Hi, I Wanted To Request A James Potter X Reader Thingy :))
Hi, i wanted to request a james potter x reader thingy :))
So the idea is that james and reader broke up during hogwarts/directly after because they had the children talk, james really wants to be a father but reader is terrified of pregnancy so they break up. But over the years the reader keeps yearning for james and eventually they meet again when james and lily are together and have baby harry and its just really angsty đđ
Hope all of this makes sense i thought of this while listening to a song lyric
thank you for the request babe i love how your brain works <3 this is quite angsty so hopefully you like it! and now iâm curious to know what song đ
also hereâs some shameless promotion for @astonishmentâs series with the same name, itâs deliciously tragic (âšď¸âšď¸âšď¸) and everyone should check it out!!
in another life | j.p.



âCalm down, babe,â Sirius mutters as you walk in step, looping his arm through yours.
You nibble on your bottom lip anxiously, sighing as you glance over at him. âItâs not that easy, Siri. Iâm seeing him after what â four years? I canât just calm down!â
He rolls his eyes, reaching towards you and thumbing at your lip to save it from your torment. âYouâre seeing me after four years.â
You turn to Sirius, and he huffs out a laugh at your deadpan expression. âWell, you never asked me to marry you.â
Sirius wiggles his eyebrows, his lips curving up into a grin. âMarry me?â
âFuck off, Black.â
James and Lily Potter were holding a meet-up of sorts, and had invited most people in your year at Hogwarts. You were hesitant to go, given your history with James, but Sirius insisted you tag along. You knew he, Remus, and Peter had stayed in touch with James. Rightfully, you ought to have too. But neither of you tried to; maybe you both knew it was better that way.
Sirius simpers, coming to a halt in front of the large black gates of the mansion. He reaches forward and begins to twist the lock, and you instinctively reach over and grab his hand to stop him. He turns to you, confusion twisting his features. âWhat are you â oh. Oh, sweetheart.â
He softens when he sees the expression on your face. Youâre biting your cuticles, and the anxiety in your features is palpable. Sirius sighs and firmly pulls your hand away from your mouth, intertwining your fingers together. âItâs gonna be okay. Just be cordial with him. Thereâs no bad blood, right?â
âRight,â you mutter, albeit uncertainly.
âBut, umâŚâ he sighs, dropping your hand to rake his fingers through his hair. âThereâs something I shouldâve told you before. But I didnât wanna freak you out.â
âWhat?â
The apprehension in your tone causes Sirius to wince. âJames and Lily, they⌠theyâve got a baby.â
Thereâs a beat of loud silence as the fact sinks in, a mount of uncertainty and hurt settling in the pit of your stomach.
âOh.â
Youâre trying not to show it, but the heartbreak on your face is painfully obvious. Sirius pouts, moving to take your hand again. âBabe, Iâm sorry. I shouldâve ââ
He doesnât get the chance to finish his sentence, the gates swinging open to reveal a beaming James Potter.
âPads,â he grins immediately, eyes locking on Sirius as he moves towards him and swoops him into a quick hug.
You take the moment to look James over. He looked exactly like you remembered â messy curls, toned biceps, that movie-star grin. Yet something felt different, in the way he pulled Sirius into a hug without all the raucous fervour he wouldâve at 16, how he held him so gently at armâs length while talking to him. Heâd softened, you realised, from the responsibilities of fatherhood and being a husband.
They pull apart a moment later, and his gaze drifts to you. His smile loses a bit of its sunshine, not softening but not quite dimming either. âY/n, hey.â
Thereâs a moment of hesitation as he looks at you, but then he seems to decide upon giving you a hug too.
âHi,â you mutter as he shortens the distance between you, needling his arms under yours to press them to your back. You embrace him in return, and a sudden pang of hurt shoots through your heart at the familiarity of the action.
Perhaps he was remembering it too, from the way he tightened his grip. Both of you were heavy on physical touch, and it was undeniably the best part of your relationship back in Hogwarts â how heâd always have a hand wrapped around your waist, how youâd wake up to cuddles and hugs every morning. You didnât exactly have anyone to hug anymore, living alone.
So you convince yourself that the reason you hold on to James for slightly longer than necessary was because you craved human touch, not because of⌠anything else.
