The Idea That Starkid Is Canon In The Hatchetverse Is So Fucking Wild Lmao

The idea that Starkid is canon in the Hatchetverse is so fucking wild lmao

Can you imagine? Fucking Zoe from Beanies HAS to be a fan and you can’t even argue with me on that one.

I cannot describe how silly it is to imagine Jeff and Jon doing Rim Tim Timmy’s Funtime Hour while Wiggly watches and just… is confused how humanity is still intact (barely, but intact nonetheless)

When the snake venom forces you to peer into the Black & White and brings you face to face with Bliklotep

I love love love Paul being a father figure for the traumatized teens of Hatchetfield and Emma just being supportive (and I will not let go of the Nephew!Richie and Uncle!Paul allegations because it’s amazing)

hatchetverse but paul accidentally becomes everyone's parental figure. lex & hannah's? sure, they deserve a good parent who'll look out for them. stephanie lauter? yeah, why not, her dad highkey sucks. richie? absolutely, could even make them be biologically related for the lols. he meets peter through ted, they're chill (potential for angst if ted disappears in this iteration of the multiverse). he's the guy alice goes to about all of her stresses and worries- the 'cool uncle'. he meets ruth at the coffee shop where he sees emma before they have a concrete relationship, ruth is very vocal about how she wishes she could have a partner too. he could be even max freaking jagerman's unofficial dad (he does not think max has to fight off "one lousy skele'un" to be worth something). he solves grace chasity's religious guilt with "yeah no sex is normal" and she views him as a source for all advice on the matter after that. paulkins but paul is a tired dad and emma doesn't find out he has like 50 kids until they've been dating a couple months and one of them randomly runs into his house. she introduces him to tim and he just rolls with it. it's another nephew, okay, neat. he's not great with kids but he finds himself with loads of them somehow anyway. then they all face off against sadistic eldritch gods and multiple cults together like a family. what more could you want?

I felt that. I truly, deeply felt that😭

There’s no greater love than a person and their hatchetfeild hyperfixation, but I’ll never hold the REAL Richie Lipschtiz in my arms…

Even though I don’t really think that’s what was intended, this actually makes sense to me purely because it’s emphasized throughout Black Friday and NPMD that the Black and White is outside of time and space so theoretically, if the Lords in Black wanted to send Max back in time to mess with Grace before his actual death, they could.

Mashing together this theory and another one (but I can’t find it for the life of me) where Grace is the reason NPMD happens, more specifically that the Lords In Black have a hold of Grace before the plot even sets in motion.

First piece of ‘evidence’ is the whole Dirty Girl scene. The whole thing is a sexual fantasy which Grace doesn’t even realize is happening until halfway through: “Max Jägerman? What are you doing in my bathroom?” And the fact that he’s wearing a crucifix which sorta seems out of character for him, but fits what I imagine Grace sees as the ‘ideal version’ of Max.

But also, she is woken up from her bath fantasy by her dad, meaning it was more of a dream than a ‘daydream’. Also, she holds her hand up in confusion as if she didn’t know she was doing that in the first place??? Very sus

Next piece is more the vibe of her character the whole musical. (Keep in mind I haven’t watched any of the Nightmare Time episodes so I don’t know much about Abstinence Camp but I’ve heard some stuff about her being unhinged there as well. Still, my theory is specifically about Grace in NPMD.)

Anyway, it seems really weird that this girl is clinging to the idea of being pure and not a sinner (she wouldn’t even let Max hold her books because ‘she’s only 18’, seeing that as being a step toward her and Max being “in carnal embrace”) and here she is lying to her family, lying to the police, stealing a gun, and cursing at God. Also also, SHE DISMEMBERED AND HID A DEAD FUCKING BODY. And lying is the sin she’s worried about? Talk about one fucked up moral compass lol.

And my last piece is the summoning. This one is a two parter cause there’s a couple things happening here. First is the actual summoning part. When Grace, Steph, and Pete are on the floor, they look pretty terrified and confused, but right before the Lords in Black show up, Grace makes a face of either pain or discomfort which is very different from Steph and Pete’s terror. Grace is literally wincing and curling in on herself. Just something me and a few other people noticed.

And the second part of the summoning is Blinky. He literally says that they’ve been watching her and they know all the bad things she’s done. Isn’t that kinda weird that the Lord’s in Black have taken an interest in Grace and ‘haven’t done anything about it’? Between Wiggly and Pokey, they love getting involved in their little shenanigans in Hatchetfield but this time they just sat back and did absolutely nothing? I don’t think so.

Anyway, maybe I’m delusional and none of that makes any sense or I’m a damn genius lol. I would love to hear your thoughts on this about whether or not it works!

Also here’s the link to one of the theories I saw:

I FUCKING LOVE RICHIE OH MY FUCKING GOD HE IS SO ME HOLY SHIT (I also think I’m just obsessed with Jon Matteson and his extremely awkward characters but whatever)

This is the funniest character answer I could've gotten. I'm imagining Richie sitting there. Watching an anime in its entirety in subs then staying and watching it in its entirety dubbed

my headcanon is that richie is paul’s nephew