemmes who were assigned afab at one point

you are ignoring the existence of intersex transfemmes of any agab, including amab and none

you are ignoring the existence of transfemmes of color who are misgendered due to features due to racism. women of color are constantly misgendered by white people because our features do not match those of white women

you are ignoring the existence afab people who were forcibly raised male

you are ignoring the broader spectrum of what transfemininity can encompass, therefore, you are the one othering transfemmes. you are the one who literally does not care about your trans sisters

trans man does not mean afab. trans woman does not mean amab. where did you get that information from, because it literally completely excludes the existence of intersex people. you're not a transfeminist by aggressively ignoring intersex people when a lot of the afab transfemme people who come here to talk about their actual real world lived experiences are in fact intersex. you are aggressively ignoring the truth

you're disrespecting me as well, which you don't seem to care about. i'm an intersex transfemme person. i'm someone who was born amab, forcibly changed to afab, forced on estrogen hrt, and then needed to transition my body back to masculine because of severe dysphoria, and also health issues due to low testosterone levels. i was constantly told my entire childhood that i could not be a girl or woman because of how masculine my face and body was. i developed a beard during puberty. misgendering was rampant during this time. then i came out as genderqueer and suddenly i wasn't allowed to be a man, either.

have you talked to a wide variety of transfemmes or do you stick to a specific archetype and bubble? you value strawmen and conjecture over people who have actually lived that life. you need to leave your echo chamber (and house) and talk to more transfemme, non binary, intersex people and people of color in general. take a second to listen to people when they speak. you're not the protagonist of life. your logic is shit. grow up

terfs are so normal that they'll pretend to be a trans man on a sockpuppet account to verbally berate me because I drew my fursona pregnant womp womppppp

listen to intersex people. I'm so tired of the perisex community talking over us, and notice I said us. I'm not going to have my intersex identity erased because of what perisex people say anymore, I refuse to go away because it scares them that a common condition falls under the intersex umbrella. Their intersexism doesn't change the fact that intersex people exist, no matter how many ways they try to erase us.

Not to be an annoying activist or anything, but I honestly really don't appreciate Kat Blaque, a PERISEX person, talking over intersex people because of what the infamously intersexist medical field has to say about PCOS. 'Doctors say that PCOS isn't an intersex condition' yeah and doctors have said that homosexuality is an illness. The medical field ain't perfect and can fuck up and grow.

I did NOT get put on hormones at 13 to 'fix' myself just for some perisex person to come along and say I'm not intersex because I don't have a medically recognized variation, despite the fact that things like CAH get misdiagnosed as PCOS and vice versa all the fucking time. Maybe we should take what the medical field says with a grain of salt and listen to actual members of communities. :/

it shows how little terfs and other transphobes care about intersex people when we cannot even refer to ourselves as intersex without a) them insisting on saying we are people with dsds and saying or implying that being intersex doesn’t actually exist or b) needing to know our entire medical history to decide if we are intersex enough in their dyadic opinion