Finally, James pulls away, his arms dropping to his sides as he gives you a small smile. You plaster one onto your face too, for his sake. âSo,â he starts as he turns around, beginning to lead you and Sirius into the mansion, âhowâve you been, Y/n?â
You can feel Siriusâ gaze burning holes into the side of your head, but choose to ignore him. âIâve been great, yeah. You?â
James nods. âThatâs cool. Yeah, Iâve been good too. Things have been fun, but kind of busy; you know, with work and Lily and the babyâŚâ He seems to realise what heâs said, and clears his throat awkwardly. Oh, of course. The baby.
Sirius is beside you in an instant, arching his eyebrows and nudging your elbow to respond.
âOh, um⌠congrats on the baby, by the way.â
James turns around to face you as you walk, and you give him a grin to prove that youâre being genuine â to show him that it didnât feel like there was a knife being twisted in your gut every time the word baby was brought up.
His eyes soften, and you know he can tell how youâre feeling. But he gives you a grateful smile, and says no more as the three of you come to a stop in front of the house.
âBy the way,â James mutters as he pushes the door open, âyou guys are like, an hour early. Youâre the only ones here.â
You immediately turn around to glower at Sirius for subjecting you to more torture than necessary by bringing you early. But he all but smirks as he follows you in.
Your eyes coast around the mansion, taking it all in. Itâs decorated in a minimalist aesthetic, white couches and brown rugs. It was pretty, that was for sure; but you couldnât help but think how different it was from Jamesâ place in the dorm â posters and stickers all over the walls, boisterously red curtains and LED lights. It used to be so full of life.
Honestly, you mightâve guessed an old couple lived here, if not for the small signs of their life as a family â the pacifier on the dining table, a cradle at the far end of the living room, and the heart-shaped photo frames lining the walls.
James watches you, a small smile playing on the edges of his lips. âYou like it?â
He knows you wouldnât like it, itâs everything you arenât. Your dorm had been just like his; trying to fit as many vinyls and posters onto that small space next to your bed as possible. There would be fairy lights in every corner and succulents on the nightstand, a dreamcatcher which heâd gifted you hanging right above your bed. You were messy, as a person, and with your love too. You thought he was messy as well; but apparently heâd gotten his shit together already.
âYeah, itâs simple. Pretty.â
âHoney ââ Lily bustles out the kitchen, a small gasp escaping her lips as she sees you and Sirius. Sheâs holding a ladle in one hand, and has her other arm wrapped around a baby perched on her waist.
You donât register it when she kisses your cheek and hugs you, asks you how youâre doing and leads you to sit on the couch. Your gaze is locked on the baby, every second spent staring at him worsening the nauseous feeling at the back of your throat.
You mustâve asked for his name, because the word, âHarry,â registers in your head. This beautiful baby, with Lilyâs deep green eyes and Jamesâ luscious curls, was Harry.
Would you have named your baby Harry? Probably not, it was too generic. But it was too late now, to pick out names and choose a less boring aesthetic for a house together.
You had lost your chance back in seventh year, that night when you were laying on Jamesâ bed, limbs tangled together as he raked his hands through your hair with all the love in the world. Youâre gonna be my husband one day, youâd whispered, feeling so much affection for him you thought your heart would burst. Yeah, baby, heâd replied with a soft smile. Weâre gonna live in a mansion, with our dogs and children and â
Children?
I donât⌠I donât want children. And thatâs where it all started going downhill, thatâs the moment Jamesâ smile turned upside down and his hand dropped from your hair. It had turned into an argument, a screaming match â and eventually a reason to break up. James couldn't understand much you feared it, the pain of pregnancy and the exhaustion that came with motherhood. And some part of you knew that you werenât blameless either â calling him awful things and accusing him of not loving you; though love was all he ever gave till the day you told him it was over.
The feeling of Siriusâ nails digging into your palm brings you back to the present, and you see him nodding absentmindedly as Lily rambles about how much trouble Harryâs been, and oh, sheâs picked up a hobby of crocheting, andâŚ
You flit your eyes to look at James sitting opposite you, gazing at you with his brows pinched in concern. Your emotions mustâve been obvious on your face, then. But he immediately looks away when Lily calls out to him, holding up Harry for him to carry.
