sun-kissy - if i was empty space
if i was empty space

and you were a formless shape, we'd fit

218 posts

Hi, I Wanted To Request A James Potter X Reader Thingy :))

Hi, i wanted to request a james potter x reader thingy :))

So the idea is that james and reader broke up during hogwarts/directly after because they had the children talk, james really wants to be a father but reader is terrified of pregnancy so they break up. But over the years the reader keeps yearning for james and eventually they meet again when james and lily are together and have baby harry and its just really angsty 😭😭

Hope all of this makes sense i thought of this while listening to a song lyric

thank you for the request babe i love how your brain works <3 this is quite angsty so hopefully you like it! and now i’m curious to know what song 👀

also here’s some shameless promotion for @astonishment’s series with the same name, it’s deliciously tragic (☹️☹️☹️) and everyone should check it out!!

in another life | j.p.

Hi, I Wanted To Request A James Potter X Reader Thingy :))
Hi, I Wanted To Request A James Potter X Reader Thingy :))
Hi, I Wanted To Request A James Potter X Reader Thingy :))

“Calm down, babe,” Sirius mutters as you walk in step, looping his arm through yours.

You nibble on your bottom lip anxiously, sighing as you glance over at him. “It’s not that easy, Siri. I’m seeing him after what — four years? I can’t just calm down!”

He rolls his eyes, reaching towards you and thumbing at your lip to save it from your torment. “You’re seeing me after four years.”

You turn to Sirius, and he huffs out a laugh at your deadpan expression. “Well, you never asked me to marry you.”

Sirius wiggles his eyebrows, his lips curving up into a grin. “Marry me?”

“Fuck off, Black.”

James and Lily Potter were holding a meet-up of sorts, and had invited most people in your year at Hogwarts. You were hesitant to go, given your history with James, but Sirius insisted you tag along. You knew he, Remus, and Peter had stayed in touch with James. Rightfully, you ought to have too. But neither of you tried to; maybe you both knew it was better that way.

Sirius simpers, coming to a halt in front of the large black gates of the mansion. He reaches forward and begins to twist the lock, and you instinctively reach over and grab his hand to stop him. He turns to you, confusion twisting his features. “What are you — oh. Oh, sweetheart.”

He softens when he sees the expression on your face. You’re biting your cuticles, and the anxiety in your features is palpable. Sirius sighs and firmly pulls your hand away from your mouth, intertwining your fingers together. “It’s gonna be okay. Just be cordial with him. There’s no bad blood, right?”

“Right,” you mutter, albeit uncertainly.

“But, um…” he sighs, dropping your hand to rake his fingers through his hair. “There’s something I should’ve told you before. But I didn’t wanna freak you out.”

“What?”

The apprehension in your tone causes Sirius to wince. “James and Lily, they… they’ve got a baby.”

There’s a beat of loud silence as the fact sinks in, a mount of uncertainty and hurt settling in the pit of your stomach.

“Oh.”

You’re trying not to show it, but the heartbreak on your face is painfully obvious. Sirius pouts, moving to take your hand again. “Babe, I’m sorry. I should’ve –”

He doesn’t get the chance to finish his sentence, the gates swinging open to reveal a beaming James Potter.

“Pads,” he grins immediately, eyes locking on Sirius as he moves towards him and swoops him into a quick hug.

You take the moment to look James over. He looked exactly like you remembered — messy curls, toned biceps, that movie-star grin. Yet something felt different, in the way he pulled Sirius into a hug without all the raucous fervour he would’ve at 16, how he held him so gently at arm’s length while talking to him. He’d softened, you realised, from the responsibilities of fatherhood and being a husband.

They pull apart a moment later, and his gaze drifts to you. His smile loses a bit of its sunshine, not softening but not quite dimming either. “Y/n, hey.”

There’s a moment of hesitation as he looks at you, but then he seems to decide upon giving you a hug too.

“Hi,” you mutter as he shortens the distance between you, needling his arms under yours to press them to your back. You embrace him in return, and a sudden pang of hurt shoots through your heart at the familiarity of the action.

