Act Like One Of Them They Wont Notice You

act like one of them… they won’t notice you…

So my family was going on a long car trip, just over a year ago. The trip was long enough that we had to bring entertainment, so I was watching Twilight.

digression: I feel like people really overrate how bad it is. Like yeah, it’s not especially good, but it’s not that bad either. digression ends.

I was watching Bella’s first day at school, excited to see Edward - I had read the book, and she loves him so she hyped him up a lot. My certainty that Edward would be beautiful was only strengthened by the fact that Bella was gorgeous.

So I was immensely let down when Bella saw Edward from across the cafeteria and. well. He was okay, I guessed, but I didn’t see what all the fuss was about.

Piece by piece, my mind came to the realization that, hey - if they were both supposed to be super beautiful by conventional standards, but I wasn’t feeling Edward’s attraction at all - and if my two video game crushes had both been effeminate/not super gendered at all - maybe I just wasn’t attracted to men.

hey tumblr, wanna hear how i discovered i wasn’t straight?

PSA FOR THE COMMUNITY

Apostrophes are used to form possessives of nouns, to indicate the omission of letters, and occasionally to form plurals of lowercase letters. Does this make sense to you? Let’s go into more detail:

POSSESSIVES:

“the man’s hat” is the hat of the man.

“James’ hat” is the hat of James. Note that “James” ends in “s”, so the additional s can be excluded or included.

For joint posession, such as “Kylie and Jacob’s game”, only the final noun has an apostrophe.

OMISSIONS:

Commonly known as contractions, this category is one of the most frequently misused. Let’s (let us) look at some examples.

“don’t” do not

“who’s” who is (although, depending on context, you may want to use “whose” instead)

“could’ve” could have - this is frequently misheard “could of”, which is gramatically incorrect

Decades of the 1900s are also commonly shortened “the ‘60s”, “the ‘80s”, and so on.

And most importantly,

“it’s” means “it is”, AND IS NOT THE SAME AS “ITS”. “Its” is a possessive pronoun meaning “belonging to it”, as in “The Council has made its decision.”

Possessive pronouns such as “theirs” and “its” do not need apostrophes to show that they are possessive. If you’re using indefinite pronouns such as “anyone” or “nobody”, then apostrophes ARE used to indicate possession, as in “It’s everybody’s dream.”

Let’s try some examples:

“___ a wonderful life” - it’s

“(examining a computer) ___ hard drive is dead.” - its

“___ no biggie.” - it’s

“This meeting will attempt to address some prior concerns of ___ members.” - its

Does this make sense? I know, English sucks.

One other thing:

APOSTROPHES SHOULD NEVER BE USED FOR PLURALIZATION OF ANYTHING THAT ISN’T A SINGLE LETTER.

If you want to refer to, say, how many instances of the letter “s” occur in a text, you might want to say something like “There are 67 s’s in the text.” This indicates the single letter’s separation from the plural. Compare it to its counterpart, without the apostrophe - “67 ss in the text” is harder to read.

Apostrophes should not be used in pluralization of anything else. If you say “I spent hours’ waiting in the rain”, then you are not only a wet fool, but gramatically incorrect. “Hours” is already a full, pluralized word - you don’t need to add anything.

Please, please share this information. Check your work. DON’T count on your teachers to find and correct these mistakes - even English teachers get this wrong. Please do your part to make the world a better place.

Sincerely, a grammar nerd who gets a migrane every time she sees “it’s” in place of “its”

forget all those “hot takes” on “omg what would happen if [predictable scenario] happened??”, what would happen if 682 saw that one image that everyone who’s ever seen it has been a loyal foundation member?

weee

liking someone platonically is so embarrassing like. yeah i admire you. yeah i think about you all the time. yeah i look forward to every time i see you even if it's only for a minute. yeah it's all platonic and yeah i couldn't explain this because it'd sound romantic. fucking hell