You watch silently as James squeezes into the chair next to his wife, taking the small, lovely baby between his large, calloused hands. He smiles at Harry, looking at him though he was the most precious thing on earth. Jamesâ fingers bunch Harryâs tiny shirt as he brings him close to his face, gently pressing a kiss to his forehead. Lilyâs head lolls onto Jamesâ shoulder as he shifts Harry into a comfortable lying position in his arms.
There you have it. The perfect family, with the gorgeous wife and the adorable baby and the man who couldâve been yours if you wanted.
Itâs too much for you to take, and Sirius squeezes your hand as you start to shake. Harry coos, and you melt at how Jamesâ face breaks into a sunny beam. He tilts his head to press a soft peck to his wifeâs hair, and thereâs so much love in that simple gesture that you feel like you could die.
You feel Siriusâ worried gaze on you, your hands trembling and your knee bobbing up and down. The taste of blood from how hard youâre nibbling on your lip is grounding; it brings you back to yourself, who you are, and not who you couldâve been.
âHey,â he murmurs softly from beside you, but it doesnât get lodged into your brain. The only thing you feel is your vision of the perfect family blurring, soft streams of regret rolling down your cheek. Sirius makes a small noise of pity from beside you, and James looks up instantly, eyes widening as they lock on you. Lily is fast asleep, baby Harry staring at you with his thumb stuck into his mouth.
âY/n, you okay?â James asks gently, but you donât reply, still looking at him with that distraught look on your face. You open your mouth, but you donât seem to have the vocabulary to express the heartache you felt right that moment. It felt strangely like grief; like you were mourning for the version of yourself you never got to meet, for the version of James who didnât have the chance to be yours.
James' mouth twists downwards in a frown as he stands up and steps closer towards you. Itâs like an alarm is set off in your head, and you immediately jolt back to the present, sucking in a deep breath.
Your legs act of their own accord as you stand up, Siriusâs hand falling limp on the couch as he looks up at you in surprise. You gulp down the lump in your throat and fiercely brush the tears away, James coming to a halt in front of you. âY/n, baby ââ
âIâm not your baby.â
James slaps a hand to his mouth, eyes as wide as Harryâs now. âFuck, no, it â it just came out. I didnât mean to. Shit, youâre crying.â
âIâm okay,â you warble. James opens his mouth to retort but you donât let him, knowing that the longer you spent here, the more the gaping hole in your chest would grow. You couldnât bear it anymore, watching James with his wife and wishing it was you instead. The worst part was that it was all your fault, your stupidity and your rejection.
âIâm fine, really. IâŚIâm gonna go now, it was nice meeting you. Convey my love to Remus, Peter and the girls.â You pick up your bag, moving to the front door with a befuddled James tracking your movements.
âY/n ââ
âBye, James,â you call out halfheartedly as you slip into your shoes. He comes to stand at the door, rocking Harry from side to side. He looks almost disappointed as you make to leave.
âIâm sorry.â
You look up, surprised. âItâs not your fault.â
Jamesâ lips pursed together with guilt, seeming like he wants to say something as he opens and closes his mouth. He finally sighs, âItâs not your fault either.
It was startling, how he still knew just the right thing to say â he always had. The regret that had been clogging up your heart for years was drained out upon hearing that one sentence. James didnât hold the utter failure of your relationship against you, and that was enough. If you couldnât have his love, at least you had his forgiveness.
You give him a half smile and nod, turning around to leave. Youâd go back to yours, more of a house than a home. But at least no one but yourself could hurt you there, there was no one to turn away and no hearts to break. No one to love.
âHey.â
You spin back around to face the door, heart stopping upon seeing the moistness in his eyes. You hear the scratchiness in his throat as he sucks in a deep breath.
âJamesâŚâ
âNo, donât â donât say anything. I just wanted to tell you, umâŚâ he defeatedly runs a hand through his hair and exhales shakily. âI hope we worked out, you know, in another life.â
That catches you off guard, your heart involuntarily squeezing in your chest. James looks almost embarrassed as he says it, but you see the vulnerability in his eyes. He was right â maybe there was some planet on which you were less of a coward, another world where he could put a ring on your finger. Heâd been yours to lose in this life, perhaps he was yours to love in another.