Perhaps he was remembering it too, from the way he tightened his grip. Both of you were heavy on physical touch, and it was undeniably the best part of your relationship back in Hogwarts — how he’d always have a hand wrapped around your waist, how you’d wake up to cuddles and hugs every morning. You didn’t exactly have anyone to hug anymore, living alone.

So you convince yourself that the reason you hold on to James for slightly longer than necessary was because you craved human touch, not because of… anything else.

Finally, James pulls away, his arms dropping to his sides as he gives you a small smile. You plaster one onto your face too, for his sake. “So,” he starts as he turns around, beginning to lead you and Sirius into the mansion, “how’ve you been, Y/n?”

You can feel Sirius’ gaze burning holes into the side of your head, but choose to ignore him. “I’ve been great, yeah. You?”

James nods. “That’s cool. Yeah, I’ve been good too. Things have been fun, but kind of busy; you know, with work and Lily and the baby…” He seems to realise what he’s said, and clears his throat awkwardly. Oh, of course. The baby.

Sirius is beside you in an instant, arching his eyebrows and nudging your elbow to respond.

“Oh, um… congrats on the baby, by the way.”

James turns around to face you as you walk, and you give him a grin to prove that you’re being genuine — to show him that it didn’t feel like there was a knife being twisted in your gut every time the word baby was brought up.

His eyes soften, and you know he can tell how you’re feeling. But he gives you a grateful smile, and says no more as the three of you come to a stop in front of the house.

“By the way,” James mutters as he pushes the door open, “you guys are like, an hour early. You’re the only ones here.”

You immediately turn around to glower at Sirius for subjecting you to more torture than necessary by bringing you early. But he all but smirks as he follows you in.

Your eyes coast around the mansion, taking it all in. It’s decorated in a minimalist aesthetic, white couches and brown rugs. It was pretty, that was for sure; but you couldn’t help but think how different it was from James’ place in the dorm — posters and stickers all over the walls, boisterously red curtains and LED lights. It used to be so full of life.

Honestly, you might’ve guessed an old couple lived here, if not for the small signs of their life as a family — the pacifier on the dining table, a cradle at the far end of the living room, and the heart-shaped photo frames lining the walls.

James watches you, a small smile playing on the edges of his lips. “You like it?”

He knows you wouldn’t like it, it’s everything you aren’t. Your dorm had been just like his; trying to fit as many vinyls and posters onto that small space next to your bed as possible. There would be fairy lights in every corner and succulents on the nightstand, a dreamcatcher which he’d gifted you hanging right above your bed. You were messy, as a person, and with your love too. You thought he was messy as well; but apparently he’d gotten his shit together already.

“Yeah, it’s simple. Pretty.”

“Honey —“ Lily bustles out the kitchen, a small gasp escaping her lips as she sees you and Sirius. She’s holding a ladle in one hand, and has her other arm wrapped around a baby perched on her waist.

You don’t register it when she kisses your cheek and hugs you, asks you how you’re doing and leads you to sit on the couch. Your gaze is locked on the baby, every second spent staring at him worsening the nauseous feeling at the back of your throat.

You must’ve asked for his name, because the word, “Harry,” registers in your head. This beautiful baby, with Lily’s deep green eyes and James’ luscious curls, was Harry.

Would you have named your baby Harry? Probably not, it was too generic. But it was too late now, to pick out names and choose a less boring aesthetic for a house together.

You had lost your chance back in seventh year, that night when you were laying on James’ bed, limbs tangled together as he raked his hands through your hair with all the love in the world. You’re gonna be my husband one day, you’d whispered, feeling so much affection for him you thought your heart would burst. Yeah, baby, he’d replied with a soft smile. We’re gonna live in a mansion, with our dogs and children and —

Children?

I don’t… I don’t want children. And that’s where it all started going downhill, that’s the moment James’ smile turned upside down and his hand dropped from your hair. It had turned into an argument, a screaming match — and eventually a reason to break up. James couldn't understand much you feared it, the pain of pregnancy and the exhaustion that came with motherhood. And some part of you knew that you weren’t blameless either — calling him awful things and accusing him of not loving you; though love was all he ever gave till the day you told him it was over.

The feeling of Sirius’ nails digging into your palm brings you back to the present, and you see him nodding absentmindedly as Lily rambles about how much trouble Harry’s been, and oh, she’s picked up a hobby of crocheting, and…

You flit your eyes to look at James sitting opposite you, gazing at you with his brows pinched in concern. Your emotions must’ve been obvious on your face, then. But he immediately looks away when Lily calls out to him, holding up Harry for him to carry.

You watch silently as James squeezes into the chair next to his wife, taking the small, lovely baby between his large, calloused hands. He smiles at Harry, looking at him though he was the most precious thing on earth. James’ fingers bunch Harry’s tiny shirt as he brings him close to his face, gently pressing a kiss to his forehead. Lily’s head lolls onto James’ shoulder as he shifts Harry into a comfortable lying position in his arms.

There you have it. The perfect family, with the gorgeous wife and the adorable baby and the man who could’ve been yours if you wanted.

It’s too much for you to take, and Sirius squeezes your hand as you start to shake. Harry coos, and you melt at how James’ face breaks into a sunny beam. He tilts his head to press a soft peck to his wife’s hair, and there’s so much love in that simple gesture that you feel like you could die.

You feel Sirius’ worried gaze on you, your hands trembling and your knee bobbing up and down. The taste of blood from how hard you’re nibbling on your lip is grounding; it brings you back to yourself, who you are, and not who you could’ve been.

“Hey,” he murmurs softly from beside you, but it doesn’t get lodged into your brain. The only thing you feel is your vision of the perfect family blurring, soft streams of regret rolling down your cheek. Sirius makes a small noise of pity from beside you, and James looks up instantly, eyes widening as they lock on you. Lily is fast asleep, baby Harry staring at you with his thumb stuck into his mouth.

“Y/n, you okay?” James asks gently, but you don’t reply, still looking at him with that distraught look on your face. You open your mouth, but you don’t seem to have the vocabulary to express the heartache you felt right that moment. It felt strangely like grief; like you were mourning for the version of yourself you never got to meet, for the version of James who didn’t have the chance to be yours.

James' mouth twists downwards in a frown as he stands up and steps closer towards you. It’s like an alarm is set off in your head, and you immediately jolt back to the present, sucking in a deep breath.

Your legs act of their own accord as you stand up, Sirius’s hand falling limp on the couch as he looks up at you in surprise. You gulp down the lump in your throat and fiercely brush the tears away, James coming to a halt in front of you. “Y/n, baby —“

“I’m not your baby.”

James slaps a hand to his mouth, eyes as wide as Harry’s now. “Fuck, no, it — it just came out. I didn’t mean to. Shit, you’re crying.”

“I’m okay,” you warble. James opens his mouth to retort but you don’t let him, knowing that the longer you spent here, the more the gaping hole in your chest would grow. You couldn’t bear it anymore, watching James with his wife and wishing it was you instead. The worst part was that it was all your fault, your stupidity and your rejection.

“I’m fine, really. I…I’m gonna go now, it was nice meeting you. Convey my love to Remus, Peter and the girls.” You pick up your bag, moving to the front door with a befuddled James tracking your movements.

“Y/n —“

“Bye, James,” you call out halfheartedly as you slip into your shoes. He comes to stand at the door, rocking Harry from side to side. He looks almost disappointed as you make to leave.

“I’m sorry.”

You look up, surprised. “It’s not your fault.”

James’ lips pursed together with guilt, seeming like he wants to say something as he opens and closes his mouth. He finally sighs, “It’s not your fault either.

It was startling, how he still knew just the right thing to say — he always had. The regret that had been clogging up your heart for years was drained out upon hearing that one sentence. James didn’t hold the utter failure of your relationship against you, and that was enough. If you couldn’t have his love, at least you had his forgiveness.