You clear your throat, feeling nausea brimming in the pits of your gut. âYeah, I⌠I hope so too.â
You spare yourself one last glance at him before turning towards the exit, praying he didnât see the tears dribbling down your cheeks.
You squeeze your eyes shut and will yourself to trudge forward, before he can call out to you and break your heart all over again.
In a few long strides, youâre out the gates; out of Jamesâ life again.
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More Posts from Sun-kissy
hi angel! a drabble about yapper gf with remus if youâd please <3
hi, gorgeous, thank you so much for requesting!! i'm sorry this is short but this was all i could do and i wanted to answer as soon as i can <3333
remus lupin x fem!reader, fluff
"and then i was supposed find who mr. cole is, everyone was saying he was like the most important person in the office, so i felt really nervous. like, if he asks me something and i can't answer? can you imagine how bad it would be?"
"yes, dove." remus answers. "but why can't you answer?"
"because- these are intimidating people, remus. what if i say something stupid and ruin my chances? god, i felt so stressed, my stomach was aching."
remus hands you your cup of tea. you take a slow sip, your throat feels a bit raw but you need to tell every detail of your first day at the office to your boyfriend. you texted him when you can but of course it wasn't enough to let him know everything.
"so, you found mr. cole?" remus asks, rubbing your thigh with a big hand.
"yes. turns out he's actually nice, i asked him a few things about my work and he always answered with a smile. he told someone to show me the break room and he wished me good luck."
"that's so nice." remus says. "who was that person he asked, did you get to be friends?"
"i think so." you answer. it's not surprising to remus, you've always been easy to talk to. people love your sunshiny attitude, your ability to find common grounds to say things to them. "her name is victoria, i think it's a really nice name, so i told her that. she showed me the break room and how to work the coffee machine in case i need it. she was super nice, she told me all the basics to get used to the people in the office."
"i think you'll do perfect." remus says.
"you're being so nice to me, but i can't be so nice." you say with a small pout. "i mean, i'm always a bit worried to do something wrong, and i don't know the place so well now that i'm new. i don't wanna do something i don't mean to by accident. or you know, getting into someone's way. or being known the wrong way. it's like a nightmare, i always try to keep my cool. like, i'm trying to walk in the office with my heels and i look so confident, right? if only they knew what i was thinking in real."
at this point remus has to cup your cheeks and kiss you soundly. do you realize how sweet you're being? you immediately give in to the kiss, your hands stroking his hair to keep him close to you. you wish it could be possible to have him with you in the office, too. you could just get a kiss and your mood would be fixed.
"i wish we could do this in the office, too." he needs to know what you think, so you tell him. "i would be less nervous."
remus chuckles, his thumb drawing circles on your cheek. "we can try." he says. "but i'd hate if mr. cole finds out. what would he think of his new employee then?"
"that she's in love with a gorgeous, angel boy?"
"come here." he says. he will kiss you for hours if that's what it takes for you to stop being so sweet. his poor heart will not take it.
back at the cafe and iâve dragged a friend along this time!!
guys im sitting in a cafe having a maple syrup ice blended drink and wearing my cosy cardigan and working on an essay <333
your barista remus is going to be de death of me
HAHAHA pls donât die but thank you lovely!!
hi lovely what about writing some sirius fluff with an emotionally exhausted reader? you can choose how you want it to go <3
Thank you baby, I hope this isn't too short and that it did justice.
You laid on your bed, your eyes open but your mind blank as your fingers play with the thread on the sheets. Why do I feel like this? That was the question you had, but you wanted to know what it was that you're feeling. You're not happy, you're not sad, you're not anxious or scared you're just... alive.
Somewhere in your mind it registers that the door was opened after a knock. You don't have the energy to even move to face the person that entered your room. Once he sat next to you, you recognised his signature leather scent. Sirius bent down to press a soft kiss to your hair, running his fingers through it.
"Hello dove. Everything all right," he asks. You could hear the worry oozing from his voice. It takes you a little while to formulate your reply.
When you do, you take a shaky breath and say, "I... don't know."
You could practically see Sirius's frown even though he wasn't in view. He crawled under the covers with you and wrapped his arms around your body, pulling you closer to him. You look up at him, straight into his grey eyes. He graces you with a little smile, warm enough to melt ice.