You give him a half smile and nod, turning around to leave. You’d go back to yours, more of a house than a home. But at least no one but yourself could hurt you there, there was no one to turn away and no hearts to break. No one to love.

“Hey.”

You spin back around to face the door, heart stopping upon seeing the moistness in his eyes. You hear the scratchiness in his throat as he sucks in a deep breath.

“James…”

“No, don’t — don’t say anything. I just wanted to tell you, um…” he defeatedly runs a hand through his hair and exhales shakily. “I hope we worked out, you know, in another life.”

That catches you off guard, your heart involuntarily squeezing in your chest. James looks almost embarrassed as he says it, but you see the vulnerability in his eyes. He was right — maybe there was some planet on which you were less of a coward, another world where he could put a ring on your finger. He’d been yours to lose in this life, perhaps he was yours to love in another.

You clear your throat, feeling nausea brimming in the pits of your gut. “Yeah, I… I hope so too.”

You spare yourself one last glance at him before turning towards the exit, praying he didn’t see the tears dribbling down your cheeks.

You squeeze your eyes shut and will yourself to trudge forward, before he can call out to you and break your heart all over again.

In a few long strides, you’re out the gates; out of James’ life again.

  • aalxrose
    aalxrose liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • aalxrose
    aalxrose reblogged this ¡ 6 months ago
  • mirrorwalls1989
    mirrorwalls1989 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • louryder16
    louryder16 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • hobiebrowns-wife
    hobiebrowns-wife liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • bassisttrash
    bassisttrash liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • thetattooedandthedamned
    thetattooedandthedamned liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • hushshhsshshsjijititz
    hushshhsshshsjijititz liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • meiscoven
    meiscoven liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • benbarnesbitj
    benbarnesbitj liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • ohmysw33
    ohmysw33 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • darling-289
    darling-289 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • dustyrayine
    dustyrayine liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • marauders-eras
    marauders-eras liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • sllyrabbit
    sllyrabbit liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • marvelousmaraudersmayhem
    marvelousmaraudersmayhem liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • y00ngisbaguettefeet
    y00ngisbaguettefeet liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • angeline4potter
    angeline4potter liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • toolonely1
    toolonely1 reblogged this ¡ 6 months ago
  • toolonely1
    toolonely1 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • lgscott412
    lgscott412 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • wavgesd
    wavgesd liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • padf00ts-l0ver
    padf00ts-l0ver liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • ma-ri-3
    ma-ri-3 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • aclmagic
    aclmagic liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • horror-moviegirl
    horror-moviegirl liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • cas-planet
    cas-planet liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • aleeriav
    aleeriav liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • gl1tterc0rpse
    gl1tterc0rpse liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • dromedathecoolest
    dromedathecoolest liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • quantumquillz
    quantumquillz liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • r-is-typing
    r-is-typing liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • lcvegoob
    lcvegoob liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • theswreties
    theswreties liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • jimblejamblewritings
    jimblejamblewritings liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • luvg1s3l1e
    luvg1s3l1e liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • potterwarsss
    potterwarsss liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • ilovelyby
    ilovelyby liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • maribabysstuff
    maribabysstuff reblogged this ¡ 6 months ago
  • maribabysstuff
    maribabysstuff liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • niyu2208
    niyu2208 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • grinfucking
    grinfucking liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • adharanotfound
    adharanotfound liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • jfcuf
    jfcuf liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • glob-bottom
    glob-bottom liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • pandas0012
    pandas0012 liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • ramblingsofasimplegirll
    ramblingsofasimplegirll liked this ¡ 6 months ago
  • desi-brownie
    desi-brownie liked this ¡ 6 months ago

More Posts from Sun-kissy

7 months ago

hi angel! a drabble about yapper gf with remus if you’d please <3

hi, gorgeous, thank you so much for requesting!! i'm sorry this is short but this was all i could do and i wanted to answer as soon as i can <3333

remus lupin x fem!reader, fluff

"and then i was supposed find who mr. cole is, everyone was saying he was like the most important person in the office, so i felt really nervous. like, if he asks me something and i can't answer? can you imagine how bad it would be?"

"yes, dove." remus answers. "but why can't you answer?"

"because- these are intimidating people, remus. what if i say something stupid and ruin my chances? god, i felt so stressed, my stomach was aching."

remus hands you your cup of tea. you take a slow sip, your throat feels a bit raw but you need to tell every detail of your first day at the office to your boyfriend. you texted him when you can but of course it wasn't enough to let him know everything.

"so, you found mr. cole?" remus asks, rubbing your thigh with a big hand.

"yes. turns out he's actually nice, i asked him a few things about my work and he always answered with a smile. he told someone to show me the break room and he wished me good luck."

"that's so nice." remus says. "who was that person he asked, did you get to be friends?"

"i think so." you answer. it's not surprising to remus, you've always been easy to talk to. people love your sunshiny attitude, your ability to find common grounds to say things to them. "her name is victoria, i think it's a really nice name, so i told her that. she showed me the break room and how to work the coffee machine in case i need it. she was super nice, she told me all the basics to get used to the people in the office."

"i think you'll do perfect." remus says.

"you're being so nice to me, but i can't be so nice." you say with a small pout. "i mean, i'm always a bit worried to do something wrong, and i don't know the place so well now that i'm new. i don't wanna do something i don't mean to by accident. or you know, getting into someone's way. or being known the wrong way. it's like a nightmare, i always try to keep my cool. like, i'm trying to walk in the office with my heels and i look so confident, right? if only they knew what i was thinking in real."

at this point remus has to cup your cheeks and kiss you soundly. do you realize how sweet you're being? you immediately give in to the kiss, your hands stroking his hair to keep him close to you. you wish it could be possible to have him with you in the office, too. you could just get a kiss and your mood would be fixed.

"i wish we could do this in the office, too." he needs to know what you think, so you tell him. "i would be less nervous."

remus chuckles, his thumb drawing circles on your cheek. "we can try." he says. "but i'd hate if mr. cole finds out. what would he think of his new employee then?"

"that she's in love with a gorgeous, angel boy?"

"come here." he says. he will kiss you for hours if that's what it takes for you to stop being so sweet. his poor heart will not take it.


Tags :
7 months ago

back at the cafe and i’ve dragged a friend along this time!!

guys im sitting in a cafe having a maple syrup ice blended drink and wearing my cosy cardigan and working on an essay <333


Tags :
7 months ago

your barista remus is going to be de death of me

HAHAHA pls don’t die but thank you lovely!!


Tags :
7 months ago

hi lovely what about writing some sirius fluff with an emotionally exhausted reader? you can choose how you want it to go <3

Thank you baby, I hope this isn't too short and that it did justice.

You laid on your bed, your eyes open but your mind blank as your fingers play with the thread on the sheets. Why do I feel like this? That was the question you had, but you wanted to know what it was that you're feeling. You're not happy, you're not sad, you're not anxious or scared you're just... alive.

Somewhere in your mind it registers that the door was opened after a knock. You don't have the energy to even move to face the person that entered your room. Once he sat next to you, you recognised his signature leather scent. Sirius bent down to press a soft kiss to your hair, running his fingers through it.

"Hello dove. Everything all right," he asks. You could hear the worry oozing from his voice. It takes you a little while to formulate your reply.

When you do, you take a shaky breath and say, "I... don't know."

You could practically see Sirius's frown even though he wasn't in view. He crawled under the covers with you and wrapped his arms around your body, pulling you closer to him. You look up at him, straight into his grey eyes. He graces you with a little smile, warm enough to melt ice.

You press your face against his chest, gathering all the warmth and comfort his body can give you. Sirius hugs you to his chest, burying his face in the scent of your beautiful hair.

"I love you, my little dove," he whispers as your eyes become heavy with sleep.

"Love you more," you say, although your voice sounds like a mumble against Sirius, he knows what you're saying. He loves you the way you are, and he hopes you know that.