You press your face against his chest, gathering all the warmth and comfort his body can give you. Sirius hugs you to his chest, burying his face in the scent of your beautiful hair.
"I love you, my little dove," he whispers as your eyes become heavy with sleep.
"Love you more," you say, although your voice sounds like a mumble against Sirius, he knows what you're saying. He loves you the way you are, and he hopes you know that.
okay | r.l.



a/n: for my academically burnt out girlies (can you tell iâm one of themđ)
tw: fluff
remus lupin x reader
Remus quietly padded down into the common room, unsurprised to find you seated at the table with parchments and books scattered around you.
There was a puddle of drool spreading from where your face rested against a book, fast asleep. Remus internally winced; there was no way that was a comfortable position for your neck.
He gently brushes the tips of his fingers against your hairline and you immediately jolt awake, almost knocking his arm in the process.
You raise your hands to rub your eyes with slowed movements, the exhaustion lining your features painfully obvious. You turn to him, befuddled, before realising who it is and softening.
You looked adorable, mussed up hair and wide-eyed. It had Remus thinking about how it would feel to wake up to the sight for the rest of his life. âHow long have you been up for, dove?â
He flattens his palms onto your shoulder blades, needling pressure into the tense muscles with his thumbs. You melt under his touch, your shoulders slumping. âNot very long,â you lie.
âItâs 4am, baby. Youâve been studying all night, havenât you?â
You draw your bottom lip between your teeth, letting out a soft sigh. âYeah⌠I guess. But I have to, thereâs still three more chapters Iâm not done revising. I just need more coffee.â
âThe last thing you need right now,â Remus mutters as he lets go of your shoulders and lowers himself into a chair beside you, âis coffee. You need to get some rest, sweetheart. Youâre not gonna be able to remember anything when youâre this tired.â
He uses his foot to push your chair around till youâre facing him. You reach for him immediately, sleepy movements causing you to lay your arms, bundled up, in his lap. Bemusedly, he takes your hands and starts to rub circles into your wrists.
âBut Iâm not tired,â you argue, though your eyelids look like theyâre physically weighing you down. Youâre blinking so forcefully Remus thinks it would generate enough energy to power a light bulb. âI just took a power nap and Iâm good now.â
âThatâs not enough, dove. Itâs late, and youâre gonna be fucked up tomorrow. You need proper rest.â
âDo I?â
âYou do.â
Your face is lovably scrunched up now, and Remus canât tell if youâre trying to challenge him or if your brain really is that fuzzy.
He moves to gather your materials and you make a small noise of protest, dazedly shaking your head. âI canât rest now, I need to finish studying first.â
You seem hardly able to track his movements, eyelids drooping shut every few seconds. âYou can study tomorrow, sweetheart. Youâve studied enough for tonight.â
You huff, stubbornly staying put in your chair. Remus rises to his feet, tucking the stack of books in one arm before firmly pulling you up with the other. You stay silent, obviously annoyed but too exhausted to fight back.
He wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you into his side as he leads you up the staircase to his dorm. The anxiety in your features is palpable, and he feels bad for worsening it. But he knows you, he knows you would never feel like youâve studied enough. Youâd work yourself to the bone if you had it your way, so it was up to him to make sure you didnât.
âYou look exhausted, baby,â he murmurs as he bends down to press a kiss to your forehead. You visibly soften, your expression morphing into one less rigid. âI am exhausted.â
âI know,â he concedes, pushing you onto the bed until youâre properly laying down. âYouâre gonna do better with rest, trust me. Youâre gonna be okay.â
You hum weakly in response, eyes fluttering shut as soon as your head hits the pillow. Even in your dazed state, your arms extend towards him.
Remus lets out a soft chuckle and climbs into the bed next to you, pulling the covers over the both of you.
You shuffle towards him, seeking his warmth. He wraps an arm around your middle and tugs till youâre snugly pressed up against each other, pecking a kiss to the soft skin beneath your eye. âI meant what I said, alright? Donât worry about the test. Youâre gonna be okay.â
âOkay,â you whisper, and he feels that last bit of uncertainty you had melt away as you deflate. Your words come out muffled as you move impossibly closer, snuggling your face into his chest. âOkay. Gânight.â
âGoodnight, sweetheart.â