Tags :
7 months ago

okay | r.l.

Okay | R.l.
Okay | R.l.
Okay | R.l.

a/n: for my academically burnt out girlies (can you tell i’m one of them😭)

tw: fluff

remus lupin x reader

Remus quietly padded down into the common room, unsurprised to find you seated at the table with parchments and books scattered around you.

There was a puddle of drool spreading from where your face rested against a book, fast asleep. Remus internally winced; there was no way that was a comfortable position for your neck.

He gently brushes the tips of his fingers against your hairline and you immediately jolt awake, almost knocking his arm in the process.

You raise your hands to rub your eyes with slowed movements, the exhaustion lining your features painfully obvious. You turn to him, befuddled, before realising who it is and softening.

You looked adorable, mussed up hair and wide-eyed. It had Remus thinking about how it would feel to wake up to the sight for the rest of his life. “How long have you been up for, dove?”

He flattens his palms onto your shoulder blades, needling pressure into the tense muscles with his thumbs. You melt under his touch, your shoulders slumping. “Not very long,” you lie.

“It’s 4am, baby. You’ve been studying all night, haven’t you?”

You draw your bottom lip between your teeth, letting out a soft sigh. “Yeah… I guess. But I have to, there’s still three more chapters I’m not done revising. I just need more coffee.”

“The last thing you need right now,” Remus mutters as he lets go of your shoulders and lowers himself into a chair beside you, “is coffee. You need to get some rest, sweetheart. You’re not gonna be able to remember anything when you’re this tired.”

He uses his foot to push your chair around till you’re facing him. You reach for him immediately, sleepy movements causing you to lay your arms, bundled up, in his lap. Bemusedly, he takes your hands and starts to rub circles into your wrists.

“But I’m not tired,” you argue, though your eyelids look like they’re physically weighing you down. You’re blinking so forcefully Remus thinks it would generate enough energy to power a light bulb. “I just took a power nap and I’m good now.”

“That’s not enough, dove. It’s late, and you’re gonna be fucked up tomorrow. You need proper rest.”

“Do I?”

“You do.”

Your face is lovably scrunched up now, and Remus can’t tell if you’re trying to challenge him or if your brain really is that fuzzy.

He moves to gather your materials and you make a small noise of protest, dazedly shaking your head. “I can’t rest now, I need to finish studying first.”

You seem hardly able to track his movements, eyelids drooping shut every few seconds. “You can study tomorrow, sweetheart. You’ve studied enough for tonight.”

You huff, stubbornly staying put in your chair. Remus rises to his feet, tucking the stack of books in one arm before firmly pulling you up with the other. You stay silent, obviously annoyed but too exhausted to fight back.

He wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you into his side as he leads you up the staircase to his dorm. The anxiety in your features is palpable, and he feels bad for worsening it. But he knows you, he knows you would never feel like you’ve studied enough. You’d work yourself to the bone if you had it your way, so it was up to him to make sure you didn’t.

“You look exhausted, baby,” he murmurs as he bends down to press a kiss to your forehead. You visibly soften, your expression morphing into one less rigid. “I am exhausted.”

“I know,” he concedes, pushing you onto the bed until you’re properly laying down. “You’re gonna do better with rest, trust me. You’re gonna be okay.”

You hum weakly in response, eyes fluttering shut as soon as your head hits the pillow. Even in your dazed state, your arms extend towards him.

Remus lets out a soft chuckle and climbs into the bed next to you, pulling the covers over the both of you.

You shuffle towards him, seeking his warmth. He wraps an arm around your middle and tugs till you’re snugly pressed up against each other, pecking a kiss to the soft skin beneath your eye. “I meant what I said, alright? Don’t worry about the test. You’re gonna be okay.”

“Okay,” you whisper, and he feels that last bit of uncertainty you had melt away as you deflate. Your words come out muffled as you move impossibly closer, snuggling your face into his chest. “Okay. G’night.”

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”


Tags :